03x09 - The Opening

[bunniefuu]

♫ there she goes

♫ there she goes again

♫ racing through my brain

♫ and I just can't contain ♫

♫ this feeling that remains ♫

♫ there she goes

♫ there she goes again

♫ she calls my name

( meowing )

( Purring )

♫ no one else could heal my pain ♫

♫ and I just can't contain ♫

♫ this feeling that remains ♫

♫ there she goes

♫ there she goes again

Claire, you're drooping.

Higher.

Really?

I want them to feel like the crow is going to peck their eyes out.

Good.

$75, that's so low.

I've never sold a piece in my life.

I want someone to buy it.

Yeah, but it's not just a print.

You got a really good spot.

Do you think?

Yeah, did you see mine?

Where?

Exactly.

Follow me into the annex.

Cool pyramid.

This is weird.

Does Olivier know they put you back here?

Olivier said, "there are only four first-years even in this show.

And some people would be grateful."

Nice.

Whoa, $500?

Isn't that disgusting?

I mean, the copper spray was so expensive, I had to take a loan out to pay for the f*cking thing.

That sucks.

I'll buy dinner.

Hey, you people.

I am needing workers here.

Can you untangle this mobile?

It's by some big alumni idiot and I got it all f*cked up.

Olivier?

Do you think I should have priced my photograph higher?

You two with the price tag and the placement, it's disgusting.

20 years old, you should want to give your work away.

Nobody in this country is born with a soul.

It has to be beaten into you.

There's another part over here that I ruined, too.

Lord only knows where it goes.

Have you seen this?

I don't like that guy, he's too veiny.

Sarge was veiny.

Let's get the new Max summers.

I just don't know why we wouldn't tell frank.

Because there's nothing to say about it.

It was just a fun thing we did.

I know, but it was a fun thing we never did before.

So was the gospel brunch.

We didn't talk about that with frank.

Do you want to talk about that?

No, do you want to talk about sarge?

Not really.

I just thought it seemed like a therapy topic.

I'd rather talk about the dishes thing.

You're still angry about that?

David?

Father Jack!

Please call me Jack, how are you?

Great!

You?

Fine, just fine.

This is due on Wednesday.

So, what did you rent?

Just something Keith picked.

I'll help you over here.

"Sister act"?

Okay.

Jack, have you met my boyfriend, Keith?

No, I don't think so.

Keith, this is father Jack, from Saint Bartholomew.

Nice to meet you.

Likewise.

You know, you still have "back to the cr*ck: Butt munch two".

It was due last Friday.

Okay, uh, thank you.

I'm sorry, I can't.

I can not have this conversation one more time.

I just don't think I can give you what you want.

Love, you mean?

Oh god, I give you love, Lisa.

I f*cking give you love every day.

It's just always some f*cking thing with you.

Introducing Maya to some friend from high school before I introduced you, who the f*ck cares?

It happens all the time.

It's like I'm an afterthought and people notice.

That guy was embarrassed for me.

I can't do any better than this, Lisa, I can't.

And you know, some women might be very happy with a faithful, committed, totally f*cking devoted father and husband, but you're not.

Father and husband.

God, I just don't have anything else for you, I just don't.

What am I supposed to do with that?

Nothing.

I don't know, nothing.

Maybe this just isn't right.

What isn't right?

This, us.

But I ought you loved me.

I do.

But not enough.

No, it's enough for me.

It's not, though...

It's not enough for you.

Alright, I'm fine.

I'm totally f*cking fine with what we have.

You're the one who's not happy.

But you have to make everything about me.

And that's what I can't live with anymore.

So, what are you saying, you want to leave?

Leave?

Oh no, I would have to leave.

Because I moved my whole f*cking life to this sh*thole city!

Not for me, you didn't.

So, you want to split up?

Maybe, yeah.

I don't know, I don't know, maybe, I don't know.

( Door slamming )

( Music playing )

Just a moment.

Ruth.

Why, hello.

I hope I'm not interrupting.

Not at all, please, come in.

That last song was so beautiful.

Did you write it yourself?

I did.

It was just...

Wonderful.

I'm so pleased that you liked it.

I thought I would call it...

