01x09 - Collins Family

[bunniefuu]

Tonight on "supernanny"...

Jo travels the globe looking for the worst family yet,

And she finds them in britai.

Can I come in, please?

The collins family will be the biggest challenge yet,

Putting her methods to the ultimate test.

When it comes to discipline, dad lays down the law...

Sit down.

...while mom... Joseph.

[ Glass shatters ]

...ducks for cover.

You do not spit.

Jo will have to use new techniques...

We're gonna do a treasure hunt.

...to get these kids in orde.

Don't know if she'll be able to do it.

♪ Be good, be good, be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Johnny

♪ Be good, be good, be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Johnny

♪ Johnny

Let's take a look and see who we've got here.

Hi, I'm jason collin.

Hi, I'm karen collins.

We're here to talk about our four children,

Starting with be, who's the eldest.

He's , and he encourags the little ones

But I love being stupid.

Lauren's probably the calmer

Of the four kids, but she does have her moments.

Lauren, can you stop that, please?

And joshua, he's the middle oe of the boys.

He's .

And joseph who is .

Joseph's the worst one of all.

No!

[ Glass shatters ] joe, no!

Stop it!

This is their home that they're wrecking.

Joseph.

Disgusting!

Look at them spitting. They're like camels.

[ Bleep ] [ bleep ]

[ Bleep ]

Ben, please, can you stop swearing?

Why are you putting up with this?

Karen: joshua, no! There's a car ther!

Mom, you need to get control of your children.

The children behave a lot differently to me

Than they do to jason.

They're like different children,

Josh, now.

Karen: but I think jason's too hard.

I don't think he gives them enough love, really.

We've lost the, so I shoud say, love for each other.

Supernanny, please help

So that I can get control back of the house

And not feel like a failure.

I've seen enough, and I'm on my way to sort it out now.

[ Doorbell rings ]

Jo: hello. Where's your mommy?

Can I come in, please?

Hi. What's your name?

I'm pleased to meet you. I'm jo.

I'm karen.

My first impression when I met jo

Was that she was quite sort of kind and caring.

What's your name? Ben.

Hi, ben. Pleased to meet you.

When I first arrive at a home, I like to observe a family,

Watch the dynamics of how they interact with one another,

And take mental notes.

Is he out there? Come and show me.

Karen: joe, come in.

Ben, can you stop swinging? Get off of there.

Shh. Get down.

[ Laughs ]

The behavior was just absolutely appalling.

They were swearing.

They were spitting at one another.

Mom had no control whatsoever.

Josh, stop it!

No, put it down. No, put it -- no!

You better put that down now.

At that point, I realized that he was testing me,

And he wanted to see whether I was gonna flinch --

Whether his behavior was going to shock me.

Stop it!

So that's common for josh to be throwing stuff around?

Yeah, they all throw things.

The behavior that I saw in the backyard

Was just totally socially unacceptable full stop.

So how you gonna get the kids in?

Just try until they decide to come in, really.

The children are like animals in a zoo.

I've just walked into that household,

And I've seen v*olence.

I've seen the children swear at one another and their mother.

[ Bleep ] karen: mustn't say that, josh.

Their begging to be put in their place.

Don't throw it in my face! Give that to me now!

I was relieved that she'd seen how extreme it could be,

'Cause, obviously, she knows that I needed help quite badly.

Please don't. Joshua, what?

Well, get upstairs and get dressed then.

Getting the kids ready for school can take

An hour and a half, two hours if they're playing up.

We never, ever leave on time.

Are you gonna go and get dressed then?

They just really don't take mom seriously at all.

Joseph, come here.

[ Laughs ]

The mornings are chaotic.

Children are running up and down everywhere.

Mom can't actually catch one of the children to get them dressed

Or to brush their teeth, and she's clearly struggling

While they have a laugh and completely mock her.

Josh!

[ Glass shatters ] what was that?

They hadn't even left the house yet to go off to school.

I mean, what kind of behavior's that?

Come, be good, boys, 'cause we're very late.

No more fighting. Can we go to school?

Ben, you mustn't kick him in the head.

Karen trying to get the kids off to school is one big problem.

Aah!

