03x04 - Stand By Me

[bunniefuu]

♪ yeah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪
♪ yeah-ah-ah, yeah ♪
♪ oh-oh-oh ♪

Hi, beautiful.

Hey.

Did you, um... did you get any sleep?

[sighs] Not much.

Me, neither.

Nervous about your first day back?

Yeah, probably.

[sighs]

[stammering]

Where you going?

Just gonna get a coffee.

No. I'm in charge of your recuperation.

[sighs] It's my first day back at work, Charlie.

I'm recuperated.

I like looking after you.

♪ get up, get up ♪

Coffee.

♪ get out of bed ♪
♪ stop wastin' time ♪

Dawn: Is it chafing?

Yeah. The bra rubs against my staples.

I feel like Frankenstein with these things in.

Well, stitches would have traumatized the skin, so you're welcome.

But after shift, I'll take them out.

Really?

Yeah, it's been three weeks. Looks like you're healing.

Okay, so, we're gonna start in the E.R. today.

E.R.... straight into the deep end. Okay.

Remember, I'm just gonna be tagging along with you, right?

That's why they call it a "buddy colleague."

Sounds so friendly.

H.R. policy... any doctor who suffers a trauma in the hospital has to undergo a four-hour supervised shift.

I'm back, Dawn. I'm ready to work.

Great.

Prove it to me, I'll put you right back on the surgical board.

I will prove it.

Let's go.

[siren wailing, dog barking in distance,]

[church bell tolling]

[man coughing]

[indistinct conversations]

Gentlemen, this the line for the clinic?

And a doctor called, uh, Selena works here?

I had a patient who d*ed just a few days ago.

I believe he wanted me to give this to Selena.

I'll give it to her.

No, it's okay. I can just hand it to her myself.

I'll be two seconds.

No way.

Paul: Are you a doctor?

Yes, I am a doctor, but I don't work here.

Can you just take a look at my brother's arm?

I can't just do anything right now. I've got to drop this off to...

Please.

What has happened to your hands?

My brother, please.

Wait a minute, sir.

Gabriel...

This man is a doctor.

Show him.

Pull up your sleeve for me.

It's here.

Pull it right up.

[grunts]

It's okay.

[breathing shakily]

Wow.

You have been sh*t.

Oh, go for it. You deserve it.

Oh, no. No, thank you, dear.

My eating days are over.

I d*ed last night.

Oh.

Sorry for your passing.

Thought I'd stroll around for a while.

I'm waiting for my husband to join me.

[man groaning loudly]

Get her away from me!

He broke my nose!

[shouting indistinctly]

Alex: What have you got, Zach?

Oh, real sweetheart, 45, penetrating abdominal wound, left lower quadrant. This your first day back?

Yep.

All right. Let's get some extra hands over here.

[radio chatter]

We got a big guy for this transfer. Here we go.

[whimpering] On my count.

Ready, 1, 2, 3.

[groaning loudly]

Right into the deep end, Reid.

Tell me about it. Scissors?

Last blood pressure was 105 by palp.

Okay, I'll expose the wound.

[man groaning]

Alex? Are you okay?

Yeah. I'm fine.

Hey, someone want to relieve me of this thing? It kills!

Give me the fast.

I'll do it. I'll run the fast.

No, I can do it, Zach.

Okay.

Sir, I'm gonna check for bleeding in your abdomen.

Just hold on, okay?

[man breathing heavily, groaning]

[beeping] No fluid in Morison's pouch.

Perisplenic's clear.

Pericardiac's clear.

[beeping] Pelvis is negative.

Are you sure? Those shears look pretty deep.

The patient's love-handles are fatty.

There's no way that those shears could've penetrated the fascia.

Man: S-she just called me fat!

I-I meant fleshy, sir.

Okay, there's no free fluid in the abdomen. You're lucky.

I think it's safe to take the shears out.

I'll do it.

No, no. This is Reid's patient.

Got it.

[man groaning]

I got it. I got it.

Alex: Next patient? Moving on.

Woman, 60s, impacted bowel.

She's needs a manual extraction.

[sighs] Get me a visor. I'm going in.

Come sit.

Hey, hey! What are you doing?!

Joel: Hey, I'm sorry to burst in like this.

We need to look at this patient right now.

Do you have any gloves?