"Semi-precious".

For your aunt Pearl?

In part, yes.

I don't know how you can get such a beautiful sound from the computer.

Yes, it's unexpected.

As a child, I played the violin.

But when I went to college I...

Had a very cruel roommate who threw the violin from our dormitory window.

It was hand-carved by my uncle Gunther before he d*ed of polio.

I gave up playing the violin altogether and left college to go to mortuary school.

And it was there, in the computer room, that I discovered another way to make music.

Oh my.

I wonder if you're available tomorrow night to come with me to this art opening.

It's a benefit show for Claire's school.

Apparently, some of these alumni are quite well known artists.

I'm afraid I don't know any of their names.

Claire is really very excited because she's one of the few students whose work has been selected.

I think it's important for her that we all be there.

I would be honored to go.

If you feel it would be...

Appropriate.

Well, of course.

You're a member of our little family here.

Thank you.

That means so much to me.

( Male on TV ) The secret to the firm is the new three in one invention called the "Fanny lifter".

Part one is a six inch segment used in the cardio sculpting.

Part two...

What are you doing?

Huh?

What's going on with dinner?

I couldn't decide.

Why not?

Who cares, meat loaf is fine.

Then I have to go out for meat.

So, we'll make some rice and beans.

The kids had rice already for lunch.

That's okay.

It's one day.

I couldn't remember what we had last night.

We had burgers last night.

Oh.

That's where the meat went.

Are you taking the medication?

Yes!

It's only been two weeks.

He said it takes up to a month sometimes for it to work.

It takes a month for anything to happen at all?

I gained five pounds already, so something's happening.

Her mom's pretty much crazy.

She couldn't deal with arranging the funeral...

I don't think Melinda ever even told her we broke up.

Did Melinda leave any instructions for what she wanted in terms of a service?

No.

She did leave me...

She did leave me a note.

But it wasn't about her funeral.

I tried to end the relationship before, but she'd always said she was going...

I never thought she was really going to do it.

But maybe, in some way I did, because I stayed for years after I wanted to leave.

I finally moved out about two weeks ago, and I thought she was okay.

I mean, she seemed really calm about, and then...

It's like I keep waiting to find out it's all this mistake.

It's not your fault.

This note...

It's so horrible.

You can't blame yourself.

You had to live your own life.

Was she depressed?

For years, yeah.

What was she like?

Rico...

It was like...

You know those tribes or whatever, that think if you take their picture, that they'll lose their spirit.

It was like her spirit got stolen.

And all that was left was this body that she didn't even want anymore.

Was she on medication, at all?

Everything, all of them.

Mostly, it just made things worse.

Then she was on something that was really working, I thought.

What was it?

Paxil?

No, Paxil made her really jittery.

This was a combination of Zoloft, I think, and something else.

She did seem better.

I would've never left if I didn't think she'd be alright.

It's okay.

It's okay.

( Crying ) Mommy's okay.

Mommy's okay.

I hear that when I re-wash the dishes after you've washed them, it makes you feel like...

I don't think you're good enough.

Keith, did David hear you correctly?

Yes.

So, I'm sorry, and...

I'll try not to do it anymore.

Thank you.

Has anything else come up since our last session?

Not really.

David?

Well, we did have three-way sex with a stranger.

What, I just want to make sure frank thinks that's a healthy couple activity.

How did it feel to you?

Fine...

It was a lot more enjoyable than the paint ball.

What do you think, though?

Were you safe?

Of course.

Okay, well, there are certainly a variety of ways that couples can enjoy their sexuality.

And it's totally okay to just have sex with whoever?

Generally, it's best when there's an open negotiation between partners as to what the rules are in these situations, so that both people are equally comfortable.

Hmm.

Were you both comfortable with what happened?

Yes.

Yeah, we didn't exactly negotiate the rules, though...

It just sort of happened.

Is it something you feel you might want to do again?

It was very liberating.

To be spontaneous and kind of wild together, instead of always being so careful about everything.

It was fun...

To be wild.

If this is something that you think you might like to do again, then I suggest you take some time to lay down some ground rules.

Okay. Okay.

Do you need to borrow some blush, honey?

Those peach tones you're wearing just don't pop.