[ Horn honks ]

So we've got three kids in the car,

One child out on the street.

Apart from the fact that mom's really struggling

To get them into the car,

That is a main road,

And that little boy is in danger.

Joshua, come here now!

As soon as I catch one child, another one runs off.

And I've only got one pair of hands,

So that can take quite a long time.

Jo: when they eventually left to go to school,

They were running minutes behind,

And they've never made it on time for school.

No, ben, please don't put it on the floor.

You can wipe that up, can't you?

Ben, no, no, no! Come on, come on.

Stop it. Ben, put it down.

Their behavior was just destructive.

No, ben! Don't do that!

[ Banging ]

Stop it!

Ben, you're really gonna break something in a minute.

Stop it! Stop it.

Jo: mom just broke down.

She just had got to a point

Where she realized the children are in control.

Jo: talk to me.

But we will get to the bottom of this.

And we will resolve this, okay, and make things better.

I've seen my fair share of families over the last years,

But this one is gonna be a big challenge.

Coming up on...

When dad gets home from work. His job is just beginning.

Pick 'em up.

Will jo's methods work?

It's mob rule in this house.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good

Hello. How's things?

What did he do?

Jo. Hi, jo.

When dad came home from work,

He walked into the house, saw the mess.

Why you been doing that, ben?

And in there.

Ben!

Ben!

He was absolutely fuming at what he'd come home to.

Pick 'em up.

[ Crying ]

Oh, god.

Pick 'em up. Pick 'em up, joe.

Did you make the mess?

Jason: I get very frustrated

Because I feel that karen should discipline the children.

Jo: is that kind of what I've just experience in the sitting-room

That you'll ask the children to do something,

And they'll go to karen, and karen won't back you up?

Straight away, all the time.

Why doesn't karen back you up?

'Cause she thinks I'm too firm.

My role is to shout at the children

To get a bit more organization in the house.

Go to bed.

And think about what you've done, ben.

Jo: jason is fed up with coming home

And having to reinforce discipline because karen won't,

And that's putting stress on their relationship.

Those children know

They can do exactly what they want when they want

Because they know their mom's not gonna do anything about it.

After observing a family for a day,

I like to sit down with the parents

And talk about what I've observed

And the issues that need to be addressed.

The pair of you work very hard to keep a nice home together.

I can see when I walk into the door.

The children are very energetic,

And they've got lots of love to give one another.

They are close. That's really lovely to see.

But...

...it's mob rule in this house.

Your four children control the pair of you.

The aggression is just absolutely disgusting.

They swear. They hit one another.

They spit. It's just appalling.

We agree. Don't we?

Yeah, totally.

You can't even take them out in public

Because they're like wild animals roaming everywhere.

And it emotionally upsets me, 'cause you're scared

Because you don't know what they're gonna do next.

You don't know if they're gonna throw something at your heads

Or whether they're gonna behave.

I walked into this house. I had a brick thrown at me.

What kind of behavior is that?

You really do need to get a grip of this,

Because you're gonna be dealing with something far worse

In three years' time if you don't put it together.

All of this we agree on.

What we can't agree on is how to bring them back into line.

Where you're firm with the children,

You're weak with the children.

Where you won't tell them off, jason has to tell them off.

That is not working.

None of you are backing one another up.

Karen, why can't you tell your kids off?

I just don't like seeing them upset.

Your kids love you.

Your children love you unconditionally.

[ Sniffles ]

Sorry.

Karen, your children won't turn around and go, "I hate you,"

'Cause you decided that you need to put house rules down.

You're so scared

That your kids are gonna grow up and not love you.

Am I right or wrong?

Yeah. It's true.

You guys need to come together, okay?

Jason...you need to validate that your wife's struggling.

Are you willing %

To take everything it's got in you to change your family?

That's the reason I wake up every single morning.

That's the reason I do the work and the hours I do

Is for karen and the children.

[ Sniffles ]

Karen, are you committed %?

Just can't go on like this.

Are you together, as a couple,

Prepared to put the hard work in and change it?

Yeah.

Yeah? Then let's do it.

When jo referred to our house as mob rule,

I did feel quite upset, but it was true.

She was just telling us the facts straight, really.

