[Shrieking]no.
You're not gonna stand in a 'frigerator.
Jo meets the clauses...
No one's gonna pay attention to my [bleep] shoes![Gasps]
[Crying]a family on the brink of total collapse...
Ohh.why--why are you sitting--
[Child shouting indistinctly]
Oh, god!and a mother on the brink of a nervous breakdown.
[Voice breaking] I'm not strong enough.
[Screaming]the children lash out at their mom
And refuse to respect her...
Now you just made me miss a whole game!ow!
[Screams]and nothing mom and dad do gets the kids to do their homework.
I want you to look this over.
It's :, and you're not done with your homework.stop it.
They treat their mother like a pack animal... [Grunts]
And mom struggles to take a stand.
You carry it. Walk. Let's go!
Can jo help this family seize control? [Shrieks]
You want to sort this out,
You better take it seriously with me.and can she toughen mom up?
Do you wanna keep going?not really.
Well, you better do another one.or will this family implode?
Brandon, why don't you just act like a nice little boy?
Come downstairs--[brandon] nice little boy, my ass.
I'm not a nice little boy!
♪♪♪♪♪
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪♪ johnny ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪♪ johnny ♪
♪ Johnny ♪
♪♪♪♪♪
Here in studio city, another family awaits my help,
So let's take a look.
[Both] hi. We're the clause family.
I'm lorie, the mom... I'm ken, the father.
And we have children. Our daughter is caila, age ... [Crying] yes, you will.
[Lorie] I won't. And our son brandon, who is age .
No. No, mom. Come on. Oh, you wanna dance?
I'm a stay-at-home mom. Okay, are you guys coming to dinner or not?
Locked the door again. [Brandon] okay, mom. I'm coming to dinner.
How many times have I told you not to lock the frickin' door?
And I am a software engineer who works from home,
Which makes me very accessible to the family.
Although ken is physicallyhere...
[Crying]he's not really as available as I think he thinks he is.
Ken is so absorbed in his own work...
Ow!that I think he tunes out
All the conflicts with the kids.
[Shrieks]no. Stop it.
She's what?
No one's gonna pay attention to my [bleep] shoes! [Gasps]
As parents, I feel like we've lost the battle
For brandon and caila. This is not--
It's a place of joy. Get your feet out of the fridge. No.
You're years old. Act your age. Come on, you're ! Ow!
Why--why are you sitting-- ohh.
[Shrieks]i really don't know how to deal
With caila's sassy attitude.caila, I'm telling you--
I'm not gonna shut up.
Ohh, god!
This little girl, with that amount of sass?
Not in front of me.
Okay, you're not gonna stand in a 'frigerator.
I would say the biggest issue with--with brandon
Is anger management.
Brandon, why don't you just act like a nice little boy,
Come downstairs-- [brandon] nice little boy, my ass.
I'm not a nice little boy!
My take on homework in this family
Is homework is dreadful.
You need to at least spend an hour on the project.no.
Come on. I really want you to work on this
Without television. Okay. Okay.
Wait. Can I watch a little bit of it and then do my homework?
What time is this thing over at?
:.: At night.
Can I start it at :-- I mean,
All right. You got minutes.
I want you to look this over.
When did homework become negotiable?
I feel that I have given up so much of my own life
To make a better life for our two children.
I didn't have two parents for me when I grew up. Mom... Okay, mom.
Iwas the one who put myself through college.
Iwas the one who got good grades.
Are you crying?yeah, because it frustrates me, because I'm trying to help you.
Okay, I'll read. A few victims here.
I feel like I have to be the "ticking clock"
For everybody.you need to budget your time. Come on. Ticktock. Ticktock.
I totally feel like I'm being taken advantage of.
Ken and caila, dinner's ready. You guys, dinner!
Okay, are you guys coming to dinner or not?
Am I gonna eat by myself again? Okay.
[Voice breaks] I'm emotionally and physically drained
To the point where I feel like I'm just gonna break down.
[Thud]
This lady's carrying so much emotion.
[Both] supernanny, please help us.
We desperately need you.
Mom and dad, I've seen enough.
Trust me, I'm on my way.
♪♪♪♪♪
Hello.hi.
Hi. Pleased to meet you. I'm jo.
I-i'm lorie. I'm lorie. Nice to meet you.
Hi.[Lorie] when I met jo for the first time,
I was really nervous.this is my husband ken.
Hi, jo. How are you?hi. Pleased to meet you.
Hi, ken. Very well, thank you. Pleased to meet you.nice to meet you.