That's okay.

I don't need to pop tonight.

Want some of these for your bag?

I quit, remember?

Oh, I didn't know you were still in that mode.

Yeah, that's the goal to stay in the "mode".

Hmm.

I'm just curious, honey.

What makes you think that was such a problem for you?

Being stoned all day and night?

C'mon, it was never like that.

How would you know?

I work with addicts all the time, and trust me, you're not an addict.

You went through a difficult break-up.

And maybe you needed to act out a little bit, but that was just stress.

I'm not interested in discussing this with you.

Well, you just seemed very defensive when I offered you a joint.

Well, I would appreciate it if you respected my choices.

Well, Brenda, if I thought that they were your choices, and not some 12-step Christian dogma, I'd feel much better about them.

Oh, whenever, in my whole life, have I wanted to take on someone else's dogma?

I mean, that is not a big problem of mine.

No, but you do tend to over-dramatize yourself, sweetheart.

And I'm sorry, but I've known you for a long time.

Thanks for your support, mom.

But I am sorry if you feel I've been insensitive.

Thank you.

Hey.

Are you guys ready?

The car's double parked.

I just have to do one final coat.

How you doing?

Okay.

Yeah?

I'm sick of being so f*cking conscious all the time.

It's like I'm this incredibly boring, watered-down version of myself.

I know what you mean.

What piece have you got in this thing tonight?

It's a new one.

It might suck.

Oh, that's alright, sweetie, it's for charity.

I'm sure it doesn't suck.

You know that blouse might actually work if you got rid of the bra.

Yeah, that skirt might actually work if you got rid of that ass.

( Laughing )

It's 7:15.

Where's the baby-sitter?

I'm sure she just hit traffic.

Ugh, god.

You know, you don't have to come, if you don't want to.

I'm not going for you, I'm going for Claire.

I have a relationship with her, you know.

I know.

I just thought maybe we should talk some more.

Yeah, well, obviously.

Well, that's Kayla.

Oh, f*ck it, I'll just be cold.

Come here, baby.

I'm pretty sure that's Jan Vanhoosen.

Look, he's going straight to his own piece.

Narcissist.

Who would ever buy that?

Moma.

Let's go see if anyone's looking at my piece.

Narcissist.

I just feel bad for it.

Back here all by itself, with no one coming to see it.

Oh my god.

Someone bought it already?

Wow.

Do you think it's a mistake?

Russell, I mean, it's a really beautiful piece.

Maybe that's why I got such a good spot.

Do you think somebody actually thought I was somebody?

You are somebody.

It's pretty good, don't you think, for a 19-year-old?

Yeah, I guess.

It looks like art.

It's dark.

Really?

I think it's kind of funny.

Funny?

It's so...

"What's the point?"

No, come on.

It's like "life goes on".

God, I so totally don't get that, but I know Claire a lot better than you do.

And what, she has no sense of humor?

She has a very dark vision.

I think you just have this one, really old idea about who she is.

Maybe, but it happens to be accurate.

Hey.

It's magnificent.

It's really great.

Thanks.

Claire!

It's so incredible.

Awesome.

God, you guys didn't all have to come...

What are you talking about?

This is a big deal.

It's so not.

Is that Viggo Mortensen?

How did you get the blasted out look?

It's infra-red film.

No, it says "Duratrans".

It's like this process that they use for like ads in airports, it's really boring.

No, it's not.

Oh my god, I loved that movie, I wept.

I remember.

Wow, Fiona Klineschmidt.

Yeah, she's got some pots in the next room.

Nate was deflowered by a mildly famous ceramicist.

I don't think she's coming though.

I heard she's in Japan.

Where'd you guys get the drinks?

I pumped.

So, I could drink tonight.

Because I want to drink tonight.

The bar's over there.

You need anything?

So, what happened to you?

I mean, you were showing everywhere and then nothing.

What, did you get married, or something?

No, I went crazy.

What a drag.

Where'd they put you?

Clarendon.

Oh, that place isn't too bad.

I had another student who used to go there, maybe you met him, Micky Hirschl?

No, but I think they had some of his "feeling art" hanging in the cafeteria.

Huh, how was it?

