04x06 - Dostal Family

[bunniefuu]

Tonight on "supernanny"...

Hello.hi there.

Jo meets the dostals... I don't need two people in this corner.

A couple with their marriage in crisis.

I don't feel like you're the same person that I married.

You're not exactly the same person I married, either.

And after six years together,

They're considering splitting up.

Are you in love with him?

No, and I and feel like I want to have a divorce.

We can't keep going like this.

And it's affecting the children.

No. No.

Mom lives in fear of her -year-old, zac...

No.

Ow!

Who terrorizes his younger sister. [Moaning]

And dad's got a short fuse

That sets a bad example for the boy.

Can jo save the marriage in time to save the children?

You will have no relationship with your son.

Your son won't even want to know you.

Will she be able to reach zac,

Who could really hurt someone,

Or will this family be torn apart?

You think you can help us?

Do I think I can help you?

I know I can help you.

[Crying]

♪♪♪

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Johnny ♪

♪♪♪

Well, I'm here in florida.

Let's take a look at the family I'm going to help.

Hi. We're the dostal family,

And we're from wesley chapel, florida.

I'm brenda.

And I'm bill. We have two children--

Zachary, who is ...

I hate milk. Excuse me.

And erin, who is .

Thank you, mom.

You're the best girl in the whole wide world.

Erin is a sweet little chatterbox,

But she does, uh, vie for attention.

Because zachary is in trouble a lot,

He gets a lot of attention. Go away, you stupid.

No!

[Crying]

The main issue with zac is his anger and aggression.

Aah!zac.

Zachary att*cks me.

He scratches me.

No.

He kicks me and punches me.

Zac, no!

I am scarred up, scratched up pretty severely now.

This little boy's behavior is ridiculous.

No.

I know.

[Giggling]

Are you sad, mom? I am sad, yes.

But it makes me feel like a failure as a mother.

Let go of her now. [Moaning]

[Grunting]

I think part of it is not knowing what exactly to do.

You know, we might disagree... Right.

On exactly how to discipline him.

I'm not chasing him. Zac--

I just want you to block for a second. No, I'm not blocking.

When he stop runnin', we can start a time-out, okay?

Not okay. Get on the rug. Five minutes.

It's hard to be on the same page,

When neither of us have a page.

You just gonna watch him?

Suddenly it's my responsibility.

Come on. Get in bed. Well, maybe we could communicate.

Patience is something that bill absolutely needs to work on.

I admit it. I'm not the most patient guy.

Turn the wheel the right way, zac.no.

I don't need two people in this corner.

I'll sit down when I'm ready.

I need to be more consistent. I need to be more patient.

This just isn't fair that these kids

Are being raised under such hostility.

I would say that our marriage could be in jeopardy.

I would definitely say our marriage could use help.

I think if we can get some help with being better parents,

I think we can work on our relationship at that time.

You know, I don't want to get to the point of no return.

[Crying]

What?

Supernanny, I feel like you're our last, uh, chance,

And I don't want to see this family split apart.

Please help us.

Seems like mom and dad are in dire straights.

Hold on, because I am on my way.

Hello.hi there. Come on in.

Hi. Pleased to meet you.brenda dostal.

Jo.nice to meet you.

Thank you.welcome. Come on in.

Erin, we have a visitor. Erin, how are you? Hello. Pleased to meet you.

And, zachary, come say hello to miss jo, please.

Pleased to meet you. How are you doing?good.

Good. And how old are you?

. Okay.

Bill's at work, is that right?

He is. He'll be back at :.be back at :.

Okay, so today I'm just gonna hang around.

I'm still pinching myself about... [Laughs]

Jo being here because, uh, we need the help

Just so, so badly.

I'd only been in the house for a short while,

And mom was getting the kids to make their beds,

And zac wasn't happy we were doing so,

And so he started to make trouble.

On the rug. Do you want to lose all of your blocks?

Okay, that's what's gonna happen then.

All the blocks--

No!

Ow!

[Grunting]

Zac.