Jason: the hardest part for me to hear from jo

Was the behavior of my children.

I wanted to argue back, but I couldn't.

So that was quite hard.

A stranger coming in and telling me

How destructive my children are

Brought me and karen to where we are.

All right, let's get working then.

Coming up on...

Jo is shocked by the kids' behavior.

Stop it. I've not finished talking.

The naughty-zone technique is pushed to the limit.

[ Crying ]

And when karen breaks down, jo takes control

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good

Jo: I'm really looking forward to working

With the collins family because they're at dire straits.

They're pulling their hair out, and if they don't get my help,

Things are only just going to get much, much worse.

Household rules.

They're important, because if you don't have household rules,

Your children don't know what behavior is acceptable

And what isn't acceptable.

The first one is "respect."

"No spitting, no kicking,

"No punching," and "no shouting."

If you spit and you punch,

Mommy and daddy are gonna give you discipline.

There has to be a consequence for it.

Blah, blah, blah.

Joseph, stop it.

Stop it. I've not finished talking.

Mommy and daddy are gonna say to you, "stop that behavior."

If you don't listen,

You're gonna go and sit in the naughty zone.

If you swear at your parents, there won't be no warning.

You'll go straight to the naughty zone, okay?

Karen: so from now on, we're gonna stick to the house rules.

Dad and I are both gonna do it together, okay?

You have to follow them rules.

Jason: ben, doesn't want to listen to the house rules.

He feels there's gonna be too much of a change,

'Cause at the moment, he's got a free life

Where he does what he wants, when he wants, how he wants.

Jo: I explained to jason and karen

That when their children misbehaved

And broke one of the house rules,

That there would be a place where they would go,

And that was called the naughty zone.

This is the idea.

You give your child a warning first, okay,

In a low-toned, authoritative voice.

You come down to your child's level, use eye contact,

And you firmly tell them, "no. Stop that behavior because of,"

And you explain when you give the warning.

If the behavior continues, straight into the naughty zone.

In this situation, it was important to make sure

That if their children's behavior was naughty,

That they would separate them,

Because to put them in a room together

Would make the children fight

Or they wouldn't take their discipline seriously,

And they'd start laughing at one another and egg each other on.

As a second level of discipline, I introduced confiscation boxes,

So that when they misbehaved,

A toy would be confiscated and placed in that box.

We're pulling the reins in.

What we're gonna do is give the children

Toys each to play with,

And every time one of the children come and break

Something that belongs to somebody else,

We're gonna take away one of their toys.

And the only way that they could retrieve it back

Would be to behave in a manner

That would warrant them to get their toy out of that box.

If they're really naughty and they have taken away,

Then they don't have any toys left.

Jo: it didn't take long before I was showing karen and jason

Exactly how to use the naughty zone.

Ow!

Karen, deal with that, please.

Joseph... Come down to his level.

We were in the living room, and joseph hit his sister.

And when mom gave him a warning,

He swore at her and then spit right in her face.

[ Spits ] straight away.

Joe, listen.

Watch this. He spits in your face.

You bring him in, and you say to him,

"You do not spit at anybody,

"Because that behavior is unacceptable.

Do you understand? Now you stay in this room."

Joseph was not giving in to the naughty zone.

And then all of a sudden,

He peed in the middle of the floor like a dog.

I want an apology, joe.

No!

I want an apology.

No!

If he doesn't give one, let's go.

If he can't say he's sorry for that behavior,

Then he stays in here.

Close the door and put him back in.

Don't get him.

[ Crying ]

He's gone again.

In the room. You [bleep]

[ Bleep ]

Ignore it.

Jo: I can't believe

This -year-old has just given his mom the finger.

It's just disgusting.

We've got a lock, so why can't we just lock the door

And keep him in there for his defined time?

You can't lock your kids up to control them.

Whilst joseph was in the naughty zone,

Ben swore at his mother,

And then she had to place ben into another naughty zone.

When you come out, ben, when you stop swearing, okay?

Jo: no sooner had she got one child into a naughty zone

The other one had come out of theirs.

Back in the room.

Now. Come on.

There were times when mom was really struggling

To make the naughty-zone technique work,

Because the boys were pushing the technique

To the extreme limits.