Oh, I liked her from the beginning.
Please, come into our home.so I'm here.
Yay.terrific. We've been waiting for this moment for a long time.
Yeah, so I see. You're very eager, very, very excited.
The serious side of me being here is that
There are issues that need to be really addressed,
So today what I am going to be doing is really taking
An in-depth look at your family from the outside.right.
All right? I-i'd love to take a look around the house.
As the kids were at school, I asked mom to give me
A tour around the house, but the tour around the house
Gave mom an opportunity to air her complaints.
This is our laundry area,
Where I spend alot of time doing laundry.
This is the--the kitchen. I do % of the cooking.
As a stay-home parent,
I do take on a lot of the domestic roles.
[Lorie] brandon and caila both share a bedroom.
Caila is in a phase of her life
Where when she takes out whatever she wants to play with,
She leaves it in this area,
Until finally I just give up, and i-i just clean it.
So many times, I feel like I'm pretty much all alone
Carrying the weight.if I was an octopus and I could have eight hands,
Everything would be great, but truthfully,
The house doesn't always look that tidy.
Well, mom's certainly got what I call
"The spit and polish syndrome."
She's very happy to polish her crown
And place it on her head and talk about
How nobody does anything, and it'sall down to her.
What I think we should do now, so that we're not late,
Is, uh, take a walk up to the school...okay. Right.
So that we can meet the kids and pick up the kids.okay. Okay, great.
I would love to jump in and be able to help lorie out,
But that her expectations seem to be all over the map,
And sometimes I just don't know how to help out.
[Jo] please?[Lorie] well, caila--yeah.
[Jo] as we walked to the school, mom was telling me
How the kids make her carry their bags
Andmake her feel like a mule.
And I kinda feel like--so who carries the backpack if she doesn't wanna carry it?
[Chuckles]sorry?
I always carry it.you carry it?
And now sometimes I'll carry brandon's
If it's too heavy, too.you know, I really don't mind helping them out
If they need it, if the backpacks are too heavy.
But I get frustrated
Where sometimes I have to carrytoo much.hi, caila.
Hi!hi. How you doing?
Hi, brandon, pleased to meet you.hi.
I'm jo. How you doing?good.
Good.[Jo] after we met the kids, we headed off home...
[Grunts] gosh, these things are heavy.
And sure enough, there was mom, lugging the bags.
[Grunts]why doesn't she just refuse to do it?
You've got both of them?both of them.
I mean, watching her with these rucksacks
And struggling with an umbrella--
I mean, she could have toppled over, quite frankly.
Coming up on...
I have never left a house at : at night
To still see children doing homework.
It was absolutely ridiculous.
Jo talks tough to mom and dad. And later...
This behavior is unacceptable.
Do you understand me?jo gives caila a piece of her mind
When "supernanny" returns.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪♪♪♪♪
Once we returned from the school,
The children's disrespect continued.
[Lorie] you're not eating candy now.
That's nice, but you're still not eating candy.
It's irrelevant, caila. You're not eating--
Caila! Listen to me. You are not eating sugar now, and that's it.
I know! I'm just trying to take the ribbon off. My god.
Will you just leave me alone?not right now.
So that's quite typical, is it?
To get the sassy mouth from caila?
All the--all the time.
[Jo] the way caila disrespects her mom is troubling enough.
But then both kids decided to ignore mom
When she wanted them to do their homework.
Hello. Can you do a little homework?
Just maybe a little bit? 'Cause, like--mm-hmm. At :.
At
Why? What--it's--it's :.What is happening between now and :--
And : that you can't do homework?
You always want rest.
You're finding an excuse.
No, I'm not.
After watching these kids treat their mom like a doormat
And negotiate at what time they were gonna do their homework,
I thought to myself,
At what point is dad going to step in?
But he didn't.
If you only have five problems,
We can just pound those out fast,
And you'll be off the hook.
[Jo] brandon's in fifth grade, and caila's in third grade,
And at :, these kids should be getting ready for bed,
Not doing their homework.
You're having a test tomorrow.yeah.
What is it that we're having the test on?all right, so hold on a minute.
There's a test going on tomorrow,
And this is the first time that you've seen any of the work,
Any of the...yes.
And it's...:.
: At night.yes.
I don't know how these kids get enough sleep,
Because they're doing their homework far too late.
And how can homework be a priority for these children
When the parents don't make it a priority themselves?
She wants you to read pages of science?
So wait a minute. She's expecting you to read...
Page through . That was tonight.
Pages?yeah. In addition to that,
In addition to a big project due on friday.
