04x02 - Mistaken Identity

[bunniefuu]

Will you marry me?

Yes! Yes!

[Both laugh]

Previously on "Mistresses"...

I think I might give this music thing a sh*t, like, focus on it.

There's this painting fellowship I read about.

I used to be an artist, and then I had a kid and put it on hold.

And then I had the store, and that became my life.

"A desire that had always been there."

Whoa! You're my nanny.

Joss: He's hot.

This is a terrible idea.

[Applause]

Barbara: I read your book, and I loved it.

I think we can do big things together.

[Public Enemy's "Give It Up" plays]

Woman: One! Two! Three! Kick!

One! Two! Three! Hut!

Nice. [Claps] All right, partner up. Time to spar.

Whoa, whoa. Joss, no.

Find someone else. Marisol's too advanced for you.

No, I got this.

♪ Who protects us from us and you from you? ♪

Ready.

Go!

♪ I sued them bastards, yeah, they got bounce ♪

[Grunts]

Okay, Joss. That's enough.

No way.

Hey!

You're gonna get hurt.

Not if she does first.

♪ Am I loud enough? Yeah, you got to give it up ♪

[Chuckles]

Come on. Let's go.

♪ Give it up, give it up, got to give it up ♪
♪ Give it up, give it up, give it up, yo ♪

[Coughs]

♪ Give it up, give it up, got to give it up ♪

[Groans]

[Panting]

[Birds chirping]

♪ ♪

Does this outfit look artsy in a hip Topanga Canyon way, or artsy in a sixth-grade art teacher way?

Is one of those supposed to be the right answer?

Fine. Will this make a good impression on a woman who could help determine my future?

Isn't she just one of your customers?

Yes.

But she's not just a customer.

She's on the board of the Creative Capital Fellowship.

The thing I've been talking about applying to.

Right. Totally remember.

Just roll it by me one more time.

It's a fellowship for artists... Painters, sculptors, whatever...

But it's crazy competitive, and I need a board member sponsor me to even apply.

That's the customer.

Lucy, what do you think?

I mean, it looks fine, I guess.

Helpful.

You can text Peyton later.

Why don't you read about some current events?

[Sighs] If I get it, it would be, I mean, my dream come true.

So we got to make sure that you get it.

But it's a huge time commitment.

I'm needed here, and let's not forget about Randy and the store.

Oh, first, we're good here. Right, Luce?

See, she babysits herself.

And second, I could help out at the store whenever.

You guys, what does a sexpert do?

A what, now?

Excuse me?

A sexpert. Do they do sex things?

Because according to this, Aunt Karen's L.A.'s newest sexpert.

Shouldn't you be busy texting Peyton?

I know. It's great, right?

Uh...

I'm not sure I knew this is the image we were going for.

Ah, don't sweat it.

Look, I booked you a meet-and-greet at the Sex Stop.

Wait. Isn't that a sex store?

Yeah.

But it's a classy sex store. They sell books and flavored condoms.

The best way to get a decent offer on your second book is to up the sales on the first, so we need to strike.

And this is how we do that?

Well, yeah. Pretty much.

[Vivian coos]

You're really good with her.

Babies love strong men.

So...

You two... yet?

Oh, no, no.

Okay. I'm gonna go before you can object anymore.

You guys be good.

[Door opens, closes]

Everything ready for mommy group?

Yeah, here is your kid... and your diaper bag.

Okay.

[Vivian coos]

Okay. Bye.

♪ ♪

[Thud]

You know what? I just realized, I'm the boss now.

Doesn't matter if I'm a little late to work, does it?

Oh, yeah? Okay.

Mm.

[Moans]

Whoa. What happened here?

Oh. Um... it's from my class.

Your self-defense thing.

Mm, yeah.

It's a little more than self-defense, but don't worry.

Hey, hey. Looks worse than it is.

Come here.

[Doorbell rings]

Don't worry about it. Shh. Don't move. Don't move.

[Doorbell rings]

[Groans]

Make them go away. Come on.

But, but, but...

Hello?

Surprise.

Kate, what are you...

Oh, my God. Is that your sister? [Laughs]

What?

You never said anything about coming to visit when we spoke on the phone, you know, last week.

It was a "spur of the moment" thing, and I had all these miles, and I just really needed a break from all this wedding planning before I k*ll Mum.

