01x08 - There's a New Captain in Town

[bunniefuu]

- Previously on below deck...

- There's a fire alarm
in the engine room.

- Ready to abandon ship,
captain.

- All right, stand down.

There's no [bleep]
excuse for not getting

To your g*dd*mn stations and
getting your [bleep] on.

Things that you don't know
get people k*lled.

- I thought that aleks
did a [bleep] great job today.

- It's gonna be hard
to do my job,

Dealing with that [bleep]hole.

- Why wouldn't you just
tell me

That you'd switch rooms
with me?

Why did you have to go
to adrienne?

Did you have to make sure
she was gonna give you

A blow job every night or
something before you said yes?

- Unbelievable.
Kat is insane.

- Unbelievable.
Kat is insane.
Really, seriously.

Really, seriously.

- Come on.

- I don't kiss and tell.

- You guys are sitting there
like a couple.

Why are you guys spending
so much time together?

It's pissing me off.
- Are you getting jealous, kat?

- Are you and ben dating
or something?

- No, but maybe
I have a crush on him.

- Some people
should not drink,

And it's just disgusting.

- Take it off, buddy.

- Cj, can I see you
in the bridge for a minute?

- It's going back on
right now.

- Wear it all the time.

- Can I please go for a stroll
down on the dock?

- No.
- Why?

- Because I don't think
you're going

For a stroll
down the dock.

I think you're going out.

This is gonna be ugly.

Come back to the boat, kat.

Come back to the boat, kat.
- [Crying]

- [Crying]

- You're drunk.

- [Bleep] scumbag.

[Upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I feel like somebody
should be nice to her,

'Cause she had--i know
she had a rough night.

I'll go ask her if she
wants anything for breakfast,

You know, try to figure out.

Knock, knock. Hey.

Knock, knock. Hey.
- I got dressed,
ready to work,

- I got dressed,
ready to work,

But there's not much
going on, so--

- Yeah, well, I don't know what
the hell happened last night,

But I heard
you had a rough night.

- So I was on my way out,

And captain's there,
and he was like,

"Everyone's supposed to be
staying in tonight."

I said, "you know what?
[Bleep] that.

I'm going out."

So I went out the back door.

- He did say straight to
your face, "don't go anywhere."

- He did say straight to
your face, "don't go anywhere."
You sort of screwed up,
because it wasn't adrienne

You sort of screwed up,
because it wasn't adrienne

That told you
not to leave the boat.

It was the captain.

It's not a democracy.
- [Chuckles]

- It's a [bleep] boat.
- I know.

- And he's the g*dd*mn
communist leader.

- I'm a little worried today.

I don't know
what's gonna happen.

I don't know
what's gonna happen.
I really probably shouldn't
have my job right now,

I really probably shouldn't
have my job right now,

So I'm just gonna
take it easy,

Lay low, and kiss some ass.

Lay low, and kiss some ass.
I don't really think, like,
it's a big deal.

I don't really think, like,
it's a big deal.

It's not like
I was smoking cr*ck or,

Like, something like that.

It's like, I went out
the back door,

Just to go away
for an hour or two.

- This is the person I like
to talk and hang around.

- Right.
- Like, this is you.

This is what I'm used to,
but sometimes

This is what I'm used to,
but sometimes
you're not the same person.

You're not the same person.

- Oh, when I drink?

- Devil woman.
- Devil woman.

I drink so much that I do
become a different person...

And it makes me feel
really bad.

I want to be better
than that.

- Keep a low profile.

- I'm doing a good job
of that, right?

- Stay out of his way
for a day.

- Okay.

- I think this is the trip
where it's the dad

And the girlfriend,
and then the mom

And boyfriend--
oh, daughter.

- Wait, wait, wait.
What's this for?

- This is our next trip.

- And who is the vegan?

- These two.

- Two vegans?

- [Laughs]
- oh, god.

- They also both drink
that green juice stuff.

- Oh, I bet they do.
I bet they do.

I'm nervous for these vegan,
lactose-free,

Sugar-free, gluten-intolerant
guests coming aboard.

- They like vegan tiramisu.

- They should go
to vegan jail.

There should be, like,
a vegan jail for them.

These guys are vegans,
which means no animal products--

No dairy, no meats, no fish,
even no honey,

Because the bees are actually
working for that.

Yeah, it's gonna be
an absolute nightmare.

They should be paying extra
for this.

[Laughs]

- Anchor ready?

Aleks to the floor deck,
please.


Let's make the drop.

- All honor crew,

Guests will be arriving
in ten minutes.

- Kat?
- What?

- I've got to get something
off my chest, babe,

Right now,
if that's okay with you.

When I've got something
on my mind, i--

I-i can't let it go.

I have to deal with something,
if there's an issue.

When you drink,
you turn into

A trailer park, demonic,

White trash refugee,

And I need to get that
off my chest.

The ball is in your court.

- That was really nice of you
to say about me.

- You're welcome.
Anytime.

- Did he really say that?

I mean, that hurt my feelings
so bad.

[Dishes clanking]

- Just so you know,
if he didn't have

- Just so you know,
if he didn't have
to cook breakfast
right now,

To cook breakfast
right now,

I would have [bleep]
strangled him for doing that.

- That's, like,
something awful

To say about somebody,
you know?

Especially 'cause it's, like,
me and him always hang out.

So it's, like,
he likes my company,

But then he wants to call me
demonic white trash.

"Oh, now the ball's
in your court."

Why is it in my court,

'Cause you said something
horrible?

- That was just rude
and unnecessary

And terrible timing,
by the way.

I just wanted to make sure
you were okay.

- I-i'm fine. I'm just like,
"ugh," you know?

