01x01 - The Offer

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "House of Ninjas". Aired: February 15, 2024.*
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It follows a family of ninjas, known as shinobi, as they struggle to connect as a family and return to the shinobi lifestyle.
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01x01 - The Offer

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ I'll light the fire ♪

♪ You place the flowers in the vase ♪

♪ That you bought today ♪

♪ Staring at the fire ♪

♪ For hours and hours ♪

♪ While I listen to you ♪

♪ Play your love songs ♪

♪ All night long ♪

♪ For me ♪

♪ Only for me... ♪

[reporter] Mukai-san, a candidate
for the new governor of Tokyo


who had been abducted,

has been found just one hour
after the ransom demand was made.


Currently, there is no information
as to why Mukai-san was abducted


or how she was brought to safety.

- ♪ Such a cozy room ♪
- ♪ Such a cozy... ♪


[woman screams] Gaku!

♪ By the evening sunshine through them ♪

♪ Fiery gems for you ♪

♪ Only for you ♪

♪ Our house ♪

{\an8}♪ Is a very, very, very fine house ♪

{\an8}♪ With two cats in the yard ♪

{\an8}♪ Life used to be so hard ♪

{\an8}♪ Now everything is easy ♪

{\an8}♪ 'Cause of you ♪

{\an8}♪ And our ♪

{\an8}♪ I'll light the fire ♪

♪ While you place the flowers
In the vase ♪


♪ That you bought today ♪

[music ends]

[pop music playing on radio]

[chuckles]

Wow, you are really easy to read.

What?

You always have that smile on your face
when it's time for gyudon.

- [scoffs] What are you talking about?
- [laughs] Oh, come on, man.

It's like you have a tattoo of gyudon
on the side of your face.

[chuckles] I mean, uh,

it's definitely not the gyudon.

It's the gyudon girl. My bad.

- [man 1] All right, all right.
- [man 2] You sly dog!

[man 2 laughs]

[cans clattering]

[man 2] Why haven't you talked to her yet?

If I were you, I already would have.

Just ask her out. It's easy.

- [man 1] No, it's really not.
- [man 2] Yeah, it is.

You just say, "Would you like
to go out to eat with me this weekend?"

[chuckles] Oh, wait.

That's all you ever do with her,
am I right? [laughs]

[man 1] That's not the problem.

[man 2] So then, what is the problem?

Stop holding yourself back.
Just talk to her.

You're never gonna get anywhere
if you keep making excuses for yourself.

You know, I've got a good feeling
the two of you would make a good couple.

You're done?

Let's go to the last stop.

[man 2] Sure.

[mysterious music playing]

[footsteps approaching]

It's already been three days.

[sighs]

- Do you think they'll show?
- [officer 2] I wonder.

[officer 1] Why steal and then return it?

[officers gasp]

[officer 3] What happened with the lights?
What happened?

[officer 4] Hey! Up there!

- Look over there, look!
- [officer 3] What?

[grunts, gasps]

[music fades]

[muffled pop music playing on stereo]

Hey, nice work today.

[man 1] Huh? Aren't you coming?

Oh, I can't make it.
I've got plans tonight.

[chuckles] Good luck, lover boy. [laughs]

[employee] Welcome!

MEAL TICKET

BEEF BOWL, EXTRA ONIONS, RAW EGG

Extra broth, onion, raw egg.

Extra broth, extra green onion,
and raw egg.

[woman chuckles]

I'm sorry for laughing.

It's, um, extra broth,
extra onion, and a raw egg.

- Your order's always the same.
- [both chuckle]

Large, tons of garlic, kimchi on top.

[woman laughs] Right. [chuckles]

Mine's always the same too. [laughs]

[employee] Here you go.

You're probably working really hard.

Yeah, but I start late.

Hmm. What kind of work is it that you do?

I fill up
all the vending machines around here.

- [woman] Oh, I see. [chuckles]
- Yeah.

Do you mind if I ask what your name is?

My... [chuckles]

[laughs] It's okay.

It's all right, um... yeah.

Tawara Haru.

[chuckles]

Tawara-san.

Ito Karen.

Ito-san.

Ito-san, would you maybe like
to possibly join...

[phone buzzing]

Hello?

Yes, I'll be right there.

Uh, I'll, um, see you next time.

