02x03 - Plan Brain from Outer Space

[bunniefuu]

Gee, brain,

What do you
want to do tonight?

The same thing
we do every night,
pinky,

Try to take over the world.

♪ They're pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Yes, pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ One is a genius

♪ The other's insane ♪

♪ They're
laboratory mice ♪

♪ Their genes
have been spliced ♪

♪ They're dinky ♪

♪ They're pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain, brain

♪ Brain, brain, brain,
brain, brain ♪

♪ Before each night
is done ♪

♪ Their plan
will be unfurled ♪

♪ By the dawning
of the sun ♪

♪ They'll take over
the world ♪

♪ They're pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Yes, pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Their twilight campaign

♪ Is easy to explain

♪ To prove
their mousey worth ♪

♪ They'll overthrow
the earth ♪

♪ They're dinky ♪

♪ They're pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain, brain

♪ Brain, brain,
brain, brain ♪

Narf!

Brain: months of interstellar
email has finally brought me

To this historic moment
of interplanetary accord.

[Woman screams]

Here I am, awaiting
the most important contact

Ever made by an earthling,

And somebody has
nothing better to do

Than watch that silly tv.

Zort! Sorry,
brain. I just love
the z-files.

All the aliens
and weird gizmos
and thingies.

I'd rather
meet a real alien,
wouldn't you, pinky?

I don't know, brain.
You mean like xuxa?

No, pinky.

My new intergalactic
pen pal zalgar is coming
to earth tonight

To help me
take over the world.

Ah, I've outsmarted
the most brilliant
brain on earth.

He thinks I'm
going to help him,

But i, zalgar,
plan to trick him
and eat his brain.

Zalgar, scout synapse
reporting.

I've detected
the immense brain waves
of your latest pen pal.

Closing in for a visual.

Ah, earth.

Home of the most
intelligent brain
in the galaxy.

Show me
the edible part.

Yes, yes.

There it is.
There it is.

Fetch it.

Wrap it up.

Put it in a box
so I can eat it.

Righty-o, sir.

Roger, night owl.
Bogie is now visual.

Lockin' and engagin'.

Huh?

Uh-oh.

Abandoning ship.

Hoo-eee! We got us
a hit, night owl.

Blue falcon
returning to base.

This is a fine mess.

I'll have to go
get him myself,

Or eat some
other brains.

Hmm...

Like yours.

We interrupt our program
with a special report.

We are speaking
live via satellite
with general odin.

General, locals claim
they saw a ufo crash-land
just over an hour ago.

Rumor has it
it's been transported
to a top-secret location.

Now, that's just plain
poppycock, frances.

Now, what we have here
is a weather balloon

That encountered
some swamp gas,

Was struck by lightning,
and fell by a local
frisbee tournament.

Happens all the time.

That man is lying.

Observe the rate
at which he blinks.



Zounds, brain.
Amazing.

You know what
this means, pinky?

Um, he should
change his name
to mr. Blinky?

No, pinky.

It means there is
a spaceship

And the government
is hiding it.

Look at that
rock formation.

The devil's doughnut,
near roswell, new mexico.

Pinky: ooh,
how scenic.

They probably
have the alien craft
somewhere nearby.

Zalgar's late.

It must be he
who was sh*t down.

Now he can go to all
the sights of new mexico,

Like the statue of liberty
and london.

Ooh, I wish I could
go sightseeing.

Thank you,
rand mcnally.

Brain: now
off to roswell.

Where's my
little pen pal?

Oh, blast.

He's gone,

But his brain trail's
still fresh.

Mmm. I can almost
taste him.

[Evil laughter]

Earthlings are
so primitive.

Theory of relativity. Ha!

Bah. I would pick
an inconsiderate pen pal

Who doesn't keep
his appointments.

I have to eat his brain
soon, or I'll starve.

Would you like some
of my internal organs?

Empty calories!

Only a brilliant brain
can satisfy me.

Go away.

Alas. We'd better
find him soon,

Or I'll have to settle
for d*ck cavett.

Whoo, whoo.

I think I can.
I think I can.

