01x14 - Penultimate Patrol

[bunniefuu]

RITA: Previously on Doom Patrol...

You've slipped through my
fingers for the last time.

- [TIRES SCREECHING]
- It's the Chief!

RITA: It's all going to be fine.
Chief disappears all the time.

CLIFF: Into a f*cking hole?
In the f*cking ground?

RITA: Take away the ratty
beard and the baggy jumpsuit,

and I swear he looks
just like Flex Mentallo

from the funny book Danny gave us.

JANE: Flex is the key
to finding the Chief.

Dolores? It's me. It's Flex.

- Flex? Oh, God.
- It's me, baby.

[SCREAMS]

- Dolly, stay with me.
- Flex...

Stay with me.

[SCREAMS]

We need you to turn Grid back on.

If we can find the Beard
Hunter, we can find the Chief.

If I do this, you guys are gonna
have to save Niles without me.

Do it.

I know how to find Niles.
Care to join me?

For Niles.

MR. NOBODY: Finally, after
meandering episodes

of character driven
schlock, we can finally

get to the show that everyone
wanted to see in the first place.

- A superhero show!
- [SNAPS FINGERS]

[font color="# e "]♪ Doom Patrol x ♪[/font]
Penultimate Patrol

[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING]

- [THUNDER RUMBLING]
- _

- [SIGHS]
- So?

- How'd your presentation go?
- Eh...

Did the Brotherhood like it?

Not quite. Uh...

[MR. MORDEN SIGHS]

Um...

They let me go.

They fired you?

How does the Brotherhood
of Evil fire someone?

And after all you've done for them?

All your plans...

the electro ray, the...
the weather control thingy...

the giant robot?

You told me he was going to
bring the city to its knees.

Did you tell them that?

I explained it to them in detail.
The Brain just didn't think...

He just didn't think I had enough...

- zip.
- So that's it?

He canned you.

He replaced me with some gorilla.

They decided to bring in some muscle?

No. An actual gorilla.

He's quite smart, allegedly.
Speaks French.

- You have to go back.
- How's that?

You're going to march into their hideout

and you're going to talk to the Brain.

Make him see the light.

No, honey. I can't... I can't do that.

I got off easy.

This is the Brotherhood of Evil
we're talking about.

Usually when they let
someone go, they let them go.

The only reason I'm alive right now

is because they don't consider
me a thr*at physically or...

intellectually. Their words.

I can't do this anymore.

Oh, no, Millie. Please. Look,
this is just a minor setback.

I am gonna be back on top in no time.

That's just it.

You've never been on top.

You have all these big ideas.

But I am the only one
who buys into them.

I follow you around like a puppy.

- I'm a real dunce.
- No, Millie.

Millie. No.

Please.

I am going to be somebody.

But you're not. You're just a nobody.

And that's what you'll always be.

I'm sorry, Eric.

[THUNDER RUMBLING]

JANE: What the hell
was Mr. Nobody thinking?

Why bring the Chief all
the way to East Bumfuck?

- RITA: I don't know.
- CLIFF: Yeah. f*cking Cub Scout jamboree?

Let's forget Mr. Nobody
for a moment, shall we?

We aren't following him. We
are after the Beard Hunter.

According to Vic's Grid thingamajiggy,

the Beard Hunter has been
in this spot for over a week.

He's stopped searching.

CLIFF: If we're looking for the Chief,

shouldn't we be trying to figure out
Captain Banana-hammock back there?

I don't know how much use
he's gonna be right now.

LARRY: It's strange, isn't it?

Getting fresh air after all that
time cooped up in the Ant Farm.

I am so sorry about Dolores.

If we'd known what would have happened,

we wouldn't have brought her to you.

- It's my fault.
- Flex. That's not true.

That contraption in her,

it went off the moment
we recognized each other.

I should have known they'd
be one step ahead of me.

- I k*lled Dolores.
- LARRY: No, you didn't.