[chuckles]

- [door opens]
- [employee] Have a good night.

[rain pattering]

[mysterious music playing]

[thunder rumbling]

[officer 4] Any survivors?

[officer 5] None so far.

[tense music playing]

[officer 6] Looks like the media's here,
so be careful.

[officer 7] Coming through.
Please stay back.

[officer 8] Put it down for a moment.
Hey, don't touch his head.

[indistinct police chattering]

[indistinct chattering]

[camera beeps, shutter clicks]

[indistinct chattering continues]

Get a photo.

I'm on it, boss.

[camera shutter clicks]

[Karen] I have a few questions.
How many people are dead?

[camera shutter clicks]

[music fades]

[birds chirping]

[tranquil music playing]

Morning.

[boy] 62, 63,





- [Haru] Morning, Riku!
- [Riku gasps] Aw, man!

- I lost count.
- [Haru] What are you counting?

There's something weird
about our house. Look.

Riku, breakfast.

- Oh, you're home.
- [Haru] Morning.

Grandma, breakfast is ready.

Yeah!

[Riku groans]

[reporter] Crude oil prices
are continuing to rise.


The price of regular gasoline...

[Riku] Grandma?

What the...

Weren't you just...

Hmm. Okay.

[reporter] All industries have been
on high alert about the situation.


- Morning.
- [woman] Morning.

[Riku] Looks good.

[reporter continues indistinctly]

[woman 2] Gaku.

Good morning.

[reporter] And now for our next story.

A brass lion incense burner,

which was stolen from the exhibition room
at Odawara Castle,


mysteriously returned last night.

The incense burner,

which is considered to be associated
with Hojo Ujimasa,


disappeared mysteriously
only three days ago.


Late last night,
while police were on patrol...


[man] You're eating.

Haru.

Come to work at the brewery.

[Haru] I told you I don't want to.

You will be in charge of it eventually.

I'm not cut out for it.

[woman 1] That's true.

Nagi can take over.

Brewing sake? No, thanks.

I'm only interested in doing one thing.

[Riku] What?

[Riku] Come on, tell me.

[Nagi] You're the same. Right, Dad?

You're just a shinobi like I am.

Here. Do these too.

[Haru] Do 'em yourself.

- [phone buzzing]
- Oh. Who...

I'm gonna drop 'em.

Kyotani-kun, I'm done.

- [Kyotani] Wanna go now?
- Yeah.

- Wait, really?
- [Nagi] Why not? Let's go.

- But what about class?
- [Nagi] What about it?

We'll skip it.

- Mm-hmm.
- 'K, bye!

- Want breakfast?
- [Haru] I already ate.

- See ya later.
- [Haru] I'm going to bed.

[man] Morning.

[woman 2] Morning.

Today's lucky color.

[chuckles]

[Riku] Mom.

Hmm? What is it?

Is our family very rich?

[laughing]

Why do you ask?

None of my friends
live in a house this big.

[mother] I guess we're lucky. Just Eat.

[Riku] Then are we poor?

[grandma laughs]

Riku, stop asking questions.
Eat your food.

- [Riku] Just one more.
- One more.

Am I adopted?

[laughing]

[sighs] What?

I think I'm different from everybody else.

You're the same. [clears throat]

Riku... [tuts]...you're normal.

Our whole family... are all the same.

[laughing]

[sarcastically] Normal, right. [laughs]

[man chuckles, laughs]

[mother] Oh, not again.

[mysterious music playing]

[sighs]

[groans, grunts]

[wings flapping]

[pigeon cooing]

Sh!

Go on! Shoo!

Get lost!

Hey! Hey!

We could fix up
the house with that pigeon.

You get that, right?

Next time, use the ladder!

Be normal.

What if someone sees you?

[sarcastically] Yeah. Normal, my ass.

[sighs] God.

[hammering]

[grunting]

[muffled hammering]

[Haru] That's so loud.

- [ominous music playing]
- [gasps]

[high-pitched squeal]

[blade rasps]

[panting]

[whimsical music playing]

MAKE JAPAN STRONG
VOTE MUKAI

{\an8}TAWARA BREWERY

Good morning.

[sighs]

RESIGNATION LETTER

What's this?

Apologies.

The brewery. It's over.

The funds won't even last to next year.