Is she behind in her homework anyway?
You're not?
There should be more progress during this week
Towards getting it done, so it's not gonna be--
So the teacher's not actually being unreasonable, right?
No, assuming that the child follows directions.
The problem is, is...why--why wouldn't a teacher assume
That a child would take direction?
Oh, well, our children don't follow directions.
That's the problem.i-i don't think it's--
So you allowed it to happen.i guess it's our fault again.
I think it's mad that these parents don't even know
What assignments their kids are doing or what time it's due in,
Considering homework is where they have problems.
So what time exactly will everybody go to bed tonight?
[Chuckles] we'll let you know tomorrow.
[Laughs]
I mean, basically, now it's stuff back in backpack,
Put our nightie on, brush teeth, bed.
Mm-hmm.so that's what,
[Lorie] :.
Are you kidding me? I made my way home.I told mom and dad, get a good night's sleep,
Because tomorrow morning we're gonna have a family meeting,
And it's gonna be some straight talking going on here.
Okay. What can we do to help you, caila,
So we can get it done?well, for now let's just put it back in, all right?
Okay, let's just go. I think everybody wants sleep.you gotta go to bed.
♪♪♪♪♪
Oh, yeah, I was ready to speak to mom and dad,
And I wasn't going to be holding back.
I have a feeling at the parent meeting,
I'm gonna have to hear some things
That I may not want to hear.
I am so nervous for this parent meeting,
Because I'm pretty confident that I'm gonna be criticized,
And I'm scared for the truth.
Let me start off with the first thing that I have noticed, okay?
And the first thing I want to talk about here
Is time management.
Where is your daily routine?
It just--right now it's-- it's entirely all over the map.
You just fly right by. You just get through another day.
But wait. Who's gonna write that out--the kids?
I mean, seriously, if you would just accept
The time that you have and recognize the times
That the kids are at school and what you have to do
Within that day and allocate sufficient amount of time,
You would not be sitting here feeling like a failure
Because you can't function as a normal parent every day.
It's not going to get done if you decide to sit down
And do nothing about it, the pair of you.
Yeah, you're right.
None of you have defined your responsibilities
And roles in the house.
Let's talk about responsibilities here.
Nobody has responsibilities. There are no chores here,
Because you have no expectations,
Because you're fearful that the kids are gonna kick off.
Right.
Which is madness, because now they're walking around
Like you're a pair of skivvies, the pair of you.
Oh, you'll do everything for them, and you've created that.
That's true.we have.
You're right.your children don't even carry their own bags from school.
Seriously, lorie, you looked like a donkey yesterday.
You were packing so much rucksacks and books
And everything on your back, you could hardly walk.
The weight of the rucksacks were tipping you over.
And you're not teaching your children
How to take care of their own belongings,
How to be responsible for the stuff that belongs to them,
Because you're willing just to be a doormat.
Let's talk about homework.
I have never left a house
At : at night
To still see children doing homework.
It was absolutely ridiculous.
You blamed the school
For a project that was set two weeks before.
But we've been asking her every day to work on it,
And she won't. She refuses.
So that--it's frustrating on our end, where we do feel
That weare on top of it,
And we, you know, know that this is something
That you need to work on not the day before,
And she's like, "I don't want to do it."
Are you kidding me? "I don't want to do my homework"? Tough!
At the table. We gotta do our homework.
You need to encourage these children
To have fun doing their homework.
And you're not gonna do that if you're knackered yourself
At : at night.
You're tired. You want to go to bed.mm-hmm.
The attitude starts to seep out from the pair of you.
You're not worried about it at all.
It's actually not a priority.
And I ask you to look at yourselves.
We gotta change some things.
Yep.
A lot.
And if you want my help, I ask you...
To work hard, too.
Because I expect that from the pair of you.
I expect it.
So are we ready to get started?
I'm ready.
[Whispers] I'm ready.you're ready?
All right, so let's get going then,
'Cause there's lots to do.
Coming up on...
Give it back now!either that, or we are not getting dressed!
Don't push me!what happens when jo walks into the middle of a fight?
[Shrieks]you want to sort this out,
You'd better take it seriously with me,
Because I've come in here % willing to help you.
When "supernanny" returns.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
But first, a tip from supernanny.
Does your family use reward charts?
If not, then start by getting your kids involved.
Have them create their own chart
Using their favorite supplies and colors.
They'll love the chance to be creative.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪♪♪♪♪
[Lorie] get dressed.[Caila] no!