Yeah, who are you?

Joel Goran. I'm a doctor.

Oh! Oh, well, in that case, sure. Here.

What have you got?

GSW, and from the looks of things, there's no exit wound.

I'll take a look. Let's see.

Small caliber. .22, maybe?

You see a lot of this kind of stuff here?

No, but I was a field medic in Afghanistan, so I've seen it before.

Penetrating wound like this definitely needs imaging.

I mean, there's no exit wound, so, you know, it could've migrated to just about anywhere. It's an extremely dangerous situation.

I need to call an ambulance right now.

No!

Hey, what are you doing?

No hospitals.

You need to go to an emergency room right now.

Hospitals mean police, police mean immigration!

Okay, let's all just calm down.

Wow!

Help my brother now!

[groans]

What is that?

It's just a little local freezing.

Joel: Thank you.

You can put the Kn*fe away.

What's your name?

Paul. And I am not putting the Kn*fe away, not until my brother is fixed and we are walking out that door.

Okay, I'm just saying, you don't need it.

I treat everyone here, monday and wednesday from 8: 00 A.M. to 7: 00 P.M. I don't turn anybody away.

Good for you. I don't care.

I don't care if you don't have your status or your medical card. This is a safe place.

Safe?

Someone breaks into our room while we are sleeping, steals from us.

And then sh**t me.

That is safe?

Do we have a wound debridement tray, please?

We have tweezers... on a tray.

Tweezers will do.

You have any narcotics?

No.

Wow.

There's a room full of addicts out there.

Okay.

We do, however, have antibiotics, and he will need a tetanus sh*t.

Has the freezing set in yet, mate?

[groans] Maybe a little.

This could hurt... a little.

Brace yourself.

[groaning] Doing the best I can.

Selena: Paul, are you sure your brother is the only one that was wounded?

Of course. Stop talking to me.

Listen, I'm just saying, you-you look like you're bleeding, too.

Just... just there.

[grunts]

Joel: Okay.

You just did that.

[groans]

Gabriel!

Hey, what are you doing? Buddy, buddy, you can't move him!

Come on, Gabriel! We have to go!

He's in really rough shape right now!

I'm sorry for what I did, but you do not understand.

Listen, nobody's calling the cops.

Let's sit down and talk about this.

Why should we trust you?

Who else do you have, man?

Please, let us figure out what to do about his arm.

[gasping]

Okay! Okay.

But no hospitals.

You might want to weigh your options here, man.

Deportation... your brother lives.

No hospital... your brother dies.

Those are not our options!

We have no options!

We came here from Uganda, and my brother... is gay, okay?

Okay, I'm sorry. I know the situation there.

Then you know if I go home, I'll be k*lled.

We can't go home.

Okay, I'll take out the b*llet.

Let's take it out.

Yeah.

Okay.

Let's go.

I'll take the b*llet out.

All right.

[groaning]

[scraping]

Dr. Murphy?

We, uh... we have a session scheduled for... now?

Why don't you take this? I... think you need it more than me.

Um, do-do you w...

Alex: And another deep inhale.

[breathes deeply, coughs]

His cough is horrid.

Aw, poor Glenny.

Well, Glen, your lungs sound crackly.

And with your fever being so high, I'm going to have to admit you.

Oh, I-I never get sick.

I never spent a single day in a hospital.

You're gonna miss your trip to Point Pelee.

[sighing] Ohh.

I was hoping to get a glimpse of the redheaded woodpecker today.

I always get a photo of it for Rita every year.

Well, if your fever goes down and your lungs improve, you will be out birding again soon.

Whoo-hoo!

Never spent a day in a hospital... that's lucky.

Well, it's uneventful, that's true.

[coughing]

Okay, Glenny, I'm gonna go and get some of your things.

You might need your slippers.

We'll keep a close eye on him, all right?

Mm-hmm.

Slowing down, Alex? Need a nap?

Nope.

Fantastic.

[siren wailing in distance]

[sighs] Manual extraction of an impacted bowel... haven't done that since med school.

[chuckles] It's not so bad.

Yeah, I'm just not a big fan of poo.

[chuckles]

Alex, are you bleeding?

You okay?

Yeah, it's nothing. I'm fine.

No, you're not. Come on.

[clears throat]

I think the underwire of your bra is yanking on your staples.