And I wanted to see you guys and the new place.

Wait.

Did I interrupt something?

No, no. We're just fixing the...

Oh, oh.

That's... No, we were doing some, um, laundry.

Got it.

Laundry.

So, we ask our fellows to commit to a minimum of eight hours a day in the studio.

If you're accepted, is this something you feel like you're willing to work toward?

Absolutely. This is all I have ever wanted since I was 16 and illegally painting murals on the sides of freeways.

Okay, well, then since you're serious, can I give you some advice?

Your work should speak for itself.

I'd like to see a new piece, something that shows us who you are.

I can do that.

Wonderful.

The only issue is this year's deadline is in two days.

Two days?

But you can always wait till next year if you feel that's better.

Two days is fine. I've got it covered.

Good. Can't wait to see who April Malloy really is.

♪ ♪
♪ It's mommy time, mommy time ♪
♪ Babies, please beware Let's open it up.

Who has the first mommy question this week?

My doctor said to wait six weeks before having intercourse again.

Okay. Not really a question.

Well, it's been eight weeks, and, um, my husband's ready.

Obviously, we're in the clear now, medically.

Um, I'm just freaked out.

My nether regions are still traumatized and not quite ready to play.

That's very normal for new parents.

Actually, um, I was wondering what Karen thought about this.

Karen?

Me?

I saw your article this morning.

I had no idea that you were all about sex and sexy stuff.

Well, I wouldn't say that's all I'm about.

I actually have a question for Dr. Kim, as well.

You know, when you're finished with Dottie's.

I'm sorry, but we just don't have room.

How could you not have room for a class that I'm already in?

I understand, but [sighs] each mommy group has its own chemistry, and your energy has become a distraction.

My energy? W... what does that mean?

It means that a celebrity energy is not one we court.

So, you be in charge?

This would be your restaurant.

Yep. That's the idea.

Sole owner, sole decision maker.

Okay, in that case, if I make it into this band, what do you think about us playing there?

You know, like a regular gig!

Well... [Sighs]

You're getting a little ahead of yourself, aren't you?

Don't you have to get the job first?

It might make me more enticing if I come with a venue.

Yeah... W... well, not really at the design phase, yet.

Not sure if it's gonna be a live-music type of place.

Yeah, no. I hear you.

But just think about it, 'cause it could be fun.

Yeah. Hey, uh...

Do you know Jonathan Amadi?

Yeah, the guy who owns all the hotels, restaurants, and night clubs?

He seems like a jackass. Why?

Rocco DiSpirito set up a meeting for me with him tomorrow night.

Oh.

Apparently, he saw the show, thought I was very charming.

The editing on that show was amazing.

[Chuckles] Just be careful. I don't trust anyone with that much money.

Well, I don't have to trust him or not trust him.

I just have to have a drink with him and keep Rocco happy.

Just make sure he pays for you.

Duly noted.

Kate: Wow. You guys are engaged.

Congratulations.

[Both laugh]

Yeah. Um...

Uh, well, anyway, it's... it's perfect that you used all those miles, because Karen and April are actually throwing us a little engagement dinner on Saturday night and I thought, "What a perfect excuse to buy a new dress!"

And there is a pop-up shop right here.

I didn't actually have any miles.

Oh.

My ticket was crazy expensive, but I needed to come.

Yeah, I thought it was a little strange that you just showed up like that.

Is everything okay?

Yes.

But there's something that I need your help with, and you can't tell anyone.

Um, okay.

You're kind of freaking me out, Kate.

I need you to help find me a really hot, preferably tall, possibly Latino guy...

[Laughing] What?

I don't think they sell those here.

Kate.

Okay.

I came here to have one hot fling before Brian and I get married.

He knows all about it. He only asked that I did it in the United States.

You know, with an ocean between us, so I can have my fun time and go back home like it never happened.

Ooh! That's a cute one.

♪ ♪

Um, can we just back up, Kate?

I... Why... why would you want to do something like this?

That's not like you.

I know. It's not.

That's the point.

I mean, I've been with Brian for 10 years.

I mean, I don't even know what "like me" means anymore.

Well, having an affair a month before your wedding seems like a really weird way to figure it out.

It's not an affair. It's just... It's that Brian's the only guy that I've... I've been with.