- I-i'm fine. I'm just like,
"ugh," you know?
- I could just tell
you were like--

- I could just tell
you were like--

Kat and I may have had
some differences.

That doesn't stop me
from being human

And sympathizing with someone
when they're being att*cked.

- Thanks, friend.
- Sorry about that.

- It's okay.

Ben gets more drunk
than anyone, even myself.

He just holds it together
a little bit better.

He's the biggest hypocrite
for saying that about me.

- Well, what do you want?

- Welcome aboard.

- Davana.
- Adrienne.

- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

- I was ready to leave
on tuesday or wednesday,

But these two wouldn't go.

- No, you're mean.

We could've been here
for two days already.

We could've been here
for two days already.
- So there's no cheers?

- So there's no cheers?

- So there's no cheers?
- Yeah, a little cheers.

- Yeah, a little cheers.

A little welcome aboard.
- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

Thanks for making it happen
also.

- What do you call it
when someone's vegan,

But they'll still
wear animals?

Stupid?

- You know the bmw
she had before?

- Yeah, her new one.

- Yeah, but a smaller version
of that 'cause--ahem!

- I got in a lot
of accidents.

I just didn't know
the dimensions of the car.

It was difficult.

We have a motto
in this family.

It's "you get what you need,
not what you want."

- But joe gets what he wants.

- Yeah, exactly.
- [Laughs]

- We're just--
let's go, come on.

- I'm gonna ask everyone
to take their shoes off.

We don't wear shoes inside.

It doesn't make sense to me

Why this family
would vacation together.

- I have a lot of work to do.

- Oh, yeah.
- There you go.

- Golfing, golfing,
and more golfing.

- It's the husband
and his new girlfriend,

Who's a complete bimbo,
his ex-wife

And her new boyfriend,
who's a meathead...

So, joe, this is your room.

- Okay.
- This is the master.

- It's beautiful.
- I can live with this.

- Dad, they have your favorite
of the day.

- And their daughter.

Find another place
to vacation.

Find another place
to vacation.
Don't do it together.

Don't do it together.

- I'm on vacation.

- You're on vacation
all the time.

- [Laughs]

- Um, lee, so I heard

You wanted me
to do the water line?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, uh...

There is, uh, basically nothing
on this boat

That I won't do for you.

I'll climb into bilges.

I'll clean 'em out.

I'll get sweaty and dirty
in the engine room, but--

Yeah, there's
a big "but" coming.

Yeah, there's
a big "but" coming.
- There's always
a "but" coming.

- There's always
a "but" coming.

- Five years ago, I cut my foot
in the caribbean,

And I got a blood infection

That turned into
endocarditis,

And I spent about a month
and a half in the hospital.

I was told by the doctors

That there's no amount
of penicillin

That would bring me back
this time.

So this stale water
that's not moving,

I can't go stirring up
a bunch of bacteria

On the bottom of that
with all the cuts

And things on my hand.

That stuff is so thick,

It's just gonna be
swirling around me.

- Interesting.

Cj's just a douche bag.

I thought it was just
total bull[bleep],

Which I think that's what cj
is comprised mostly of.

If you don't want to do it,
I don't care.

I think your reason
for not doing it is lame,

'Cause it didn't
stop you from diving

'Cause it didn't
stop you from diving
in this water
on numerous occasions.

In this water
on numerous occasions.

- Yeah, I dove in the water.

- Yeah, I dove in the water.
I didn't scrub bacteria
off a 163-foot boat.

I didn't scrub bacteria
off a 163-foot boat.

- I don't give a [bleep]
if you do it or not,

To be honest with you.

- Hey, you've got--

You've got two day workers.
- End--end of discussion.

There's nothing
I want to say about it.

- Scrubbing the bottom
of the boat is not

The worst job in the world.

But the fact
that you would have

Your second engineer do it

Over three deckhands,

Just says to me
that I'm being singled out.

There's no way in hell
I'm risking my health

To scrub his boat.

Did I do something wrong
that you would give me

The most demeaning job
on the boat right now?

- Wait a minute.
I've done it.

- I like getting in the water--
- I've done it and have done it.

So if you're too good for it,
tough [bleep].

- I'm not too good for it.
- Stop.

- Fine, I'll do it.
- End of conversation.

Just put a [bleep] lid
on it.

I am up to here with you.

- That's why I asked.
Have I done something wrong?

- From day one,
you've been yourself.

That's reason enough.
- [Laughs]

- So as far as I'm concerned,
just put a sock in it.

I really don't care
to discuss it with you.

Do you understand that?

- Loud and clear, sir.
- Good.

And that's the name
of that tune.

- I'm gonna tell nash
that I'm doing something else,

And then we're gonna go have

A couple beers and
jump off the [bleep] boat.

A couple beers and
jump off the [bleep] boat.
- Cheers, darling.

- Cheers, darling.

- Oh, [bleep].
- What?

- I'm not gonna get
in the water

With cuts all over
my fingers and feet

And scrub
the whole [bleep] boat.

He doesn't have any [bleep]
respect for me anyway,

So he can suck it.

- So what did he say?
Wait, don't walk away.

- He said, "that's a horrible
[bleep] excuse."

Oh, my life
is a horrible excuse?

Who the hell is captain lee
to not believe me

When I say I have
this health issue?

I'm [bleep]--
I'm done with him.

[Bleep].

[Door slams]

- Poor cj, you know?

He works his ass off,
he really does.

Like, he's the first one up
in the morning

And the last one
to go to sleep.

And he is work, work, work,

Constantly running around,
helping people.

He's really talented,
and he catches so much [bleep].

I feel bad for him.

