DAGWOOD: Uh-uh, uh-uh.
Don't touch that dial.
Blondie!
[♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]
We can catch
the 8:52 into Sheraton City,
and be there
by the time the store opens.
Please, Blondie.
It's their 25th
anniversary sale,
and everything is going
for half price or less.
-[GRUNTS]
-Dagwood?
[CHUCKLES] I'll tell him.
What can he do? He'll holler.
Okay. Good night.
-Dear, are you asleep?
-Not anymore.
Stacy's Department Store
is having
their 25th anniversary sale,
so Harriet and I are going.
-Hmm. You're going, huh?
-Mm-hmm. Yes. On the 8:52.
Hmm.
What for?
Well, I just told you,
it's their 25th anniversary.
Send them a nice telegram.
[♪♪♪]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
This is stupid.
What you staging it in here for?
Because a flatfoot
had me tabbing.
If he finds it on me,
we go back to cam.
-Did we lose him?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shh.
Snap it up, snap it up. Come on.
What's the matter?
Don't you trust me?
Oh, sure, sure.
I'll leave it, this is money.
Now, I'll tell you what to do.
You find that flatfoot,
let him tail you, lose him,
and then I'll meet you
on the train.
Sure you will.
Let him tail you,
and I'll meet you on the train!
Whoa!
Oh, no!
Sorry!
-Let's go! We're sorry.
-Aren't you gonna help us?
-Would you have a peanut?
-Well, that's not mine, fella.
Well, neither,
this ain't mine either.
You dropped it, remember?
I've never seen
this package before in my life.
Oh, yes, you did.
Would you mind telling me
the name of the game?
Oops, I'm sorry, my friend,
I gotta go.
-Just a moment, Gunter Pauli.
-I beg your pardon?
An umbrella champ.
Don't you guys remember me?
The name is Riley.
I sent you up for ten years
for that payroll heist.
By the way, uh, whatever
happened to that 50 grand?
-Is this it? Is it all here?
-Oh, please, Riley.
Give us a break.
We just got out yesterday.
Don't I know that?
I've been on your tail
every minute since.
You know what?
I had a feeling that you guys
would make a bee line for this.
May I drop dead, Riley,
if I'm not going straight.
Also me too, Riley.
-Straight as a thigh, honest.
-I bet you are.
Straight back to San Quentin.
Well, but that's life.
[CHUCKLES]
Only I'll be in on your way
back in again today.
Oh, but I'm clean.
You never found that on me.
Oh, neither on me either.
Well, neither one
of you owns it.
Suppose we'd take
a little peek, huh?
Hold this.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
-It's liver.
-Liver?
Yeah, but whose?
Well, I guess
you guys are clean.
But remember, the eyes of Riley
are upon you.
Yeah, sure.
-I thought he had us cold.
-Yeah. Also, me too.
Fifty grand for a slab of liver?
-It's getting switched on us.
-Come on.
-Where did they go? What train?
-How should I know what train?
Let's take this.
It must've flown off
-in one of their packages.
-You and your screwy ideas.
Why'd you have to stash
the money in there for?
Come on, here's his house.
Let's go!
Listen, how do you know
it's from what pocket?
How do you know
it didn't fall off
somebody else?
Patience, patience.
I have your liver
here somewhere.
Uh. Uh. Uh. No, you don't.
That's my new girdle, silly.
Uh. Uh. Uh. Hmm? Not mine.
Must be Harriet's.
Must be Harriet's too.
Blondie?
Oh. I took one of your packages
by mistake.
-Have you got mine?
-Oh, there they are.
Oh. Hello, sweetie.
Oh, wait a minute.
Isn't that yours too?
-No.
-That's funny.
Oh, maybe
that's the pup's liver.
No, that isn't it.
It must be yours.
-Well, let's open and see.
-Of course. [CHUCKLES]
Money!
-Real money!
-I didn't buy any money!
[EXHALES] Neither did I!
[BOTH LAUGH]
MR. DITHERS: And my sixth
and final reason
for not giving you a raise is,
you're not worth it.
But, Mr. Dithers,
if you'll only listen.