Not bad.

He had a breakthrough with me.

Well, who doesn't?

The repressed people.

Right, them.

Billy!

Hey!

How are you?

Great, how are you?

I'm... good.

You guys know each other?

Yeah, Olivier visited for a term while I was here.

He was my best student.

After I cracked him open.

Before, it was all too pretentious, right?

It was the first class I ever taught.

You said you taught in Argentina.

I lied.

There's Janny.

I have to go pretend I like his piece of sh*t.

Hey, Janny!

His best student, huh?

I don't know about that.

I'm pretty sure I was the only one who was sleeping with him.

Really?

Yeah, it was a pretty amazing experience for me.

I had a lot of static around my sexuality.

It was totally suffocating my work.

It was a sex thing.

Not a gay thing.

Wasn't that sort of a f*cked up power dynamic, though?

There's always a f*cked up power dynamic in sex...

Isn't there?

Not always.

How you doing?

Fine.

This dip tastes like vomit.

Well, the cheese is okay...

Here.

That's alright, thanks.

I don't want that, thanks.

You eat it.

I don't want it either, I just had some.

So, throw it out.

You don't want that.

I don't?

I'm told it tastes like vomit.

Hi.

Hi.

Uh, Brenda, this is my wife, Lisa.

Lisa, Brenda.

Oh.

Nice to meet you.

Yeah.

You too.

So, what can I eat here?

Disturbing work always takes longer to sell.

Most people want something that's just pretty.

Like the cleaning supply installation?

Yeah, but he was on the cover of "Artforum".

Olivier's right, you can't give a f*ck about what sells.

That's easy for you to say.

Yeah, but that was just a fluke.

My mom probably called from Florida to put a hold on it.

That's sweet.

If my mother buys mine, I'll k*ll myself.

Eh, any assh*le can take a camera to a cemetery.

It's better than the lame self-portraits I did when I was a first year.

Mm, that's true.

( Soft music )

Oh baby, it's so nice in here.

Angie and her boyfriend took the boys to Shakey's and then to play goofy golf.

Mmm. Mmm.

Oh, baby, I can't drink on these pills.

Oh, I forgot.

Even if they're not working yet?

Yeah, you're not supposed to.

Oh.

Sorry.

That's okay.

♫ Our love is here to stay ♫

You know, if this medication isn't working, you can try a different one.

I know, I'm a nurse.

I'm just saying, sometimes it takes a while for you to find the right one.

Baby, I know, I'm a nurse.

Billy's huh?

Mm-hmm.

It's really different, for him, isn't it?

Yeah, I like it, I think.

It's very...

Cool and sort of painless.

You haven't seen it before?

No.

He doesn't use me that way anymore.

That sounds like an improvement.

Yeah, it's my new thing.

I don't take care of anyone else, so, I'll be forced to take care of myself.

Theoretically.

How's that going for you?

Well, I'm still living with my mother.

Yeah, who isn't?

Oh god, that's right, you too.

Temporarily.

We've really evolved.

Ow!

( Laughing )

Whoops, excuse me.

Sorry.

Oh no, come over here!

We're smoking some of my husband's cancer pot, it's incredible.

And I got a ton of it.

He went a lot faster than anybody expected.

Janny was just talking about that pyramid.

You been in it yet?

Too much of a line.

Is fantastic, sensual.

It's plastic, you know?

I thought I heard your voice.

Oh, I looked for you!

Hi.

Hi.

Are you ready to go out and get that drink?

Yeah, in a minute.

You're smoking pot.

You want some?

It's California pharmaceutical grade.

No thanks.

Oh, god, Bern!

Oh, god!

It's lovely, Claire.

Lovely?

The way it looks...

Did you make the frame as well?

No, mom, I bought the frame.

Well, it was the perfect choice.

Well done.

This must be your mother.

Yes.

Mom, this is Olivier Castro-Staal, my form and space teacher.

Oh, it's so nice to meet you.

And you.

This is my friend, Arthur Martin.

It's a pleasure and an honor.

I know you've had quite an effect on Claire.

Not as much as you have.

Oh, why thank you.

What do you think of her piece?

Oh, well...

I think it's very sweet, really.

