07x17 - Doug's Best Buddy

[bunniefuu]

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boop bop boop ♪

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boo-doo-bop ♪

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boo-doo-bop ♪

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boo-doo-bop ♪

[whistling]

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boo-doo-bop ♪

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop boo-doo-bop ♪

[chuckling]

[growling]

Hey! Hey! [screams]

[yelps]

[whistling]

[grunting]

Huh? Huh? [screams]

♪ Ba-ba-du-bop
Boop bop boop du-bop ♪

[Doug] Dear Journal,
the big day had finally come.

Bobby Badingo,

my best friend
when we lived in Bloatsburg,

is moving to Bluffington.

I know it's in here somewhere.

Look at all this old stuff,
Porkchop.

[snoring] Huh? Huh?

Whoa!

Whoa. Cool!

[Doug] Here it is!

This is Bobby.
We were best buddies.

"I've trapped you, Lobster Man!

you can't scuttle away from me!

It'll take more than shiny muscles

to stop my wave of crime,

Man-O-Steel Man!"

"Now taste my butter sauce of doom!"

-Wow!
-Wow!

We used to say we were
each other's best buddy.

Uh, best?

Don't worry.
He's my old best friend.

You're my new best friend.

Now we can all be
best friends together.

[horn honks]

It's Bobby and his mom!

Come on! I can't wait for you guys
to meet each other.

Here's Bobby!

D-ooh!

Ha ha ha ha!

Aah! Ooh!

Bobby? Is that really you?

[growling]

[whistling]

That's me.

[Bobby laughing]

[grunting]

Ha ha ha ha!

I said, who's your best buddy?

Ha ha ha! Ha!

You are, Bobby.

But, man, you've grown.

Yep, and I owe it all
to sugar-coated sugar flakes

and no exercise.

Ha ha ha ha! Which reminds me,

junk food break!

[gobbling]

[Bobby] Ha ha ha ha!

Bobby Badingo!
Where are your manners?

Oh... OK.

-Um...
-[Bobby] Wanna share?

Uh... no, thanks.

Oh, hey, Mrs. Badingo.

Oh, hi, Doug.

Bobby's been so looking forward
to seeing you again.

[Theda] Betty Badingo!

You look great!

Welcome to Bluffington.

Theda, it's so good to be here.

We have so much to catch up on.

Bobby, this is Skeeter.

Hi, scooter.

Whoop! What's that?

-Whoops! Gotcha! Ha ha!
-Bobby!

That's funny, huh, Doug?

Now, Bobby, behave.

That boy.

Come on, Bobby.
I found some of our old stuff.

Hey, let's race.

♪ Last one there is me ♪

-Get it?
-[Doug] I get it.

-Last one is me. Yeah.
-[grumbling]

Uh-uh.

[Doug] Hey, Bobby, remember this guy?

Wow! Commander Commando.

I'm Commander Commando.

I'm rough. I'm tough. My arms are buff.
I'm rough. I'm tough...

OK.

Ow! Commander down!

Medic!

Hmm. Wow! It's Man-O-Steel Man.

Hey, Doug, remember?

"Come meteor showers
or laser blast,

our lifelong bond
will last and last."

[both] "With secret handshake,
we hereby seal

our friendship forged of super steel!"

The Man-O-Steel Man
lifelong friendship oath.

It always gets me. [sobs]

Were those great times or what?

The best.

Whoa! Hey, look!

The Captain Powerful
neutron wrist phasers

we played super buddies with!

Yeah! You were
the Purple Partridge.

And you were Quailman.

Soon all of the herringbone
in the world will be mine!

[snickering]

[Quailman] Not so fast,
Vermilion Albatross!

I have no idea why you would want
to corner the market

on the bones of a small fish,

but first, you must face
the stupefying eye of the Quail!

And the neutron wrist phaser
of the Purple Partridge!

We've got you now!
Close in, Purple Partridge.

-Purple Partridge?
-[Bobby] Hey, big D! Big B!

Look what I found! A power helmet!

Ha ha ha ha! [smacking lips]

Ha ha ha ha!

Let the power be with me!

Easy, Bobby.

You're gonna get hurt,
or break the bed or something.

[yelling]

Oh, no...

I'm flying!

-[crash]
-[Bobby] Ow!

[Theda] Doug?
Is everything all right up there?

Uh... yeah.

Pretty much.

Uh-oh.

Oops.

[smacking lips]
Ha ha ha ha!