Do you not want to get married?

Of course I do.

It's like when you buy a new car and it works great, never breaks down, it's super comfortable...

You don't just trade it in for a new model years later.

That's exactly what you do. It's called leasing.

Well, fine. Well, I'm not like that.

And I don't want a new car.

Okay.

Just to test drive something new one time before I walk down the aisle.

Kate, I'm... I'm really sorry, but Harry would k*ll me if I had anything to do with this, and Brian seems like a great guy.

[Chuckles] He rescues baby animals for a living.

He's a vet! He helps all animals.

[Sighs] Okay. Fine. I get it.

I'll do it myself.

I've heard of this place called the Basement?

Apparently, it's where all the hot actors hang out.

Do you know it?

Uh, yeah. I know it.

And I know you're not going there.

It's gross and sticky, and so is the clientele.

No. No way.

See? See, this is why I need your help. Come on.

[Sighs]

Okay. Uh...

I... I'll help, but only if we do it my way.

Thank you. Thank you.

Hannah claimed she was kicking me out because of my "energy," but the real reason why she's kicking me out is because the other mom's kept asking me questions...

Not her... Because they read the article!

I don't blame her.

Would you want a slut-spert in your class?

That's what Jello1933 calls me.

All right. You know what?

It's time for you to step away from the Internet comments.

This stupid article is ruining my life.

I didn't even know so many people still got newspapers.

Ooh. You look smoking-hot in this pic.

I'm sorry, but you do.

This whole thing is getting out of control.

I wrote that book as a form of therapy, not a how-to manual.

And Barbara's got me doing Q&As at p*rn shops.

I went to medical school!

Okay. Yeah. Sure. I get it.

Um... is it okay if I keep this?

What? No.

Aren't you off the clock now?

Yeah.

Goodnight.

Goodnight.

So, you know, I told Kate that I'd help, but really I'm just gonna ride it out.

Hopefully, she realizes how crazy this all is.

I don't know. That doesn't sound like Kate.

Exactly. See, none of this sounds like Kate.

She's supposed to be the Davis with the common sense.

I don't want to talk about the article.

Okay, hey, but wait. Can we at least talk about the picture?

'Cause you looked gorgeous!

Haters are gonna hate, sweetie.

Um, Karen.

Can I ask your advice as a medical professional?

Yes, please.

I'm glad someone remembers I'm a doctor.

How do you feel about... pre-wedding sex with a stranger?

Joss, you just got engaged.

No. [Laughs] Not me.

Um, Kate, actually.

Oh.

Yeah. I know.

Apparently, she wants to have some sexy stranger danger before she gets married, and I don't...

Well, new experiences can be healthy for a marriage as long as both partners are on the same page, but I wouldn't recommend it at this stage.

Thank you.

Hey. I agree, okay?

I just wanted some professional backup.

Listen, she's obviously gonna be at the engagement dinner.

Do not say a word about this to her.

And don't invite any sexy Latinos.

Help has arrived! Who needs sheets?!

[Chuckles] Oh.

[Laughs]

Mwah. Thanks again for doing this for me, babe.

Hey, I meant what I said. I... I'm happy to help.

Now get busy and start painting.

She wants to see the real April Malloy.

I don't even know what that means.

Did I tell you that the Voluspa Candles are buy one, get one half-off just for today?

Maybe I should walk you through how to ring them up again.

April, Don't worry. Stop stalling. I got this.

Okay.

Hello.

Why...

Goodness.

Sorry.

I've been so distracted with the details for the new bistro.

Hey, how's everything going with Kate?

Hmm?

Oh, she's great. I think she's, uh... [Chuckles]

She's really excited to be here.

What do you say we all get dinner tonight before my meeting?

What do you... You, me, and Kate? Together?

Yeah. Just the three of us. Where is she, anyway?

Oh, well, she's probably doing some online shopping.

What's going on? Are you okay?

You're acting stranger than usual.

No, I just don't think dinner's a really good idea. You know?

Kate wants to do this thing and I don't think you want to be there for it.

Well, why not? What thing?

Mm.

Oh, you're having a girls night, like a bachelorette party.

Not with a male stripper, Joss.

Uh, yeah, like that.

But only if the male stripper were a one-night stand for your sister a month before she's getting married.

[Chuckles]

What?

