01x12 - A Barn Day's Night/Meet the Ferrets

[bunniefuu]

I'm just heading to the fields, duke, I'll be back.

[Animal noises]

Clear!

[♪...]

All right!

"Rat-abunga!"

Man: ♪ from the haystacks up to the hilltops ♪

♪ We go on dancing...

Otis: whoo-hoo!

♪ ...through the night

Ow, ow, ok, ow.

Ow!

Whoo!

♪ Do-si-do your partner, now

Ahh!

♪ Gonna party now till the morning light ♪

♪ Do-si-do and don't you know ♪

♪ It's just the way we animals roll. ♪

[Tires squeal... Engine revs]

Ha-ha!

[♪...]

[Applause and whooping]

All right, whoo.

Give it up for the comedy stylings

Of the world's angriest chick.

Thanks, you've been a terrible crowd.

Now get lost, seriously, worst crowd ever, seriously.

Well, what an adorable pile of hate.

Ok, now, next up.

It's everybody's favorite canine barbershop trio:

The three... Psst.

Root, they didn't show.

What? Where the heck are they?

[Barbershop quartet style]: ♪ way to go, we're totally lost... ♪

[Singing in harmony]: ♪ yes, because of your stupid directions ♪

♪ You're just a couple of ♪

All: ♪ mor...ons

Well, maybe you folks would like to hear some impressions.

Let's see, uh... You're ugly...

And you...[Audience laughter]

Guys, the singing dogs didn't show.

We don't have a musical act.

[All gasp]

It's awful.oh, the shame.

What are we gonna do?

It's the end of everything.

Well, why don't we go on instead?

Look, if we all pool our musical talents

I'll bet we can come up with a great new sound.

Here, I'll start us off.

Guys, I think peck's onto something.

We canall write a song together.

Now I'm not saying it'll be easy.

[Strums a chord]

[Strums ending chord]

Wow, that was easy.

Hey, pip, give, this to root.

You folks on a date... Really?

You know you could do bet...

[Audience laughter]

Ladies and gentlemen, slight change of plans.

Please welcome, all the way from backstage:

The weevils.

[Applause]

[Strikes chord]

♪ It's been a barn day's night

♪ And we've been layin' 'round in the mud ♪

♪ It's been a barn day's night

♪ Yeah, we've been chewin' on our cud ♪

♪ But when the milkin' is done

♪ We set our udders on fun

♪ And start feelin' that it's all right ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Yeah, yeah.

[Cheering wildly]

[Rooster crows]

[Noisy distant crowd]

[Yawns]

Man, last night was a blast.

I can practically still hear the crowd chanting our names.

Crowd: [chanting]: wee-vils, wee-vils.

Hey, I practically hear them, too.

Me too.

Get out of my head!

Wait a minute.

I think that's coming from outside.

[Hysterical screams]

What the cud?

There's a bunch of crazed humans screaming at us.

They're zombies...

Come to gorge on our flesh.

Or fertilizer thieves

Here to steal our precious dung.

What do they want, what do they want?

I'm thinking... Your autographs?

[Weevils singing...]

Huh? Huh? Huh?

Pip: I posted last night's performance on the internet.

It got over three million hits.

So those people outside are... Fans?

[Crowd chanting]: weevils, weevils, weevils...

Weevils?

The only bugs I truly fear.

To the weevil shelter.

[Footsteps descending]

[Door squeaks shut]

[Many locks clicking...]

[Electronic beeper]

Woman: [recorded]: system armed.

Guys, we're going out there

A ragtag bunch of smelly barn animals

But we're coming back rock stars.

Rock'n'roll. Yeah, baby.

Hello, cleveland.

Aw, that's great, otis.

Let's just be careful not to let fame and fortune

Poison the magical friendship we all share.

Otis: how would that happen? Get out of here.

As if.

[Gags] sheesh.

Hey, otis, ok, if make a documentary about how fame and fortune

Is about to poison the magical friendship we all share?

Works for me.

All right, guys, it's showtime.

[Crowd cheering wildly]

Here they are, people, the weevils.

Guys, some say you're destroying society

With your loud music and animal-like appearance.

Anything you'd like to say?

