02x05 - What If... Captain Carter Fought the Hydra Stomper?

Episode transcripts for the TV show "What If...?". Aired: August 11, 2021 to present.*
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Reimagining famous events from the films in the MC Universe.
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02x05 - What If... Captain Carter Fought the Hydra Stomper?

Post by bunniefuu »

[ROARS]

[SCREECHES]

Thanks, Cap.

What are new friends for?

- Nice.
- Little trick I picked up in Berlin.

Uh-huh. Watch this.

[GRUNTS]

Where did that move come from?

Oh, that? You know, Moscow.
I had a strange childhood.

[GRUNTING]

So, Cap, what's the plan?

Hawkeye, Wasp, I want eyes in the sky.

Iron Man, Thor, keep
the fighting down here.

Widow, let's go for a ride.

I like it.

[GRUNTS]

[PEGGY GRUNTS]

- ROMANOFF: Hey.
- [GASPS]

- LOKI: Hmm.
- Nice hat.

PEGGY: You go high, I go low?

Or we could just punch him a whole lot.

Hmm. He does have a very punchable face.

THE WATCHER: Time.

Space.

Reality.

It's more than a linear path.

It's a prism of endless possibility,

where a single choice can
branch out into infinite realities,


creating alternate worlds
from the ones you know.


I am the Watcher.

I am your guide through
these vast new realities.


Follow me and ponder the question...

"What if?"

I don't do sequels.

Normally.

What's the point of revisiting the story

when there are infinite
stories to be told?

But then, not every universe
is home to a Captain Peggy Carter,

the super-soldier,
the hero of World w*r II,

a woman quite literally
ahead of her time.

But there is only one Peggy Carter
that I would call my friend.

She and the [CHUCKLES]

Guardians of the Multiverse
saved all of existence.

I returned the heroes
to their own worlds,

the exact moments they left.

Peggy, though, she thought
her story was over,

but it was only just beginning.

Hey, lovely. Need a lift?

You know, you could join
me one of these mornings.

Running in circles has
never been my style.

Besides, Fury has a mission for us.

Think of it as extra cardio.

[SIGHS] Oh, man.

You need more hobbies.

[ENGINE REVS]

ROMANOFF: I found
what the pirates were after.

Peggy, you might wanna brace yourself.

PEGGY: I can promise you, Nat,

this won't be the strangest thing
that I've dealt with today.

ROMANOFF: Famous last words.

PEGGY: The HYDRA Stomper?

ROMANOFF: Yeah.

And there's someone inside.

Steve?

[POWERING UP]

Whoa, Peg.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Not Steve. More like RoboCop.

PEGGY: Robo-what?

ROMANOFF: You haven't seen
that? We'll rent it. Solid movie.

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

Oh, Steve...

Peg, we gotta go.

- PEGGY: You told me Steve d*ed.
- FURY: He did.

- On a mission in Argentina.
- FURY: He did.

- In 1953!
- He did.

After the w*r, Rogers and Barnes
formed their own two-man army

and destroyed every HYDRA base on Earth.

Until the last mission
claimed Steve's life.

Well, I have bruises that say otherwise.

[SIGHS] There's been rumors

about the HYDRA Stomper's
survival since the 1960s.

The 1960s?

Why wasn't I debriefed on this?

Because we didn't debrief you
on Bigfoot either.

- Wait. What?
- FURY: Look, Carter,

if the stories are true, then the
HYDRA Stomper is responsible

for some of the world's
worst acts of terror,

which cost the lives
of dozens of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents,

including friends of mine.

Fury, Steve would never do that.

He would if the Red Room was in control.

What are you saying?

It was rumored that her old home

found and housed the HYDRA Stomper.

You knew about this,
and you didn't tell me?

Didn't see the point
in breaking your heart twice.

The HYDRA Stomper was
on that boat for a reason.

Tech Ops decoded
the ship's transmissions.

We have a lead on its next mission.

Good. I'll lead a strike team.

Have a full medical crew
on standby for Rogers.