What? She wants to have an affair?

Well...

What, has she lost her mind? Have you?

Hey! Whoa. Easy now. I... I tried to talk her out of it.

How could she do this to Brian? He's funny. My family adores him.

He digs my food. He never misses my birthday.

Okay, now I'm starting to worry that you want to marry Brian.

I want Kate to marry Brian.

Apparently, that's still the plan.

She said that he... He knows about all of it, and he's totally fine with her sowing her oats.

Well, then she's completely delusional, because there is no way you can go back to normal after something like this.

You know what? I'm gonna stop this. I do not want my little sister to blow up her whole life for one night!

No, no, no, no, no, no. Look, you cannot.

I was not supposed to say anything to you, okay?

So just let me talk to her.

I got it.

[Sighs]

Harry?

Okay.

Okay, fine. You have until tomorrow.

And after that, I'm stepping in.

And if that happens, she's not gonna like it one bit.

♪

[Sighs]

♪ Warm as the summer sun Hmm.

♪ Focused on the only one I know ♪

[Sighs] Let's go. Two days, April.

You've only got two days. [Breathes deeply]

♪ Forget about it all for a while ♪

[Cellphone ringing, vibrating]

[Sighs]

So, what can I do for my favorite new client today?

You can cancel the meetand-greet at the sex shop. I can't do it.

Actually, it's the Sex Stop, and it's too late.

Already set up.

Look. [Sighs]

I had no idea the influence this article would have.

I got kicked out of mommy group...

Mommy groups are worthless.

All you need is common sense and a nanny, and you've got one hot one that you're clearly into.

I am not.

And this isn't just about the class.

It's about how the rest of the world is seeing me.

This isn't what I signed up for.

[Sighs] I've made my decision, Barbara.

Well, your decision is terrible.

If you want to go ahead and ruin your life by denying yourself the opportunity to sizzle, then, by all means, go ahead.

[Telephone ringing]

I just won't be around to stop you.

I don't have that kind of time.

Hello? No. I can talk.

I'm sorry I had to call you.

It's fine. I'm here.

Thank you so much.

The timing sucks. I know.

I asked the band if the audition could wait, but they said it's down to me and one other guy.

And they're deciding tonight.

So if I don't show, it goes to the other dude.

Uh-huh.

And I tried to get Randy to stay, but he's got a therapy session that he couldn't move.

No, you should go. This is important.

How's your painting?

Oh, it's going really well.

I was actually just getting on a roll.

You know what? Why don't I just stay?

No.

Go... seriously. I... I'll finish later.

Okay. I can't wait to see it.

Mwah!

[Bells jingle]

[Sighs]

I should have bought that dress earlier.

Oh, um...

Hey, Kate, do you mind coming out here just for a sec?

Look who it is! [Chuckles nervously]

Karen, what are you doing here?

You called me.

Anyway, you know Karen.

Um, Dr. Kim.

She, uh... She has a lot of experience dealing with the kind of thing that you're thinking of doing.

What a coincidence.

Yeah.

I just thought that maybe you wanted to talk to somebody to make sure that you understand the potential repercussions of your decision.

Sometimes people don't realize the toll these decisions can take on a relationship, Kate.

Acting impetuously can lead to trust issues, not to mention regret.

Karen, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but... I'm not contemplating losing my virginity.

Brian and I have had plenty of sex in the past 10 years. All kinds.

Yeah, we don't need the details. Just...

But it's still just with one person.

I don't want to enter into my marriage wondering what else might be out there, but I also don't want to give up on what Brian and I have.

She makes a good point.

I should probably just go.

♪

[Clears throat] Can I wear this?

Harry: Jonathan Amadi?

Harry Davis.

I can't tell you what an honor it is to finally meet you.

Likewise.

Please, sit.

Thank you.

I've been following your work since your sous chef days at Lucques.

And I have to say, I'm very impressed.

Wow.

Never thought I'd be a blip on the radar for a guy like you.

So you know about me. You're familiar with what I do?

It would be weird if I wasn't.

[Cellphone chimes, vibrates]

I do have to apologize.

My next meeting got pulled up, so I only have a few minutes.

I heard about your bistro, and I have some ideas.

Sorry, how did you hear about my bistro?

I know lots of people.

I want to help you make your place great.

Wow, uh, Jonathan, I'm not really looking for a partner.

