12x01 - Out With the Old, In With the New

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

[Khloé] Kylie,

do you know how to play this game?

Oh, yeah, you're a Jenner.

I feel like you're good, so…

I'm really not.
Like, who do you think I play with?

-Ah!
-Lamar?

[chuckles]

[Khloé shrieks]
Oh, it still bounced!

Wait. Why do you have all that cabbage?

This? Because I need
to stop breastfeeding.

[Kourtney] So, is it on you right now?

Yeah. Green is the color I should put on,

or does it not matter?

I think I put green,
but I only tried it once,

and then, I decided
not to stop breastfeeding,

and then, I was done with the cabbage.

Wait. I kind of, like,
I was in the shower today,

and milk came out,

and then, I was, "[bleep],
should I start again?"

-Can you?
-[Kourtney] I would.

[Kim] Two months ago,

I gave birth to my son, Saint.

He is the most beautiful boy
I've ever seen.

But I'm not gonna lie.
Like, it is so hard.

My mom used to always say,

"One is one, two is 20."

And I really do feel that way.

Being a mom is so tiring.

Don't you agree, Kourtney?

[ball bouncing]

[gasps]

[Khloé] I lost!

[upbeat music]

That's why Kim and Kanye
are together, guys,

because they fall asleep
at the drop of a dime.

[Khloé] I think Kim fakes it
half the time.

Here! Put these [bleep] things
on your tits

and call it a day!

This is ridiculous!

[Kourtney] She has them on under her…

-I have them on, you freak!
-…under her clothes,

under her bra. Relax!

This is meant to k*ll you.

-Ooh!
-[laughter]

[theme music]

[upbeat music]

[Kris] Hello?

-Hi.
-[Khloé] Hey, Mom.

[Kris] How are you? You look so skinny.

[Khloé] My god, people keep
saying that to me,

and I don't know why.
I just ate a bag of chips.

-Oh, my god.
-You look cute.

Well, eat another one.

Thanks. This is so great.

-Is Lamar here?
-No.

[Khloé] So much has happened
in the past few months.

Lamar's recovery has been
nothing short of a miracle.

Right now, they have
to stabilize all of his organs.

They don't know yet how,
how he's gonna respond to all of it.

Khloé can be at the hospital every day,

-and maybe still sleep at home.
-Well, I don't think she was

-leaving his side.
-Yeah.

[Khloé] I got told on Tuesday

that he will be discharged this Friday.

I'm very blessed and very happy
but it's just horrible timing

because I have a whole New York press trip

that's been planned for ages now.

And I feel like I have
to get him into a new house

before I go to New York.

-Mom?
-[Kris] Yeah.

-Hi.
-[Khloé] Hi.

Jaime is gonna do
the walk-through with us.

Yeah, we're bringing in all the furniture

-for Lamar, so…
-Okay.

-Okay, great.
-Yeah, show me around.

-I'm really excited to see this.
-[Khloé] Good.

[Kris] Knowing Khloé,
she probably has this

all organized in her brain, too.

Everything should be more oversized.

-Right.
-Because he's seven feet.

-Think that we're, like, giants.
-Yeah.

We like big [bleep].

Do you guys have big mirrors,
like, huge ones that go…

-Yes.
-…against a wall and just…

Yeah, mirrors would be beautiful here.

Great.

[Khloé] My mom has offered

to help me install Lamar's house,

and help me find furniture for it.

To find a house and furnish it,

especially for a seven-foot-tall man

is a big request
on such a short amount of time.

-I like those.
-Yeah, those are great, Khloé.

-That's what I would choose.
-[Khloé] I'm so excited.

-Yeah.
-Good. Good.

-We're really excited.
-[Kris] Comfortable.

I'm going to New York,
and so, I was, like, frantic,

'cause I wanna get all this stuff done,

but now I'm like, "Okay.

I can go to New York. I feel better."

I'll be there for you, Khloé.

But if anyone could get this job done,

it's definitely my mom.

This area is perfect.

-This outdoors is gorgeous.
-Think a big rug.

Yeah, and the outside, too.

[Khloé] I just want it
to look really nice.

-Yeah.
-Just so, you know,

if you're in an environment
that looks good, you feel good,

and I want him to feel like he has a home

for his journey of, like,

-constantly getting better.
-Yeah.

I want him to feel good
about the place he's staying in.

So, that's what I'm hoping
you guys could help me with.

-Yeah, we'd love to.
-Yeah.

-Yeah, it's perfect.
-Yeah, so thank you for that.

[Khloé] Good. So far,
we're on the same page.

[Jaime] Perfect.

-[phone chimes]
-Why is Kim sending me this?

Oh, my god, I'm literally dying.

[phone chimes, ringing]

[Khloé] Oh, hi, blondie!

[Kim] Hi!

Oh, my goodness!

What's going on?

I'm plotting my comeback.

Yeah, you can't leave Kim alone
for too long.

[chuckles]

[Khloé] Kim has been in hiding
after she had Saint.

She is trying on her wigs,

trying on her new looks,

and how she's going
to reveal herself to the public

when she first comes out.

Those pictures of me?

