05x08 - Slippery Slope

[bunniefuu]

Yes, you are. Hi, Mr. Kim!

Stop!

What's that?

This is Chicklet, my therapy dog!

You is blind?

No.

You have fake leg?

No.

Then what's you problem?

(INHALING)

Anxiety.

Hmm.

And you dog help you with that?

Yes.

She's very affectionate.

Like a regular dog.

She lies on my lap, calming me down...

Like a regular dog.

She goes with me on all of my walks.

Yeah.

That's a regular dog.

And the regular dog stay outside.

(CHICKLET WHINING)

Please, I'm not going to leave Chicklet outside all by herself!

Then probably best you go outside with Chicklet.

All right.

If this is how you treat your most loyal customer, then fine.

Thankfully, Chicklet is here for me in hard times like these.

(PHONE RINGING)

(SIGHING)

ENRIQUE: I just wanna get some dog food. Okay, curbside pickup one time only!

Aeecham.

♪ Mr. Kim?

I just need the cash drawer.

Oh.

Uh, sorry, Mrs.

Kim.

- I just need...

- On the table.

- Oh.

- You want coffee?

Please.

On counter.

Thanks.

I had the weirdest dream last night.

Actually, you were in it, Mrs.

Kim.

(DOOR CLOSING)

Wait a sec.

(WATER RUNNING)

I think I dreamt this.

We opened this cupboard and it was...

Narnia.

(SCREAMING, THUDDING)

Mrs.

Kim, are you okay?

UMMA: Help!

I can't get up.

(WHIMPERING IN BATHROOM)

Okay, Mrs.

Kim, I'm coming in!

(LAUGHING NEARBY)

(GASPING)

Oh my God!

I'm so sorry!

Don't worry, it's my fault.

I'll get you another one.

You don't have to do that.

What kind of juice was it?

You're not gonna find this in the vending machines.

It's cold press.

Oh!

Cold press!

You, uh, you trying to impress, Cold Press?

(GIGGLING)

Whatever, it's basically lemonade.

I've never seen black lemonade before.

That's the activated charcoal.

Helps cleanse your toxins.

That sounds made up.

I know.

It's stupid.

No, no, it's cool!

Cold Press.

And don't worry about this.

I'll clean it up.

Bubba's going.

And Taco Sam.

Man, I can't believe those guys still go by those lame nicknames.

Yeah, Kimchee, so weird.

Ooh!

Cool kid counter.

What's goin' on?

High school reunion.

And these guys aren't going.

- What?

- Hard pass.

Don't you wanna catch up with the old g*ng?

Yeah, our old g*ng was...

kinda an actual g*ng.

Yeah, and if they don't show up, the guys we b*at up will.

They're all rich now.

And surprisingly buff.

I guess fear's a great motivator.

You know, I was in a g*ng back in the day.

We had cool jackets, roamed the school, billy sticks in our hands.

Cheerleaders with batons?

You know it.

Pleats in the streets.

- Oh!

- Whoa!

- Hey!

- Badass!

- I know, right?

- (PHONE RINGING)

Ooh.

Hello?

Mikey T, Ingrid, Jess.

Lame.

You should go.

But, whatever.

Don't forget tonight's couples yoga.

You got it!

Muah.

Muah.

Muah.

Muah.

- Muah-muah!

- Muah-muah!

Ingrid's gonna be there?

My Ingrid?

Yeah, Ingrid.

No, like "my" Ingrid.

- That's what I just...

- (DOOR OPENING)

GWEN: Ah.

Forgot these.

Love you.

Love you more!

Seriously, "my" Ingrid?!

Yes!

"Your" Ingrid's gonna be there.

Buy a ticket already.

Here you go.

What's this?

I know you think banana and bread don't go together but try one bite.

You might like.

Not this.

This.

And this.

And, uh...

(SNIFFING)

Why you both smell like coconut?

It's Janet's new body wash.

We slip and bump head.

No big deal.

It very big deal!

You okay?

Do have a small headache.

Not you.

It's fine.

Bathtub is so slippery!

You fall in the bathtub?

Yeah but don't worry, only one of us was naked.

After I fell, actually, she carried me to the couch.

Fireman style!

Why you not call me?

You were at wholesale.

Don't worry!

Gerald was here to help me, until he fall on me, and then I was here to help him.

Anyway, all good now.

Huh?

(SIGHING)

If you're not gonna have a slice...

The thing about street photography is how it can capture a time and place.

- Nice!

- Thanks.

I took these just walking around my neighbourhood.

Damn!

Rosedale got some grit!

Try Koreatown.

You are so r*cist.

Try Moss Park.

Wait, you grew up around here?

- Yep.