Just imagine...

You can do anything you want to do with your restaurant, no matter what it costs. That's what I'm offering you.

I help fund dreams for people who I believe in.

Don't look at me as a partner, more like an angel investor.

Whatever I want.

Whatever.

[Cellphone chimes]

Oh. I'm sorry. I have to go. But please stay as long as you want. And if you're interested... call me.

♪ That I'm losing my mind ♪
♪ And I like it ♪
♪ Baby, with you, I can see ♪
♪ That I'm losing control ♪
♪ Yeah, I want it ♪
♪ Baby, with you, I can see ♪

Thank you.

Joss: Hey, you've reached Josslyn Carv...

♪ And I like it ♪
♪ Baby, with you, I can see ♪

Hi, it's Kate. Leave a message.

♪ 'Cause your my love drug ♪
♪ You're my love drug ♪
♪ You're my love drug ♪

Kate: Ooh. What about him?

Kate, that guy looks exactly like Brian.

I guess I have a type.

So... what about Brian?

Is... Is he doing this, too?

Ooh, what about him? The guy with the hat?

He's kind of sexy in that man-orexic way.

Oh, no, no, no. Definitely not him.

I'm pretty sure I slept with him...

What?

Or I sold him a condo.

Aah!

Oh.

Oh.

[Chuckling] My bad.

Okay, I'll get us some new drinks.

Or we can go home and watch a movie and eat some popcorn.

[Scoffs]

I'm Kate.

Hey, I'm Brian.

Nice to meet you.

[Sighs]

[Breathes deeply]

[Sighs]

♪

[Both chuckle]

[Laughs]

So, yeah, this has been great, but why don't we go downstairs and check out the other bar, where we can get some dessert or...

I'm just starting to have fun!

Yeah, I know.

Kate, I just don't think that...

Joss!

Harry? What are you...

I called you a dozen times and you still didn't answer... Neither of you.

Well, yeah. It's... it's impossible to hear a phone in here.

Joss, you said you were gonna stop Kate.

Instead, you're out doing God knows what.

You told him?

Of course she told me.

No, okay. I... It's more like he guessed.

This is none of your business, Harry.

Whatever I decide to do, it doesn't concern you.

Is there a problem here?

Stay out of it, mate.

I've given this a lot of thought.

This isn't normal behavior for someone who's about to get married.

Like you can talk.

What is that supposed to mean?

You're the one who's marrying your ex-sister-in-law.

And last time I checked, there's nothing normal about that.

What do you think Mum's gonna say when she finds out, huh?

Wait, y-your mother loves me, but is that true?

Joss.

You really think everyone's gonna fly in to celebrate this?

I thought you were happy for us.

Well, I lied, and everyone else will, too.

Have you told your mom yet? Or Savi?

I left a message...

'Cause it doesn't seem like the sort of thing I'd be screaming from the rooftops.

Okay, Kate... enough. We're going.

This isn't like the time you tried to stop Billy Barns from kissing me in school. I'm not 12.

Billy Barnes was a moron and you were too young.

Now come on.

She said she wants to stay.

Didn't ask you, pal.

Whoa, whoa...

[Grunts]

Man: Hey! You. Out.

Okay.

Uh, yeah. Okay. We're... we're going.

We're going.

I'm not going anywhere.

Fine. Do whatever you want.

♪

What did you expect me to do?

I mean, Kate's a grown woman with her own vag*na choices.

Oh... Kate. Please, do not use Kate and vag*na in the same sentence.

The point is I can't keep her hostage, and you're acting like a crazy person.

All right, fine. Maybe I didn't handle it in the best way.

Sorry.

You think, Harry?

'Cause now she's in there by herself, which is exactly what we're trying to avoid.

She's making a huge mistake.

You know what?

If you were paying any attention, Harry, you would have realized that's exactly what she thinks about the two of us.

I mean, is this weird, what we're doing?

I just... Yeah, I... I... I still haven't told Savi, but, you know, it's scary.

She was only here for a little bit of the trial, but we're not exactly in the best place. But tell me, Harry, why haven't you told any of your family about this?

Joss, please don't read too much into that.

What? No. I... I think that maybe we should postpone the party.

At least until Kate leaves.

I don't want to be throwing this in everybody's face, especially if she's uncomfortable.