Seriously? It's like I was
wearing a fat suit.

-[Kim] You were a different person.
-I am.

[Kris] Wait. Is that my bathroom?

[Kim] Yes, it is.

I can't leave you alone
for more than five minutes.

[Kim laughs]

[upbeat music]

[birds chirping]

This is… nice.

Here, I'll show you around a little.

[Scott] I recently bought this house

to move closer to the family,

and now I'm living very close to Kourtney

and actually down the street from Kris.

You know, unfortunately, I feel like

you always kind of learn your lesson

when things have already passed
and it's too late.

I wasn't really around
for a little bit for everybody,

and, you know, it's disappointing

and hurtful to myself,
but I'm trying to make up for it,

I guess you'd say.

[Scott] Oh, you got to see P's room.

She picked this out.

[Khloé] She said, "I want polka dots"?

[Scott] She wanted this color.

-Black, pink, and yellow polka dots.
-Aw.

-How cute is she?
-She's [bleep] cute.

It's definitely, definitely
a lot, lot nicer

to be close to everybody,

and there's just a sense of feeling

like you actually have family around.

What a nice closet.

This is absolutely perfect.

Yeah, no, it's nice.

Then you're gonna find a girl

who's going to take over your closets.

What does that mean?

Like, men always get

-this much closet when they--
-I don't want a girlfriend.

Whenever, in 80 years.

[Scott] Ew.

I'm not thinking about that, to be honest.

Kourtney will always be
a huge motivation in my life.

I mean, no matter whether
we're together or not,

she's still was with me for ten years,

and, you know,

we've been through
a lot of things together.

How serene is this?

You get the outside
so you never feel depressed.

[Khloé] Look how beautiful that is.

[Scott] Yeah, I'm still depressed.

How are you depressed?

Because I'm single,
and I live here by myself.

[Scott] I fell in love
with the house that I'm in…

until I actually moved in

and realized that
it's way, way, way too big

for a single human being living alone.

You know, I'm sure
a lot of people wish these

were their problems,

but it's a drop lonely
living alone in a big house.

[Khloé] I'm so excited about this.

[Scott] Get your food on.

-Is Bob still living with you, or what?
-Mm-hm.

But do you wanna hear the craziest story?

Rob was asking what time would I be home,

and I got home 30 minutes earlier

than the time that I told him
I was coming home,

so I walked in on him
with Blac Chyna at my house.

Excuse me?

[Khloé] There's alcohol everywhere.

He's having the time of his life.

I don't need [bleep].

Don't you dare make me feel uncomfortable

in my own home.

[Khloé] I don't really care who Rob dates,

but having Chyna over at my house

without my knowledge is disrespectful.

Why can't he be honest
with me and communicate?

Because Robert knows
Chyna's Tyga's ex-girlfriend,

and I just don't want that drama
in my personal space.

I told him, I said,
"You've b*rned your last bridge."

Yeah, really, what a [bleep] nightmare

-everything has become.
-Dude, everything!

I'm like, "What did I do?"

[sighs]

[upbeat music]

[Kourtney] You wanna take it on my phone?

I can do it on yours.

PS, I did a thing on you on my app today.

-[Monica] You did?
-So,

I feel like, we should take a picture

and then, like, on my app, like,

I could Instagram it to, like, link to it.

I love this as an option for Ellen,

but I brought some other stuff.

Was there anything else
of your personal stuff

-you wanna try?
-[Kourtney] Yeah.

I am appearing
on The Ellen Show next week.

Now that my app is launching,

I love to be able to talk
about the positive things in my life,

but I haven't done any press for anything

in about three years.

I haven't talked about anything
since Scott and I broke up,

and I'm so nervous.

[Monica] Cute.

You look very badass in this outfit.

-[Kylie] Hello?
-This one.

-Hi.
-[Kourtney] Hi.

-Oh, my god, what is that?
-[squeals]

[Kylie] This is Piño.

Kylie, you didn't tell me

that you have to dance on Ellen
when you walk out.

-I don't dance on Ellen.
-[Monica] She did.

[Kourtney] I'm doing it on Thursday.

I'm like, "Why did I agree to this?"

I didn't know that you have to dance.

[Monica] You kinda dance.

-You kinda move a little.
-Do you get to pick a song?

-I was so nervous.
-I'm so nervous.

-Why am I nervous?
-I don't know why.

Literally, Monica was there.
I don't remember what I said

for the first, like, 60 seconds.

-[Monica] And she did so good.
-I don't remember.

[Kourtney] Like, do I take a sh*t before?

I haven't ever seen Kourtney
this nervous for anything,

but I know exactly how it feels

'cause I was just as nervous for Ellen.

And I'm just gonna be there for her.

Do I literally not dance at all
when I walk out?

-[Kylie] No.
-Like, I just don't move?

I just walked and was, like…

-I'm not gonna be like…
-[Kylie] No.

I mean, it would be
kind of funny if you did that.

I could be like, "Hey."
[chuckling]

-That's cute. You don't have to.
-Like, I just think it's like…

humiliating.

For real.

[upbeat music]

-[Scott] Chop-chop.
-Hi.

