04x07 - The Infinite Loop

[bunniefuu]

[BRIGHT TONE]

[LIGHT DRAMATIC MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[CELL PHONE BUZZING]

Hello?

Hey, Lylah, it's Richard. Your brother.

Richard, I...
haven't heard your voice in years.

[SIGHS]

Listen, I need your help.

I'm listening.

Well, wouldn't you know,
the boy is making waves.

[SIGHS]

You know, it seems that he's hiding out

in your house in Massachusetts.

Oh, that's fine. I always hated that house.

And we believe that he, uh...

I hate using this word...
Uh, kidnapped a woman.

Oh.

I'm calling so that we can

just keep this in the family.

You have to do whatever it
takes to just keep this quiet.

Well, that's what I do, Richard.

I keep things quiet.

Great. That was it.

Listen, if you need anything,

just put it on the company card, okay?

Okay.

I see how it is.

"Hello, Lylah. Just put it on the card.

Just put it on the card, Lylah.
Just put it on the card."

Well, I have my own cards, you know.

Okay. Fine.

I'm sorry. Didn't mean to ruffle you.

I thought we put the past behind us.

And yet, here we are.

[SIGHS]

Fine, I'll take care of it.

And Richard...

it's lovely hearing from you.

♪ ♪

I miss you.

I miss you too.

- Hey, Lylah?
- Yes?

- Thank you.
- Anytime.

Nadia!

- Da?
- Prepare the plane.

- Where to, Ms. Lylah?
- Babyfoot.

[ELECTRONIC MUSIC]

♪ Oh, but dear, the sky is low watch ♪

♪ Fluent sea men rig ♪

I don't wanna do this.

I do not wanna do this, okay?

If I call Marc

and ask him where Dory is,

he's gonna think I'm, like,

begging him to take me back,

and then he'll think that he won.

Yeah, I mean, no offense,

but he did win.

I mean, he left you at the altar.

That's, like, a huge win for him.

Yeah, babe.

There is no coming back from that, sorry.

I have a TV show! I won!

Oh, you sold your soul to
the devil for that show.

- He won!
- Oh, f*ck you guys!

Like I would ever take

relationship advice from you virgins!

- [GASPS]
- Excuse you?

- Give me the phone.
- I'm not a virgin.

I lost my virginity young.

Let's get this over with.

[CELL PHONE BUZZING]

Oh, my God.

Let it ring once. Let it ring twice.

Hello?

Hey, can I speak to Marc?

This is he.

Is this Elliott?

Yeah, hey, it's Elliott!

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

What's up?

Not much.

Just bought a crib.

I'm trying to adopt a baby,

but it's a lot harder than you'd think.

Whoa, a baby?

Yeah, you know,

I'm just ready to be a dad.

Though I made the mistake on
my application of checking off

the "Do you use dr*gs recreationally?"

And then in the margin,
I just wrote "coke."

Sorry.

I think it hurt my odds.
I'm so sorry, ma'am.

Totally. That's insane.

Do you know where Dory is?

Oh, okay. I see what this is about.

Someone is jealous

that I organically infiltrated
their friend group.

Well, Dory and I don't need your permission

to hang out, okay?

It is what it is.
You need to let go of the past.

Oh... are you...
is this about the whole wedding thing?

Okay, come on. Marc, we were kids, okay?

And I'm sincerely having
trouble remembering

who left who at the altar.

No, no.

I'm just kind of worried about Dory.

She's been kind of MIA recently,

and I just wanted to
know where you saw her.

Oh, I wouldn't worry about her.

I saw her in this delicious ice cream shop

in this little town in
Massachusetts called Babyfoot.

- It's adorable.
- [MOUTHING WORDS]

It's shaped like a baby's foot.

[MOUTHING WORDS]

[LAUGHS]

Did she seem like she was
in any danger or anything?

No, not at all.

She looked really happy. Great wig.

And we had a really
incredible conversation.

She did scream,
"Dory is dead" and then run away from me,

but, you know, I think that was my fault.

I'm so weird socially... [PHONE CUTS OFF]

We're going to Babyfoot.

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

Oh, my goodness.

Call baby brother.

[LINE TRILLING]

- Hello?
- Richard.

I made it to Babyfoot,
and I'm in the house.

