02x14 - Beauty Marked

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Danny Phantom". Aired: April 3, 2004 – August 24, 2007.*
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Series follows Danny Fenton, a teenage boy who, after an accident with an unpredictable portal between the human world and the "Ghost Zone", becomes a human-ghost hybrid and takes on the task of saving his town (and the world) from subsequent ghost att*cks using an evolving variety of supernatural powers.
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02x14 - Beauty Marked

Post by bunniefuu »

Girls, do you dream of being a princess?

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

No.

Of wearing beautiful gowns and jewelry?

No.

Of charming and beguiling that special prince.

And gag.

I'm dora mattingly,

And I want to make sure that dream comes true

For one of you sweet young ladies.

[Cheering]

That's why I'm bringing my

Miss teenage happy princess beauty pageant

Right here to your school.

I hate this more than I hate the morning sun.

What's wrong with beauty pageants?

Other than the fact that they turn girls

Into shallow doormats

And boys into drooling idiots,

Everything.

But it's got a swimsuit competition.

I need a worthy and chivalrous knight

To select our princess!

Oh, me! I want to do it.

Pick me!

Oh, man!

Danny would love this.

Where is he anyway?

[Roaring]

Hey! If you needed something,

You should just a*.

Get it? a*?

[Grunts]

Yikes!

Our princess must appeal to the masses,

So she shall be chosen by a common boy--

Someone average and bland.

Too popular.

Too athletic.

Too nerdy.

Too-- handsome?

Smart? Intelligent?

Annoying.

Normal, dull--

[Screams]

You!

You're perfect!

Perfect indeed.

A perfect pawn!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

♪ He's a phantom

♪ Danny phantom, danny phantom ♪

♪ Yo, danny phantom, he was just ♪

♪ When his parents built a very strange machine ♪

♪ It was designed to view a world unseen ♪

♪ He's gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

♪ When it didn't quite work, his folks, they just quit ♪

♪ Then danny took a look inside of it ♪

♪ There was a great big flash, everything just changed ♪

♪ His molecules got all rearranged ♪

[Screaming]

♪ When he first woke up, he realized ♪

♪ He had snow white hair and glowing green eyes ♪

♪ He could walk through walls, disappear, and fly ♪

♪ He was much more unique than the other guys ♪

♪ It was then that he knew what he had to do ♪

♪ He had to stop all the ghosts that were coming through ♪

♪ He's here to fight for me and you ♪

♪ He's gonna catch 'em all because he's danny phantom ♪

♪ Gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

♪ Gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

♪ He's a phantom

♪ He's a phantom

♪ Danny phantom

[Bell rings]

Hi, danny. Hi, danny.

I baked some cookies for you.

I did your math homework.

Now, ladies,

You can't influence the judge

With cookies and--whoa!

Is this homework done

All the way through next semester?

Mm-hmm.this pleases me.

Hey, fentoid!

It's only been two hours,

And I'm already tired

Of you hogging all the hotties.

[Snaps]

Ow!

Aagh!

Get him!

[Yelling]

It's like a dream!

Every girl totally wants to date us.

Us?

Hey, as judge's best pal,

I'm entitled to a little spillover.

Want to go out, uh, ashley?

Yeah, right!

Judge's best friend.

Pick you up at :?

:.

That means I should be free

Around : for...

Sam?! Sam?!

Yes, sam.

I signed up for the stupid pageant.

[Gasps]

[Gasps]

[Laughter]

What is this, april fool's day?

Yeah, you hate this contest.

I'm not doing this to win,

I'm doing it to make a statement.

Well, here's a statement.

It says "I'll never win in this outfit."

Still, ms. Manson has a point.

You girls are unique individuals

With strong opinions and independent minds.

You're darn right we are.

It's my job to make you forget that

And mold you into happy little princesses.

All: yay!

Oof! [Screams]

Dating her friday.

Dating her saturday.

Dating her sunday.dating her sunday.

Once, twice, sh**t!once, twice, sh**t!

Ha!

Dating her sunday.

[Roars]

If we live that long.

Could we do this

When I'm a little less popular?

[Gasps]

[Grunts]

Aagh! Aagh!

Ow!

[Growls]

Sam: I'm telling you

There was something weird about dora.

Mm-hmm.

Ghostly weird.

Yeah. Yeah.

Oh! Aah, that's it.