How are you, honey?

-Mwah. You look handsome.
-Thanks. You look nice.

Thanks for inviting me out to lunch.

-Does this mean you're buying?
-Sure.

I'm so excited.

[Scott] Kris has honestly been

really, really, really supportive of me

throughout all of this.

And, truthfully,
if the tables were turned,

you know, I don't know how I would be

towards a guy like me.

And she's been amazing.

So, you know, it's been
a real blessing for me, so…

It's pretty unbelievable.

[Kris] "Devils on horseback."

"Ceviche. Crispy California Cactus." Ooh!

"Chicken sauté lettuce cups."

Yeah, that sounds nice.

"Fried avocado"?

"Chicken wonton, peanut, sesame, citrus."

I'm gonna have the baby kale Caesar.

-Congratulations.
-Vegan… Thank you.

"Vegan-Caesar dressing,
almond, gluten-free--"

[Scott] I'm not gonna lie,
it's very difficult

for me to try to look through the menu

if you read everything out loud.

-I'm trying to find something.
-Okay, sorry.

So, wait, have you eaten here before?

Yeah, Kourtney and I used
to come here once in a while.

Aw. That's sad.

She's not dead.

[Kris chuckles]

So tell me about you.

[Scott] Physically, fine.
Emotionally, I'm always [bleep].

But I love the new house,
and it's gorgeous,

and I'm happy that I'm near you guys.

-Yeah.
-It makes me feel a little bit more safe,

and I like that I have,
you know, it's gated and…

-I like you're behind gates.
-It's definitely…

changed my life for the better
in the sense of, um…

I see the kids every single day.

Today they'll come over
and have dinner with me

-and watch a movie and…
-Nice. And you're so close.

They picked out their own bedrooms.

-Mm-hm.
-But…

You know, everybody keeps saying, like,

"Just wrap yourself up with work
and you'll feel better."

And I'm just like, "I've tried that."

Like, I just really just wanna feel decent

and be happy and take care of the kids.

[Kris] You know what? I think,

you seem to be making really good choices.

And you're putting your kids first,

which is amazing.

You're gonna get to a place of happiness

where it's just gonna feel,
all of a sudden, really good.

[Scott] We'll see where things go.

I don't know. I mean,

I'm a 32-year-old man that lives alone.

You know, in the back of my mind,

Kourtney's always there.

So all I can do

is hope one day things fall into place

and I can be able to raise
my kids together with her,

but, you know, at the end of the day,

I still love Kourtney,

and that's what's important to me,

and it always will be.

[upbeat music]

[Khloé] What are you doing? You freak.

I just, like, was looking
at my old pictures

on Instagram last night,

and I just posted some throwbacks.

Look how cool I was.

You're not cool anymore?

-[Kylie] No, I'm cooler.
-Oh, yeah.

You can't pull out your eyelashes

while we're having a conversation

'cause it's really hard to look at you.

-It's gross.
-Okay, but do you see that one

-that keeps falling in my eye?
-Yeah.

-Why?
-I don't know.

-That's gross.
-I've tried everything.

Curling it. I was gonna cut it out
with scissors this morning.

I've had one that was coming in my…

like, down, for a good year.

And guess what I finally had to do.

-Cut it?
-I had to tweeze it.

To tweeze a [bleep] eyelash
from your eyeball?

I'm ruthless.

-Ooh!
-Ugh!

I'm so overwhelmed 'cause I have to… pack.

-Are you excited? For your tour?
-[Khloé laughs]

It's not, like, a tour, just New York.

Gone for three days.

[Khloé] I'm leaving for New York
for my press tour

and this is the first week
Lamar is gonna be home

from the hospital.

And it is really causing me
a ton of anxiety,

and I think my only comfort right now

is knowing that my mom
will be by Lamar's side

and there to help me with whatever I need.

[Khloé] I'm kind of not comfortable,

you know, leaving LA right now.

I don't have a caregiver,

I don't have any of that,
so I'm just, like,

I have to leave him
with people that I trust.

Yeah.

'Cause he can't sleep alone or anything.

He doesn't have a phone
or anything like that,

like, in case something happens.

That's okay. Going to New York.

So I leave Tuesday.

It's a lot.

I know, it's a lot.

Don't freak me out more.

[upbeat music]

-[woman 1] Hello.
-[Kris] Hi.

This looks so nice.

Welcome to the Wellness Kitchen.

My name is Erika Wong.

I'm one of the registered dieticians here.

Today we're gonna focus
on kid-friendly recipes.

But really our whole philosophy in here

is about plant-based nutrition.

And that's how the kids eat,
that's how Kourtney

-likes them to eat anyway.
-Oh, trust me, I get it.

-So, yeah.
-I know.

[Scott] Kris and I have decided

we are going to take
a little cooking class.

Kourt's over-the-top extreme

with the whole gluten-free, organic.

She's like, "I don't think it's right

that he eats Cap'n Crunch there

because he wants to come over there
just so he can eat Cap'n Crunch."

So I'm trying to do everything I can.

[Kris] Yeah.

So I want to at least

be able to supply healthy food
for the kids

when they're at my house,

and I mean, I think Kourtney
will appreciate it.