Come on. Why-- don't pull my hair. Don't.no! [Shrieks]
I'll help you get dressed.no!
Don't push me.i need a towel!
Don't--did you just hit me in the face? Don't you hit me.[Shrieks]
Don't push me.
I... Need... A... Towel!
You come in your room.[Shrieks]
Oh, don't you bite me![Shrieks] I got you back now!
Either that or we are not getting dressed. Don't push me!no!
♪♪♪♪♪
[Caila] no! No! [Crying]
She needs to do what she needs to do first.
I know, but she's not getting dressed.
Every time we need to go somewhere...[Shrieking]
Every time we need to do something,
It's always this behavior.was I seeing right--
An -year-old throwing a fit like she's some -year-old?
This is ridiculous![Shrieking]
Completely ridiculous.[Lorie] do you want to go outside?
You want try that outside?[Jo] parents allowing their -year-old daughter
To hold control over them like a -year-old.
I was totally stunned.
It takes one minute to put clothes on,
Then you can have your toy back.
[Shrieking]
[Lorie] where do you want to get dressed?[Caila] here!
Fine, then get dressed in here.i can't!
Here's your clothes. Brandon and I are leaving.
[Jo] excuse me? What is going on here?
Um, somebody doesn't want to get dressed.
Somebody doesn't want to get dressed?
Mm-hmm.so what's been happening?
Temper tantrum.yeah?
Power struggle.
[Jo] yeah? Right. So where are we now?
Why is she in this room?'Cause she said she wants to get dressed in here.
So what is she doing to you right now?right now?
Yeah.stressing me out.
When I walked into the bedroom and asked mom what was going on,
She told me everything was fine now.
I'm like, are you kidding me? What is going on here?so what do you need to do now?
Make sure she gets dressed.so how are you gonna change that?
Get control.yeah. How are you gonna do that?
I don't know.well, I want to show you.
[Sternly] this behavior is unacceptable.
Do you understand me?
Do you understand what I'm saying?
I want you to go straight back into your bedroom.
I want you to put your clothes on,
And when you've done that, I want you to go and see mommy.
Do you understand me? Right. Right now.
Right now.
I don't think caila has ever been spoken to very firmly.
I think caila has been mollycoddled
With... [Singsong voice] sweet, sweet singsong voices...
[Normal voice] or she's been yelled at.
I was clear, and I showed her I meant business.
And she got herself up from the bedroom
And into her own and started to get herself dressed.
What did I do?you raised your voice.
Observe--observe what I did.you want me to say?
Mm-hmm.[Stern voice] "caila, get your clothes on right now
And go get dressed."Mm-hmm. So how do you sound?
If I'm more firm, then I'll be more authoritative.
So why didn't you use that?oh, I definitely back down when it comes to caila.
Some ways I'm strong, but in many ways, I'm very weak.
Do you know why your toy was taken away from you today?
[Sniffling]
Yes, you do know. You do know why your toy was taken away.
I know you know.
Was you listening and doing as you were told?no.
No. Exactly. Okay, let's get one thing clear here.
You're being asked to do something.
If your mom and dad tell you to get yourself dressed,
Then you must respect your parents and listen,
Because if you don't,
Then there's gonna be consequences for that.
What do you need to do?do it.
Exactly.
Was she happy? No.
Did she cry? Yes.
But did she do it? Yes.
[Caila crying]
Uh, uh, w-what are we doing here?
What are-- what are you doing?
I walked past caila's bedroom to see mom apologizing
For the discipline that caila had just received.
I mean, this mom has just undermined
Everything that we have just accomplished.
You went in there because of what?feeling guilty.
And why did you feel guilty?
Because I saw her sad.
Listen to what is coming out of your mouth.
You feel guilty because you've asked your -year-old
To do what I successfully get -year-olds to do.
So do you think she's gonna remain sad
For the rest of the day?
Do you think she's gonna grow up hating you?
Seriously, is that what you think?
You want to sort this out,
You'd better take it seriously with me,
Because I've come in here % willing to help you,
And I want you on board.
Aren't we here for your kids, to teach them...yes. Yes.
For you to feel empowered as a parent?yes.
Then allow me to do that.okay.
Lorie is absolutely petrified...okay.
That she is not going to have a good relationship
With her own daughter, and that is what's stopping her
From disciplining her own daughter.
[Lorie] it was truly an eye-opener
To see the observation of other people,
Of how they see me.
♪♪♪♪♪
You know, I realize that mom feels so much guilt
When she has to say no to her children...bye!
