04x05 - Soccer + Desi + Merchant + Titan

Episode transcripts for the TV show "MacGyver". Aired: September 2016 to present.*
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"MacGyver" centers around Angus "Mac" MacGyver, who creates a secret U.S. government organization where he uses his extraordinary talents for problem solving and his extensive knowledge of science to save lives. A reboot of the 1985–1992 ABC series of the same name.
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04x05 - Soccer + Desi + Merchant + Titan

Post by bunniefuu »

Well, listen, no rush, but, uh... do you think our little project's gonna be finished anytime soon?

Finished.

Ah.

Oh, it's so simple and clean, isn't it?

I love boxes.

Is that a weird thing to say?

Is that a weird thing to say?

Felt pretty weird when I said it.

Listen, relax.

Signore, you've done your job.

My organization appreciates all the hard work you've done, but...

I'm getting one of my ideas.

I think we should have a demonstration.

Don't you?

Who's this little darling?

That's my baby Stella.

Please. Please don't hurt her.

I'll do anything.

I'll do anything, please.

Ah!

My God, I'd never hurt a rabbit.

What do you think I am, some kind of sicko?

I despise cruelty to animals.

I'm still trying to get this one to go vegan, but she's from the wrong side of Budapest...

Do you know Budapest?

Doesn't matter.

So you were saying that the range of this thing without the antenna is a, is a hundred meters.

Now, now I'm wondering if that's true.

Please. Please.

Don't.

Kristina, what are you doing?

You were supposed to let him get to the postbox outside.

So we could test the range?

Now I've got questions, haven't I?

Ah.

All right, clean this up.

Yes, and I'm very sorry about your father, dear, but, uh... but he was a witness.

Oh.

Right. Tell me what it is you see.

A middle-aged British guy who maybe slept in his clothes and definitely didn't shower.

Incorrect and unnecessarily hurtful.

Actually, I didn't sleep.

Saving the world requires sacrifice.

Of personal hygiene?

It's a cryptograph.

Yes. Thank you.

A substitution cipher where almost every symbol is a variation of the astronomical symbol for "Earth."

It's how they communicate. Who?

The people who infiltrated NORAD and tried to contaminate L.A.'s water supply.

They have a name now.

Codex.

Yes. Codex.

For months I've been intercepting bits of their communications, arcane symbols, running a cryptanalysis, until finally, last night, their words began to appear in my head... not many but enough... and I realized we don't have to wait here like sitting ducks for the next att*ck.

We can actually go on the offensive and hit them where it hurts.

Their wallet.

An organization with their kind of global reach can't function without money.

It's a smart move.

Thank you, Matilda.

You're welcome, Russell.

What is this?

We're trying to be nice.

I'm already over it.

Okay, I'm going to guess that Codex has a few different funding sources.

Arms deals, extortion, dr*gs. Yes.

But we only need one to start.

It involves a man known only as...

The Merchant, whose identity is unknown, an illegal gambling den, Milan, Italy...

...and...

...this.

I think we might be inside of Taylor's brain.

Actually, I-I think I get this.

Codex is using match-fixing as a source of funding.

They're paying people to throw soccer games?

It's actually called football, darling, and, uh, we invented the game, but, yes, The Merchant places large bets on football matches.

Then he recruits corrupt players to throw those matches in his favor, thereby earning millions in winnings.

Millions that go toward future att*cks and the death of innocent civilians.

Based on my intel, we know The Merchant gets many of his football players from Milan's top football team, R.S. Milano.

So if we find one of these corrupt players, we find The Merchant. All right.

There's, like, 30 players on a team, so how do we figure out which are corrupt?

I think I know how we can find the corrupt players.

It's called sports analytics.

We can Moneyball it.

So, most pro team statistics... they're proprietary.

However, Riley can hack whatever we need.

We then write an algorithm, assign values to aspects of players' performance.

We then use that to see if how they should perform matches how they actually are performing.

That should narrow it down.

The team's hosting a big charity event two days before the Finals match.

If my intel is correct, that's where The Merchant will meet his player.

And we'll be there, too.

Tail the player to The Merchant, take The Merchant into custody, shut down millions in funding for Codex.

If we're tailing players, we need unrestricted access.