The Bureau of Normalcy did.
You need to remember that.

And after we get the Chief back,

we'll make them answer for it.

We'll make them answer for everything.

CLIFF: Wait. We got something up here.

What's a street doing
in the middle of nowhere?

LARRY: I'm sure they have
a logical explanation.

- They?
- LARRY: Danny. Did I never mention the sentient,

teleporting, genderqueer
street Vic and I hung out on

while Jane lost her sh*t
and tried to get married?

Vic mentioned it.

You really keep to
yourself too much, man.

LARRY: Well, that's Danny,
and you're going to love them.

CLIFF: The f*ck?

[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]

[RITA SIGHS]

- Quaint. Perfectly lovely.
- CLIFF: What do we do now?

Just say "Hello, Street"
like a pack of assholes?

Oh, someone's popular here.

g*ng, meet Danny. Danny,
this is Rita, Jane and Cliff.

[DANNY WHISTLES]

- Danny?
- You two know each other?

_

She's gone, Danny.

Dolores is gone.

- [MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]
- _

I'm so sorry.

This moment is beautiful and
necessary, and I hate to interrupt.

But we're looking for a
lunatic who eats beard hair...

- MAN: Looking beautiful today, sunshine.
- WOMAN: See ya.

Unbelievable.

Ernest. Ernest!

You! Pube Stalker!

It's Beard Hunter. And
I don't do that anymore.

I don't do that anymore. [GRUNTS]

What are you fuckwads looking at?

Where is Niles Caulder?

Uh...

- Mmm...
- You ate his beard, didn't you?

It led you here, didn't it?

And your boy wasn't here.

But Danny was.

They got me off the beard hair
and gave me a chance to start anew.

Baloney. Hammerhead, do something awful.

Give me answers or I'll give you bananas

up your ass one at a time.

Peels on.

- [GRUNTS]
- [CAR LOCK BEEPS]

_

LARRY: Wait. You've
known this whole time?

Why didn't you tell me
the last time I was here?

_

Danny, look at us. We've
searched through two continents

and up a donkey's mustn't-touch-it.

We are hanging on by a thread.

If you can't help us, I'm afraid
the Chief will be lost forever.

And so will we.

_

- "White Space"?
- I know what the White Space is.

_

- And I know how to get there.
- _

[HEART MONITOR BEEPING]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

SILAS: Bad dreams, huh?

- [COUGHING]
- Dad.

Dad...

I can understand that.

I just had a doozy of a nightmare.

The White Space is the area
where there is no story.

The White Space exists
where content doesn't.

It's the space on this
page between the panels.

The White Space. That's
beautiful, heady, poetic.

Now how in the name of
f*ck do we get in there?

Well, I have a flex for that.

- You need baby oil or anything?
- Wait.

It can't be that easy.

Mr. Mentallo here strikes a
pose, and then what happens?

Well, then I open up a pathway from
this dimension to the White Space.

Yeah. What Rita's trying to
say is that we need a strategy.

We have no idea what's waiting
for us in the White Space.

We've dealt with Mr. Nobody
before. First, he'll separate us.

And then he'll use
our past to t*rture us.

Well, we'll just have to
stop him from doing that.

We haven't stopped a g*dd*mn
thing since this started.

- We destroyed the town.
- It got put back together.

Then there was the
Decreator, he ran all over us.

So we summon the Re-Creator.

We nearly ruined the lives
of a group of senior citizens.

They were f*cked when we found them.

Jesus. Knock it off!

Yeah. Our win-loss record is sh*t.

We're not making the playoffs.

Who gives a sh*t? We're past that.

We've fought and clawed our way
through a ton of f*ck ups,

and now we're here.

Knocking on the door to save Niles.

We have to go in. And
we're going in together.

- Let's do this.
- All right.

Everybody, focus.

I need you to focus on the white space.

[GRUNTING]

Anybody? Anything?

RITA: I feel something.

LARRY: Me too.

Yeah.