So I wanted to take her outside the house
So she could release some of this emotional baggage
So that she feels okay
And not guilty about saying no to her children.
We're about to take a walk. You've got a rucksack
Full of weight. You're gonna be carrying that.what mom didn't realize was
That the weight in the backpack is full of rocks
That have words associated to the past
That she needs to leave behind to be a better parent.
Let's go![Exhales deeply]
[Jo] we like it when it's miserable!
Just go slow! Slow is what it's all about.
Catch.
Jo is pushing me to go up the hill
And to go faster, and she threw a rock at me.
"Here. Carry this one. Here, carry this one."Do you want to keep going?
Not really.not really? Well, you'd better do another one.
That didn't sound like a "no."
And I'm looking at this woman, thinking,
You need to find the courage to sayno.
Because if she can stand up to me and say no...[Jo] no! No!
Then she's gonna have the strength
To be able to do that with her own kids.smile.
Okay, I'm smiling, but I don't feel very happy.
I'm feeling this heavy backpack on my back,
And I'm realizing this is my life every day,
And I have to make a choice.do you want to do it again?
No.
Do you want to know what's in your rucksack?yeah, I do.
Finally, she says no, and I'm like, thank god.
She got it.
Read 'em and lay 'em out.
"Lack of responsibility."
"Tone of voice."
"Doormat mentality."
As she starts to lay out what the rocks say,
It hits her, and she realizes
That she has been holding on to issues.
Holding on to all of this.
It's dragging you down, and it's dragging everybody else down.
You can pick up these rocks,
And you can continue to carry them.
Or you can chuck them down there and make a choice
To get rid of it forever
So that you can move forward.
[Voice breaking] I don't want to carry all this weight anymore.
I want to let it go.
I have to make a choice to get rid of this weight.
Blame.
Disorganization.
Too controlling.
Needs acceptance.
This is probably
The most eye-opening experience of my life,
Getting out all that anger and frustration and emotion.
I don't need to be a person carrying around
So much negative weight.
Maybe once in my life, I can finally be free.
[Exhales deeply]
Look at that. What do you see?
A rainbow.
A rainbow. That rainbow must have come out for you.
A new beginning.
It's a sign.
Seeing the rainbow was very symbolic for mom,
Because it showed her that the stormy clouds were clearing,
Just like the weight of her issues,
And seeing that rainbow allowed her to realize
That she would be able to receive
Sunshine and happiness into her life.
Thank you.
[Laughs]
[Lorie] jo took the time in the rain to care,
And no one has ever done that for me ever in my life,
So I will never forget this day as long as I live.
Isn't your backpack heavier?
Now my backpack's heavier than yours. [Laughs]
Coming up on...
...taken advantage of me for so many years.
Mom takes a stand.
[Crying]that isnot acceptable, and you know--
And a walk home from school turns ugly.
Aah! Aah!
When "supernanny" returns.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪♪♪♪♪
[Jo] sometimes I put rules into a household first,
But having worked with lorie
And given her the time that she needed,
I knew that I would return the next day
And then put the rules in.[Jo] so the next thing we need to do
Is to work on rules, on house rules.
[Lorie] when jo recommended we do house rules,
And we work together as a family,
I think brandon and caila were really surprised,
Because we had never done anything like that before.
So we're gonna do this on the computer, all right?okay.
So let's take a look at that.
The house rules are gonna be for all of you,
Because we've not been leading by good example.
Ultimately, it's going to be the parents
In establishing what those house rules are.
Does mom and dad swear?sometimes.
Sometimes we do.it would be good to set a good example here.
[Lorie] with the rules in place,
It's our job as the parents to follow through.
There's four people that live here.
It's house rules for all of us.
I anticipate a lot of kicking, a lot of screaming,
A lot of name-calling, and again,
If ken and I are not consistent, this is not going to work.
So this is good, because what we've got is
This set up now as desktop.[Ken] I think the challenge will be
Keeping ourselves to the new rules
And not going back to screaming and yelling
And the way things were before.
So what we've got here are privilege-removal strips.
What I have for you all
Is a list of the things that we like to do,
So take a look...[Jo] rules don't work unless you enforce them,
So that's why when these kids misbehave,
We're taking away their privileges.
[Jo] "movies, riding bikes, dance classes, handball..."
All sound familiar?
These are the things that you love to do,
And these are the things that you're allowed to do.
However, we've got house rules up now,
And if those house rules get broken,
Then what is going to happen
Is that the consequences for that
Are going to be you guys losing those privileges,
And one of these strips will be taken off
And placed into your personalized basket.