Someone on the inside.

Maybe someone on the team.

I think I know the perfect person.

I'm so gonna m*rder you.

She also used to be a starting player at Michigan.

Senior year, three goals in the Finals, MVP.

How do you know that?

I don't even remember telling you.

Yeah, you didn't.

You used to have a recurring dream about it.

Crowd was cheering you on and everything.

Used to talk about it in your sleep, a little smile on your face.

Found her college photo.

How do you still have braces?

I didn't wear my retainer, Bozer.

Can we get back to work, please?

Right. This is how it'll go down.

I'll use my connections to get you on the team as a fourth-string benchwarmer.

You've got enough skills to fake that for a while.

I'll create your bona fides online using a defunct team in Belarus.

If Team Milano wants to check up on you, by the time they track anyone down, we'll be on a jet back home.

And we can deepfake you into some game footage.

I did it on my last movie with Judi Dench and a sock puppet.

And... cut.

I'm also gonna throw in a little online presence... give you a personal backstory.

Can I have a Spanish boyfriend?

And a French girlfriend?

Right. Just a quick run-through of the basics.

Kicking the ball with your instep, arm in the air.

Let's see what you've got.

You mean like this?

Yes. Yes, that's, uh... yeah, it's rather good.

Why don't we just save it for Milan?

Very good.

Sophia. Sophia.

I think I'm actually getting the hang of this, being a paparazzi.

It's paparazzo, singular.

Don't embarrass me.

No need. Your outfit is doing all the work for me.

It's called dressing for the part.

I'm a rich and charitable donor.

I'll take one of those.

Bozer, please.

You're meant to be Desi's manager.

I'm testing the food for my client.

Uh, excuse me, miss?

Do that again and I hack your Tinder account.

You have way too much power.

Signore e signori, R.S. Milano.

Kristy Le!

This is so insane.

Why do I feel like I'm about to puke?

This is probably the biggest con you've ever done and quite possibly your cover will be blown, in which case we'll all incur the murderous wrath of a nasty t*rror1st organization who will have no problem taking out innocent civilians who get in the way as they hunt us across the globe.

So pep talks aren't your thing.

Right. Break a leg.

Or not.

No turning back now.

What's the sitrep with our suspect players?

Any sign of a meeting with The Merchant?

That's a negative on the meeting.

Still have visual on all the targets, though.

They're just schmoozing on the field.

Together. Yes.

My player's on the move.

Hi, nice to meet you.

She's headed inside.

I'll stay with her.

We're outside the locker room.

She's upset about something.

We've got no leads.

Get us some intel.

Comfort her.

Make some eye contact, soften your voice.

Okay.

Is that your family?

Si.

Sorry, do you want something?

No, you... you just seem upset.

I'm fine.

She doesn't want to talk.

Forget comfort, ask for help. Appear vulnerable.

Make it seem real.

Um...

Sometimes I miss my family so much, I think I'm gonna lose my mind.

My parents risked their lives getting us to America.

Sacrificed everything.

Mine, too. They worked day and night, always exhausted, so that I could have my dream.

Yeah.

Get up and walk away.

Act embarrassed.

Trust me.

I'm sorry. I can tell you want to be alone.

Wait. I'm sure your parents are very proud of you.

I'm sure yours are, too.

They're not.

I know they're not.

I messed everything up.

What happened?

It's an invitation to an exclusive club.

It's a gambling club.

All it took was one night for me to ruin my entire life.

And now I am someone that my parents will always be ashamed of.

So you made a mistake.

Your parents must know that's not who you are.

You're right.

It's not who I am, and it's not who I want to be.

I'll see you at the scrimmage.

And, uh... thank you.

I want all eyes on Gabriella.

That type of financial distress makes her a perfect target for manipulation.

We're in the VIP section.

I can't get any closer without drawing attention.

Well, looks like she led us straight to The Merchant.

Got any sort of I.D. on this guy, Matty?

No, but he's surrounded himself with enough European dignitaries to fill the U.N.

If it is him, he's smart. We can't grab him there, not without creating an international incident.

Well, I'm game to give it a try. Taylor, cool it.

You need better confirmation if we're gonna arrest him on any sort of authority.