Is there something that
I should be feeling right now?

LARRY: It's like... Wait. Oh, ooh! Whoa!

Oh, my... [GASPS]

Oh!

[PEOPLE MOANING]

What the f*ck is going on?

- We're all reaching...
- [MOANING]

We're f*cking coming, man!

[ALL MOANING]

sh*t.

[MOANING LOUDLY]

_

[ALL CONTINUE MOANING]

I think I flexed the wrong muscle.

No sh*t, dummy!

[MOANING CONTINUES]

- [CLIFF MOANS AWKWARDLY] Oh, yeah!
- _

Oh! Ahhh!

[LARRY MOANING LOUDLY]

I'll f*cking k*ll you!

Oh, f*ck!

[RITA SCREAMING]

_

- [ALL MOANING LOUDLY]
- [BICYCLE BELL RINGING]

[PANTING]

[GRUNTS]

[ALL PANTING]

Uh... I am so, so, so, so sorry.

I was sh**ting for the splenius capitis.

[GROANS]

And I accidentally flexed
my splenius cervicis.

- They're right next to each...
- Just give us a moment!

Please.

FLEX: Take as much time
as you need. [STAMMERS]

- I... I'm stupid. I...
- [GASPS]

Is that better? Are
you more comfortable?

Yeah.

You reinstalled Grid. Good.

Oh. Yeah, I, uh...

I should never have taken it out.

I'm sorry, Dad.

I screwed up again.

- It's all right, Victor.
- No.

It's really not.

You were right.

I wasn't ready.

I just jumped into this
whole search for Niles

without any idea what I...
what I was dealing with.

That's how Mr. Nobody got into my head.

He just used everything that was
swirling in my mind, and...

my mistrust, and he twisted it.

Your mistrust of me?

I don't know what I was thinking.

- I almost k*lled you.
- No.

I know what you were thinking.

And you were right not to trust me.

Not all of your memories are real, Vic.

Thanks for giving me
another sh*t at this, guys.

[CLIFF CLEARS THROAT]

[EXHALES] Whoo.

Hold up. Why were you even screaming?

- Huh?
- You can't feel anything.

Um, 'cause...

- Did you fake an orgasm?
- What? No!

I have too much respect
for everyone here.

How could you even...

'Cause I didn't wanna
feel left out, okay?

ALL: Aw.

Don't pity me.

- Flex, do your thing.
- Okay.

Everybody, focus.

- You focus.
- Right. Yes.

I'll focus.

[FLEX GRUNTING]

- Anything?
- Jesus f*cking Christ.

I'm starting to feel like this
entire thing is a waste of time.

Stop it. Paul. That's enough. Now eat.

Holy sh*t.

Larry. Language.

Holy sh*t.

PRODUCTION ASSISTANT: Ready for
you on the docks in ten, Ms. Farr.

The boat scene is all set up.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Jane, no one wants to hurt you,
but you have to go to therapy.

Holy sh*t.

[THUNDER RUMBLING]

- Holy...
- MR. NOBODY: sh*t.

We get it, Cliff.

Despite your best
efforts, you all waltzed

straight into the very
trap you hoped to avoid.

What day is it?

[CHUCKLES]

Only the biggest day of your life.

MR. NOBODY: That's right.

This was the day of Larry's big flight.

The day his body would
become a charred Airbnb

for the being from Planet Dickhead.

Rita was about to
stumble into the drink,

and become forever locked in
her own Battle of the Bulge.

Our girl Jane was due to
get a spike in the neck

that would make all of
the monsters inside her

that much more destructive.

And Cliffy was about to turn his T-top

and his wife into a convertible.

- Pretty rough deals all around.
- f*ck off!

MR. NOBODY: You're the ones
that barged into my home.

I should be telling you to f*ck off,

but instead I'm going to offer you

the greatest deal of your pitiful lives.

What if you could have
your old lives back,

minus the horrific
tragedies that destroyed you?

I've had enough of your bullshit.