I'm gonna put a dressing on it, okay?

Okay.

Are you afraid to look at your own blood?

[sighs]

I didn't used to be.

Hmm.

Just don't say anything, okay?

Right.

There's something else you might remember about the old you.

She had loyal friends.

Still does.

Okay.

Okay.

So, you're worried about Dr. Murphy?

Yeah, that's one way of putting it.

You're an orthopedic surgeon. Has he broken his wrist?

Shrink humor.

He's a friend.

Just a friend?

Yes, he's my doctor, Stu.

And he's been canceling my appointments.

And, uh, well, he doesn't seem like himself.

Well, if he's not seeing his patients, I'm his department head. I could talk to him.

Thank you.

[breathing deeply]

[sighs]

[door opens]

Gavin: Dr. Dey.

[sighs]

Thanks for sharing an office with me.

Don't you ever knock?

No.

You a vegetarian?

No.

Your washing machine broken?

No, it works fine, thank you.

I see.

Band T-shirt, listless demeanor... you're heartbroken.

Well [sighs] nothing you can do about that.

[door closes]

[breathes deeply]

Ugh.

Oh.

[chuckling] Hello! Yes!

Yes! Mmm.

Mmm.

[door opens]

[clears throat, sighs]

Forgot my luescher color cards.

You familiar with the nature of my clinical trial, Dr. Murphy?

Palliative patients. Drug trial.

I'm documenting the effects of LSD on the anxiety of terminal patients.

And, uh... those sugar cubes are the delivery method.

How many did you take?

Three.

Yeah. You'll be tripping soon.

But don't worry, it'll only last 12 to 14 hours.

[breathing shallowly]

Hi, Glen.

Jackson, what's going on?

SATs are dropping, and he's having a hard time catching his breath.

Even with the nasal prongs?

Yeah.

[weakly] I want Rita.

Okay, can you, uh, go and try to find Mrs. Brown for me, please?

Okay, try to remain calm. I'm gonna have a listen.

Hi, there, Glen. I'm Dr. Bell.

Everything okay here?

He's having trouble breathing.

Dawn?

Hey, Jackson, can you just elevate the head of his bed a little further?

Yeah.

Alex, what are you hearing?

Nothing. I can't hear a heart.

Joel: Okay.

Yes, yes. Like that.

There we are.

Just like that. You're strong.

Didn't even travel very far at all.

Look!

There... whoa!

Look at me!

Get me some pressure on this, please.

Tourniquet him as tight as we can.

We need as much pressure as we can get.

What did you do to my brother?!

The b*llet was plugging a hole in your brother's artery, Paul.

I removed the b*llet. The hole was exposed.

I promised to save you. Now I've k*lled you.

My brother, my only brother!

Paul, you need to be calm right now.

We're gonna try and fix him right here.

Okay, that artery is torn to shreds.

But you know what? I do believe that I can tie it up, though.

Cut off the blood supply to his hand?

No, um...

[sighs] Paul, I'm gonna need your help.

Okay.

Okay, I'm not a nurse. I'm a doctor. I can help you if you tell me what you want.

Okay, doctor. Thank you. The ulna will pick up the slack.

Can you open a new suture kit for me, please?

Okay.

Paul, get some gloves on for me, please.

They're right there.

Right down there.

Now, watch what I'm doing, buddy.

Watch what I'm doing here.

Selena and I are gonna tie up the artery, and we're gonna stop the bleeding.

Gabriel, listen to me. I'm gonna do this as quick as I can, but I'm not gonna lie to you. This is gonna hurt a lot.

Gabriel: No! No!

Hold your brother.

Aah! [grunts]

[screaming]

Hold him, Paul.

Stop!

Stop! It is too much for him!

Okay, you know what? This is useless. We need painkillers.

Okay.

What? Wait a minute. Where are you going?

To go buy dr*gs.

[door opens]

Alex: It's called situs inversus totalis.

Basically, all of your organs are backwards.

Backwards organs? Like how?

Like a mirror image.

Everything that we normally see on the left... your heart, your stomach... it's on the right.

My heart's over here?

Yes.

Hope Zion has never had a patient like you, Glen.

You are a medical marvel.

Oh, this is crazy.

I've always just been ordinary.

Rita calls me her "common house sparrow."