I feel like I'm cutting up
somebody's body.

-Scott.
-Oh, my. [laughs]

[Scott] To be able to cut something, it's…

-pretty proud of myself.
-Good. That's really good.

-You did a good job.
-Yeah, thank you.

So we're moving on to turkey meatballs.

-[Kris] Meatballs.
-Oh, meatballs. That sounds fun.

So garlic has a tendency to burn.

-Never turn your back on garlic.
-Right.

Never go against the family, Kris.

Just gotta get in there like that.

[Scott] Oh. I got one meatball
stuck in there.

-[Kris] Okay.
-[Scott] This is a lot of work.

[Kris] It's not really.

This is nothing compared
to a lot of recipes.

I'm from New York.
I'm just so used to just ordering in.

I know, but it's gonna be
so much healthier for the kids.

-Okay. I know.
-And Kourtney's

gonna be really happy.

[Kris] I think Scott is finding his way.

And I think he realizes
that he messed up a good thing.

He was with Kourtney for the last decade,

and that's a big change for anybody.

And all I wanna do
is just be here for him right now.

His kids are my grandchildren.

So, yeah, I love Scott a lot.

Oh, the cauliflower is amazing.

Cauliflower is so good.

-I love the chicken.
-Mm, mm, mm.

Well, this could be your new, like, hobby.

No, I love it. I mean, I--

[Kris] You could become, like,
one of the biggest chefs in the world.

I… I don't… I don't think
that's gonna happen.

But I'll settle for the smallest.

You never know.

[upbeat music]

[plane whooshes]

[phone line ringing]

-[Pat] Morning, Khloé.
-Hey, Pat. How are you?

-Uh, great. How about you?
-I'm good. Thank you.

I wanted to say hi to Lamar.

[Pat] He is finishing up
his shower right now.

Um, do you want me to have him
call you when he steps out?

[Khloé] Yeah, I would love that.

[Pat] All right, Khloé, have a good one.

-He'll call you in a few, okay?
-Okay, thank you.

[mellow music]

[Khloé] It is really, really hard
being away from Lamar.

All I'm thinking about is,
"Is Lamar okay?"

"Is he eating at the right time?"

"Is he being taken care of?"

But I have to get it together.

I'm in New York for my press tour,

and it's gonna be crazy.

I have so many places lined up,

and I have to try and just focus.

I'm just jumping from show to show.

Live with Seth Meyers.

[Seth] Khloé Kardashian.

[audience cheering]

[Khloé] Live with Kelly and Michael.

[announcer]
Please welcome Khloé Kardashian.

[Khloé] Howard Stern.

I love you always.

There's just so much going on.

[Joyce] Howard Stern and you,

you guys are so magnetically crazy.

Oh, that made me so nervous.

[Joyce] Because?

Um, just the Lamar questions.

Obviously, I know I have
to talk about it, but that's…

I'm not one to talk about that stuff.

I was glad that you opened up
more than I thought you would.

[Joyce] And those are his
kind of questions all the time.

But I just, I don't like
talking about someone else.

Like, that's for them to talk about.

[Khloé] Howard and everyone
else today keeps asking me

about my relationship with Lamar.

How am I doing? Am I back together?

And like, I just… I don't know.

[Khloé] It's just a really
difficult thing to answer.

-[Andy] To begin the year with Caitlyn…
-[Khloé] Yeah.

…and end the year with Lamar,

do you think you and Lamar
could ever get back together?

You obviously loved him very much.

I've learned to say, "Never say never,"

because if you would've asked me
two years ago

if this is what the events
would have happened in my life,

-I would've said, "Never."
-[Andy] Right.

But now, I can't say that.

[Khloé] I love Lamar,
and we've been through so much,

but there's so much more
that has to be resolved.

There's a lot of hurt and things
that need to be fixed.

I don't know.

I'm figuring out
where I really am right now.

[upbeat music]

[Jen] I mean, how gorge do you look?

Gorge.

[Kris] Oh, my goodness,
everybody has so much energy.

[Kourtney] Well, I don't.

-I drink this calming tea at home.
-Wait…

I was yawning the whole car ride up.

I almost fell asleep.

[Kris] You're not supposed
to have calming tea

before you do The Ellen Show.

Why? I thought I needed to calm down.

I was like,
"I'm gonna have a heart att*ck."

No, you are gonna do great.
Why are you so nervous?

-You've done a million talk shows.
-[Kourtney] I know.

[Kris] So, just relax.

Just go out there and tell them
how much you love your mom.

That'll calm your nerves.

I think I'm so nervous
to do The Ellen Show

because there's been, you know,
a lot going on

with everybody in our family,

and it's like, if you say the wrong thing,

everyone gets mad.

And I just… you know,

I never know what someone's gonna ask.

[phone ringing]

Hello, guv'nah.

[Khloé] How's it going?

Oh, it's going.

-Your sister looks really cute.
-[Kourtney] Khloé, do you really want me

to Facetime you?

You're Kourtney [bleep] Kardashian
in a gold lamé suit!

-Yeah.
-[Kourtney] Yes.