MR. NOBODY: I'm not kidding,
Cliff. No one has to die.

Just think about it.

You can have it all back.
All of the glory and glamour.

Your life could be whatever
you want, however you want.

[SIGHS]

Wouldn't it be nice,
Jane, if you could mitigate

even some of the damage those
nightmares inside of you have caused?

I can make all of that go away.

What do we have to do?

[MR. NOBODY CHUCKLES]
That's the easy part.

You just have to stay nice
and cozy right where you are.

And stop looking for Niles Caulder.

And why the f*ck should we
believe anything you say?

MR. NOBODY: Because
you know this is real.

You know I do almost
anything I set my mind to.

You know I've done it before.

What happens to the Chief?

MR. NOBODY: That's the beautiful part.

You don't worry about him because
if you stay here in this memory,

you won't ever meet Niles Caulder.

He will cease to exist in your world

and fade from your memories.

Stop narrating me, you shithead.

Who you calling shithead, shithead?

Want one?

MR. NOBODY: Okay, now you're tempted.

Yeah, I do. I want one.

We aren't the same team you dealt
with back in the donkey, you know.

We're stronger now.

We've all been working
very hard on ourselves.

MR. NOBODY: Work? You've
sat around in a circle

and whined like a C-team Breakfast Club.

[SCOFFS]

MR. NOBODY: Cliff stole
a watch from an alligator.

Mr. Electricity here finally
came out of the closet

at the tender age of .

Jane crawled as deep
into herself as she could

and almost committed
mind su1c1de or some sh*t.

You call that work? Please.

- CHARLES: Rita?
- Come in.

We're all set. And I've
got some good news for you.

- You do?
- We fired Henry.

The focus puller?

The one distracting you with the, uh...

- you know?
- Oh.

What is it now, Rita?

- Want some help?
- Sure.

- Since when do you wash dishes?
- Since...

- I don't know.
- You're going to be late.

[BOTH MOANING]

You smell so good.

- Am I a good person?
- How so?

As in not a bad person.

Sheryl, what are you going
to do after this flight?

I'm talking about us. Everything
we talked about. All my...

broken promises.

What's going to happen with us?

[BOTH CONTINUE MOANING]

This doesn't feel right.

- Rita, you're fantastic.
- I am?

Sure you are.

Millions of people across
the globe adore you.

What do you want?

You should go.

We'll be watching.

Now, let's get out there, hmm?

And remind them why.

I come back to a memory

where I have it all again.

And then I got my family...

I start f*cking the nanny again.

Don't be an assh*le.

She's right. I should go.

MR. NOBODY: Just like that?

All right, then.

- Last looks.
- MR. NOBODY: Yes, take a long last look.

Because if you leave this tent,

you're going to turn into a monster.

I'd become a monster long before
my accident. I see that now.

I ruined this life once,
I'm just ruining it again.

I'm still a piece of garbage.

The way I was back here
was so selfish, dishonest.

I ruined this family years before today.

I may still have a long way to go,

[SIGHS]

but I know I've become a
better person since all this.

And my stay with Niles has
been a big part of that.

I have to work on my new life.

Sheryl and the boys deserve better

than anything I could have given them.

We got to find Niles.

MR. NOBODY: Cliff, I know
I've been a sh*t this season.

But I'm telling you the truth.

This is all real and
you can save your family.

You don't want to do this. Just stay.

Nah. I call bullshit.

MR. NOBODY: What about John then?

Hmm? You can finally be with him.

John's lived his life.

I should too.

MR. NOBODY: What on Earth are you doing?

Oh, f*ck you.

ANNOUNCER [ON TV]: You have the
power to build the city of the future!

MR. NOBODY: At least one
of you has some brains.

From now on, I'm calling
you "Sensible Jane."

Can you believe the others? The gall?

At least you know I'm
not the bad guy here.

You know I'm trying to help.

[JANE SCREAMS]

MR. NOBODY: Hammerhead,
what are you doing?