Chip is not.

The situation has turned sour, though.

- There's a dead body.
- Oh, the Dory girl?

Oh, uh...

No, I don't think it is the Dory girl.

This woman is old. Provincial.

Oh, and there's a room full of chains.

I don't remember them being
there when we bought the house.

Huh. Wow.

Well,
it looks like someone has been living here.

Oh, so creative.

Oh, he could have been
such a successful artist.

Well, there it is.

t*rture, captivity, m*rder most foul.

That is what they're gonna say.

And who knows what really happened?

- He's such a sweet boy.
- [INDISTINCT]

No, don't worry.
I'll take care of everything.

Damage control.

Hi, sweetheart. I have a question.

There used to be a candy
bar with a big hole in it.

It was long and thin but thick enough

for there to be a stable hole in it.

Do you remember what I'm talking about?

I've been on the hunt for it for years.

Well, I don't know. We got muffins.

We... yeah, I don't know. I'm not sure.

Is there anywhere,
maybe back there, that you...

... and I'll just track her down

and we'll pay her off.

Unless, of course, she's just thankful,

grateful for such a wonderful experience,

and then maybe she won't want anything.

Well, $ , , $ , . I don't know.

I mean,
I don't know what kind of person she is.

Hi. I want gas.

I want all the gas that you have.

That's my car right out in front,
just put it in there.

[BELL RINGS]

This is $ , .

It is, isn't it?

That's for all the gas you have.

And this is another $ ,

so that you don't tell anybody about this.

We're talking $ , now.

Yes. One and one is $ , .

And this is my friend. She's missing.

And I thought maybe you'd
seen her around town.

You know, we're very concerned about her.

[AIR HISSING]

[OBJECT CLANGS]

- We got one hour.
- What for?

To pack up our entire lives and start over.

Why? What's happening?

- My family is in town!
- Oh.

[ENGINE REVS]

[TIRES SQUEAL]

- All right, we're here.
- Oh, boy.

Okay, I'm only just now
seeing some of these comments.

"Something's off about her."

"Prayers for her." "Wow."

"Am I the only one who
finds her very strange?"

"Fester Addams with a wig."

- That's mean.
- Yeah.

And she's our friend, so...

- All right. Everybody ready?
- Yeah.

Portia, what on Earth are you doing?

Ugh, Drew.

I'm doing promotional stuff for my movie,
okay?

They're, like,
making me post this official announcement

of myself playing Dory on my social media.

Anyway, it's just, like,

showbiz stuff you wouldn't understand,
Drew... no offense.

Okay, don't talk. [LAUGHS] Okay, thank you.

Hi, everybody!

I'm so excited to share with
you an exclusive first look,

sneak peek of my
transformation as Dory Sief

in "Savage: The Dory Sief Story,"

directed by the genius Lassie Kazar,

who won a Ladypants Award for
"Einstein in Miami."

Oh, my God, right? But yeah.

So you can regard this post as
the official cast announcement

of me playing Dory Sief.

[LAUGHS]

And just to share a
little bit with you guys,

sh**ting has been going so well

and it's just been so incredible to, like,

relive my life.

And yeah, we're all basically a family.

And you guys are just always the best,

and it's such an honor being
on this journey with you, so...

[SMOOCHES] Porshe, over and out.

[CHUCKLES]

That was good.

That felt, actually, really, really good.

I'm really glad that I did that.

Mm-hmm. And they wanted you to do that?

- Uh-huh.
- Uh-huh.

- Mm-hmm.
- [CELL PHONE BUZZING]

The director's calling me.

sh*t, sh*t, sh*t. God.

You weren't supposed to do that, were you?

- No.
- Oh, God, sweetie...

But Elliott, I heard this rumor

they were gonna recast
me with Selena Gomez.

- Excuse me?
- Yeah, and so,

I was, like, freaking out,
and I just thought

I gotta get ahead of this,
and if I do something about it,

then I'll be, like,
reclaiming my destiny or something,

and now that I did it, I just feel like

that was a really bad idea.

sh*t, sh*t, sh*t. Do I delete it?

No, no, no, no, no. Do not delete it.

Do not let them control you.
Just turn your phone off.

- Turn it off.
- Okay.

- Yeah.
- Okay, let's go.

