01x11 - Chip Switch

[bunniefuu]

[ Music plays in elevator ]

Dooley! What are you
doing in my elevator?!

I'm enjoying the music. Today is
"love songs from the nineties."

Use the stairs!

This is exactly how healthy
kids become unhealthy adults.

Really? Are we
having this conversation?

For your information,
I'm a speed Walker.

Perhaps you've seen me
at the mission creek mall

giving the shoppers
a little eye candy?

Listen up, space-fillers!

This is emergency
preparedness week.

An emergency drill
can happen at any time.

So when the alarm sounds,

you must evacuate the building
in an orderly fashion...

Like cattle, if cattle had acne...
And braces...

And a future filling up
my gas t*nk. [Laughs]

Oh, man! I wish I had
Bree's super-speed!

Because you do not want to be stuck
walking behind cows in an emergency,

trust me on that.

You would trade
your super-strength

for Bree's super-speed?

Man, if I had your strength,

I'd just run out of the building
juggling those cows.

Yeah, and if I had
your super-intelligence,

I'd have walked away from this
conversation thirty seconds ago.

Hey, you know what
would be awesome?

If you guys took out your bionic
chips and switched your abilities.

I call your super-smarts!

I call your super-strength!

I call good looks and charisma.
Oh, too late. Already got 'em.

Narrator: The world's first
bionic superhumans...

They're stronger than us,
faster, smarter.

The next generation
of the human race is...

Living in my basement?!

♪♪

[ All screaming ]

If you guys are gonna switch
your chips before before school,

don't you think you should
run this by Davenport first?

Thewell, yeah, ips.

But what if something glitches
out and you end up with

Adam's gigantic head on
chase's tiny, doll-like body?

We don't have to ask "daddy" for
permission on every single thing we do.

Yeah. I mean, do you think
I ask Davenport

which shoe goes on which foot?

No! I label them
"left" and "not left."

Okay, Bree. Attach the chip
extractors to the capsules.

I'll program the computer
for chip removal.

And Adam, you...

Jus-just get in your capsule.

Whoo!

Now, Leo, I have the most
important job of all for you.

Now, once we get inside,

I'm going to need you...

To push this
green button.

Yeah. And then
I'll push the button

that makes you stop
talking to me like I'm five.

[ Beep ]

[ Whooshing, beeping ]

Oh, no!
My head's coming off!

Kidding.

[ Whooshing, powering down ]

Do you think it worked?

I don't know.
Hey, Adam, let's arm wrestle.

Ahh!

Yes!

Who's got the tiny,
doll-like body now?

Ioh, Leo.

This is gonna be
a piece of cake...

Aaah!

Hey, hurry up, you guys.
You're gonna be late for school.

Oh. Hey, big d. Um...

Just a simple question.

What would happen

if three totally
random bionic kids

decided to
switch their chips?

I'm not asking for them, it's for
three of my othe bionic friends.

Wait... you have three other bionic
friends? How could you not tell us?

We could get, like,
a mini-Van and car pool.

You guys didn't switch
your chips, did you?

No.

Oh, good, 'cause that
would be a crazy idea.

See, I calibrated their bionics
to match their biology.

Adam has height,
so I paired that with strength,

and Bree is lean,
so that increases her speed,

and chase, of course, nobody questions
chase's impossible wealth of knowledge

because he's, you know, nerdy.

Yep.

I got all sorts of smarts
up in here.

Heh. Like numbers
and mathy stuff.

The point is,

switching their chips
could cause

all kinds of
unpredictable problems,

so you should never do it...
Ever.

I have spoken!

[Scoffs] Mr. Davenport is making
such a big deal about nothing.

I know. I mean, we already switched
our chips and nothing bad happened.

We're fine.
Race you to school!

[ Cohh! ]

[ Laughing ]

Oh...

Oh, I almost
forgot to mention...

Before you try
lifting something heavy,

always stretch first.

Okay.

[ Chase grunts ]

Okay, maybe you should stretch
before you stretch.

[ Loud clank ]

Ew! What is that?

Oh, man, I got some
guacamole on my shirt.

Adam, you forgot
to change your shirt.

[Laughs] I didn't
go home to change,

I just needed some chips
for my guac.

Morning, frank.

You know, I don't take the time
to get to know my students.

Who is frank?

What makes frank tick?

What are frank's dreams?

Fire drill!
[ Aget up, frank! S ]

Go! Your dreams just
became a nightmare!

[ Alarm bell continues ]

Oh, my ears!

Owww!!!

She's not used to
my bionic hearing.

I've conditioned myself
to the bell. She hasn't.

[ Laughs ]

Remember when I
was that stupid?

[ Laughs ]

Remember when I was stupid?

Owww!!!

Come on, slowpokes,
pretend it's the mall!

Swing those arms!
Show those shoppers!

There's a food court
at the finish line!

Ohh! Perry!