Riley, I need ears on that conversation.

I'm on it.

Riley, we can't hear over the music.

Get closer. If you want me to get any closer, I'll be sitting on his lap.

I need your mic. Hand it off to Bozer.

Sound travels in waves, and when those waves hit the sloped inner wall of a parabolic dish... or a trash can lid... they'll bounce back to a focused position, and that's where you put your mic.

All right, I got it. You should hear it on comms.

Whatever this is about, this really isn't the right place or the right time.

We can discuss anything later...

No, it's not up for discussion.

I'm done with this arrangement.

Look, obviously, you're rather upset.

What I suggest you do is take a deep breath and think about good things, like sunshine and bunny rabbits and your family.

I am thinking about my family.

I want to be able to go home and look them in the eyes.

Normally, I'd say let's sleep on it, but, uh, we've got a match coming up and you made a deal.

I really hate confrontation. It really stresses...

I've made my decision.

Fascinating that you think you have a choice.

It's confirmed. He's our man.

We'll take him during the scrimmage.

Everyone in position? Affirmative.

She's dead.

Merchant's on the move. You take him now.

Can't see him.

He's gone.

No, no, no.

Did you double-check the stadium parking structure cameras?

Triple-checked. Nothing. The Merchant's in the wind.

No, we just haven't figured out where to look yet.

Russ, when was the last time you had a good night's sleep?

Oh. 1994, after a lovely massage in Granada.

Riley, did you get any contact from the team about what happened to Gabriella?

Nothing. I found the hospital where her body was taken, but the morgue and EMT records have been wiped clean.

Codex is certainly covering their tracks.

Yeah, I checked every photo I took. I've got no leads either.

I don't know how, but The Merchant k*lled her.

She was just trying to do the right thing.

I don't get it.

The Finals match is in two days.

The Merchant needed Gabriella to throw the game.

Well, he'll just find another player.

Then let's make it easy for him.

If he wants a corruptible player, let's give him one. Me.

We put on a show, make him think I'm corruptible, set a meeting.

He takes the bait, we take him down.

Then we'd better make sure he doesn't take down Desi with him.

Invitations to the private gambling club where Gabriella lost all of her money.

How did you swing that?

Oh, you know, posh accent, emotional manipulation, blackmail.

Same way I got my first wife.

Thanks to security cameras at the villa gates, we know The Merchant sent a car for Gabriella after she hit bottom.

It's a nice little setup for him, actually.

A one-stop shop for recruiting desperate players.

He'll need a man on the inside, of course, to be his eyes and ears.

He'll probably use the club manager for that.

The manager alerts The Merchant, The Merchant then approaches the players and graciously offers to erase all of their gambling debt in return for fixing matches.

Desi, since you're the bait, you'll be doing the gambling and losing, just like Gabriella.

The rest of us can pose as gamblers and help Desi out at the tables and make sure everybody knows that she's a big loser.

That-that, uh, that's she's losing. That's what I meant.

All right, what are we waiting on? Let's get dressed.

Martini. Shaken, not stirred.

Married people are smug and annoying, but it's kind of fun playing a newlywed.

You know, we never talked about our honeymoon.

I got it. Yellowknife, Canada.

Yeah. Who needs Paris?

They have these amazing cabins where you can sit, roast marshmallows, and watch the aurora borealis.

That sounds amazing. It is.

It's a disturbance in the magnetosphere caused by solar wind.

You were talking about the marshmallows.

Yeah. Yeah, sorry.

Solar wind gets me really excited.

And that's why I married you.

Funny thing is, I don't really gamble.

I hate losing money. Well, it is my money.

Let's blow some cash.

Bust. I'm sorry, ma'am.

You lose.

Manager's not biting.

Perhaps because Desi hasn't hit bottom yet.

Mac, I'm sure you can fix that.

$5,000?

That should get his attention.

Bust. Lady loses again.

He's not biting. We need to go bigger.

Take out a marker...

10,000 euros... lose it on roulette.

That'll make you look reckless and put you in their debt. It's your money.

You sure? If it brings down Codex, you can spend all of it.

Marker up. 10,000.

Place your bets, please.

Now, we really didn't skimp on this, did we?

Betting is closed. What's wrong?

