04x07 - Daniels Family

[bunniefuu]

Tonight on "supernanny"...

Jo meets the daniels family... Hi.

Six out-of-control kids and one checked-out mother.

[Screams] they hit, spit...

[Spits] don't!

Swear... [Bleep]

And thr*aten... [Sobs] shut up, before I k*ll you!

And mom responds by shutting down and hiding.

"We've got six kids, you know.

We just don't know how to do it."

Take responsibility for it. This family pushes jo further than ever before.

You want me to come down and talk on your turf? [Bleep]

Can jo get this mother to start being a parent to her children?

You might as well not be here

If you're not gonna be a good mom.

Or has mom given up for good? I want a break.

Come here. Come here. Come here. No!

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Johnny ♪

♪♪♪

So let's see what I'm heading for this time.

Hi. I'm lisa daniels. This is my husband steve,

And we have six children.

[Steve] our youngest is brynleigh. She's /. Aah!

Irelyn is ... Breakfast.

And alisen is .

[Lisa] next is alexus. She's . Aah!

Alexus, eat in quiet.

Halley is ...

And the oldest is our only son josh, and he's .

Steve works full-time.all right, I'll be back.

[Steve] I own my own insurance brokerage,

And lisa's at home with all six kids all day.

Shut up!shut up.

I don't know what I'm gonna do

With my children and the way that they're acting.

[Sobs] shut up, before I k*ll you!

Seven minutes. Don't talk. [Laughs]

They know how to push me around,

And I just don't know how to control 'em anymore.

Six kids and one mom who's given up.

Halley's probably the most difficult of them all.

You're stupid.

That means you're fat.[Spits, laughs]

[Lisa] she's actually gotten to be very conniving,

Talks back.

Actually,

She has much attitude towards us.

I'm gonna s*ab you with this Kn*fe. You know what?

For talking like that, I'm gonna duct tape your mouth.no!

[Steve] alexus is very high-strung,

Very hyper little girl. Don't be mean to him.

Alexus, I'm not gonna chase you.

[Steve] she's like a wild animal... [Lisa] alexus.

A reptile. [Growling]

Shh!she says offensive things to people.

You're an [bleep].

[Bleep]

[Barks] [bleep] [barks]

Alexus, stop it.

I'm just really tired of dealing with it. [Sniffles]

Well, when I come home, I feel things are out of control,

And I'm always faced with having to deal with things.

What's going on? Nobody knows what's going on unless you talk.

I feel like I'm the one who's having

To take control of my home. No talking. Just--

[Speaks indistinctly] no.

What do we do for dinner? I don't know. It's your night. You can do it.

[Steve] dinnertime is out of control every day.

We never sit down and eat as a family.

[Lisa] as soon as you're done eating,

I'll start your timer.[Lisa] there's fighting, yelling, food throwing,

[Spits]

[Spits]ew. Ew.

Oh. [Steve] what's with the food all over the floor?

[Halley] they're having a food fight.

We're both at our breaking point with the kids.

What do you think you're doing?pfft!

Nothing we do is effective.

We're, of course, spreading ourselves so thin

That we can't give the attention

That each one of them deserves to have.

[Alisen] shut up! [Steve] ali.

[Girl] god.

This is sad--really, really sad.

We've got a house full of people

That are completely disconnected.

[Lisa] I would love

To get everything working together again...

And just be a quiet, getting-along type family

With no yelling.

[Sniffles]

Supernanny, bring it on. We need your help.

We need somebody to come change the recipe for us,

'Cause what we're doing is not working.

Well, mom may have given up, but I certainly haven't.

I'm on my way.

♪♪♪

[Gasps] jo jo! Hello.

Hi.

Hi. Pleased to meet you. I'm jo.i'm lisa.

Hi.come in.

Thank you.[Lisa] don't talk. You're in your time-out. Quiet.

Having jo walk in the house kinda made me feel

A little upset that I had one on time-out.

A house full of children. Hi. I'm gonna ask you

To wear that today so I can remember who you all are.

Studies show that less than % of american families

Are as large as lisa and steve's.

They've definitely got their hands full with six kids.

[Girl] I hate you.

[Girl] mommy.[Speaks indistinctly]

So, josh, what do you do with your days then?