No, Joss. April and Karen have put a lot of planning into this party, so I will be there, with or without you.

So what I want doesn't matter.

In this case, no. Not really.

You're being very melodramatic.

Well, you coming?

[Sighs] You know what?

My melodramatic self will find another way home.

♪ ♪

[Door opens, closes]

What are you doing up, little girl?

Couldn't sleep. Are you gonna call me "little girl" forever?

Even when you go off to college.

Mom, what happened?

Oh, I was just having a rough time getting into the swing of things.

I don't know. It looks pretty good to me.

Eh. It's more of the same.

Carol wants more "me," and I wish I knew what that meant.

Do you remember last year at my new school, I kept trying to fit in so much?

You told me all the time to be myself and try not to be what other people wanted?

Yes.

You told me, like, every day.

It started to get annoying.

Where is this going?

But you were right. I finally listened, and it all worked out.

So believe in yourself, Mom, because you're pretty great.

Am I on fleek?

Oh, my God. Don't say that ever again.

So embarrassing. I'm going back to sleep.

[Cellphone chimes, vibrates]

Tell Peyton I said goodnight.

[Door closes]

[Chuckles]

[Breathes deeply]

[Sighs]

[Whirring]

♪

[Whirring stops]

[Whirring]

[Whirring stops]

I didn't have sex last night... in case anyone was worried.

♪

You guys actually like it? Not just because I did it.

April, honey, you know I don't have much of a poker face.

Yes, we actually love it.

[Sighs] Okay.

Whew! I feel so much better now.

Thank you.

I'm meeting Carol later, and you guys have calmed me down.

[Laughs]

So... back to your crazy night.

How did it end?

Oh.

Um, it ended with me somehow in a huge fight with Harry and Kate.

Yeah, Kate thought that I was judging her, and I was [scoffs] just trying to help.

You know? I'm not... I'm not judgy.

That's, like, my thing.

That's true. It is.

And, actually, she was... She was judging me.

She was the judgy one.

Apparently, she's weirded out that I'm marrying Harry because Harry was married to my sister, but you guys don't think it's weird, right?

Oh, God. Do you?

Well, we don't think it's weird anymore, but we see you all the time.

You could understand where Kate's coming from.

It'll just take her some time to get used to it.

Yeah. For so long, it was Harry and Savi, Savi and Harry.

Now it's Harry and Joss, Joss and Harry.

It's... it's an adjustment for people, especially now that you guys are getting married and not just dating.

Okay. So can we cancel the party?

Because now I have new plans to be hiding under my pillow.

Cancel?!

Yeah.

10 pounds of crab legs are on ice at your house.

No, I... I... See, I don't think I can handle this.

W-what are we doing? Celebrating my impending "awkward marriage"?

We didn't say that. But if it helps you, maybe we can think of it as a housewarming.

[Sighs] Okay.

But that means no slideshows or... or presents or glass clinking.

No toasts.

Okay?

Okay.

Done. Fine. I got to go.

[Door closes]

So, how did it go?

Great.

She finally went down for her nap.

Man, that kid has a serious case of FOMO.

Oh, FOMO... "Fear Of Missing Out."

[Chuckles]

Feel free to use that at the Sex Stop.

I canceled that. Let's just pretend the whole sexpert thing never happened.

Well, why?

Because I'm a doctor. I can't be hawking serious advice next to "naughty nurse" costumes.

Um... I finished your book, and you could totally do that.

I'm sorry. I couldn't resist.

It was, uh... It was a page turner... A hot page turner.

I'm happy you enjoyed it, but I'm starting to wonder if publishing it was a mistake.

I care about being taken seriously in my field as an academic and a therapist, not a public expert on all things sexual.

Well, why do you have to be one or the other?

You're both, Dr. Karen Kim.

Why not just own it?

♪

Are you sure I can't get you some, uh, tea?

Oh, I think it's best if I get to it.

Better for everyone.

Okay.

April, it's good.

[Sighs]

I am so happy you think so.

But it's not great.

Oh.

You know, one thing I've really learned since being on this board, it's always best to be honest, even brutally so.

Brutally, huh?

Your work just isn't at the level required to get into this program.

Now, listen. Now, don't get me wrong.

[Chuckles]

April, you can paint.

But...

You just don't seem to have "it."