[Lorie] well, I think privilege removal
For both brandon and caila is going to be huge.
We have never followed through
With any type of discipline like that ever.
Quite simple, really.
Don't break the rules, keep your privileges.
♪♪♪♪♪
[Jo] with a system of discipline in place,
The next step is to pull dad away from his computer
That he works with at home,
So he can spend more quality time with brandon.
So I'm glad that the two of you
Are sitting down here having a chat,
Because it's important for us to continue
To encourage brandon to do the things
That he is interested in doing,
And it's also very important for you,
As the male role model in this house
To be an inspiring father figure,
So that he's able to look up to you
And know that you are there to support him in doing that,
So today what we are going to do
Is we're going to jump into my taxi
And take you to a gymnasium.
Yeah, hey.
So are we ready to go?i'm ready.
Yeah, all right.you ready?
[Brandon] yeah.let's go.
♪♪♪♪♪
Perfect. That was a .
Tie. Legs way up. Legs up.there you go.
Stand up. That was better.it's important that ken does activities with brandon,
Because it's gonna allow them to connect...beautiful.
Whoo!which, in hindsight, is going to develop their relationship,
So they get on better.
Good job.
[Ken] I could see it on his face that he was really glad
That he had been affirmed as a person again in--
With things he enjoys doing.
Feet up.
Whoa. Whoa.
You know, it was great to see ken doing something
That brandon absolutely loves doing.
I mean, what better for a boy's self-esteem
To really raise the bar and have his dad do something
That he loves doing himself?you wanna teach him, brandon? Teach him how to do it.
You gotta show me how I get up.
First, I'm on my back. Then what do you do?
When the coach had brandon step up and said,
"Hey, why don't you show dad how to do it?"
That was great. I just--i-i love doing things with brandon.
What do I do?
All right.
I go backwards?yeah.
Yeah?[Jo] brandon's face lit up,
And that's been very few and far between...uhh. [Laughs]
But he was enjoying his dad listening to him.good job.
Hey, dad, do it.give me five.
[Man] he likes to challenge you, huh?
Uhh. Was that it? Did I do it right?
[Laughs] you guess.you survived.
Yeah.[Jo] brandon really loves the gym,
And I feel that dad's learnt that he needs
That he needs to put himself away from that computer
Every now and then and encourage brandon to continue going.
Brandon, did you have fun doing this today, huh?
Yeah? How--how did it make you feel?good.
[Jo] yeah?would you like to come back here?
Yeah.good. I think we'll make that happen.
What do you say? Okay. Let's do it, then.
[Jo] it was time for me to leave for a few days.
Leaving mom and dad alone is going to be telling.
Keep your eye on the bigger picture here, okay?
Yeah.
Trust one another, work together,
Follow through, communicate, okay?
This is about empowering your own family,
Andthat is a priority.
[Lorie] now I do know that jo is gone for a few days,
And I'm scared that being jo is not there,
That the kids are gonna take advantage of the situation.
[Ken] with jo's departure for a couple days,
I'm anxious but excited. I am concerned that things
Might slip back into old bad habits.
That's, I think, a little natural
In starting a new process,
But I think both lorie and I are determined to make it happen.
[Speaks indistinctly]
Aah! Big hug.
All right? Strength, strength, strength, strength, strength.
Okay? Okay?relax. Relax. Just relax.
Strength, strength, strength. All right, ken.thank you, jo.
Take care. You're welcome.[Lorie] this process has been extremely draining.
I think brandon and caila are definitely gonna test me,
And it's gonna be a lot of work on all of our parts.
Enjoy, and I'll see you when I get back.[Lorie] okay.
Thank you, jo.bye-bye.
Bye.coming up on...
Now you just made me miss a whole game!ow!
The children treat mom like a punching bag. Stop it.
No!can mom recover?
[Crying] I'm not strong enough.or will she give up?
When "supernanny" returns.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
♪♪♪♪♪
[Jo] I've left the clause family with a lot of homework to do,
So I'm quite anxious to see if they've taken a step forward.
So let's take a look at this footage.
How are you feeling?
Nervous.
Nervous. Okay, well, let's take a look.
Carry it!it's not my job.
It's too heavy for me.it's too heavy for me, too.
No, it's not.yeah, well.
Carry it.caila, I don't want to carry it.
[Cries] you carry it. Now walk. Walk. Go!
Go!who is in control?
Go!who is in control?
[Coughs] go.no. I'm gonna be in control.
Aah! [Crying]
That is notacceptable, and you know--
Nowyou lost a privilege.