Ben, what did I say to you?

Ben...

Ben, in there now.

No.

Jo: when I saw the two boys escaping

From their respective naughty zones,

I knew karen would need my support

To enforce the technique.

It's ridiculous.

One child, one room.

Karen, you're stronger than him. Pick up your young son.

Joseph got so angry at one point

That his tantrum had worn mom down,

And she was just about to give up, and so I intervened.

Karen: that was a big relief to me,

'Cause I really felt like I was getting support.

I was very impressed with how she dealt with joseph.

Jason: I'm not too convinced that karen can continue it.

I think the desire to do it is there,

But I don't know if she'll be able to do it.

He's years old.

You're now in charge and not him.

[ Crying ]

Let me go!

Jo: it's incredibly vital that karen learns to manage

Two children in two different naughty zones at the same time.

I want you to say sorry first. Then you can come out.

No more swearing, okay?

Very quickly, ben had learned to realize

And take the consequences for his actions.

Joseph's rebellious behavior had lasted for an hour and a half

Before he gave in and realized

That mom was in charge of this situation and not little joseph.

I want you to apologize to me for your bad behavior,

And then you can come out of the naughty zone.

Karen does have a lot more work, but she's taken the first step,

And that's a milestone for karen.

Karen: joseph went in and out quite a few times,

But it was a lot less stressful than shouting at him,

And I didn't feel so wound up.

Hopefully, it can only get better from now.

Go and get a drink now, and we'll make some cakes.

Jo: now that the kids are learning to respect their mom,

They need to start learning to respect one another.

In order to get the children to focus and respect one another,

I introduced the treasure-hunt game.

Who's ready to play a game?

Me!

Me!

We're gonna do a treasure hunt, and what this is going to do

Is enable the children to advance

Their skills in working together as a team.

They're all gonna have a question to answer,

But in order to have fun and find the clues,

You have to hold hands.

Lots of praise, lots of encouragement.

Have fun with the kids doing it.

Are you ready?

Yeah!

What do you think it is, joe?

You can ask for help. Joe, spoon.

Spoon.

Spoon. Are you all in agreement?

All right.

Karen: I thought the treasure hunt was really good,

And it was really nice to see them working together

Instead of arguing and shouting at each other.

It was lovely to see that they could get on together.

Jo: it's enjoyable to be able to see them interact

And not start beating each other up and swearing at one another.

Very refreshing.

Do you know where you're going? Who's the leader?

Go then.

Whoo!

You found it!

You're doing really well.

Got to look high and low.

Found it!

What we gonna do now?

We're gonna find the treasure.

And what you gonna be as?

Team! Yay!

"The treasure lies in the living room

Guarded by the lady in blue."

That's jo jo.

Oh! What's that?

What's it, ben?

Invitation.

"For ben, lauren, josh, and joe, out for lunch.

Lots of fun for all."

Well done, all of you.

Jason: the treasure hunt was a complete success.

The children worked together.

They saw their parents giving them praise and encouragement,

And at the end of it, getting the treasure

About going out for a meal.

It was all positive that we worked as a team.

Coming up on...

Jo's trip to england starts to pay off,

And karen is faced with gettig the kids to school on time.

They should have been up minutes ago.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good

Go upstairs now.

Jo: because the children are so rebellious and take so long

To get ready in the morning, mom has got to start preparing

Breakfast and lunch the night before.

Jo: getting your kids into the car in the morning

Is absolutely chaotic.

Yeah, it's chaos.

It's crazy.

And the only way we're gonna stop that

Is to have some organization

And for you to start prepping stuff the night before

So that your mornings run smoothly.

Jo: so this is a follow-on from last night.

I need you to keep organized.

Make sure that you tell the children your expectations

For them in the morning so that they can meet them.

Let them know, "now we're going to get dressed.

"Now we're gonna brush our teeth.

Now we're gonna come downstairs and put our shoes on."

Okay, let's get the boys up,

Because they should have been up minutes ago.

Come and have your breakfast now.

You got to go to school soon.

Ben, it's time to get up. Come on.

Jo: so, karen, praise and reward

The children sitting at the table,

Having their breakfast, 'cause they're doing as they're told.