We don't know how long
he's been in that suit.

It might be better for you
to sit this fight out.

I'm Peggy Carter, and we're
talking about Steve Rogers.

Even if only one tenth
of those rumors are true,

it still makes the Stomper
the world's most dangerous k*ller.

I have a shield.

A shield ain't gonna stop him.

Peg, the Steve Rogers
that you loved d*ed in 1953.

That thing, it's not human.

What's the HYDRA Stomper's mission?

SINGH: Secretary of State Barnes...

Bucky, if you'll permit me.

Surely you understand that the Sokovian

aid package is generous considering...

Considering it doesn't cover
hospitals, schools or new roads?

Fix it. I won't have a country
torn apart by civil w*r

because we didn't do the right thing.

Right away, sir.

Mr. Secretary, we need
to move you to a secure location.

What's going on?

Sir, we believe there might be
an attempt on your life.

Okay, I may be an old man, boys,

but I've punched Nazis
and shared beers with aliens.

I can handle myself.

Get down! Get down!

[GRUNTS]

Quick! Get him out of here!

RUMLOW: Move, move, move!

FURY: I want jets in the sky.

Natasha, I need you out there.

You have the green
light to sh**t it down.

Lethal force, sir?

That thing is an international t*rror1st

attempting to assassinate a US official.

I'm trusting you to do the right thing.

RUMLOW: Come on, come on!
Get the secretary to the roof!

Who is in the suit?

Bucky, it's Steve.

- Steve?
- Steve's in the suit.

- Alive.
- Well, that's a different kettle of cod.

What's powering it?
It's not the Tesseract.

Hmm. Something Howard
cooked up after the w*r.

Probably a mix of plutonium and pomade.

Well, good. That means I can break it.

[GROUND THUDDING]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTING]

[g*n f*ring]

[GASPS]

RUMLOW: Come on, come on!
Let's go! Move, move!

SOLDIER: Incoming! Fall back! Come on!

Damn it! Down, down! Go down!

[PANTING]

Argh! Come on!

Damn it! Get down! Get down!

Sir, I'm locked in on the target.
Weapons hot.

Widow, no!

- ROMANOFF: Permission to sh**t?
- Ah!

What? Secretary! Down!
Please get down, sir!

No. No. Steve would be stupid
enough to do the same for me.

Steve, hey.

Sir, I don't have a clean sh*t.

Secretary Barnes is in my line of fire.

Stand down! Stand down!

Come on, man. It's me. It's Bucky.

Remember me?

- This ain't you.
- [PANTING]

Let's get a drink. Like the old days.

What do you say, buddy?

You and me.

[SIGHS]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTING]

Carter. Clear out, Carter. Move.

No! He is mine.

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTS]

[CLANGS]

[GRUNTS] Steve!

[GROANS]

Ha!

Come back, Steve! Steve!

Steve, wake up.

ROMANOFF: Hey, Peg. I got you.

Ha! Widow.

Bring him in. Ground's
coming pretty fast.

- [GRUNTS]
- Peg?

- [GRUNTS]
- Peg?

- Peg?
- [GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS] We're in!

ROMANOFF: Come on. Come on, come on.

Good luck, Carter.

Thank you.

What can I say, Peg? I'm...

I'm a sucker for a good love story.

Welcome to St. Kilda, Scotland.

- Never heard of it.
- Exactly.

Neither has S.H.I.E.L.D.
We'll be safe here.

PEGGY: He's barely aged.

ROMANOFF: He can thank
the suit for that.

Not only is this thing
preserving his good looks,

it's the only thing keeping him alive.

You can't remove it?

Not unless you want to put him
straight into a coffin.

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

His suit's rebooting now.

We'll see who's at the controls
when he wakes up.

PEGGY: What is that?

ROMANOFF: All out of
scotch. So, you know.

[CLEARS THROAT]
According to these readouts,

with each activation, the odds
of Steve's survival plummets.

No wonder the Red Room
deployed him sparingly.

No fun playing Russian roulette
with biotech, huh?