And now you're telling me that...

Inside, you are not at all common.

I'm the redheaded woodpecker.

Alex, can you come have a look at this?

How that got missed, I will never understand.

I was listening to his lungs, not his heart.

Okay. Myocardial damage.

Glen, it looks like you've had a heart att*ck.

A heart att*ck?

Have you had any sharp pains in your chest recently?

About 10 days ago or so?

Uh...

I-I was putting some jack pine in my backyard. I...

The birds like to nest in it.

But I thought it was just overstraining.

No, that was probably a heart att*ck.

A heart att*ck?

So, we're gonna need to monitor your heart while we wait for your lungs to clear, okay?

Oh, boy.

This is shaping up to be quite a day.

Just embrace your inner redhead.

[both chuckle]

[Gavin sobbing]

I'm an orange.

[whimpers] Everybody wants to peel me.

Jimmy: Gavin, you're not an orange. You're a man.

These are just the physiological symptoms of the drug.

Drug?

Dr. Murphy is extremely high on LSD.

I'm an orange.

We can't leave him like this.

No, of course not. You said he was depressed?

This is an opportunity.

You want to experiment on him?

No, I want to treat him.

Uh...

You offered me a job because you wanted to be at the forefront of the psychedelic renaissance.

Okay.

You C.C. me on your notes.

All right, my man. You're coming out.

Come on. Come on.

Ohh. Ohh.

Watch your head.

Lorazepam.

Lorazepam's not strong enough.

The lorazepam is for Paul, because we can't have your retractor being jumpy.

For Gabriel, I got you some ketamine.

Joel: Wait a minute. You found ketamine?

Yep.

Where did you find that?

Don't ask.

Okay.

Take that.

Gabriel.

Joel: Well, that should seriously dull the pain.

Let's give that a minute to work.

And then we'll tie off this artery.

[coughing]

[monitors beeping rapidly]

Alex: Okay, he's spitting up blood.

Glen, you're gonna be okay.

Flash pulmonary edema.

You're gonna be okay, Glen.

[continues coughing]

Okay, he's getting worse. Let's prep him for surgery.

What happened?

Glen, we've got you. We got you.

Glenny!

Don't try to... don't try to talk.

Glenny?

Your husband needs surgery, okay?

What?!

The heart att*ck ruptured a muscle in his heart. He needs mitral valve repair.

No! No, no.

Listen to me. You're gonna be fine, okay?

Glenny, I'm here, honey.

Rita, Dr. Bell's gonna take very good care of your husband.

If you can escort Rita to the waiting room, and we will come and find you as soon as we're through, okay?

Okay, your four hours are up.

Consider yourself back on the board.

[coughing]

So, you're left-handed.

Yes.

Which means you're used to thinking backwards.

Alex: Uh, you could say that.

Okay, every tool in this hospital is for right-handed surgeons. How do you do that?

I just do the opposite of everything you do.

Can I have a minute?

Sure.

Surgery with Dawn first day back. That's gonna be... fun.

[chuckles]

Hey, um, I-I-I wanted to make reservations tonight for Scaramouche.

Well, I don't know how long this case will take, but, um...

I love Scaramouche.

Well, we don't have to go.

Uh, we could go for a drink or something like that.

We don't have to go there.

You should just come over.

Really?

I'll see you tonight.

Okay, go get 'em. [chuckles]

[monitors beeping]

All the vessels in this guy's heart will be reversed.

I put one suture in the wrong direction, his heart will stop.

Okay.

Once I saw through his chest, we'll flood him with heparin.

Need to really thin out his blood.

Right.

Situs inversus is really rare.

Our pal Glen here is the main attraction.

[breathing shakily]

Alex: My heart isn't b*ating.

Charlie: You just need to hold on.

[breathing shakily]

Alex?

Are you okay?

No. I feel sick.

I think I should sit this one out.

Okay. Go home.

I can still do my shift in the E.R.

Page Reycraft. I'm gonna need him.

No, go home. You're not ready to be back.

Talk to me about love, Gavin. What is love?

I wasn't passionate enough for her.

She wanted "that kind of love."

What kind of love?

Crazy love!

It didn't work out! She was... pregnant, and then she had a miscarriage!

You want to talk about the miscarriage?

You must have felt it yourself.

"My self."