Uh, we just wanna rock.

Music can change the world.

I like pie.

Wow, aren't they adorable folks?

Get 'em!

[Wildly cheering]

[♪...]

[Crowd screaming]

[Screaming continues]

[♪...]

Crowd: ohh...

[Crowd moans]

[♪...]

Pip: overnight, america had fallen in love with the fab five.

But the animals would soon discover that when fame walks in the door

Friendship goes out the window.

Boy, being chased for eight hours

Is m*rder on a gal's hooves.

Great news, everyone.

I just booked us on the "hey, hey, hey!" Show.

Pip: what- that's only the biggest music show on tv.

We're gonna be huge.

And have access to expensive therapists.

That's right, guys, nothingcan stop us now.

Wow, this is so exciting.

We should start practicing right now.

Great idea, peck.

The "otis experience" needs to sound tight.

What, the "otis experience"?

Yeah, you know, I thought we should change our name

To reflect my role as the band's charismatic front cow.

Huh, charismatic nothin'.

It's my solid bass thump-a-dump that gets the fans groovin'.

Nuh-uh, it's my high-voltage choreography.

Oh.

"Rolling pebble" magazine

Cites my ingenious rhyming of "mud" and "cud".

[Overlapping arguing]

Great stuff, great stuff.

Guys, guys, stop arguing.

We allcontributed to the band's success.

And you play the...

Triangle.

[Arguing resumes]

Pip: the infighting had begun.

Three days later, the weevils reconvened

Backstage at the "hey, hey, hey!" Show.

But in that brief time

Fame had begun to work its wicked ways.

Otis: pip, is that you?pip: no.

Otis: I know it's you, I can hear you narrating.

Pip: oh, man.

[Sighs]

Where have you guys been?

We're on live in minutes.

Sorry, peck, freddy tossed the limo driver out of the car.

I told him not to look me in the eye.

And would you please refer to me by my new name, this.

What is this?

I specifically requested spring water from a peruvian glacier.

This is from some other dumb glacier.

[Glass shatters]

Greetings, all, I'd like you to meet my entourage.

'Sup?

Hey, how come he gets an entourage?

Pig, that's not an entourage, that's just an old goat.

Yeah, well, that's one more goat than you got, sweetheart.

I could've gotten a goat. So go get one.

I repeat...ahem.

[With english accent]: 'ello, mates.

Are you all ready for tonight's telly broadcast, huh?

What-what?

Big ben, fish'n'chips.

Otis, what are you talkin' like a pirate for?

And what's with the new clothes?

You're gonna upstage everyone.

Sorry, blokes, I can't hear you.

As it turns out...

I'm a huge rock star, right on.

[All talking at once]

Great stuff, great stuff.

[Arguing continues]

[Screaming]: stop it!

Just look at what success has done to us [sobbing].

I thought we were all friends.

I thought each of us contributed to our sound.

Are you too self-centered to see that stardom

Is tearing us apart?

I'm sorry, what do you play again?

It's a thing that makes a noise, it's clangy, isn't it?

Give us the first letter.

A tuba?

Is it made out of a car?

I can rewind.

Is it bigger than a bread box?

Oh, it's a bread box.

That's it, I'm out of here, and I'm taking my

"Tri" "angle" with me!

Oh, I got it, it's a triangle. Triangle, oh.

Abby: that was it.

Wait, peck, come on, don't run out on us now.

[Door shuts]

Those bread box players are real whack jobs, aren't they?

Expensive too.

Oh, no.

Now what are we gonna do?

I don't know, look, nobody panic.

I'm sure we'll sound pretty much the same without peck's triangle.

All right, grab your instruments, guys.

Ah, one, two, three, four.

[Musical cacophony]

Maybe we just weren't in tune- uh, let's try again.

[Musical cacophony]

Well, there's only one explanation.

Peck was using a magictriangle.

That makes sense. Oh, good thinking.

See what I'm saying?

Guys, it's not the triangle- peck was right.

We all contributed to our special sound.

Once we let our stupid egos get in the way

We lost the thing that made us great.

A magic parallelogram?

You're right otis, I feel terrible.

How could we have been such [sobs]... Jerks?