Play on the computer. Uh, go over to my friend's house.yeah? Well, you've got

Quite a few sisters to contend with, right?

Do you get on better with one than the other,

Or do you get on with all of them?

Um, I don't get along with any of 'em.

You don't get along with any of them?

No, not really.

Being the only boy in the house is... Boring.

♪♪♪

Calm down.

[Laughs]

[Girl screams]

So alexus' behavior unfolds from hitting and slapping

And standing on her sister's back...

To spitting in her sister's face.

[Spits and laughs]

Halley, does your sister spit all the time at you?

Yeah.

And that, for me, is just disgusting. It really is.

Get out of my closet.[Spits]

Don't!

[Spits]stop!

I know that mom and dad think halley is a troublemaker,

But from what I see, it seems that halley

Spends most of her time defending herself from alexus.

[Halley] you are one sick kid.

[Lisa] open the door.

Ow. She's spitting on me. Out of daddy's office. Get out.

Mom, she's spitting.

I don't know why you're running around. She's spitting.

Okay, go sit on the couch. [Halley] can't you hear her going... [Imitates spitting]

Mom tolerates it, and that's why alexus is as wild as she is.

[Speaks indistinctly] [spits]

Stop![Laughs]

She's spitting on me.

You girls need to stop. Halley, you're grounded today.

Didn't I ask for your help, halley,

Putting all this stuff away? Mom tells me that she keeps halley busy with chores

So that she keeps her out of trouble,

But what does she keep alexus busy with?

You can start with that to keep you busy.

You need to grab all that and pick it up.

[Lisa] halley, load up and rinse off the dishes.

Sheets need to be folded, clothes need to be put away.

That's your chore, halley. Do it now.

Halley's fully aware that she's being treated

Very differently to the rest of her sisters and brother,

And she's now rebelling towards that.

So what do you do in the house?

Like, what's your responsibilities?i do a lot of chores.

You do a lot of chores?mm-hmm.

Your other brothers and sisters--

They do a lot of chores?i do the most.

Do you?mm-hmm.

Yeah. How come you do the most then?

My mom usually gets mad, and so I help.

Her mother tends to vent all her frustration out on halley.

They're not gonna be close

If she continues to behave like this.

Do you think your family's happy?

When halley and I were talking,

I saw josh go up to his bedroom to be alone,

So I decided that I would have a conversation with him as well.

So what are you doing today? Anything?

Huh? Huh?

Just your computer?

Yeah.

And what kind of things do you do on the computer

Um, play a game with all my friends.

You know, everything I asked josh, you know,

"What do you do?" "Well, not much. Don't know really."

I mean, these kids are not stimulated mentally.

They just kind of doss around the house all day

And put themselves in front of computers and do nothing.

Towards the latter part of the afternoon,

I realized that mom wasn't around,

And I looked for her

And found her in steve's study,

And she was very emotional.

Right now I just feel like there's nothing I can do,

And I'm better off just staying--not dealing with it.

I almost wanna put them in boot camp. I hate to say it.

I don't know if that'll even help them.

I think they're beyond control.

[Jo] I mean, how crazy, really, is that?

This mother's ready just to throw the towel in

And just say, "somebody else, take 'em."

Coming up on...

Mom tries to shut jo out...

I'm done talking about that right now.well, I'm not done, by far.

And later, mom pushes jo too far...

You want me to come down and talk on your turf? [Bleep]

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪♪♪

Halley and alexus have been told that they're grounded.

[Jo] who's in the pool?

Alexus?[Halley] mm-hmm.

But you're-- you're not allowed in?

She's told you to stay out-- mom has.

What kind of message does that send to the rest of the kids

When one parent disciplines one and not the other?

Mom? Can I just ask you something, lisa?

Why halley's here.

We had an issue with her mouth,

So I grounded her forever from the pool.

Grounding halley from the pool forever?

I mean, that's an empty thr*at

That mom's never gonna carry through.

The kids are never gonna take her seriously.

You just ground them for a few days, not forever.

I've got another one out there

That is not supposed to be in the pool,

And she's not listening to me, so I'm gonna wait on daddy--

When he comes home-- to see if he can get her out.

Alexus is out of control,

And mom feels that she can't even deal with her,

So she doesn't bother to attempt anything.

These kids are realizing that actually--

Their mom doesn't care, that she doesn't have anything to say.