"Myself." "Myself." "Mice elf."

Neuroscientists don't think that there is a self.

Yeah, but we're not neuroscientists here.

We're psychiatrists. The self is our bread and butter, so what do you believe about the self?

I believe that we all have a one true self that we can uncover and become.

Ah, Winnicott's theory of a true self based on authentic and spontaneous experience.

Yes.

Did you feel like your true self when you were with Maggie?

Can we go for a walk? I want to go for a walk.

"Patient not ready for self-examination yet."

"Going for a walk."

[clears throat]

Thanks for asking me to assist.

Put on your three-dimensional thinking cap, 'cause this is gonna be a bugger.

I never take it off.

This guy's popular.

[chuckling] Yeah. The more, the merrier.

So, normally, once you've opened up the pericardium, you can see the right ventricle of the heart.

Uh, yep, I know what I would normally see, Tom.

All of the vessels and arteries in his heart are 100% backwards. It's like... it's like I've gone down the rabbit hole.

[sighs]

Okay, trade places with me again.

[sighs] Yeah. I mean, uh, it's the same.

I can't even see the valve from this side.

So, what happened to Reid?

She tanked.

Ouch.

Baumann, how's my patient?

Stable. Why?

Good, because I am gonna need a moment.

Man: ♪ days gone by, as I sat beside the mill ♪
♪ and gazed upon the setting sun ♪
♪ as it sank beneath the hill ♪
♪ I gazed on it once more, me boys ♪

What's with the hoedown?

Dee and Bo's room.

Their family's playing folksy instruments.

Driving you nuts?

Beyond belief.

Well, actually, it's kind of sweet.

Everyone thought Dee would hold on and wait for her husband so they could die together, but she went last night.

♪ oh, how I long for those bright days ♪
♪ to come again once more ♪
♪ but come again they never will ♪
♪ for now I'm 64 ♪

The grandkids are giving their papa a proper send-off.

♪ I went a little further on as up the hill I walked ♪

Charlie: It's a talented family.

Mm, our brood.

You know, never once have we spent a night apart, Bo and I... until now.

How long were you married?

70 years.

Wow.

Even when the kids were born.

It was against the rules back then, but...

Bo used to sneak into my hospital room and nestle in beside me and... hold my hand.

That's devotion.

Mm.

Things are different now, I guess.

Bo and I are... a dying breed.

♪ I'm 64 ♪

Literally.

[distorted laughter]

♪ I used to believe ♪
♪ that the t*rture for me ♪
♪ was all I would need ♪
♪ and I held it high ♪
♪ and you watched me smile ♪
♪ as I roll on into the darkening sky ♪
♪ light years away ♪
♪ a lifetime of light speed ♪
♪ I hear you say ♪
♪ light years away ♪

[baby babbling, distorted]

♪ a lifetime of light speed ♪
♪ I hear you say ♪

[siren wailing in distance]

I need your help.

I can't do it.

Glen's surgery. I just... I can't see it.

You're the only left-handed surgeon in the hospital, and...

I need you.

[sniffles] No.

God. You were right. I am not ready.

Well, then, why are you still here?

[scoffs]

Because I am afraid if I leave, I will never come back.

Dawn, the last time I was in that O.R., I was on the table.

I know that, Alex. I was there.

And I held your heart in my hand.

[sniffles]

And that was the scariest surgery that I have ever done.

And I made a mistake. Did you know that?

Did you know that I made a mistake?

But I fixed it.

And the next day, I was back operating again.

[sighs]

And what if I can't do it?

Hmm?

There's only one way to find out.

Yeah.

Thisdawn: Okay, so, normally,. I would stitch towards my 9: 00, but this is backwards land, so today...

Alex: I'm going to stitch towards my 3: 00.

Right.

Even for a lefty, this is a bit of a mind freak.

If I go too deep into this aspect of the heart...

When we take him off pump, he'll die.

That's not gonna happen.

You're ready for this.

[breathes deeply]

Okay. Here goes.

You're doing great, Paul.

Hey, Paul, is Lake Victoria as beautiful as I remember it being?

You know it?

Oh, yeah. I backpacked around the Ssese Islands for a while.

I'll never forget the amazing birdlife there and the...

I mean, the clear skies.

It was perfect weather the whole time.

