[chuckling]
[bluesy rock music]
♪ ♪
- [chuckling]
[slurps]
- [chuckles]
Hey, Beavis, how's that new soda?
- [slurping]
Ahh. [chuckling]
It's pretty good.
Yeah.
[slurping]
- Whoa.
Thirsty, Beavis? [both chuckle]
- Yeah. This stuff is really good.
Yeah.
[slurping]
Ahh.
[chuckling]
[growling, babbling]
- [chuckles] This is cool.
- [babbling]
[machine hissing]
[babbling]
Ahh. Ah.
I am Cornholio!
I need TP for my bunghole.
[babbling] - [chuckling]
- My bunghole will eat now.
Ah, ah, ah, ah. [jittering]
You must prepare a feast fit for the almighty bunghole.
[grill sizzling]
Would you like a spatula for your bunghole?
[door opens]
You must feed
the almighty bunghole. - Uhh, hey.
Uh, how can I, uh, help you this--tonight?
- ♪ The almighty ♪ - Hi, Immigration.
- ♪ Bungholio ♪ - Uh, what?
- [slowly] Immigration.
- ♪ Bungholio ♪ - Uhh--
- ♪ The almighty Bungholio ♪
- It has to be on the menu, sir.
- No, dumb ass.
I'm with Immigration.
- Really, where?
- I am Cornholio. - Listen, I work
for the government.
I'm just checking to see if there are
any illegal immigrants working here.
- Uhh--oh, you mean like Mexicans?
- Bunghole, Bungholio. [growling]
- What's with him?
What the hell language is he speaking?
- Uhh--hmm.
I don't know.
- Hey, you. Habla español?
- Español? Es bunghole.
Habla? [speaking gibberish]
- Hey, I'm talking to you.
Get back here! - [chuckles]
- [babbling]
- Hey, I'm talking to you. - EspañolFor my bunghole.
- I'm with the United States Department of Immigration.
Do you have any ID?
- Do you have any TP? TP for my bunghole?
- [speaking Spanish]
- [speaking Spanish, gibberish]
- Do you have a Green card?
- Are you threatening me?
- Yeah, maybe I am.
I'm with Immigration,
and if you don't show me some proof of residency,
I'm gonna have to take you in.
- You can take me, but you cannot take my bunghole.
[chuckles] For I have no bunghole.
I am the great Cornholio.
Where I come from there is no TP.
My people, we have but one bunghole.
- OK, so what do we know about this kid?
- I picked him up at Burger World.
But he doesn't have any ID or anything.
- [blabbering] - Says his name is "Cornholio."
- I am Cornholio. - The hell kind of a name
is that?
- Is that his first name or last?
- Mm, I don't know. It's the only name he gives.
- [gibberish]
- Cornholio? Sounds Spanish.
He could be Italian.
- The almighty Bungholio! - I doubt it.
- Well, the little bastard devoured my taco
and burrito combo on the ride over.
- Well, probably Mexican.
- Says he's from "Lake Titicaca."
- Lake Titicaca?
- Lake Titicaca. Titicaca.
- OK, find out where the hell lake Titicaca is.
- Ohh, Nicaragua!
- Nicaragua? - Agua for my bunghole.
Bunghole! - Oh, yeah, and he keeps
saying he needs, "TP for his bunghole."
- What the hell's a bunghole?
Will you find out what a bunghole is?
- You are a bunghole!
And so am I.
There will be more bungholes after me.
- Here, I got the dictionary.
- Bunghole. - "Bunghole"
Says, "a hole in a barrel or a keg
for pouring in or drawing out liquid."
- [speaking gibberish] Bunghole.
- This kid's messed up.
Just take him back to Mexico and drop him off
with the others.
Let the federales deal with him.
- OK, Cornholio, time to go back home.
- Are you threatening me?
You will give me TP, bunghole.
- Yeah, yeah, all right,
I know your bunghole needs TP.
We'll get you plenty of TP
just as soon as we get you back to Mexico.
And your bunghole will be just fine.
- I would hate for my bungholio to get polio.
- Me too.
Come on, OK.
This way, Cornholio.
- The bunghole, it is nothing to be ashamed of.
- A new report shows that illegal aliens
are crossing into the United States
at an all-time high.
The US-- - What a dumb ass.
- But for the few that are caught,
these illegal aliens are documented and then return
to Mexico only to try to cross again
in an ongoing and seemingly endless cycle.
- [chuckles]
- TP for his bunghole.
- [speaking Spanish] - [speaking Spanish]
- [speaking Spanish]
- Ahh. [chuckling]
Is this Nicaragua?
I will take this land for my bunghole.
Long live the almighty bunghole!
I am the great Cornholio.
There will be people for every man.
[Spanish guitar music]
My people, we have been without TP.
[chuckling]
No man should be without TP.
[coyote howls]
[Blues Traveler's "Run Around"]
♪ ♪
- He's playing a toy. [both chuckle]
- Whoa, check out that chick's panties!
- Damn it, Beavis. Don't talk to me
when a chick's panties are on TV.
It's like you mess up my mind, and I can't,
like, see the panties right. [chuckles]
- Oh, yeah, sorry. Yeah.
[both chuckle]
- ♪ I couldn't escape that memory of a phone call ♪
- Uh, I think this of Blues Traveler.
- No it's not. Where's that big, fat dude?
- I think that's him, Beavis.
I think he just, like, lost a lot of weight.
- Damn it. That pisses me off.
Everybody keeps getting skinny.
- Yeah, he looked better when he was
a big fat slob bouncing around on the stage going,
[flubbers lips]
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And his, like, stomach was hanging over his pants going,
[flubbers flips]
- Check it out, Beavis.
I'm fingering my lips.
[flubbers flips]
Big fat dude.
[flubbers]
[both chuckle]
- Yeah. Remember that cartoon
that had that big fat dude in it
and he used to go, "Hey, hey, hey."
- Oh, yeah, and then he had that friend
with his eyes cut out of his hat.
And he'd, like, go,
[flubbers lips] "Hey, baby,
let's go around." - Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah. See, they used to have cool cartoons.
Cartoons now just suck.
- Yeah.
- ♪ Sure-fire way to keep things up ♪
- Um, I don't think Dorothy was this hot in the movie.
- Chicks were all, like, ugly in olden times.
It was, like, really messed up.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
I guess that's why old dudes are, like,
all cranky and stuff.
They're, like, "Back in my day,
"you'd hardly ever get wood watching TV.
Oh, yeah, it was rough, uh-huh."
[both chuckling]
- Yeah. [chuckling]
[applause]
[bluesy rock music]
♪ ♪
07x02 - Vaya Con Cornholio
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Adult animated series follows Beavis and Butt-Head, both voiced by Judge, a pair of teenage slackers characterized by their apathy, lack of intelligence, lowbrow humor, and love for hard rock and heavy metal music.
Adult animated series follows Beavis and Butt-Head, both voiced by Judge, a pair of teenage slackers characterized by their apathy, lack of intelligence, lowbrow humor, and love for hard rock and heavy metal music.