"She's not worried about what I do.

I can come and go as I please."

[Steve] hello, hello.[Jo] oh, there we go.

Hi, halley.hi. Pleased to meet you. Jo.

Hi. Nice to meet you, jo. [Jo] when dad arrived home, it was dinnertime,

And I had just spent a completely unstructured day

With this family, so I wasn't surprised

That dinnertime was total chaos as well.

[Steve] here. You want some, too?

Is this yours?yeah.

Wake up. [Spits]

Is that food on the top of your head there?

Yeah, by your eyebrow.[Alexus laughs]

[Jo] the daniels have this huge dining room

That's completely unused.

Mom and dad eat dinner in front of the television.

What do you want to watch? The kids eat in the kitchen,

And the younger ones don't even eat at all.

Kids not hungry? Yeah, probably because they've been upstairs

Eating chips.

You know, like I said, it's ridiculous.

♪♪♪

Okay, so it has been a really good day for me.

I've been able to seea lot. There's lots to discuss,

So get a good night's sleep, because tomorrow morning,

The three of us will have our family meeting.

This family truly do need help.

It's like mom and dad are minding the kids

Instead of engaging and interacting.

I mean, you have six kids because you chose to have kids,

Because you wanted six kids, right?

And now your kids are here. You're doing nothing with them.

They need to take ownership

And earn that title of being a parent.

♪♪♪

I'd like to say to the pair of you

That it was obviously a very conscious decision

To have six children.

You have the label "parents,"

But when did you decide that you wouldn't parent?

[Clears throat] what do you mean by that?

Where did you get to the point

Where it was easier to just give up?

You have children that are out of control,

And you clearly did give up, lisa.

You clearly did go,

"I'm out of here."

Yeah, I did. I mean,

They don't listen. They don't listen to me.

We know what we're doing's not working,

But every time we try something new,

It just doesn't--it doesn't work out, so, you know?

But the first thing that I noticed straightaway--

I want to discuss halley

And your relationship with halley, lisa. Okay.

A mom that's very unfair,

And numerous amounts of times yesterday,

I watched you put chores onto halley

That neither of the other children had.

It was, "halley, do this. Halley do that.

What are you doing lounging?"

'Cause she's the one that causes most of the problems.

Your other children were playing up and misbehaving,

And yet nothing was done with them.

Well, we've got a lot of major issues with her.

Just because she shows you the capacity to take

What you put on her shoulders, it doesn't mean

That she deserves to be treated like that.

I'm done talking about that right now.

Well, I'm not done, by far, about talking about it.

I see a detachment

With you and halley that's really unhealthy,

And the way you're treating her is wrong.

Yesterday, when it came to alexus and halley

Being in trouble, there was halley inside the house,

Whilst alexus was out in the poolside.

I couldn't get her out of the pool.

I mean, what do you want me to do? Jump in and grab her out?yeah. Yeah.

The fact is, is that you're lazy,

And you don't do nothing about it.

We can't get 'em to do what we ask them to do.

Who's gonna change that, unless you guys do?

But what I'm not seeing from the pair of you is a willingness

To take responsibility for what's happened here.

Instead, you wanna go, "well, that's how it is.

We've got six kids, you know. We just don't know how to do it."

Take responsibility for it. Let's talk about family time.

We try and do our--our family time, but it doesn't work out.

Right now nothing works out, lisa.

I mean, what--what did you do with the kids yesterday,

Where you were spending even time with two of them?

I didn't have time yesterday.

What was you doing, then? Picking up,

Running around, making them lunch, making them breakfast.

Well, that--that's what every other mother does, lisa.

You make time. You sit down

And--and you have fun with your--with your kids.

I mean, isn't that why you had six kids?

Didn't you want to be a mother... Yeah.

And have relationships with each one of your kids?

And that really concerns me

Because they need your love.

How much do you know about your kids?

You know, i--we do a lot more with our kids

Than I think you think we do.

Eight hours with the tv on, the computers, the video games.

I mean, really, it's a babysitter.

Dinnertime--nobody eating around the table

Together as a family.

No core. Well, you know, we try to eat together as a--as a family,

But everybody's screaming and throwing this

And crying and needing to go to a time-out and...

You know, despite what you're seeing on the outside--

The temper tantrums, the shouting--

They want the rules. They want the expectations.

