02x20 - School's Out

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Faking It"...

Felix!

I made it home.

You planned this whole party just to avoid having sex with me?

The one person I've ever asked you to stay away from.

You can never trust a Booker.

Hey, you know how you're always wondering if you're a bad person?

You are.

The real you is so fantastic.

You're the best friend ever.

So what did it mean?

Honestly, I have no [bleep] clue.

Shane, you're supposed to help me figure these things out.

Well, I guess it's possible that Karma kissed you because she has feelings, but on the other hand, she was a drunk girl at a party, and kissing you for attention is kind of what she's known for.

But it was different this time.

There was no one around when she kissed me.

She didn't get any attention.

Until the lights came on and everybody saw.

Okay, there's no use trying to analyze it.

Let's just wait and see what Karma says when she wakes up.

[lively music]

[groans]

Sorry, I couldn't wait.

Hey, Karma. How are you feeling?

Karma: My head.

It's like my brain's trying to escape my skull through my eyeballs.

Babe, that's called a hangover.

Okay, but how are you feeling about...

What you did?

Oh, my God.

I let the soccer team lick salt off my stomach.

both: And then?

And then, oh, I danced on a table.

both: Uh-huh, and?

And my nipples were showing.

both: After that.

After that...

After that, it's blank.

[both sigh]

[hip hop music]

♪
♪

Farrah and Daddy could be home any second.

Scrub faster!

I wouldn't be scrubbing carpet barf if you hadn't invited Tommy over to have sex.

Hope it was worth it.

That is none of your business.

Unless you want to discuss your drunken pool shenanigans with Karma.

[door opens]

Girls, we're home.

Hey.

There they are.

Hey.

How was your trip?

Well, it was exactly what we needed.

I feel like this weekend, for the first time, we truly connected.

And we made a decision that we're both really happy with.

both: We're getting a divorce.

What?

We just rushed into marriage way too fast.

We're sorry to have dragged you two into this.

Hey, look at the bright side. Now we can move back to Dallas, just like you always wanted, sug-plum.

You're just gonna take her back to Dallas?

She has a whole life here.

Can't she stay through graduation?

Of course.

Lauren.

No matter what happens between your dad and me, you will always be the daughter I never had.

[scoffs]

You're welcome to stay here with us if that's what you want.

[lively music]

♪
♪

[door closes]

Good morning.

Hey, thanks.

And thanks again for letting me couch crash.

Oh, please, you had nowhere else to go, and I am a friend to the homeless.

Well, at least the ones that look like you.

[chuckles]

So, Karma and Amy swapped spit in the pool.

The plot thickens. What do you think it meant?

Don't know, don't care.

Really?

No, I'm too upset about my fight with Shane.

He called me a [bleep] Booker.

Wow.

How dare he... call you by your last name.

A Booker is a rich, self-involved [bleep] who uses money to get what they want.

Uh-oh, I think I'm a Booker.

No, you're a good person.

Eh, sometimes.

You're way better at that than me.

It's probably 'cause you're only half-Booker.

I bet your real dad is out there somewhere doing God's work as a Rabbi or a teacher or a plastic surgeon.

Or sitting on the mountains of cash that my family must have paid him to disappear.

Look, I appreciate the chat, but I'm late for school.

Have a good day.

Yeah, you too.

I can't believe you're even considering this.

So I'm supposed to just abandon my dad to live with my cheating ex-stepmom?

Yes. Think about what you'd be leaving behind.

Like my life here is so great.

I fell in love with a guy who turned out to be a narc.

I'm only class president because I'm... different.

So different, in fact, that Tommy was too scared to have sex with me.

Tommy's an idiot.

Everyone at Hester accepts you.

Lauren, do you really think you're gonna find that back in Dallas?

Back in Dallas, nobody knows.

[somber music]

♪
♪

[bell ringing]

Remember, I will have eyes on you at all times.

Miss Raudenfeld.

I hope that party of yours was worth it.

Felix, what happened to you?