[Kris] Kourtney is just getting back
into the swing of things

after she's gotten back

into the best shape of her life,

and she's the old Kourtney again.

It's kind of cute that she's so nervous.

[Kris] But she looks great.

What is wrong with you?

-[Kourtney] I'm fine.
-She's just feeling

-a little bit insecure today.
-[Kourtney] No.

I'm not insecure.

What the [bleep]?

[Kris] Oh, sorry.

-[laughs]
-[woman] We are ready for you.

-Yeah. I'll be back.
-Good luck.

[audience cheering]

-[Kourtney] Hi.
-[applause]

Um, can I ask you about Scott?

How is he? What's going on?

Are y'all together
or are you not together?

Well, we're not together.

I feel like every day is different,

but we're totally getting along, like,

we have three beautiful kids together.

-And… Thank you.
-They are beautiful.

Does Justin Bieber help
with the kids at all or…

[laughter]

[audience cheering]

-Okay. Good.
-You did good.

-[Kris] Well, you did great.
-[Kourtney] What do you think?

Wasn't the beginning, like, so bad?

[Kris] No. It was fun.

I thought you just seemed
so cool, calm, collected.

Well, I don't even know
what the [bleep] I said.

[Kris] No, it was funny.

-It went by so fast.
-And you looked beautiful,

gorgeous.

You guys, I feel, like, such a relief.

So good.

[lively music]

[crowd clamoring]

[phone ringing]

-[Kris] Hi, gorge.
-[Khloé] Hey, Mom.

[Kris] What's going on, my little angel?

[Khloé] Well, I wanted to call you

to tell you about these texts
I got from Caitlyn.

She was like, "What happened
to family sticking together?"

[Khloé] I am on this New York press trip,

and I am getting insane,
aggressive texts from Caitlyn.

It all stems from
my Howard Stern interview,

but I said nothing inappropriate,

I said nothing that was new information,

everything has been said before.

And I said, "You slaughtered my mother

and you have the nerve to say,

"What happened
to family sticking together?'"

I said, "You jumped that ship
as soon as you did Diane Sawyer,

and you, like, att*cked my mom!"

But instead, tells me to get a life

and to shut up, and all this,

I'm like, "You shut up
and you get a [bleep] life!"

Mom, can you handle this?

[Kris] Yes.

If Caitlyn were to actually
listen to my interview,

she would know that nothing bad
or harmful was said.

She could tell me to [bleep] off
all she wants,

I don't have a relationship
with her, I'm done.

[upbeat music]

[phone line rings]

[Caitlyn] Yes?

Hi.

[Caitlyn] Hey, how you doing?

Well, I'm good,

I… I'm just a little concerned, like,

what's going on with Khloé?

[Caitlyn] Well, she's out there
talking [bleep] about me.

See, now, I don't want her
talking about me, okay?

You don't go on [bleep] Howard Stern,

call me a liar…

She was doing interviews,
and I don't think

she really thought about the fact

that you might come up.

[Caitlyn] Then say,
"I don't talk about that.

Caitlyn is doing great.

I've never seen her happier,
next question."

We're the parents,

we have to be the bigger force

of, of their emotional stability I mean…

[Caitlyn] Then don't have her
going out to the press.

Khloé has enough going on
right now with Lamar

and is very stressed out.

[Kris] The last thing she needs is anyone

getting angry at her about anything,

especially Caitlyn.

I don't think Khloé
would ever say anything

to intentionally hurt anybody,

and everybody just has to understand

that sometimes things are misinterpreted.

[Caitlyn] Why does she even talk about it?

Don't bring it up.

What do you think I said to you
about Vanity Fair,

you [bleep] say something nice
or you don't say anything at all!

[Caitlyn] Nothing was said
that was terrible

in that Vanity Fair article.

All you said was negative [bleep].

So, now you know how I feel.

This is not intentional.

You're making this, like, so hard.

[Caitlyn] Khloé's out there telling
a bunch of [bleep] about the family!

Khloé isn't out to get you.

You were her father!

[Caitlyn] Don't…

Okay, but you were her dad
since she was five years old.

Like, give her a break.

[Kris] Being a mom can be so difficult

when you have to protect your kids

and look out for what's best for them.

I hate it when any of my kids

are having a hard time about anything,

and it can sometimes be so overwhelming

that I just wanna break down.

But at the end of the day,

I wanna be there for them no matter what.

[cries]

[Caitlyn] If she wants
to call me and discuss it,

I will calmly discuss it, okay?

-All right?
-Okay.

-Bye.
-See you.

[electronic music]

[photographer] I just need one more sh*t.

Can we get Kendall?

[man] I think we're good now.

[photographer] Look here. Good. Good.

Great. Good. Awesome. Love that.

[camera shutter clicking]

Good. Pretty.

Today Kylie and I are doing a photo sh**t

for our new clothing line,
and we are very excited.

Turn away. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kendall] It's so fun
to have our lines come out

every once in a while and grow with us

and to get more mature every time.

-Bye, guys. Thank you so much.
-Bye.

-Bye-bye.
-Bye.

