- This is me, eliza thornberry,
Part of your average family.
I got a dad, a mom, and a sister.
There is donnie-- we found him.
And darwin--he found us.
- [Jabbering]
- Oh, yeah, about our house--
It moves, 'cause we travel all over the world.
You see, my dad hosts this nature show,
And my mom sh**t it.
Okay, so we're not that average.
And between you and me, something amazing happened...
And now I can talk to animals.
It's really cool but totally secret.
And you know what?
Life's never been the same.
[Hooting and screaming]
[Upbeat percussive music]
♪
- Whoo!
[Laughing]
Oof!
[Panting]
Let's see the famous tyler tucker do that.
- I just want to see this famous cousin
You've been talking about for...
For-- oh, some long amount of time.
What do you call it again?
Days? Uh, hours?
- Weeks.
And he gets here today.
- What?
Oh, but I haven't groomed.
Oh, he'll think I'm no better than a warthog.
- Trust me.
Tyler's never been out of the suburbs.
He's never seen a warthog,
Let alone a chimpanzee.
- Really?
So he'll think I'm an exotic beast
And will feed me lots of treats?
Hoo-hoo! I can't wait!
-Ican.
I spend all my summers with tyler.
He's one big...
- Eliza!
Report to camp immediately!
That means now!
- Pain in the neck.
- We will be leaving camp at sharp!
That means dishes done, beds made,
Bug collections stowed and secured.
Anything else?
- Okay, let's see.
As soon as we get back with tyler,
We'll be all set to go down the river
To film the clawless otter.
Uh, oh, could you girls wash the comvee?
- Comvee must be washed!
Wait a sec.
Why do we have to wash it if we're taking it
Down some smelly river?
- Oh, but the congo
Isn't smelly at all, deborah.
It cuts through the heart of africa,
Crossing the equator twice.
- Truly fascinating, dad.
[Whining] mom...
- Oh, I guess it's clean enough.
- [Giggling]
Sorry, mom!
The roof got a little muddy.
- Nice going, ape girl.
[Engine turns over]
[Engine rumbling and rattling]
Grab a bucket and meet me on the roof.
Oh, and set the parking brake, will you?
- Yeah, yeah.
- [Jabbering]
- Tyler's gonna mess up my whole month.
- Is he really that bad?
- Yes, he always teases me
And tries to get me into trouble.
You have no idea.
- No, I can't imagine.
Nope. Haven't the foggiest.
No. Not a clue.
- And he's going to stick to me like glue,
So we have to be careful about talking, okay?
- [Jabbering]
- [Whispering] try to use the sign language
I taught you.
- But I only know a few words.
- Shh!
- If a gorilla can do it, so can a chimp.
- Uh? Hmm?
- Deb, are we moving?
- Didn't you set the parking brake?
Oh! - Oops!
[Both shrieking]
Debbie, grab these!
- Who do I look like? Sheena, queen of the jungle?
- Whoo! - Agh!
- Just do it!
- Whoa! - [Screams]
[Shrill shrieking]
- Wow!
What's that bird, uncle nigel?
- That's a common waxbill,
Known for its colorful plumage and shrill cry.
[Debbie screaming]
- That's no bird!
That's debbie!
[All screaming]
[Crashing and thudding]
- [Coughs]
Hey, tyler.
Long time, no see.
- Isn't that your trailer?
[Rumbling and rattling]
- [Gasps]
[Crashing]
- Girls...
- Debbie moved the comvee.
- Eliza forgot to set the parking brake.
- [Laughs] oh, man.
That's even better than the time
You didn't tie the boat to the dock.
- I did tie it.
My knot came undone.
- Kids, I think you're missing the point.
The rowboat drifted a few yards
In -foot-deep water.
What we have here is a large motor home
Stuck in a ravine.
- [Laughing and hooting]
Ooh? Hmm.
[Jabbering]
- Astonishing.
No fingers in the nose.
No yanking of the ears.
And he hasn't put a single bug in your hair.
[Laughs]
I'd say you've won over our donnie
In record time.
- Nigel, I'm worried about making our deadline.
We've only got three days to find the clawless otter,
And you know how rare they are.
What are we gonna do?
[Metal creaking]
[Clattering]
- Now, while those good men
Are taking care of raising our trusty comvee
From its cavernous prison,
We will go forth with our journey.