[grumbles]

-Hey, stop!
-You're it, Bobby!

-I'm tired!
-Come on, catch me.

-Come on, stop it, or I'll...
-Come on, come on, Bobby!

-...or I'll sit on you!
-Come on!

Thanks for making us
feel so welcome, Theda.

[sighs] I'm hoping this move
will be good for Bobby.

He was having problems
at his old school.

Now, don't you worry.

Doug will look out for Bobby.

He can introduce him
to all his friends.

-[crash]
-Huh?

Oh, sorry, Theda.

I'll replace it.

Whatever it was.

Oh, no. Don't even think about it.

[Bobby] Wow! There's gotta be, like,
a zillion comic books in there.

What'd I tell you?
Sully's has everything.

We can stop by after school.

Remember when we used to do nothin'

but read Man-O-Steel Man all day?

Yeah. Come on. We better get goin'.

Can't be late on your first day.

[sighs]

Those were the best times
of my whole life.

Whoops. Uh...

[Doug] Hey, Fentruck, Chalky.

Hey, to you, my friend Doog.

Am I delightful to be seeing you.

Hey, Doug. Comin' with the g*ng
Saturday to Funkytown?

They're opening
that new water ride.

You kiddin'?
I wouldn't miss it for anything.

Hey, I want you to meet my pal
from Bloatsburg, Bobby.

Huh?

Oh, there he is.

Ha ha ha ha!

-Hey, Bobby, I want you to meet--
-Yo, guys. What's shakin'?

-[yelling]
-Come to papa!

Ugh! Ooh!

Mmm! How sweet it is!

[loud belch]

Ta-da!

Aha!

[Doug] Hey, you're supposed to recycle.

Uh, Bobby, these are my friends.

Fentruck is our exchange student
from Yakastonia,

-And Chalky--
-Yakastonia?

Hey, hey! Ooh! You'll like this one.

How many Yakastonians does it take
to screw in a light bulb, huh?

None! 'Cause they don't have any!
Ha ha ha ha!

-Bobby!
-What?

Hey! Cool it!

That is really rude!

Me? Rude?

Wouldn't dream of it.

[loud belch]

Ahh! Even sweeter the second time around.

[smacks lips] Ha ha ha ha!

Real classy.

Come on, Fentruck. We'll be late.

See ya later, Doug.

See ya, guys.
They're nice, but, man!

Talk about zero sense of humor.

Bobby, what are you doing?
Those are my friends!

Look, can I help it
if your friends are uptight?

Anyway, they're not
your Man-O-Steel Man

lifelong friendship oath friends.

Bonds of super steel.

Remember?

Yeah, well...

Yeah. Say, big D,
where are all the babes at this school?

Babes? D-aah!

Well, never mind.
I know where we can find some.

-No!
-Here's Bobby!

[girls screaming]

Oh, man!

-Aah!
-Hey, Doug. What's going on?

Uh... well... um...

-[girls screaming]
-[Bobby laughing]

-Whoa!
-And stay out, ya big jerk!

Babes. [sighs] They just
can't get enough of me.

[smacks lips] Ha ha ha ha!

Who is that?

Uh, must be a new kid?

Big D, why'd ya leave?

Gettin' thrown out
is the best part.

You were in the girls' bathroom,
too, Doug?

Um...

He sure was.

Doug's my best buddy.

We do everything together.

And I'll bet you're just dyin'
to get to know me better.

-Right?
-I don't think so!

Eww! See you later, Doug.

But-- but--

Ah, forget about it!
They'll come around.

Who's your best buddy, anyway?

Come on. Let's go spit off the roof

and see who we can hit.

Oh, man!

[gobbling] Mmm!
The food here is--

It's great!

Not like our old school. Mmm!

You like the magic mystery meat?

Hey, watch this.

Ladies and gentlemen!

A preview of today's menu!

-Look!
-[all gagging]

I can't believe you just did that!

I think I'll be skipping lunch today.

Hey, what did ya think, Doug?
That's pretty funny, huh?

Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

[Bobby] These frothy goats
are kinda watery, huh, big D?

Not thick, like the
Megamonster Milkshakes back in Bloatsburg.

Hey, look.
There's some of your other pals.

[all chattering]

[whispering]
There they are! There they are! Shh!

Oh, uh, hey, guys.

Mind if we--

Oh, my!
Will you look at the time?

I have to go home and... wash my cat.