Uh...

- There has to be something we can...
- There is.

You can accept the subsidy
from the government.

Uh...

That's something we...

And why can't we?

Even though it's a public subsidy?

I've been trying to fix this
for six years.

I can't anymore. I can't.

Just give me a little time.

- All right?
- How much more time?

You have no funding, no plan.

And where's your successor, huh?

[moans]

These past 28 years have been a pleasure.

Nishio-san, please wait!

Someone's here to see you.

Ah, Tawara-san.
Hamashima, Cultural Affairs.

I came by to refresh you
about our agency's policy

on subsidies for the preservation
of cultural properties.

Excuse us.

- [man] Take a five.
- Oh. Yes, sir.

Let me introduce you to the new guy.

Oki, say hello.

Oki Masamitsu.

It's an honor to meet you.
I feel like I'm dreaming.

Are... are you real?

I'm actually meeting a descendant
of the legendary Hattori Hanzo.

- I could die happy right now.
- Please stop that.

What do you want? Why are you here?

[Hamashima] I sent a carrier pigeon.
Did you get the message?

If I see another one of your pigeons,
I'll break its neck and feed it to my cat.

A new shinobi thr*at
has recently showed up.

The shinobi's are done!

I'm pretty sure we ended all the Fumas.

You're aware of
the pleasure cruise incident?

It looks like
a new kind of poison was used there.

Why don't you
just let the police handle that?

[Hamashima] It's too much for them.

I want you to come back to work for us.

Only shinobi can help.

Get lost.

We're just a normal family now.

Is everyone satisfied then
with being a normal family these days?

What's that?

Your brewery is on its last legs, right?

What would Gaku think if he saw you now?

[uneasy music playing]

[groans]

[grunts, gasps]

Why don't you say his name to me again?

The Tawara's are
the only ones who can help.

I have no intention
of putting my family in danger again.

- Sir, do you have a second?
- [man] Hmm?

[clears throat]

- They were just leaving.
- Yes.

I appreciate you taking
time out of your day.

Sorry.

You're late.

Sorry.

Wow, amazing!

[boy] Yeah, it is.

What are you... doing?

Nagi-chan.

Will you be my girlfriend?

[sighs]

Um, I can't.

[chuckles uncomfortably]

Why not?

It's not you, Kyotani-kun.

It's just

a rule.

A rule? What do you mean?

Sorry.

I don't really know how to explain it, but

I'm just a weirdo.

But I like that about you.

That's why I've been
skipping school with you.

And I'm eating less meat.

I'm sorry.

Can we just be friends?

[Kyotani] I thought you felt the same way.

[whimsical music playing]

[cheerful background music playing]

- [woman] Excuse me.
- [employee] Yes?

[woman] Can you tell me
where I can find salt?

[employee] Oh, it's going to be
in aisle six.

[woman] Okay, thank you.

- [cashier 1] Thank you. Have a nice day.
- [cashier 2] Next, please.

[sighs]

[pensive music playing]

Uh, excuse me. I need to get by.

Sorry.

Come on.

[panting]

Excuse me. You dropped thi...

[tense music playing]

You passed.

That kindness of yours will help lead us
to the success of our solar eclipse.

It's almost time.

Wait for instructions.

[tense music continues]

[breathes shakily]

[music fades]

[uneasy music playing]

[mysterious music playing]

[music fades]

[man 1] Detective?

[man 2] Hello, Detective.

- We're glad you're here.
- Ah.

Omi-san!

- [Omi groans] I think I'm cursed.
- Huh?

I said I was cursed.

I was hoping I wouldn't have to
deal with these steal-and-returns.

[groans, tuts]

It's probably gonna be
another black mark on my career.

I really wonder
what the point of all this is.

[Omi] Beats me.

Maybe some kind of training?

[woman] Training for what?

- [Omi] This?
- [woman] Yeah.

WILL BRING IT BACK IN 3 DAYS

[Omi scoffs]

I guess we wait.

- Get the tent, huh?
- [chuckles]

- Are we camping?
- You could say that.

[both laugh]

[Omi sighs]

[grunts softly]

[sighs]

Okay.

[mysterious music playing]

[sighs happily]

[sighs]

- [Gaku] I knew you'd do it, Nagi.
- [laughs]

But the most important thing is...