I haven't finished yet.
-But, Mr. Dithers...
-Don't but me, Bumstead.
-Put 'em down.
-[GRUNTS]
-There.
-Give me one good reason
why I should give
you more money.
-Because I need it.
-I said a good reason.
-Uh.
-[TELEPHONE RINGING]
-Yes?
-BLONDIE: Is Dagwood there?
No, this is not Bumstead.
If you want Bumstead,
why don't you call him
in his office?
-I'm right here, Mr. Dithers.
-Huh?
-[CHUCKLES]
-Oh!
BLONDIE: This is Blondie,
Mr. Dithers.
-Oh. Hello, Blondie.
-BLONDIE: You better sit down.
-I'm not tired.
-BLONDIE: Sit down, I said.
And don't be all day about it.
-I'm sitting.
-Now, hold on to your chair.
-We're rich, filthy rich!
-Filthy, dirty rich! [SQUEALS]
Beyond the dreams
of... of Croesus.
Who? What?
Come right home,
and help us count this.
-What? Count what?
-The money. Isn't it wonderful?
Well... Hello? Hello, Blondie?
-Blond... She hung up on me.
-Sensible girl.
Hmm. Yeah, but all that stuff
about money.
Money? What money?
I don't know,
that's what I gotta find out.
She even said I didn't even need
my job anymore.
-Hmm?
-She said we were rich.
-Rich?
-Rich as Croesus.
-Who? Who's Croesus?
-He's a fella with a rich ass.
Uh-huh. Well, my boy,
what are you standing here for?
-Huh?
-No woman should be left alone
-with money.
-Yeah, yeah. What money?
Well, any money.
Especially if it's cash.
Now, you run along home,
and see that everything
-is all right.
-Oh, yes, sir.
Oh, and, uh, call me back
and tell me how much there is.
How much what?
-Money, you BB brain.
-Hmm.
Fifty one hundred dollar bills,
that's, uh, how much?
Fifty times a hundred,
that's fifty hundred.
-Isn't it?
-Is it?
Well, let's see how many fifty.
Blondie, Blondie!
Are you all right?
-Oh, my, money! Is it real?
-How much is fifty hundred?
Well, w... where did you get it?
Whose is it?
-Well, I suppose it's ours.
-That's right. It's "ours."
-Of course, I found it.
-Yeah, but I helped you find it.
Well, yes, but--
Yeah, well, uh,
let's split for it. [CHUCKLES]
Heads, it's all yours,
tails, it's all ours.
-Okay.
-[LAUGHS]
-No, wait a minute.
-Huh?
Uh. We can't split
a thousands of dollars
-that don't belong to us.
-Hmm.
Maybe we should return it.
Uh. Maybe
you're right, Blondie.
Oh, sure.
Blondie, walks up to somebody
on the street,
and says "Excuse me, but did you
lose 50,000 dollars?"
-Hmm.
-Oh, brother.
Don't you think we could get
used to having it
around the house?
BLONDIE:
Well, now. Look, the money
must belong to somebody,
doesn't it?
What's the idea, Harriet?
And what's with all these
gibberish about money!
Whoo! What music! Well?
Now, you got all this money,
what are you gonna do
with it, eh?
-Oh, I--
-Don't answer that,
-I got a deal for ya.
-Eh. Huh?
Oh, and you'll love
this deal, Dagwood.
I'm your friend.
I've never steered
you wrong, have I?
Well, no, but--
Don't ask me what this deal
is all about,
because I haven't thought
one up yet.
-Uh-huh.
-But when I do,
you're gonna love it.
It's half ours, Herb.
Shut up, darling.
This is business.
Ours? The deal is off.
Hundreds.
Violins and woodwinds. [LAUGHS]
That's half ours too.
Well, well, and well.
How much is in there?
Well, twenty-six thousand
when I counted it.
It was almost 30,000.
Trying to dip us already, eh?
Well, it's more like
Well, that's a good
round number, 50,000.
-We'll just take our half and--
-Now, just a minute, Herb.
Blondie thinks
we should return this money.
-We will not!