Oh. Ow!

Zac--his favorite thing is scratching.

If I'm in close proximity,

Or if I'm trying to put him in time-out,

He just digs his claws in for the ride.

No. No.

Zac.

[Zac] don't.

Hands off. Hands off. Hands.

No!

[Crying]

[Cries]

[Wailing]

Mama! [Crying]

Brenda doesn't know how to address zac's discipline.

She's very fearful of how zac will react.

On the rug. Five minutes.

This rug.

Come on. On the rug. Five minutes.

I'm setting the timer.

Go away.

Give the boy an inch, and he's taken a mile,

Because he's in control of the whole thing.

Just stay on the rug, please.

Okay, I'll start it over again then.

[Zac] no, you're not!

You have seconds left.

I could see that brenda was trying to use my techniques,

But she wasn't using them effectively.

So it wasn't yielding the results.

You stayed for five minutes. Come talk to me.

Okay, and hug, please.

[Erin speaking indistinctly]

A hug.

Okay.

[Exhales deeply]

After observing zac, I could see

That all the tension in mom and dad's marriage

Wasreally having a major impact on his behavior,

And his younger sister erin, is being forgotten and ignored,

Because all the attention is needed for zac.

So I needed to find out, after six years of marriage,

What's different now?

What words would you use

To describe your relationship right now?

Detached.

Mm-hmm.

Just going through the motions, um...

At this point, our communication is so bad

That we really don't even bother

Talking about anything truly meaningful.

It seems like most of the, um, larger issues

That we try to talk about end up in an argument.

I've--i've told him that I feel like

I want to have a divorce.

I definitely have held onto this marriage

Because of the kids, and at the same time,

I sometimes wonder whether I'm doing them any favors.

You know, bill's an angry person.

One little thing can go-- not go his way, and look out.

You know, with the children, he has patience for five minutes

When he walks through the door,

And after that -minute period, it's done.

Do you love bill? I love him, and I care what happens to him.

Are you in love with him?no.

I'm just kind of numb-- partially numb right now,

Just going through the motions

And just trying to be here for the children.

[Voice breaking] trying to hold on till erin...

[Sniffles] till she's in school.

Mom's caught between a rock and a hard place

Right now with her own husband.

They've been having a little friction

Between the pair of them for many months now,

And the children are growing up in that environment,

And I think she feels guilty.

Coming up...

Zac's behavior pushes mom over the edge at a playdate.

You so stupid.

[Crying]

And mom and dad have harsh words for one another.

I don't feel like you're the same person that I married.

You're not exactly the same person

I married, either. I mean, things change.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

After I had a frank conversation about mom and her marriage,

Some of her friends brought their children around

For a playdate, but I could see that she wasreally worried

That zac was gonna start misbehaving.

[Shouting indistinctly]

Zachary, make good choices.

Good choices, zac.

Zac stomped on william's hand,

And mom saw that and put him straight into time-out,

Which made him really angry.

Not a good choice. Not a good choice.

[Grunting]

My friend dina had a talk with her son william,

And he just started blurting out

Zac had been scratching him.

If zac's behavior doesn't improve,

It could harm our friendship.

No.

[Grunting]

You stupid. Go away.

I--you so stupid. I don't want...stop.

You stupid. Go away. I--you so stupid.

I don't love you anymore.

She doesn't deserve it. Nope.

No parent deserves it.no.

It's hard to see her having such a hard time.

And to have him be at his worst

In front of all of these other children

And their parents-- my friends...

I felt like just a complete failure as a mother.

I have tried so hard to be the best mom I can be.

It's embarrassing that he's even acting like that to begin with,

Embarrassing that I can't do anything about it to change it.

I just don't know how to get him under control.

Do you think you can help us?

Do I think I can help you? I know I can help you.

[Crying]

I just realized that I was standing

Next to this woman that was completely vulnerable,

Just desperate, depleted...

And had no one to talk to,

And I hugged her, and my eyes just...

And I started to cry.