- But, nigel, how did you possibly arrange a boat
On such short notice?
- Oh, it took some wheeling and dealing, as they say,
But we'll cruise down the congo in true adventure style,
Much like henry morton stanley in .
- A cruise? [Gasps]
You mean with a breakfast buffet and a disco and a pool?
- Get real.
They didn't have disco in .
- I'm sure your father means we're following stanley's route
But in a modern powerboat.
- Oh, not at all, lovie.
Our vessel will be fueled by steam and wood.
- She's a beauty, uncle nigel.
- Yeah, dad. Oh, it's cool.
- Not "it."
Boats are always called "she"s.
- How do you know?
- Learned it at camp.
Besides, look at her name.
- [Scoffs] yeah, well...
If I were prudence,
I wouldn't be too thrilled
To have my name on this piece of junk.
[Clattering, steam hissing]
- Oh, deborah, you'll feel differently
When you get out on the river,
The tropical winds in your hair.
[Laughing]
All aboard!
[Boat whistle blaring]
- Kids, you all saw the life preservers, didn't you?
- Oh, don't you worry, aunt marianne.
I'm a champion swimmer.
- Just in case, ty.
- Tyler, don't.
There's crocodiles in the river.
- Oh, no, they're not.
The internet says
They stay on the banks this early.
- Oh, yeah?
Did the internet tell you
That crocodiles drag their victims underwater
And chomp them in half?
That they'll eat buffaloes, lions, and even people?
- Uh...no.
- Don't even try, tyler.
Miss fun fact will get you every time.
- Whew! Loaded and ready to go.
Everyone, we're on a tight schedule.
Anyone spots an otter, let me know.
- Sure, aunt marianne.
I'll find one for you. - Yeah, right.
You've never even seen a clawless otter.
- Aunt marianne! I see an otter!
- Oh! Where?
- [Scoffs]
[Slurping]
- Ooh!
[Sniffing]
[Grunts]
[Giggling]
Ooh, wha-ooh!
[Chuckles and jabbers]
- Nigel, look what tyler spotted.
Isn't it great having ty here, eliza?
Oh, this is perfect.
Ready to go on camera?
- Absolutely, lovely.
Tyler, perhaps you'd be my first mate
And steer the boat.
- No problem, uncle nigel.
- Might not be so bad having the kid around.
He can do all the work.
Great cds, ty! Thanks!
- No problem, cuz.
- "No problem, cuz."
"I'll find the otter, aunt marianne."
What a kiss-up.
- So what is with your sister and that chimp?
- Ha! Who knows?
I just tune it out.
- [Jabbers]
- Thanks, donnie.
- Just a warning.
You shouldn't eat anything that donnie gives you.
- [Gulps]
Oh, you're just trying to scare me,
Just like the time you told me
That raisins were bugs without legs.
- [Laughs]
You believed that for a year!
[Laughter]
- You remember that time I told you
I hit a home run out of yankee stadium,
And you fell for it?
- Yeah, like a seven-year-old plays major-league baseball.
- [Babbling and wailing]
Uhh, hmm?
[Laughs]
- Ah, right. Toss one across the plate.
- [Chuckles]
[Grunts]
- [Grunts]
Whoo-hoo! All right!
Home run for tyler tucker!
- Hoo...
- Don't worry, dude.
I'll get it.
- Tyler, no! You can't go in the water!
- Doesn't he know you have to wait an hour after eating
Before going in the water?
[Crocodile snarls]
- Oh, no! A crocodile!
- [Panting]
- Tyler, come back!
- I got to get the ball!
[Gasps]
- Tyler, don't panic.
There's a crocodile behind you.
Both: crocodile!
- [Gasps]
[Crocodile growls]
- No! You'll make him mad!
- [Grunts]
Tyler, grab this!
We'll pull you in!
- [Gasping]
- Hang on, tyler!
Hurry up! Nigel, nigel, come on!
Hurry, hurry, nigel! Come on! Pull it!
- [Babbling]
Whee-ow! Hoo-hoo!
- [Gasps]
Great gooseflesh!
Where's the boy?
- Guess I fooled that croc, didn't i?
[Laughs]
- Oh...
- Tyler, this isn't matawankic lake.
You can't go jumping into the water
Whenever you feel like it.