[phone ringing]

-Hey, Kim.
-[Kendall] What did he give her?

-[Kylie] Kendall, an iPad.
-A big one? The massive one?

Yes, shut [bleep] up.

I gave that to him for Christmas.

Did you give him a keyboard or no?

Yes! A keyboard, a pen, and an iPad.

For Christmas.

Kim, you're gonna die right now.

He regifted

-Kendall's birthday gift.
-[Kendall] I'm so mad.

I would've given that to someone else.

[Kendall] Rob is dating someone

that has kind of had
a bad history with my family,

and he fully regifted my gift.

On top of it, it's so annoying
to find out through social media

because his girlfriend posted it.

Like, there's some things
that just aren't cool,

and I don't think this is very cool.

[Kendall] I'm gonna tell him
to give it back to me.

[Kylie] Kendall, you need
to call him right now.

Call him right now and say,
"I want it back,"

and see what he says.

[line rings]

Hi.

Yo, um, can I have my iPad back?

[Rob speaks indistinctly]

No, for… Bible, I want my iPad,

my pen, and my keyboard back.

You tell him, I want them right now.

What?

[Rob] What pen?

It came with an iPad, a pen,
and a keyboard,

and I want it all back

because if you're not gonna use it,

I have someone who actually
really is dying for it.

One, I'm annoyed.

Two, I'm actually hurt
that you regifted my [bleep] gift

that I went out of the way to give you.

[mouths]
Oh, my god.

[Rob] That's the first time you've ever
gotten me a gift in your entire life.

Why are you being so defensive?

[Rob] You're hilarious.
Buy it yourself, you moron.

Send me the link.

Send me the link, bro. Send me the link.

[beeps]

[Kylie] He knows he's wrong.
You should just say,

"You know you're in the wrong."

[Kendall] Ungrateful.

[upbeat music]

[Kris] Oh, it smells good.

-Hi.
-[Scott] Hi.

How are you?

-I'm excited, is what I am.
-I've never…

-I've never done this before.
-Stop.

-I think Kourt's coming, too.
-Oh, she is?

[Scott] I'm going to have a dinner party

-at my house.
-Okay.

I want to invite the whole family over.

I wanna make pretend
I'm running a real household.

Okay.

I know how important it is for Scott

to spend time with Kourtney,

but hopefully, he'll realize that

it's just not about improving his life

or making things better,

so he can get back
into Kourtney's good graces.

He needs to figure things out

because he wants to make
his own life better

and improve his own self.

You know what, your house
is kind of Cape Cod,

so, like, these navy and white towels.

-Like, this in the kitchen?
-[Kris] Yeah.

[Kourtney] Hi.

[gasps]

-Hey.
-Well, look who it is.

It's Buford.

-Hey…
-[Kris] How are you?

I'm having the best time.

Scott, do you like these mixing bowls?

They're really cute.

[Kourtney] Did you get white towels or no?

-We need to get the white.
-She went blue…

-I would get rid of the blue.
-She's…

She's a tough cookie

-you're talking about here.
-Goddang.

I do trust her.

She did run my life for 11 years.

[Kourtney] When it comes to Scott,

I'm not looking

to get back together any time soon.

I don't have specific boundaries set,

but coming to help him pick out stuff

for his kitchen in his new house

as a friend, like,
I'm totally okay with that,

and I don't feel like
I'm giving any false hope.

[Kris] We need a Kn*fe set, Kourtney.

Could you help him pick out a Kn*fe set?

[Kourtney] Personally,

I don't like keeping
a Kn*fe set on the counter,

because I feel like people can grab them

-or the kids can grab them.
-I agree.

-I think they should be in the drawer.
-Okay.

Do you like this?

This is gonna make you look like
more of a home

because you're gonna have a teakettle.

I mean, I kind of wanted
Kourtney's opinion a little bit.

Personally, my teakettle is from here.

That one's cooler than the one I have.

I just wanna have what's normal
because at some point

I wanna have all of you guys over
for dinner

at the new house.

-So we need knives…
-That's what I'm trying

-to accomplish.
-[Kourtney] That's cool.

Okay, I'm gonna go. Bye, guys.

-I'm going to Khloé's.
-Why?

-[Scott] You're not even done.
-[Kourtney] We are done.

I don't have all day.
I have to meet Khloé.

[Scott] Kourt came,
she stopped by, said hi.

All I wanted was kind of, her two cents,

and maybe we got one, not two.
In the back of my mind,

I want everybody to be proud of me,

and I want my kids to be proud of me,

I want Kourtney to be proud of me.

[Scott] But she seems to not really care,

so I'm a little disappointed.

-Thanks for coming by.
-Thanks for helping out, kid.

-It's been really fun.
-[Kourtney] You're welcome.

[upbeat music]

[Khloé] Ooh, chicken tenders.

[Kris] This looks yummy.

Yay.

Kourtney, you made an amazing dinner.

-You spent all day doing this.
-Thank you, yes.

[Kris] Yeah, really thoughtful, so…

You guys, I have some really good news.

You're pregnant.

If you're pregnant,
I think I might slit my wrists.

If I'm pregnant, I'll slit my own wrists.

