03x30 - Miley Says Goodbye? Part 2

[bunniefuu]

♪ Whoo! ♪

♪ Here we go, everybody ♪

♪ Come on ♪

♪ You get the limo out front ♪
♪ Ooh-ah-ooh ♪

♪ Hottest styles
Every shoe, every color ♪

♪ Yeah, when you're famous
It can be kind of fun ♪

♪ It's really you
But no one ever discovers ♪

♪ Who would've thought
That a girl like me ♪

♪ Would double
As a superstar? ♪

♪ Whoo! ♪

♪ You get the best
Of both worlds ♪

♪ Chill it out, take it slow
Then you rock out the show ♪

♪ You get the best
Of both worlds ♪

♪ Mix it all together ♪

♪ And you know that it's
The best of both worlds ♪

[ laughing ]

♪ Ooh, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

Is it because you're worried
about Blue Jeans?

Yeah,
but it's not just that.

I mean, I brought
Blue Jeans out here

because I thought
he was missing me.

But last night, I realized it
was really me missing Tennessee.

Let me guess:

Your talking horse
told you this?

Dad, I am not gonna make
this important of a decision

because a talking horse
told me to.

I argued with him
until he turned into me,

and as you and I both know,
it's useless to argue with me.

I hear that.

Dad, look,

it may seem like
I'm not thinking straight.

And maybe I'm not,
but it's just

I can't shake this feeling
of wanting to go back home.

Something that you're missing
back home in Tennessee?

So you're not mad?

No, of course not.

I mean, this is
a really important decision,

and we don't need to rush it.

We need to take a step back

and give this the consideration
that it deserves.

We're going back
to Tennessee.

And leave Lilly?
How can you be so cold?

We'll take her with us.

Dad, Lilly's not gonna
wanna come with us.

California is her home.

And besides,
Oliver and her dad are here.

Think a little.

Okay, I am thinking,

and what I'm thinking is,
my dad always told me

when a female
is having a problem

and tries to drag you
into the middle of it,

the best thing you can do is
smile, nod and compliment her.

Dad, it's not that simple.

I mean, ugh, sure,
Oliver will be okay,

but, I mean, what about Lilly?
She just moved in.

How can I abandon
my best friend like this?

Oh, my goodness.
You look lovely this morning.

It's not gonna work.

Did you do something different
to your hair?

Oh, good,
you're up.

Oh, good, you're here.
Listen,

I gotta go to the store.

Compliment her
and stay close to the exit.

Good luck.

[ door closes ]

Hey. Nice pajamas.

Okay, where's Lilly?
She still sleeping?

Yep. Poor kid.

Sailing away
on the ship of dreams.

Little does
she know that, uh,

I'm about to wake her up
and crush that ship

into the brutal rocks
of reality.

Uh, okay.
[ door opens ]

Say her manicure
looks nice.

Your manicure looks nice.
Stop that.

Okay, fine.
Your tips are chipped,

and your pajamas,
a little bit frumpy.

Can we talk about me
for a minute?

The most exciting thing
happened last night.

So I was over at Jackson's,

and there's this band
that lives upstairs, and...

[ sighs ]

All right.

All right, that's just gonna
have to work for now.

[ knocking on door ]

Oh, no.

Dude, your door's busted.

Dude, I know.

Hey, look, um,

we're rehearsing upstairs,

and all this banging
going on down here

is kind of
harshing the vibe.

You're Trent Stone
from Tepid Funk.

[ gasping ]:
What? Wait.

Who cares?
Y-You're Oliver Oken

from America's Top Talent.
Yeah.

You're the best thing
that happened to music

since the air guitar, dude.

[ imitating guitar ]

You know what would be
the coolest thing ever?

Huh?

If you opened for us.

Oh, well...

Please?

Okay.
Yay! Yay! Yay!

Thank you.

Really?

Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay?

Okay, it didn't happen
exactly like that,

but they did ask me to open
for them on their world tour.

World tour?
Yeah.

How much of the world
are we talking about?

Six months.

Six months? You're gonna
leave Lilly for six months?

I know. That's why I'm so happy
she has you to lean on.

You know, think about it.
I mean, her mom's moved,

her dad's an hour away.

Without me,
you're all she's got.

You know, you're it.

You're the center
of her universe.