- I can't wait to do
some real cooking--




- I don't think kat
wants to hear about it.

- I don't think kat
wants to hear about it.

- We're not talking, kat?

- Yeah, we're not talking.
- Why is that?

- So ben calls me demonic,
and quite--

Quite frankly, if I'm demonic,
then he's satan.

Quite frankly, if I'm demonic,
then he's satan.
What are you giving me
that look for?

What are you giving me
that look for?

- Get over it.

I'm gonna try and
stand my ground on this one.

- What?

- What did I do?
- Why don't--

You should know
what you did.

If you didn't
do anything wrong,

Then I guess
I wouldn't be mad, right?

- I don't know.
I just thought

You were being weird.

You were being weird.
- Weird, huh?
- Okay.

- Weird, huh?
- Okay.

I didn't become a shrink
for a reason.

I'm not here to psychoanalyze

I'm not here to psychoanalyze
or diagnose kat's behavior.

Or diagnose kat's behavior.

Or diagnose kat's behavior.
- Davana is falling
off the cart.

- Davana is falling
off the cart.

- 'Cause I'm having
scrambled eggs.

- I would just like you
to, like,

Focus in on your daughter
for a second.

When she steps off
of the reservation,

She's putting herself
in harm's way.

- I don't think eggs
are horrible for you.

And I think it's very hard
just to go vegan.

- When you think, that's
when you make a mistake.

The bottom line is

That eggs are the worst thing
you can eat.

- These charter guests
that we have

Are completely
bat[bleep] crazy.

- Over easy or over medium?

- Over medium.

- I had eggs yesterday.

- I don't think eggs are--

- Mom, speak up!

- I'll be right back
for the other three.

- Think about what eggs are.

I just want you to try--

I just want you to try--
- dad, I don't want
to talk about this anymore!

- Dad, I don't want
to talk about this anymore!

You're really upsetting me.
- I know that.

- I don't want to talk
about it anymore!

You're really aggravating me!

- But you're not--
- I've already eaten it!

I've eaten everything
that you wanted me to eat!

I wanted eggs, that's it.
- Okay, stop yelling.

- Yeah, but why don't--
- no, he's so annoying!

Like, I've heard this
for the last two hours!

- Then why not just eat vegan
for the next--

- 'Cause I wanted eggs!
I don't think

It's a [bleep] big deal!

- You definitely should eat

A lot of fruits
and vegetables.

- I don't want to talk
about it anymore.

You're just really
annoying me.

- What conversation
would you like?

- Not me.
Talk about your fat self.

[Laughter]

You're the fattest I've seen you
since you turned vegan.

- This chick has just got
to be a complete spoiled bitch.

- Yikes, dealing with
you guys is like

Dealing with, like,
the [bleep] third reich.

- You realize you put
an emergency phone call to us?

- Dad, shut up!

- I am not expecting
a big tip from these guys.

I mean, despite
our five-star service,

I mean, despite
our five-star service,
they are miserable.

They are miserable.

- Joe, in one hour, you're gonna
be on the golf course, huh?

- Well, then I have
to get ready.

- Joe's gonna go golfing,
he said.

- Okay.
- I'll go with you.

- That girl davana, man,

She is so rude
to her mother.

She is so rude
to her mother.
- She's a bitch.
- What'd she say?

- She's a bitch.
- What'd she say?

- Oh, my god.

She just is constantly
talking back to her.

It's absolutely ridiculous.
No respect.

It's absolutely ridiculous.
No respect.
No respect these days
with these kids.

No respect these days
with these kids.

- Aleks?
- Yeah.

- I just want to let you know,
you've been

Doing a good job
the last few days.

- Thank you.
- Keep it up.

I appreciate it.
- Thank you, I appreciate it.

- All right.

- Did I just hear a compliment
comes out of lee's mouth?

That's incredible.

I think I might call the
guinness book of world records.

- What a pretty day.
No breeze, 5 knots of wind.

- I love it.

- That's the plan, I guess.

I'll be out getting
nine holes.

It's the least I could do.

- I appreciate it.

- And never let it be said
that I never did

The least I could do.

- It's surprising, you know,
lee's putting me

In charge of the boat.

Maybe this golfing thing
with the clients will let him,

You know, make his way

Out to retirement
or something.

- You want to--you gonna be
a moving target?

One more reason
to get a boat.

There's the captain.

- Yeah.
- I had to call you ten times.

- Yeah.
- I had to call you ten times.
But hey, it's better late
than never.

But hey, it's better late
than never.

All right, well, let's go.

- Thank you.

- Are you ready?

Have fun.

[Indistinct chatter]

So at the moment,
the guests are off the boat.

- All of 'em?
- Yes.

They all just left.

So we're in good shape
in all the rooms?

- Yeah, they're all done
and done nicely.

- So what are we doing,
and what do I tell adrienne?

- So what are we doing,
and what do I tell adrienne?
- Nothing.
It's all worked out.

- Nothing.
It's all worked out.

- I just disappear?

- No, I already have it
set up

That you're gonna go help, um,
nash with excel,

And he needs it done.
- Right.

- And then I'm gonna
tell nash

That I'm doing
something else.

And then we're gonna go
have a couple beers

And jump
off the [bleep] boat,

Or we're both gonna
lose our minds.

No, it's not really okay
to drink on charter.

It's never okay
to drink on charter.

It's never okay
to drink on charter.
But, I mean, the captain
shows me no respect,

But, I mean, the captain
shows me no respect,

So I'm not gonna
show him respect.

And I'm gonna do whatever
the [bleep] I want.

It's like when you're
in high school,

And you tell your parents,
"I'm staying at susan's."

And then susan says,
"I'm staying at sammy's."