They need that guidance.

I'm willing to try anything.

Lisa.

I'm willing to--to try and get it to work.

I just feel like, uh...

[Sniffs] like there's nothing we can do to...

Change.

But I know that if you're willing

To have some faith in what we're about to do here...

[Sniffles]

And you're prepared to step up,

That we can make some serious changes here.

It's gonna be hard work because you've spent

So many years getting it to this place.

So are we ready? I'm ready.

Yeah?

Okay, let's go then.

Coming up on...

Mom has a meltdown...

[Lisa] I want a break.come here. Come here. Come here.

And jo fights back...

You want me to come down and talk on your turf? [Bleep]

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪♪♪

Hello.

[Jo] there's a real disconnect

Between these parents and their children.

Dad's in total denial of how little time

They spend with their kids, and mom's completely given up.

So the first thing I want to do

Is to show them that there's a real problem here.

Okay, everybody take their seats, please.

Yay!

So the idea of this game is to understand our family.

Do we know our children very well?

Oh, rather silent at the back,

Wouldn't you say, children?

Do we think that our contestants at the back

Are going to do a pretty good job

In understanding who we are?

Oh, not very promising.

For this game, I asked the kids a group of simple questions,

Which I then posed to mom and dad,

Just to see how well they knew their children.

"What does ali want to be when she grows up?"

Lisa?

I'm gonna take a guess

And say she wants to be a singer.

A singer, and the answer is...

Teacher.

[Jo] a teacher.

It wasn't very successful, to be honest with you.

I'm gonna go with pink. [Buzzer]

[Steve] enchiladas. [Buzzer]

I'm gonna go with pizza. [Buzzer]

It was kind of hard that we weren't getting a lot

Of the most important things correct.

Uh, uh, I'd have to say dog. [Buzzer]

Her favorite animal is a cat. [Buzzer]

I'd have to say disneyland. [Buzzer]

I wasn't surprised that they didn't do that well.

The whole idea of this was

To get a grasp of really the reality

Of how much time you spend together as a family

And how much you really know about your kids

With regards to the things that interest them,

And I think really, we can see that we've still got work to do.

It was another rude awakening.

I love my kids, but how much do I really know about them?

And that was--that was tough.

[Jo] now it's time to tackle

One of the biggest issues facing this family.

They've got no clear ground rules for behavior,

And that's discipline ,

And it needs to be addressed now.

Okay, we have rules.[Girl] come on.

[Lisa] um...[Steve] listen up, okay?

And these are the rules that you guys are gonna follow.

The first one is no swearing.

[Jo] most of the children reacted really well

To the new rules. They were very attentive,

And they seemed to realize that mom and dad meant business.

But bryn started to throw a temper tantrum,

And she didn't want to sit on the couch.[Crying]

Okay, stop her, stop her. Bring her over here.

Bring her over here and say to her,

"If you do not listen to daddy,

You will be going on time-out."

[Jo] bryn was really playing up. I mean, she's / years old.

She does know what she's doing, and it is time

To be teaching bryn about boundaries

And behavior and consequences.

"Now go and sit down" and take her back over there.[Crying]

Go and sit down on the couch. Take her back over.

I was shocked because bryn normally doesn't do that,

But I realized that she was doing that

Because it was the first time

That somebody's ever... Laid that boundary for her,

To say, "no, you will listen.

You will do what I ask you to do."

[Wailing] bryn, bryn, because you didn't listen to me

And sit on the couch,

You're gonna go on a time-out now, okay?

[Jo] all right, come over here. Bring her over here.

Okay.

[Brynleigh] I don't wanna sit over here, mommy!

So now what you've done is just pacify it, okay?

I'd like you to take her back, all right,

And explain why she was placed on that step, okay?

'Cause right now, missy here is not a china doll.

[Crying] mommy! Okay, she didn't listen-- she didn't listen,

And she disrespected you, and now you're gonna teach her.

[Brynleigh wailing]

I know she's showing me

The process of when you discipline her,

But I was frustrated with-- with it 'cause it's hard

To have her crying, um, when you're trying to discipline her,

When she's supposed to be your baby.

Take her. Take her. Don't watch it. Take her.

[Continues wailing]

Take--take her back. Back.

All right.