Getting us out of here.

You think you're helping
me and the others?

Well, f*ck that!

This was the greatest day of our life.

This was the day we got
some bite to our bark.

No, no.

Stop. Stop.

It's safer here.

Safe? Safer my ass.

The sh*t we went through?

[GRUNTS]

It's safer for others.

We can't be around regular people.

We hurt them. Okay?

[GRUNTS]

[SHOUTING] I don't give a f*ck

about regular people.

We're supposed to protect the girl.

[SCREAMING]

MR. NOBODY: Well, sh*t.

VIC: All I remember from the accident

is waking up on the lawn.

- Mom was next to me, but she was...
- No.

She was still alive.

What?

Each of you were
barely hanging in there.

We rushed you to the S.T.A.R.'s
experimental surgical center.

Both of us?

It quickly became apparent

I would only be able to save one of you.

Then why?

Why did you save me?

It was Niles.

He argued that you were the
better physical candidate

to accept the biotechnology.

But I still wouldn't listen.

Then he made me realize one simple fact.

Saving you...

would be the only choice
your mother would make.

The only choice she would let me make.

[TEARFULLY] So I let her go.

No...

But I remember...

she was on the lawn

in front of the house.

- That was...
- That was a story you were told.

A simple lie,

told over and over again
while you recovered.

Every day...

until you believed it.

So, you didn't corrupt my programming.

Uh-uh.

You messed with my actual memories.

I don't expect you to forgive me.

But I can hope that
you know how sorry...

Do you know how hard it was

carrying this for years?

Why didn't you tell me?

- Why did you do this to me?
- I was afraid.

I was certain it would
destroy our family if...

if you knew I had to make the
choice to let your mother pass.

I was afraid

of having you hate me.

So you let me shoulder
the blame instead.

I didn't realize...

how destructive

my dishonesty was until it was too late.

The story was too powerful.

[INAUDIBLE]

It made you Cyborg as
much as the surgery.

Mmm.

Where are you going?

I got some people I can actually trust.

Friends.

And they need my help.

[CRYING]

MR. NOBODY: Look at these nimrods.

I handed them the happy ending

they wasted decades pining for.

And what did they do?
They sh*t all over it.

Now they were lost and alone

with nothing but my narration
to keep them company.

Most likely, forever.

[RITA SIGHS]

But deep down, Rita knew
everything was going to be fine.

Totally fine.

So forward she marched.

MR. NOBODY: Um, what are you doing?

I'm sick of having
someone else tell my story.

Badly, I might add.

Therefore, I shall be narrating
my own tale from now on.

So she marched forward.

- MR. NOBODY: But you can't just narrate...
- Ever forward.

- MR. NOBODY: Stop it!
- Ever onward.

- MR. NOBODY: It doesn't work like that!
- Eventually,

in a stunning twist,

Rita and her friends found one another.

Cliff!

Rita!

Thought I heard you.

LARRY: Hey, Rita.

Were you just in my head?

I've decided to try
my hand at narrating.

If you want the plum roles, sometimes
you have to write them yourself.

CLIFF: Wait. Where's Jane?

NILES: You all know she
moves at her own pace.

- Chief!
- CLIFF: Let's grab him and bolt.

You shouldn't have come here.

Did you really think
it would be that easy?

If you want Niles, you
have to go through me.

CLIFF: Shouldn't be a problem.

Real you looks like
a f*cking dweeb to me.

Oh.

Right. [LAUGHING]

I suppose this is hardly appropriate

for the big, boring punch 'em up climax.

Is this better?

[LAUGHING]

Now,

who wants to get ripped apart first?

JANE: And why do you want to fight?

MR. NOBODY: Dr. Harrison?

We're getting ready for
the big superhero fight.

This is who you turn into?

What are you overcompensating for?

- I'm not overcompensating.
- JANE: Please.

This form.

This phony darkness. This
childish display of sinister power.