So glad we could have this little talk.

Sam, look,

Whatever it is,

I can handle it when

This little window of popularity

Is over.

But right now, I have important...

Judge...duties to attend to.

I got those compliments you wanted to hear.

And I brought the tape recorder

So we'll have proof you said them.

[Screaming]

Ha!

Oh, crud.

[Grunts]

[Screaming]

I'm still totally into you,

But I can't let danny fenton know, ok?

He's the judge.

Aagh!

[Grunts]

Dude, you're seriously cutting into

My limited girls-are-flirting- with-me time!

[Grunts]

Ha!

Not so tough without your arrows.

Ow!

[Grunting]

I don't know why those spooks

Are going medieval on me,

But I'm gonna find out!

Hi, danny. Hi, danny.

As soon as this pageant is over.

You see?

The boy is distracted.

The ring masks me from his ghost sense!

He suspects nothing.

Which is more than I can say for the girl!

Perhaps next time you should just

Walk up to her and scream,

"I'm a ghost!"

Please!

Please forgive me, brother!

I didn't think--

You're not supposed to think.

You're supposed to keep it away from the ghost boy

Until showtime!

So, do it!

Wait, let's just savor

Our last few moments of date-ability.

[Sighs]

I'm gonna miss this.

Danny, don't go out there.

Dora is--

An insult to modern women?

A throwback to the dark ages?

Huh?!

And speaking of dark ages...

Danny, wait!

Ms. Mattingly?

I didn't hear you.

You'd be surprised how dainty

Your footsteps can be

When you don't wear combat boots!

Oh. Come.

We mustn't miss the pageant.

You know, I was really hoping

We could bury the hatchet.

[Growls]

Missed!

Or perhaps not.

Later, dude.

It's been a slice--

Aagh!

Ok, well, it's official.

I'm all out of a* puns.

♪ A happy princess

♪ Is sweet and pure

♪ With hair of gold

♪ And teeth of white

♪ Her soft complexion

♪ Is pure perfection

♪ With nary a pimple in sight ♪

Except her.

Aagh!

Ms. Mattingly,

I just realized

I'm not cut out to be a princess.

So, I'll just be going--

Nowhere!

[Roars]

Danny: wait!

Don't I get a trial?

A phone call? A last request?

Come on, cut me some slack.

Hey! Another a* pun.

[Clock chimes]

[Gasps]

[Grunting]

Oh, man.

I'm late for the pageant.

For my happy princess talent,

I'm going to lead a cheer--

About me!

Oh, yeah, helena!

That's me!

I seen ya.

I'm cute as a button.

And you, you're nothing.

Uh-huh! All right!

Break it down.

[Operatic singing]

I'm sam manson,

And my happy princess talent is...

Goth haiku.

Despair without end--

Dora's a ghost.

Utter blackness, nothingness.

Dora's a ghost.

Dora is a ghost!

So that's your big statement?

"Dora is a ghost"?

I mean, what--wait.

Dora is a ghost?

Good sir judge,

Has thou made thy decision?

Sam!

Yea, verily.

Let it be proclaimed

That the happy princess crown

Shall be decreed to...

Sam?!

Are you unwell?!

[Gasps]

[Cheering]

Sam, no!

My loyal subjects,

At long last, the wait is over.

Your prince has finally selected his bride!

[Cheering]

Bride?!

Dora: oh, cheer up, dear.

You're going to be a princess!

Cheer up?!

I'm hauled off to the ghost zone,

I'm about to be married off to a stranger--

[Growls]

Aagh!

Oof!

Oh, and let's not forget

This lovely feature to my crown--

It won't come off!

Ah ha ha!

It's no use, child.

Only prince aragon can remove the tiara.

You are bound to him forever.

Ah ha! Isn't that wonderful!

Well, prince aragon needs to get his head

Out of the middle ages.

It's the st century.

Not here.

In this realm, all time stands still.

Not that you'd care,

But this is no fun for me either.

I have to make you a princess

Or the prince will have my head.

[Giggling]

[Sighs]

We're doomed.

You're doomed, fenton!

You hear?!

You can't hide in there forever!

[All yelling]

Step aside, ladies.

Listen up, fen-toast,

Your get out of wail free card

Just expired!

Hey, where'd he go?

Oh, this is pointless.

You don't even know if sam

Is in the ghost zone.