21 was our lucky number.

Thought you told me it was 42, from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

It is, but she always said that she had no luck, so I said I'd give her half of mine. Half of 42, 21. Our lucky number.

My God, that is nauseating.

21 red wins 350,000.

This is not good.

You're meant to be wallowing in debt by now.

This is the weirdest problem I've ever had.

Riley, I need your purse.

Doesn't match your outfit, but okay.

Ma'am? Lady lets it ride. 360,000.

Taylor, I'm gonna need one of your epic sneezes in about ten seconds.

These days the security cameras in casinos are pretty advanced. Taylor.

But some things they can't see? Magnetic fields and eddy currents whirling out of roulette wheels, which can be affected by strong, rare Earth magnets used in purse clasps.

33 black is the winner.

I'm sorry, ma'am.

10,000 marker call.

Desi, you've got incoming.

Prego.

Oh. Pardon me.

Terribly sorry.

Well, The Merchant didn't waste any time.

He's in the building. He wants to meet with Desi now.

We need to find another way up there.

Desi, we're losing visual. You need to radio us your 20.

Stand by.

How is it you always seem to manage to find a coil of rope?

Same reason that I look better in a tux than you do.

The universe wants it that way.

Please wait here, ma'am.

Taylor, that pergola's the best way up.

The interior stairs are heavily guarded.

Guys, I'm in the library.

Flanked by two rooms.

Both have side doors. Two guards in the hallway.

Wait, two rooms? That means we can trap him from both sides.

But he needs to come out the way he came in. Quietly.

Time.

Okay, once they hit the south gate, we have a two-minute window. Right.

Ah, Ms. Le.

Thank you so very much for agreeing to meet me last minute.

I do hope it wasn't an imposition.

Actually, what I did was, I got them to get the best bottle of grappa.

Just-just to make up for it, really.

Oi. Oi, Kristina.

That's actually a bit aggressive.

What you do is you offer somebody a drink, you don't just plunk it on them.

Anyway, we'll know for next time. Won't we?

Okay. Uh, sorry about that.

Sorry.

Some people say that I've got control issues. Um...

Anyway, cheers.

My commiserations.

I hear that you had a lousy night.

Luckily, I'm here to help.

Please. Please take a seat.

Yes, I did my research on you, and, um, I read actually a really heartwarming story, how you were playing soccer in the park in your, in your hometown when you were scouted for a university scholarship.

Is that true? Is it, really? Yeah.

That's amazing. That is... that's talent.

Doesn't happen every day.

Oh.

Where-where was that, again?

The park where I was scouted?

Little busy right now, Des.

Yeah.

You want to know the name? Well, you know the name.

I do.

Uh, it-it's a funny thing.

I'm just kind of having a-a difficult time remembering the name of the park.

Is it... can I ask... that you don't remember, or you don't know?

Ellis Park, Santa Rosa.

Ellis Park. Santa Rosa.

Ellis Park.

It was on the tip of my tongue, too.

Hmm.

Hmm. So... why am I here?

I have a proposition for you.

Tell me.

Would that help your situation?

What do I have to do?

A small favor.

Botch a penalty kick in the first half.

You want me to throw the match?

Yeah.

Oh, uh...

I don't know if I could do that.

Well, that's very disappointing to hear.

Always the same.

I have players, they're in trouble, I suggest something, and as soon as I do, "Oh, my God.

"No, no, I couldn't possibly do that. No. My principles.

"I couldn't look myself in the eye.

And my loyalty to the team."

I don't know if you're telling the truth or if you're feigning.

But surprise, surprise... let me tell you something... everybody does it.

And you know why?

Because it's easy money.


Just a, just a penalty kick?

Well, missing the penalty, yeah.

Missing's the important part. Of course.

It's called spot-fixing.

Yeah, I mean, you can bet on almost anything today. Injuries, throw-ins, or-or a penalty kick, like I say.

Sports betting's got very sophisticated.

But I'm just a benchwarmer. I don't... know how I can get in the game.

You got a point there. Thank you for bringing that to my attention, yes.

Well, what I'll have to do is have a word with the coach.

She and I are on friendly terms.

And we'll see if we can't get you on the pitch, Ms. Le.

