01x09 - Guilt Tripping

[bunniefuu]

Grrr!

There's nothing
like a lazy day on the beach.

[sighs]

It's nice to breathe in that
beautiful salt-water air and relax.

For the first time
I feel totally stress-free.

-[Tails] Hey, guys!
-Agh!

I just perfected
my most brilliant invention yet.

Meet UT,
the Universal Translator.

Designed to translate
any language into our own.

Allow me to demonstrate.

[tweeting]

The fact that you pre-chew
my food is repulsive.

Hey, it works!

Didn't see that one coming.

Um... it's still talking.

I thought this thing
just translated birds.

Since what you're saying
doesn't need to be translated,

UT is translating it
into what you really mean.

I didn't intend for it do that,

but I will gladly accept
full credit.

-That's great, Tails.
-Pretty lame.

That's not what
I was thinking at all.

Man, I am totally busted.

Tails, I think it needs
some more work.

If that thing doesn't shut its
metal trap I think I might die.

Wait. This thing reads minds?

Wait, this thing reads minds.

Get it out of my head!

Get it out of my head.

Now, now. Calm down, Sticks.

Take it easy, whack job.

-Hey!
-I am displeased.

Don't be offended, Sticks.

Knuckles didn't mean
to think that.

He's not the sharpest tool
in the shed.

Grrr!

Tails, I think it's best
if you shut that thing off.

We don't want it to reveal
anything too sensitive.

Shut that thing off before
it tells Sonic that I lov--

Uh, what was he saying?

Nothing. Nothing important.
[giggles]

[Eggman] Very interesting.

It seems Tails' new invention
is causing friction

between Sonic and his friends.

They're not
getting along either.

This gives me an idea.

If I build a duplicate robot
to replace the original,

I could have it say
whatever I want.

They'll be at each other's
throats in no time,

and with the group divided

I can destroy them
once and for all.

-Heh-heh-heh-ha-ha-ha!
-[robots] Ha-ha-ha!

Don't laugh. You're ruining it.

Wow, UT, my friends normally
love my inventions.

I can't believe
you had such a lousy debut.

I blame myself.

No, no, if it's anyone's fault
it's mine.

After all, I'm the one who--

Oh, wait. You were just saying
my thoughts, huh?

I feel like such a dummy.

Things'll go better tomorrow,
I promise. Good night, UT.

[yawns]

[snores]

[sighs and snores]

OK, I know things got off on the
wrong foot yesterday but I--

Tails, I think it would be best
if you turned UT off.

Amy Rose is a big dope.

Oh, so now that's what
you're thinking?

What? No! Not even close.

And her hair stinks.
What does she shampoo with?

Yogurt from the back
of the fridge?

Why would you even say that?

But I didn't say that, he did.

Sure, you didn't.

I'm stupid.

Hey, I'm not stupid.

And um... I'm ugly too.

-But not as ugly as Sticks.
-Hey!

-Gah!
-What? Ow! Get off of me!

Heh-heh!
Now, this is going nicely.

Dr Eggman is a genius.

Hey, I like your style.

You're the only one
who understands me.

I think we've seen
enough of this.

Let's turn off the monitors and
focus on praising Dr Eggman.

Sonic the Hedgehog,

I can't believe
you'd think those things.

So now you're gonna trust

some bucket of bolts over me?

So, wait? Who called me stupid?
I called me stupid?

Don't you see?
This is what it wants us to do.

The robo-apocalypse is nigh!

After everything I do for you.
You don't appreciate me.

[Amy] Why am I even here?

I know my friends
wouldn't think

such horrible thoughts
about each other.

Maybe UT's malfunctioning.

What the heck? I didn't install
a remote speaker.

[Sonic and friends arguing]

You guys!
Stop! We've been duped.

Eggman swiped UT and
replaced him with this impostor.

We gotta save the real UT.

Don't you guys
wanna get UT back?

Thing is, bud,
that robot of yours

just makes us fight
all the time.

It's evil, I tell you!

Fine, I see how it is.
I'll go get him back myself.

Would you like
another slice of cake?

What a beautiful cake.
I hope no one sits on it.

Eggman!

Landing in that cake
really hurt my credibility.

Not now, UT.

-Give me back my robot.
-Or what?

That's a fair question.

Where's that blue loser
and the rest of your friends?

I'm here alone.

I came to negotiate
the release of my robot UT.

Negotiate? Usually we just
battle till the losing party...

sometimes you, sometimes me,
it's about a - split...

retreats to his lair.

Let's pretend that's true
and that you don't always lose.

In exchange
for my robot's safe return,

I'll offer my services
as your lab assistant.

Intriguing.

With two mechanical geniuses
under one roof,

I'd raise my win ratio
well above the - mark

that we agreed was accurate.

Then it's a deal?

I'll have Orbot
draw up a contract.

This will be delicious,

having one of Sonic's friends
helping me

build the tools
that will destroy him.

It's ripe with irony,
Your Evilness.

Sonic won't know what hit him.

But the moment Sonic realises
you're missing,

he'll come bursting
through that door

with that circus troupe
he calls friends

and put a damper
on all the fun.

I've thought of that.

Since you're letting UT go,

I'll just send
a message along with him.

-Good thinking, Number .
-I thought I was Number .

Please. I'd need a computer

to figure out where you fall
in the pecking order.

Fortunately I have one here.

.

Hey, g*ng. It's Tails.

I'm going to be staying
with Eggman.

No need to rescue me,
I'm % safe and happy.

Hey, here comes
Tails' missing robot.

We found him!

When you see Tails,

tell him we looked everywhere
for a long time.

Or we could recycle it and take
a blood oath never to tell.

What? Just spitballin' here.

[Bleeping]

Hey, g*ng. It's Tails.

I'm going to be staying
with Eggman.

No need to rescue me,
I'm % safe and happy.

I snuck into Eggman's lair
to save my robot.

It was awesome.
You should have seen me.

But I need you
to come rescue me now.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Wow, UT really came in handy.

Maybe it's not as dumb
an invention as we thought.

Yeah, but we should still
smash it... just to be safe.

No time for that now.
We gotta go save Tails.

Tails, be a doll

and plug my drill
into that outlet over there.

Uh... that doesn't look
very safe.

That's why I'm having you do it.

-[gulp!]
-It's nice having an assistant.

[robot sounds]

We're here to save our friend
from your evil clutches.

Wait. What?
No, Tails and I have a contract.

Here's the lab assistant
contract, ready to be signed.

Ha!

Fine! Lucky thing
I always have a plan B.

[Sonic] Amy, look out!

That was close.

I care about your well-being.

Aww!

Ugh! Urrgh! Man!

Rrrragh!

Go!

Heh-heh-heh!

Tails, deploy the photon bombs.

Oh, right.

Sticks, set Knuckles up.

No! Gah!

Thanks for the rescue, guys.

Hey, we couldn't have done it
without UT.

I think we'll be going
on lots more adventures with UT.

I agree.

I'm going to destroy
that stupid robot.

Ugh! Gah!

Sorry, Tails. Had to be done.