[Coughs] you don't like what's going on right now, do you?

No, and she's not usually like this.

You know why? You know why? Do you know why?

Because you pussyfoot around her, that's why.

Because you allow her to behave this way,

And now look what she's showing you.

Do you want to be a good mom? Then you be one.

Then you be one, 'cause you might as well not be here

If you're not gonna be a good mom.

It's a real tough situation for lisa.

She's not prepared to have a backbone.

She doesn't want the backbone.

[Screaming]

Mom wanted to quit, and she walked away from the situation

And completely went off the handle.

[Lisa] I am telling you right now, she is never like that.

I want a break. Come here. Come here. Come here.

N-no! She's not like that.[Steve] lisa. Lisa. Lisa.

Up here. Come here. Dad, take care of the kids, please.

Now sit down and eat.

I was really concerned that she maybe has given up.

[Sighs]

You asked me to come in and help you, right? Huh?

Yeah, but not to make my -year-old like that.

Wait. I'm not making your -year-old--you are.

She's not like that.

You are.

You are.

Coming up on...

Mom pushes jo too far.

If you want me to come down and talk on your turf?

[Bleep]

And you know it, and I know it.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

[Brynleigh screaming]

I am telling you right now, she's never like that.

I want a break. Come here. Come here, come here.

[Steve] lisa. [Lisa] n-no!

I've helped a lot of families,

And it's never easy for them to listen to cold, hard facts,

But if mom wants results, then she's gonna need to change.

I mean, let's face it. I mean business here.

There's no free rides.

You asked me to come in and help you right? Huh?

Yeah, but not to make my -year-old like that.

Wait. I'm not making your -year-old--you are.

You know, this is no time for games.

There's jeopardy here.

These kids really need two strong parents,

And whilst I was talking to one who was prepared to give up

And didn't want to do anything,

There was dad downstairs continuing with the time-out

And making a commitment to change.

I know. As soon as you finish your time-out,

We'll eat lunch, okay?

The fact that you give her boundaries--

It doesn't mean that you love her any less,

But it means that no is no.

Look at me. You have to sit here until your time-out is over.

I'll keep bringing you back here until you do.

If you don't think about the choices you make,

And they're not smart decisions--

You're making choices for six other kids out there as well.

That's a hell of a responsibility.

Seeing her deal with this the way that she has,

Versus the way that I'm embracing this, is--

It's a little frustrating.

Your time-out is up, okay?[Crying] okay.

Give me a hug, and we'll go eat our lunch, okay?

Okay. Okay?

Even after our conversation,

Lisastill wasn't prepared to take responsibility.

If, uh, you guys can... Back off?

I'm not backing off.

I-i haven't--you need to do this.

Yeah, but having you guys here is making her frustrated.

No, it's not. [Bleep] and you know it, and I know it.

Okay? You want me to come down to your language

And talk on your turf? [Bleep]

You're putting up this wall, and you gotta--

No, I'm not. [Sniffles] you're not listening to me.

You gotta-- you gotta let her in.

[Jo] steve wants lisa so badly

To really raise her game, step up

And be the mother that he hopes shecan be.

I don't--i don't feel like you're--you're trying.[Sniffles]

I don't feel like--

I feel like you think this is a waste of time.

I'm here to support you. You need to step up here, lisa.

And he believes in her more

Than she believes in herself right now.

You know, all I can ask you to do at this point

Is just... Try your very, very best.

After my conversation with mom and dad,

I realize that this family need time to build relationships.

Josh is the only boy in a house full of girls,

So I sent him off with dad to do some male bonding.

Look at that. You got air on that one. That was good.

I now have to close the gap between halley and mom.

There--there's been a lot of resentment built up,

You know, over the years with halley,

And I think it's time, as we are starting everything fresh,

To really make amends with halley.

Talk to her, mother to daughter,

About how you want to be able to really have

A relationship with her,

And I think she needs to know that you love her

And that you care about her a lot.

And I'm gonna suggest that after you've had that conversation,

We go off and take halley and yourself bowling.

Okay. Just you and her, you know? Create some new history.

[Lisa] well, when I faced halley,

It was kind of hard...

'Cause we haven't really connected

And talked about things.

We're gonna go out, and it's just gonna be you and me,

And we're gonna get to go bowling.[Gasps]

It's just gonna be you and i.