You should all be ashamed.

Actually, could you all look moreashamed?

Pig: how's this?

All right, minutes till showtime, guys.

Let's go find peck.

[♪...]

Oh, well, thanks so much, tell all your friends [chuckles].

Oh, it's you.

Take five, guys.

Five what?

I'm not sure.

That tiny feathered kid talks funny.

Peck, you were right.

We were wrong to let fame and fortune

Get in the way of our friendship.

Will please come back and play with us tonight?

Yeah, buddy. Yeah, we need you.

Come back, peck.

Thanks, but no thanks.

Maybe my new band isn't famous, and maybe we're not talented

But at least we don't argue over who's the star.

We simply take joy in making music.

Ow.

[Grunting]

All right, peck, I understand.

Just let us know if you change your mind.

[Instruments warming up]

Stage manager: seconds, weevils.

Well, guys, we're probably about to sound

Like the back end of a dyspeptic elephant on live television

But at least we're gonna do it as friends.

Peck: hey...

You fellas still looking for a triangle player?

Peck! Peck! Peck!

Otis: hey, what made you come back, buddy?

I couldn't let my best friends down on their big night, could i?

Plus, the pizza twins had to go the hospital.

Dude, music's dangerous.

We're living on the edge.

Both: ♪ doodle-luh, doodle-luh, doo-doo ♪

Announcer: ladies and gentlemen, the weevils.

[Cheering and applause]

[Chord plays]

♪ It's been a barn day's night

♪ And we've been layin' 'round in the mud ♪

♪ It's been a barn day's night

♪ Yeah, we've been chewin' on our cud ♪

♪ But when the milkin' is done

♪ We set our udders on fun

♪ And start feelin' that it's all right ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Yeah, yeah.

[Camera clicks]

Pip: that night, the weevils played better

Than they ever played before...

Then broke up minutes later

After arguing over where to have dinner.

And where are they all now, you ask?

Otis went on to become a united states senator.

Abby became an f- fighter pilot.

Freddy and peck became co-anchors

Of a morning radio show in cleveland.

And pig's the lead singer of a successful boy band.

The end.

Well, guys, what do you think of my documentary?

Uh, hey, buddy, good job.

Except I'm fairly certain I'm not a u.s. Senator.

Yeah, and I'm not a fighter pilot.

And pig's not in any boy band.

Pig: hey guys, can you keep it down, please?

I'm trying to rehearse over here.

Ok, boys, from the top.

[Boy band style]: ♪ this little piggy went to market ♪

♪ This little piggy stayed home ♪

♪ This little piggy had roast beef ♪

♪ This little piggy had none

♪ And this little piggy cried

♪ Ooh, baby, ooh, baby ♪

♪ Funky baby...

Word.

[♪...]

Voice: [grunts] who put that there?

Mail call!

[Excited talking]

Whoo-hoo, my cheese of the month.

[Gasps]: my new barbell.

Pig: oh!

And my new issue of "cowsmopolitan".

"Cowsmopolitan", isn't that a chick magazine?

No, you're thinking of "chick magazine".

[Peeping and clucking]

Hey, what'd you get, freddy?

Let's see... Junk, jury duty.

Birthday card from parents I haven't seen in years... Junk.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you mean you haven't seen your parents in years?

How come? Huh?

No reason.

I don't have some deep dark secret

I've been keeping from you for years

If that's what you're thinking.

Stop looking at me.

[Screams]

Abby: aw, he must really miss his parents.

I wish there was something we could do.

Ooh!

Hey, we should just throw freddy a birthday party

And invite his parents.

That's a great idea, otis.

Their address is here on the card.

I'll write the invitation.

Pig, hold my barbell.

No, don't... Ooh, oh.

...i'll make the cake.

Man: one week later...

Freddy: come on, peck, what's going on?

Now, now, never mind.

Just a little further, fred.

A little further, and...

All: happy birthday, freddy!

You guys, you shouldn't have.

Don't be silly, freddy, you're family.

Oh, and speaking of family...

We invited your parents and they're gonna be here any minute.

[Horrified scream]

Wow, he really is surprised.

Otis, my parents cannotcome here.

You have to un-invite them.