It's supposed to be disturbing.

It is?

Great art often provokes controversy.

And, if I may, I also feel the image is quite tender.

It suggests the quiet dignity of eternal love.

Hm.

Would anyone else care for a refreshment or an hors d'oeuvre?

No thanks.

I'll come with you.

You think they're f*cking?

No, ew!

Sorry if that was weird before.

It was a little confusing.

I didn't tell Nate we'd met.

But you did know who I was when you came into the spa?

No.

I just figured it out.

Just now?

Yeah.

Then why are we pretending we've never met?

I don't know.

I just didn't want to get into it with him.

I think you did know who I was when you came in.

I'm sorry.

I just wanted to know what you were like.

Well, that's weird and dishonest.

And kind of stalker-ish.

You know, getting a massage isn't really the best way of finding out what happened between Nate and me.

He hasn't been very clear about it.

Why does it matter?

I don't know.

I'm such a wreck right now.

( Sobbing )

He's pretty good at making people feel crazy.

Not that I wasn't.

I am too, I think.

I feel like I've totally lost my mind.

What was I doing, sneaking around like that?

It's so desperate.

It's not desperate.

It's just...

Trying to get something you don't have.

Oh, you mean Nate?

You have Nate.

I think you'll have him forever, if you want him.

He doesn't love me the way he loved you.

He didn't love me...

Not really.

He was just trying to get something he didn't have.

He is such a f*cking idiot.

Oh, he's living life.

( Yelling )

It doesn't feel like plastic.

It feels like those shells abalone?

I know.

It kind of makes me want to build a pyramid to live in.

I understand why you want to leave.

I don't want to leave...

I mean, I'm not happy either.

And I want to blame you, but it's not your fault.

I've known you for so long.

I don't know why I thought getting married would transform you...

It has transformed me.

I know, I know.

I didn't mean it to sound like that.

I know how committed you are.

I just mean, it didn't change the way you feel about me.

God, it did, though.

Not the way I wanted it to.

It's not fair to you.

And I guess it's not fair to me, either, really.

Oh, Lis.

It's good we tried.

I think we had to try.

But don't you think we could, maybe, now, you know just...

Start from a different place?

Neither one of us is ever going to be what the other person really wants.

But maybe that's just bullshit.

This idea of what we want.

Maybe it's enough now to just stop pretending.

And be, like friends, you mean?

Yeah, but not just that.

And you want to be lovers, still?

Yeah.

Without all the pressure.

To be something we're not.

But what if it's never any good?

Well, then we'll know we really tried.

Really tried.

Okay.

Okay.

I feel really relieved.

You do?

I think I do, too.

You see, these f*cking pyramids really do work.

Mm-hmm.

Oh.

Sorry.

It's okay, come in.

Wow, it's really nice in here.

It's supposed to have the same proportions as the pyramids in Egypt.

I thought it was supposed to be this horrible plastic version of a sacred space.

I know, that's kind of a reverse message.

Like modern life isn't always so bad?

Or like, even though we feel like we've lost touch with this more authentic history, there's a...

Continuity that we don't even realize.

Wow, that's really comforting.

I wish we never had to leave.

Um, excuse me.

Do you know who bought it?

Fifi Rochedale.

Is that you?

No, it isn't.

Your old cat's name was Fifi and I don't know where you got Rochedale.

Oh, it's the street.

It's your p*rn name, nice.

God, you're fast.

Russell, it's not like it makes it okay that no one wanted it.

I wanted it.

I love it.

You're in debt.

Yeah, well, it's a good investment.

The thing's gonna be worth like so much more in five years.

This is so weird.

You checked all the stalls?

Yeah, and upstairs.

What should we do?

f*ck it, she's got a cell phone, she can call a cab.

( Laughing )

Might I remove my glasses?

Please, do.

Thank you.

How weird was it that Brenda was there tonight?

I don't know, how weird was it?

Well, she dropped off the face of the planet as far as I knew.

What do you think about him?

He's pretty sexy.

So?

So what?

So, do you want to go for it?

Oh.

Really?

Unless you like someone better?

No, I just thought we were supposed to be negotiating that, if we did it again.

We are negotiating.

