02x12 - The Girl Who Cried Danger

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

- Ray, the whole idea of spring cleaning is

to get rid of stuffs.

You haven't gotten rid of even one stuff.

- Can we at least chuck these instructional videos?

- Oh, my "How to Fight Like a Man" DVDs.

Yeah, it didn't sell. Chuck 'em.

- Thank you.

Your leotard's freaking me out.

- No, no, no, no, no! Don't give these away.

- You just said we needed to get rid of stuffs.

- I know, but I've actually been watching these.

Here, you can donate this giant bag of rubber bands.

- No way. I got a plan for those.

- Come on, man, you do not have plans for these.

- Me and Bose are gonna wrap around a watermelon.

See how many it takes to make it explode.

[chuckles]

- I got a head start, boss.

- Hey, Bosey!

- I didn't want to start without you,

but my parents are super mad that I didn't clean my room,

and they're sending me to Jamaica for the weekend.

- How is that a punishment?

Like, how would that even work?

- Right? Parents are the worst.

- They gonna demand you fly there on a private jet, too?

- Get this, they're making me fly commercial.

Pray for me.

Down the tube.

- Something's wrong with those people.

- Found more boxes.

And why does Mika not have to help with spring cleaning?

- Because I'm researching Greasy Grady.

- Eh, give it up. We're never gonna catch that dude.

- Every time we get our hands on him,

he finds a way to slip out.

I think it's because he's covered in grease.

- Well, I'll catch him.

And when I do, he's gonna be covered in...

handcuffs.

- What are you talking about?

- I think someone doesn't know how handcuffs work.

- Oh, burn! [all laughing]

- Well, you'll all be laughing when I catch him!

- I'm laughing right now. - We're already laughing.

- I mean I'll be laughing, and so will Grady

because he'll be the one that--

[phone ringing] Oh, thank God, the phone.

The phone is ringing!

- Oh, my gosh.

- Danger Force, how can I help you?

Oh, you're in danger? At Duke E. Dawg's?

We'll be right there.

Everyone, shut up and pop a gumball.

We have a in progress.

- What is a ?

- If that's code for murdering a joke,

we just had one right here, right?

all: Oh! - The joke is dead.

- Has nobody even opened my book of danger codes?

- I have.

I've been hiding my pudding in here.

- A 's when someone's in trouble down at Duke E. Dawg's.

- Aww, you read it? - I have insomnia.

I helps me fall asleep. - I'll take that as a W.

[heroic music]

♪ ♪

- Wait, what's Duke E. Dawg's?

- That hotdog place with the ball pit and the video games.

- Literally every kid in town has

their birthday parties there.

- Well, I've literally never head of it until today.

- It's been around since the 's.

I mean, unless you were born in the 's--

- Oh-oh--Duke E. Dawg! I know Duke E. Dawg.

Yeah, yeah. To Duke E. Dawg's.

all: Duke E. Dawg's!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Duke E, where's the trouble, boy?

- [choking]

- Over by the ball blasters?

- In the ball pit?

- Good boy. - Ah!

- Help, help, I can't swim.

I need superhero assistance.

- That's the ?

- If anyone needs me, I'll be setting every high score

in the building.

- Volt, Shoutout, only you can save me.

- Sure. - Okay.

- Okay, come on. Out.

- Thank you.

You two really are the greatest.

- Thanks.

- Be careful around the ball pit, I guess.

- I'm Riley, I'm your biggest fan in the whole world!

Girl power!

both: Girl power.

- Hey, AWOL, can I get a picture?

- You sure can, little lady.

Oh.

You want me to take the picture.

I see how it is.

- Sweet shirt. - Did you make that?

- Of course, you two are my favorite members

of Danger Force.

- Aww. - That's so sweet.

- Yeah, yeah, they're great. Can we take this pic or wh--

- Will you shut up and take the picture?

- Ouch.

Just say cheese.

- Actually, for legal reasons, we can't say cheese

at Duke E. Dawg's, so we say, "Dogs!"

- Fine.

Say dogs.

all: Dogs!

- Okay, cool.

It was great saving you and getting hit with your shoe,

but there are people in actual danger out there, so--

- Oh, you can leave.

But Volt and Shoutout have to stay.

I haven't even played them my song yet.

- You wrote us a song? - Okay, you got me.

It's more of a rock opera.

[electric guitar music]

♪ Who you gonna call when you're sinking in a boat? ♪

♪ Shoutout and Volt, Shoutout and Volt ♪

♪ When you're getting kicked in the butt by a goat ♪

♪ Shoutout and Volt, Shoutout and Volt ♪

♪ It took weekends, , sequins ♪

♪ But now I got their pictures on my coat ♪

♪ Shoutout and Volt ♪ - All right, I'm outta here.