- Okay. Good?
- Yup.

Great.

- I don't believe it.
- What happened?

No, not you, Richard.
Someone slashed my tires.

[SCOFFS]

Clearly,
they're jealous of unapologetic wealth.

Hey,
I can get that fixed for you if you want.

Might take me about half hour or so.

All right. Fine, fine, fine, fine.

Just take it out of the $ , .

Okay,
now what am I gonna do for half an hour?

Well, there's a sex
museum right over there.

[FAINT POP MUSIC PLAYING]

Babe, can you please take the wig off?

It's making me uncomfortable.

Elliott, I can't take the wig off, okay?

I just tried, and it's glued and it, like,

- ripped my extensions out.
- Okay, okay.

Also the director just texted
me that it's worth $ , ,

and if I mess it up,
they're taking it out of my pay.

So don't make me feel worse about it.

Turn your phone off.

I don't wanna turn my phone off,

because people are congratulating me.

Hi.

So this is a picture of our friend,

and we just had a few questions
about where they are now.

This picture was taken here on Thursday,

so we were just wondering if was possible

to speak to someone who was
maybe working on Thursday.

Are you guys friends with Jay-Z?

I'm sorry?

I saw your New York license plates.

Do you guys know Jay-Z?

No, we don't,
but if you could please just tell us

who was working here on Thursday,
that would be great.

Yeah, that was me. I saw that girl.

Oh, cool!

Did she seem like, you know,

she might be in trouble or anything?

Like, was she alone or...

She was with some lady with,
like, an old vibe.

Like,
she had red hair with a white streak in it.

And she said they were friends.

She said it, like, a million times.

- That's so weird.
- Yeah, who...

Why would Dory be, like,
friends with an older woman?

Are you guys scared of a t*rror1st att*ck,

or is that over now?

Seriously, Richard,
I do not know what possessed me

to buy property in this surf-and-turf town.

- [INDISTINCT]
- Oh, a penny!

Oh, what a shame to let that go.

Portia, why would you give her your number?

Now she's gonna try to move in with you.

'Cause I remember what it
was like to be her age once.

You remember how this goes? Huh?

- "Find a penny, pick it up"...
- Pick it up...

"Kiss your brother till he's all grown up."

[LAUGHS]

Hmm.

Hi, there.

You're back.

I thought you hated it in here.

Well, I've never been in here in my life.

You were here with your friend on Thursday.

You were pouty.

All right, look.

I don't know what you're talking about,

but I'm choosing to be offended.

Now this young woman
is who I'm looking for.

Maybe you've seen her around town?

She might have been with a
charming young man named Chip.

Hmm?

She has a mop of brown, curly hair.

And we're very worried about both of them.

Wait, you're here looking for her?

She was just in here looking for you.

What? When? Where?

Like, two New York minutes ago.

- Where?
- Over there. Right there.

[FAINT POP MUSIC PLAYING]

You guys, can we go back and get ice cream?

[GASPS] Richard, it's the Dory girl.

Oh, my God, she's
here. sh*t, I need my car.

Go get her!

Do you guys think maybe we
should just go to the police

and ask them if they know who
the older redhead lady is?

Yeah, and if they don't know anything,

we can just drive around town all day.

It's so small.

I mean, it took us two seconds

to drive around the whole big toe.

Shut up, shut up! Red hair, white streak!

- Red hair, white streak!
- Drew, follow her!

- Go, go, go!
- Okay, okay, okay.

The Dory girl is with a group of people.

If I follow her, she may lead us to Chip.

I'm not running,
because I don't wanna look suspicious.

And also, my doctor told me to stop running

when I'm wearing heels.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

Careful, Drew. Don't spook her.

I'm stalking a woman.
I'm going one mile per hour.

Of course it's gonna look spooky.

- Just drive normal.
- If I drive normal,

I'm gonna pass her!

God, Drew! Well, then do something else

so it just, like, makes it seem normal.

What else could I be doing?
I'm driving the car.

Just pretend like you're
brushing your teeth.

- Do we have a toothbrush?
- Brush your teeth!

Why would I be brushing my teeth?

- Brush your teeth!
- I'm not...

Hurry, hurry, hurry. All right.

Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, cease, cease.

No, don't put in any more.
Don't... close it!