Exactly the same thing.

[Both laugh]

[Indistinct chatter]

- Captain lee's not here.

None of the guests
are here.

I have worked harder

Than I have ever
in my entire life.

I need a [bleep] vacation,

And it's gonna involve cj
off the bow of the boat.

I'm gonna tell adrienne
that you need me.

- Mm-hmm.
- All right?

And then--

- I'll leave so you can
talk about me again.

Go ahead.

- I wasn't talking about you,
actually.

- That's what you've
been doing all day.

- You got it.
- What?

- No, you got it.
- Yeah?

Thank god nash is the man

Thank god nash is the man
and agrees to help me escape
for a few minutes,

And agrees to help me escape
for a few minutes,

Because if I don't get
some time off from adrienne,

I'm gonna lose it.

- All right, we're off.
- All right.

- You guys good?

- Adrienne, adrienne, sam.

- Go for adrienne.

Be in the crew mess
in a minute.

What do you need?

- I just wanted to check in
with you and see, like,

What the deal is for
the rest of the day.

What the deal is for
the rest of the day.
Since it's only 1:00
and next dinner service

Since it's only 1:00
and next dinner service

Isn't until 7:30,
if I could help nash

For a little while and/or

Possibly take
a little power nap.

- That's up to you and kat
to work out.

- Okay.

- Okay.
- So, I mean, if she's fine
and the rooms are done--

- So, I mean, if she's fine
and the rooms are done--

- Shocking.

I already talked to adrienne,
and she said to just

Work it out with you that,
you know,

I'm just gonna go help nash

For a little bit
with his excel thing.

- Okay.
- And then, um,

Maybe, like, lay down
for a little bit.

- Okay.

- I'll see you
in a couple hours.

- All right.

- Yes, dude,
like, [bleep] yes.

[Upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I'm gonna drown.
- I'm not gonna drown you.

- [Laughs]

- Oh, [bleep].
- What?

- Here. [Bleep].

Take the beers.
Take the beers.

Hold the beers
with one hand,

And then grab me
with the other hand.

I don't know.
Just stay here for a second.

- Something's poking me.
[Laughs]

- It's a buckle of mine.
- Oh, it's a buckle.

Is that what it is?
[Laughs]

- You guys having fun?

- We are.
Are you okay?

- I'm fine.
- Are we okay?

- No, you're drinking
on charter.

- There was just, like,
rage in his eyes.

Aleks is pissed.

I talked to both
the head of my department

And my fellow stew and--

- And it's okay
to drink on charter?

- It's not okay to drink
on charter, but I'm not--

Clearly gonna not
gonna deny it.

- Whenever you guys
are done with those beers,

- Whenever you guys
are done with those beers,
why don't you guys
come back onboard?

Why don't you guys
come back onboard?

- Yes, sir.

- Lee's off the boat.
He's out golfing.

They think
they can slack off.

That doesn't fly
on my boat,

So get the [bleep]
out of the water

And get back to work.

- He can [bleep] suck it.

- He can [bleep] suck it.
I don't give a [bleep]
what he thinks.

I don't give a [bleep]
what he thinks.

- Do you think
he's gonna tell lee?

- I don't care.
I got one charter left.

I'm not letting him
get the upper hand.

- Aleks, you ready?
- Yeah, you coming?

- Yep.

- I should really not
associate with you, huh?

- [Laughs]

- Ben!
- Yes?

- Let's go!

- There is a hydroponic farm

On the island of anguilla.

So they want me to go there
with adrienne

And pick out some amazing
vegetables for this evening.

- Here, you got this line?

- I want to take ben
and adrienne by cj and sam

- I want to take ben
and adrienne by cj and sam
so they can see

So they can see

What their fellow team members
were doing in the water.

- I'm gonna swim
to the swim platform.

- You guys all right?
- You guys done?

- You need lemonade
or anything?

- Cj, sam, go back
on the boat.

- [Chuckles] what the hell
was that all about?

- Dude, I don't know.

I should have known
that something was amiss.

But of course, her and cj,

They're a cute little couple,

Thinks it's a great idea
to go hang

Off the bow of the boat
and drink beers

In the middle of a charter.

When the captain learns
about this, they are done.

- Holy [bleep].
Holy [bleep].

[Bleep] hell.

- Something's poking me.
[Laughs]

- It's a buckle of mine.

- Oh, it's a buckle.
Is that what it is?

- You guys all right?
- You guys done?

- You need lemonade
or anything?

- Cj, sam, go back
on the boat.

What the [bleep]
are you doing?

The number one rule
is you don't drink on charter.

Get the [bleep]
out of the water

And get back to work.

They think they can hang out
on the bow

And drink beers on charter.

- Oh, were they drinking?
- Yeah.

- What the [bleep]?

- I just want to do something
that's gonna

Piss off aleks
when he gets back.

- Well, I think you've already
thoroughly taken care of that.

- Yeah, I know,
but he keeps telling me,

"Get back on the boat,

Get back on the boat,
get back on the boat."

- Take care.
- We'll give you a shout

When we're done.

- Aleks isn't the captain.

I could care less
what he says.

You're a child still,
as far as I'm concerned,

So you can suck it.

I'm not getting back on the boat
until I feel like it.

- [Laughs]

- This is pretty cool-looking.
- This is amazing.

I'm going
to the hydroponic farm

Because really fresh produce

Is just so difficult
in the caribbean.

The gooseberries
taste like gooseberries.

[Laughs]

I really like sourcing
ingredients and actually

Directly using them,
you know, hours later

To form a menu, you know?

These are edible flowers,
are they?

If I'm dead in half an hour,
we'll know, right?

- Yeah.
- I'll tell you what.

