05x09 - A Modest Proposal

[bunniefuu]

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Whatever happened to predictability? ♪

♪ The milkman, the paper boy
The evening TV ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ Everywhere you go ♪

♪ There's a heart, there's a heart
A hand to hold on to ♪

♪ Everywhere you look
Everywhere you go ♪

♪ There's a face, there's a face
Somebody who needs you ♪

♪ There's a heart ♪

♪ Everywhere you look, yeah ♪

♪ When you're lost out there ♪

♪ And you're all alone ♪

♪ A light is waiting to carry you home ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ Oh ♪

- ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
- Whoo.

Uhh. Is there anything better
than a jog before dawn?

Uh, yeah.

Everything.

You just have to get through
the first 30 minutes,

and then the numbness kicks in.

Oh, but when I say that about margaritas,
suddenly I have a problem.

We never have time to do this.

There's always some crisis going on.

But right now,
everything is nice and calm.

Oh, D.J., why would you
tempt the fates like that?

I have a crisis.

You did this.

Now that I have been declared "the one,"

I must propose...

♪ To Kimmy Gibbler ♪

Aw, that's so great. Congratulations.

Wait. Aren't you already engaged?

I proposed so long ago,
our engagement must've expired.

I'm ashamed to admit
it may have involved a falcon.

I'm also ashamed to admit
that I can't find that falcon,

and I lost a sizable deposit.

Help me, D.J.

I'm not paying for your lost-bird deposit.

You ask your business partner Steve
when he's back in town.

No. I need help with the proposal.

Since you've known Kimmy
all of her life...

you know how to make this perfect.

She deserves the very best,
and to me, the very best means D.J.

Fernando.

Oh. Did you just touch
my cold, dead heart?

Aw, I almost feel guilty

for all the impolite things
I've said about you in my head.

I'm in.

Thank you, D.J.!

Okay, I have to brainstorm this proposal.

- Come on, let's go for another run.
- Yeah, right behind ya.

Okay.

Yeah, she really does
her best thinking alone.

♪ Ooh, la la la la la ♪

This feels so nice.

What kind of massage oil are you using?

Russian dressing.

It's great for neck cramps and pastrami.

Well, it's definitely a step up

from the salmon schmear foot rub
you gave me.

Do you know
I had cats following me for blocks.

Um... this is nice, honey,
but shouldn't you be working?

Oh. Don't worry.
I got a cr*ck team behind the counter.

Aren't there child-labor laws
and health codes?

Because we're currently
in violation of both.

You're not getting paid to complain.

You're getting paid to make sandwiches
for the post-proposal party.

We're not getting paid at all.

You guys should've negotiated
a better deal.

I'm getting a buck a sandwich,
plus full dental and vision.

All right, honey.
Well, I gotta go help with this proposal.

We can't keep the engagement ring
in the house, so I'm gonna give it to you.

It's a big responsibility.

That's awesome.

I like my responsibilities
like I like my sandwiches...

big.

Wait. So he's really contributing
to your 401?

I'm on track to retire at 17.

- Bye, honey.
- Bye.

- Bye, you guys.
- Bye.

See you later.

Uncle Jimmy,
you have that look on your face

that you get when you're about to have
an anxiety scream.

Anxiety!

Okay, I sense something's up.

Stephanie wants me to hold onto
the engagement ring,

and I know
because I'm such a good sandwich maker,

everybody thinks I'm a good ring hider.

No one thinks that.

No one thinks I'm a good sandwich maker?

Anxiety!

I'm-I'm technically not a therapist,
but sounds to me like

just the subject of you holding the ring
is making you anxious.

I've never had a responsibility this big.

Don't you have a baby?

I'm not gonna hide the ring
in a baby, Ramona.

That's the first place people will look.

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪

We don't have much time.
Kimmy is getting her hair done.

Forty-five minutes for color,
15 minutes for selfies.

I'll make this quick.

You want it over-the-top?
Well, you have come to the right place.

I love it.

Oh, the hat isn't the over-the-top part,
but I'm glad you love it,

because as ringleader of this proposal,

you'll be the one wearing it.

I was right to gasp the first time.

Now picture this.

Circus ring over here,

fire twirlers over there,

and a roving squad of acrobats
serving hors d'oeuvres.

I like to call them "snack-robats."

And then I propose.

This isn't amateur hour.
We are just getting started.

I don't think you can top this top hat.

Behold Matt Muscles,

the world's strongest man.

Shouldn't that strong man
be wearing Spandex?

Not if he ate a whole pizza last night.

Next up...

entering center ring,

Stephanie Tanner, the bearded lady.

So I just... stand here looking hairy?

Yes.

She did not say a talking bearded lady.

Up next, we have
our fearless lion tamer, Tommy,

and his ferocious beast... Cosmo.