All right?
All the roads lead back to...

I'm moving back
to Tennessee.

Backstabbing best friends
say what?

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

Man, this stinks.

I know.
How are we gonna tell her

that both of us
are leaving?

Don't even
think about it.

[ grunts ]

You know, you knew
without looking,

and it's that kind of
sensitivity that makes you

the perfect person
to tell Lilly.

Tell me what?

Uh...
that it's a beautiful morning,

and we're taking you out
for a we-love-Lilly day.

Because we love Lilly.
Yeah.

And we want you
to remember that.

Forever.

Aw, come here.
Come here.

Okay. Ah.
Lilly, mm.

Okay. What--? What's going on?
Okay.

Why does something
have to be going on?

Can't two people
who care about you

just give you a day full
of wonderful memories?

Memories that will carry you
through the hard times

that life inevitably
throws at you?

Would you both stop
smiling at me like that?

'Cause it's kind of
creeping me out.

Absolutely.
No problem.

What did I just say?

Sorry.
Sorry. My bad.

So let's get packing.
Cracking.

Uh...
Let's get cracking, ha, ha.

Because packing
would be stupid.

♪ Oh ♪

TRENT:
One, two, three, four.

[ band playing rock music ]

Rico!

[ glass shatters ]

[ thud ]

[ whimpers ]

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa ♪

Now, I don't know
about you,

but this is a day
I will never forget.

Never, ever, ever.

Ever.

Yeah, me too,
but, I mean,

you didn't have to buy me
a whole new outfit.

I-I-I think
I'm gonna take it back.

Oh, please,
do not be ridonkulous.

I mean,
you look adorable.

And besides,
you already sweat in it, so...

You're right, I did.

Thank you,
overactive sweat glands.

[ high-pitched voice ]:
You're welcome, Lilly.

Oh, you're so cute.
I'm gonna miss that when

I'm in somewhere
that you're not,

and we can't
see each other,

heh, because we're not...

[ laughing nervously ]

Well, somebody forgot
their pictures in the car.

Honestly, I mean,
I told you guys I--

I'd be okay with the little ones
from the machine.

Oh, you silly Lilly.

Everybody loses those.

These jumbo puppies
are here to stay.

So cute, ha, ha.

Okay. You keep saying
everything's okay,

and I go along with it
because, you know,

I was-- I was hoping for
a matching purse, but, uh--

Honestly, saying you love me
every five minutes,

and wearing
the friendship bracelet

I gave you three years ago.

What gives?

All right, fine.

There's no easy way
to say this.

[ sighs ]

I'm moving back to Tennessee.

And I'm going on tour
with Tepid Funk.

Leaving you is the hardest thing
that I've ever had to do,

but there's just something
pulling me back to Tennessee.

This is an unbelievable
opportunity for me.

[ sighs ]

Ugh, wow.

Do you want a tissue?

Do you wanna hit something?

Maybe Oliver?

Assume the position.

[ whimpers ]

Go ahead, Lilly.

Lilly?

No, I-I understand.

[ yells ]

[ whimpers ]

Wait, you do?

Yeah, Oliver, you're right.
I mean,

you can't pass up
something like this,

and I wouldn't
want you to.

I'm so proud of you.

And, Miley,
I totally get it.

If-- If your heart is telling
you to go back to Tennessee,

then you have to.

So you're not mad at me?

No, of course not.

I mean, I'm gonna miss both
of you guys like crazy, but...

it'll be okay.

Lilly,
you are amazing.

I was so worried
that you'd freak out,

thinking I was one of those guys
who goes on the road

promising not to cheat,
but then, you know,

caves after
the first cute girl who, uh--

Well, let's be honest,
just after the first cute girl.

And I was terrified

that you'd think I was gonna
go back to Tennessee,

hang out with my old friends,

get a new phone,
forget to put your number in it,

and then you try to call me,
all lonely and sad,

and all you hear
is a voice saying,

"Oh, I'm sorry,

"but this number
has been disconnected

because she now has
cooler friends."

[ chuckles ]

Lilly?

Lillypop,
are you okay?

[ angrily ]:
I was until you guys brought up

that stuff you thought
I'd worry about

that I wasn't worried about,
but now I am.

Oh, no.
Lilly, please don't cry.

Okay, you know what, Lilly?
I won't go.