-Nobody ever returns money!
-A deal is a deal!
-Yeah...
Certainly. What did we sell?
-Nothing.
-Nothing?
Well, where did we get all this?
-I found it.
-"We" found it, dear. "We."
What's the matter?
Can't you ever do
anything by yourself?
[GRUNTS] You know,
whoever lost this money
-is gonna be looking for it.
-Yeah. [CHUCKLES] High and low.
-So, we've got to give it back.
-Blondie's right, Herb.
Isn't that enough
that we found the money?
do we have to find him too?
Well, it might be some
poor, little, old widow.
I should be
such a poor, little, old widow.
[CHUCKLES] Me too.
Yes. Wouldn't you
just love that?
Hmm. And now you see, Herb,
what all this money
-is already doing to us?
-Yes.
But just the same,
it would be nice to have it.
We already have it.
Let's not get
sentimental about this.
-But maybe there's a reward.
-Yeah, probably a reward.
-Reward?
-Yeah.
Well, it's only
a measly ten percent,
-that's only 5,000 dollars.
-Hmm.
No, we'll keep the money
and they can keep the reward.
-Hmm.
-Who do they think I am?
Well, they can't do this to me.
-What gall, a measly...
-[DOGS BARKING]
...five thousand dollars.
I'll get my half,
and you can return your half.
No, no, wait, wait,
wait a minute, Herb.
Wait a minute!
If... if I return our half,
whoever it is, will wanna know
where the other half is,
and I will have to tell 'em.
You would, you blabbermouth.
But who do
we return it to, dear?
We don't even know
where the money came from.
-We don't even know who lost it.
-Or if it is lost!
Yeah. Well, it's lost,
and we're taking it
-to the police.
-The police?
That's the last place
in the world to take it.
-Why?
-Because they'll find the owner!
Well, naturally!
But if they don't claim it
in six months,
it belongs to us,
that's the law.
Six months? And lose
all that lovely interest?
Let's put it in the bank...
-Oh.
-...in a joint account,
-of course.
-Eh. But...
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
-[DOG BARKING]
I'll see who it is.
[DOG BARKING]
How are you doing, ma'am?
Is this yours?
My liver! Oh, thank you!
Why you're the men
at the station.
Yes. It seems
we exchanged parcels,
so will you give us ours?
Oh, it was...
it was your money?
Yes, buddy, yes.
Now, where is it?
Well, we were just
about to take it to the police.
-What?
-Oh, most commendable, most--
I told you we had
no cause for worry.
Is it nice to know
that we still have
honest people in the world?
Now, about that reward,
after all,
five thousand dollars
isn't nearly enough.
-"Five thousand dollars"?
-[GROANS]
There was 50 grand in that pack.
-[GRUNTS]
-Herbert!
-Eh. Excuse me? All right...
-Now, where is it?
Uh. Well,
i... it is right there.
Hey. It... it's gone.
-It was here just a minute ago.
-Yeah, well, where did it go?
Hey... [WHIMPERS]
The thing is
the hard way to get that--
-How dare you!
-Lady, it's our money.
You don't mind
if we wish to have it returned.
-Oh.
-No fuss, no bother.
Now, who has it?
Eh. Huh?
Come, darling.
I think we'd better be going.
Halt, one, two!
[EXHALES] We only live
right next door,
and I assure you that I--
Nobody leaves here, but nobody.
And that goes for you too.
[BARKS]
[♪♪♪]
My beautiful home! Oh!
It just doesn't make sense.
None of us left this room!
Then it's in here.
-Suppose we get with it.
-I won't lift a finger.
-I'm glad it's gone.
-Don't be a wise guy, lady.
[GASPS] Oh, how dare you!
-[ARTIE GROANS]
-Oh!
Don't get out of line, lady.
TOP COAT: Easy, Artie. Easy.
Easy? It's our 50 grand
they've got!
Please, Blondie,
you might make 'em mad.
Oh, let me go, let me go!
Are you just gonna sit here,
and let them wreck our home?
We're gonna sit here
very quietly.
Why? They're nothing,
but thieves and murderers!