Later on in the evening, dad came home from work.

Hi. Well, hey, jo. Nice to meet you.

Hi. Pleased to meet you. How you doing?

Thank you. Even though I knew she was going to be there,

To actually see her in our home, face-to-face, was kind of, um...

[Laughs]

I don't know. Kind of shocking.

So this is good. Do you normally do this--

All sit down and have your family meal together?

Um, no. We don't normally-- occasionally.

Normally we don't.

It was obvious that these two were strained,

And the tension was really heavy.

So is dinnertime normally the time

That the pair of you discuss about each other's day, then?

[Both laugh]

Not really.

Zac, you're gonna go to your room.

These kids know when their parents are unhappy.

They know when their mom's sad.

They know when their dad's angry.

I mean, even the stuff that's not being said speaks volumes.

[Exhales deeply]

I'd already had a talk with mom.

But after all, there are two sides to any relationship,

So I thought it would be fair if I spoke to dad after dinner.

Where--where are you at personally

In your relationship at the moment with brenda?

I just don't know if we agree on the way

We're doing some things.

And then I get a little resentful

In my tone of voice, and then she hears that,

And then she's like, "stop yelling."

I'm raising my voice. She considers that yelling.

Well... And once she says I'm yelling,

Then I'm mad, 'cause she said I'm yelling.

How patient are you? [Chuckles]

Oh, you laughed. [Chuckles]

Okay, say no more. Yeah?

No, no, I definitely need more patience, without a doubt.

Yeah? So would you say that your relationship

Is in a good place right now?

No. We need some help without a doubt.

She could take the kids, go live at home

With her parents. I don't know.

Divorce? Yeah.

How do you change that?

I don't know. I-- we can't keep going like this.

Something's gotta give.

They're both not happy in their marriage.

There's a breakdown in communication

With one another.

They've both mentioned divorce,

And they both need to make some decisions

About where they're going together.

Tomorrow, I would like to sit down with the pair of you

So that one way or the other,

We can get to the bottom of these serious issues

That need to be addressed.

Lots to talk about. Lots to talk about, okay?

Mom and dad feel their children are a big issue

And are contributing towards the breakdown

Of their marriage, but actually it's themselves.

I need to push through hard with these two adults

Before I can even help them with their kids.

I'm a little nervous about hearing

What jo has to say at the family meeting,

But good or bad, I wanna know what she thinks

We need to start working on right away.

You're kids are being dragged through unstability every day.

The pair of you are just...

Coexisting with one another unhappy,

And as adults, you make those choices,

But your kids... Don't have that choice.

The behavior from both of your kids

Is behavior brought on because of the turmoil

That's going on between the pair of you.

What needs to be said at this table?

Well, i-i wanna get connected again,

Like we were before.

Now suddenly?

It's taken all this.

You've said things like that before,

And I don't know if you mean it wholeheartedly,

Or if you're willing to put...

I don't know. I don't feel

Like you're the same person that I married.

You're not exactly the same person

I married, either. I mean, things change.

Are you unhappy with me?

In some ways I am.

Then you need to tell me about these things

When I ask you if you're unhappy.

Mm-hmm.

Well...

Neither of you are talking.

I've given up trying to talk

About the things that matter the most,

Because it always ends up in an argument.

What else do you want?

I don't know.

Brenda, if you don't know what you want

In your own marriage,

How would he know any other ways?

I've written it to him before. I've spoken it to him before.

What do you want then? Tell me at this table.

Someone that's open and can communicate with me

Without getting into arguments.

Someone who is affectionate,

Who can look me straight in the eye

When we have a conversation.

[Voice breaking] I've been called names... [Sniffles]

In front of our children sometimes.

You don't treat people like that if you love them.

Do you feel loved right now?

I'm just surviving.

Does bill love you right now?

I don't really feel that way most of the time.

Say "yes" or "no."

No.

I'm sorry that she feels that way, 'cause I do.

[Whispers] okay, I said it.

There's only two places to take this forward to.

You both arein, or you've given up.

