♪
(Honking)
Whoa!
Whoa!
Ah!
♪
Like, keep this to yourself
but I think I’m in love.
With who?
With myself as a puppet!
I am just, like, so cute!
Especially in this exact
reproduction of a DeFlammo
original.
Sandra, these puppets are
supposed to help us reveal and
examine our inner persons.
If the outer person doesn’t
look good, like, who cares about
the inner person?
Hey, guys!
Let’s see yours!
Nah, it’s not finished.
Sure is a weird class
assignment, huh?
Yeah, if this guy thinks our
puppets are going to start
taking on a life of their own
and acting out our inner
thoughts and fantasies he’s
nuts!
Queen Julie, can’t you see I’m
in love with you?
Marry me and we’ll have finger
puppets.
Look at the Sandra puppet’s
stupid outfit and ugly strings.
(Laughing)
Good one puppet, Boyd.
Like, grow a wooden brain,
wonko!
Then again, we could all be
headed for an episode of the
twilight zone.
ZEIGLERI must say, Doctor
Stevens, it’s a great honour to
have a famous puppet identity
therapist here at Alcatraz.
Of course.
I was once engaged to a
puppet.
She left me for a troll doll on
the end of a pencil.
What did he have that I didn’t
have?
Other than bright orange hair
out to here!
With my patented puppet
identity therapy I can help
individuals learn about their
inner feelings.
Doctor Stevens, I can call
you Doctor Stevens, right?
Of course.
Well, Doctor Stevens, I’m
having a devil of a time with
this highly complicated brain
teaser puzzle you gave me.
It is not a puzzle.
It is a piece of string.
Done, I think the eyes were
the hardest part to get right.
Hello?
Actually, getting the Servos
to work in sequence was the
hardest part for me.
I trust you’ve all completed
your puppets.
Actually, Sir, if they have
strings they’re not puppets,
they’re marionettes.
Shh.
I will inspect each puppet and
we will begin revealing your
true inner selves.
There’s Bobby’s true inner
self right here.
(Sobbing)
Goon had better hurry up and
get here with his puppet.
GOONI don’t have one.
I thought we were supposed to
make ourselves into a puppet.
Quick, get him down.
Oh.
(Grunting)
Mr. Eggert, your you please.
Where’s the rest of it?
What, you think the other eye
should’ve been bigger?
Mr. Eggert, your puppet isn’t
finished.
Sure it is.
You are missing a very
important part of the real you.
You’re missing your wheelchair.
As a matter of fact, and
luckily for my mother, I was
born without it.
Are you being flippant?
Eggert’s in trouble.
Eggert’s in trouble!
You said the puppet was
supposed to represent ourselves.
Well this is me.
It’s not you.
You are in a wheelchair.
But I’m not a wheelchair.
When I cook I’m not a frying
pan.
(Laughing)
Don’t get smart.
This is school, aren’t you
supposed to encourage that or
something.
Enough, go to the principal’s
office.
We don’t have a principal.
We only have a vice--
To the principal’s office,
now!
(Sighing)
BOYDEggert’s in trouble,
Eggert’s in trouble.
Eggert’s in trouble!
Pipe down, immaturo.
And where is your puppet?
Uh, Sir.
Shh, I’m talking to this
student.
But Doctor Stevens--
Quiet.
I asked where your puppet is.
(Flatulence sounding)
That’s it, detention!
Mr...Gunderson?
Done.
Finally, someone has done his
homework.
Hm, it looks just like you.
(Sniffing)
Ew, it even smells just like
you.
Mr. Jimmy?
Is there some reason you’ve
added yourself to the official
portraits of our past
principals?
You’re kidding.
That’s who they are?
I thought they were just guys
with beards and out of date
suits.
I’ve got a whole closet full
plus a few extra beards.
So, naturally I--
Hello.
Whoa, someone pull the fire
alarm or something?
Where you off to so fast?
I’ve been sent to the Vice
Principal’s office.
Oh man, that doesn’t happen
unless you’re in trouble.
Except on visit the Vice
Principal Win a Chocolate Log
Day.
You all visited me.
Here are your chocolate logs.
No, I see by your expression
it’s trouble.
That’s where I come in.
Here’s my advice.
(Throat clearing)
Ask to see Doctor Stevens’
puppet.
Look, Mr. Jimmy, I don’t need
another one of your word puzzles
right now.
What do I have to do this time,
translate it into pig Latin and
say it backwards?
Type it onto a page and look at
it through a kaleidoscope?
(Throat clearing)
You might have a better time
talking to this picture.
I have wonderful conversations
with it every day.
Doctor Stevens sent me to see
you.
Ooh, Doctor Stevens.
This must be serious.
He’s a famous therapist.
You’ve obviously put a lot of
work into this puppet.
The eyes especially.
Thanks.
I used an to ratio.
But Doctor Stevens is, ooh,
an expert.