- ♪ Shoutout and Volt, Shoutout and Volt ♪

♪ I wanna show them ♪

♪ Just how much I love them ♪

- ♪ Really wanna get to know them... ♪

- Hey, man, girl's freaking me out

worse than you're old leotard.

I'm leaving.

- Uh, yeah, yeah, I'll be right here.

[clears throat]

Yeah, you hear that, moles? It's time for me to go.

So I'm just gonna set this mallet down

right here--yeah, you fell for it!

Yeah, you stupid moles!

Yeah, say hello to Rami Mallet!

- Come on, stop, stop. - Yeah!

No! - Hey, man, come on, calm down.

Calm down, man. - No!

- Calm down, dude! - No!

- You're scaring the children.

- ♪ Shoutout and Volt ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Oh, my God, Miles, look.

- Sorry, I'm doing important work over here.

- Riley make little Shoutout and Volt sculptures

out of all our favorite candies.

- I guess that's fun.

If you like candy.

- What's wrong with him?

- He's just jealous. - No, I'm not.

- Wait for it.

- It's just that-- - There it is.

- This whole thing with Riley, I just feel like

she's being a little extra.

- Extra?

- Yeah, like getting three ketchups

when you ordered small fries.

That's too much ketchup. It's extra.

- Well, is it extra that made a candy head

for you, too?

- She did? Where is it?

[both laughing]

- Psych!

But now we know you're really just jealous.

Oh...

- This guy jealous of your clinger?

- Uh, no, he's jealous of our superfan.

- Yeah, she's a stage one clinger.

- What's a clinger?

- Oh, my God, you guys don't know what a clinger is?

Superhero teachable moment! Everybody, in the classroom.

- Wait, wait, wait.

One more rubber band?

- Ah, one more. - Yes.

[tense music]

- Okay. - There you go.

- Careful. - Looks good.

- Oh.

- Whoa. [all shouting]

- Eh. - Oh.

- I thought it was gonna blow up--

♪ ♪

- As a superhero, you'll encounter many types

of unhealthy fans, or, as I call them,

clingers.

- Riley isn't like that.

- Yeah, her love for us is totally healthy.

She it was in the sixth verse of her song.

- She literally put herself in fake danger

just to meet you guys.

- That's stage one on the Captain Man clinger scale.

She does it again, that's stage two,

which usually leads to stage three.

The Clipping of Hair.

- This is stupid. Riley is totally chill.

- Yeah, now that's she's met us,

I'm sure we won't even hear from her again.

- Guys, a call came in. There's an emergency.

- [gasps] I wonder who it could be.

- Please don't be Riley, please don't be Riley.

- It's a girl named Riley. - Riley!

- She's in danger at Duke E. Dawg's.

both: Clinger.

- Oh, stage two already?

- She's not a clinger.

- Yeah, I'm sure she's in real danger this time.

- Exactly.

- Help! Oh, my God!

- Riley. - What's wrong?

- I'm hurt!

I cut myself in a spork-related incident.

- Oh, my God, that's awesome. - What?

- I'm just saying, it's a real call

- [gasps] You're right.

- Help me!

- Okay, okay, Riley, I need to apply pressure

to the wound, and...

is that ketchup?

- Uh, no.

♪ ♪

- Ketchup, the fancy kind.

- Really, Riley?

- Okay, I faked it. You got me.

Listen, while you're here, will my two favorite superheroes

record the outgoing message on my voicemail?

- I mean...

Sure. - But we're still mad at you.

- Yeah. - Oh, thank you!

- Okay, all right. [scissors snipping]

- Did you just... - Cut off a piece of our hair?

- It's for the dolls I'm making.

♪ ♪

- You guys got yourselves a clinger.

Ha!

- It all just kinda happened.

[overlapping chatter]

- Stop talking!

- ♪ Danger ♪

[vocalizing]

♪ ♪

♪ Danger! One, two, three, Force! ♪

[doorbell rings]

all: Emergency!

- That's just the doorbell.

- I know.

- Come on, Ray. You can't keep everything.

- Come on, I can't get rid of these clothes.

You gotta respect this drip.

- Well, you've got four pairs of roller skates here.

Can I at least get rid of these?

- No way.

What if I have some friends over

and we all wanna go roller skating?

- [grumbles]

Got to start by having friends.

[alarm whoops]

- Hey, look who's back.

How was your clinger?

Did you save her from actual real danger?

- Yes, she was in real danger this time.

Right, Mika? - Uh, yeah.

There was this hostage situation.

With some bad guy.

- Named?

- Bad...Guy.