[CHUCKLES] That's ridiculous.

A, I am sinister and dark.

B, I'm powerful enough

to control this entire
streaming service if I wanted to.

What the f*ck is going on?

We are witnessing someone with
a classic delusional personality.

Most likely caused by a
lifelong sense of inferiority.

- Oh, bullshit.
- Is it?

You claim you can control
this television program,

yet, Rita here was easily
able to wrest control by

providing her own narration.

She got lucky.

Or maybe the source of
your problem is a woman.

That is not...

You're just a nobody. And
that's what you'll always be.

Millie.

How are you doing this?

You're doing all this
because you were dumped?

CLIFF: I get it. Standard stuff.

- LARRY: Basic.
- I am not basic.

You don't want to be.

You want to be original.

Despite all the sarcastic
comments and judgments...

- LARRY: He's sad.
- He's like us.

How dare you?

- You were twisted before you were twisted.
- MR. NOBODY: Maybe.

Except now, I have power.
And it's time to die.

CLIFF: I don't want to fight.

- What?
- I don't know.

- I feel kind of bad now that I know you.
- Me too.

- LARRY: Yeah.
- Let us help you.

- Let Niles into your heart.
- No!

This is not right.

You are not going to pity me
any longer. Fight or don't.

But I am going to...

[g*nsh*t]

f*ck.

Booyah.

What? The guy said not to pity him.

RITA: Is that it?

I believe it might be.

JANE: What do you say, Chief?

You ready to go home?

CLIFF: You might wanna brace yourself.

We kind of trashed the place.

- We fought a whole cult in there.
- And each other.

[CLIFF STAMMERS] I had a rat in me.

It's a story for another time.

LARRY: It was quite the wild
ride, Chief, finding you.

I think you all found much more than me.

NILES: Oh, where are they all?

Where are you all?

Sorry, sorry, I was putting on my face.

You think I wake up looking this pretty?

Morning briefing begins
promptly at . a.m.

We want to be a team,
we have to make the effort.

Absolutely. That's why I was down
here at ten to waiting on all of you.

NILES: Thank you, Rita.

Setting the example as always.

Hey, do you use your powers

to stick your nose all the way
up the Chief's ass or...

- [CLIFF LAUGHING] Boom.
- Sorry, everyone. I was on my run.

Hey, way to keep it tight, Hawkman.

Might we start our briefing, please?

LARRY: Briefing? Please. Let's
call it what it is. Breakfast.

Chocolate chip pancakes?

You ate all the
chocolate chips yesterday.

Damn.

Well, let's get to the task at hand.

The Brotherhood of Evil
is on the move again.

Last seen in Brussels.

[ALARM BLARING]

VIC: Looks like the task at
hand has changed. Come on.

Such a shame to leave
all this food to spoil.

[CHUCKLES] You just look
after your own bacon.

RITA: Hmm.

[ALL SCREAMING]

What do you think it is?

Maybe it's that.

[ALL SCREAMING]

VIC: Chief, are you seeing this?

How could I miss it?

LARRY: How do we start it
and how do we finish it?

Same as always. Try talking to it.

I got this. I speak robot.

Hey, big fella. You friend or foe?

Oh. He's foe as f*ck.

Looks like it's going
to be the hard way.

As long as the regular
people are out of danger.

f*ck the regular people.

No!

Oh, where are they all?

Where are you all?

Sorry, sorry, I was putting on my face.

You think I wake up looking this pretty?

Morning briefing begins
promptly at . a.m.

We want to be a team,
we have to make the effort.

Absolutely. That's why I was down
here at ten to waiting on all of you.

NILES: Thank you, Rita.

Sorry, everyone. I was on my run.

Hey, way to keep it tight, Hawkman.

Might we start our briefing, please?

LARRY: Briefing? Please. Let's
call it what it is. Breakfast.

Chocolate chip pancakes?

You ate all the
chocolate chips yesterday.