There's nothing like
a fresh pepper.

- Are you gonna be in there
for a minute, aleks?

- About a minute, yeah.

- Can I talk to you
when you come out?

- Of course.

- I'm feeling uneasy
and know

That there
will be repercussions.

I like aleks, and I don't want
to piss him off.

Like, if anyone else
had caught us,

Like, if anyone else
had caught us,
I would've probably just
told 'em

I would've probably just
told 'em

To [bleep] off,
but I respect aleks.

Hey, love.
- Hello.

So what's up?

- Um, well,
I wanted to apologize,

First and foremost.

I guess I shouldn't apologize
for having a beer,

'Cause I think I would've
done it either way,

But maybe just for not

Letting you know
that we were going overboard.

Letting you know
that we were going overboard.
- First off, I mean, what--
- I mean, I'm not gonna

- First off, I mean, what--
- I mean, I'm not gonna

Give you an excuse
or a bull[bleep] answer,

Because, well, "a,"
I don't have one,

And even if I did,

It wouldn't make
a difference,

So I don't think this would be,
like, such an issue

If there weren't
a beer involved.

- Adrienne's been coming to me
left and right, you know,

Trying to get advice, like,

"What do I do, you know,
with sam?

"What do I do, you know,
with sam?
She's so arrogant, so stubborn,
blah, blah, blah."

She's so arrogant, so stubborn,
blah, blah, blah."

And I finally see that.

Like, she just
doesn't like authority.

Look, sam, when lee's
off the boat, I'm in charge.

And you guys didn't ask me.
Cj didn't ask me.

And I understand he's upset,
but you guys

Aren't following the rules.

Obviously, any other boat,

As soon as the charter's done,
they'd tip you

As soon as the charter's done,
they'd tip you
and be like, "all right,
pack your bags."

And be like, "all right,
pack your bags."

But I don't know
how I'm gonna handle it yet.

This is a unique situation.

This is a unique situation.
We have one charter left,
so I don't want to fire them.

We have one charter left,
so I don't want to fire them.

Which they should be fired,
but I wanna think

Of a way to teach them
a lesson, you know?

I'm just thinking about
how I'm gonna handle this.

- Can we just clear this up,
guys?

I'm just gonna say my part.

I'm just gonna say I'm sorry,
all right?

That I hurt your feelings.

I didn't mean to,
all right?

I didn't directly
hurt your feelings.

I didn't mean to ever
hurt your feelings.

I don't want to hurt
anyone's feelings.

I really don't.
And--

And it's cutting me up quite
a lot the fact that I did.

And I'm sorry, all right?
- Okay.

- I don't think you're trailer
park at all, all right?

I just think you are sometimes
when you drink.

All right, that's it.
- Okay.

- I really don't think
it's a personal insult,

Unless she plans
on being drunk

For the rest of her life.

- Okay, I'm sorry.
- Let's just get over this.

We've got a couple days left.
- Very gentlemanly.

- And it's all good.

- And it's all good.
And I don't want
any mixed feelings.

And I don't want
any mixed feelings.

I want to rock it out.

- I think ben's apology
is really sincere.

- I think ben's apology
is really sincere.
But deep down inside,
I know that the only way

But deep down inside,
I know that the only way

To change their mind about,
you know,

My drinking is to--
to prove

That that's not who I am

And that I can change
and I will change.

- Oh, we were just wondering
what the lunch was.

- I know the first
is lentil soup.

- Okay.

- I'll pass on lentil soup.

It's too hot.
- Little hot for the soup.

- I would have gazpacho
right now.

And I want
a really good salad

With lots of vegetables
and a good dressing.

- And you know what?
Caprese salad.

- And you know what?
Caprese salad.
- That's not vegan.

- That's not vegan.

- I'll be right back
with lunch.

Both: thank you.

- Wait two minutes,
then go out there casually

And say,
"you're in luck, guys.

"The soup
is actually chilled.

"But if anyone wants it warm,

Ben will gladly warm it up
for you." Okay?

- Okay.
- That's what we do.

So that'll buy us five minutes,
all right?

Got more ice?
- Got you some more ice bags.

- Good. Nice stuff.

All right, love,
we're are all good. Take that.

Let's get this bloody soup
in here now.

All right, good man,
good man.

The vegans do not want
a hot soup,

So I'm in the galley busy
chilling this soup.

I've gotta turn a hot soup
into a cold soup

In the next five minutes.

- I just spoke
with the chef.

He said that the--
you guys are in luck.

He said that the--
you guys are in luck.
That it's actually
a chilled lentil soup,

That it's actually
a chilled lentil soup,

So if anybody wants it
heated up...

So if anybody wants it
heated up...
- Wow.
Oh, that's great.

- Wow.
Oh, that's great.

No, no, no,
let's keep it cool.

- We can do that.
Okay.

- When we scrape this out
into a bowl,

We might even
get one ourselves, darling.

- [Laughs]

- We've got 'em hook,
line, and sinker.

Okay, what we have to do
is just come up

With really,
really creative ideas

To screw with them as much
as they screw with us.

And by the way, nice
leather handbag, mr. Vegan.

[Laughter]

- This is a red lentil...

- Red? But it's green.
- And curry.

Yes, it is,
because of the curry.

- Wow.
- Do you like it?

- Curry.
- It's good.

- I think it's very good.

- I think that's the key

Of great vegan food.

- Flavor?
- Having a lot of flavor.

- Mm-hmm.

- I want to jet ski and swim.

Yeah, I'm getting sweaty
and hot.

- Davana wants someone
to jet ski with.

Bye. See ya.

- You know, I really
am starting to feel

That cj is just such
an amazing sweetheart.