- You're the worst liar!

- I'm sorry, I'm a superhero, not a super liar.

- Why can't you be both?

Like me.

- So the emergency was... both: Fake.

- And you admit you two have a...

both: Clinger.

- Ooh-- - Don't.

- Clipped your hair, huh?

Harvesting body parts, that's stage three.

This one's moving fast.

- I got Greasy Grady.

- Ah, that's my boy.

Care to tell us how?

- Well, I dropped in on him

while he was taking his grease bath.

- Almost slipped away too, 'cause, you know, grease.

- And then I tackled him and we went through a window.

- We sure did.

- Landed in the beach volleyball court.

- Beach volleyball tournament.

- A ladies' beach volleyball tournament.

The sand on the court made it a lot easier

to wrangle this guy.

That's when I slapped the cuffs on him and said,

"Grease out."

- It was a pretty k*ller line, I'll be honest.

- Thank you, Grady, that means a lot.

- Actually, my name is Kevin.

- We've been trying to take this guy down for months.

Way to go, AWOL.

Hey, you know what, why don't you take Greasy Grady down--

- Kevin.

- Why don't you take Greasy--I don't actually care

what your name is--down to the Man Dungeon

where he can't slip away.

- And, you know what, as a treat while you're down there,

why don't you go into the w*apon's room

and help yourself to as many weapons as you'd like.

- [gasps] Even the really painful ones?

- Especially the really painful ones.

- Yes! - Yeah!

- Let's go!

- You're letting Miles use the really painful weapons?

- He caught Greasy Grady. He deserves painful weapons.

- We want painful weapons, too.

- Catch a guy like Grady, maybe you'll get some.

- How are we supposed to catch anyone

when we're stuck answering calls from a clinger?

- You want to get rid of her?

- You know we do.

- Teachable moment!

And that is how a bill becomes a law.

- The president doesn't have to b*at up all the senators

to make a bill a law.

- Yeah, and you're supposed to be teaching us

how to get rid of our clinger.

- Huh?

Oh, well, it's actually quite simple.

To get rid of a clinger, you find a new host.

You know, someone else for them to cling to.

- That's so simple. - It's genius.

- Thank you, yes, I am.

- Ray, I'm gonna donate all of your Adele T-shirts.

[giggles]

- Go ahead.

Those aren't mine.

Good luck with your clinger.

I'm just gonna go talk to Schwoz about...

sports.

Schwoz!

Don't you dare throw out my sports shirts!

- So who do we pawn this chick off on?

- Well, we could do Miles, but he's my brother.

- [laughing]

Check out these sick weapons I got.

Oh, you know, the ones that you guys didn't get

because you have a clinger.

[cackles]

And now to say to you what I said to Greasy Grady.

- Don't you say it.

- Grease out, grease bags.

both: Ow!

- [cackles]

- So we pass her off on Miles?

- We pass her off on Miles. - Yeah.

[upbeat music]

- So then after the president signs it,

then it becomes a law.

Nobody, and I cannot stress this enough,

gets b*at up.

- That's cool and all, but you're supposed to be

telling us to get Riley to start clinging onto Miles.

- Okay, so, here's how it's gonna go down.

Schwoz is gonna rob Duke E. Dawg's

while Riley's there.

- Oh, fun, I like it when Schwozy is part of the plan.

- When Riley calls her two favorite superheroes

to come save her, Shoutout and Volt will fly in.

- Oh, but don't hurt Schwozy.

- No, we're gonna let you get the drop on us,

and then you're gonna pretend to hurt us.

- Then we call Miles for backup,

he teleports in, takes down Schwoz,

Riley's happy, is now his clinger,

and makes a doll out of him.

- But I can't go in there dressed as Schwoz.

Everyone will know that I'm Schwoz from Work.

- Relax, we have a way to cover that.

Mika, how are we gonna cover that?

- Schwoz is gonna be dressed

as one of Swellview's favorite criminals.

both: [gasp] Who?

[tense music]

- Well, well, well.

I am the Toddler.

And this is a robbery.

Everyone down on that dirty floor.

Now, let's get to the robber-ing.

- Huh? [squeals]

A real crime!

I can see my heroes in some real action.

Volt, Shoutout, the Toddler.

[heroic music]

- We're on it.

- Wow, that was fast.

- All right, Toddler, put your hands up.

- Come make me!

- [whispers] Okay, that's great.

Now just take us down--ahh!

Ow.

What the heck, Toddler?

- Schwoz, when'd you learn to fight like that?

- Ray's "How To Fight Like a Man" DVD.

- Oh, impressive. - Nyuh!

- Too far.

♪ ♪

- All right, put the prizes in this diaper bag.