I'll give up
my dreams for you.

Oh, what, so you can stay
and grow to hate me?

[ whimpers ]:
Oh, yeah,
that's a much better choice.

Okay, fine,
then I'll stay.

So you're so bitter
you can't even look at me

without seeing
the soul-sucking leech

who kept you from
following your heart?

Why does saying goodbye
have to hurt so much?

I know.
[ sighs ]

Why can't we be
more like them?

[ all sobbing ]

LILLY:
I think I need that tissue now.

[ Lilly blows nose ]

[ sobbing ]

How much time do we have left?
Well,

we just have to wait for my dad
to find a ranch in Tennessee.

[ whimpering ]:
But...

let's not think about that now.
Okay.

Whoo!
Great, you're still here.

I just found
the perfect ranch.

You're gonna love it.

Thanks a lot, Dad.
Yeah.

I'm so happy for you.

Bon voyage.

[ whimpers ]

[ sniffing and crying ]

Pfft!

Girls.

They are so emotional.

[ whimpering ]:
Don't you look at me.

[ mellow theme playing ]

[ upbeat rock theme playing ]

[ drilling ]

Good cabinet.

Stay.

Stay.

All right.

Jackson Stewart, handyman.

Stop mocking me!

[ knocking ]

Miley. Hey.

Come on in, y-y-you.

Welcome to paradise,
population: moi.

[ chuckles ]

You'll have to
forgive the mess.

Uh, I'm just doing
a little remodeling

because I just
love this place so much.

You like my table?

It's a table
and a place to stand

if I ever have
a regular-size date, heh,

which I will,
because my apartment is awesome.

Jackson, I have a problem,
and I need to talk to somebody.

Because, like,

the 6 billion people

that you'd come to
before me

have just sort of
mysteriously vanished?

Oh, wait. No.

See about a half a dozen of them
out there right now.

Oh! There's a guy talking
to pigeons across the street.

Seems like he really enjoys
a nice conversation.

Jackson, I'm serious.

I told Dad that
I wanna move back to Tennessee,

and before I could even blink,
he found a place.

W-Wait, um,
we're moving back home?

Well, Dad and I are,

but, I mean, you seem to like
this apartment so much,

I wouldn't expect you to come.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
I mean, yes, yes, I...

I-I-I love this apartment.
I love it.

Uh, but-- But not more than
the family unit, you know?

I would insist
that Dad pay off the lease

so, that way, the family unit
could remain unified and united

and, you know...in a unit.

You hate it here, don't you?

[ whimpers ]:
It's a nightmare.

It's...

Look, i-if--

If we move back to Tennessee,
I won't have to admit to Dad

that my first decision
as an adult was, uh,

[ couch spring clangs ]

[ whimpers ]

a complete disaster.

Oh, no...

How did this become
such a mess?

I don't know.

An incompetent furniture maker

with no pride
in his workmanship.

Jackson,
I was talking about my life.

I mean, part of me wants
to go back to Tennessee, and...

part of me...loves it here.

And how can I leave Lilly?

[ sighs ]

What do I do?

I love you,
but I don't have your answers.

Wait, I-I think I might
know something that'll help.

I'm not talking
to the pigeon guy.

No, I'm talking about
Blue Jeans.

You should go for a ride. That--

That always seems like
when you do your best thinking.

Yeah, you're right. Wow.

Such simple words,
yet they taste like vomit.

Uh, "Thank you, Jackson,"
would be enough.

Thank you, Jackson.

Not as bad this time,
but still gonna need a mint.

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Whoa, ooh ♪

Right now I wish
you really could talk.

And maybe then
you could tell me what to do.

[ whinnies ]

Miley, you're smart,
you're funny,

and now you have
my lucky bracelet.

Hey,
I have a lucky bracelet

just like that.

I loaned it
to my best friend yesterday.

Of course, mine says
"Lilly" on the back.

Just like that.

♪ Everything I do ♪

♪ Is making me more confused ♪

Ta-da.

♪ Oh, it used to be easy ♪

[ inaudible dialogue ]

♪ All I had to be was me ♪

♪ Now I'm mixed up ♪

♪ Everywhere I go ♪

♪ Everywhere I go ♪

♪ Is somewhere
That I don't know ♪

♪ Oh,
I hope that I'm dreaming ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm sick
of this feeling ♪

♪ I'm mixed up ♪

♪ Somebody help me ♪

♪ Mixed up ♪

♪ Somebody help me ♪

[ snorts ]

There you are.