That’s why we hired him.
That and because otherwise we’d
have to spend the money on
textbooks with the right answers
and updated computer equipment.
The puppet needs to look like
you.
It does look like me.
But you’re legs don’t work.
These legs don’t work either,
you have to pull the strings.
My experiment needs
percent participation.
He’s suspended until he puts his
puppet in a wheelchair.
You can’t suspend me, you’re
just a therapist.
But he is an expert.
Ooh.
You’re suspended!
It’s freaky carrying a
miniature me around all day.
Hard to believe some kids are
actually talking to theirs, eh
Mr. Foot Goon?
That’s right Mr. Body Goon.
Like, wait up, I had to
change.
(Laughing)
(Grunting)
(Laughing)
You want a piece of me,
Scullarzo?
Hi-ya!
Where’s your puppet?
Doctor Stevens gave it
detention.
Still won’t talk, eh?
Hm.
GOONHey, how come you
didn’t come back to class?
I was suspended until I agree
to put my puppet in a
wheelchair.
What?
That’s crazy!
You’ve got to tell your dad.
Uh-uh, no way.
He has a long history of
overreacting when he thinks
anyone is being unfair to his
children.
Small neck gym uniforms
unfair to the generously nosed.
Field trips discriminate against
the chronically car sick.
Quiet time is an infringement of
toddler free speech.
It was amusing when I was
six.
In junior high it’s not really
something I want to deal with.
I’m an adult now, I can handle
this myself.
Hey, everyone.
How was your day?
My day was great, no problems at
all.
(Throat clearing)
So, uh, what’s up?
I’m planning your higher
education.
I got applications for top
universities and grouped them
according to their strengths.
Pile number one, steeped in
tradition, academically
rigorous, leadership oriented.
Pile two, steeped in a little
tradition, academically
flexible, professionally
oriented.
And in case any of you don’t get
top grades, which is perfectly
fine, well, there’s these.
Well, I’ll leave you to it.
You’re suspended until you
put your puppet in a wheelchair!
(Sighing)
KATENot so fast.
No monkey college for you.
You’re strictly ivy league.
Why do you care what
university I go to?
Because you being a street
sweeper ain’t going to put
doughnuts in dad’s milk at
Golden Angels Rest Home.
And if you think I want an old
man living in the guest villa of
my mansion asking what time
Jeopardy comes on, you’ve got
another thing coming.
Ask to see Doctor Stevens
puppet.
It’s time to play decode the
guardian angel’s message!
What advice to we have for
Pelswick Eggert today?
"Teppup Snevets Rdees Otksa."
Well, he’s given me worse
advice.
Let’s see here.
"Ski roppup eventsted tusk."
"Scramble odd worms nails
sausage."
QUENTINSo, what’s on your
plate at school today, champ?
Draw vintage skied ruffles.
What?
I mean, uh, the usual.
Remember what I said.
Hit the books, oldest son.
Bye!
Make us proud.
See you.
Looks like it’s just you and me.
Remember party frogs.
You made them yourself out of a
piece of gingham.
Yeah, remember making your
own butter?
Oh, you bet.
Tasted better than this store
bought stuff.
(Chewing)
GRAM GRAMYou remember
making your own sponges?
What?
Sponges from the sea!
You grew your own sponges?
Don’t you remember?
Oh, you got a , gallon
t*nk, filled it with brine
putting coral, rock, sand, kelp.
An eco system complete with
sharks, eels, micro plankton,
otters, rain fall and electric
tide simulators.
Then after - years, oh
you’re pulling out a sponge the
size of your fist.
What are you talking about?
We bought ours at the store for
a nickel.
Well sure butter’s cheap too
if you don’t care what it tastes
like.
(Chewing)
Huh?
What?
Oh, I thought I saw Pelswick.
Aw, that’s impossible he’s in
school.
We can’t go home.
We can’t go to school.
We don’t have $,, so we
can’t go to the moon.
Where do other people go when
they’ve got absolutely nothing
else going on in their lives?
Just a lemonade please.
Venti, grande, or
multo-grande?
Since when do beverages only
come in Italian?
Back to my patented puppet
identity therapy.
As you continue to speak through
your puppets, all the angst you
normally hide will bubble to the
surface.
Bubble, bubble, bubble, ooh,
I just love bubble baths!
Ooh, bubble, bubble, bubble.
Kicking out Pelswick was so
unacceptable.
So unjustified.
So, uh, so mean.
We have to do something.
We could, like, hold a puppet
hunger strike.
Actually, puppets don’t eat.
Speak for your wooden self.
Mine has this, like, matching
picnic basket and country
ensemble.
(Slurping)
Maybe I don’t have to go back
to school.
Maybe I could complete my
education online.
Stop it!
(Laughing)
After all every piece of
wisdom in the history of the
world is available on the
internet whether it’s true or
not.