I could recommend you, but you won't get in.

You're that sure, huh?

I'd feel like I'd be encouraging you to uproot your life in a way that won't benefit it.

Look, you have a beautiful store and a lovely family.

Your life seems really good.

Allow painting to be something that you enjoy recreationally.

But good luck with everything.

Thanks.

♪

[Bells jingle]

[Sniffles]

You sure you don't want to talk about it?

[Sighs] If I talk about it, I'll get teary.

If I get teary, I'll ruin my makeup, so...

Yeah. I'm sure.

Understated enough?

[Chuckles] It's beautiful.

Understated, classy... Just a backyard bash for two people who aren't speaking to each other.

So you still haven't made up with Harry?

Nope.

Kate?

Not so much.

What about Harry and Kate?

Uh, not speaking.

How is the night gonna work if no one's speaking to anyone?

And if we still can't say "engaged."

Alcohol may help.

You know what? I could use one, too.

♪

[Indistinct conversations]

Great news.

I got into the band.

That's great, Marc.

And here I was thinking I was just an amateur who couldn't keep up, and they kept talking about my skill level and everything that I bring to the group.

Isn't that amazing?

Uh-huh. Amazing.

[Sighs]

Aren't you gonna ask how my meeting went?

Oh, no. I'm sorry. I totally forgot.

Well don't worry, because it went terribly is how it went.

Oh, come on. I'm sure you're exaggerating.

Start from the beginning.

Well, the beginning is that I only had two days to do it, and what was I thinking that that would be enough time?

And then when I finally got into a groove, I had to come and replace you in the store.

Wait, are you saying this is my fault?

No. I mean, I'm not saying it's not your fault.

She did mention that it looked rushed. So maybe if my thing had mattered as much as your thing, this would have turned out differently.

That's what I'm saying.

I need a refill.

So, how's the search going?

Find the right guy?

[Scoffs] No.

But I actually needed to apologize to you.

I shouldn't have brushed off your advice earlier.

You were just trying to help.

Please, you don't have to apologize.

Joss means well, but sometimes she can choose the wrong approach.

True.

But she did give me your book, which I read very quickly.

Oh, God.

This book is gonna be the end of me.

That part about the hotel makes what I'm doing look so innocent.

Well, I wouldn't go that far.

The point is, I think the book is great.

You've lived quite a life.

With you being open and honest about your mistakes helped me take a step back and realize what I need to let go of.

And what I need to hold on to.

I'm glad to hear that my story actually helped someone.

Reading you book was like therapy for me... but cheaper.

[Chuckles]

I should go talk to Joss.

Oh.

♪

I hope you're not hiding in here because of me.

Because I... I was drunk last night. Like, pbht, super drunk.

I noticed.

I was so over the line with everything that I said about you and Harry.

It was really all my stuff, you know.

Well, let's just say that apparently you weren't over the line, because everyone thinks it's weird, and now I think it's weird, and now this party feels like a funeral.

[Doorbell rings]

[Indistinct conversations]

Why don't I get that.

Mm-hmm. Interesting.

I wouldn't have paired the blue cheese with the tuna myself.

But, hey, everyone's got to make their own judgement calls, right?

Come on. Let's get you another cocktail.

Sure.

So how did your meeting with Mr. Moneybags go?

Fine.

He showed up, made some suggestions about the bistro, and then took off.

Haven't heard from the guy since.

That was probably for the best.

You don't get to where that guy is without doing some bad stuff.

Well, at least I can go back to the original plan and finance this baby myself, right?

Cheers to that.

Yeah.

And now that I got into the band, we can rethink the whole livemusic thing, huh?

Uh, we were thinking maybe we should get dinner started soon.

Fine by me. Though I'm not particularly hungry.

How many of those have you had?

12. Mm-hmm.

Ah.

Why don't I just take this?

Mnh. Mnh-mnh!

I'll tell the caterer.

Well, this is fun.

[Insects chirping]

[Silverware clinks]

[Clears throat]

[Clears throat]

Is this what all American parties are like?

Marc: I could grab my guitar, maybe... liven things up a little bit.

Maybe you should get the whole band to come.

Karen: Oh, I know. Who wants to see photos of Vivian again?

Anyone? Robert just sent me a video.