Computer: real-world item detected.

Tucker: and now we do.

[Gasps]

Good old reliable technology.

[Screaming]

[Beeping]

[Screaming]

Oof!

Sam: ow!

Why does the prince want to marry a human anyway?

My brother wants to possess

That which no one else has--

A human bride.

That's why he forced me

To make your friend the judge.

Surely, a half-ghost would select

A perfect human bride.

You gotta be kidding.

That makes about as much sense as...

Glass slippers?

I know.

But the prince always gets what he wants.

Oh, really?

Then I'll just have to be

What he doesn't want.

What happened?

The ship just stopped working.

My pda, too!

What is this place,

Some kind of tech-free zone?

Oh, man.

We've got bigger problems.

♪ ♪♪

Enough merry-making!

Bring forth my bride!

Now!

[Awooga horn]

Sam: are you ready to party?!

Wassup?!

Here comes the bride!

Please! I'm begging you!

Don't-- food!

Cool!

I'm starving!

Meat! Meat! Meat!

Ah!

What are you looking at?!

Aagh!

Dorathea?!

What is the meaning of this?

Uh, pre-wedding jitters?

[Burps]

[Cawing]

Coast is clear.

Let's move.

Oh, man.

Not these guys again.

[Grunts]

Uh, tucker, a little help.

No problem.

I'll just hack into the security system,

Cut off the power,

And...

Stupid tech-free zone.

I knew technology wouldn't let me down!

Hyah!

Huh?!

Is there anything you can't do?

[Gulping]

[Clamoring]

[Cheering]

Can you not do anything right, sister?

Control her! But--

I've always wanted to do this.

Aagh!

I always wanted to do that, too.

Oh, you are so useless.

Guards!

Yahoo!

Mosh pit!

[Cheering]

To the dungeon with her!

But, sweetheart,

What about our wedding?

This tiara bonds us forever--

Remember?

You are not fit to wear it.

That's what I was hoping you'd say.

Hey! Let me go!

Sam, we're here to rescue you!

I don't need rescuing.

I was doing fine without you!

Oof!

Sam!

Insolent peasants!

No one steals price aragon's bride!

But I thought you didn't want her?!

You do not think ever!

[Shrieks]

You do as you're told.

[Snarling]

Wedding's cancelled, scaly.

Hmm?

Looks like I can get past

All kinds of firewalls.

[Roars]

Except that one.

[Grunts]

[Roars]

You just gonna let your brother

Push you around like that?

What choice do I have?

A princess isn't supposed to think.

We just have to smile, look pretty,

And live happily ever after.

So, how happy are you?

Aagh!

Ha!

You're just as smart as your brother,

And just as powerful.

True.

We do share the same power.

Which means...

I should be able to do this.

[Straining]

[Roaring]

[Roaring]

So...

You gonna let my friend go,

Or do we have to do this the hard way?

Aagh!

How about the slow and painful way?

[Roars]

[Gasps]

Dora, you imbecile!

What do you think you're doing?!

What I should have done ages ago!

, Of doing your bidding!

, Years of suffering your insults!

, Years of--

[Snarls]

You!

This is your fault!

You've been filling her head

With your modern ideas.

You might want to listen to some of those ideas.

I know I should have.

Apology accepted.

[Grunting]

I think it's time we took this realm

Out of the dark ages.

[Screams]

What is that?!

Time moving forward.

And you have a lot of catching up to do.

You must be the ladies in waiting.

Well, wait no further,

'Cause friar tuck--

[Grunts]

Call me!

You can now! Your phones will work!

Let's scratch his eyes out

With our perfectly manicured nails!

Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!

No, you don't understand!

I never actually picked the winner!

You didn't?!

I knew you'd come to your senses.

I have--

About a lot of things.

And for helping me to do that,

I decree our miss teenage happy princess shall be...

Sam manson.

[Gasps]

[Cheering]

I don't know what to say.

Oh, wait. Yes, I do.

These things are stupid.

[Gasps]

Up for a double veggie-veggie

At the nasty burger?

Sure.

But you're buying.

I mean, this is the st century.

Fear not, ladies.

I'm still accepting date-bribes

For miss congeniality.

I'm clawing his eyes out saturday.

I'm clawing his eyes out sunday.

Who gets him today?

, , ... !, , ...!

Ha! You're dead, foley!

Aagh!
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