[chuckles]

Is to sneak back in
and return it without getting caught.

[Gaku] Mm-hmm.

[Nagi laughs]

Ooh! I wish
I could tell everyone what I did!

- [Nagi laughs]
- You should be proud.

[Nagi] Hmm?

Shinobi becomes one with the shadows.

Nobody knows we exist.

But we are the defenders of this country.

Remember, don't skip training.

Yeah, I promise.

[Nagi] Don't tell anyone.

All right, Hanzo?

[purring]

Oh great.

[typing]

NINJA-STYLE GRAPPLING HOOK

YOUR ORDER HAS BEEN PLACED.

[mysterious music playing]

Okay!

- [cans clattering]
- [man 2] Your family runs a sake brewery.

Which means you can drink
as much sake as you want, huh?

[laughs] Hey, I'll take over
if you don't want it.

It sounds amazing.

[Haru] Go ahead
and knock yourself out, man.

Yeah, right!

If you're letting it go that easy,
I don't want it.

- [Haru] Why not? You can have it. Here.
- Oh.

Time to get it on with gyudon.

- [Haru] Yep. Let's go.
- Okay.

Huh?

[tense music playing]

[Haru breathing anxiously]

[blade rasps]

[music swells]

[music fades]

[background music playing]

Is that the only thing you eat?

Huh?

I mean, are there other types of food
you like eating too?

Uh, well, I eat gyudon...

[chuckles] I, um...

I'm trying to ask you out.

Yeah.

What?

How's tomorrow?

- Uh, yes.
- [chuckles contentedly]

Can I...

Okay.

What are you in the mood for?

Something other than gyudon would be good.

- [giggles] Okay.
- [chuckles]

I'll call you, then.

- Thanks a lot!
- [employee] See you again!

[door closes]

[employee] Coming right up.

That smell's gonna stick.

Don't forget that both romance
and eating meat are against the rules.

That's really too bad. She is pretty.

Are you feeling lonely?

We can set you up with someone
who's been vetted if you want.

That's exactly what your parents did.

But you already knew that.

Or do you plan on...
maybe staying a virgin your entire life?

{\an8}- [Haru] Thanks for the food.
- Thank you very much.

{\an8}Your little crush is dangerous.

Let me show you

why she is here every night.

Hmm?

- [man] Haru.
- [knocking at door]

[man] Open the door.

It's time.

Come to the brewery.

What are you talking about?

[man] You are taking over at some point.

Isn't the sake brewery just a front?

Give it up.

[man sighs]

It's been handed down through generations.

We can't survive without it.

Riku is still really young.

- There's school expenses...
- Ask someone else.

Haru.

You're my oldest son now.

I'm sure it's what

Gaku would want.

I'm not.

I can't replace Gaku, okay?

Whenever you are ready,

I will be waiting.

[door closes]

[pensive music playing]

[sighs]

[pensive music continues]

[mysterious electronic music playing]

[breathing heavily]

[both grunting]

[tense music playing]

- [music fades]
- [masked ninja panting]

[masked ninja sobs]

[masked ninja sniffles] Please. [gasps]

[chokes] Don't k*ll me. [whimpers]

I have a future ahead of me.

[cries]

[masked ninja]
Just like the future ahead of you.

[masked ninja gasps, whimpers]

[masked ninja] I'm begging you.

[masked ninja sobs]

[masked ninja grunts]

[masked ninja gasping]

[mysterious electronic music playing]

[grunting]

[yells]

[blood squelching]

[music stops]

[ninja 1 sighs]

Tell me who ordered you to come here.

We only serve our cause, not man.

[grunting]

[blood squelching]

[gasping]

Every shinobi serves a lord.
Who ordered you here?

[ninja 2] You know nothing about us.

We Fuma serve no one.

Fuma will meet their end.

Remember this moment.

- [blood squelching]
- [gasping]

[ninja 2] We Fuma Kotaro will never die.

I'll meet you again at the Demon Gate.

[tense music playing]

[gasping]

[tense music continues]

[inaudible]

[music swells]

- [gasps]
- [music fades]

[breathing shakily]

[mysterious music playing]

[Hamashima] She's a reporter, sniffing
around the pleasure cruise incident.


Yeah. And?

She's sticking her nose
too close into shinobi territory.