That cj is just such
an amazing sweetheart.
I would really like
to get to know him

I would really like
to get to know him

Because I think
he's an absolute sweetheart.

- He is super, super sweet.

- Is he a good kisser?
- No.

- Oh, he's not?

'Cause I was gonna kiss him.

- You can try it out.
Maybe it'll be better for you.

When you go to kiss someone,

You lean in halfway, right?

And the other person
is supposed to meet you

The other 50% of the way.

With cj, he leans in


And I don't do any leaning,

And then I just have
no choice.

And then I just have
no choice.
And then he's all up
in my grill

And then he's all up
in my grill

And fricking teeth clinked,
you know what I mean?

Like, it was just terrible.

He goes too fast.

- Didn't you tell him
to slow down?

- No. How do you say that?
Like--

- I would go,
"buddy, slow down!"

[Laughter]

- Where's the fire?

- All right, so if everyone
would like to sit,

I could get you
some champagne,

I could get you
some champagne,
whatever you'd like,
to start.

Whatever you'd like,
to start.

- All right,
who's sitting where?

- Look at the pretty
place coverings.

- Thank you, sweetheart.

I know.
It's really pretty.

- Holy [bleep].
Holy [bleep].

When I hit that pan
with the oil,

And that [bleep] went up,

It went up about


And I was just like,
"holy [bleep]."

- Fire in the galley.

- Open that door
and keep it open.

Thank you.

All right, go out with this.

[Bleep] hell.

Pot $20,
yacht $18 million.

[Splash]

See you later.

It's all good.

It's nothing.

- Eddie, eddie, if you get
a fire alarm in the galley,

We are all clear
in the galley.

Maybe you should be doing
more than carrying

The first aid kit out
to every single alarm we have.

- Yeah, I'm pretty good
with fires.

- Cj and sam decided
to go swimming off the bow.

They had a beer
in their hand.

- [Grunts]

- There's so many
bloody ingredients here,

It's just ridiculous.

- Adrienne, adrienne, kat.

We are ready for service.

We are ready for service.
- So sauteed bean sprouts,
a medley of mushrooms,

- So sauteed bean sprouts,
a medley of mushrooms,

Black truffle, and cashews
on coconut yellow curry.

- If I say something,
will you promise not to get mad?

- Mm-hmm.

- I don't know if they
will eat truffles.

- Why not?

- 'Cause they're found by pigs.

- Yeah, let's--
let's not mention that.

That's actually a [bleep]
good point you just bring up.

That's actually a [bleep]
good point you just bring up.
- I'm just saying.
- No, no, no.

- I'm just saying.
- No, no, no.

Just so everyone
is clear on this one,

I found these truffles myself.

I found these truffles myself.
I did have to k*ll six pigs
in the process.

I did have to k*ll six pigs
in the process.

[Laughter]

- To b*at the pigs
to the truffles.

- Yeah, yeah.
[Laughs]

- What you have
in front of you is

A yellow curry broth base

With a mushroom medley
bean sprout

And black truffle saute,

And a red sesame tofu
on top of that.

- Red sesame.
- Thank you.

- It's very good.
- Very good.

- It's very good.

- I find this very tasty.

- Benny boy.
- How you doing, aleks?

- Can I have dave replace cj
for a few minutes or no?

- Do you really want to have
this conversation private?

'Cause, like, anything
I'm gonna say to you

Is just my opinion.

I mean, I would say it
to anybody else.

I mean, I would say it
to anybody else.
- Cj tried to avoid
confrontation all day.

- Cj tried to avoid
confrontation all day.

He kept trying
to get pushed away,

Like he was
completely innocent.

I'm like, don't be
a [bleep] child.

- Okay, just--
I'm sorry to mediate this.

You guys are gonna talk about it
on your own, okay?

- Okay.
- I'll meet you on the bow.

I want to have this talk
with cj.

I eventually want
to take over this boat

And run it my way,
so I feel like

I have to deal with this.

He needs to learn his lesson.

- [Exhales]

This is suddenly slowly
becoming the chitchat spot.

We can jump right into me having
a beer with sam over today.

We can jump right into me having
a beer with sam over today.
I talked to my superior nash.

I talked to my superior nash.

He said I had
a couple hours off

'Cause he had paperwork
to do.

We went swimming.
Yeah, we had a beer

In the middle of the day
that we shouldn't have.

But other than that,
I didn't do anything wrong.

- What's the number one rule?

Did you forget that,
that we don't drink on charter?

- Yeah, but I figure--
I mean, I just--

You know, it's one beer
in the middle of the day.

I don't really have a problem
with, you know,

Being able to have
just one or two,

And then calling it a day.

All the guests were gone.

I really didn't think
it was that big of a deal.

- Safety is my utmost concern.

The number one rule is
you don't drink on charter.

I don't care
what the situation is.

You have to be prepared
for anything that can happen,

You have to be prepared
for anything that can happen,
whether it's a fire
or you're flooding,

Whether it's a fire
or you're flooding,

Rough weather,
you never know.

We can't get drunk.

You have to think for yourself
and be like,

"Hey, you know what?
We're on charter.

I can't drink."

It's just a simple rule, bro.

It's just a simple rule, bro.
I mean, I'm just looking out
for you guys--listen.

I mean, I'm just looking out
for you guys--listen.

- I know you're
looking out for me.

And I know exactly
what I did wrong.

And I know exactly
what I did wrong.
And I weigh the consequences
of what I do before I do them.

And I weigh the consequences
of what I do before I do them.

- So what are the consequences?

- The consequence is
I could be fired tomorrow.

But sometimes you need a break
in the middle of charter.

All I can think of is,
"is he really

Gonna rat me out
to the captain?"