Oh, sometimes I think this life isn't safe for children.
- Oh, mom, when you're right, you are right.
Maybe we should all head back.
Thanks, ty, for showing us the error of our ways.
Check, please.
- Don't listen to debbie.
I'll make sure tyler doesn't get in any more trouble.
- Hey, I can take care of myself.
- Tyler, here in africa,
Life is fraught with danger.
Why, just last week,
Eliza had a serious encounter with a lioness.
- [Scoffs] I was totally fine.
- I suggest you handcuff the two kids together
And take your chances.
- I am not a kid. I'm a teenager.
- You don't turn for four more weeks.
We're the same age.
- [Scoffs] no, we're not.
You're still a kid.
- What?
- Marianne, they appear to be having
A bit of a cousiny spat.
What should we do?
- Oh, they'll work it out.
They just need to give each other some space.
[Thunder crashing]
- [Gibbering]
Wha!
- You're hogging the blanket.
- Well, I'm getting wet.
- Everyone doing all right?
- Right as rain, dearest.
[Laughs and snorts]
- [Groans]
I bet that stanley guy
Didn't travel down the congo
With his whole entire family and a monkey.
[Engine chugging]
- We'll head for stanley pool.
We're going to put on some speed,
As they say.
Would you children be loves
And check for rocks?
- Yeah, sure, dad.
- Okeydokey, uncle nigel.
Uncle nigel, turn quick!
There's a huge rock off port side.
- [Gasps]
- Your rock is a hippo.
[Laughs]
- Well, it looked like a rock.
- Oh, common mistake, my boy.
The hippo must keep submerged during the heat of day
As they have no sweat glands.
- Uncle nige, go a little closer.
I want to get a good sh*t.
- Absolutely not, tyler.
The hippopotamus
Is the most dangerous animal in africa.
- But they just eat grass.
- Oh, yes,
But that doesn't keep them from attacking
Anything that enters their territory.
- Yikes.
Kind of like eliza.
[Laughs]
- You are so annoying.
Dad, tell us a captain jack story.
- Oh, yeah, uncle nigel.
I haven't heard you tell one of those
Since I was a kid.
- Let's see.
When last we left our intrepid captain jack,
He was going to sail around the cape of good hope.
- That's in south africa.
- I know.
- [Clears throat]
Shall we, then?
As captain jack was loading his vessel
With foodstuffs and protection against pirates--
It being and everything--
[Chuckles]
He was approached by his cousin, um, elizabeth,
To journey with him.
- Huh? - His cousin?
- I thought captain jack didn't take anyone along.
- Normally, no,
But he made an exception.
After all, she was family.
- This doesn't sound like the captain jack I know.
- Children, I believe you are missing the point.
Ahem!
You see, after the two were chased by enemy ships
And survived rapids and dreadful leeches,
They became the best of friends.
- Dear, isn't that the plot ofthe african queen?
- [Mumbling]
- [Laughs]
You remember the time
When eliza got a bloodsucker on her at the lake
And she wouldn't stop crying?
- You would have cried too.
We were only .
-Youwere .
I was /.
- Oh... [Groans]
Well, perhaps we should call it a night.
Don't forget your mosquito netting.
Nothing like terra firma under our feet
And an unexplored jungle ahead.
We're bound to find some firewood.
- And the children can't get in any trouble on a boat.
Lead the way, captain jack.
- [Snoring]
- [Grunting]
Uncle nigel and aunt marianne
Won't be back for a while.
Time for a little spin.
- [Shrieking and babbling]
- Shh!
Avast, ye sleepyheads!
Captain tucker has taken command of theprudence.
- Gee, that's exciting.
- Oh, we're moving!
- Yeah, I want to drive this rust bucket.
- It's not a rust bucket.
I mean,sheis not a rust bucket.
- Isn't he/she/it going kind of fast?
- Oh, yeah.
I really stoked the fire.
Your parents are bringing back more wood,
So why not?
- That's why not!
- Oh, pssh!
Like I'm gonna fall for that.
It's just a bunch of hippos.
- I'm serious! Those are not hippos!
- I told you, tyler-- miss fun fact is never wrong!
- We're going to hit those rocks!
Whoa!
[Shrieks]
[All grunting and straining]
- [Wailing]
[All shrieking]
[Metal screeching and crunching]
- What was that?