Tommy, actually,
it's-it's the lion that's su...

You know what? Forget about it.

You just look cute.

And now for the grand finale.

You are going to walk
the tightrope of passion to Kimmy,

and profess your love.

You'll kneel...

give her a ring and say,

"Marry me, amor."

And then the falcon.

No falcon.

I'm back. Where is everybody?

Oh, it's Kimmy. Hide the evidence.

Go.

Vroom.

Ahh.

What's everybody doing out here?

- Watch what...
- No, no, no!

- No!
- Kimmy!

Are you okay?

Oh, I'm fine.

Ah.

I didn't know my ankle
could bend that way.

I'm not a human doctor,

but if she were a horse,
we'd have to put her down.

♪ Ooh-ooh ♪

Well, we finished that fast.

When they pay you zero dollars,

you have incentive
to get out of here quickly.

I'm buying a condo.

Well, let's get these to the house
before the proposal.

Oh, yep. Let me just grab
the engagement ring.

The engagement ring...

which I put where?

- Did you check your pockets?
- That's what this is.

What do you think I'm doing?

Relax. Let's retrace your steps.

Okay. Woke up around 6:00 p.m.
this morning, I had a bowl of Raisin...

No, no, no. Retrace your steps
since you had the ring.

Okay, it was after I gave my fiancée
a massage with Russian dressing,

but before...

I made all of these sandwiches.

I'm gonna go check the lost and found.

Remind me to make a lost and found.

Don't look at me.
Ask Employee of the Month.

When you got it, you got it.

♪ Ooh-ooh ♪

Oh, I hope Kimmy's okay.

I wish Fernando would've let me
go with them to the hospital.

Well, he's only got a two-seater,
and you read every billboard out loud.

I think she's suffered enough.

Look who's back.

Happy faces, everyone.

Hi, guys.

Oh.

Kimmy, I am so, so, so, so,
so sorry about your leg.

Oh, don't feel bad, Deej.

The doctors say
I should walk again in six months.

A year tops.

Let me help you to your room, Kimberlina.

Oh, no, I got it.

I need to practice
crawling up the stairs by myself.

I got... I got it. Don't worry about me.

I don't need any help!

I got this.

Fernando, I've ruined everything.

It's true. You have.

Oh. Well, Deej,
it was a great idea, but...

I think the big-top proposal is off.

No.

No, Kimmy would never give up on us,
so we are not gonna give up on her.

She's my best friend,
and she deserves this now more than ever,

so we are gonna find something
bigger and better

that will blow her mind.

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

So let's put our heads together
and think of something.

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

Well, I guess I have been
hanging on to one last idea.

Yeah! Oh. Really? Now you guys stop?

I know we've gotta find this ring, but...

it kills me to destroy
a perfectly good sandwich.

I'm sorry. You deserved better, fella.

Or ladies. I mean,
why do sandwiches all have to be male?

Pick your battles, Ramona.

I found it.

The ring?

No. The sandwich I made
with only two slices of salami.

I made it as an Easter egg
to myself. Heh heh.

Pick your battles, Ramona.

It's not here, Jimbo. I think it's time
to come clean to Aunt Stephanie.

Yep, guess that's
what I'm gonna have to do.

Uh-oh, here it comes.

Anxiety!

What did I tell you guys
about having food fights?

Not during work hours.

No. No, not ever.

Okay, Steph.

Um... you might want to sit down for this.

But not on the prosciutto. We need that.

Uh...

Here's the deal.

I know I may not always be
the most responsible man

or woman.

But I do try really hard.

Honey, I have the ring.

No, you gotta listen to me on this.

I've been trying to be
a more responsible man

and to listen to you,

and did-did you just say
you have the ring?

Yeah. Yeah, I-I kinda forgot
to give it to you. So...

I guess neither of us
are as responsible as we should be.

We're really gonna need each other
to get through this world.

Yeah. That's what makes us
perfect for each other.

You're like the sneeze guard
to my salad bar.

Yeah. Sure, let's go with that.

♪ La la la la la ♪

Open the hangar door.

Here comes the plane.

Aw, Deej, you don't have to do that.

A choo-choo train is fine.

Uh, Deej, why are you feeding her?
Her arms still work.

Oh, leave me alone.
I'm expressing my guilt through food.

Steph, do you hear that music?

Yeah. Where's that coming from?

Hmm, I don't know, but it's pretty catchy.

Deej, is something wrong
with your shoulder?

Did you guys just make that up
on the spot? Because wow.

Let's go for a ride, sis.

Hey, what's going on?

It's like I'm in It's A Small World,
but without the dirty water.

Whee!

♪ Singing, "Honey, let's get married" ♪

♪ Don't wanna walk alone ♪

- ♪ So let's get married ♪
- Ooh.