I've been looking
all over for you.

Sorry.

Up here doing a little thinking?

Oh, yeah.

I mean,
I know I need more Tennessee

back in my life, it just...

Something--

Something doesn't feel right
about leaving my life here.

Especially Lilly.

Yeah. I mean,
how can going back to Tennessee

be the right decision

if it makes me and the people
that I love so unhappy?

Daddy, I don't think
I can do it.

I know that, darling.

I could tell by the way
you were acting this morning.

Then why'd you go off
and buy a ranch in Tennessee?

I didn't.
What?

I could tell you needed
to be in Tennessee

and California both,

so I found a way
we could meet in the middle.

You bought a ranch
in Oklahoma?

No. Actually, it's a little
closer than that.

Twenty acres.
Cute little barn.

Kind of like a Crowley Corners
down by the sea.

You did not.

See that place
right over there?

You bought that place?

It's not Tennessee,
but it's pretty daggone close.

It's better.

It's perfect.

There's room for everybody.

Lilly, Blue Jeans,

and even Jackson.

I'll fill you in
on that later.

Thank you so much, Daddy.

I love you, Mile.

I love you too.

[ soft rock theme playing ]

Wow.

Seeing it all empty
is kind of sad.

I know.

You know, I'm just glad
you and Miley

are still gonna be
living together.

It'll be a lot easier
being on tour

knowing that you have her.

You better call me
every day.

I'm gonna call you
twice a day.

[ sighs ]

Yeah, but can you make sure

it's not too early
and not too late?

All right, fine,
call whenever,

but I wanna talk to you too.

Yeah, but seriously,

I'm much nicer
between 10 and 10.

[ car honking ]

Dad, moving van's ready.
Let's go.

Yeah, what is he
doing up there?

I don't know. He's, uh,

packing up some valuables
that he wants to hand carry.

Ready to go.

A blow dryer and some brushes?

I'll have you know
this is a limited-edition

Jet Stream GT
with ionic diffuser.

The most powerful hair dryer
known to man.

Can I--?
You wanna keep that hand, son?

Yes, sir.

[ whimpering ]:
And, uh, goodbye, stairs.

Goodbye spot
where I kissed Andrea Strand.

Goodbye spot
where Andrea Strand Tasered me.

Goodbye spot where I
stepped over your twitching body

to run and go get my camera.
[ Lilly and Oliver chuckling ]

Come on, Jackson,
you got a great apartment now,

and you're only
ten miles up the road.

Yeah. Yeah, I do.

It's furnished. It's--

It's right near the beach.

I've never been so happy.

[ sobs ]

See?

Well, this is great.
We're all gonna be happy now.

Oliver's hitting the road,

you up there
in your little apartment,

and me, Miley and Lilly
out there at the new ranch

with the heated swimming pool
and two hot tubs,

so whichever side of the house
you're on,

you're only steps away

from 72 pulsating jets
of pure paradise.

Seventy-two?

That's not even counting
the ones that go up and down

and up and down.

[ whimpering ]

Dad,

how long are you gonna
t*rture him till you tell him

that you got him
out of his lease

and he's coming with us?

What?
Come on, Mile.

I had two more minutes
of great material lined up.

Thank you,
thank you, thank you.

You're welcome,
son.

All right, everybody,
let's get a move on, now.

We got a new
ranch to fix up.

Or as I like to say,

a ranch that needs
some dressing.

Get it?
Ranch dressing.

Whoo! Good thing Robby Ray
packed up the humor. Let's go.

Come on, Miley,
it's time to say hello

to our new home.

And goodbye
to the old one.

[ melancholic theme playing ]

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

Here's your keys.
Thank you.

[ band playing rock music ]
Heh!

Yeah. Uh, good luck
finding another sucker

to rent this place.

Hey, hey. A coat of paint,
some new cabinets,

a little wood glue,

and another sucker
will be knocking down the door.

Hopefully
after he signs the lease.

[ cracking ]

Oh!
[ band stops playing ]

We gotta work this bit
into the show.

One, two,
three, four.

[ band playing rock music ]