And either way, I will be able to help you,

Whatever your choice is.

There's much work to be done with the kids,

But first of all, I need to know

Whether mom and dad are gonna split up

Or whether they're gonna stay together.

So I left them to talk for the evening.

Either way, I knew that when I came back to that house,

I was gonna do everything I possibly could

To help this family.

Coming up...

Will bill and brenda stay together?

So I'm eager to find out

If you guys have spoke and come to some decisions.

Or will six years of marriage come to an end?

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

I'm really concerned about this family.

I mean, after them talking all night,

I don't know whether they're gonna stay together

Or split up,

So I was anxious to see what they would say.

So I'm eager to find out where everything lays at the moment.

I don't know if you guys had spoke

And come to some decisions.

Yes, um...

We're moving forward as a complete family, so...

[Bill] whatever I got,

I'm gonna throw it out there on that table.

Hopefully she does the same, and, uh, we can make this work.

We have lots of work to do and lots to get through.

I was relieved, to say the least,

That mom and dad have decided to stay together,

But because of all the emotional turmoil,

I don't know if mom and dad are gonna stay committed

To see things through.

I left an "x" out in the dining room area,

And that's where the kids are going to be placed

If they misbehave,

Because they were both very familiar

With moving those rugs around like aladdin--

The magic carpet game.

If they choose not to listen to you

And they continue,

Then I want you to take the child

To this "x" marks the spot here,

And when the child is sitting down,

Explain why you've placed them there.

Set the alarm for the time-- one minute per their age--

And donot communicate.

The good thing about the "x" marks the spot

Is that you can't move that spot, whereas with the rug,

They were moving it all over the place.

And then you tell them, "I want an apology."

Hugs and kisses. Don't improvise it.

It won't work.

It's a good job that I set up the naughty "x" when I did,

Because zac started to get all aggressive with his mom.

[Grunting]

[Jo] don't be feared of him. He's years old.

Just grab hold of his hands

And put him into that spot.

Okay! You're in a time-out. Come on.

No!

[Brenda] I warned you.

[Crying]

[Jo] sit him back up.

He will do as he's told, and tell him why.

I warned you once. How dare he do that to you.

How dare you do that to me. I am your mother.

He'll dig into her arms, the back of her arms,

And, uh, you know, he's drawn blood.

This is unacceptable, and i-i-- he hasn't tried that on me yet.

Whatever I can do, I'm not gonna allow it.

You will stay here for five minutes

Because of your attitude.

Okay. Go away.

Show him that you're unhappy with that.

[Beep]

Whilst zac was sitting on the naughty "x,"

Mom really confided in me

With whyshe does most of the discipline,

And I found out it's because dad is overly aggressive.

His thing is, like, squeezing really hard.

I've seen him do it. [Jo] mm. Yeah.

To--to muscle him, to bring him down.

When bill puts zac on that time-out,

That he's rough-handling him?yes.

Huh? Yeah, and I can tell by zac's cry that it's more than just...

I mean, it tells me that he's p-possibly in pain.

I am afraid to hand over discipline to bill

When I can't be there to witness it,

Because he does squeeze zac's arm, and he does muscle him,

And I don't know what he does when I'm not there.

You're gonna have that conversation with bill.

Because as long as you feel that that's going on,

You're always gonna protect him, because you're gonna

Cover up for zachy when you know he's wrong

Because you're gonna be worried about bill disciplining him.

After talking to brenda,

I realized until dad can earn mom's trust again,

Then disciplining zac

Is gonna be a real battle.

You were in time-out

Because I asked you to leave your sister alone.

I need an apology.

I need a sincere apology.

Sorry, mom.

[Whispers] okay. Give me hugs.

Hugs and kisses? Okay.

♪♪♪

[Jo] I was concerned. How would mom trust dad with zac again?

And unfortunately, I got a chance to see

Exactly what mom was talking about with my own eyes.

[Crying]

I didn't like that.

I saw dad

Handle a situation with anger and aggression.