Okay, this is what I saw.[Sighs]
I saw a woman that made up her mind
That she will not be the cart horse donkey anymore
And she was not going to carry the bags.[Laughs]
Okay, and you did really well there, okay?
Then I saw a piece of lorie that went,
"Oh, I don't know. I don't know. Go back to how you normally are,
Because this is all a bit too scary."Yeah.
And she started to go, "you carry the bags,"
And she went like this to put your arm over...yeah.
To carry that.yeah.
And you said, "who's in control? Who's in control?"
You're really going, "oh, my god. Whois in control here?"Right. Okay.
"I'm feeling like I'm not in control.
I don't know what to do next."[Exhales deeply]
When that happens and you feel that,
I want you to say to yourself, "I'm in control.
I am in control." Not "who? " "I am." Okay?
You stopped, and when you stopped,
This is what happened.
Because you know what? You know what?
[Crying] just help me.
The house rules apply even outside the house.
[Crying] no.
[Lorie] you're ripping my co-- you know what? I've had it.
[Continues crying] this is not your coat, and I didn't ask you to rip it.
[Crying indistinctly] that's what she wants from you, okay?
When you sat down for a minute,
What she was saying verbally to you,
She realized weren't working,
So now she had to get physical with you.
Now we've stepped into the old behavior patterns.
As soon as she hit you once,
You should turn around with a low tone voice
And say to her, "you donot hit me.
"That is your warning. Any more of that behavior,
And you will be losing a privilege."
Get up and walk away.
Don't allow yourself to be the punch bag.okay.
Okay? Okay. Let's keep working.
Carry the bag!i told you, I'll help you carry the coat.
[Cries]
[Cries] you know, I've been very patient with you.
You've taken advantage of me for so many years.
Aah! [Cries] aah!
[Continues crying]
[Lorie] you did it. High five.
[Caila growls]
Ouch!
[High-pitched grunting]
Stop it. No!
You lost serious privileges.
Okay.
What's going to be vital is that you continue
To do what you're doing,
Because then you will set the pathway
Of stability and normalcy for her,
And she will recognize, "well, this is how it is."
This I'm very pleased with, though, lorie.
Really? I thought I was gonna get beaten up for that.
Very, very pleased.okay.
Very pleased.okay. Good.
Okay. Let's take a look at this next piece here.
No. You don't get to watch tv, so don't even get any ideas.
Maybewhen you didn't lose a privilege.
Now if you keep up the good work today,
Then I will take the tv out of the basket tomorrow.
I can't?
No, you can't. It's not fair!
I get to watch tv.
When do you think? Right now? Because it's free time?yes.
Let me talk to dad.oh, come on.
Okay. What did you do there?i-i-i--
We kind of undermined it by...that's the word.
What did--say it again.y-y-you undermined it.
I undermined myself?you gave him hope there was an opportunity
It might go his way, instead of just being firm and saying,
"No. The resolve is no television for today, period.
It doesn't matter who we talk to."Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Move.it's :, and you're not done with your homework.
Stop it. Stop it. You were up till midnight last night.
Now you just made me miss a whole game!ow!
Sorry! Now you just wasted some perfectly good time on it!
Leave me alone.
[Sighs]
[Crying] I'm not gonna be able to do this.
I'm not strong enough.
I'm not gonna be able to do it,
Because they won't respect me.
It's only good if everybody participates,
But they won't.
They're winning the battle.
[Sniffles] I have two kids that are winning...
So what's the point?
[Jo] so they may have won the battle,
But you certainly haven't lost the w*r.
I don't know why you were giving up at that moment.
In the beginning, you have to tow the line,
Just like jo was saying.
I mean, you gotta stick to what--what works.
Even if itfeels like things are coming unglued,
You have to stick to what works, and that's these things,
And not let them pull you
In this rubber band, ten-direction thing anymore.
So what we are going to do is to work really, really hard
In stepping up what needs to be done here
With regards to privileges, with regards to homework,
Making sure that we can keep positive
About "I am in control"
And making sure that we tweak anything
Throughout the time that I'm spending with you today
On the fly as it's happening, okay?mm-hmm.
And together, we'll keep doing it all.okay.
Okay? Great. All right. Let's get going.
Coming up on...
Everybody listen, because this is crucial.
Jo has one last chance to get the kids to do homework,
And mom and dad are terrified it might not work.
When "supernanny" returns.
♪ Be good, be good ♪
I saw progress watching this dvd,
And I really want to use that momentum
To push this family forward
In tackling the biggest issue they've got--
Homework.