Right. On my command.

Okay. Ready.

Hold that thought.

I'll just tell this person to go away and we can, um...

Actually, I need to... Um, I do actually have to take this call.

Oh. I'm sorry. If you...

You want me to wait in the other room. Yeah. If you wouldn't mind.

W-With Kristina. She'll see you out.

Nicely. Thank-thank you.

Lovely. Lovely.

This is good. He's distracted.

I'll take care of the bodyguard and you grab The Merchant.

Wait a minute. ...sarà al partita di calcio domani?

Did you hear that? Ho bisogno di conferma che sia Titan.

Everybody, hold your positions.

Just stand down. Repeat, stand down.

Do not approach The Merchant.

Taylor, what's going on?

I'm gonna have to go back in there.

Are we gonna take this sleazeball or what?

Just go back in and you wrap up your meeting.

You act naturally.

We all rendezvous at the safe house later on.

We can't abort. We have him.

Trust me.

I heard something on The Merchant's phone call.

At tomorrow's game, there will be a meeting between The Merchant and the head of Codex. The boss.

Code Name: Titan.

That's why I called off the mission. We can get them both.

Are you sure you heard it correctly?

What are you insinuating?

That you've been out of your mind.

You're sleep-deprived and it's affecting your judgment.

I can assure you that I'm wide awake.

And this is the closest I've ever been.

I think you mean, "we've ever been." Right?

Because we're in this together? We depend on each other?

And right now, we need to know that we can depend on you.

They'll be there. Did The Merchant happen to say where in the stadium this meeting will take place?

Unfortunately, no.

Actually, I think I know how to locate them, but since Finals games are pretty well-attended, it's gonna be a challenge.

You said challenge, not impossible.

No, we can do this.

Riley's gonna be our eyes in the control room.

Big Brother, coming up.

Des, you hanging in there?

So far so good.

The Merchant thinks I'm about to botch a penalty kick in the first half, but there's no way I'm making Codex any richer.

Not unless you want to fund another t*rror1st att*ck on innocent civilians.

Oh, my God. Do any of you actually know what a pep talk is?

Riley?

Riley, my comms are on the fritz.

I'll just stand by...

What is this? We had a plan.

Well, this is part of the plan, only we didn't tell you about it beforehand.

See, Kristina and I had a long chat last night, and as much as we'd like to avoid another Gabriella fiasco, I felt we needed a little bit more insurance.

Now, hold still.

If I press this button...

...my garage door at home opens.

Just kidding.

The minuscule chip we've just injected into your neck will deliver a high-voltage shock that will stop your heart and k*ll you instantly.

Just in case you had any second thoughts about our arrangement.

Uh, uh, uh.

Right.

Mac?

Do you copy? Mac? Yeah, go ahead. I'm here.

I know how The Merchant k*lled Gabriella.

If I don't throw the game, he's gonna k*ll me, too.

If I do throw the game, Codex will have money for another att*ck.

Wait. D-Desi, slow down.

Mac, he injected something into me that can stop my heart.

_

_

_

Grazie.

We should just focus on finding The Merchant. Get the drop on him before he hits that button.

He's a needle in a haystack.

Desi doesn't have that kind of time.

We had a plan. If we find the boss, we get the boss, we get The Merchant.

That's still Desi's best chance.

Mac.

Mac. Care to weigh in on this?

I need to get to Desi to find out what's going on with that chip.

Just stick to the plan.

Mac to Desi. It's time to use one of those acting tips from Bozer.

I'm at your three.

Copy that.

You okay?

If you need to see through a person's skin, and you don't have an X-ray machine, infrared light can help.

All right, now tell her you're okay.

I need you to sit up, so I can scan your neck.

I'm fine... just give me some space.

By removing the infrared filter from your camera, and exposing the skin to infrared light... for example, from this remote control unit... you'll be able to see beneath the top layer of a person's skin.

The chip in your neck is powered by a remote microwave transmitter.

As soon as he presses the button, the signal is instant.

Up we go.

Well, can we get this thing out of me?

Well, yeah, but that would just tip him off, and he'd trigger it anyways.

Desi...?

You'll figure it out.

I know you will.

Heads up... you guys see the chopper?