I saw him push his son to the floor,

Where his son lay there,

Worried that he may get pushed again.

Brenda walked back into the room,

And dad wasn't completely honest about what had happened.

What are you crying about?

'Cause I told him to get off erin. 'Cause i--

He's crying because you told him to get off of her?

Told him to get off her. He's breaking her back.

[Jo] and I thought, no.

He just pushed that kid, your son, on the floor

Really aggressively.

I could not look at that and let it go. I really couldn't.

So the kids are in the bedroom at the moment

Because what I have to say, I don't want them hearing at all.

I saw behavior that shocked me--

You behaving, bill, in an unacceptable way

With... Zac.

My first reaction--to get him off as quick as I can, you know.

You pushed him full force.

You pushed him off of erin, and he lay on the floor.

He lay on the floor hurt.

I was pissed.

I was, um, definitely not a happy camper.

I felt like, you know, here we are.

Um, I am giving more than % trying to make things right,

All that I can, you know,

And it seemed like he just kind of gave up

And went back to his normal way of dealing with things.

I even asked. I said, "why is he crying?

What happened?"I said I pushed him off erin.

[Brenda] no, you didn't. How can you expect brenda

To step back and allow you to do discipline

When inside, she's worried that you're going to grab the kids,

Be aggressive with them, hurt them?

She's gonna want to protect her kids,

But from their own father?

And it's not right to get up and just behave like that

And then turn around and say to your son,

"Don't do that to your sister. Don't behave like that,"

When that's whatyou choose to do.

How hypocritical of you. And all I know

Is that if you're prepared to carry on behaving like that,

You will have no relationship with your son.

Your son won't even want to know you.

[Jo] he put his head down. He felt ashamed.

So he should.

Coming up...

Can zac learn to be gentle and tender?

And can dad keep his temper under control?

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey!

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪♪♪

[Jo] the next day, it was clear to everyone

That dad seriously needed to work on his patience and quick.

So I devised a little exercise to help him develop that virtue.

What I thought I'd do with you today

Is to work on your patience,

Because you have none, and you need some. All right?

So we're gonna start here.

To help dad, I run a string through the house

And attached cards

In areas where dad needs to be more patient.

To retrieve the cards,

Dad has to untie each and every knot in the string.

I was just thinking, while you're doing that,

I was just gonna look at my e-mails.

Do you think you could just put me on the computer? Oh, sure. Okay.

But as he started to untie the knots,

I wanted to create a distraction for him.

[Jo] so which one do I press?what's that?

Uh, which one do i-- how do I get into the...

Sorry.[Bill] here.

He got the message straightaway.

He laughed it off, you know. The kettle was going off.

[Kettle whistles][jo] can you get that, bill?

I got it. I got it.please?

"Oops. I accidentally dropped something on the floor.

Oh, I need to clear that up."

[Thud]oh, I'm sorry.

[Laughs]

Hey. Don't--wait. Don't trip on that. You'll--you'll slip.

Huh? Have you got anything to clear it up with?

Yeah. Here.

I thought it was good. Made me just try to stay calm,

Go one knot at a time, and finally, you know,

It's, like, man, I made it to the end.

Of course, the last one, there's gonna be two knots.

You know, it felt good getting done.

I'd like you to refer to these as a visual reminder...sure.

Of the things that you need to work on.

Good work there.all right. Thank you.

♪♪♪

[Jo] after speaking to bill, I felt that he was bringing home

A lot of pent-up frustration from work,

And that led to a lot of conflict

With his wifeand his kids.

So I come up with an idea that would really help him.

What we're gonna do is this.

When you come home from work this evening,

You will find a mailbox.

And what I would like you to do is to write down

The things that have been really awful for you,

And when you get to your postbox,

To literally slip it through the postbox and trash it.

Get rid of it. And what you're going to do

Is to think of the positive.

So I would like you to leave positive notes

Of what's happened during your day.

I think the mailbox is a-a really special technique.