Uh, well, I kind of had too much to drink at your party and wrecked my dad's car.

Oh, Felix.

I'm so glad you're okay.

God, no wonder he was pissed.

Yeah, he'll calm down, though, as soon as I'm safely back in rehab.

Back?

Hi, my name's Felix, and I am an alcoholic.

Okay, now you say, "Hi, Felix."

But you're 16.

What can I say? I'm an overachiever.

Plus my mom was one too, so basically last night was my dad's worst nightmare come true.

You got drunk at a party at my house.

I'm so sorry.

Hey, I'm the one who should be apologizing.

I tend to spill my guts when I'm wasted.

It's okay.

People do crazy things when they're drunk.

Well, in my experience, drunk people say and do the things they wish they could do when they're sober.

They do?

Yeah.

Like, I meant it when I said I really like you.

I like you, too.

[poignant music]

So, will I be seeing you back at Hester next year?

Who knows?

Right now, I'm just taking it one day at a time.

♪
♪

Bye, Amy.

Bye.

Here you go.

[playful music]

Oh, Liam.

Look, I just wanted to apologize about the other night.

I'll admit, I haven't been myself since our breakup, but I crossed a line at the party.

Many, many lines.

I know I snapped at you.

Is... is there something else?

Oh, I don't know. How about that kiss?

Oh, my God, I kissed you?

Karma...

I'm so sorry.

I was really drunk, and I wasn't trying to get back together or anything.

Can we just pretend it didn't happen?

It didn't happen.

Thank you.

No, Karma, you didn't kiss me.

You kissed Amy.

I what?

[yells]

[intense music]

Principal Turner: Today is Hester's last day of school forever.

That's right, I give up.

I have tried to save you from yourselves, but you have remained academically undisciplined, reckless, and a bad influence on each other.

You have left me no choice.

At tomorrow's board meeting...

What?

I am recommending that Hester be closed and that you all be assigned to new schools before you can do any more damage.

What are you going to do about this, Lauren?

Nothing. Not my school, not my problem.

I'm going back to Dallas.

Leila, Lisbeth.

She didn't even sign my yearbook.

Turner's shutting down the school?

We need to do something about this.

We need to talk about that kiss.

So you remembered?

I know what you're thinking, and you're totally right.

I am?

I am the worst best friend ever.

I am so, so sorry.

You were there for me when I was spinning out, and I go and I do the worst thing I could possibly do.

I wish I could take it back.

I don't know what I was thinking.

That's what I figured.

But listen, I promise I'm gonna make it up to you.

This is gonna be the summer of Karma and Amy.

Three months together to get back on track.

No Liam, no Reagan, just us.

After we find a way to keep Hester open.

Because we're spending the rest of our lives together, and that includes school days, right?

[laughs softly]

According to my intel, the school board's divided.

We can still win this.

If we can convince Mina Daniels to vote in our favor, Hester is saved.

As the leaders of the school's most powerful clubs...

Ahem.

[door opens, closes]

And sports.

We need to come up with a plan.

Great exposish, Wend. I'll take it from here.

So, first...

Whoa, whoa. Who put you in charge, Shane?

You're not even in any clubs.

But I've known Turner was bad news from the beginning.

I was the only one to get naked in protest.

What's your plan?

Get dirt on the swing vote, thr*aten to out her?

Well, yeah. What's yours?

Bang her sister?

No.

We should organize a peaceful protest at tomorrow's board meeting.

Non-violent social justice is what Hester is all about.

All in favor of Shane's plan?

[playful music]

I've been blackmailed by Shane before.

It works.

And all in favor of Liam's awesome, much better plan?

♪
♪

Et tu, Brenda?

Well.

Great.

Now that's settled, what kind of protest should we do?

Drama club could create an immersive, avant-garde experience.

Yarn bombing, hello?

Everyone will have a chance to make their voices heard.

[squeals] Lauren, we can't wait for you to get back to Dallas.

We've missed you so, so much.

