01x36 - Beyond the Valley of Cubots

[bunniefuu]

Grr!

"Habeas Corpus."

"Due process."

Oops.

"Authorization to clean desk."

[clears throat] Ready for
the fishing trip, old bean?

No, no, no.
Too much approving to do.

The town bylaws
won't stamp themselves.

"Self-Stamping Prohibition Act."

See? If only there was
someone to cover for me.

I say, if only there was someone
to cover for me...

So we can get the story started!

This is an outrage, a travesty,
a plukey plok!

-"A plukey plok"?
-I made that last one up.

Rule of threes, Your Majesty.

Anyway, I'd like
this important law passed.

[clears throat] "Henceforth,
peanut butter and pickles

shall ne'er be packaged
in separate containers

as they inevitably
wind up in the same sandwich."

I can help you with this,

but in exchange,
I'll need something from you.

Are you prepared to do
your civic duty?

[chuckles] You said "civic."

Yes. Citizen Knuckles,
I need you to stamp these laws

with the mayoral seal
between now and, say, : ,

-when the fish stop biting.
-I'm in!

Who's in charge here?

I guess I am.

[sleepy sigh]

-[drilling]
-Huh? Argh!

Hey!

Hey!

What are you doing?

The mayor's office just approved
construction of a new mall.

See?

[incoherent imprecations]

Next! [stamping]

Next! [stamping]
Next! [stamping] Next!

With whom do I speak about

adding a new wing
to the library?

With meem! Approved!

By the way, I believe the proper
pronunciation is li-berry.

I'd like approval
for a parade through town

to celebrate my half birthday!

Half birthday approved.

I think this village
should have moving sidewalks.

I don't know.

Do you want to live in a world
without moving sidewalks?

Excellent argument. Approved!

[stamping continues]

Hey, Knucks. Uh, why are you
in the mayor's office

-stamping bills into law?
-I'm doing my civic duty.

-[chuckles]
-Oh, grow up, Sonic.

[giggles] "Civic."

-Who's in charge here?
-I am!

And I'm doing a good job, too.

See?

You approved building
a new mall... next to my burrow?

-On my land?
-Sticks, Sticks, Sticks.

I approve lots of things,
next to lots of burrows,

on lots of people's lands.

I can't keep track
of all of 'em!

Your recklessness
is destroying my home!

Sticks, don't worry. You know
someone on the inside now!

Just write up a proposition
and I'll ram it through.

Gah! Politics has corrupted you!
I'm bringing you down, Knuckles!

-You and your g*ons!
-Me? What did I do?

[incoherent imprecations]

The trash should've been picked up!
Where's that garbage man?

I want to take a few months off.

See the trash
in other countries,

maybe get some fancy
foreign coveralls.

What's the worst
that could happen?

See? No consequences!

I can't keep looking
at this stack of failed inventions.

It's bad enough
looking at you two!

Must every random observation
circle back to insult us?

It's not you.

I'm just frustrated
about the trash situation, you idiots!

Apology accepted.

That's it!
I'm going to City Hall!

You lug nuts wait here.

We need to stop Knuckles
and get government out of our lives!

What has government
ever done for us?

Maintain the fire department.
Can't say that's a bad idea.

-[murmurs of assent]
-Well, yeah, that's true.

-There's also the sewer system.
-[murmurs of assent]

Yeah, I definitely don't want
that responsibility.

And have you tried
those new moving sidewalks?

Pretty sweet!

You can make
all the good arguments you want,

but don't come cryin' to me

when Knuckles gets
his pudgy government fingers

all over your lives.

Next! Whatcha got?

Well, it's kind of a long list.

No time to read a list.
Approved! Next!

Hey, Knurples!
What's with the trash collection?

-You've...
-Sorry,

there's a lot of people waiting.
You'll have to take a number.

It's out of numbers.

You need to fill out
a complaint form.

-Can I get one?
-I'd love to help you.

-Take a number.
-Grr.

I have a request to shout
"Woo-hoo!" in a public place.

Approved!

Woo-hoo! That was
the high point of my life.

Move it, pal! I got permission
to build my house right here!

And I got permission
to build my tunnel right here!

Outta the way!

I got a permit to build
my lemonade factory here!

We better go sort this mess out.

I'd like to check this one out.

Impossible. Thanks to
the Organised Bookshelf Act

it's now illegal
to check out books.

Finally I have protection

from people who think
books are for reading

and not for sitting neatly
in a row on the shelf.

[groans]

[grunts]

My ice cream! Why?
Why did the village reverse its ban

on flammable frozen treats?

Ooh! It's not moving! I'm stuck!

Just walk! Use your legs!

My taxes paid
for moving sidewalks.

No way I'm using my legs!

[grunts]

[arguing]

That red imbecile has done
more damage to this village

in a few hours
than I've done in years

with my ingenious, worthwhile,
and well-ex*cuted plans!

Knubbles must be stopped!

Much as I hate to say it,
Eggman, we're with you!

Now we need a plan.

You gotta outlaw peanut butter
and pickle sandwiches!

If people realise they can get
cheap, barely edible food

outside of Meh Burger,
I'm out of a job!

Look at you.
You who were once so proud.

Go now and never return!

I see what's going on here.

You're in the pocket of
Big Peanut Butter and Pickles.

Ow! Is there any chance

you could stamp some sort
of universal healthcare law?

OK, Knuckles,
I order you to stand down.

Lower the stamp
and back away from the desk.

-No.
-Well, I'm out of ideas.

I'm not!

It's now illegal
to use your finger

to activate a w*apon.

Grr!

Ow!

Any chance I can get in
on that universal healthcare?

No boomerangs! No hammers!
No inventions! No spin att*cks!

No mayonnaise!

Knuckles,
you've gone mad with power!

Oh, really? Well, would someone
mad with power approve a law

giving himself ultimate
authority over everything?

That's the dictionary definition
of "mad with power!"

I wish I could corroborate that,

but it's illegal to check books
out of the liberry.

Huh?

Nice try, Knuckles, but I'm
afraid your stamp is out of ink.

[groans]

Nice work!
Now destroy the stamp!

-Eggman?
-I'm afraid there's been

a slight change of plans.

With this stamp,
I now rule the village!

First order of business?

Strip waste management
of all vacation time!

[evil laugh]

Au contraire, mi amigo.

Any change to waste management
requires form C- .

And where do I find that?

You'll have to take a number.

[grunts]

Find me that form!

[battle cry]

I believe I outlawed
those weapons.

Knuckles, you gotta
let us fight! Or else...

Eggman's trash will be collected
in a timely fashion?

Wait, why are we fighting this?

Because he picked my stamp up
off the ground

and seized absolute power!

[battle cry]

Grr! Huh?

Aha! Now to get some ink.

Where's my octopus bot?

Right here, boss!

[laughs]

Ah!

Look what you've done!

You've created more trash
that won't get hauled away.

Ah, it's always good to get away
for a few hours.

What the... ?

Sorry about the mess.

But you know how it is,
being mayor,

stamping everything
that comes across your desk,

regardless of its merits.

You have no idea how happy
we are to see you, sir.

Any chance
I can get my trash collected?

Take a number.

[sighs]