[Jo] it was so important for her to go into halley's bedroom

And to talk to her daughter, but everything was prompted.

Lisa did nothing impulsively from her heart.

So it's really great that we've spoke about

How much fun we're gonna have together.

But we've missed the emotion.

Missed the emotion?

I think you need to talk about... Your relationship.

Um...

If there's any issues with anything,

I want you to know that you can always come to me.

Why?

Why can she come to you?

'Cause I'm her mom,

And she can depend on me and trust me to help her.

If you can't be open with your daughter,

We can't bridge the gap between you and halley.

So what are you gonna do to change,

So that you can have a better relationship with halley?

The yelling's been, um, more directed to you.

From now on, it's not gonna be screaming.

It's just gonna be talking to you and telling you

The things that you're doing wrong.

But make sure you always know that you can come to me.

I think you should give each other a big squeeze, huh?

[Chuckles]yeah, a big hug.

Lean over. What's this?

Hold your daughter and your mom, huh?

When jo had mom hug me,

It made me feel like I have my family back.

I don't remember the last time mom hugged me.

You ready? [Sniffles] mm-hmm.

Okay, I have to get socks and... [Sniffles] and shoes.

She's still very alienated from the family

And won't allow herself to get close to her children at all.

[Softly] you've cut yourself off from receiving your kids' love.

So every time you get close, it makes you emotional.

You both just have to help each other

And feel each other's love.

[Sniffles]it's a beautiful thing, okay?

I want you to do that for me, all right?

Lots of hugs and kisses, okay? Let's connect physically,

All right, and emotionally with our children.okay. [Sniffles]

See you later.

♪♪♪

Whoo!

Yeah!

You did good, yeah?

Okay...

Okay.

Ooh.

[Giggles]

Hey. Almost. Okay.

Come on, you can do it. I know it seems awkward right now.okay.

But you know what? You gotta be able to do it.

You know what I mean? You gotta connect with her.

When I approached lisa about being more tactile with halley,

She couldn't really bring herself to do that.

Two left. [Lisa] almost.

So she's still very detached

And removed from her children.

That's very worrying for me,

Because the children do need to receive a lot more

Than what lisa's willing to give right now.

High five? Good girl.

♪♪♪

Well, I'm gonna be leaving for a few days.

I wanna see change, all right?

Affection, the stuff that we spoke about,

Stepping up with the authority, okay?

Support, dad, okay?

Together let's make a difference.

Okay, take care.thank you.

See you when I get back.yeah.

Let's hug.

I am definitely going to be worried

About lisa's state of mind and where she's at.

[Girl] not coming with you?

No, jo jo's going now for a few days.

I'm gonna be watching you, though.

And I'll see you when I come back, okay?

So I'm just hoping that something's going to shift

Whilst I'm away, dramatically,

Because it's going to need to if there's going to be

Any real remarkable results here with this family.

Coming up on...

[Crying] [lisa] ali, come here.

With jo gone, mom loses control.

No!

[Shrieks]

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪♪♪

It's been four days

Since I've left lisa and steve alone with the kids,

And I'm very anxious to talk to them

About the issues that have come up since I've left.

So who's ready to take a look

At what's been going on whilst I've been away?

Ready. [Chuckles]

Well, dad's like, "ready!" Mom? Yeah, I'm ready.

Yeah? Okay. [Steve] go grab a towel and come back over here.

You're now in a time-out 'cause you decided to tease.

[Shrieking] dad! Daddy...

So are you and irelyn done with all the chores?

Daddy!

Dad, dad, dad!

Dad!

Dad!

[Steve] what time is it? [Lisa] I'm watching.

She's got till . She's .

I want an apology. I'm sorry!

[Crying] give me a hug. I want a hug.

I want a hug, though, or I'm not gonna let you out.

Both hands. [Chuckles]

Now that's what I'm talking about.

Give me five. Give me a slap here.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Very pleased to see you remembered

About the effective time-out in the same space.

That hits home for alexus... [Hits palm] yeah.

Because she's watching everybody else,

And she wants to be in the action. Mm-hmm.

And to ignore her was even better,

Because you didn't feed the fire.

Yeah, that bothered her. That bothered her.

Now we've got parents parenting. I feel happier inside.