Un-invite... What?

Freddy, they totally miss you.

They can't wait to see you.

[Sobbing]: no, you don't understand.

They're not like you and me.

Oh, now, everybody thinks their parents are a little weird, freddy.

Mine put ketchup on their hay.

Yeah, and mine think leprechauns are stealing their gold.

You see?

Pig's parents are stupid andcrazy.

Oh, you know it.

Oh, I can't wait to meet your parents, freddy.

Oh, I'm sure they can't wait to eat you.

"Meet" you, not eat you.

Eating you would be sick and wrong!

I got ferrets... Hillside.

[Screams]

[Panicked panting]

Peck: hey, fred, why are you putting me on the lawn mower...

Wha...!

[Tires screech] both: freddy.

Mom and dad.

Aw, how come we never group hug?

Pip: 'cause nobody wants to touch you.

You're shallow.

Oh, honey, we missed you so much.

Oh, it's really good to see you guys.

Freddy: well, don't be strangers, have a good trip back.

Don't forget to write.

Whoa, freddy, what are you doing?

They just got here.

You guys just stay as longas you want.

We made room in the silo.

We're not using it for anything else.

You want something to eat, you hungry, you're probably hungry right?

Gosh, no, we're just fine.

We stopped on the way and had some of mother's delicious fried chick...

"Chickelschmiffen."

Everybody loves mom's chickelschmiffen.

It's chock full of eggplant and soy paste and...

Well, enough chatting.

...let's get you settled in.

Hey, lets send out for chickelschmiffen.

Dad: I like your friends, son.

Can we eat them?herb!

Oh, he knows I'm just joshin', mother.

Freddy and I are chicken men all the way, isn't that right, son?

Oh, you know it, dad.

[Nervous laugh]

Well, I just never know with you two.

[Sniffs] rhode island red, paces.

Good work, mother.

I'll rush him, you grab his legs.

Wait, no!

Oof. Ow.

[Alarmed cluck]

Hm.

Son, what are you doing?

We almost had him.

Yeah, you don't want that chicken.

She's all dry and scrawny.

I have a special one picked out for us.

Ooh, a special one.

Did you hear that, mother?

That's my little gristle gobbling carnivore.

[Grunts]

[Gargling sound]

Hey, hey, who wants a tour of the barnyard?

Nobody.

We do. We do.

No, nobody.

[Frustrated sigh]

Otis: and over here is pig's stall.

It's not much to look at, and it also stinks.

Pip: you got that right.

The sheep stall...

Sheep: [bleating]: what's up?

Sheep : afternoon.

Freddy and peck's stall.

Peck, who's peck?

[Gulps]

Who's peck [chuckles]?

He's only your son's best friend.

Let's see, I think I heard him crowing around here somewhere.

Crowing? Growing.

Growing from all the sweet, delicious chickens we eat.

Peck's a rooster.eater.

A rooster-eater, just like me.

Peck: freddy!

[Screams] excuse me.

You dropped him on his head a lot

When he was a kid, didn't you? We sure did.

Constantly.

I'm back.

Now where are those parents of yours?

Peck: hey.

Balloony, balloony.

Peck: fred, what are you doing?

Aren't these balloons for your par... Whoa!

Freddy, freddy!

[Exhausted sigh]

Crisis averted.

Otis: and this is the henhouse.

[Screams]

Well, nowyou're talking.

Yes, we'll take it from here, otis.

[Freddy screams]

[Screaming continues...]

Run away, save yourselves.

Get out while you can.

[Clucking pandemonium]

[Exhausted sigh]

[Clucks] ow.

Otis: freddy, what are you doing?

You know I don't like letting the hens out

Where predators can eat them.

You're right, that would be terrible.

[Quietly]: terribly delicious.

Oh, why won't those predators

Leave our poor chick chicks alone?

...with us, so we can eat them.

'Cause you know how I love to eat chick...

Aye!

There he is, the cutest baby on the block.

All: aww...

Hey, freddy, what happened?

[All laughing]

Uh, otis, what's going on?

Oh, hey, freddy.

Your folks are giving us a little slide show of your family photos.

Dad: and here he is taking his first bath.

Pip: also his last.

