05x18 - The Rehabilitation of Otis

[bunniefuu]

Starring Andy Griffith...

With Ronny Howard...

Also starring Don knotts.

Amazing.

Absolutely amazing.

It's just plain
out-and-out amazing

and that's all there is to it.

Most amazing thing I ever read.

It's just...

Okay, Barn, what's amazing?

Well, did you know that the size
of a horse's eyes

are the same at birth as they
are when he's fully grown?

Good.

Well, ain't that amazing?

Yeah.

Well, now, here's something
that's really amazing.

Did you know that there are
more stars in the heavens

then there are grains of sand

on all the beaches
in the whole world?

What are you reading, anyway?

It's a new magazine
I subscribe to.

It's called learn a month.

See, each month they send you
a new magazine

on a different subject.

Like one month
it could be on medicine.

Another month
it could be on science.

Another month on insect life.

Hm. What's this month?

"Odd facts known by few."

Hm. You want to read it
to yourself?

Well, sure.

What's that?

I don't know.

Otis!

Hi, Andy.

Hello, Barney.

All right.
Everybody go on home.

Go on home.

Go on back
to what you was doing.

We'll take care of it.
Now, run on.

We'll tend to it now.

Otis, what in the
world are you doing?

I just got back
from old man Davis' place.

He sold me this
entire horse for $ .

Otis, I don't reckon
you've noticed,

but you got a horse
that gives milk.

Huh?

I knew he was a good buy.

Come on, Otis.

Come on. Get down.

Get off. Come on.

Whoa, paint.

Hold it, partner.
Hold it.

In this country,

a man takes care
of his horse first.

Barney will take care of him.

Yeah.
I'll tie her up out in back.

Back in the old corral.

Going to bed, Otis?

How do you expect a man to go
to bed when he's got the...

...hiccups?

Stand right there,
and I'll get you some water.

Mm. Water.

Oh, I don't know.

I'll get sick
if I mix my drinks.

Here you are, Otis.
Drink.

Here's to you.

Okay.
They're gone.

Okay.
Going to bed.

I'll... I'll try and catch
a few winks.

Don't forget to wake me up
in time for the roundup.

Did you tie her up?

Yeah.

I don't believe
I've ever seen him this bad.

He's really boiled.

Yeah.

Well, he'll sleep it off.

Ange?

Hmm?

Andy, Otis needs help.

What?
He needs professional help.

Psychological therapy.

We don't have a psychiatrist
around here.

I know. That's why I'm prepared
to offer my services.

What?

Now, you know that
learn a month magazine

I subscribe to?

Well, the last issue
was on psychology.

Barney, don't do that.

All right, all right.
Why not?

Because you're not qualified,
that's why.

Just because you read
a -cent magazine...

Quarter.

Well, that doesn't give you

the license to tamper
with a man's mind.

Andy, if just for once

you wouldn't jump
to conclusions.

Now, this issue was full

of standard psychological tests.

Any layman can give 'em.

Well, you're going to do it,
no matter what I say.

Then, don't worry about it.

Come here.
I'll show you something.

What do you see there?

Otis sleeping.

I see more than that.

Inside that man's body
is a little child

calling out for help.

"Help me! Help me!"
He's saying.

I want to answer that call.

Uh-huh.

Look at him, Andy.

Just imagine
the tortured thoughts

going through that fevered mind

tormenting that poor man.

Must be the tortured,
tormented little child laughing,

huh, Barn?

Hi, Otis.

It's time to get up.

Come on. Come on.
Up, up, up, up, up.

Oh, don't do that.

Come on. Come on.

You'll feel better
once you're up.

Oh, Barney.

Come on.
There we go.

Oh, my head.
My head.

Hmm?

Otis.

What?

You need help.

Just get me up on my feet.
I'll take it from there.

No, I'm not talking about
that kind of help.

Now, Otis, I got something
I want to discuss with you.

All right. sh**t.

Yesterday I had
the shocking experience

of seeing you riding a cow.

You saw me riding a cow?

That's right.

Barney, I didn't think
you touched the stuff.

You were riding the cow.
Ask Andy.