If when one of them finishes, you direct the child

To go straight upstairs and get dressed, okay?

Here's clothes, and I want you to put them on

And get dressed like a real big boy.

And then come and tell mom that you've done it.

Lauren. These are your clothes, joe.

Okay, so get joe dressed.

Give him lots of praise and encouragement

While you're doing it.

"Good boy. Put your other leg in.

Jump, jump, jump!"

Clever boy. You got your sock on.

You're clever.

I've never seen him do that before.

No, I haven't.

Get in the bathroom.

That's it. Going good, karen.

You're doing good. All in, teeth brushed.

Okay, praise for ben 'cause he's doing very well.

Well done.

Because we've been such a good boy,

Do we now have time to sit and read the paper?

Ooh!

How about that?

You've done really well this morning.

And we're actually on time. We're really early.

Yay!

Yay!

Give me five, partner.

Yeah!

Yeah!

Karen: it does feel like a new bunch of kids.

It doesn't seem like my children anymore.

Sit. Seat belt on, lauren. That's a good girl.

Joshua, in the back.

Well done. Good, kids.

Well done. Put your seat belts on then.

Well done, karen.

Okay, listen, give them lots of praise

That they got into the car and behaved nicely,

'Cause that was a massive achievement,

It was.

A massive achievement.

Jo: % transformation

From what I saw the other day, completely --

From children running down the road

And running rings around mom,

She managed to get them all dressed, into the car,

And they made it to school on time

For the first time in probably a long time.

Jo jo's going. Can I have a kiss, please?

[ Smooches ]

Bye-bye, darling.

Take care, darling.

I'm gonna miss you.

See you soon.

Listen to me. Listen to me.

All of you, I want you to be good boys and girls.

Jo: I was anxious when leaving the family, 'cause those boys

Are gonna test karen and jason

When trying to enforce those techniques.

Bye!

Bye-bye.

The pair of them have got to stick together,

Knuckle down, and make it work, especially karen.

Karen: I am looking forward to doing it without jo

Just to prove to myself,

But it'll be interesting

How they'll behave tomorrow now jo's gone.

Coming up on...

Sit down.

As dad reveals his frustration...

Then no dinner.

It seems you still think that I done it wrong.

Just drop it now.

...mom has a meltdown.

I feel like he's criticizing me.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good

Jo: I've left the family for a couple of days

To get on with the techniques on their own,

But little do they know, I'm gonna be watching them.

Mom's trying to get the kids ready for school.

Let's see how she gets on.

Come on. You'll be late for school.

Joseph, now.

Look at the breakfast table. Pack lunches done. Fantastic.

Karen: I did feel a little bit panicky now that jo was gone

That I wouldn't be able to do it.

Eat up, ben. You've got minutes.

Josh, get your shoes on.

Good boy 'cause you washed your face,

And now you're all ready.

I don't know...

In the car now. Stop shouting at me.

Come on, mom. Joshua's testing you now.

Be strong and get him in the car.

[ Crying ]

That's it. Pick him up.

Take him into the car.

Let go of the drawer no.

Karen: the clock was ticking to go to school.

Josh was having a really big tantrum,

But I decided to pick him up and put him in the car

So that he knew that I wasn't gonna take any nonsens,

And it did work.

You kept strong.

You kept strong. Fantastic.

You do not do that, joseph.

Listen, if you can't talk nicely,

I'm gonna say, "do not talk at all at the table."

So if one child doesn't speak nicely,

The rest can't talk at all?

Sit down.

I'm just gonna --

Sit down. All right.

Dad, what are you doing?

Where's the warning there for joshua?

I don't have to tell you twice, joshua.

Next time someone makes fun or laughs at the table,

They're gonna go in that roo.

No, no.

You're not letting anybody breathe.

Josh can come out, and she can go in.

Lauren to the naughty zone because she's laughing.

You need to chill out.

Get in there and think about you laughing.

This is ridiculous.

Karen: what are you gonna make, jos?

Can you make a snak?

Mom, why won't you [bleep] help me?

Right. Ben, you can go in that naughty room ther.

[ Bleep ]

Ben, you don't speak to me like that, do you?

