07x25 - Garage Band

[bunniefuu]

[both snickering]

[rock music]

♪ ♪

- Just look at you.

You've done it all.

How did you get started?

- I just got a couple of my buds together

and we practiced in someone's garage.

And we picked our band name, played some local clubs.

- Rock on.

So what do you like most about being a rock star?

- Oh, partying with naked chicks, man.

- Whoa, heh-heh.

Hey, Beavis, we need to become a band.

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, yeah, I know, I know.

But you always say that, and then we get all excited

like we're going to start a band, and then we go outside,

and, you know, like, we just, like, heh,

start breaking stuff, and then it never happens.

Heh-heh-heh. - Uh, well, heh-heh,

we should do like that dude and just, like,

go hang out in a garage.

Heh-heh-heh. - Oh, yeah, yeah, heh-heh.

[clattering]

[grunting]

- Heh-heh-heh. - [grunting and snickering]

- Hey, hey, what--what is all this racket?

Oh, Beavis and Butt-Head.

Please don't kick my garage, okay?

- Uh, we need, like, a garage or something.

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, we wanna rock, yeah.

Heh-heh-heh. - We're gonna be a band.

Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh. - Ah, starting a garage band.

Great idea, guys.

Music can be a really positive outlet

for all your youthful energy.

Here, let me show you a couple of chords

on my guitar to help you get started.

Chords are the basis of all rock music, okay?

Now, this is an A chord.

You just put three fingers there and...

♪ ♪

[hums]

Isn't that nice?

- Uh, that sucks, heh-heh-heh.

- And here's a G.

♪ ♪ [hums]

- The G sucks, too, heh-heh-heh-heh.

- What the hell is this crap?

This isn't music.

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, really, heh-heh.

Where's the smoke machine, heh-heh, and the pyrotechnics?

Heh-heh. - [sighs]

Now, guys, it does take hard work

and practice to be a musician.

Well, I see you're eager to get started.

Why don't you jam out on a few chords?

I'll check back with you in a little bit.

Okay? Have fun.

- Um, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.

- Come on, dumbass, play it!

Heh-heh-heh. - Um, here, check this out.

Heh-heh, get that, heh, heh-heh.

Hey-ya!

[screams] [plays discordantly]

You're gonna die!

[imitating electric guitar]

- Whoa, heh-heh-heh.

That was cool, Beavis.

Heh-heh-heh. - Whoo, heh-heh-heh.

Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh-heh. - We're, like, on our way.

Heh-heh, heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, rock, heh-heh-heh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Heh-heh-heh.

Heh, rah!

Heh-heh-heh, yeah, heh-heh-heh.

[glass shattering]

[car engine rumbling]

- Heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh.

[imitating electric guitar] - Heh-heh-heh.

Heh, heh-heh-heh. - [imitating electric guitar]

- Heh-heh, heh-heh-heh.

- Heh. - Can I help you kids?

- Uh, we're, like, a band. Heh-heh-heh.

- Oh, you must have read the sign.

But what do you play?

- Uh, we're, uh, a band?

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, yeah, heh-heh, yeah.

Check this one out, heh.

[imitating electric guitar]

Heh, yeah, heh-heh-heh.

- All right.

I'm kind of new to this.

What's the name of your band?

- Uh, uh, heh-heh. - Um, heh, um, heh-heh-heh.

- You mean, like, AC/DC?

Heh-heh-heh. - Oh, yeah, yeah, or, heh.

Or Metallica, yeah, yeah. Heh, that's a cool name.

- Metallica.

Oh, that has a nice ring to it.

And what are your names?

- Um, heh-heh, Beavis.

Heh-heh-heh. - Uh, heh-heh, Butt-Head.

Heh-heh-heh.

- Metallica featuring Beavis and Nut-Head.

- Uh, no.

Heh-heh-heh. - Okay,

you kids got yourself a concert.

See you tonight.

- Yes!

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, yeah, heh-heh-heh.

[imitating air guitar]

Cool, heh-heh-heh.

We're Metallica, featuring Beavis and Butt-head.

Heh-heh-heh, yeah, yeah, heh.

- Uh, that doesn't sound right.

It should be, like, Butt-Head and Beavis.

Beavis and Butt-Head sounds stupid.

Heh-heh. - Oh, yeah, yeah, heh.

No, no, heh.

I kind of like Beavis and Butt-Head, yeah, heh.

I don't know, it just sounds right, heh-heh-heh-heh.