Mom.

-[Kim] So…
-What?

I just showed Larsa my vag*na.

[quirky music]

And she thinks it looks gorgeous

-and perfect after a baby.
-Good job.

[Larsa] We're very good friends.

[Kris] Oh, my god. She showed you?

[Kourtney] Can I show you mine later?

What do you show?

You lay down on your back
and, like, bust it wide open?

No, I was sitting on the toilet,
and I just took a mirror,

and I said, "Stand here
and look in the mirror."

Come on, you guys, do you have
to just talk like this?

You weren't raised like this.

-[laughter]
-Oh, my god.

-I can't even eat my dinner now.
-Sorry.

[laughing]

[Kris] This is too much.

[Kim] People Magazine,
"How Blac Chyna Went

from Kardashian Insider to Enemy."

[Khloé] By the way,

Rob's out of my house.

-Good.
-[Kris] No, that's terrible.

We have to be a little more understanding.

-You can't just--
-No, we just have

to stop babying him and step back.

[Khloé] Robert has left
the premises of my house

and moved in with,

I guess, his girlfriend, Blac Chyna.

I don't know where they stay,

I don't what they… I don't know anything.

[Kylie] He's asked Stone
if his house is still for sale

right next door to Chyna's.

[Kourtney] What?

He's trying to buy the house
next door to her.

[Kris] Girls, you know,

he can't find his way right now.
He's lost.

Are you paying
for his down payment, Cruella?

[tense music]

You're calling me Cruella?

You better not be paying
for his down payment.

He doesn't deserve it.

[Khloé] You work so hard for your money,
and you need to enjoy your money.

-Yeah.
-I agree.

Well, first of all, I wouldn't
buy a house for someone.

I would buy a house for myself
as an investment.

-[Khloé] And let him live in it.
-[Kris] Well, somebody

-would have to pay rent.
-Same thing, don't.

We're not stupid, so stop.

I'm not stupid either.

You should not be paying for your son

that is almost 30 years old
to buy a house.

[Khloé] Drop him.

Cut the cord.

[Kris] You guys can judge me all day long.

I came here to have a nice dinner,

so just, everybody, relax.

You… you all have to have somebody

to blame and criticize.

Instead of saying, "What's the problem…"

The problem is you. You. Yes, it is.

No, all of you can [bleep] off,

and go think of something else
to talk about.

I've seen you guys through
so much [bleep] that you do

that I have to [bleep] put up with.

"I'm married for 72 days."

Really? That was normal.

I mean, the [bleep]
we've all gone through,

you guys can do anything
you want, and it's okay,

and I'm supposed to accept it all.

And I'm gonna do the same thing for him.

So stop judging me.

[upbeat music]

[Kris] Hello?

Hi, Kris. Good to see you again.

Nice to see you.

Hi.

-Hi. How are you?
-Hi, there.

-Good to see you.
-Good to see you.

I'm so excited to see this.
I haven't been here, yet…

-[Kris] Stop it.
-No, I've been waiting.

Oh, my god. How great is this?

[upbeat music]

[Kris] Look at this room.

[Khloé] This looks so nice and so comfy.

And we made this specially for the house.

-Cool, no way!
-This is all manufactured by us.

-[Kris] What?
-[Khloé] This room is so nice.

[Kris] Oh, my god.

I love how it just feels peaceful.

I love the art.

-I love the lamps.
-[Khloé] I love it all.

I absolutely love Lamar's house.

[Khloé] I think it is just clean
and serene and comfortable.

It was a quick turnaround.

-Forty-eight hours.
-Go for it.

[Khloé] I think it's so incredible

that even after our huge fight last night,

my mom is still here helping me

put the finishing touches
on Lamar's house.

And I might not always show

my appreciation as well as I should,

but I do appreciate my mom.

[Khloé] I know she goes above and beyond
in everything she does,

and I know how much work all of this was

to get Lamar's house together.

I'm incredibly grateful,

and I really don't know
what I would do without her.

-Mom.
-[Kris] Hmm?

[Khloé] I just wanna say
I love you so much

and thank you for helping me do this.

Hold on. Coming around this big island.

-I love you.
-I love you, too.

And thank you.

-That was fun.
-For always being so supportive

and just getting [bleep] done.

I mean, without you,
I don't know what I would do.

And we're all very
verbally abusive to you,

and I think we need to stop doing that.

Me too.

We did it. He's home.

This is like a miracle.

Truly is.

-You gonna start crying?
-Yeah.

Why?

Because it's a miracle that he's here.

-Okay.
-And that we're at this step.

You know? We're really blessed
and he's come a long way.

-Um…
-[train whistle blowing]

What is that train noise?

That's my text.

I figure if I hear a train,

it might encourage me to go somewhere.

Oh, we should take a train trip

and have, like, our own car
and have lunch…

They're not as glamorous as you think.

-The train.
-Mm.

-It sounds good, though.
-Mm-hmm.

[upbeat music]

[Khloé] I'm having a really hard time

communicating today.

How do you say "maneurisms"?

"Maneurisms"?

[Kourtney] Mannerisms.

[Khloé laughs]

-How do you say it?
-"Maneurisms"?