- Damn.
- [ALARM BLARING]

Looks like the task at hand
has changed. Come on.

Such a shame to leave
all this food to spoil.

[CHUCKLES] You just look
after your own bacon.

RITA: Hmm.

[ALL SCREAMING]

Are you seeing this, Chief?

NILES [OVER RADIO]:
How could I miss it?

Hey, big fella. You friend or foe?

Oh. He's foe as f*ck.

Looks like it's going
to be the hard way.

As long as the regular
people are out of danger.

f*ck the regular people.

N...

- [ALARM BLARING]
- VIC: Looks like the task at hand

has changed. Come on.

Such a shame to see all this food spoil.

NILES: Just...

Uh...

Be careful, please.

- [HEAVY FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
- [PEOPLE SCREAMING]

How do we start it and
how do we finish it?

Same as always. Try...

Run. Run like hell!

[ALL SCREAMING]

VIC: Looks like the task at hand
has changed. Come on.

[PEOPLE SCREAMING]

What do you think it is?

Maybe it's that.

[ALL SCREAMING]

Hey, big fella. You friend or foe?

No!

Chocolate chip pancakes?

- Are you seeing this, Chief?
- Try talking to it.

No, no!

You think I wake up looking this pretty?

- Foe as f*ck.
- Run like hell!

[ALL SCREAMING]

No! No!

You just mind your own bacon.

[ALL SCREAM]

... all the way up the Chief's ass?

Looks like it's going
to be the hard way.

No! No!

[ALL SCREAMING]

Chocolate chip pancakes?

VIC: Looks like the task
at hand has changed.

Run!

Run like hell!

[SOBBING]

- Stop!
- [ALARM BLARING]

Not another step.

[ALARM STOPS]

What's the matter with you?

You can't go. It's a trap.

He's doing this. He's got us.

You mind filling us in on what
the hell you're talking about?

Mr. Nobody.

He's torturing us.

k*lling you...

But me, he's making me watch you die

again and again and again.

- That's impossible.
- Yeah, we b*at him a year ago.

No. You can't.

I should have known.

What the hell is going on here?

And who the hell are you supposed to be?

I was wondering if you'd show up.

One of you better start
explaining some sh*t quick.

[LAUGHING]

The genius finally figured it out.

The Vic that sh*t Mr. Nobody...

was me. [LAUGHING]

[CONTINUES LAUGHING]

That was me all along.

[MR. NOBODY CONTINUES LAUGHING]

Whew. That was getting tedious.

[CLIFF GRUNTS] No way.

How the hell did we get back here?

Or maybe you never left.

Good God.

If stupidity were a superpower,
you would be g*dd*mn Superman.

VIC: Can someone tell me what
the hell is going on here?

And why are we not
b*ating this guy's ass?

Oh, they already tried that.

It's far too convoluted
to go into right now.

You can look out for it during

the "previously on"
part of the next episode.

The moral is basically
there is no b*ating me.

Not now. Not ever.

But you can be free of me.

That's not so bad, right?

But how would you do that?

What is it that sets us free?

You know the answer, Niles.

I could go back to
destroying them again.

I mean, they're basically dead anyway.

And I'm happy to work
Cyborg into the mix.

The truth.

The truth shall set you free.

There it is!

That's what all this has been about?

All the anguish, the agony?

Um... duh.

[LAUGHING] Yes.

But look what else has happened.

Check out your little ragtag crew.

I mean, they couldn't even leave
the house without screwing up.

And now they've made
it all the way here.

And you are the only
thing that can save them.

It's kind of beautiful, no?

Go on, Niles.

Tell them the truth.

I can't.

LARRY: Yes, you can.
You can tell us anything.

RITA: It's all right, Niles.

If there is one thing we've
all learned from this nightmare,

it's that there's no need
for secrets between us.

CLIFF: It's okay. You
can do this, Chief.

[SIGHS]

The tragedies that befell
you, they weren't accidents.

I was responsible for everything

that has happened to each of you.