- (LAUGHING)

Over a convenience store.

Got robbed like a dozen times.

A month.

Damn, Cold Press is OG!

(LAUGHING)

You ever get sh*t at?

People tried but...

they could never touch this.

ALL: Ooh!

Yeah, some major S went down, but them's the streets.

dr*gs, break-ins.

They used to call me Five Finger Discount.

- Ooh!

- What'd you steal?

Well, one night I took money from the store.

Wait.

You ripped off your own parents?

It was a long time ago.

I shouldn't even be telling you this.

See, things at home were bad.

Real bad.

My stealing was making me fight with my parents, the fighting was making me steal.

So, I split.

Sweet , living on the streets of the Six.

Worst part, leaving my baby brother Jung to deal with all their crap.

But, he couldn't handle the things I saw on the streets.

What did you see?

Let me put it this way.

Some things in life you just can't unsee.

(LOUD SIPPING)

Hey, Stace!

Quick question.

How long does it take for a woman to grow out her hair from like, here to around here?

Hi, I'm Stacie.

A Black woman with Black woman hair.

I can go from here, to here, to here like that.

- How?

- It's called Black girl magic.

(CHUCKLING)

Why?

Are you looking up Ingrid?!

No!

(SIGHING)

Okay, stalker!

I'm not stalking.

I'm just checking out a friend's website.

Along with all her social media accounts.

They're links on her website!

Is that a crime?

No, but it's evidence.

You're right.

This is stupid.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What are you doing?

Move over.

How come it's stalking when I snoop, but it's not for you?

Sexism.

Feels good to be on the right side.

She doesn't post much.

It's not how much she posts.

It's who reacts to her posts and how often.

See this guy Charles?

He likes all her posts from September to December and then bam, nothin'.

And see this?

Yeah, glass of wine.

So?

(SIGHING)

Look closer.

A personal pan pizza in the background, next to an open box of collagen strips.

And she's only tagged her girlfriends.

You know what that means.

I lost you at pizza.

Your girl Ingrid is "singlid".

She's not my Ingrid.

I'm happily up all up in Gwen's business.

I did not need to hear that.

Well, this was a fun stroll down memory lane, but back to work.

Unless we do a deep dive on this Charles guy.

Yeah, I think we have to.

Out.

Have to pee.

What's this?

Shower chair.

Strong, stylish, just like you.

I slip one time!

So did Gerald.

Give Gerald shower chair.

Hey, what's the big deal?

It's just a chair.

You sit in chair all the time.

Toilet is just a chair.

This is old halmonee chair.

I am not old halmonee.

(SIGHING)

What happen if you fall when I'm at wholesale.

No one here to help!

If I need help, I ask.

But you hear that?

That's the sound of me not asking because I don't need help.

And I don't need old halmonee chair!

(SIGHING)

I still have to pee.

Out, out, out-out-out!

(SIRENS WAILING IN DISTANCE)

Hey!

Look who stopped by!

I was in the neighbourhood.

With Umma's bulgogi.

Your favourite.

Awesome.

What's the catch?

Jung, you're being rude.

I'm used to it.

He's so untrusting.

Probably residual effects from your days on the streets.

Totally.

What are you talking about?

Oh my God, the g*ng stories.

He won't tell me, but I can imagine.

Bad boy g*ng leader who changes his ways for the love of a wholesome exchange student.

Uh, that's Grease and also nothing like what I went through.

Yeah.

Like that time with Kimchee?

What?

When we broke into the car and tried to hotwire it?

Yeah, that one.

What was the plan again?

Hit the road on a crime spree or sell it to a chop shop?

More like joy ride around the city, grab a burger.

(CHUCKLING)

We cut too many wires and the car d*ed.

What else did you get up to?

I think it's best to leave the past in the past.

Oh!

But they're good stories.

People like them.

What do you mean?

Hmm?

Well, um...

You been talking about me?

No!

(NERVOUS CHUCKLING)

I mean...

Okay, yes.

I told some kids at Desmond Centre about you.

But more like how you've turned your life around.

Aw, you're inspiring kids!

You mean I'm like a role model?

Yeah, but it's hard for them to really appreciate what you've achieved without knowing where you started.

You know, on the streets, making tough choices.

Mm.

Like this one time with our buddy Cowboy and this cr*ck dealer.

- Oh my God.

- Go on.

You might not wanna hear this.

Like she said, go on.

I think I did something stupid... with Ingrid.

I may have looked up her old Facebook and Myspace page and I may have sent her a hello.

(PHONE VIBRATING)

Is that her vibrating in your pocket?

(PHONE VIBRATING)

I can't help you if you don't help me.

It's totally innocent.