[SPEAKING RUSSIAN]

- Speaking of tech, what if we...
- No.

- Well, if not Stark, then Banner?
- No.

Unplugging it and plugging it
back in is not gonna work.

- We need help.
- No.

We don't have time for Banner
and Stark to play mad scientist.

After today, every government
on the planet is hunting Steve.

Best-case scenario,

he winds up stuck in some prison,
frozen in carbonite.

"Frozen in carbonite"?

So that's how you spend
your Saturday nights.

- We'll go to the Red Room.
- What?

I've never been a woman to quit a fight.

The Red Room did this.

If there's a cure, it'll be there.

You know, I always wondered

how you got all those G.I. boys
to follow a woman into w*r.

- Question answered.
- Are you with me or not, Widow?

Before I joined S.H.I.E.L.D.,

I spent five days in a Hungarian sewer

tracking down and k*lling
the head of the Red Room.

Are you certain you k*lled him?

I mean, I stabbed him in the
carotid artery with a corkscrew.

So, yeah, I think I did.

- You should write a memoir.
- Or, like, a how-to manual.

But, at the end of the day,
it meant nothing.

The Red Room survived
because its location is secret.

No one can find it.
Not even S.H.I.E.L.D.

- Sorry.
- ROGERS: I can take you.

- Steve.
- Peggy, that's not Steve.

It's been a while, Peggy.
I owe you that date.

Steve.

ROGERS: Not too far from the Red Room.

- PEGGY: Where are we?
- ROGERS: A Sokovian m*llitary base.

Until the '90s, it was a
training camp for KGB spies.

When the Kremlin abandoned it,
the Red Room moved in.

The KGB built it

to look like an American town straight
out of a John Mellencamp song.

- He's a rock 'n' roll musician.
- Oh, I know.

Barton introduced me to dad rock.

ANIMATRONIC MAN: Business is booming.
Don't you know it?


It's a great day in the neighborhood.

ANIMATRONIC WOMAN:
Baseball and apple pie.

ANIMATRONIC MAN: You smell that air?
That's the smell of freedom.


WOMAN: Well, hi there, neighbor.
[CHUCKLES] I love America.

I feel like I'm in a horror movie.

And we once fought a giant space squid.

I signaled the Red Room.

Told them I had mechanical issues
and to send a transport.

We have a little time.

[INHALES] That's a first.

[CHUCKLES]

Okay.

Uh, I'm gonna go find
a lemonade stand or something.

ROGERS: I don't remember much.

When I was awake,
the suit was in control.

It was like watching the world
through fogged glass.

PEGGY: I stepped through a door.

In one breath, the w*r was
over and the future was here.

So, what do you think of the future?

In a word, faster.

Cars. Computers. Even
the news moves fast.

And, uh, the dancing?

Still slow.

ANIMATRONIC MOM: It's a baby!

You could've had that, after the w*r.

A wife, kids, the whole white
picket fence life. Barnes did.

Hmm.

- Good for him.
- Steve...

I didn't see much point,
unless it was with you.

I spent years going after HYDRA.

As long as I was on a mission,
I could pretend you weren't gone.

- It's crazy.
- No, not crazy.

Very human, actually.

But you're here now.

Finally.

- Ah!
- Peggy!

Widow Bites. Packs a sting. [GRUNTS]

It's a baby!

You've got to be kidding me.

Who wants apple pie?

Special milk delivery!

[GRUNTS]

ANIMATRONIC MAN: Special delivery!
Special delivery!


HOUSEWIFE: I love shopping.

Who wants apple pie?

I just love shopping.

[ROGERS GRUNTS]

WOMAN: Lovely weather.

MAN: Here's the milk!
Special milk delivery!


WOMAN: I love shopping.

MAN: Special delivery! Special delivery!

You forgot to mention
these robots aren't very nice.

ROGERS: Sorry. My memory's
a little fuzzy.

Russia thought America was like this?

We didn't get cable TV over here, so...

[POWERS DOWN]

Steve, no!