-[EXHALES]
-That's why.
All right, fat stuff.
Hurry it up.
You leave him alone!
Hey, hey, hey. Shut up, darling.
-Find that dough.
-Yes, sir.
Oh.
If I were only a man,
a fine husband you make.
Shut up, darling.
This is no time to be brave,
and make like a hero.
You don't deserve
a wife like me!
I don't deserve my arthritis
either, but I got it.
Hey, Mother, we're home!
Whoops. Company.
-Guess I'll be going on home.
-Hold it, kid.
If you hurt my children--
Lady, we don't wanna
hurt anybody.
All we want is our money.
-Hey, come here!
-Mother, Daddy! Who are they?
Don't worry honey,
they won't harm you.
-What do they want?
-Money, kid.
You already swiped
Fifty grand?
And you let her
get away with it?
She's trying.
Now shut up, kid.
Some money you got there.
-[GROANS]
-Listen, just a minute.
Now, you stay in character, sir.
You're a coward, remember?
-If you didn't have that g*n...
-Yes, but I do.
You don't look so tough.
He is, kid. Believe me.
I'm a sissy compared to him.
Yeah. If my pop got mad,
he could take both of you on.
-Couldn't you, Pop? Huh?
-Oh. [LAUGHS]
-That's my boy.
-Interesting.
-[CHUCKLES]
-Yeah. Come on.
Both of you, get over there,
and do your homework.
What are they gonna
think of next?
A truant officer with a g*n.
And you girly, get over there
with them.
And you two, over there.
All right, kids. On the floor,
and start studying.
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
-My, you have a lot of children?
-Uh. Yeah.
-[DOGS BARKING]
C... can I get it? [EXHALES]
-Sure.
-Thank you.
-Get rid of whoever it is.
-Yeah.
Oh. It's Mr. Dithers.
-Who?
-Dithers.
-Dithers?
-Yeah, my boss, I work for him.
Tell him to b*at it.
Uh. Well, I can't.
He's my boss.
Oh, I guess we can always make
room for one more.
Oh, thank you. [CHUCKLES]
-Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh.
-Huh?
Oh, come in, Mr. Dithers.
Oh, thank you very much.
Oh, hello, Dagwood.
-Hi.
-I was on my way to meet Cora.
Oh, that's my wife,
Mrs. Dithers.
Oh, pleased to meet her.
And since I was passing here
anyway, I thought I'd...
-Oh, you're so kind.
-[CHUCKLES]
I thought I'd drop in and see...
I don't believe
I caught the name?
-[COUGHS]
-I...
What's going on here?
Well, we're looking
for some money.
Yeah. Fifty grand.
-Fifty thousand?
-Uh-huh.
-Dollars?
-Uh. Yes.
-Fifty?
-Uh-huh.
Well.
TOP COAT:
You can just help us find it.
Oh, delighted.
[GRUNTS]
I'm scared.
Don't worry.
Pop will take care of 'em.
Hello, kids.
Oh, some pillow fight you had.
Uh. It was here
just a minute ago.
I... I can't understand
where it disappeared to.
-You mean you had it?
-Uh.
You actually had
and you let it
get away from you?
-Yeah.
-Bumstead, you want...
What's that?
-This, buster, is a g*n.
-Yeah, yeah.
I... I know it's a g*n,
but what's the idea?
What... what's going on here?
Why don't you go over there,
and sit down,
-and button your lip? Come on.
-Oh, just a minute!
-Bumstead?
-Huh?
Who are these men?
What are they doing here?
-Uh.
-Why don't you punch him
-in the nose?
-Well, he's bigger than I am.
-Hmm.
-Well, Mr. Dithers,
um, don't...
don't make them mad.
It's their money.
-Oh.
-[EXHALES]
-Here, hold this.
-Yeah, sure.
-[GRUNTS]
-TOP COAT: What?
-Here, well,
-Wait a minute. What...
what's the idea?
See, my wife is waiting for me.
Didn't the man tell you
to sit down?
Oh, please!
You don't know how she hates
to be kept waiting.
-Who?
-My wife, you ninny!