[All groan]

I've seen Vivian. I want to see pictures of that hot manny that you're still not sleeping with.

[Thud]

Joss: [Clears throat]

[Clears throat]

[Clears throat]

[Sighs] Okay, you know what? Enough of this.

[Glass clinks]

Joss: No offense to my friends, but this is the worst engagement party I've ever been to, and that's including my last one.

More wine, anyone?

I know that you all think that it's really weird that I'm marrying my ex-brother-in-law.

Okay? I get it.

Um, but I honestly, truly... I don't care, because you know what? I've never, ever been a person that cared what anybody thought about them, and it straight-up feels crazy that I allowed myself to do it now, especially when it comes to you, Harry.

I love you with all my heart, and I want every single person at this fricking table to know how much I love you, okay?

Joss.

And I know that we had a really messy, confusing, you know, complicated start, but it brought us... it brought us here to this moment, and I... I wouldn't change it for the world.

Because that's our story.

[Voice breaking] And I'm sorry, but you've made me happier than anyone or anything, ever...

♪

Hear, hear.

Mm.

[Glasses clink]

I love you.

I love you.

What's this?

[Sighs] What does it look like?

Look, I... I promised you that I'd help you and I bailed.

If I had been here, you would have had more time...

I shouldn't have blamed you, Marc.

It's not like I was gone for a day. It was an hour, and I don't think more time would have been helpful.

What do you mean?

[Sighs] I'm done with this, with art.

It's not me. I thought it was, but I was wrong.

Come on. You can't just quit.

There are months that I played guitar so much, my fingers bled.

And now, somehow, I'm in a band...

A real band that people have heard of.

Not many, but still.

But that's just it.

I don't want to bleed for it.

Not anymore.

April.

It's okay to let go of some of your dreams to whittle your life down from the things you want to the things you have that already make you happy.

I was an artist once.

But it's not who I am anymore.

You sure about this?

Yeah.

Now I can focus on spending time with Lucy.

Soon, she'll be way too cool to even talk to me.

[Chuckles]

[Sighs]

Lucy: Hey, Noel.

I thought you weren't allowed to hang around boys.

I'm not. I changed your name in my phone to Peyton.

That's who she thinks I'm talking to all the time.

What if she finds out you did that?

Please.

My mom's the worst with technology.

She still uses Siri.

[Chuckles]

♪

[Door closes]

Hey, slugger.

What's up?

It's a gift from Jonathan.

Hmm.

Whoa!

[Chuckles]

Nice Scotch, buddy.

Yeah.

[Chuckles]

Hey, look at this. Oh, wow.

It's a little mock-up of the bistro.

Huh.

Aww.

Guess he's interested after all.

[Chuckles]

Looks like someone has a crush on you.

[Both chuckle]

He's not the only one.

Is that right?

Mm-hmm.

Oh, yeah?

[Both chuckle]

[Knocking]

So I obviously can't cook like you, Harry, but I'm great at take-out, and I was hoping these would somehow make up for how I've been acting.

Well, I will graciously accept your burrito.

I admit that it's helping a little.

Agreed.

And there's something that I need to tell you both.

[Sighs]

Brian had an affair.

Brian.

The guy who talks to little animals cheated on you.

Yeah.

And I had this stupid idea that if I did it, too, then somehow we'd be even.

Because that's all... That's all that Brian wants, for us to move forward and be together.

But after last night, I realized...

I want what you guys have, which is why I called off the wedding.

Oh, Kate. I'm so sorry.

You sure about this?

[Voice breaking] Yeah.

[Sighs]

But the good news is, um, I've decided I'm going to stay here.

No point in going home to my... my broken life in Sydney.

I'm going to stay here and find the true love of my life.

Here.

In L.A.

[Chuckles]

Hey. How did it go at the, uh, Sex Stop?

You glad you did it?

Actually, I am.

It was pretty great.

I forgot how good it feels to share my expertise, and I learned what a demisexual is.

Oh. That's good to know. Might come in useful in the future.

Wait. I want to... thank you for saying what you said the other day. You were right.

I can be a sexpert and a doctor.

They're not mutually exclusive.

Who cares if some people have a problem with it?

Not everyone's gonna agree with what you choose to write about.

Look, what people do after they read your book, that's on them.

You can't be responsible for anyone else's bad decisions.

Just my own, right?

♪