- Damn it, Beavis, this is my band.

My name comes first.

Don't you, like, want to be a hit?

Heh-heh-heh. - No way!

Heh, if you hit me, I'm gonna kick you in the nads!

- Yeah, try it and I'll b*at the living crap out of you.

Heh-heh.

Damn it, this band isn't working.

It's like, we don't, like, uh, communicate or something?

Heh-heh-heh. - Um, heh, what?

Heh-heh-heh.

- Uh, I don't know, what? Heh-heh.

- Oh, what the hell are you talking about?

- Uh, I don't know.

You're just a butt-knocker, heh-heh-heh.

- Don't call me a butt-knocker, you son of a bitch!

Heh-heh-heh-heh.

- This band sucks.

I'm gonna get out of here.

Heh-heh.

- Heh, oh, yeah, yeah, heh.

Yeah, I'm gonna get out of here.

This sucks. Heh-heh-heh-heh.

[horns honking]

[crowd hooting]

- Okay, simmer down, and why don't you all just behave?

- Where's Metallica? - [whistling]

- Okay, quiet, shush.

Now, Metallica should be here at any moment now.

I don't know exactly what the problem is,

but--but I talked to Metallica and--and Nut-Head,

and they were here in the hotel.

[quiet rock music]

- Well, now that it's all over,

I don't miss the band or the money.

I miss the chicks.

- Heh-heh, what a wuss.

- Heh-heh, remember, like, when we were a band,

you know, heh-heh, back in the day?

Heh-heh-heh-heh.

- Uh, you mean, like, today?

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, heh.

We rocked, heh-heh.

We had money and naked chicks,

and people would come up to us and say,

"Hey, man, how's it going?

Yeah, heh-heh, you guys are great."

Heh-heh. - Uh,

what the hell are you talking about, Beavis?

That didn't happen.

Heh-heh-heh. - Heh.

Oh, yeah, yeah, heh, yeah, it didn't, did it? Heh.

- I wouldn't worry, just, you know,

play it easy, calm down, and--

hey, no, get--get off the stage, okay?

Oh, ow! [mic feedback]

[impact thuds] Ow, ow, ow, ooh!

[heavy metal music] Okay, hey, oh!

Ow, get down!

[Soundgarden's "Black Hole Sun" plays]

- It is in these hills that Juan Valdez

and his trusty goat gather coffee beans every morning.

Heh-heh, heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh, yeah, heh-heh.

- Heh-heh-heh. - ♪ In my eyes ♪

♪ Indisposed ♪

♪ In disguises no one knows ♪ - Heh-heh-heh.

- Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh.

- Look at that guy's face.

Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh, yeah.

Heh-heh-heh.

I can make a face like that.

Check this out. - Heh.

- Heh-heh.

- Hm, heh-heh, heh-heh-heh-heh.

Um, that wasn't very good, Butt-Head.

[screams]

- Whoa, heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh.

That was scary, man, heh-heh.

- Yeah, that scared the bejesus out of me.

Heh-heh-heh. - Yeah, heh-heh.

Aww. - Yeah.

Heh-heh-heh. - Hm-hm-heh-heh-heh-heh.

- Aww, uh, heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh.

- Heh-heh-heh-heh, heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh-heh.

- ♪ Black hole sun, won't you come ♪

- Black hole sun, heh-heh-heh.

Black hole?

- Heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh, hole?

- Heh-heh-heh. - Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.

- Black hole?

Heh-heh-heh. - Um, heh.

Hey, Butt-Head, what is a black hole?

Heh-heh-heh. - Uh,

it's sort of like a bunghole,

but it's like in outer--

- Whoa, Butt-Head, check it out,

that's that chick from Whale, remember?

That hobo-slumping hobo slut, um, heh, remember?

- Shut up, Beavis, I was explaining something!

Heh-heh-heh. - Oh, oh, okay, heh.

- So, like, the black hole is like

this giant bunghole in outer space.

Heh-heh-heh. - Oh, yeah, heh-heh.

- That's, like, it sucks up the whole universe.

And then it's, like, it grinds it up and, like,

sends it all to hell or something.

Heh-heh-heh. - Whoa, really?

Heh-heh, that's cool. Heh-heh-heh.

So like, um, how do you know all this stuff?

- From watching "Star Trek," bunghole.

Heh-heh-heh. - Oh, yeah, yeah, heh-heh.

[rock music]

♪ ♪