08x18 - Any Moment

[bunniefuu]

Previously on...

At Mike's funeral,
Susan and M.J. said good-bye.

Gaby gave her blessing.

You should quit your job.

If being a counselor
is gonna make you happy,

then that's what you should do.

Lynette spoke her mind
about Tom's girlfriend...

I actually don't think
it's gonna last that much longer.

And the police gathered more evidence.

Someone is accusing you
of k*lling Mr. Sanchez.

That's just silly.

I wanna make sure we get enough

to put this bitch away for good.

Renee Perry had waited
many months for a proposal,

and for many months,
she had been disappointed.

There had been cozy evening by the fire...

that didn't go the way she had hoped.

A romantic moment in Wisteria park...

that wasn't so romantic after all.

And a beautiful picnic by a lake...

that turned out to be

nothing more than a picnic.

So when disappointment struck again...

Renee decided to speak up.

Dessert?

That's the big finale to a -course meal?

Dessert?

Were you expecting, like, a cheese course?

No!

I was expecting a ring.

You have red roses, champagne.

You are sending me every
signal in the world

that I'm about to get a big proposal

and instead, I get a cookie.

Well, it's a chocolate souffle.

Whatever. I am not a young woman.

I don't know how many more
fake outs my heart can take.

Okay, fine. I-I was gonna propose tonight.

I just did such a horrible
job the first time,

I-I... I wanted this to be exceptional.

They call it "Popping the question,"

Can I at least, uh,
read you the speech that I wrote?

Oh, lord. Just give me the last paragraph.

Okay.

"For all these reasons and more,"

"it is with great honor,
that I ask you if you"...

Uh, we're ignoring that. Keep going.

"i-if you would consider making me"

"the happiest man in the"...

Go away!

It's the police.

We're looking for Mr. Ben Faulkner.

I'm Ben Faulkner. How can I help you?

You own the condominium project

under construction at Chapman woods?

I used to. Bank owns it now.

You mind coming down
to the station with us?

I want to ask you about
a body we found on the site.

Is... he under arrest?

No, ma'am. We just want to ask
you boyfriend a few questions.

Wait!

He's not my boyfriend. He's my fiance.

Yes, Renee Perry had waited
a long time for a proposal...

Okay. Now you can take him.

And she wasn't about to let
it slip through her fingers.

Bree Van de Kamp started every morning

by catching up on the latest news,

but sometimes the news came
from an unexpected source.

Hey, Bree. Look what happened to my hand.

Oh, my goodness!

Are you...

We're getting married.

Oh, how wonderful!

- Yeah, we're pretty happy.
- "Pretty happy"?

Oh, we're ecstatic. Knickers to the wind.

Over the moon.

Congratulations. When did this happen?

Last night. Oh, and get this...

In the middle of his big,
romantic proposal,

the cops come by to ask
about some dead body

they found at the construction site.

So tell me more.

Well, I definitely want a big wedding.
Bridesmaids, the works.

I was talking about the body.
What did the police say?

Uh, not much. You know, I told them

that I didn't know anything about it,
and they believed me.

Good.

Although I have to say,

I'm surprised you didn't tell me sooner.

- You know...
- Oh, we're sorry. Uh, it was late,

And I wanted to tell my sister first.

Again, talking about the body.

Why would we tell you that?

And why are we talking
about this and not me?

Quite right. I-I just would
hate to see this tragic news

interfere with your happy day.

And I don't think it will,

but I really don't think
you should worry about it.

Uh, the police don't seem like
they're gonna pose a problem.

That was judge Kemp.

He just signed off on that warrant.

For Bree Van de Kamp?

That was fast.

I might've called in some favors.

The sooner I can prove she's guilty,

the sooner I can watch her pay for it.

We got another one. Um, Mitzi Kinsky.

"Mike was a ray of sunshine on our street."

"He will be missed dearly."

Isn't that lovely?
Everybody's been so generous.

Yeah. Ten jars of homemade jam.

I don't know if she was being generous

or just cleaning out her basement.

Well, either way,
it's a gesture of love and support.

Makes me feel better.

There is my baby boy.

Morning, bub.

Eggs on a raft,

just the way you like 'em.

These smell gross.

Okay, um, not a problem.

Is there something else you'd like me to...

M.J.

It's okay, honey.

Um, what do you want?

Strawberry ice cream.

Uh, buddy, I don't think

that's the healthiest way
to start your day.

I don't care what you think.

Well...

Maybe just this once.

I'll get you a bowl.