"Welcome to the girls who
twirl their hair with one finger
while they type chat room."
Search for UFO’s in my
kitchen.
GRAM GRAMHey, give me a
double double just like Grandpa
used to make it.
No sugar, no fancy foam, and no
cream.
I brought my own.
(Mooing)
We’re, like, here to protest
the Pelswick puppet being thrown
out of school.
And Pelswick himself.
Right!
Tiny puppets!
(Gasping)
Are we inside the stomach of a
whale.
Shall I start a fire to make him
sneeze us out?
They’re protesting the
expulsion of the boy who upset
my experiment.
He became a real boy?
Oh, joy!
He’s been dreaming of it for so
long!
Ooh, he’s a real boy, a real
boy.
Where’s that little singing
cockroach?
I want to shake all six of his
spiky hands.
Actually, this may not be the
quickest route to a resolution
of the problem.
There’s plenty to do if
you’re not in school all day.
Does it get more interesting
later on, or is this pretty much
it?
(Belching)
That’s what I thought.
P-u.
What this park needs is big do
not litter sign right about
here.
Those albino pigeons are
enormous.
Those are seagulls.
This is the dump.
Oh that explains the network
executives looking for reality
show concepts.
Let’s put six people on an
island and make them fight over
this used corn cob.
Why aren’t you in school?
Didn’t you take my advice?
I tried decoding it.
The best I could come up with
was Dreef’s Nocturgents Grass
Nuppet.
No, sorry, Nuppets grass.
You’re close, keep working on
it.
(Beeping)
I knew I shouldn’t have worn
white today.
QUENTINHey, how was school,
champ?
Great, I was there.
I was there all day.
There were blackboards, and a
floor, and teachers, and desks.
That was school all right, and
that’s where I was.
(Sniffing)
Ugh, why do you smell like?
(Sniffing)
Poo poo.
Uh, field trip for school.
’Cause that’s where I was.
Field trip to where?
Uh, the museum of decaying
rotting stuff.
Ooh, notice anything, um,
different about the house today?
(Laughing)
I thought we needed a little
change from all that store
bought electricity full of
chemicals.
So, I built an old fashioned
homemade nuclear reactor on the
roof.
What is the meaning of this?
Actually, this is a puppet
sit in to protest the suspension
of Pelswick Eggert.
All puppets, sit!
SANDRABoyd!
(Grunting)
(Whistling)
Crew, maintenance, or just
stowing away for idle teenage
kicks?
None of the above.
Aimlessly k*lling time while
staying out of school and
avoiding family.
Right.
Warf .
Do you realize how much
trouble I got into just because
I stood up for you?
Or wait, did you stand up for
me?
It doesn’t matter.
I miss my friends.
(Thunder crashing)
I’m cold, I’m wet, and I’m
talking to a piece of wood here.
I should take some of this scrap
wood, build the stupid
wheelchair, and get it over
with.
(Thunder crashing)
ALLPelswick, Pelswick, we
want Pelswick!
Pancakes, pancakes, yum yum,
pancakes!
ALLPelswick, Pelswick, we
want Pelswick.
I simply cannot make a whale
sneeze with all this noise.
Puppet police, advance!
I knew you weren’t going to
school.
What’s your excuse, huh?
Huh, huh?
I got suspended.
(Gasping)
No!
(Panting)
Okay, plan B.
(Panting)
We need a non conventional
business plan capitalizing on
your rebellious bad boy image.
Would you endorse a line of
ripped t-shirts with anti social
slogans?
PELSWICKForget that, I
cave.
I’m making a toy wheelchair and
putting my self image puppet in
it and going back to school.
Self image puppet?
Not Doctor Stevens?
Did he come to your school
too?
He’s a complete loon-bo.
(Laughing)
Said I was career obsessed.
Have you seen his puppet or is
he still hiding it?
No, for some reason I didn’t
think of anything that straight
forward.
Thanks, Kate.
You want to thank me?
Get straight A’s!
(Thunder crashing)
You were suspended.
I’m not speaking to you.
And I don’t want to speak to
you.
But my puppet does want to speak
to your puppet.
(Thunder crashing)
My p-p-p-puppet?
Hello, children!
That’s Doctor Stevens’ self
image?
He thinks he’s an ostrich?
Emu, I’m an emu darn it!
If I didn’t have to shave every
day for a close minded society
that won’t let birds be doctors
I’d have beautiful beautiful
feathers.
I wanted an expert, not an
emu!
You’re fired!
Woo, woo, woo.
Woo, woo, woo.
(Cheering)
Look at him run!
(Laughing)
Why didn’t you tell me it
wasn’t a clue?
You don’t like clues, you
always say tell me straight out.
I know.
So I did.
But you didn’t tell me you
did.
Apparently we’re okay if we
stay in the front yard for the
next , years.
♪
02x08 - Pelswick On A String
Watch/Buy Amazon
Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.
Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.