Sounds like heaven.

Yeah, it was.

It was like paradise.

Gabriel: Where's Daniel?

Daniel... where's Daniel?

Gabriel's boyfriend.

He was arrested.

Is that why you left?

The university paper printed a list of all of those suspected of being gay... their names and their addresses.

Gabriel and Daniel were on that list.

So your brother left his boyfriend behind?

Had to.

I keep telling him that he will find love again.

But so far, he does not believe me.

Yeah, finding love can be hard.

Okay, I've tied off the radial artery.

Ms. Clamps, Mr. Retraction, you may release.

Look at that.

He's pinking up.

We have perfusion. Blood flow is back.

Is it?

Yeah.

I'm thirsty.

We'll get you water.

I cannot thank you enough.

It's the little clinic that could.

What are you seeing?

Maggie.

She came back.

What's she doing?

[sighs] She's so beautiful.

She's carrying a baby.

The baby you lost?

That's right.

How do you feel about Maggie?

[inhales sharply, groans]

I don't want to talk about it.

Are you afraid?

I'm afraid.

Jimmy and Maggie: What are you afraid of, Gavin?

[breathing heavily]

I can't look at you. Y-you're too beautiful.

[chuckles]

You have to look at me.

[breathing shakily]

I tried everything I could.

I tried to be exactly what you wanted all the time.

You certain?

That you tried hard enough?

Yes!

You're very intimidating.

No, I'm not.

Yeah, you went to Harvard. [chuckles]

I'm just a guy who... who had a narcissistic mother, who grew up to be a shrink. [chuckles]

Your mother left you when you were 7... to go "find" herself.

You're very, very worried that nobody will ever truly love you.

I'm not good enough.

You're good.

And it's okay to go "find" yourself.

Yeah, but... my mom... you just said that's what she did, and...

Shh. Don't be afraid.

You're good.

What are you thinking, Gavin?

[sighs]

I'm not thinking. I'm feeling.

That's progress. What are you feeling?

[sighs]

Angry.

Feeling angry.

[sighs, chuckles]

Anger and...

[chuckles] and surprise and... worry.

[sighs]

Anger.

Mostly angry.

What else?

What else, Gavin?

I don't know.

What's going on?

[exhales softly]

I'm having another strong feeling.

Of anger?

No.

The other one.

Love?

[laughing softly]

Alex: Okay, almost there.

[monitors beeping]

[sighs]

Done.

Good job.

Baumann, put our patient into Trendelenburg.

We are gonna shake the hell out of this guy.

I'm sorry. Shake him?

It's the only way to de-air his heart.

We don't do it... he could have a massive stroke.

Vent on. Leave some blood behind.

Consider it done.

Baumann, sustained puff on the lungs.

Ready?

Yeah.

Shake.

[laughing]

Are you laughing, Alex?

[continues laughing]

Thank you, Dawn, really.

Welcome back, Dr. Reid.

Now shake!

[laughs]

The video would only be used for educational purposes.

Med students everywhere could benefit from seeing your surgery.

I don't know.

I would also like you to consider being an organ donor.

You could really help someone with your condition.

Just think about it, okay?

Thanks, doc.

I'm just happy to be alive.

Your wife's happy, too.

I don't know about this inversus thing.

I-I don't want this attention.

Please tell Dr. bell that.

Sure.

But, you know, this condition makes you special.

It's nothing to hide, Glen.

You met Rita. She's the rare bird.

She's the redheaded woodpecker, and I'm the common house sparrow.

And that's what's worked for us for 20 years.

I don't want to mess that up.

You're afraid things will change because you're different?

I like my life the way it is.

What if you found out you were completely different inside?

Wouldn't you be scared things would change?

[sighs]

Ah, yes. Lost and found, the hidden gems you contain.

Yeah.

Deep down, you're really enjoying wearing that shirt, aren't you?

[laughs]

You were kind of amazing today.

I mean, you've got nerves of steel.

Thank you.

It's all in a day's work.

And... [sighs] there's this. Um...

A few days ago, a patient of mine passed away, um, and I found this among his personal effects.

His... his name was... Roy Wilson?

Roy d*ed, huh?

Yeah, he did, unfortunately.

I liked him.

Me, too.

Um...

[chuckles sadly]

He was paying me back money that he stole from me.