Thanks, Lana and Leslie. Oh, I've missed you too.

Austin has been a nightmare I can't wait to wake up from.

Uh-huh, we need to catch you up on all the goss.

Misty S.?

Mm-hmm?

Totally pregnant.

Oh, and ew, remember Mr. Flint?

He's now, wait for it, Mrs. Flint.

[chuckles] He's a transistor?

Lana: I think it's transformer?

Transgender?

Well, whatever it is, it's gross.

Lana: We're all trying to get him/her fired.

I don't really think it's gro...

OMG, Lauren. Misty S. was dance captain.

Her spot is open now.

You're a lock for it.

In all my years as an educator, I have never come across a school quite like Hester, and I mean that in a bad way.

Hey. It's not too late for my plan.

No need for blackmail.

This protest will work.

There's no way they're gonna shut us down.

Too late to get my name on the list?

Karma? You want to protest?

Can you imagine if they sent us all to different schools?

Saving Hester is bigger than anything going on between us.

Right on.

You can go before Penelope does, whatever it is she's planning.

It'll make perfect sense, trust me.

If I can't save it, no one can.

[slams]

Thank you, Principal Turner.

We will now hear from the students.

[murmuring]

Members of the school board, Hester's motto is, "Together, we stand apart."

And in that spirit, our student body's shown up to protest this injustice.

First up, the madrigal choir.

Young man, we don't have all day.

You have five minutes.

What?

You can't do that.

We can't do anything in five minutes.

We can do that. We are doing that.

[singing and murmuring]

[phone chirps]

[phone chimes]

Amy.

It's been a while.

I've missed you a lot, and if I could just come in for a second...

Who is it?

Um, Amy, this is Heather. My girlfriend.

Hi.

Oh. Hi.

[playful music]

[laughs softly]

I moved in two weeks ago.

It's soon, but when you share a connection like ours, why wait?

Wow.

That's just so inspiring.

Heather, honey, uh...

I think we're running low on tea.

Will you brew some more?

Oh, yeah.

Okay, spill. What's going on?

Oh.

[laughs softly]

I know it seems like I came back here to get back together.

But in fact, I wanted to... give you back this hair band.

I know how much you hate your hair in your face.

It's Karma, isn't it?

[sighs]

It's okay.

You can talk to me about it.

That's the perk of having an ex-girlfriend, right?

It is?

Okay, then... well, here it goes.

I'm starting to have feelings for her again.

[sighs]

And she's still...

Yup.

Still straight.

And I'm miserable.

Again.

And when I was with you, I was actually happy.

[poignant music]

But you've moved on, and I'm stuck going backwards.

Amy, if you don't want to move backwards, then you need to push yourself forward.

Okay, you can't keep relying on other people to get over Karma.

You need to do it on your own.

I've tried.

Have you?

Because the only way I know to get over someone is time and space, and you've never done either of those.

Why don't you just get out of town for a while or something?

[upbeat music]

Do you still need someone to film that tour?

♪
♪

[shouting]

Vashti Nadira reporting live as Hester's future hangs in the balance.

And this balloon represents censorship.

And this balloon represents tyranny.

[pop]

Order! I will have order!

I told you this place couldn't be saved.

We should have gone with my plan.

Oh, I'm sorry that I didn't want to cheat and lie my way to victory.

What's that, Liam? You don't like lying?

That's funny, you never mention it!

Guys, stop fighting.

If we lose Hester, we could be split up from our various best friends.

I should have known it was all about Amy.

It's not all about Amy.

Thank you for enlightening me.

[whistle blows]

It's all about her!

[whistle, crowd silences]

I've got something to say.

[Lauren clears throat]

Okay.

When I first came to Hester, I thought, "What the [bleep] is wrong with this place?"

Drama club is cooler than football?

The most popular kid in school is an obnoxious gay guy, and his best friend is a straight manwhore, and it's not even a little weird.

Two girls pretended to be lesbians.

Lauren: Why?

Because at Hester, being different makes you cool.