Oh, I wish you
wouldn't, pinky.

Now, in order
to rescue zalgar,

We must outsmart
the greatest minds
of the m*llitary.

Like gomer?

[Imitating gomer pyle]
surprise, surprise, surprise.

Ha ha ha!

That is the kind
of behavior

That got us thrown out
of the dining car.

Remember, pinky,
no slip-ups.

These sentries
are trained
to sh**t first

And ask
questions later.

Surprise, surprise,
surprise.

Uh--

A surprise inspection.

You must be
general maltese
and general jones.

Why, yes.

Your vigilance
has earned you

A commendation,
soldier.

Well, go-o-o-lly.

I'm actually glad
to see you fellas.

I've been on watch all night
for these 2 lab mice.

H.q. Claims they're trying
to take over the world.

Isn't that the silliest
thing you ever heard?

Ha ha ha!

Hear that, brain?

Carry on, soldier.

This is where the government
keeps things

They don't want
anyone to see.

You mean like
everyone's butt?

Oh, my. What next?

Creature of earth
called brain,

I, zalgar, have
come, ironically,
to eat your brain.

Ha ha. Witty,
aren't i?

Ah, I'd recognize
that brain trail
anywhere.

Hello, pen pal.

At last we behold
each other personally.

Through clever use
of email,

I have lured you
here to consume
your cerebrum.

Is that so?

Judging from
your last message,

You don't even know
how to spell cerebrum.

At least I don't
put smiley faces
on every line.

Oh, yeah? Well,
you're a weenie.

Nyah, nyah,
nyah, nyah, nyah.

Oh, good one, brain.

Thank you, pinky.

Now run.

Oh, dear.

Maybe I was mistaken
about the cranial capacity
of that little fellow.

Zalgar's never wrong.

He's just trying
to throw me off track.

We'll see who's a weenie,

Or should I say a pancake?

Pinky: we need to throw
a monkey in his works.

Brain: you mean
a monkey wrench.

No. I mean a monkey.

Waaaaaaah!

Look, pinky.
There's a tool box.

I'll show you
what I mean.

It's called
a monkey wrench.

Maybe later.

I still think
we need a monkey.

Where would we find
a monkey at this hour?

Over there.

Technically,
it's a sasquatch, pinky,

But I won't
argue the point.

Aah!

Now, move out
of the way, pinky.

[Roaring]

Out of my way,
nature boy.

Arrrrrrrrr!

Zalgar: time to see
the chiropractor.

Look at this, pinky.

Pinky: ooh,
a giant eye.

Egad, brain.

This must be the ship
that was sh*t down.

Are you pondering
what I'm pondering?

Ooh, I think so, brain,

But I think I'd rather
eat the macarena.

No, pinky.

If I knew how
to fly this thing,

We could use it
to defeat zalgar.

Gee, brain. Looks
just like something
from z-files.

This thingamajig
is the steering wheel,

And this
whatsamahoozit runs
the engine thrusters.

Pinky, at last,
your mindless tv
viewing is helpful.

Poit! Oh,
stop it, brain.

You're making me
feel all goosey.

Very well, then man
the helm, mr. Pinky,
and take us out.

Um, narf! I can't
do that, brain.

What now, pinky?

Well, the poor little
snakey worm has an owie.

Oh, mr. Wizard
would be proud.

I have a pen pal
who calls me a weenie
and ruins my back.

That's a fine
how do you do.

Where was that tool box?

We need to fix
your broken snakey worm.

Hmm, maybe that man
can help us.

Only if a handsome
prince wakes him up.

Zalgar: my dinner
has a first name.

It's b-r-a-i-n.

I am about to
douse you liberally
with brain-aise sauce.

I hope it's not
lumpy brain.

Your concern for
the way I'm cooked
touches me, pinky.

Shh.

Brain, I've been gooped.

Hang on, pinky.

This cryogenic
chamber gives
me an idea.

How would you like
to be prepared?

Baked or broiled?

Chilled, thank you.

Synapse: back to
the chiropractor.

Zalgar:
ohh! Aah! Eeh!