I just feel respected. You guys have really stepped up.

So we're gonna move on to the next clip here.

It's about yourself, lisa, and discipline,

But the misuse of it.

So let's learn from the clip that we are about to watch.

Look up and get up.

[Crying] okay, give me a hug. Ali, come here.

I don't want to. Ali, come here.

I don't want to! Okay, I'm gonna give you five seconds...

I don't want to!

And if you're not back here in five seconds,

I'm going to give you another time-out.

One... [Crying]

Two...

Let's go, ali.no!

Irelyn, you've gotta start your time-out all over again.

[Giggling]

Stand up.

[Children giggling]

Okay. What have you objectively been able to see

That you could have done better here?probably talk directly to them.

Yeah. I noticed I wasn't looking right at them.

That's one thing. I can't pick ali up,

So walking her directly to time-out.yep.

What we saw is a nervous mom who didn't know if really

She would be able to discipline effectively.

And at that time, she tested you,

'Cause you started to talk to her.

If you start to slip in your own lack of faith

Of whether you can do it or not,

It then makes you feel frustrated.

And when you're frustrated, what we see is this kind of behavior,

And it becomes too extreme.

At times like that, we just step up

But take ownership as the parent, as the mother.

Don't fight for the position that you already have.

Instead, just claim it.

Let's go. It's time to eat.

[Girl laughs]

[Steve] take a bite of chicken first.

Blimey, who banned the talking?

What?

We've got the family to the table, so let's talk.

Let's socialize. I mean, yes, we eat,

But it's a great opportunity when we are all at the table

To be able to catch up on each other and see what we're doing

And stuff like that, all right?

Because mealtimes allow us as families

To be able to connect. It's the one time

Where we can just all come together.

[Lisa] did you guys take all my towels out back?

I want you to grab me the towels like I asked.

This table is dirty. Why did you make that noise?

Put your shoes on! Put your shoes back on.

Ali, your shoes are still sitting here.

Alexus, get over here. [Laughs]

Irelyn, no pulling hair. [Laughs]

I have to laugh, because I'm glad

I didn't spend all day withyou on that day.

I think the word "negativity" comes to mind.

Doesn't it to you, lisa?

The negativity is where you're at. It's your mind-set.

It's your mentality--very quick to criticize, and no praise.

I'm not hearing any praise at all.

And it's the intonation. It's how you deliver.

So it comes across as quite a drag, to say the least.

We definitely want to replace the nagging with nurturing.

Yeah. It will help in the way that they respond to you.

It will help majorly.

Get the scissors, halley.

You line it up with this, draw the line.

And you cut it, and I'm gonna make

A little thing like that, and you... Okay, go ahead and cut it.

Jennifer taught me this.

You just make a hole in the middle of the strip,

And it makes a little... Makes a little bow.

Very, very nice.

What I love here is that you're actually taking the time

To sit down with halley and just do the things

That she needs to do, and you were helping her,

And at the same time, that space was allowing you tobond. [Chuckles]

I'm very pleased to see that, lisa.

So with what I have seen, I would love to work

With the pair of you on tweaking things that need doing.

Are we ready to do some more?

I'm ready. Yeah.

Yeah, great. Okay. So let's get moving then. Okay.

Coming up on...

Jo gives mom and dad a taste of their own medicine.

It's gross.

[All] go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

[Jo] there is always more than one way of being able

To put a message across, and I was very concerned

About lisa and her language.

What we have here-- some lemons and some sugar.

Okay, so, mom, let's put lemon in our mouth.

There it goes. Feel-- feel what it tastes like.

It's gross. Her facial expressions said it all.

Yeah, this is really, like, bitter.

Kids, all take a piece of lemon.

Oh, just take it right here. Put it all in.

[Gasps]

The lemon is language. [Gasps]

That taste in her mouth

Is exactly what she leaves in her kids

Every time she chooses to use words that hurt them.

Now take a piece of the sugar.

[Girl] I could use a little sugar. Yeah?

What was the best, the lemon or the sugar?sugar.

And sugar is love.

And that's what these kids need.

We put lemon and sugar together.

[Gasps]

What does it make? Lemonade!

Exactly. And we all like lemonade, don't we?

[Girls] yep. [Lisa] at the end, i-i understood what she was saying.