I've gotta go. I'll come back for the rest.

- Okay.
- Oh.

Just act normal. Just be cool.

♪ ♪

They just pulled in to get gas.

I am in the perfect
position to follow them.

Oh, boy.

When they pull out,
I'll be right on their tail.

Why won't she pull out?

My God, when's she gonna go?

[HUFFS]

What is she doing?

All right, I'm just gonna pull
up and wait for her there.

That's smart.

Yeah... ooh.

Let the chase begin!

Oh, so now she's pulling out?

♪ ♪

[TIRES SQUEAL]

Look, look, look!
A roundabout! That's perfect.

We'll loop around and take her exit.

Okay, here we go.

What the hell is happening?
Why won't she pick an exit?

I don't know.

Well, maybe she's lost or confused.

Richard, you won't believe this.

They're going around in circles.

They must be lost or confused.

♪ ♪

No!

- Pick an exit!
- What is wrong with her?

Does she have, like, dementia?

- Portia, careful.
- What? Is that offensive?

- Yeah.
- Just pick an exit!

Pick an exit!

What are they doing?

These kids, they don't know how to drive.

They don't know how to exit.

BOTH: Go!

- Go!
- Take that one!

Oh, my God!

- Or that one!
- Just... I don't like...

- Pick a hole, any hole!
Go through the hole!

I'm starting to get upset!

Ah.

Come on. Oh, oh.

Oh, they're up to something.

- [SIGHS]
- This is so weird.

What is happening?

They think they're gonna lose me,
they're crazy.

I'm on 'em. I'm on 'em.

- I think she's chasing us now.
- Oh, God, she is cha...

She's actually getting fast...
Is she chasing me?

- Oh, God.
- Oh, okay.

- Yeah, you wanna chase me?
- sh*t, no, no, no.

God, this is fast. Oh, God!

Things are heating up now, Richard.

I'm on this. I got it.

[TIRES SQUEALING]

♪ ♪

What in the world is going on?

It's two cars.

They seem to be having some
kind of trouble exiting.

- Get off our ass.
- Yeah, and stop, lady!

Ugh, I hate people!

- Wait, wait.
- What?

It's Dory! BOTH: What?

- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God, oh, my God!

[METAL CRUNCHES, ALL GRUNT]

That wasn't my fault.
That was not my fault.

- Oh, my God!
- What the hell was that?

Oh, God. Oh, God.

The twink!

No.

Oh, sh*t.

- No, no, no, not them.
- It's okay.

- Not them, not them, no!
- Wait, Stephanie.

Stephanie, wait!

I'm stuck, Stephanie! Wait!

Dory, wait, it's okay! It's us!

She's running away! What do we do?

Oh, I don't know! Just run after her!

- [SCREAMS]
- Well, I just...

f*cking find us, Drew! I don't know!

[SCREAMS]

[TIRES SQUEAL]

[GRUNTS]

What is she doing... [INDISTINCT]

[BOTH PANTING]

I won't let you ruin my life again!

What are you talking about?
We're your friends!

Dory, stop running!

[TENSE MUSIC]

We're trying to save you, babe!

Stephanie, wait!

Young man, what are you doing in my Chanel?

Richard, I'm putting you on hold.

No! Wait, Stephanie!

I'm stuck! [GRUNTS]

You stop screaming.

Stop screaming, and you'll get out.

- Stephanie!
- Take a breath.

[YELLS] I'm stuck! It's stuck! It's stuck!

Such a lemon, this car,

just like everything else in this town.

I don't even know how I
got in possession of this.

It was probably a gift
from one of my lovers,

one of my many lovers.

Stephanie!

Dory! You should be thrilled!

[SCREAMS]

- What the...
- No!

[PANTING]

Oh, no! Oh, sh*t!

[YELLS] Let me go!

- Drew, Drew, pop the trunk!
- Let me go!

[BOTH SCREAMING]

Drew, she is feral and in a wig!

- Come on, Portia, help her!
- I'm trying!

- No, no, no, no!
- Ow!

Not in the car! Not in the car!

- Ow!
- sh*t!

[ALL YELLING AT ONCE]

- Dory...
- sh*t! No! No!

- Oh, my God. Okay.
- No!

- Let me go!
- Stop! Stop!