-Well...
-Shh.
...you know how it is.
You turn a woman loose
in the department store,
and she's liable
to buy the place out.
This is a fine way
to treat a guest.
Who are these people?
Yeah, well, I'm sorry,
Mr. Dithers.
Now, don't go taking it out
on Dagwood.
Nobody asked you here,
Mr. Dithers.
Well. Mm-hmm.
I know when I'm not welcome.
-Mm-hmm.
-That's better.
Y... you know
you're always welcome
at our house, Mr. Dithers,
isn't he?
-No.
-Ye-- Huh?
I think we better take
a look upstairs.
-What do you say?
-Yeah, let's do that, are we?
All right, lady.
Come on. Upstairs.
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
And where do you think
you're going?
Uh. Uh.
With him-- Uh. With her.
They don't need a chaperone.
-Eh...
-[TELEPHONE RINGING]
Um. Somebody better answer it?
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
Hello?
-Oh. It's for you. Mrs. Dithers.
-Oh.
-Oh. Oh, oh. Hello, Cora.
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
Yeah, yeah, C... Cora...
But, dear... Um.
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-I know, I was.
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-Listen.
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-Darling, I...
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-I was...
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-Um. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
-Don't stop by here!
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
That's-- I'll meet you at home.
-Uh...
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-Hmm.
-You see what you've done?
-Quiet.
[CORA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
-[DOGS BARKING]
-MR. DITHERS: Oh.
-It's a 50!
-[DOG BARKS]
-Daisy, open your mouth!
-A 50?
-Where'd you find it?
-Alexander...
Well, Daisy was playing with it.
Alexander,
you get right over here!
[GRUNTS]
A 50.
Where's the rest of it?
Come on, come on!
Where did it go?
-[BARKS]
-Ow!
[INDISTINCT CLAMORING]
-The pup can't understand you.
-Well, why don't you try?
Maybe you can get
something out of him.
Does anybody here
can talk to this pup?
Y... yeah, I'll try.
Come on, Daisy girl.
Now, look, Daisy, now, Daisy.
Where... where...
where is the money?
Oh, please, Daisy,
give us a little idea
-where the money is.
-Where did she come from?
-[BARKS]
-BLONDIE: In the kitchen.
Well, take her in there,
and make her show you.
Okay. Come on.
[GROWLS, BARKS]
Oh, you want it
the hard way, eh?
-Don't hurt her!
-Cookie!
-Oh, come on, Daisy!
-[BARKS]
-Be careful!
-Yeah.
-I...
-Nobody else...
-[INDISTINCT CLAMORING]
-[BARKING]
All right.
Now where's the money?
I didn't ask
for the whole family,
all I wanna know
is where is the money?
Well, don't sit there!
-Where is the money, Daisy?
-[BARKS]
-ARTIE: Over there?
-[DAISY BARKING]
Are you gonna talk mutt,
or do I have to get rough?
[BARKS]
-Oh, up there, huh? Okay.
-[DAISY BARKING]
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
-What is this, a shortcut?
Is my husband... [CHUCKLES]
Oh, good afternoon.
-Good afternoon, ma'am.
-Cora!
Oh, there you are! Oh.
Having company, Blondie?
Do you realize that you kept
me standing there,
waiting for over half an hour?
Now, my dear,
if you'll just be quiet.
Oh! You're redecorating?
I like the furniture
the way it was.
Just sit down a moment.
And me standing there,
waiting, waiting,
with all those packages.
-ARTIE: Get away from me!
-If you dare ever open
your mouth again
about me spending money
-for a taxi, I--
-I won't, my dear, I won't,
-I assure you, just be calm!
-[THUDDING]
COOKIE: Daisy, hide!
That's a good girl!
Stay there Daisy,
don't come out.
-[DAISY BARKS]
-COOKIE: Stay away from him!
-[ARTIE GROANS]
-COOKIE: No, Daisy, back!
She's never done
anything to hurt you.
-[GROWLS]
-Atta girl, Daisy, atta girl!
-[GROWLS]
-Come on.
-Come on, Daisy.