I hope that bill sees it as being a helpful tool

To let him get rid of the bad thoughts

And be a different person as he comes through the door

And a better dad.

♪♪♪

With dad off at work, it was time to address

The serious violent behavior with zac.

So I came up with this little funny game

To help zac be more tender and loving.

Mommy's going to touch you with one of those things,

And you have to guess what it might be.

Oh, that's easy for me.

Great.

He could hardly contain himself because he was so anxious

To guess at which-- which item it was.

♪♪♪

Yeah!

It's the feather!

You want to guess?

Yes.

It was this.

Okay. Mommy's gonna do one more, okay?

Both of you close your eyes.

Now you have to feel the next touch, okay?

Aw. It was your hand.

Yes, it was.

Mm. Yeah. I thought the touching game was wonderful

Because he really got to appreciate

What gentle touch feels like.

Let mommy--mommy feel what that touch feels like.

Is that a nice touch, mommy?very nice.

Teaching gentle touch instead of the aggressive things

That zac is used to doing with his hands--

That was a great game.

Zac, did you enjoy that game?mm-hmm.

The touching game was fun.

It is really important that we always are kind with our touch,

And you felt what that felt like

When you have nice things on you.

It was just a really kind of cuddly special moment

When they were in his bedroom,

And I just felt it would be a really positive way

To reinforce the nice touch between the pair of them

And not what they were used to on a daily basis.

I want to play it again. I want to play it again. That--that's nice, right?

That's a nice touch. Yeah.

[Jo] bill should be home soon, right?

When dad came home from work, it was time to see

Whether the good thoughts mailbox technique

Was going to work.

[Jo] hello.hey.

I wrote a couple issues down that, uh, were bugging me

At work, and I don't want to bring them into the house.oh, I like it.

I threw 'em in the mailbox, and before I even threw it

In the mailbox, I saw a note from brenda.

So that kind of get me in a good mood, you know,

That hey, something good went hap--good happened here at home.

"Zac and erin both stayed successfully in time-out." Good.

Yeah, I like the mailbox. [Laughs]

Really good.

♪♪♪

I'm going for a few days.

I want to see you guys for homework.

Dad, it goes without saying.

Those black clouds you need to work on, all right?mm-hmm.

Patience and your anger, okay?

Mom, confidence,

Following through with the discipline,

Communication.

You're in the relationship together.

Okay? This is not about knocking each other down.

This is about saying what's on your chest

So you can work through it, okay?

I am nervous a little bit in the sense that, uh, you know,

There's nobody there to steer us in the right direction.

If we're veering off the path, you know,

It's gonna be up to brenda and myself

To get us back on the path.

Any questions for me before I leave?

Do you have to go?yes.

I'm definitely not ready for her to leave yet,

But I do know that it's time to practice it on our own.

See you in a few days.

Okay, I'm not liking it, but... [Laughs]

All right.bye.

Bye-bye.

Coming up...

Have mom and dad made a breakthrough?

...to forget. It's okay.

Not have it yet. [Bill] it's all right.

Or will dad lose his patience again?

Hey! Think what you're doing.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪ and now a tip from supernanny.

Are your kids like you in the morning--

Can't make up their mind what they're going to wear?

Then help them make a choice. Pick out three outfits

And let them choose which ones they want to wear.

It will will build confidence when making choices.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good ♪

It's been four days since I've left bill and brenda,

And I'm really anxious to see how they've got on without me.

So how are we both feeling?

Good. It was good. Great.

Yeah? Are we ready to take a look...sure.

At the footage here? Okay.

Hey. Hey!

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[Blows bubbles] [bill] zac, no more of that.

Zac, think what you're doing. Think what you're doing.

Think, think, think.

Zac, you don't throw it at her. Zac.

[Bill] hey, hey, hey.

Don't do that again.

You don't spit in other people's plates.

That's a warning. It dripped on the table. Yes!

Do you hear me?

Yes!

Watch your attitude

How do you talk to me? In a kind way, right?

Your frustration and anger

Come out before you give him a warning.