[GROANS]

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

[GROANS]

[PANTS]

- Is that the infamous Red Room?
- Yeah. Home sweet home.

I think I can see my bedroom from here.

MELINA: Oh, I'm sorry, Natasha.

But we turned your bedroom into a gym.

Melina.

Report, soldier.

- [POWERING UP]
- ROGERS: Mission accomplished, ma'am.

What did you do to him?

Oh. He's happier this way.

No regret. No loss.

Only me and his mission.

What did he mean by
"mission accomplished"?

Barnes is still alive.

Oh, Natasha, so you believe
you "rebooted" him?

That is strange.

You never struck me as a child

foolish enough to buy into fantasy.

All right, you can say, "I told you so".

Later. I don't wanna fight
in front of my mom.

- Mum?
- Ish.

Let's unpack that later, shall we?

MELINA: I needed to lure you away

from the Avengers and S.H.I.E.L.D.

And now you're mine.

But this was all a trap?

The ship, Steve, to find me?

Okay, now I might say it.

You are Captain Margaret Carter,

the epitome of womanhood and science.

I don't know whether to kiss you,
k*ll you or dissect you.

Let me guess. Maybe all three?

Yes. Good plan.

Even in Russia, little girls dream

of growing up to be Captain Carter.

All my widows have seen your movie.

There was a movie?

It was a musical.

You can both surrender
and come willingly, or...

[MELINA CHUCKLES]

Oh, it's very refreshing to meet a hero

who surpasses their reputation.

Get her.

[PEGGY GRUNTS]

Hey, sisters.

How you girls doing?

Okay.

[GRUNTS]

I see we still have
some issues to iron out.

Steve, this isn't you.

[GRUNTS] You're Steve Rogers.

[CRASHES]

[GRUNTS]

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

[PANTING]

[GRUNTS]

PEGGY: Steve, this isn't you.

Wake up.

[GROANS]

[METAL CREAKING]

[PANTING]

[GRUNTS]

PEGGY: It's me, Steve. It's Peggy.

You owe me a date.

[g*ns f*ring]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTS]

[GROANS]

[GRUNTS]

MELINA: Ingrid, straighten your back.

Good.

Harder. Hit her harder!

Agnesa, aim for her left knee.

She damaged it in bicycle
accident in third grade.

[GROANS]

MELINA: Yes, good work.

[ALL GRUNTING]

[SCREAMS]

[GASPS]

[GROANING]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

I don't wanna fight you.

[GROANING]

This isn't us.

I am done fighting, Steve. [PANTS]

[PANTING]

I've been fighting for so long.
To end the w*r.

To forget what I lost. I'm, I'm tired.

MELINA: I was proud of you.

You were a very successful
k*lling machine.

But then you became an Avenger.

Sorry to disappoint you.

Steve, I want to be with you.

Even if this is the end.

I want you.

Oh, no.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Steve, I can't, I can't lose you again.

Wait, wait.

Wait. No. Steve! Steve. No!

[GROANS]

[GROANS]

[GRUNTS]

[MELINA SCREAMING]

Stop, stop, stop!

[PANTING]

Nat. Nat. Are you all right?

ROMANOFF: [GRUNTS] No.

- We need to run.
- [GROANS] Of course we do.

THE WATCHER: Not exactly a happy ending,

but then again, this isn't
the end of her story.


[CAR BEEPS]

Does Stark know you're stealing his car?

I thought I'd go out.
It's Friday night, after all.

Without saying goodbye?

Steve's out there somewhere.

And I know you don't believe
he can be saved, but I do.

I have to.

Okay.

Let's hit the road.

I am the Watcher.

I see all, I observe all, I know...

What the hell is this?

- Hey! Natasha!
- Peg!

Peggy? Peg!

Where are you?

That's a good question.

[GASPS]

That is she?

The one who can save our queen?

More.

She will save our world.

[GROANS] So much for taking a night off.

Watcher? Watcher?

[EERIE MUSIC PLAYING]
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