That helicopter has to be Titan.

That's his transport of choice.

All right, Riley, you're up.

Checking the restricted access corridor.

I have eyes on Titan.

Russ, Boze, you're up.

He's heading towards the VIP skybox in the southeast concourse.

Four bodyguards.

Kind of had my heart set on two.

If we're gonna go down, we're gonna go down fighting.

Hey, take it easy, Leroy Jenkins.

Let's be strategic about this.

Right, let's burn it down, shall we?

Is that a British way to say "strategic"?

The game's about to start.

Do they have him? Not yet.

What are they doing?

Incendio!

_

That fear is real.

This can't be right.

Not for the head of Codex.

Read this.

_

_

_

_

_

_

Bugger!

Bugger!

They sent a decoy. Does that mean they're on to us?

Could be standing operating procedure, but who knows?

But we've lost him.

There's no Titan, no Merchant.

No way to save Desi.

So, this is nice, isn't it?

Look, I know you're feeling critical about the whole operation, and-and I hear you loud and clear.

I just wanted to assure you everything is back on track.

I've got a new player. She's great.

And in a couple of moments, I'll be able to deliver the funds to you that I promised.

_

Le, you're up.

Mac... I'm going in.

If I don't throw the match by the first half, The Merchant's gonna trigger this chip.

Still working on a plan.

Well, you got nine minutes.

Otherwise, this crowd's gonna get a show they didn't bargain for.

I think I have a plan on how to save you from The Merchant, but you're not gonna like this.

We're gonna let him trigger the chip.

I'm sorry, what now?

This is your only sh*t.

Do you trust me?

Desi, do you copy?

Of course I trust you.

I never stopped.

We can use the crowd.

If The Merchant hits the button on the device, we can trace that signal back to him... he's probably boosting it with an antenna. What's the point of that?

If he pushes the button, it's too late... Desi gets shocked.

No, not if we intercept it before it reaches her.

Riley, what would it take to triangulate that signal using a cell phone GPS?

Software for the phones to communicate.

I could push it through the stadium app. That's genius.

Use the cell phones in the crowd... they won't even know.

Guess I'm hacking the phone company again.

Once The Merchant presses that button, we'll be able to track his location. And Russ and I will grab him.

Right, let's just take this back.

How exactly are you gonna stop Desi from being electrocuted?

I'm gonna build a jammer.

"A jammer"?

Walkie-talkies are essentially radio transmitters.

In order to drown out The Merchant's trigger signal, I need to create a broad spectrum, multiple frequency radio broadcast.

Also known as a jammer.

There's two minutes to go.

According to her instructions, she's meant to botch a penalty kick, but how can she when there's no...?

Penalty.

There it is.

Please tell me that jammer's ready.

Almost. I'm gonna have to get closer, though... the range is too limited.

I need you to buy some time.

Guys, I can't stall any longer.

I'm locked out of the field.

Give me one more minute.

Whoa.

That's my girl.

Here we go.

What?!

Guys, what's going on?

We're tracking him now.

Section 327.

Let's go.

You cut it close there.

Really thought I was a goner.

I can sense your disappointment.

I'm a bit upset right now myself.

Just please accept my apology.

I'll find a way to recover the funds, I promise.

Right.

There's no sign of Titan or The Merchant.

We found his remote.

Means we can't track him.

Well, maybe there will be less bickering.

Are you kidding?

Buckle up, buddy.

Taylor!

Hmm? Wake up.

Ooh, are we celebrating?

Although The Merchant may be in the wind, we spooked Codex enough to shut down the entire match-fixing operation.

It is now defunct.

Russ, even though I'd still call it a win, I'm sorry we didn't get Titan.

Actually, I should be the one that's apologizing.

Codex has become somewhat of an obsession for me, and I may have gone a little bit...

...bonkers, so... cheers.

Cheers.

Excuse me.

Taylor, you all right?

No.

All right, guys, this better be good.

What's going on?

Mac?

We've been going through some security footage from the stadium of every person who sat near The Merchant.

Hoping for some leads.

You brought me in here at 2:00 a.m. for a blurry photo?

I had a friend at DARPA run it through some facial analytics software to see if we could get a clue on Titan's identity.

It's you.
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