[Khloé] I said "maneurisms."

You know what word Mom says
that drives me insane?

"Poy-trit."

[laughter]

[Kim] Pretty yeah, she does.

-But is that true, is that how you say it?
-What?

-I say "portrait."
-Portrait.

[Khloé] Portrait. Say it again?

Mom says "poy-trit."

[laughter]

-That's not normal.
-[Kim] Yeah.

[Khloé] You know what?
I feel really bad for Mom.

-Why?
-I feel like there's always drama

with one of us and it just sucks.

And to be a mom that's so supportive

-and so hands-on can't be easy.
-With all of us.

Yeah, with all of us.

My mom has actually been super hands-on

in all of our lives.

[Khloé] And I think we all forget

how many people she takes care of.

She's helped me with Lamar's move

and all this Caitlyn drama.

And so, like, now that Rob's
trying to figure out his life

and now that he's dating Chyna,

and the divide with everybody
in the family,

it has to be hard on Mom,

and we can't ask her to pick sides.

[Khloé] Even if I don't agree
with what Rob's doing,

I know my mom is just being Rob's mom,

and she's doing exactly
what she would do for me

or for Kim or Kourt.

And I think we just have to be
way more aware

and appreciative of everything
she does for us.

I mean, we might not agree
with everything,

but, you know, we know
she's coming from a good place,

and it is her son,
so let's just, like, back off.

-Yeah.
-I can back off.

With ease.

Easy?

Yeezy.

[upbeat music]

[Khloé] Oh!

-How are you?
-[Kim gasps]

Is this the new little dog?

Oh, my god, I've never seen you
get remotely excited about an animal.

Well, 'cause it's so little, it's so cute.

Uh, what happened to you?

-I changed.
-I thought we were gonna go

to Scott's house.

[Kourtney] I'm not…
I just, like, I can't do it.

[Kourtney] We were supposed to have

a nice family dinner together with Scott,

but he's gone missing.

You know, there's definitely times

when he'll take a few steps forward,

and then a few steps backwards,

and it's just, like, this cycle

that has been going on for years.

And that's why I finally had
to step out of it.

Well, I haven't seen him,
but I'm happy to Facetime him.

[Kim] That's crazy.

Thought we were having a shindig
at his house.

[line ringing]

[upbeat music]

[Kris] Hi.

Hey, Mom.

-You wanna sit down?
-[Kris] I'd love to.

-Hi, Kourt.
-[Kourtney] Hi, Mom.

[Kris] Um, where's Scott?

[Kourtney] Um, I called him

when I was going to
pick up Mason from school.

Scott and Tyga have been
hanging out at his house.

All day and night.

[Kris] I thought Scott
was finding his way,

and his balance.

[Kris] I'm really disappointed
and worried about him.

It breaks my heart.

I almost called T

screaming on the absolute top of my lungs,

you don't even know
what would've gone down.

[Kylie] Who cares?

I know Kourtney kind of gets mad
at Tyga sometimes,

and redirects her anger towards him

since Tyga and Scott
are together all the time,

so I'm kinda stuck
between a rock and a hard place.

Scott needs to grow some balls
and be a bigger person.

-No, he just needs to grow up.
-[Kim] Yeah.

[Kourtney] But I'm saying
not for me, for my kids.

Scott really needs to want to get his life

in the right direction for himself,

but I just don't want Tyga

to be like a negative influence on Scott.

So, it just gives me a bad taste
in my mouth.

It pisses me off that people like Tyga,

who should know better,

that are close to our family,

that don't just, like,
find some other friends.

[Khloé] This season on

Keeping Up with the Kardashians…

[laughter]

My one fan. Thank you, Khloé.

Are you thinking about having a third?

Kanye has said it every single day.

I don't think I can carry another one.

[paparazzi clamoring]

I can't remember what it's like to go out,

and nobody know who I am.

[Khloé laughing]

[Khloé] Oh, my god, there's a paparazzi.

Lamar wants to go to Kanye's fashion show.

[whooping]

[Khloé] This is Lamar's
first time out in public.

[Kim] This is the most epic day!

Lam is nervous about meeting Caitlyn.

What has happened? We got to talk.

-[Kris] You guys know where you are?
-Vail.

[Kris] Go for it!

[Khloé] Here's to creating new memories.

Oh, my god.
[shrieks]

[laughs]

I don't think
a girl's ever done that for me.

No successful relationship
can happen in Los Angeles.

-Let's move.
-[laughs]

He's been so good.

[Kourtney] I almost wanna call Tyga,

and just literally go off on him.

You think I'm the bad guy all the time.

[Tyga] He still has to make
a decision as a man.

Trust me, I'm trying.

Welcome home, baby.

The fact that now he wants
to be so public blows my mind.

[Rob] I don't want no fighting.

You make sure that your girlfriend

doesn't publicly bash your sisters.

[Khloé] No.

He proposed in front of her whole family.

That's so [bleep] up.

Listen to your hostility in your voice.

That's exactly why I don't say anything.

This is the first time I ever proposed
to someone in my life.

Don't come at me with some bull [bleep].