Not so fast.

Dooley, what are
you thinking?

In an emergency this elevator
is the worst place you could be!

Well, it is
now that you're here.

Leo:
We're going up.

Did you push a button?

No! You must have bumped it when you
shifted your center of gravy. Gravity.

Remain calm. I'll
super-speed us out of here.

Please keep your hands and legs
inside at all times.

Whoa. Nope, chase.

You have to be at least
this tall to ride the ride.

[ Both laughing ]

You get it? 'Cause you're
embarrassingly small.

Oh! Wait. Speaking of
embarrassingly small, where's Leo?

Bree, try to use my super-hearing
to detect his voice.

All I can hear is
that stupid alarm!

Adam, use your heat vision
to take out that alarm.

Or you use my heat vision
to take out the alarm.

Somebody just do
something and something!

[ Alarm bell continues ]

[ Zapping,
[ Electrical crackling ]

[ Laaaaah! Nk ]

[ Crackling ]

Nice goin'.

Well, you try aiming a thousand-degree
laser with your eyeball.

Oh, I will, if I can use
your ears to aim it.

Get off me!

Huh! Power's still on.
Must be a fuse.

The one day I don't
wear my tool belt.

Hey, I have a paper clip.

Well, that will certainly
come in handy

if we need to hold
two papers together!

[ Grunting loudly ]

Ohh!

Great. We're stuck
between floors.

Don't look at me like that.

In high school I was
an all-state squatter.

Hey, listen up,
generation epic fail.

It's your fearless yet loveable
leader principal Perry.

I am stuck in the elevator.

Repeat: I am stuck
in the elevator. Again:

I am stuck in the elevator!!!

Serves her right
for not taking the stairs.

Hey, I'm in here too!

Repeat: I am in here too!
Again:

I am in here too!!!

Oh, no.
That's Leo!

You just trapped Leo in the
elevator with principal Perry.

If any superheroes are listening,
I could sure use some help!

What?! He knows superheroes?

Oh, it's probably the other
three bionic kids.

We are the bionic kids.

Us. Me, you, and him.

Us!

Look out. I-I can fix this.

I just need someone
to show me how.

Without my bionics, this just looks
like a bunch of pretty-colored wires!

I want my chip back.
I want my chip back!!!

[ Zapping ]

[ Sizzling ]

Okay.

I have to stay calm
so I don't glitch again,

but just for the record
I would like to say:

Not a fan of the heat vision.

I smell something burning.
Do you think there's a fire?!

Well, if there is,

the fire is either
gonna melt the cables

and we'll plummet
three stories,

or the fire will melt us and
we'll plummet three stories!

Is it too late
to take the stairs?

[ Crashaaaaah! Mbling ]

Ahh, Mr. Davenport was right.

We never should have
switched our chips.

Without my bionic intelligence,
I'm just a dumb bag of meat.

No offense, Adam.

Aw, none taken.

Man, without my super-strength,
I just feel like a puny,

weak, doll-bodied chump
with an ugly shirt.

No offense, chase.

Look, I'm calculating a risk
probability analysis of the situation.

You know, measuring the statistical
likelihood of Leo's survival in the elevator

versus the real calculated risks
of a precision rescue attempt.

So based on my calculations, the
answer to saving Leo is obvious.

Yup, we can't do it.
Sorry, buddy!

Oh! Let'no! Adam.A movie!

We just have to rush home
and switch our chips back.

That's a great idea!

Leo, we have to
run home real quick.

Don't go anywhere.

Really?
Where am I gonna go?!

Don't come over here.

Hey! There's a hatch on the roof.
Maybe we can climb out.

Great idea!
Lock your hands!

I'll use 'em
as a stepladder!

Yeah, how about
you lock your hands?

Okay?

[ Grunting, shrieking ]

Ow!!! Hey...

That's not a handhold!

Climb faster!

I can't! It's like climbing
a marshmallow mountain!

You're a nail-biter?

Well, yeah, sometimes
when I get nervous.

Me too!

It helps me feel...

Both:
More in control.

The thumb's my favorite. It's
the filet mignon of fingers.

Good to know,
principal Perry.

Call me Terry.

Call me a cab.

[ Whooshing ]

[ Powering down ]

Great.
We're back to normal.

Grab on and I'll super-speed us
back to school.

Hi!

Why aren't you guys
at school?

And what did I tell you
about climbing each other?

Uh...[nervous laughter]...

Adam goes on the bottom
'cause he's the sturdiest?

Uh, we forgot our homework.

There it is.

Heh heh heh.

Chase: Yeah...

Now we can...
Hand in our homework

for our robotics
assignment.

You have a robotics class
in high school,

and your homework

is a hand that I designed.

Just take us
back to school.

Uh-huh.

[ Loud creaking ]

Just so you know,
if it comes down to you or me,

I've got some bad news for ya.