- Let's go, go, go, go.
- Is she gonna die in there?

- I don't know.
- Can she breathe?

Oh, sh*t.

We love you, Dory!

Okay. Okay. Let's go.

♪ ♪

Sweetheart, I know what we're gonna do.

Just calm down, don't move,

and I'm gonna cut you out of it.

I'm sure that I have

my cocktail scissors in here somewhere.

No!

It's too late! We're too late!

Oh!

I hate you, you evil witch!

Don't you talk to your mother like that.

[EXHALES SOFTLY]

M...

my mother?

Did I say that?

Well, I...
this was never supposed to happen.

You're...

you're my Aunt Lylah.

I am.

And I'm also your mother.

Your mummy. I'm your auntie and your mummy.

And that can be a good thing,
because, you know,

it's not everyone that
gets to be both things,

and I can be both things to a child.

No, no, no, no, no!

I knew there was something
you all were hiding from me!

All those whispers! Oh, my God!

This is why no one wants to be my friend!

Because I'm a freak! I'm a little freak!!

[CRYING]

- Richard, he knows.
- Christ.

[SCREAMING]

Stop, Dory! Please, stop screaming.

Please, I'm begging you!

I'm begging you! It's getting so old!

Okay. Dory. Dory.

Dory, if you stop screaming,
we'll take the tape off.

- Yes.
- If you stop screaming,

we'll take the tape off.

- Good idea. Yes.
- Okay, I'm going in.

Thank you. Thank you for stopping.

- Good girl, good girl.
- Thank you for stopping.

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- Yay, good job.

- Okay, wow.
- Help!

Chip!

Help!

- Chip!
- Dory! Dory, stop!

Look at my eyes, Dory. It's me.

It's us. We're your friends.

You're not my friends!

And you never have been.

Ugh! You ruined my life!

And my name is Stephanie! It's not Dory!

I hate you all so much!

You don't want what's best for me.

You're just a bunch of self-obsessed,

narcissistic sociopaths!

[LAUGHS] Okay, fascinating,

coming from you, of all people.

- [SCREAMING]
- Dory!

Wake up, okay?

Wake up, Dory! It's me!

I'm Portia! I'm your best friend!

I am a good friend and
you are a bad friend, okay?

Yeah, we came here to save you!

- Yes!
- You stubborn idiot!

Every time we try to help you,
our lives get worse!

We would be happy if it wasn't for you!

And you know what else? You know what else?

Uh, Stephanie is a bad name!

It's a stupid name, Dory!

[PANTS]

[GROWLING]

[GRUNTING]

I mean, did you see her eyes?

There was nothing, nothing.
It was just rage.

I think she's gone.

What do we do?

She's been brainwashed or something.

We're not equipped to handle this.

You guys, we can't give up, okay?

Seriously.

If we give up, she could k*ll us,

and we know what she's capable of.

Let me try something.

[SHOUTING]

[PANTING]

Hey.

I'm gonna take the tape off.

Okay?

[GASPS, PANTS]

Just me and you.

Just Dory and Drew.

[SIGHS]

We have been through a lot together.

I feel like you know me
better than anyone else.

And I kinda feel like I'm the only person

who really knows who you are.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that...

I think that you're still in there.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

The girl that I fell in
love with is still in there.

♪ ♪

I can see her so clearly.

I know she didn't slip away.

Please come back, Dory.

Please come back.

[SPITS]

I'll k*ll you.

I'll k*ll all of you.

Chip is gonna save me,
and then we'll both k*ll you

for what you've done to us!

Chip, help! Help!

Nope, nope, nope, nope.

I refuse to keep listening

to her moaning and screaming

like she's giving birth to a devil baby.

I'm turning up this TV,
I will not listen to this.

La-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la-la.

Overnight, flurries will increase

with a total accumulations of three inches.

[YELLING]

... with a high of .

It's currently degrees.

[DYNAMIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Are these the last days
of Charlie Reeny's life?

Find out on our live -hour feed

into her hospital room that will document

every upsetting second
of her gradual demise.

[MUFFLED SCREAM]

[SIGHS]

- This is so weird.
- I know.

I hate it.

Drewby, come here.

[MELANCHOLY MUSIC]

♪ ♪

I think we lost her.

♪ ♪

[COUGHS]