Where'd I get it?

From old man Davis, you said.
You thought it was a horse.

Slipped one over on me, huh?

You can't trust anybody.

We're going to try to help you

get to the root of your problem,

find out why you drink
the way you do.

What are you going to do?

We're going to try
a little psychology.

Going to get inside of you.

We're going to take
a look at that ID, that ego,

and we're going to check out
that superego.

Oh, Barn.

Come on, Otis.
This is important.

Okay, but make it fast.

All right.

Now, the purpose
of this exploratory session

is to establish a relationship

between the therapist
and the therapee.

Will you get to the point, Barn?

First you got to take
this simple test.

Now, this is
the well-known inkblot test.

Now, I'm going to show you
this design,

and I want you to tell me
what it looks like.

Let me see it.

All right.
Not so fast.

I just want you to tell me
the first thing

that comes into your mind.

Just say anything
you think of, okay?

Okay.

All right. You ready?

Yeah.

That's a bat.

Wrong.

Wrong, wrong, wrong,
wrong, wrong, wrong.

Any normal person
can see that's a butterfly.

Butterfly, huh?
If it is, it's a mean one.

There's your evidence.

I shudder to think what you
just revealed about yourself.

What is it

you see ugly things.

I see butterflies,

and you see bats.
So?

Wouldn't you rather see
butterflies than bats?

No. Once in a while,
I like to see a bat.

Well, that's your problem
right there.

You prefer bats to butterflies.

Do you mind?
Yes, I do.

And another thing...

The therapee don't talk back
to the therapist

so just pipe down.

You gonna make me?!

Yeah!
Yeah?

Yeah!
Yeah?

Yeah!
Yeah?

Hold it! Hold it! Hold it!
What's going on?

I was just giving him
his test, Andy.

Andy, can I go now?
I took the test.

Yeah, you might as well go.
I've seen enough.

You may not know it, Otis,

but you were standing
naked before me.

I was not, Andy.

Okay, Otis.

I'll be seeing you.

Just a minute, Otis.

What?

As part of your treatment,

I want you to take this.

Keep it with you at all times.

What is it?

My home phone.

Now, whenever you get
an urge to drink

you call me... night or day.

Whenever you get
that temptation,

you call me... understand?

What for, Barn?

It's apparent to me now
you can't handle this alone.

So just call me,
and don't worry.

It'll be between you and me.

You got a three-party line.

Never mind about that.

When you get the urge, call me.

Okay.

Bye, Andy.

I'll see you, Otis.

How'd the test go?

Boy, what I found out about him.

Yeah?

Look at that.

Got it all from that
little inkblot test.

No kidding?
Yeah.

I've heard about these.

That's a good one.

Looks like a bat.

Fife here.

Oh. Oh, Otis.

Yeah. Yeah, good.

No.
No, don't worry about it.

You did right.

You got a strong one, huh?

Well, try to hang on.

Where are you?

Well, you just stay right there.
I'll be right down.

No, no, it's no bother.

No. Good boy, Otis.

Hello.

Yeah, Barney.

Talk a little slower.

I can't understand you.

Well, can't you talk to him
by yourself?

But, Andy, we got to get Otis
through this crisis.

He's going to need
a lot of talking to.

I'm fixing to go to bed.
I'm tired.

Andy, just this once.
It's worth a try, ain't it?

Well, I suppose,
since you got him this far.

Okay, all right.

You sure he called
from the Johnson place?

Yeah.

There's a wild party
going on in there.

Yeah.

Giddyap, old paint!

Hey, old paint!
Giddyap, old paint!

Was he sober when he called you?

He sounded it.

Giddyap, old paint.
Hey!

All right, Otis,
get down from there.

He's fast, ain't he?

Hold a clock on him, will you?

All right, Otis!

We're taking you in!

Nothing doing.

I don't feel like
looking at your old bat.

Will you get down off of there
before you hurt yourself?

Let me handle him.

All right, Otis!
Down!

What are you so mad about,
Barney?

I called you, didn't I?
Like I promised?

I crawled right over
to the phone and called you.

You were supposed to call
before you drink, not after.