Gonna rat me out
to the captain?"
Obviously, we just--
you know, we're not gonna

Obviously, we just--
you know, we're not gonna

See eye to eye
on certain things, you know?

- We'll never see eye to eye

Because you don't listen
to anyone.

You're always like, "I'm right,
I'm right, I'm right."

Take some fault, dude.

Take some fault, dude.
He's never been
on a boat this big.

He's never been
on a boat this big.

He doesn't know the rules.

It's not a fricking party, bro.

It's not a fricking party, bro.
It's not a sailboat.
This is a white boat.

It's not a sailboat.
This is a white boat.

This is a yacht.

"I take full responsibility."

- What do you want me to take
responsibility for, aleks?

- What do you want me to take
responsibility for, aleks?
- I want you
to take responsibility

- I want you
to take responsibility

For your actions, bro.
- Which ones?

Drinking the beer today?
I already said that.

That shouldn't have been done.
It's against the rules.

I knew it was,
and I did it anyway.

- I don't know what to do,
because I'm in a dilemma

Where I haven't
told lee yet about that.

- [Scoffs]

He's so authoritative
all the time,

With the haircut,
the attitude,

The bone structure.

I really think
that he has daddy issues.

- You just gotta think,
man, like,

Poor dave worked his [bleep]
ass off today

From 5:00 a.m. Till
he just went down, but--

- He just went down.
And where am i?

- I understand that.
- Still [bleep] awake.

So he didn't take
a two-hour break and I did.

- Let me [bleep] talk.
- Go ahead.

I'm waiting for you to actually
say something of, like--

- It just looks bad.

- You're the only one
that has an issue.

- You're the only one
that has an issue.
You're the one
that wants to be captain.

You're the one
that wants to be captain.

Give me trash-pulling duty

Or something if you want
to make an example out of me.

I mean, if you need to do

Something like that,
that's fine.

- He's just babbering
and babbering and babbering

And going off.

All I wanted him to say was,
"I'm sorry, boss.

"I was wrong.
I messed up.

I'll never do it again."

I'll never do it again."
He's not listening to me.

He's not listening to me.

- I really just, like,
want to not feel like

I need to drink
all the time.

- Do you feel like
you're drinking more now

Than you do normally?

- No, I've been drinking
since I got into yachting.

I mean, I enjoy drinking.

It's just
that I take it too far.

It's just
that I take it too far.
- Right.
- And when--

- Right.
- And when--

When you do something
that interferes

With the other people
around you,

Then it's actually be--
a problem.

- Kat's drinking has almost

Cost her her job
more than once.

She's gotten by by the skin
of her teeth a few times.

And she needs to make a change
for herself.

And I believe
that she really wants to.

You work hard
and you definitely play hard,

And I don't see anything
wrong with that.

But my only advice is,
you know,

For yourself,
know your own limits.

I used to be
a huge party boy.

When I lived in d.c.,

I was out every single night.
- Really?

- I was partying
every single night.

And it got to the point
where I was just like,

"This isn't healthy.
I don't like who I am."

And it just--
it didn't feel good.

- That's not who I thought
I was ever gonna be.

You know, I never thought
that I would be,

Like, struggling
with my partying.

When I drink,
I drink too much.

Now I have this reputation
onboard as a partier.

And it actually really
hasn't gotten out of control

Until I got into boating.

I have a hard time
calling it quits

Because I just want the party
to go on.

Look at how fortunate I am,
how fortunate we are.

- Right.
- And half the time,

I don't even remember the day.

- Take a step back.
Stop--

Maybe stop drinking
altogether.

And next time
we're out partying,

Be the girl that's like,
"I'm gonna have one."

I'll be there with you.

If you don't want to drink,
I won't drink with you.

I just live every day
to its fullest,

But that doesn't mean
party your face off every night.

- [Laughs]
that's what living life

To my fullest
has been up until--

- There's so much more
that you could be doing.

- Yeah.

And dave is the only one
who's by my side.

It's a really nice feeling.

I can't wait to be the best man
at your wedding.

[Both laugh]

- Port of plaisance,
port of plaisance,

I just wanted you
to be advised,

We're gonna come in, make
a starboard side two approach.

Take up on the bow line,
aleks.

All right, lock it in.

Okay, let's get all the crew
on the aft deck, please.

- Can someone
find my sunglasses?

- Some of us
have to be ready.

- Are these--
- all crew, all crew,

Please be on the aft deck
in five minutes.

- Can I take this bag, ma'am?
- Yes, please.

- Thanks, everybody.

- Thank you so much.
- I appreciate it.

- Pleasure having you onboard.

- This is for you.
- Thank you, sir.

- Appreciate it.
Thank you.

- Lee, most of all,
thank you so much.

- And you. Thanks a lot.
- See you again, ben.

- Bye, take care.

- Bye, thank you again.

- Got through another one, ben.

- Oh, you guys are eating vegan
for the rest of the year.

[Laughs]

[Laughs]
- aleks, aleks, lee.

- Aleks, aleks, lee.

- Yeah, go ahead, lee.

- To the bridge, please.

You got a second?

- Roger that.
One minute.

Be right there.

So, what's going on?

So, what's going on?
- Here's the tip money
that we got.

- Here's the tip money
that we got.

One of the fun spots
of getting to the end

Of the charter is getting
to hand out the tip money.

That's kind of fun.

You've been doing
a pretty good job lately,

You've been doing
a pretty good job lately,
so I figured
I'd let you do it.

So I figured
I'd let you do it.

- Well, thanks.
- Unless you don't want to.

- I mean, I'll do it,
but, um,

I want to talk to you
about something.