Oh, yeah, my bowling ball needs polishing.

What? You all have to go?

Now?

Ah, who cares
about those snobs?

We've got each other.

Come on, big d!

-Who's your best buddy?
-Ow!

[smacking lips]

Ha ha ha ha!

You are, Bobby.

You better believe it!

[Doug] Bobby is my best buddy
and all... I guess.

And we did take the Man-O-Steel Man
lifelong friendship oath.

But he's turned
into such a... a jerk!

I know. Maybe if I spend
less time with him,

he'll find some other friends.

And I'll be able to keep mine.

Hey, hiya, pal. How ya doin'?
Hey, hiya, babe.

Hey, glad to see me?
Hey, how ya doin'? Lookin' good.

[Doug] When I got to school
the next morning,

I did my best to avoid Bobby.

It wasn't easy,

But I got all the way
to band practice

without Bobby seeing me once.

[air horn blows]

Here's Bobby!

Hey, big D,
guess who just joined the band?

Told 'em I was a horn player.

[smacking lips]
Ha ha ha ha!

Get it?

Horn...

player!

[horn blaring]

Oh, noooo!

Doug, he's your friend!
Make him stop!

And the best news is,
I signed us up as partners

for the science fair!

And I joined the bluff scouts!

Now we'll be together all the time!

[horn blaring]

Perfect!

[Doug] After school, I was afraid
to go anywhere Bobby might find me.

So I hid out at the mall.

I figured that was the last place
I'd ever run into Bobby.

Oh, no!

Excuse me! Pardon me!

Comin' through!

Whoops!

Man, that was close.

Whew!

-[Bobby] Psst!
-Hmm?

Hey, big boy,

why don't you come up
and see me some time?

[smacking lips]

Ha ha ha ha!

Aaah! Whooah! Ooh!

-Oof!
-Oof!

Thank you for your patronage
and don't come back!

Ever!

Wasn't that great?

I'm so glad I moved to Bluffington.

Now we'll be together
forever and ever.

[groaning]

[humming]

[Bobby] Here's the Purple Partridge!

Hey! Big Q!

Whaddaya say we go to Millet King

and start a food fight?

-[chuckles]
-Millet King closed years ago.

[grunts]

Huh?

Hey! Hey, look, Quaily!
A power helmet!

Say, let's go to the movies

and make rude noises
during the mushy parts.

All the movie theaters
left town, too!

Well, then let's go ring
some doorbells

at superhero addresses
and-- and-- and run away!

There are no superheroes left in town!

Don't ya remember?

The entire league of Ultrabuddies
packed up and moved away...

Even Quaildog--

To get away from you!

[Doug] Bobby Badingo
was ruining my life.

But I took the Man-O-Steel Man
lifelong friendship oath,

so what could I do?

A promise is a promise.

[Doug] The weekend finally came.

It was time for a day at Funkytown.

All my friends were there

to try out the new
Maelstrom of Madness ride.

Except for Bobby.

I, um, didn't quite get around
to telling him about it.

Doug, I'm kinda glad to see
you're Bobby-free today.

Yeah, it's nice to see you

without that rude,
crude, obnoxious shadow.

In Yakastonia, we are having a saying
about people like Bobby.

It is... go away!

Can we just forget about Bobby?

Come on, y'all.

I hear this ride
is supposed to be great.

Say, what do you suppose it's like?

[Beebe] Looks pretty dark in there.

[Doug] I'd forgotten that Patti
was afraid of the dark.

This is so dark and spooky!

Put your arm around me, Doug!

Doug! Come on, Doug!
You're gonna miss the ride!

Wouldn't wanna do that! [chuckles]

[Doug] Yeah,
sure is dark, all right.

Whirlpool!

[both yelling]

That was great!

Oh, yeah! Great!

-Huh?
-Huh?

[growling]

-Aaah!
-Aaah!

[snapping]

-Oh!
-Oh!

[both sigh]

What a ride.

-Aaah!
-Aaah!

Oh ho ho ho ho!

Are you OK?

So far, so good,

But it looks pretty dark up there.

[Doug] Sure does.

Dark, dark, dark.

[Patti] Doug?

-Aaah!
-Aaah!

-Whoa!
-Whoa!

Doug!

[Bobby] Arrgh!
Avast, ye mateys!

Here's Cap'n Bobby!

Oh, no!

Prepare to be boarded,
ya scurvy knaves!

Aha!