Come on.

You know

You shouldn't be talking to your mother like that.

Don't swear at me. [ Bleep ]

He's just pushing every button he can.

I'm glad to see you confiscated the video games for ben,

But why didn't you tell him you were doing that?

You should have made him watch that.

You shouldn't behae like that.

You're a big boy. It's not very nice, is i?

If I tell you you're coming n here, you are coming in here.

I want you to say sorry, ben.

Sorry.

Ah, here comes dad home from work.

It was mostly ben.

Ben was trying to encourage joe and telling joe to swear,

But it was just ben, really.

He's gone loopy.

Go straight to your bedroom now, be.

Dad, now you're disciplining ben twice

When mom has already dealt with it.

You're years old, ben, and you should know bette.

Jason, you have undermined karen's authority.

You do not leave this roo. Do you understand?

He's playing with you, karen.

Put them in the bedrom and that's it.

Come on, dad.

Karen needs encouragement and support.

Karen: if you find some little thing that I've done wrong,

You go on about i.

It seems you still thik that I done it wrong.

Just drop it now.

Okay?

Jason, whatever karen does is not good enough.

I don't really feel like jason's giving me support.

I feel like he's criticizing me.

'Cause I feel like I've worked really hard.

I'm just afraid that when jo comes tomorrow,

She's gonna just think I've done everything wrong.

[ Doorbell rings ]

Jo: when I return to the house, I sit the family down

And show them the footage of where they went wrong.

I'd like us all to take a look and see what's been going on.

Eat up, ben. You've got minutes.

And then you're gonna go upstairs and have a wash.

How great is that, karen?

It was embarrassing watching it.

They're all sitting down at the table, having breakfast.

Your tone is very upbeat. Fantastic.

Mom, why won't you [bleep] help me?

Right. Ben, you can go in that naughty room ther.

When you're getting your children swearing at you,

That's immediate confiscation and naughty zone.

So immediately, you have to tell the children

Exactly what's going to happen.

Otherwise, they're gonna start realizing

That you're being inconsistent with the discipline,

Because that is one of the house rules.

If I tell you you're coming in here, you are coming in here.

Mommy means it, ben. I'm not just saying i.

I mean it now, be.

Go straight in your bedroom now, be.

You do not leave this roo. Do you understand?

Karen's already disciplined ben for it,

And by you going and saying, "I heard you did this,

And now this is what's gonna happen,"

Means all of karen's work might as well have never been done,

Because what it's doing is undermining karen's discipline.

Your wife is on the same level as you.

Sometimes I recognize I treat her like one of the children,

Because she's not doing it the way I think it should be done.

And seeing it on there, yeah, I can see it.

Jason: I think it's now a reality check.

Karen's doing her bit. The children are trying.

They are calmed down.

It's now my turn to change,

'Cause I think everyone else has and I haven't.

It made me feel a lot more positive,

And I feel like I've done a lot of things the right way.

And I know now where I've made mistakes,

Which is really helpful for me to sort of correct.

Jo: for the rest of the day,

I'm gonna stick around the collins household

To work on any points

That I feel still require my attention.

Karen: you can't go on throwing things

Around the house, can you?

Go and pick it up.

Later on that day, mom and I saw joseph

Being destructive and unruly, so I certainly gave her support

When she walked him straight to the naughty zone.

You've got to make a mark now. Go, "I'm not having it anymore."

Enough is enough, karen. Don't put up with it.

Joe, look at me. That's unacceptable behavior.

And now you've got to go into the naughty zone.

Come on.

Come in.

Get your apology.

I want an apology and toy confiscation as well.

Short and sharp and to the point.

No cuddles. No kisses and cuddles.

You were put in this room, joseph,

Because you were misbehaving.

And if you carry on behaving like this,

You will end up back in this naughty zone every time,

And you will have your toys taken away.

Now, mommy wants an apology, please.

You're now gonna have a toy taken away.

Come on.

Karen: it's easy to take toys away now

Because I know now I'm doing it for the best.

I don't feel quite so sorry for them

Because I know in the long run,

It's gonna make all our lives easier.

Coming up on...

Jo gets riled...

I told you already that I've done it!