Well, don't worry. I know Adam, Bree
and chase'll get us out of here.

They always got my back.

Must be nice to have friends
who care about you so much.

When I was your age
I got picked on all the time.

"Isn't Terry a boy's name?
[Nasty laughter]"

"No!!!"

I'm just glad they never found
out my middle name is "cherry."

[Stifled laughter]
Wait. So your full name...

Is Terry cherry Perry?

I know, right?

When I say it people think
I'm ordering ice cream.

Well, if it makes you feel any
better, at my last school,

the mean kids didn't call me Leo
dooley, they called me Leo "doody."

[ Snorting laughter ]

Hey, hey,
ease up there, cherry.

Sorry.

I became a principal so I could make
sure kids like me never get picked on.

Now here I am using my power
to pick on kids!

[Crying] I'm no better
than those bullies were!

Sorry, dooley. I didn't mean
for you to see me like this.

Call me Leo.

Don't be fresh.

[ Sobbing ]

Okay, you have your smart chip
back, professor. Do your thing.

Okay. If I cross a red wire
with a pink wire,

I'll end up with a red wire
crossed with a pink wire.

Wait a second. This is still all
just a bunch of pretty colors to me!

Where are my super-smarts?

Since traction elevators
operate on a pulley system,

we just have to calculate the
weight of the cars plus passengers,

multiply that by
the height we need to move it,

and that will determine
the energy needed.

Also, a group of twelve or
more cows is called a "flink."

Oh! I think my brain
just threw up!

Wait a second. If he has
your super-intelligence,

does that mean that
you have my speed?

Aaah! I run like
a normal person!

[ Whimpering ]

We must have switched
the chips again!

I don't know what to do!

I don't know what to do!

I know what to do.

[Gasps]
I know what to do!

The elevator's stuck between
the first and second floor.

There are two remaining
hoist cables left holding it up.

Bree, if your reach through the
vent and grab one of them,

you can use your super-strength to
pull the car up to the second floor.

Got it.

Man, it is so peculiar watching
Bree have super-strength.

Not as peculiar as you
using the word "peculiar."

[ Grunting ]

[ Loud creaking ]

Great! Pull it another five feet

and it should raise the elevator
to the second floor landing.

Come on, Bree,
use your strength!

I got it, I got it.

[ Loud snapping ]

I gotcha, baby! I gotcha!

I-I had it.

[ Loud crash ]

I don't know
my own super-strength.

Great idea, Adam.

Now there's...

[Gasps] One cable
holding the elevator!

Ooh! Chase can
count to one!

Bravo!

Now I know why you guys are
always making fun of me so much.

I'm stupid!

It's times like these
I think:

Who's gonna feel
all my cats?

[Gasps]

I hope they
don't eat mother.

[Gasps louder]

I hope she doesn't
eat them!

Hey, dooley.

I'm sorry for being
so hard on you.

You're not
such a bad kid.

Thanks.

And you...

Are a tolerable middle-aged
authority figure.

That's the nicest thing
anyone's ever said to me.

Thanks, Leo.

"Doody."
ha ha ha ha!

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Mmm!

Okay, there's only
one cable left.

Don't pull it too okay.

And don't pull it
too okay.

Actually,
you might want to...

You may want to
stop talking!

What if this doesn't work?

The traction cable will sever,

causing the elevator car
to vertically free-fall

until it crashes
into the basement,

crushing it
and anyone inside.

But you will
be able to do it!

I don't know how to
control your bionics.

I'll teach you. The key to
pulling something heavy

is remembering to keep
a strong center of gravity.

That way, you're lifting with your
entire body instead of any one part.

It also helps to
keep a blank mind.

Oh, man, I miss that.

Okay...
Strong center of gravity...

Mind is blank.

Here I go.

[ Creaking, metallic whining ]

Yes! It's working!

[ Elevator bell dings ]

We didyes!

Both:
We made it!

[Laughing]

Ughh.

I thought we bonded.

I was desperate!
Don't get all weird, doody!

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Uhhh! Uhh!

Dooley! What did I tell you
about being in an elevator

in an emergency?!

That if you get stuck
gotta go. Eat your mom.

Oh, guys!

Thank you for
saving my life!

I owe you guys.

Actually, we're the ones
that got you stuck in there.

Oh. Well then, you'll be
hearing from my lawyers.

Hey, guys, how was school?
How'd the chip switch go?

How'd you know?

First of all, Adam is reading a
book instead of gnawing on it...

And you left the extractors out.

Look, Mr. Davenport,
we know you're upset,

but you were right.

Without our chips, we're,
like, totally useless...

Like normal people.

Look, I'm glad you guys
learned your lesson,

but I'm very
disappointed in you.

Now, how big of a bill
can I expect from the school?

None. We made it all
look like an accident.

Ha! Yes! Way to go!

Ow! She has the strength
right now, right?

Yeah.

♪♪