Or, uh, no bowl is good.

I'm gonna eat this in front of the TV.

Can you bring me some sprinkles?

Of course, honey.

Uh, mom.

What? It's just ice cream, okay?

He lost his dad.

Okay.

Mom, where's my sprinkles?

Coming!

What's... going on here?

I thought I'd kick off
your big resignation day

with a power breakfast.

Plus the expiration on
this sausage was yesterday.

I gotta say,

now that the day is finally here,

I'm starting to get a little freaked out.

Don't you worry.

I've made a decision.

I'm getting a job.

What? You don't have to do that.

No, I want to. It's time I help out.

I owe it to you.

So I wrote up a resume,

I booked a meeting
at an employment agency,

and I even bought myself
a girlie briefcase.

But I thought we were just gonna cut back,

live a smaller life?

Yeah, I thought about that.

Then I decided I want
a slightly bigger life,

So I figure if I work,

the girls can stay in private school,
we can keep both cars,

and maybe even take

one of those ski trips
we talked about canceling.

Gaby, I love that you're trying to help,

but an entry-level salary is not
gonna cover the cost of skis,

let alone five nights at the Ritz.

Well, maybe not now,
but if I work my way up the ladder,

in a few years, I'll be
pulling in the big bucks,

just like you do.

Or did.

What kind of ladder are
we talking about here?

What is it that you're gonna do?

I don't know yet. That's where
the employment lady comes in.

She's gonna help me figure out

How to best utilize my "Skill set."

Yeah, I read that one
in your business magazines.

I'm proud of you stepping up like this.

I hope you find a job
that has health care,

'cause my benefits end today.

What?

No risky meat without benefits.

Yeah, Doug and I eloped,

so this time, I want an
over-the-top wedding...

horse-drawn carriages, fireworks,

poodles dyed purple.

Uh, is this weird,

me going on about how happy I am

while you're all sad and single?

Actually, I'm hoping
I won't be single for long.

I've decided to try to get Tom back.

So we're done talking about me?

Yeah. Kinda.

Great.

So what are you thinking?

I figure I'll just come clean,

tell him I screwed up,
and beg him to come back.

It's amazing you landed
a man in the first place.

Well, what do you think I should do?

Oh. Throw yourself at him.

Next time he stops by,
let a boob fall out of your blouse

or maybe bend over in
those tight-ass jeans.

That's not gonna work.

You're right. Sorry.

What do I know about getting a man?

Oh, wait.

A lot.

Come on. Help.

It's not gonna be easy splitting them up.

They just moved in together
and they seem so happy.

Of course they're happy.
They're in that honeymoon phase.

They're still taking trips,

laughing at each other's jokes,

pretending they're interested in museums.

We had a honeymoon phase, too.

Maybe I need to remind him of that.

Well, remind him naked.

The only tricky part is
gonna be getting him alone.

Jane watches him like a hawk,

a tall, bitchy hawk.

Well, whatever you do, do it soon.

I'm not gonna waste
a plus one at my wedding

unless I know it's serious.

Hey. Mom?

Andrew!

It's wonderful to see you. How are you?

I'm good. I'm good. I'm really good.

Really? Because your sister
told me you lost your job.

I've been so worried.

Didn't you get any of the messages I left?

I've just been really busy.
Uh, but everything's fine.

In fact, I met someone.

You did? That's wonderful.

I know how hard
your breakup from Alex was.

I'm so happy that you're moving on.

Yeah, well, you know,
it's only been a few months,

but, uh, it's pretty serious.

How serious?

Serious enough that
we were driving through town,

and I thought the two of you should meet.

He's here?

Uh, yeah, well, I...

I want you to keep an open mind.

Who's this?

This is Mary Beth,

my fiancee.

I'm so glad to finally meet you.

I've been telling this guy

I can't marry him until I meet his mom.

So you're really engaged

to... each other?

Uh, yeah.

Yeah, and remember,
you're happy I've moved on, right?

I just have so many questions.

I know what you must be thinking.
It's too soon.

No, that's not what I'm thinking.

Mom.

I'm sorry. It's just that
you're very different

than all of the other...
dates Andrew's brought home.

Well, you know, people change.

So how did you two meet anyway?

Oh, it's a real cute story.

I was at the community center

for my overeaters anonymous meeting,

but I went into
the A.A. meeting by mistake.

And by "Mistake,"

I mean I remembered how
drunks love their doughnuts.

So as I was reaching for
a buttermilk glazed,

there was Andrew.