I still have some hard spots, but I'm learning.

We're learning together.

[Jo laughs]

I really wanted to get the kids out with mom and dad,

So I created a game for them to realize

That they can have fun as a family.

We are going to do a relay that allows us

To connect with one another, and ultimately,

When each one of you achieves the task

That you're meant to achieve, you are all going to get

A very big treat from it, okay?

I could tell the kids were excited to do it.

I mean, that was definitely stepping outside the box for us.

Are we all ready? [Girl] yes.

Okay, let's go.

Yay! Yay!

The goal was to achieve what was in the icebox.

On to number .

Halley, your task is to dive into this water.

You've gotta find a key. Now! [Blows whistle]

[Steve] good, halley!

[Girl] halley's got the key!

You'd better go and put the key by the chest. [Steve] go open the chest.

[Girl] hurry. Hurry!

[Blows whistle]

This one is for mom.where's the key?

[Steve and halley] there it is!

Run to the chest! [Steve] run to the chest.

[Blows whistle] number ! [Steve] go, go, josh!

[Lisa] come on, josh!come on, josh!

[Steve] go, go, go![Blows whistle]

Come on, irelyn![Steve] yes! Go, go, go!

[Blows whistle] yes, she made it!

Dad, this is serious crunch time now, okay?

You have to find the key with only your mouth.

[Girls laughing and giggling]

[All] go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

[Josh] I think it was fun that we played together

And cheered each other on.

We never played together like that.

[Girls laughing and squealing] [girl] daddy!

[Josh] other way. Other way.[Jo] quickly! Come on. Put it on quick!

Quick, quick, quick![Steve] open it, open it!

[All cheering] [steve] hey!

Ice cream! Yay!

[Steve] my priority levels are starting to shift.

Going into this, I was worried about how many

Days of work I might miss. I haven't called my office once.

High five. High five.

High five.[Steve] I don't need to. It's under control.

What's that worth in comparison to becoming a better parent

And a better father and spending quality time with your kids?

[Steve] come on here. Come on.[Blowing whistle]

[Laughs]

I mean, that's what life's all about.

Whoo!

[Whistle blows]

[Laughter]

♪♪♪

[Jo] so jo jo's going home now.

Bye-bye, sweetie. Take care, okay?

[Jo] the journey begins now, really, for lisa and steve.

They recognize the importance of engaging their children

And really being present with them.

Steve? Good-bye. Thanks, jo.

Good-bye. You're more than welcome.

Take care. Keep going strong. Keep going strong.we will.

When we first started this, jo said something to us

In the beginning that, uh, we're parents,

Um, but we're not parenting. We need to be teachers,

And I hope I'm a better parent.

I feel like I'm a better parent.

Take care. Be strong.

I will.

I'm glad she stuck with me and put up with me,

Um, 'cause I know I was a pretty bad, um...

Putting up a pretty-- I should say big wall,

And, um, I'm glad she-- she was there.

Take care of yourselves.

Bye-bye.bye.

Bye! Bye-bye. I got to the bottom of mom's heart,

And now she needs to use it with her kids.

She needs to work at it,

And there's still a lot of work to be done.

[Lisa] we can go back up this way.

Oh, I want to go under that tree.

I think the family is, overall, better now.

[Speaks indistinctly]

We've got boundaries. We've got discipline.

We've got family time. We've got parenting.

Ooh! He just went underwater.

Watch. He'll pop back up. It was a really difficult struggle for lisa,

But she just really stepped up,

And she seems to be managing the kids much better.

Oh, boy, steve. [Lisa] I'm feeling a lot more confident.

They're listening to me now.

My kids know that there's a new mama sheriff in town. [Chuckles]

Whee![Laughs]

I'm proud of my family.

I feel like we've gone through a very difficult process,

But now looking back, it had to happen.

Now I feel like there's hope.[Giggles]

[Lisa] my family's future is a lot stronger, more together,

Happier. [Laughs]

No, don't spin me around! [Laughs]

I'm glad that jo came.yeah, I'm gonna miss jo.

What I'm going to do is to challenge you all

To be without technology.

So I'm going to hunt and look for remotes.

You found a remote? Oh!

Okay, off it goes. Thank you very much.

Oh, my word! It's like something really awful

Has happened in the family.

Jo's taken the remote controls away!