Don't be a hero, Duke E.

- Girls, aren't you gonna do something?

- We're gonna call for...

[wheezes] Backup.

- But you're Volt and Shoutout,

the greatest superheroes in Swellview.

- We're gonna call a superhero who's even better.

[upbeat music]

- It's like, man, these mole people.

You know, they just, they wanted a fight,

so I had no choice but to go down there

and show them who's boss--

Ahh, oh, That really hurt!

[phone rings]

Ah, I never should have given you that w*apon.

- [laughs]

Yello?

Ahh! Stop it!

What's up, Mika?

No way, there's a bad guy there?

Ow!

Oh, it's the Toddler? Perfect, we're on our way.

- What's going on? - Ow!

- Ow! [laughs]

Oh, we have fun here.

- The girls need our help down at Duke E's.

We gotta roll. - Ooh, kinda busy here.

- The girls are in trouble. It's the Toddler.

- So? You can handle the Toddler.

- You can play that Holey Whock-a-Moley game.

- Somebody prepare a bunch of mole coffins.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

- Oh, no, I'm in actual danger this time.

Girls, you gotta help me. - We can't.

- For I am tied up with prize tickets,

and Volt is stuck inside the claw machine.

- Which this kid should really stop playing.

- That Toddler costume's legit. Where'd you get it?

- From the Toddler. - What?

- Look, if we really want Miles to think Schwoz is the Toddler,

it's gotta look convincing.

So I popped by his hideout while he was down for his nap,

zapped a couple g*ons and took his fit.

Zero problems.

- Well, well, well.

- There might be a problem.

♪ ♪

- Somebody here stole my clothes.

I'm guessing it's that guy right there

who's wearing my clothes.

- Wait, you're not the real Toddler?

What is going on?

[zapping]

- Oh, thank God.

Some really good superheroes are here, Riley.

- Ooh, this superhero actually has a date

with some soon-to-be-dead moles.

- You got the Toddler, right?

- Oh, actually, I could really use your help--

- Great.

Make peace with your mole gods, dirt eaters.

- Okay.

Wait.

If he's the Toddler,

then who's that guy?

Okay for real, which one of you's the real Toddler?

both: I am, jinx!

- You owe me a chocolate milk. - Oh.

- It doesn't matter. Just fight those guys.

For Riley.

[upbeat music]

both: [scream]

♪ ♪

- Wow! That's really painful.

♪ ♪

- Ow, that really hurt. - [shouts]

♪ ♪

- No! D-d-d-d-d--

♪ ♪

- I think it's working.

- Yeah, except Schwoz is getting spanked by the Toddler.

both: [shouting]

- That's the real Toddler. Schwoz is the spanker.

- Hey, quit spanking me.

♪ ♪

Snacks!

- There goes your boss.

- Ugh, we wanna go, too.

But you gotta promise not to sh**t our butts.

- Yeah. - On the way out.

- I promise.

♪ ♪

[maniacal laughter]

♪ ♪

- You promised!

- My hero!

♪ ♪

- Oh. - Oh, no!

- [slow motion] Oops.

- Riley!

- We're sorry!

- Die, you mole!

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- You saved me.

- Yeah, it was nothing.

- What's going on?

Why is Schwoz dressed like the Toddler?

- It's our fault.

- We set up a fake crime so that you would come

and save Riley.

- We thought if you saved her from danger,

she'd be your clinger.

- But then the actual Toddler showed up,

and it just completely ruined the plan.

- Did it?

Looks like she's Schwoz's clinger now.

- Aww, she's already obsessed.

[crash]

- [pants] I think we're done here.

[upbeat music]

[all speaking at once]

- It's funny because the word "wiener" is socially taboo.

- Oh, hey, look who's back.

- Hey, there he is. - How was Jamaica?

- Ugh, the worst.

I had to stay at this luxury resort

all by myself.

[all speaking at once] - How is that a punishment?

That's actually amazing. I wish I could go to Jamaica.

Instead, I have to do-- - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Hey, where's all my stuff?

- Oh, this greasy guy down in the basement said

you wanted me to let him out and all this stuff was his.

[tense music]

- Grady!

- His name is actually Kevin, sir.

- Kevin!

[upbeat music]

And remember, when you fight like a man,

there are no rules.

So feel free to throw some sand in his face

or lick your finger and stick it in his ear.

The wetter, the better.

- Zow!

That's good advice.

[upbeat music]

- ♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪

♪ The second I see trouble I know I'll be fine ♪

♪ I'm okay ♪

♪ I'm okay! ♪

♪ Danger ♪

[vocalizing]

♪ ♪

♪ Danger! One, two, three, Force! ♪