-BLONDIE: Cookie!
-[EXHALES]
-I guess we showed him.
-[CHUCKLES]
-Are you all right, honey?
-Daisy was wonderful!
-Aw!
-Aw!
-What's going on?
-Cora,
-Madam, madam, this is...
-Hey.
-Now just a moment.
Please, please,
contain yourselves.
Whatever in the world
are you doing there?
Oh, go away, will you?
-Well, that's my wife in there.
-Easy does it.
-Now just get back, please.
-CORA: Blondie!
Who is this man and that drunk
lying in the kitchen?
They're thugs. Gunmen.
Well, why do you let them
in the house?
You're a thug?
Alas.
Why, how did a well-mannered,
nice-looking man like you
ever become a thief?
-Just lucky, I guess?
-Oh, but you don't have to be.
Well, it isn't too late.
-You're still young.
-Oh, thank you, ma'am.
You still have time to make
something of yourself.
Now, why don't you get a job,
an honest job,
and save your money
a little each week,
and at the end of ten
or 12 years,
uh, you may have enough
that you wouldn't have
to work anymore, you can retire.
Well, why bother with all that,
I'm not working now.
And as for you, young man,
drunk in that--
-Shut up.
-This... this...
[INDISTINCT CLAMORING]
Please, please!
Don't anybody revive her.
-You found it?
-Yeah.
-Is it all that ?
-I don't know. I'll see.
Carry her in there.
-Come on, let's go.
-All right, come on.
-BLONDIE: Come on.
-MR. DITHERS: Up, up.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
-Well?
-Come on, give me time.
-How long is it gonna take?
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
-ARTIE: Hey.
-Let's go.
-Come on down here.
-What?
-There. Start counting.
-Yeah.
and it'd better all be here.
Uh. Oh, I... I'm sorry.
[CHUCKLES] May I assist you?
-Yeah. Here you are.
-Oh, thank you.
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
-Oh, no.
-Ah, do come in.
-Look, Mister.
Tell the lady
it's after four o'clock,
and I can't park on the street,
it's against the law.
-Hmm. Well, come in, please.
-Whoops. Wrong house.
-Right house.
-This way, please.
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
-[GIGGLES]
-What's with her?
-Oh, she's fainted.
-Hey, you.
-Oh, hello.
Hey, you're enjoying this
a little too much.
-Oh, shouldn't I?
-No, you shouldn't.
I don't trust you.
Well, imagine that,
he doesn't trust me.
-Hey. You count it.
-Huh? Okay.
[MUMBLES, INHALES]
[IMITATES CASH REGISTER]
That's right.
Now, if you have three twenties
and two tens,
it's exactly right.
-We're ten short.
-All right. Let's have it.
-Who? Me?
-Yes, you.
One of the pups
must've gotten away with it.
Yeah, then you can get it
from the pup. [LAUGHS]
-Oh, yeah? [LAUGHS]
-Yeah.
-I see.
-[LAUGHS, CLEARS THROAT]
Now why don't you all of you
nice folks
have a cup of coffee,
and, uh, relax.
Come on, brother.
-Bye, folks.
-Yeah.
Hello, boys. Now, you'll not be
needing these, will ya?
-Oh.
-RILEY: What is this?
You thought I didn't know, eh?
Now is it all here?
-Geez.
-Ten long years.
This way, gentlemen.
After you, gunner.
[♪♪♪]
-Good day.
-Harriet!
[GRUNTS]
That's right, you have to be
a gentleman. Come on!
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
HERB: There goes my ten dollars!
[♪♪♪]
[SNORES]
After all that excitement,
no wonder you can't sleep.
Drink your milk, dear,
and you'll sleep like a baby.
-[SNORES]
-Hey, I'll get cold.
[SNORES]
The least you can do
after I go to all that trouble,
so you can fall asleep
is drink it.
-[SNORES]
-Dagwood?
[GASPS] What happened?
-Huh?
-Your milk, dear.
-Oh.
-Drink it while it's hot,
-so you can fall asleep.
-Thanks, dear.
[SLURPS]
Uh. I was asleep!
[♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]