I had a hard time with that.

The one thing that makes me different is the one thing I've always tried to hide.

I'm intersex.

I never said that out loud before I came here.

Turner wants Hester to be more like other schools, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but...

I think other schools should be more like Hester.

[poignant music]

Because... this is a school that accepts you, even if you don't accept yourself.

Yeah!

Whoo-hoo!

[cheers and applause]

[upbeat music]

♪
♪

[cheering]

Put me down right now.

You want to come celebrate?

I have to go home and unpack.

Lauren: Leila! Lisbeth!

Well, I guess neither of us was meant to save Hester.

As much as it pains me to say, Lauren was.

Yeah.

Shane, you're not a bad person.

I'm sorry for saying that you are.

And I'm sorry I called you a Booker.

And that was a low blow.

Celebratory drum circle in the quad.

I'm game if you are.

Sure.

Let's go b*at one out.

Amy?

Karma?

[sighs]

Do you know where Amy is?

Oh, honey. Didn't she tell you?

Tell me what?

girl: Here we go, girls. Tour starts now.

Whoo!

Yeah!

[somber music]

[lively music]

I think you forgot something.

♪
♪

Hey.

You were gonna take off for the entire summer and not say goodbye?

I was gonna call from the road.

Okay, I know what's going on.

You didn't want to tell me that you're getting back together with Reagan because you know deep down, it's a bad idea.

I'm not back together with Reagan.

She's staying here this summer with her new girlfriend.

It... it's your mom, isn't it?

I mean, Bruce is moving out, and... and you don't want to deal with the drama.

Do you really have no idea what this is about?

You kissed me.

I know. I messed up.

But we can't let that kiss ruin everything.

I mean, this is our chance to get back on track.

I don't want to get back on track.

I can't keep getting back on track.

The track is just a loop that runs straight through my heart over and over and over again.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that this year has been so hard, but, I-I mean, you didn't show up to save Hester, and now you're taking off for the whole summer.

Why am I the only person fighting for us?

This is fighting for us.

No, this is running away.

We've never spent this much time apart.

I mean, what... what if we can't come back from this?

I mean, what if this is the beginning of the end?

We promised each other... roommates in college and... and houses next door to each other.

Best friends forever.

[poignant music]

Don't you want that anymore?

Yeah, I do.

Of course I do.

♪
♪

But if I don't go, we'll never be able to have that.

Yes... yes, we will.

We will. This is us.

We can make it through anything.

Then we can get through a summer apart.

Hey, camera girl? We got to go.

Amy. Please.

What do I have to do to get you to stay?

♪
♪

You can tell me that that kiss meant something.

♪
♪

[sighs]

♪
♪

I can't.

♪
♪

[laughs softly]

Have a good summer, Karma.

♪
♪

[engine starts]

♪ Oh should I follow ♪
♪ You there ♪
♪

♪

What's this?

Your birth certificate.

Your real dad's name is...

C. Wilder.

How'd you find this?

Eh, my family has a PI on retainer.

It's handy.

So what do you say?

Want to go find him?

[upbeat music]

[laughs softly]

♪
♪

Peterson?

Mm-hmm.

Williams?

Mm.

Avilez.

Yup.

Harvey.

Here.

Jones.

Mm-hmm.

Being a lifeguard is such a huge responsibility.

man: Worthy?

Maybe later, we should practice mouth-to-mouth.

Ashcroft?

Ashcroft?

Ashcroft?

I'm sorry I'm late!

♪ Hey-ya hey-ya hey-ya ♪

What?

Well, you guys are in for an exciting summer, but it won't be all fun and games.

♪ Hey-ya, hey-ya, hey-ya ♪
♪ You have the magical feel free to see what's more ♪
♪ Hey-ya, hey-ya, hey-ya ♪
♪ You have the magical feel free to see what's more ♪
♪ Hey-ya, hey-ya, hey-ya ♪

girls: Whoo!

girl: See ya!

Adios!

Ow!