You didn't make that clear.

Come on.
You're under arrest.

Get down.
Come on.

Under arrest?!

That's right.

Wait a minute, Barney.

I've never been arrested
in my life.

We're wasting time.
Come on.

Take your hands off of me.

Resisting arrest, huh?

Well, we'll just see about that.

Barney, you don't have
to use handcuffs on him.

Andy, this man is drunk
and disorderly.

He's been violating
municipal code b,

and he's under arrest!

I've never been arrested
in my life!

You'll be sorry, Barney!
You'll be sorry!

Well, he's still asleep.

Much obliged.

When he wakes up,

I sure hope he don't
remember them handcuffs.

And I still say I think you were
a little rough on him.

Andy, that's because you
still don't understand

the psychological approach!

If you'll just read
that magazine,

you'll see that
when a person is dominated

during a period of therapy

it gives them
a sense of security.

He didn't seem secure to me.
He seemed awful mad.

That's just
a temporary reaction.

It's typical
of inhibition syndrome.

Oh. I didn't know that.

When he wakes up,
he'll be a different person.

He'll be pleading for every
comfort I can give him,

like a child.

Let me out of here!

Bring you some coffee, Otis!

I don't want no coffee!
I don't want nothin'!

I just want out!

Take it easy, Otis.

Barney's just trying to help.

I don't want nothin' from him.

I never been so insulted
in all my born days.

Arrested... me arrested.

Now, Otis, you were acting up.

I ain't talkin' to you.

Well, do I get to go, Andy,
or not?

All right, Otis.

I guess you can go.

I can't go far enough.

I ain't never comin' back
to this jail again... ever.

Ever!

Well...

Looks like you kind of got

your syndromes mixed up, huh?

Hi, Floyd.

Floyd.

Oh! Hello,
Barn, Andy.

Floyd, have you seen anything
of Otis lately?

Not since yesterday morning.
Said he was leaving town.

Leaving town?
Mm-hmm.

He came in for a shave...
Twice over, too.

That means he'd be away
for quite a while.

Didn't he say
where he was going?

Oh, he told me just where
he was going.

He and I are very close...

For years, just like brothers.

You know that, don't you, Andy?

Yeah.
He said where he was going?

It's only natural he would.

We were great pals.

Floyd...

I was just like
a big brother to him.

Only last week,

I was taking him a-home
and he fell down a well.

He thought he was in quicksand.

I got him up, though.

Floyd, where did he go?

Oh, he went right home.
After all, he was soakin' wet.

Boy, you fall down a well...
And you're wet.

What about yesterday?

Uh, well, he came in
for a shave.

Floyd, you told us that.

And he said he was
leaving for...

Where was that, now?

Was it siler city?
He's got people up there.

No, not siler city.

Bridgeton?

Bridgeton!

Bridgeton! Uh...
No, not bridgeton.

Floyd, this is important.
Will you please concentrate?

Oh, you bet I will.

Let me see...
Hmm...

Was it Raleigh?

Oh, no.
He wouldn't go to Raleigh.

Do you know what they charge
for things in those big cities?

Yeah, Floyd... a arm and a leg.

An arm and a...
Oh! Isn't that funny?

I want to remember that.

You hear that on TV?

Was it by any chance
mt. Pilot?

Ah!
That's it.

Mt. Pilot... that's where
he said he was going.

I knew I'd get it.

Thanks, Floyd.
Thanks, Floyd.

Oh, Barn!

If you find him, will you
tell him to pop back

every couple of weeks?

I don't want him falling
in the hands

of a strange barber.

Uh-huh.

Checked in last night, huh?

Okay.
Thanks, sheriff.

Bye.

He's in mt. Pilot?

Yep. Told sheriff
Williams from now on

he was going to throw all his
business to their jail.

I'm afraid of that
mt. Pilot jail, Andy.

They're liable to throw Otis
in that t*nk with riffraff.

We ought to get him back here
for his own good.

Why don't you go over there
and see what you can do?

You come with me.
He may not even speak to me.

Well, all right.

You ever do any drinkin'

in the Southern part
of the state?