- Uh, sounds like the propeller hit something.
- Okay, nobody panic!
Is that bad?
- It just means we can't move,
Thanks to tyler.
- So I made a little mistake.
- Little?
We're stuck out here!
- I'll just go down there and fix it.
- Nope. I'll go.
- You?
You can't hold your breath underwater
As long as me.
Besides, I'm a teenager.
- Not yet!
- Time-out!
Iama teenager,
So I will decide.
Now separate, and let me think.
[Water splashing]
- [Sniffs]
Dearest, I believe we're being tracked.
[Bells jingling]
Why, it's the basenji,
The faithful dog of the pygmies.
- I didn't even hear them bark.
- That's because they're barkless,
In order to hunt more stealthily.
- Hello!
Do you, by chance, have two girls, two boys,
And a chimpanzee
Traveling by small boat?
- You know, I really don't see why a champion swimmer
Has to wear this dumb rope around his waist.
- You don't know what's down there.
- Ty, tug on this
If you even think you see a crocodile,
And if we see something, we'll tug for you to come up.
- There might be snakes.
- Snakes?
I'll be okay.
[Inhales deeply]
- [Grunting]
- [Gasping]
- Did you fix it?
- Couldn't!
There was a snake!
- I'm going!
- [Jabbering]
- No. No. I'm okay.
It's probably gone now.
- [Babbling]
- Oh, both of you go, and make it snappy!
The place is crawling with crocs.
You guys are not going back down there.
- But we've got to fix this.
- No one leaves this boat.
[Both grunting]
Understood?
- I forgot how bossy she was.
- Hello? I heard that!
I'm only over here!
[Laughter]
- Ty, we're sinking!
We've got to get to shore!
- [Panting and gibbering]
- [Grunts] - ahh...
- Stay here! I need to talk--
Uh, I mean, assign something to darwin.
I've got a plan.
Tyler thinks I'm telling you in sign language.
- There's no time.
Just whisper it to me.
- I'm gonna get... [Whispering]
- [Hooting]
- Wow.
You're really good at this sign language stuff.
- Thanks. Now we can climb across.
- [Gibbering]
Wha-whoa!
- Donnie!
- [Gasps]
[Grunts]
- Come on, donnie.
[Grunting]
[Basenji baying]
- Heavens! Hippos!
[Hippos grunting]
Eliza! Get back in the boat!
- [Gasping]
[Crocodiles growling]
- [Gasping]
- Hey, hippo!
- You...
Get out of my river!
- I'm trying, believe me.
Could you just leave us alone?
- The boy is first,
Then you.
- I don't know about that.
Those crocodiles are pretty fast.
- Huh?
Crocs don't scare us.
- Looks like they want the boy too.
You might want to claim him,
It being your river and all.
- [Roaring]
[All snarling and growling]
- [Grunts]
- You okay?
- I went to the bottom,
And I stayed there as long as I could.
- [Sighs]
Good thing you're the champion
Of holding your breath underwater.
- I'm gonna miss that rust bucket.
- Wha-hoo!
[Gibbering]
- Gentlemen,
I can't thank you enough.
Here's the money for the comvee
And, of course, uh, forprudence.
- I never thought I would say this, but...
Home sweet home!
Dibs on the first shower.
- Ty, it's not too late to call your parents,
If you want to go home.
You've had quite an adventure
With those crocodiles and hippos.
- There's no dishonor in conquering the river congo
And calling it a day, my boy.
- Get out while you can.
- What do you think, eliza?
- What are you guys talking about?
Ty was supposed to stay four weeks;
He's staying four weeks.
He did great out there.
- Ah, I guess I did, didn't i?
So do I get to see the famous comvee now?
Where's my room?
Oh, I bet it's gonna be so great.
- Hold on, pirate boy.
I want to draw some boundary lines.
- Kids, wipe your feet.
- Ty, uh, perhaps I should show you
What doodads and gizmos you shouldn't touch.
- Oh, this is so cool!
- Like that one.
- Is this eliza's stuff?
- [Groans]
What am I doing out here?
[Objects clattering]
- [Laughs]
- You are so annoying.
03x03 - Tyler Tucker, I Presume
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
Eliza travels the world with her unusual family, as her parents make wildlife films.
Eliza travels the world with her unusual family, as her parents make wildlife films.