"So looking forward to seeing you at the reunion" Dot-dot...

Huh.

What?

Two dots.

So?

Or is it supposed to be three dots-as in, "So looking forward to seeing you at the reunion", dot-dot-dot...

Whoa!

Those are some suggestive dots.

Did you show this to Gwen?

(SCOFFING)

Are you crazy?

Sorry!

I will... show it to her.

How considerate, dot-dot-dot.

Stop it.

I'm not cheating!

(CHUCKLING)

Not yet.

I actually invited Gwen to the reunion.

Would I do that if something was going on with Ingrid?

So, you're going to introduce your new girlfriend to your old girlfriend.

(LAUGHING)

(PHONE VIBRATING)

Oh my God Stacie, eight dots!

(HUMMING TO HIMSELF)

(GRUNTING)

(WATER RUNNING)

, , ...

APPA UPSTAIRS: Aggh!

(THUDDING, SCREAMING)

Great.

(MUFFLED CHEERING, MUSIC)

Drink ticket?

Kimchee Han, in the hizzouse!

Taco Sam!

K-Town boys represent!

Yeah-yeah!

It's actually a really bad turnout.

- Oh.

- Damn, dude!

You comin' back to find some of your hair?

You kiddin'?

This is what they call lush, son!

Boom!

STACIE: Yo, yo, handsome.

What's it been, like ten years?

Give or take.

Uh...

Stacie, this is Taco Sam.

Oh, please!

I sat behind this boy in home room.

Right!

Stacie, how you doin'?

How do I look like I'm doin'?

Now let's go in there and dance!

- Same old Stacie.

- Really?

Can I talk to you for a second?

Yeah.

(WHISPERING)

Why are you at my reunion?

Oh, you practically invited me.

(GASPING)

Oh, I know that look.

That's your "my Ingrid" look.

Who?

I forgot she was even comin'.

Damn, Kimchee!

She looks good!

You sure you graduated in the same year?

This is a bad idea.

(CHUCKLING)

Yes!

What do I do?

What do I do?

I'm gettin' a drink.

So we peel outta there, and Cowboy turns to me and goes, "Now you give me your cut." So, what'd you do?

I slashed his tires and made a run for it.

Never saw him again.

- Yo!

- (LAUGHING)

JUNG: Hey!

Hey!

What are you doing here?

Just thought I'd drop by, you know, put a face to the name.

Great, great.

I was just talking to these guys, sh**ting the shizz.

You hear any of that?

Probably not.

Who's this guy?

Jung.

Janet's brother.

Guess you guys have probably heard the stories.

You look a lot older.

Well, not a lot older, but...

Actually, we were just in the middle of talking about street photography...

Yeah, I caught the end of that.

Were you guys talking about the time Cowboy and I ripped off a liquor store?

Well, wait.

Cowboy and you did that?

It was so long ago, who can remember?

I can, 'cause it was me.

Well, the old me.

You used to be even older?

The point is, I turned things around.

And so can you.

You just have to believe in yourself.

JANET: Good stuff!

Inspiring!

Now I believe it's time we get back to...

Were you scared when Janet went to juvie?

I was in juvie.

So, you were both in juvie.

Yes.

Runs in the family.

You should see our cousins.

They're a disaster.

Yeah, I was in juvie first for breaking and entering, and uh, what, uh, what was it the cops finally got you on?

(SCOFFING)

Well, could've been a lot of things.

I think it was the stolen camera.

Mm!

Which I was gonna hock for some reefers, which was illegal back then.

But then got into photography, so I left a life of crime and here I am!

- An inspiration.

- Mm-hm.

Well, thanks for dropping by.

Any time!

Oh, hey!

Um, I'm supposed to drive Mom to her appointment next week, but I'm on probation and Dad's got a restraining order, so.

Fine, I'll take her.

Great.

I owe you.

Great meeting you guys.

Your brother is so hot!

You guys don't look anything alike.

Yeah.

Oh my God.

You look amazing!

(BREATHLESS)

Yeah.

Can you believe it's been ten years?

Right?

So, what have you been up to?

Not much.

Lived in Kitchener for a while.

Oktoberfest!

Sweet.

"Zicke zacke, zicke zacke.

- "Hoi Hoi Hoi!"

- (LAUGHING)

Oh!

And I'm a life coach now.

- Oh!

- Yeah.

I took a three-week intensive course, got my credentials, so if you know anyone who needs help.

"Empowering you with the power of empowerment."

- Great slogan.

- Thank you.

Rob hated it.

Rob?

Yeah, you remember Rob Tomlinson?

He was two years ahead of us.

Oh, yeah!

We played soccer together.

Good guy!