I want to talk to you
about something.
- Why is there always
a "but"?

- Why is there always
a "but"?

- So, yesterday,
when you went, um,

Off the boat for a few hours...
- Mm-hmm.

- Cj and sam decided
to go swimming off the bow,

Which would be fine
on a day off,

But not when your crew
is busting ass.

And then when I come to--

I see all the commotion
on the bow.

You know, they're hanging off
the bow line.

They had a beer
in their hand.

- [Grunts]

- And I confronted them like,
"you're drinking on charter.

What the [bleep]
are you doing?"

So that being said, you know,
it was one beer.

We have one charter left,
and it doesn't

Make sense
to get rid of them.

But the tip money--

I was thinking
of docking their pay.

- That's a slippery slope
you're going down,

'Cause you know my philosophy
on tips.

If you don't deserve the tip,

Then you get
your full share,

But that's the last one
you get.

- The captain has
a zero-tolerance policy.

Termination would be
the consequence

For drinking on the job.

- I'd prefer you to handle it
the way I normally do.

- I just think that, you know,
since we have a charter

Tomorrow morning,
and obviously, we--

Tomorrow morning,
and obviously, we--
I mean, as much as they're
not pulling their weight,

I mean, as much as they're
not pulling their weight,

We still need the manpower.

The season's dying down.

We can't get crew over here in,
you know, 12 hours.

- So you kind of have
that held-hostage feeling?

- Kind of, yeah.

- Well, how much
you want to dock 'em?

- We'll just dock 'em


- This once.
- Of course.

If they're smart,
they'll suck it up,

You know, and swallow
their pride and take it

And be grateful
for having their job.

- It's a crapshoot.

You still
want to roll the dice?

- Gotta teach 'em a lesson.

- It's your deal.
I'll back you up on it.

Now it's time to implement,
okay?

- There's no other choice,
you know?

Cool.

- I need all crew
down in the crew mess

In two minutes, please.

All crew at the crew mess
in two minutes.

- Roger.

- Getting a little knot
in your stomach?

- No, not at all.
- You should.

Brace yourself
for the [bleep] storm.

[Chuckles]

- You wanna scoot over?

- You wanna scoot over?
- He's not coming
to this meeting.

- He's not coming
to this meeting.

- He's not coming
to this meeting.
- Huh?

- Huh?

- No.

I'm gonna do it for him.

- Maybe there's nothing
to divvy out.

- So you guys want to know
how much money we made?

Any guesses?

- Yeah, 5 grand, 4 grand.

- Yeah, 5 grand, 4 grand.
- 5 Grand.
- 5 Grand.

- 5 Grand.
- 5 Grand.

- 5 Grand.
- 5 Grand.
- Really?

- Really?

[Bleep] this, man.

- Wow.

- Eddie, nash,

Adrienne, fred.

- Something's not adding up.

We should be getting
more than this.

- And they're all raving
about the charter.

- Yeah, and everyone says
every single good thing,

So something
is not adding up.

That's a huge slap
in the face, it really is.

I was expecting somewhere
around, like, uh,

$1,200 To $1,300 range.

This is bull[bleep].

- You missed me, by the way.

- And me.
- Yeah, I'm gonna get to that.

So you guys know lee's stance

On drinking on charter.

Obviously both of you were.
- [Chuckles]

Obviously both of you were.
- [Chuckles]
- is there something funny?

- Is there something funny?

- No.

- No.
- So, having spoke to lee

- So, having spoke to lee

And telling him
that we have one charter left,

Basically we have
two options.

You can take the $500 and walk,

Or you can take $300,
put the rest in the kitty,

And stay
for this last charter.

- Next time on the season finale
of below deck...

- I have the itinerary
for this trip.

There are some female couples.

- Wow!
- Whoo-hoo!

- I also have a provision sheet
for the dog.

[Dog barks]

[Dog barks]
- you need to use the command,
"go poo poo."

- You need to use the command,
"go poo poo."

[Dog barks]

- Oh, short shorts, huh?

- Nice short shorts,
adrienne.

She's really working
for that money now.

[All cheering]

[All cheering]
- what happened to that rule
where you're not

- What happened to that rule
where you're not

Supposed to fraternize
with the guests?

- Whoo!

- Out of nowhere, adrienne's
come out of the closet.

- Hi.
[Laughter]

- She's dancing like

I danced in sixth grade
at astro skate.

[Laughter]

- I got moves
you haven't even seen, girl.

Nobody's leaving the boat
tonight, you guys.

- Just so you know,
you can't tell me what to do.

I'm actually a higher rank
than you, so--

- I'm tired
of being the bad guy.

- I don't even want to look
at your face, adrienne.

- I want her out of here.

- I want her out of here.
I don't know
if you get this, sam,

I don't know
if you get this, sam,

But I'm still your boss.

You still have
to report to me.

You still have to tell me
what's going on.

- Are you not listening?

The captain wants
to fire you guys.

- I need an hour to decide
what I want to do here, people.

- I've been offered
to hop ship and go...

- Do it.
- To newport tomorrow or today.

- Today.
- Today. Right now.

- Do it.

- This group of people
are just insane.

I'm so ready for it
to be over.

- All these yachties
in these big, white boats

- All these yachties
in these big, white boats
need to take a page
from my book.

Need to take a page
from my book.

- He might actually do it.

- Are you getting a load
of this?

There's a big part of me
that wants to take him

And go, "come on,"
talk some sense into him.

I can't believe
this is happening.

- I'm tired of everybody
[bleep] complaining.

We got a g*dd*mn job to do!

Let's [bleep] get it done!

I don't give a [bleep]
if I have $200 extra!

I'm gonna get a job done!