...and dad gets taught a lesson.

And finally, jo heads home.

So does jo jo get any hugs and kisses?

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good

Jason needs to learn how to stay calm

And in control of his anger

So that he can teach his children

How to resolve matters amicably rather than arguing.

And so I used a role-play technique with jason.

What we're gonna do today, jason,

Is make you fully aware of how you use your body

And how you use your tone of voice.

Now you've known me for awhile,

But if I actually invaded your space

And stood over you and went,

"Listen, this is what I'm telling you,"

How do you feel?

My action would be to get up and push you away.

Yeah. That's intimidating for a young child.

You're a big bloke. You're foot.

You want to be able to discipline your children

Without putting the fear of god in them.

So what I'd like to do with you is to do some role play.

I'm gonna be ben. I want you to be yourself.

Go and tidy your room.

Ben, you listening? I said go and tidy your room.

Why?'Cause I'm telling you to.

It's a mess. I'm not tidying it.

[ Exhales deeply ]

Do I have to drag you upstairs, ben?

I told you already that I've done it!

Ben, you don't shout at me.

Get up the stairs and do your bedroom now!

Stop. Stop.

Do you notice what happened there?

You came straight up to me,

And then I got defensive and started shouting back.

That is what I want you to really learn about yourself

Is that, actually, you're not teaching ben anything

If you lose it.

Jason: I learned a lot from the role play.

I learned that I didn't have to be this big, nasty person

Standing over the children,

Pointing my finger and telling them what to do.

It made me understand.

Watch how you talk. Watch how your body is.

Also, what's equally important is that you are aware

Of all the good little things

That the children are doing individually.

Jo: it's important that jason learn to give his children

An enormous amount of praise,

Because he's always been the one that's given discipline.

So he needs to balance discipline

With a lot of love and affection and praise.

The changes in behavior

Have been absolutely dramatic --

From children who were very, very rude

To children who have manners now.

So does jo jo get any hugs and kisses?

Yeah!

Karen: I never thought anyone

Would be able to sort my children out.

Their behavior was so bad.

I just couldn't believe that that could be done

In such a short space of time.

Karen, take care. Thanks.

You're welcome.

I felt really sad and horrible saying goodbye to jo,

'Cause she's been sort of my support

And we've all got really attached to her,

So that was really sad when she left.

Jason: saying goodbye to jo made me feel

A little bit upset, really,

Because she became one of the family.

Want to see confidence, want to see calm.

Yeah. Thanks for everything.

Jo: I'm very proud at how hard mom and dad have worked together

To make the changes in their family.

It wasn't an easy ride for them.

The collins family have been challenging,

But karen and jason succeeding in the techniques

Is going to give hope to all those families

That are in similar situations.

Jason: they've always said

That you can't teach parents how to be parents.

I think this is proof you can teach parents how to be parents.

Give them proper guidelines.

Karen: joseph woke up this morning and said, "mommy, I love you."

And that just felt really nice

After me being sort of tougher with him yesterday,

Trying to discipline him.

It sort of showed me that they still love you

And don't hate you for being tougher on them,

Which is really nice.

Thank you, jo jo, for coming to my house

And making my brothers disciplined and well-behaved.

Jason: previously, I didn't see them as children.

I just saw them as a mob.

But now I don't see them as that mob anymore.

I feel like we're more of a normal family now.

I'm shocked at how well-behaved they've been, actually.

We've never, ever sat down like that.

I think the children are gonna have a great future

And a great life and a happy life.

Karen: I think I'm a much better parent now.

I feel like I'm doing everything the correct way now,

Which has given me a lot of hope.

I can't remember the last time

I saw jason playing with them, really.

They all seem a lot happier. So does jason, as well.

[ Laughs ]

Yes!

It really, really has made me enjoy living,

'Cause previously I didn't really enjoy it.

We didn't have a life.

Karen: it's taught me as a parent

That you can still be a good parent

And put discipline in place,

Rather than thinking that you are a good parent

Just by letting the children do what they like,

Because in the end,

You're not really doing yourself any favors or the children.

Want me to bite his mouth off?

[ Laughs ]

He's biting my mouth.

Mom!

What?