[All laughing]

I can't believe you were worried about your parents, freddy.

Everybody loves 'em.

Oh, and here's all of us sitting down

To a traditional holiday dinner.

[Screaming]

[In slow motion]: no...

[Crashing]

[Freddy grunting... Crashing sounds]

[Panting]

Show's over, drive safe.

You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here.

Duke: unbelievable.abby: crazy ferret.

Pig: I want my money back.

Mr. And mrs. Ferret...

Would you excuse us for a minute?

All right, freddy, you got seconds to explain

Why you're acting like such a blockhead.

[Sighs] I should have known I couldn't keep it a secret any longer.

Thisis a traditional holiday dinner.

Yeah, so, it's just you and your folks sitting down

To a delicious meal of, ahh, roasted animal!

[Revolted sighing]

Now do you get it?

My parents are freakish, deviant meat eaters.

I can't believe it, they seem so nice.

Yeah, when they're not gorging on anything with gizzards and a beak.

That's why I've never told them about peck.

Hey, where is peck anyway?

Mr. And mrs. Ferret... Hi, I'm...

Oh, no need to tell us.

You're that "special" chicken freddy told us about.

Oh, well, I didn't realize...

Hey!

Guys, guys, have any of you seen peck?

He just left.

Just now with your "paarents".

What?

Oh, no.

[Frantic]: they're gonna put him in the oven

And baste him every minutes until golden brown.

[Delighted]: then a pinch of brown sugar to taste.

For crispier skin, try rotating halfway through cooking time, and for...

Uh, you wanna stop that?

I mean, we gotta save him!

How's it coming, mother?

Oh, he is such a dear.

Open up, hon.

Step away from the stew pot.

Well, hello, boys.

I'm just getting started on freddy's birthday dinner.

Ma'am, I'm gonna have to ask you for the rooster.

Whoa, heavens.

Oh, I guess otis likes his meat on the rare side.

[Gasps]

Oh-ho-ho, your parents are great, fred.

They were just giving me the most wonderful steam bath.

Actually peck, they were about to cook you and eat you.

Well, sure, they were about to go... Whoa!

With the cooking and the eating!

Son, why are you calling tonight's dinner, "peck"?

Guys, I have something to tell you.

Freddy...

It's ok, otis.

I'm done lying.

Mom, dad, peck isn't dinner.

He's my best friend.

And I'm not a voracious chicken-eater.

I'm a vegetarian!

[Gasps] [gasps]

And if you can't deal with that

Then I say "good day, sir...

And mrs. Sir."

[Sternly]: frederick, get over here right now...

[Warmly]: and give your old man a hug.

You're not ashamed of me?

Oh, honey, of course we are.

Ashamed and disgraced.

And don't forget humiliated.

We'll probably have to change our names.

And I'm sure our neighbors will pelt us with trash.

I know I would.

But as long as you're happy, dear

I guess we can learn to live with it.

I suppose we owe your friend an apology.

Sorry we almost ate you, peck.

Aw, I can't stay mad at you guys.

Group hug.

Ok, whoa, whoa and just whoa, hold up.

Your parents eat farm animals...

Your kid is a vegetarian.

Your best friend's parents just tried to eatyou...

And you're all cool with that?

Uh-huh. Yup.

Sure are. Pretty much.

Sweet, just checking.

Make some room in there, people, snugs all around.

[Pig singing...]

Huh?

All right, a group hug.

Scooch over, let me in there.

All: ow!

Peck: I can't feel my legs.

All: ♪ so happy birthday, freddy ♪

♪ Any many, many more

Abby: happy birthday, freddy.[Whooping and whistling]

Oh, thanks everyone.

This has been the best birthday ever.

And thanks for making us feel so welcome.

Don't mention it.

You guys can stay at the barnyard as long as you want.

Good, now let's eat.

All: whoo-hoo.

Mmm, sounds good.

It is getting... [Crunch]

Well, time to head out.

Yeah, we should get going.

Peck: good trip back.

Yeah, drive safe.

Pip: don't be strangers.

Abby: come back soon, you hear?

[Relieved sigh]

Man: o...

Squeaky voice: ...mation.

[♪...]