Your tone is abrupt. He barks back,

And when he does that, your hand goes on him, say, "hey."

And he looks. "Get off."

And you can see your relationship there.

Still needs work on.

Without a doubt.

[Crying]

Excuse me. Do not touch your sister again... No.

Or you're in time-out. This is your warning.

[Speaks indistinctly] say, "yes, mom."

Yes, mom. Thank you.

[Zac] erin. [Erin crying]

Come here. You're in time-out. Over here. [Grunting]

I asked you to not hurt your--

[Blowing raspberry]

I asked you not to hurt your sister.

You did it again anyway.

Sit there five minutes for time-out.

Are you leaving me here?!

[Erin] why does he do that?

I don't know. Don't talk to him. He's in time-out. Erin.

I asked you to keep your hands to yourself,

And you did not listen to me.

That's why you were in time-out, right? Yes.

You have to apologize to me first... S-sorry, mom.

For not listening. Sorry, mom.

Okay, that was absolutely brilliant. It really was.

You didn't care what strangers were thinking.

You was totally focused on making sure that you were

Able to give zac a very clear warning

If he continued to misbehave, and you did that.

And the confidence level here, is just amazing, brenda,

Because he knows that it doesn't matter where you are,

You're gonna have the confidence

To be able to follow through with that,

And that was very apparent when watching this.

Feeling good with yourself?

Yes, very good. Yeah, good. So you should. So you should.

♪♪♪

Hmm. No note.

[All laugh]

[Brenda] oh.

Bill. Yeah?

Did you put an entry into the mailbox? Mommy!

Yeah. I didn't see any note. Oh, I'm so sorry.

Yeah, I figured that--you know, I figured, well... Yeah.

You either got busy or nothing good happened.

Sorry. I didn't mean to forget. That's okay. That's all right.

Not have it yet. That's all right.

Oh, there we go. So the postman forgot the post,

But I see how you're using this very well, bill,

And I'm really, really pleased.

The fact that you have really got this underneath your belt,

Where you've trained yourself to say, "right. No.

"I'm gonna write this down. I am gonna let go of this

And just post it," you know?

[Whispers] attaboy. [Laughs]

I've seen some really good stuff.

I am really, really pleased with the progress.

There is lots of stuff that I still

Want to work with the pair of you on doing,

Because they're things that are really going to tweak

What we've already learned

And how we move on and elevate it to the next level

And continue the groundwork we've already done

Once I've left, and that's what's important.

So let's close down this dvd.

Are we both ready to put in some more?

I feel we should be. I feel really enthusiastic about this.

You're doing really, really good. Okay, let's go.

Coming up...

Will dad be able to regain zac's trust?

I want you to go straight for about ten steps.

And what brings jo to tears?

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪♪♪

[Jo] trust is an issue with dad and zac,

So I'm going to work on a little game

Called "the th hole" to build trust between the pair of them

And have fun at the same time.

The game is about you finding the golf balls

And putting them into the th hole

By listening to daddy, okay?

Because you're going to have a blindfold on.

That sounds tricky.

Yes, it may sound tricky, but what you need to do

Is to use your ears to listen.

Can you see anything?

Okay, I want you to go straight for about ten steps.

Okay, stop.

I really am thinking, slow down, you know, put my mind frame

In that -year-old's head,

And that helped me be patient with all the, uh...

Put the ball straight out. Oh, where's the bucket?

Absolutely fantastic. Good listening.good job.

Dad had done an amazing job giving zac direction,

But now it was time to turn those tables and see if dad

Did just as well receiving direction.

Then. Three steps forward.

[Whispers] okay, now. That's enough.

All right. Now what? Bend down.

N-no, lean forward a little to your left.

Did you get it? You--you got one.ah!

Working one-on-one with zac helped us realize

That, uh, we need to listen to each other.

Left or right? Go right? Tell me when to stop.

Yeah, there. Perfect. Yeah! You got one!

Good. Give daddy a hug! You both did well.

[Speaks indistinctly] good job!