Dear pen pal,
I'm back in one piece

And feeling
fitter than ever.

My stomach is empty.
Wish you were there.

You needn't reply,
as this is our final
correspondence.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Brain tartare,
coming up.

Egad. If zalgar
eats your brain, what
will your new name be?

Hurry up, pinky.

Zort. That's almost
the same as my name.

The tools!
The tools!

Quickly, pinky.
We can fix the other ship.

I've got
the monkey. Poit!

Wa-ha-haaaaa!

Whoa!

Whoa-ho-ho-ho!

Now to suck his brain.

Oh-ho!

Yoo-hoo!

Ah, the sweet taste
of victory.

Ah ha ha!

Whoa-whoo!

Ah ha ha!

Oh, this is great, brain.
You should try it.

Ha ha ha!

Brain-o-vac: intelligence of
entree is dangerously low.

What, an idiot?

Impossible.

Warning,
expl*si*n eminent.

Oh!

To the eyeball, pinky.

Eye, eye.
Ha ha. Joke.

Weenie!

Pinky:
♪ eye, eye, eye, eye

♪ I'm flying an eye ♪

Zalgar:
to the mother ship!

You moved
my view screen.

I'll have to
move it back.

Pinky:
let's see the sights
in our eyeball ship.

Where are you
going, pinky?

Statue of liberty.

Refresh my memory.

Did zalgar
eat your brain or not?

Fire blastophone,
neuron.

[Honks]

Pinky: see, brain.
Good thing we saw it
when we did.

What are you
doing, pinky?

Taking a little
tour, brain.

I think we have
more pressing
concerns.

But, brain,
it's a beautiful
night for sightseeing.

We could go to graceland
and dollywood

And the museum of pants.

Brain, why don't you
turn on the radio?

You've lost it, pinky.

I'm blind!

Our sightseeing
tour is over.

Evidently flying school
doesn't accept pen pal
weenies.

Brain: hmm,
maybe flying blind
isn't such a good idea.

Pinky: told you.

Well, one of these
has to re-open it.

Pinky:
that wasn't it!

Try to outsmart me,
will they?

I don't think they realize

That I'm not only president
of the brain-eaters club.

I'm also a member
of cranial crunchers
incorporated,

Noggin noshers anonymous--

Stupid view screen.

Pinky:
peek-a-boo. Ha ha.

Brain: finally.

Oh, dear.

Pinky, I told you

If you kept playing
around with this ship,

You'd put out
somebody's eye.

This sightseeing
has to stop, pinky.

Zalgar: oh, no.
The sightseeing
has just begun.

If you look out the back
of your eyeball,

You'll see you are
almost within the grasp
of your ex-pen pal,

And so, to conclude
our flight,

Please return
your tray tables to
the upright position,

And we shall
serve a complimentary
one-course dinner to me.

Oh, brain, would you
ask the flight attendant

To get me
a complimentary
beverage?

Your little friend
is even more idiotic
than your email let on.

Blast. What is wrong
with this screen?

Locking tractor beam.

You'll never escape now.

Pinky: look. It's that
doughnut monument.

Brain: what did I say
about sightseeing?

Um, I forget.

Oh, dear.

Blast. Deserted
by my entree.

Perhaps I am...

A weenie.

I must admit
your sightseeing
paid off after all.

Good work, pinky.

Could you thank me
after we explode?

Uh, roger, night owl.
Bogie is now visual.

Lockin' and engagin'.

Whoo-wee!

That is a hit,
night owl.

Blue falcon
returning to base.

Poit! We've been hit.

Thanks for the news
flash, pinky.

Our mission, zalgar?

First we go home
and freshen up.

Then I shall log on
to the internet

And send an email
to my new pen pal...

d*ck cavett.

Pinky: nice hotel, brain.
Elvis is playing the lounge.

Don't bother me.
I'm planning for
tomorrow night.

What'll we do
tomorrow night, brain?

Explore the u.s.a.
In our big nose-mobile?

The same thing we do
every night, pinky,

Try to take over
the world.

♪ They're dinky, they're
pinky and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain,
brain, brain ♪