It was kind of our thing.

Can you give this to Paul and Gabriel?

Yeah.

Thanks.

And, listen, if you're ever interested in moonlighting in street medicine, my little clinic isn't going anywhere.

Cool, I'll keep that in mind.

Good.

Thank you again.

[sighs]

Hey.

You, uh, feeling better? I heard you, uh... had an experience.

You're a little wavy, but I'm all right.

That's... that's, uh... that's good.

[chuckles]

I had such a clear picture of my future.

Maggie and I would have a baby, probably get married, and then I would work here. She would become a surgeon.

And, uh [sighs]

I feel like my fate's changed.

And I saw it as the end.

And then I had this realization that... when your fate changes...

You change your fate.

I might go somewhere else for a while.

Where?

I don't know.

Oh.

Well, hey, uh... good luck to you, man. I hope you... good luck to you. I hope you...

Hey.

[peeling orange]

[sniffles]

[clears throat]

Gavin?

This is the part of me that is for you.

What are you doing?

I'm leaving.

[Sleeping Wolf's "The wreck of our hearts" playing]

Goodbye, Maggie.

Goodbye.

♪ we were driftin' all night ♪

Be good.

♪ losin' hold of the light ♪
♪ but I saw in your eyes ♪
♪ I was never alone ♪
♪ even when it got hard ♪
♪ when the shore was too far ♪
♪ even there in your arms ♪
♪ I've always been home ♪
♪ ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh ♪
♪ ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, ooh ♪
♪ so sing while we're fallin' apart ♪
♪ I'll take you dancin' ♪
♪ we've lived through ♪
♪ the wreck of our hearts ♪
♪ and now we're just ♪
♪ pickin' up the pieces ♪
♪ ooh-ooh ♪
♪ learnin' how to see when ♪
♪ love is in the dark ♪
♪ ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh ♪
♪ and now we're just ♪
♪ pickin' up the pieces ♪
♪ ooh-ooh ♪
♪ learnin' how to see ♪
♪ when love is in the dark ♪
♪ there's a cold, empty room ♪
♪ there's a windowless view ♪
♪ there's a me without you ♪
♪ but that's not where I belong ♪
♪ through the waves of the deep ♪

Hey.

Hey.

♪ and the storms of the sea ♪

...come sit with me.

♪ I have you, and you, me ♪

Okay.

[sniffles, sighs]

♪ we're not too far gone ♪
♪ so sing while we're fallin' apart ♪

I saw something tonight that made me realize...

♪ we've lived through ♪
♪ the wreck of our hearts ♪

I don't want to spend another night apart from you for the next... 70 years.

♪ and now we're just pickin' up the pieces ♪
♪ learnin' how to see when ♪

What are you doing, Charlie?

♪ love is in the dark ♪

I'm, uh...

♪ we were driftin' all night ♪

I'm marrying you.

♪ losin' hold of the light ♪
♪ but I saw in your eyes ♪

Don't do this.

♪ I was never alone ♪

I'm putting it all on the table, Alex.

I want it... I want it back like it was before.

♪ when the shore was too far ♪
♪ even there in your arms ♪

Well, I'm-I'm not the same person that I was before, Charlie, and...

♪ I've always been home ♪

[sighs] I can't... I can't keep pretending.

♪ ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, ooh ♪

You've been... you've been "pretending?"

What have you been pretending?

I don't know who I am anymore, Charlie.

♪ I'll take you dancin' ♪

Okay, Alex, well, recovery takes some time, okay?

And I know that better than anybody.

[chuckles]

For you.

♪ ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh ♪

But... but this is... this is me.

And ever since I woke up, I have been...

I have been trying, okay? But I don't know who we are.

I-I don't know what my feelings are.

They're just not the same as they were before, and I feel lost.

Okay.

Sweetheart, we can get those back.

You just... you need to give this some more time.

You're not listening!

Alex, I want to listen to you. Help me understand.

Will you... will you... will you please let me understand?!

I don't think I love you anymore.

♪ we lived through ♪
♪ the wreck of our hearts ♪
♪ and now we're just ♪
♪ pickin' up the pieces ♪
♪ ooh-ooh ♪
♪ learnin' how to see ♪
♪ when love is in the dark ♪

I don't love you anymore.

♪ love is in the dark ♪