I'm saying you can pick somebody else.

But frank made it sound like there are rules or something...

Like what?

I don't know like maybe there are certain things we only do with each other?

Okay, like what?

I don't know... Like kissing, maybe?

That sounds okay.

Unless you think that would be rude to the other person?

I'm sure he won't care.

Okay, well, let's start with that.

That's Patrick!

Patrick!

Hey!

Hey, what about him?

For us?

No way.

Why not? He's so nice.

We're not doing it with somebody we know.

That's just creepy.

I'm gonna talk to the tall guy.

Hey!

Hey!

I thought you were going to your sister's art thing tonight.

Yeah, we just came from there.

How is this place?

I don't know.

It seems pretty much like a free-for-all.

I think I'm not so much a gay bar person.

Is that really sad for me?

No, I think that's really happy for you.

( Shouting )

Mom?

Darling, you're home!

I'm sorry.

It was too late to stop.

Brenda?

Honey, I bought a painting.

( Moaning )

Alright then.

Thank you for a lovely evening.

I should be getting back now.

Oh.

You can stay, if you'd like.

Oh no, I couldn't.

I really should be getting back.

Well, alright.

Thank you so very much.

Thank you.

( Change dropping )

( Banging )

( Snoring)

Thank you.

Let us know if there's anything else we can do.

That's hard to live with.

Someone kills herself over you.

She was depressed.

But he said she was doing fine.

She was on the right medication.

She did it because he left her.

It's depressing how deluded people are about what love is.

Yeah.

Wait, what do you mean?

Like it's gonna make their lives better.

Well, it does, a little, right?

Yeah, it's just not like someone else can change who you are.

Like this woman, Melinda.

That guy was the only good thing in her life...?

He didn't even seem that great to me.

I wouldn't want to be him right now.

Yeah, me neither.

You know, it takes all the goodness in my heart to keep from giving that assh*le in five a triple dose of his stool softener.

It would hurt us more than it would hurt him.

How you doing on the Paxil?

Not great, all I can feel are the side effects.

So, when are you gonna go see Rodgers?

I don't know, I guess I should try and stop in this week, but I always feel like he has no idea who I am.

I go in there for five minutes and he goes down some list.

Yeah, well, they don't really give a f*ck.

They just give you whatever samples came with the best gifts.

You know, when I was depressed, the only thing that worked for me was Celexa with a low dosage of atavan.

I should probably ask Rodgers.

Just try it and see if it works for you.

I mean, you can tell Rodgers that you saw another doctor while you were on vacation, you know?

Here.

I gave you generic.

Still the machine.

Well, I already left a message saying I was coming over.

So, if she wants me to walk in on more f*cking, it's her choice.

You know, I can do it for you.

If you feel like you've seen enough of mom's p*ssy for a few days.

Who could ever see too much of mom's p*ssy?

It's like a trip down memory Lane.

Really, though.

I know, thanks.

I don't even know where everything is.

I can come with you, then.

Okay.

Okay?

Yeah, I think that would help.

Okay.

Good.

I really appreciate you letting me stay here.

I have the space.

It's just until I can get my client list back together.

You can stay as long as you can stand hanging out with my friends.

Is Kenny still over here all the time?

You know what?

He's not that bad.

He used to come into my room and fart on my pillow.

He was 10.

I can't believe how much money I've spent f*cking up my life.

Did you ever find out who bought your piece?

Yep.

Was it your mom?

I wish.

You wish?

Who could be worse than your mom?

It wasn't my mom, was it?

No.

It was Olivier.

Wow.

That's flattering.

I'm sure it's just some kind of head trip.

Why?

You know, to teach me some kind of weird lesson, or something.

What kind of lesson?

Like...

Like he owns me.

You know, just...

His whole power thing.

Well, maybe he just really liked your piece.

Eh...

I kind of doubt it.

That tickles.

Mmm...

( Heavy breathing )

Oh, I fell asleep.

Shh.

It's okay.

Is it late?

No, it's not even five.

Is Maya...?

She's fine, she's sleeping.

How long have you been here?

I just got here.

What?

Nothing.

I'm just happy to see you.

You are?

Yeah.

I'm happy to see you, too.