01x15 - Aim Low

[bunniefuu]

Grrr!

[Eggman] Junk. [shredder]

Junk. [shredder]

Junk. [shredder]

Junk. [shredder]

Evil Boot Warehouse.

Paper jam.

Orbot!

No, you imbecile,
I don't want to shred this!

It's the key to our future!

-Do you know what it this is?
-Robotic women

who love us for our minds
and aren't into looks or money?

No. Our home,
and by that I mean my home,

is going to be featured
in Modern Lair Magazine!

Here. Read the exposition.

"A photographer's assistant will
do a site inspection tomorrow

to consider you for
our 'Island Fortress' issue!"

Let's give this lair some flair!

When you bots are done,

make sure my roller coaster
is in tiptop shape.

[smashing glass]

[screaming]

[mewing]

Perfect.
It's all coming together!

When the assistant arrives,
he'll take one look at my lair

-and exclaim...
-You call this a lair?

How dare you? Listen,
you pompous little pipsqueak,

I'll crush you like a bug!

Not if you want your lair
in our magazine.

You can't do this to me!

Modern Lair brings
our readers a contemporary,

upbeat take on evil.

Your idea of evil is totally
retro, without the irony.

Your lasers are
a ridiculous shade of blue.

And please rotate
that Bunsen burner degrees

-before I get sick.
-Give me a chance!

-I'll spruce up the place.
-I'll give you a week.

I'm gonna need help

from someone with a real feel
for colour and shape.

Definitely gonna
have to outsource this one.

I know!

My seat cushions
with floral upholstery

that complements each guest's
colouring are ready.

The ice sculpture has melted
enough to hide the marks...

And I dug a trench
around the table

and filled it with broken glass.

I might have used rose petals,
but we'll go with it.

Sonic, how are you doing
on those fruit drinks?

[snoring]

Why am I not surprised?

Tails,
where's the soothing music?

Right here!
But I thought it would be better

if I gave it a little boost.

Knuckles,
are my grilled pheasants ready?

Not now, Amy, I'm busy.

[falsetto] Oh,
please don't cook me, Knuckles!

Today turned out a lot different
than I expected!

Sticks, sometimes I don't know
why I go out of my way

to make things nice
for these guys.

You deserve better.

I mean, this table! It should
be hanging in a museum!

[w*r cry]

Back, villain! Just give me
the signal, and I'll clam him!

Don't let the fact that
I constantly try to destroy you

lead you to believe
I'm here to destroy you.

I just want to hire Amy
to redo my lair.

[laughing]

Come on, Amy,
you're not buying this.

Is it so hard to believe
Eggman might respect my talents?

Well, yeah.
Wait, that came out wrong.

I accept.

-Don't go with Eggbreath.
-You can't trust him.

-He's evil.
-I can take care of myself.

Splendid! My lair awaits.

After you.

Don't look at me!

I didn't use her lovingly
prepared meal as a puppet!

So, where do you want to start?

You have total creative freedom.

Make this lair so fantastic

that they'll want to put it
on the cover!

And then I'll say "No"!
[evil laugh]

-Why?
-Sorry.

Old habits are hard to break.

Er, it's great, but...

I'm not sure about the colour.

It just doesn't say

"contemporary,
upbeat take on evil".

This colour is called "Contemporary,
Upbeat Take on Evil Blue".

Hmm. Too much plaid?

Maybe a little.

The rose petals
and laser light show

add a certain regal flair,
but do we really need... that?

I've never felt so free!

-[door bell]
-It's him!

Hello! What a surprise!

He hates it.

I knew those unicorns
were too much.

I can explain.
The one to blame...

-I love it.
-...is me.

Yes, I really outdid myself,
didn't I?

-What? It was my design!
-Under my supervision.

-And my execution!
-With my direction!

I just have one note.

A -hour workweek
for the cherubs?

[crash]

Danger up the entryway a little,

and, who knows,
you might make the cover.

I'll be back tomorrow
with the photographer.

Did you hear that? The cover!

Great.
Have fun "supervising" yourself.

I'm outta here.

Ah!

-Really?
-What did you expect?

I'm a supervillain!

Now, once you're finished
"dangering up" the entryway,

I want to put in
an evil screening room.

Cheer up.
At least I appreciate you,

unlike your so-called friends.

Burned food just doesn't
taste the same without Amy.

Knuckles,
you're eating a napkin.

Yeah. I knew that.

-Knuckles is right.
-What?

Not about the napkin-eating.
About Amy.

We need to make sure she's OK.

Yeees?

We came to get Amy.
Is she done yet?

Amy has decided to become
my full-time decorator.

She doesn't want anything to do
with her old friends.

Wow.
Never thought Amy'd abandon us.

I don't think she did. Come on.
Let's find a way into this lair.

[sniffs]
Eww, what is that smell?

It's us. We snuck in
through a sewer pipe.

I was wondering how long it
would take for you to miss me.

We may have a hard time
saying it, Amy, but...

-Well, you know.
-Yeah, I know.

There's no way we're going out
the way we came in.

Care to do the honours?

[slurps]

[bang]

Sorry about the door.
Oh, and I quit.

No one quits my employ
unless I dismantle them first!

It's true!

After you.

I... um... You're early!

Apparently.

You're fired.

Ride the roller coaster.
That always cheers me up.

Wait! Please! Forget the cover.

How about a smaller spread?
A couple of pages? A page?

A snapshot buried behind
some cleaning-product ads?

Would have been nice to see
my designs in a magazine.

Oh, well, maybe some day.

I can't guarantee you
a magazine spread,

but I do know a shack
you could redecorate.

Really? I've wanted
to fix that place up for years.

-Oh, Sonic, it will be amazing!
-Just a few things.

My coconut-husk collection
is off limits.

And no washing, painting,
plastering or cleaning.

But other than that,
you have total creative freedom.