The other thing that I want to show you all now
Is the homework base
That I've set up in the laundry room, okay?
'Cause we're gonna have a system
In which we--we file homework and get it organized.
[Ken] homework is a constant battle.
Never gets done on time, always up late,
Everybody's tired...
It has been the plague of our family.
This is the new system for the homework, all right?
Everybody listen, because this is crucial
In bringing about a system
That is going to make it completely easier
Than what it was before, all right?
When you come in from school,
Get out your homework, okay?
And place your books on your trays.
[Lorie] I think the homework station
Could be really exciting for brandon and caila.
I think it gives them ownership
And control and independence
To work in their space and feel proud
And feel organized.
You've each got a file here with your names on it.
Within that, there are daily folders here, okay?
So you will be able to see when the homework is due.
[Lorie] so if there's a paper that's due on tuesday,
But it's monday, then it's their responsibility
To file it on the tuesday category,
And it's our job--ken and i-- to write it on the chart
That weknow that there is a project
That is going to be due on tuesday
And to make surewe stay on top of it withthem.
It's a practical aid of just creating some organization
So that we're on top of it.
We have the visual reminder with the school timetable,
We have the files,
And then we have a place to put the books,
So everything is in order-- backpacks, books, files...
Visual.
It's good.[Ken] the homework filing station
Is really a great idea for the kids.
It gives them a place to organize their paperwork.
I think it's really a-a great benefit.
So look, listen, guys, this is what I thought we would do.
Let's get our homework done and then why don't we go outside
And have some fun...[Jo] I certainly didn't want
To leave this family until I was convinced
That they could get through homework
Without their kids causing a fuss.
So, mom, good energy, high-spirited, enthusiasm...
All right? So that we can get the homework done,
Look through it, get it done, back where it belongs,
And then we're gonna have some fun.
Giving kids motivation for doing homework iscrucial,
Especially if you have trouble.
So homework out,
Making sure that we have the sufficient tools,
And then enthusiasm with it.
Remember, he's gonna go off. Keep your focus.r-r-right.
So let's focus on that.pretty things. Remember the extra things.
Can I fix the pants to make them look better?yeah. They look great.
[Ken] all right.keep focus on the one--
One--one--one assignment at a time.yeah...
[Jo] to push kids through homework,
You gotta be calm, you gotta be patient
And offer lots of encouragement.good.
Yeah, good stuff.great. Good.
[Ken] you'll do one-on-one with jo? [Laughs]
[Jo] so once the kids had completed their homework,
We stepped outside and played some basketball.
Whoo!girls against boys.
Mom?girls against boys.
[Lorie] I know that the homework went very well today.
Jo has had a huge impact on our house.
And she's gonna slam-dunk! Slam-dunk quick! Go! Get it!
[Lorie] oh, almost![Laughing]
The process with jo of sitting through the homework,
Then having the reward of children being able to go out
And have their free time-- that was very valuable,
And I think it was great for the kids
To see the program really bearing the fruit.
[Jo] it's time for me to go home now.
Right now?yeah.
Aw.aw.
Homework went really well, and so I knew
It was time for me to leave the clause family.
Don't get me wrong.
This family still have a lot of work to do.
However, I do know that they've learned enough
To continue the progress that they've been making.
Cool. That's me. [Laughs] thank you, brandon.
I'm seeing real change in my family.
It's still gonna take work, but I see real life change.
[Whispers] thank you.
[Crying] you'll never know
How deeply you touched my heart, jo.
[Lorie] this is a life-changing experience,
And this is a new beginning.
And then, th-this is my life now.
I want a big group hug from all of you.ahh.
I think jo jo's really helped my mom.[Brandon] bye, jo. Thanks.
[Jo] bye-bye. You're welcome. Bye-bye.[Ken] take care.
[Whispers] okay.wow. That was amazing.
♪♪♪♪♪
[Man] here we go. Rolling.
[Woman] okay, guys, nice big smiles.
Give me a nice wave.gorgeous. There you go.
Hey, caila, give us a big smile.
Not a crazy smile-- a nice, big, pretty smile.
Lorie, step behind brandon, so he gets a little sun.
There you go. That's great.
Keep--keep waving. Keep waving at me.
Oh, the sun's in my eyes.keep smiling.
Brandon!brandon, let's do it one more time!
Brandon, we're--we're on you. It looks good.
Cheese!
Cheese!
Smile for the camera.
Is that it?yeah.
We've got it. Thanks, guys.good roll.