Bobby! No!

Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha!

Uh-oh. Aaah!

[yelling]

Ha ha ha ha!

Ptoo!

[screaming]

[yelling]

[speaking Yakastonian]

Oh, the sinking of this boat
is most very realistic!

Oh, wow, this is so cool!

Ha ha ha ha!

[muttering and grumbling]

Is-- is everybody all right?

Yes! No thanks to your best buddy!

We could have been hurt!

Daddy! Lawsuit! Now!

[muttering in Yakastonian]

Skeet! I'm sorry!

-I--
-Not now, Doug!

I've got ride water
stuck in my ears.

Just like I told ya.

Zero sense of humor.

-Ooh!
-Hey, I got an idea.

Let's say we buy some peanuts,

we take 'em on the sky tram,

-we throw 'em on all--
-That's enough, Bobby!

-Stop it!
-Stop what?

Just... go away and leave me alone!

Hey... come on!

What's wrong
with my best buddy-- Huh?

I'm not your best buddy anymore!

Y-- Ya can't say that.
Ya can't break the oath.

Remember, our lifelong bond
will last and last.

Just stop it! You're the one
who broke the oath!

What kind of friend embarrasses you
in front of everyone?

You don't care about anyone
or anything but yourself!

This is just the way
it was in Bloatsburg.

No one ever wanted to be my friend.

Great.

[Theda] Better eat
before it gets cold, Doug.

Oh, by the way,
Betty Badingo called yesterday

and told me how much
you're helping Bobby.

She's so grateful.

You know,
Bobby had adjustment problems

at his old school in Bloatsburg.

I'm proud of you, mister.

Without your encouragement,

that boy might have gotten off
on the wrong foot.

He might have dropped out
of school... or worse.

We have you surrounded,
Purple Partridge!

[Purple Partridge] You'll never
take me, coppers!

[yelling]

[grumbling]

Look out! He's armed with latex-encased
fluid projectiles!

I got enough water balloons
in here to hold off an army-- ooh!

Drop it, Purple Partridge!

Your continent-wide crime spree

of hideous awfulness is over!

What's the use?

I can't fight you,
Man-O-Steel Man.

Before I take you to jail
forever and ever, son,

I've got to know.

What made you change
from a respected superhero

into an evil supervillain?

It was all Quailman's fault.

He was my best buddy.

And then he turned his back on me.

He even broke the Man-O-Steel Man
lifelong friendship oath.

Leapin' supersuits!

Quailman broke
the Man-O-Steel Man

lifelong friendship oath?!

Then it is all his fault.

Mm-hmm.

[Judy] Why so glum, Dougie?

It sounds like you finally
did something right.

[babbling] Pbbbbtt!

[Doug] The next day
my worst fears came true.

Hey, have you seen
Bobby Badingo anywhere?

He didn't show up for school today.

"I've trapped you, Lobster Man!

you can't scuttle away from me!"

[both] "It'll take more
than shiny muscles

to stop my wave of crime,
Man-O-Steel Man!

Now taste my butter sauce
of doom!"

That was always
my favorite issue.

I thought you were mad at me.

I was, but I got over it.

Great, big D! I knew ya would.

Now we can go on just like before.

Huh?

-No, Bobby!
-Wha?

Not just like before.

If you're really my friend,

you gotta do something for me.

OK, buddy. Anything.

You gotta back off!

When you act goofy and loud,

and pull your wild practical jokes,

it's just too much!

I'm only trying to be funny!

Doesn't anyone have a sense of humor
around here?

Yeah, they do,
but you come on too strong

and just end up
making everybody mad.

You know, you don't have to be
a big clown all the time.

You used to like baseball and music
and movies.

I still do.

Well, maybe if people
got to know that side of you,

they'd like you better.

How about it?

I don't know.
I guess I could try.

That's all I'm asking.

You got it.

Hey, how did you
find me here, anyway?

[Doug] Easy. Best buddies
can always find each other.

[Doug] Bobby kept his promise.

Over the next few weeks

he tried to act a little less goofy
and loud every day.

And he started to fit in.

It turned out he really was
a pretty good horn player.

And once he relaxed and stopped
clowning around all the time,

Everybody got to know him better.

They got to like him
a lot better, too.

I guess Bobby finally learned

that he didn't have to be
obnoxious to get attention.

[whispering]

Ta-da!

Ha ha ha ha!

[Doug] He was still Bobby!

[theme music playing]