Till you sleep with him.

Kidding!

(LAUGHING)

No, Rob is great.

He really stepped it up after the twins were born.

Oh, you two got married?

Six years and counting.

Oh!

But uh, tonight is not about him.

I was actually just leaving.

Yeah, totally.

Let's get outta here.

What are you thinking?

Under the bleachers maybe for old times' sake?

I can't!

Oh, thank God.

Me neither.

My back is sh*t.

Ah.

But there's a Ramada down the street that does bottomless nachos till ten and Rob's got a ton of Ramada points, so don't sweat it.

Oh.

(GULPING)

GERALD: Mr. Kim?

Are you okay?

I heard a big noise and then some screaming, so...

APPA: Go away, Gerald!

Bathroom is a privacy area!

Ooh!

(THUDDING)

Ahh!

Are you okay?

APPA: No!

JANET: Appa?

Umma?

I think your dad's hurt.

He's making weird noises.

APPA: You make a weird noise.

Appa?

Are you crying?

(APPA CRYING)

You cry!

Go in there and check on him.

- Why me?

- You're both men!

- Well, you're family.

- Exactly!

Gerald, you close store to use the washroom?

Appa's in there and he won't come out.

Yobo, put Sudoku down and finish.

APPA: Everyone leave me alone!

I'm fine!

- Agh!

- (GASPING)

Yobo, I know you're fine, because you don't ask for help.

But if you need help, you're gonna ask, right?

APPA: Yeah.

Well, ask for help now!

APPA: (WEAKLY)

Help.

- (SIGHING)

- I'll get a metal chopstick.

Got one.

Why do you have one?

Oh.

Uh, I don't know.

We should go.

Plus, after : all the good nacho toppings are gone, so.

Hey, you two.

Party's in there!

Oh!

Hey, babe!

Ingrid, this is my super-serious long-time girlfriend Stacie.

You brought your girlfriend.

What is happening right now?

Don't be upset, babe.

It's totally innocent.

Don't go making a scene.

Okay.

Just because you're my girlfriend doesn't mean you can get all up in my face 'cause I'm talkin' to my ex.

Right, right.

Hold my hoops!

- Not that mad.

- Oh, okay.

Hey!

Hey!

You're early!

I'm minutes late.

Which is earlier than how late I thought you would be.

Hi!

I'm Gwen, Kimchee's girlfriend?

Yeah, I'm out.

This is, uh, one too many, even for me.

She seems nice.

I can explain.

You wanted to flirt with your ex, make her know what she's missing.

Pretty much.

What are you doing here?

I like to watch.

- Got it.

- So you're not mad?

Nah, I know what it's like.

My reunion was in April, so.

- So...?

- (b*at DROPPING IN OTHER ROOM)

Love this song!

Oh, this song made me TikTok famous!

Wait!

How many dots are after that "so"?

(SIRENS WAILING OUTSIDE)

Well, I'm gonna go.

We never talk about what happen in there.

Okay.

I still can't believe how limber your limbs are, Mr. Kim.

We never talk about what happen in there, okay?

Okay!

- Thank you.

- Mm.

I think Janet coconut body wash make everything slippery.

Yeah.

It's good thing Janet didn't fall in bathtub yet.

Maybe we should install shower bar for her.

Yeah.

Okay.

- I install tomorrow.

- Mm.

For Janet.

But uh, coconut body wash smell good.

(CHUCKLING)

Yeah, Janet have a fancy new washcloth.

You should try it!

Feel how smooth it made my elbow.

Wow!

Like baby goongdengyi.

(CHUCKLING)

Yeah, I use all over my body.

(CHUCKLING)

JANET: I can hear you!

Good!

I'm just saying, you could've given me a heads up.

I had a whole speech prepared.

- You did?

- I could've.

And what was I supposed to say?

I stole your childhood trauma to gain street cred from some cool kids?

Sure, the truth?

Why not?

(SIGHING)

Look, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

You didn't hurt me, it's just...

Ah, whatever.

It's fine.

I always knew you went through a lot.

I just didn't know how much.

You didn't ask.

Nobody did.

Well, I'm asking now.

Why, you got another group of cool kids to impress?

No!

And those years were hard for me too.

Yeah, I can't imagine what you went through, all that free food and tuition.

How about Appa and Umma micro-managing me because everything they were going through with you was filtering down to me.

And there were a lot of nights we couldn't sleep because we didn't know if you were okay.

I didn't know.

'Cause you didn't ask.

(CHUCKLING)

Ohh, you two are so sweet!

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to eavesdrop.

I just wanted to say, aww!

I should go.

This feels like it's gonna end in a hug.

SHANNON: Oh, it is.