[Jo] huh?good directions, buddy. Where are you? I can't see you.

It was a good game in patience-- and the one-on-one,

Having a good time with one another--

I really liked doing that, and I want to do more of it. Good job!

All right! [Jo] good teamwork there!

♪♪♪

Sure, you can.

I'll open it for you. Thank you, zac.

[Brenda] oh, wow.oh, please, zachary.

How wonderful, huh?

I knew once we got zac's behavior under control

And improved his relationship with dad,

That erin would get the attention that she deserved

But was not receiving.

All right. [Brenda] all right.

Guys, this makes me so very happy

To see you acting like this.are you proud of us?

Very proud.i'm very proud about zachary.

It was just so wonderful to be able to see him

Be so loving towards his sister.

Thank you.good sharing.

And that's true to the credibility

Of his parents really working with him

For the time that I've been there.

Are these the same children?

There's more stability,

And that has brought upon a more contented child.

Aw, are you gonna share that with me?

Thank you very much, jo jo's nose is running.

Jo jo's crying because she's really happy.

She is?yeah, tears of joy.

[Brenda] oh. Jo jo's really happy 'cause I'm so proud of you.

Zac, I'm so proud of you.

Come on, you guys. Get in here.

You know what?

Ultimately for me, that's just priceless,

Absolutely priceless, and--and it did.

It made me feel very emotional and very tearful.

Sensitive me.

Oh, I've got lipstick on you now. [Bill] uh-oh.

Got lipstick on you.

Jo has changed my life for sure,

Um, and changed the lives of our children

Because, uh, she's changed the way I relate to them.

Bye-bye.bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

I like jo jo.

I say bye-bye to you. Oh, wow. That's a big hug.

Don't--don't hurt her.let her go, buddy.

Thank you, jo jo.

Take care. Take care.

I don't want her to go. [Laughs]

She's the real deal. She wants the best for everyone,

And she's an amazing person.

Thank you so much. You're welcome.

I'm gonna miss you terribly.

You're gonna do fine, because you're gonna use

Everything that you've been taught, okay? Hey, bill?mm-hmm.

Take care of this woman. You take care of this man, okay?yeah, I will.

Take care of your kids, all right?

Thank you. Thank you for everything.

When I first walked into this house,

I met a family that were talking divorce

And now this family are working on a future,

And with love back in the house

And them working on the techniques,

They're all gonna be in a much happier place.bye-bye.

Bye-bye. Bye.

♪♪♪

Ah!is it cold?

Yeah.

[Brenda] there is definitely more joy in our family today.

There's absolutely more smiling going on

And more laughter and, uh, more good times.

You gotta help daddy. Kick. There you go.

What I see for my family in the future--

Less fighting in the house, less arguing,

Less tantrums.

Go. [Blows air]

Whoa![Laughs]

I know a lot of that is gonna start from me,

But not using my hands or my voice, trying to be calm.

I want to go on your shoulders now.

Erin first, okay? Here. You can go next.

By taking these baby steps, we do take it one day at a time.

And by doing that, not seeing a huge mountain in front of you,

Um, you can have more fun along the way.

Turn. Turn. Nice. No!

I thought that was in.

I think we're a stronger family,

Starting with brenda and myself.

Ahh! Boy.

That's a nice one.

Brenda and I can show the love, the happiness

And how to act towards one another, and they do the same.

Thank you.

Jo's given us the tools to work on our marriage.

We have those tools now.

We just gotta use them to the full extent.

[Bill] I'm very thankful for this process.

Jo has changed my family immensely,

And, uh, I love her for-- for doing that for us.

♪♪♪

♪ A, b, c, d, e, f, g ♪

♪ H, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p ♪

♪ Q, r, s ♪

♪ T, u, v ♪

♪ W, x, y and z ♪

♪ Now I know my a-b-c's ♪

♪ Next time won't you sing with me? ♪

♪ Baa, baa, black sheep ♪

♪ Have you any wool? ♪

I can't sing that song.