01x04 - Fun and Games

[bunniefuu]

Yeah, we lost them at Third and Shuster.

They were heading
for the warehouse district.

- Yeah.
- Put her there.

- All right.
- Nice going.

We scored bigtime.

Hello, boys.

Who's that?

I'm ever so sorry to spoil
your nice celebration...

...but I have a very important message
for your boss, Mr. Mannheim.

Please tell him the Toyman
is calling time-out on his little games...

...and don't be tardy.

Grab Pinocchio before he gets out.

Hey, come here.
Come back here.

Johnny.

- Let's get out of here.
- We can't, Spider, it's locked.

Get back in the car.

- When's it gonna stop?
- Don't worry. These walls are solid steel.

We're gonna die.

- Somebody, help!
- Help!

- Help! Get help.
- We're gonna get greased.

Hey, it stopped.

We're safe.

- Hey, watch it.
- What's going on?

It was... It was Toyman.

Calling time-out.

Tell Bruno, the Toyman.

What a smashup.

Odd thing. I heard it was parked
at the time.

Where, at a monster truck rally?

Look on the bright side.
At least you look good in silver.

Miss Lane, excuse me
if I don't shake hands.

So, what's the lowdown
on this Toyman character?

I hear he's got it in for your boss,
Bruno Mannheim.

What boss? I happen to be
a independent agent.

You're wasting your time, doll face.
I'll see you in two to five.

Where to now, Miss Lane, the Planet?

Actually, I was thinking
about a picnic in the park.

Testing, one, two, three.
Testing, one, two, three.

Is this on? And it is my honor
to dedicate Mannheim Park...

...to the true heroes of Metropolis,
our children.

Sounds good, Mr. Mannheim.

Enjoying a leisurely afternoon...

...or have you been listening
to the police band again?

Perry assigned me the park opening.
Why, what's up?

- You haven't heard about the Toyman?
- Who?

Nice try, Smallville,
but this one's mine.

Mr. Mannheim, Lois Lane, Daily Planet.

Any comments on this morning's
armored-car hijacking?

Why would I have a comment?
I'm a legitimate businessman.

Of course. And you have no knowledge
of someone calling himself the Toyman?

I have no idea what you're talking about.

I'm a respected citizen, and I don't
appreciate your little insinuations.

Look out!

I see a page-one photo.

Look out! They're coming back.

They're heading this way.

Wait.

You wanna get k*lled too?

What happened?

Looks like it just broke apart.

Get me out of here.

Read it and weep, Kent. It's all here.

The att*cks on the armored car
and Mannheim, and as a finishing touch...

...a preliminary profile on the perp
by a noted police psychiatrist.

- Based on what?
- He uses toys as weapons.

We're talking about a guy
with very serious issues.

Like the shrink says:

"An emotionally stunted amoral narcissist
with paranoid delusions..."

"Desperately seeking external validation
through antisocial behavior."

That creep made me into a laughingstock.
How could you let him get so close?

You wouldn't let us in the park,
boss, remember?

You was afraid we'd scare the kids.

He's out there somewhere,
the slimy, little weasel.

Thinks he's gonna make me pay.

What?

What are you waiting for? sh**t it.

- It's a big ducky.
- sh**t it!

Get out of here.

How does the saying go?

"Bubble, bubble,
toil and trouble."

Yeah, it's you, Winslow.
Same creepy voice.

I don't know how you came back from
the dead, but it's gonna be a short visit.

Ashes, ashes, we all fall down

Yeah. Mannheim's still missing, chief.

Dinner's here, bye.

Let it be flowers, please.

Hello, I'm Princess Nighty-Night.

Nighty-night.

Oh, Miss Lane?

Oh, Miss Lane?

Oh, Miss Lane?

Can you come out and play?

Still haven't heard from her?

- You think something's wrong?
- I don't know.

First Mannheim's missing, now Lois.

If I only knew what the link was
between Mannheim and Toyman.

You can cross-index with this system...

...like "Mannheim" and "Toyman."
Mind if I take a sh*t?

I'm so glad you decided to stay, Miss Lane.
We're going to have a whole lot of fun.

Why me, Toyman?

Because of those lies you wrote
about me in your little paper.

This time, I want you to get it right.

- Nothing yet.
- Try "Mannheim" with just "toy."

Toymaker Sentenced
to Ten Years

Hey, look at this.

"Toymaker sentenced to years."

It's a very sad story,
one most people have forgotten.

Once upon a time...

...there was a kindly man who
loved nothing more than making toys.

He wanted to build the most wonderful
toy factory in all the world.

Only he had no money to pay for it.

Then one day, a man came along.

A very bad man.

He offered to pay for the factory
under one condition.

"The factory became
a numbers racket front.

Bruno Mannheim was named as a suspect,
but was never indicted.

Only the toymaker, Winslow Schott,
was convicted."

Sounds like Bruno played him
for a patsy.

The bad man watched and laughed...

...while the police locked
the kindly toymaker in the dungeon forever.

- , Schott's our Toyman.

I don't think so, Clark. Take a look.

- His obituary.
- Poor guy. He d*ed before making parole.

Yeah, but he had a survivor.

That's right, Miss Lane.
The toymaker had a son.

But without his father...

...the poor little boy was bounced
from foster home to foster home...

...like a little toy
that nobody wanted.

A childhood is a terrible thing
to lose, Miss Lane.

But I'm getting mine back.

With a vengeance.

Now the real fun begins.

You're going to play...

...reporter.

This time, I want you
to take good notes.

You just made the biggest mistake
of your life, you miserable little freak.

I mean it, Schott. I got friends.

They'll find you.

On the other hand,
maybe we can make a deal.

- No peeking now.
- Please, don't.

- You can't be serious.
- Deadly serious, Miss Lane.

Playtime is over. Ready.

Aim.

Hey.

You broke my toys.

You spoiled my fun.

Little boys shouldn't play
with sharp objects.

Who invited you, Superman?

Superman? Superman, is that you?

Don't think I haven't prepared
a surprise for you.

Here's something you can't break.

Very funny, Toyman.

Maybe you should read the warning.

Dopey Doh is a lethal biogenic organism.

Contact with the skin can prove fatal.

It won't stop growing until
it asphyxiates its host.

- Not for children under .
- Lois, no. Don't touch it.

- What can I do?
- Get back.

Find something to hide behind. Hurry.

My playhouse!

Cheater.

You think you've got me,
but I still get a free game.

- You sure you're okay?
- Yeah.

He was a sicko, Kent,
but I can't help feeling sorry for him.

He was a loser, a walking freak show,
like his old man.

- This is one funeral I'll skip.
- I'm not sure there's gonna be a funeral.

My people still haven't found the body.
However, they did find this.