No. Mostly a little
farther north up there.

Boy, some of them tanks
downstate are really bad.

This one I was in was right next
to an all-night garage.

You couldn't sleep at all.

Bad, huh?

Well, I complained.

I told them, I said,
"you people are a hundred years

behind the times
in penology."

What'd they say?
What could they say?

I just won't drink
in that town anymore.

Hi, Otis.

Oh, hi, Andy.

What you doin' here?

Came to see you.

Hi, Otis.

Otis, that isn't very nice.

Barney came all the way
over here to see you.

I don't aim to be
friendly with nobody

who slaps handcuffs on me.

I'm sorry about that, Otis.
I just lost my head.

What's done is done.

Otis, sheriff Williams
says we can take you

back to Mayberry.

What makes you think
I want to go back?

Hey, what's going on?

Why do they want
to take you back?

This is Luke.

Hi.
How you doin'?

Why do you want to take me back?

Otis, please come
back to Mayberry.

It's where you belong.

It's where you have friends
that care about you.

It's where you won't
be thrown in with the...

Wrong sort of people.

I resent that, mister.

I come from a good family.
My mother was a nurse!

I'm sorry.

Well, Otis, you want
to come back or not?

Oh, I don't know.

No more of that
psychology stuff?

Oh, no, no, Otis.
That's all out.

You can come and go
as you please...

Just like it always was.

I even got
your robe cleaned for you.

Well, I don't know.

Hey, Otis...

Hmm?

Over here.

You got something
going for you there.

Yeah, they run
a pretty nice jail.

Why don't you play it
for what it's worth?

I'll bet you could get
anything you want, like...

Breakfast in bed.

I already got that.
You do?

Sure.

Well, what do you say, Otis?

You want to come back or not?

Well...

I got to think about it.

You can't just make decisions
like that.

I don't trust my own judgment
when I'm sober.

Let's go, Barn.

Wait a minute, ange.

Otis, come on back with us.

The man says he can't
think straight when he's sober.

Stay out of this!
Don't you yell at my friend!

Hold it!

Now, Otis, you want to come
back, come back.

You don't want to come back,
don't come back.

I've had it.

Let's go.

Nice going, Andy.
Now he'll never come back.

Ange?

Yeah?

You think he's comin' back?

Well, if he comes, he comes.

We were more than fair with him.

Oh, I don't know.

I think if he was coming back,
he would have been here by now.

He ain't comin' back.

Well, Barn,
if he comes, he comes.

But I hope you won't be
too disappointed if he doesn't.

I don't mind telling you
I miss him.

I really miss him.

Well...

I do, too, I guess.

What do you think
we ought to do with this?

Box it up and send it to him
in mt. Pilot?

Well, I guess we could.

Put some cigarettes in it?

Yeah.

It's a good color for Otis.

He always looked good in blue.

You know, ange...

Otis had a lot of problems,

and he's weak in a lot of ways,

but...

Well, we've known him
for a good many years,

and it's just kind of sad
when you...

When you realize that we're...

Not gonna be seeing
this old friend.

Andy, do you think that it...

Yeah, I think it is.

Welcome home, Otis!

Food and water
for my men and horses!

He sure looks happy, don't he?

Yeah.

Well, I guess he's glad
to be home.

His own bed and everything.

Yeah.

Sheriff, I'm turnin' myself in.

What?
Who are you?

Luke.

Don't you remember?

I met you fellas at mt. Pilot
when you come up to visit Otis.

What do you want?

Well, I've had one too many.

You do lock up drunks,
don't you?

Well, yeah.
Well, okay.

Okay, fellas.
It's okay. Come on.

Come on. This is the best deal
you'll ever find.

I promise you that.
Look at that, will you?

Look at those bars.
You never saw anything like it.

And these are two of the nicest
fellas you'll ever see.

And lookit there.
Flowers and...

What's going on?

You brought all these men
over here from mt. Pilot?

Well, yeah, sheriff.

I've been talking your jail up
all over the county.

All right, men. Give me
your orders for breakfast.

How many eggs?
Scrambled

and one poached.
Everybody gets...