It might not be you that she's after,
but the whole Tawara family.

Investigate her.

You know I'm done with missions.

Haru... think about it.

We eliminate people who become aware
of the secret of shinobi,

along with any shinobi who are exposed.

Go ahead. I'd like to see you try.

You think I won't be willing to do that?

The world doesn't need shinobis.

[Hamashima tuts] I'm counting on you.

[mysterious music continues]


PORT HEIGHTS #608

Stop right there.

[sighs]

[mysterious music continues]

SORRY, I CAN'T MEET UP TODAY AFTER ALL

[Hamashima] Nice to see you, Yoko.

It's been a while, Hama-san, hasn't it?

Pepper?

Is the Tawara family
that strapped for money, hmm?

Or

is this just a case
of being bored to death, huh?

Why don't we get to the point?

You've been using your shinobi skills
without being authorized to do so.

That is a punishable offense.

You're asking me to accept a mission,
and you'll overlook it.

- You do get to the point.
- What's the pay?

The police won't get involved.
That should be enough compensation.

We have house expenses, kids in school,

and you know
how the sake brewery is doing.

What's the pay?

[sighs]

The same as it was six years ago.

I'm in.

Tell me what you need.

You're aware of
the pleasure cruise incident?







[groans]

- 115.
- [phone chimes]

[sighs]

NINJA-X STARTED FOLLOWING YOU

[uneasy music playing]

POSTS: 42- FOLLOWERS: 1- FOLLOWING: 0

YOU CALL YOURSELF A SHINOBI?

WHO IS THIS?

THE BEST SHINOBI ARE LIKE SHADOWS

- [uneasy music continues]
- [indistinct chattering]

[girls laughing]

[electronic music playing in background]

[indistinct chattering]

[electronic music continues]

- [pumpkin] Did anyone follow you?
- Nobody. No one followed me.

[Karen] Why me?

[pumpkin] No one else took me seriously.

[Karen] What information do you have?

[pumpkin] The boat incident.
It's just a rumor that everyone d*ed.

Someone survived.

That's who did it.

Can you give me a name?

[crowd cheering]

[Kn*fe slices]

[pumpkin] Promise you'll publish this.

The boat was a test.
Something worse is being planned.

Not drinking?

Probably hard to with that mask on.

What about a name? Do you have that?

- [pumpkin] Can you come with me?
- What?

[pumpkin] I can show you
that I have proof!

Can you repeat that?

[pumpkin] Never mind! Forget it.

I'll just tell you!

- [pumpkin] The yellow flower is...
- [Kn*fe slices]

[grunting]

- Alone? Want something to drink? I'll buy.
- [Karen] Excuse me.

- [man 1] There's seats in the back.
- [man 2] Let's go there.

[grunts]

[grunting]

[breathing nervously]

[grunts]

[crowd screaming]

- [music stops]
- [screams echo]

[silence]

["Nothing's Changed"
by The Zombies playing]

♪ It's a mistake going back ♪

♪ They tell me
That nothing's the same ever again ♪


♪ But when you walked through the door ♪

♪ It was just like before ♪

♪ Oh, nothing's changed, no... ♪

- [tires squeal]
- [loud thud]

♪ When I saw you again, little girl ♪

♪ Something stopped here inside
And I wanted to hold you ♪


♪ And tell you I loved you
Just like before ♪


♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ This is just one day, but one day... ♪

[man] What happened?
Somebody call for an ambulance!

Is he okay? Oh my God!

♪ Give me just one day
And we will begin all over again... ♪


[man 2] Is he okay?

♪ You didn't mean to hurt me before
But you did ♪


♪ You did ♪

♪ But now you're sorry now, I know ♪

♪ Oh, you're sorry now, I can see ♪

♪ 'Cause when you saw me again ♪

♪ You smiled at me then
Like nothing's changed, no ♪


♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ This is just one day ♪

♪ But one day is enough
To start all over again ♪


♪ Give me just one day
And we will begin all over again ♪


♪ It's gonna be easy this time, I know ♪

♪ I know ♪

♪ Come on, just try me one more time ♪

♪ I know it's gonna work out just fine ♪

♪ Start all over ♪

♪ Start all over ♪

♪ Again ♪

[music ends]

[mysterious music playing]

[music fades]
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