♪ I don't wanna walk alone ♪

♪ Let's just get married ♪

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh ♪

- ♪ Don't wanna walk alone ♪
- ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪

- ♪ So let's get married ♪
- ♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ 'Cause we don't wanna walk alone ♪

♪ Or run away ♪

Whoo!

♪ They think they know
What we're going through ♪

♪ They don't know nothing ♪

♪ And I know it's bad when we look out ♪

♪ But bad, bad people
Don't live in our house ♪

♪ So I'm gonna get right for you, honey ♪

♪ I'll take all of my medicine
Spend you all my money, yeah ♪

♪ And I know it's hard enough to love me ♪

♪ But woke up in a safe house
Singing, "Honey, let’s get married" ♪

♪ Don’t wanna walk alone ♪

♪ So let's get married ♪

♪ I don't wanna walk alone ♪

♪ Let’s just get married ♪

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪

♪ Don’t wanna walk alone ♪

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪

♪ So let's get married ♪

♪ 'Cause we don't wanna walk alone ♪

♪ Or run away ♪

♪ Change me at all costs ♪

♪ Starlight is star-crossed ♪

♪ Take me so breathless... ♪

Wait. Fer-Fernando, what are you doing?

She... No, she's broken.

♪ Why don't you change me at all costs? ♪

♪ Starlight... ♪

Hey, guys, what... This...
It's not what we rehearsed.

- I...
- ♪...so breathless ♪

♪ Woke up in a safe house ♪

♪ Singing, "Honey, let's get married" ♪

I... What...

♪ So let's get married ♪

♪ I don't wanna walk alone... ♪

Hey, what are you guys doing here?

You can't have a flash mob
without inviting us.

- He can't tango without his dance partner.
- Uh-uh.

♪ So let's get married ♪

♪ 'Cause we don't wanna walk alone ♪

Dad?

Hi, kiddo.

I just had to be here for your big moment.

What big moment?

Oh, this one.

Hey, Deej.

Steve?

What do you say, Mr. Tanner?
Do I have your blessing?

Of course you do.

Oh, Mylanta.

Donna Jo Margaret Tanner Fuller...

we first met 27 years ago,
and my life has never been the same.

The good times with you
were some of the best of my whole life.

I don't know how we lost each other,
but somehow we found each other again.

Life pulled us apart once.
I never want that to happen again.

I never want to miss
another moment with you

and Jackson and Max and Tommy.

You're the last thing I think about
when I fall asleep at night.

And I would be
the happiest man in the world

if yours was the first face I see
when I wake up every morning.

D.J., will you marry me?

Yes. Yes. A million times yes.

Here.

You.

Congratulations, Deej.

Thank you.

You guys did all of this for me?

No, you did this for you.

And you're totally worth it.

And I've been hiding out in the alcove
for two days, and nobody noticed.

You're impossible to surprise.

The only way to trick you
was to keep you busy tricking Kimmy.

Kimmy and I do not need to get re-engaged.

That's not even a thing.

Oh, I beg to differ.

Fernando Hernandez
Guerrero Fernandez Guerrero,

will you make me the happiest woman alive
and be my husband again?

Oh, my Kimberlina.

Yes. Yes. A million times yes.

Mom, Papa, I'm so happy for you.

You know what this all means?
We're all getting married!

Whoo! Oh.

Does this mean we need to get re-engaged?

No, no. Get up.
That's only for crazy people.

I can't believe
my girls are getting married.

And I can't believe
I consider Kimmy Gibbler one of my girls.

Oh.

Thanks, Mr. T.

Does that mean
you'll pay for my wedding, too?

You're definitely one of my girls.

Oh, today was so beautiful.

And so are all of you.

- I love you.
- I love you, too, Dad.

- I love you, sweetie.
- I love you, Dad.

And I even love you. Move that bow.

You know, it's so nice
to have three daughters again.

All right, if you need me,
I'll just, uh, be in the alcove.

Oh.

Just think.

Five years ago, we all
moved in here together single, and...

now we are all engaged at the same time.

Yeah. Well, I mean,
it's really not that surprising.

Ladies like us
don't stay on the market for long.

I just had the craziest idea.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

We do the dance all over again?
I'll get my chair.

No. No. No, no, no.

We have shared our lives together
for so long...

why not share the best day of our lives?

Wait. A triple wedding?

Well, I, for one, love that idea.

You know, I think I love it, too.

A triple wedding!

Oh, it is gonna be so easy
planning our weddings together

in a beautiful cathedral.

On a beach at Mazatlán.

Up in the International Space Station.

Okay, maybe this will be
a little more complicated than we thought.

Mm.

- More wine?
- Yes.

- Definitely.
- Please.

But don't worry, ladies.
We are gonna figure this out.

Triple wedding howl on three, two...

I do!

♪ Whoa, oh-oh ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Oh ♪