You were in overeaters anonymous?

Yeah, I actually lost pounds

and then gained pounds
of grade "A" beefcake!

- Isn't she adorable?
- Uh-huh.

Andrew, would you help me in the kitchen?

I'd like to get some tea biscuits,

and they're on a very high shelf.

Ooh, tea biscuits.

calories.

Andrew, I do not understand.

What is going on here?

Look, I-I know it's not
who you were expecting,

but remember how you always said
that being gay was just a phase,

that I-I just needed
to meet the right girl?

Well, you were right.

Just be happy for me.

Come on. Back to bed.

M.J., it is : in the morning.

You should be in bed.

You can't tell me what to do.

What did you just say to me?

Hey. Turn that back on!

Mnh-mnh.

Guys?

What's going on in here?

I am trying to get M.J. back to bed.

I can't sleep.

Yeah, well, blowing up
aliens isn't gonna help.

Come on.

No, I wanna play my game.

Turn it back on now!

Shh. Shh. Don't get upset.

You can finish your game.

What?

Just for a little while,

then you have to go back to bed, okay?

Mom, can I talk to you for a second?

I think you're making a mistake.

It's not that big a deal.

Yes, it is.

Look, I know what
he's going through is awful,

but this isn't helping.

He's totally taking advantage of you.

He's not taking advantage.

He's traumatized,

and it's k*lling me to see
what he's going through,

so if I can give him a little joy

by letting him play video games,

that's what I'm gonna do.

So I'm looking to make
in the -figure range,

plus benefits, of course.

And I have two young girls,
so flexible hours would be good.

And we always take this big vacation,

so I'll need two weeks off. Maybe three.

You know what? Just give me all of august.

So what do you got for me?

A reality check.

Excuse me?

Mrs. Solis, you're gonna have
to adjust your expectations.

Up?

No. Have you not been
reading the newspapers?

The job market right now is brutal.

I have people with PhDs
that I can't find jobs for,

and frankly, your job
experience is very limited.

Modeling, modeling, modeling.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Print,

runway,

boat show.

Who's the job expert here?

Plus, there's a -year gap here.

Yeah, to be a doting wife
and a loving mother of two.

You have experience with children.

I have a job at a day care center.

And deal with other people's kids?

I don't even like my own.

Look, you didn't go to college,

you didn't even graduate high school,

and your only references are

photographers and aging rock stars.

In today's market,
you're basically unemployable.

And you actually get paid for this?

So now what am I supposed to do?

Well, you could start planning
that august vacation.

Gabrielle Solis was depressed,

and when she was depressed,

nothing lifted her spirits
like a good workout...

of her credit card.

May I help you?

Yeah, uh, I just wanna get that
little red scarf I saw in the window.

Then I'll be on my way.

All right.

Although that...

black sheath dress would
go perfect with it.

Mm.

Look at those over-the-knee boots!

Okay. Who am I kidding?

Get me a double cappuccino
and a muscular stock boy.

Mama needs a new pair of everything.

I said taupe. This is clearly beige.

We don't have it in taupe.

Second floor, third mannequin
from the left. Look alive.

I'll try these in plum,

these in leopard,

these... oh, forget it.

No lady wants to see
anything under inches.

You go with you. You go with you.

You go away.

No one's been able to
make that romper work.

Should we help her?

Stay back. She knows what she's doing.

Navy blazer, silver hoop earrings,
platform wedge.

And a red patent leather clutch.

Genius! Genius.

Everything looks and smells so amazing,
Mrs. Van de Kamp.

Do you mind if I take a picture?

Of the food?

That way I eat just a little bit now,

and then later, when I'm hungry,

I can look at the picture
and get full on the memory.

Don't you just wanna eat her up?

Not before I take a picture of her.

You know, Mary Beth,

I just realized I don't
know a thing about you.

What do you do?

Well, actually, nothing.

My parents have been pretty generous.

Oh, really? What, uh,
sort of work are they in?

None of your business, mom.

No, no. It's okay.

They invented Mary Beth's frozen custard.

Mary Beth? You're that Mary Beth?

Recognize me? The kid on the carton?

It's in every supermarket in the country.

It must be a multibillion dollar...

Oh.

Would you help me in the kitchen, Andrew?

Now.

Andrew, I knew you were
having financial troubles,

but I never thought you'd stoop to this.

- What?
- She's an heiress.

You're obviously marrying her
for her money.

I'm marrying her because
I'm crazy about her.

We love the same movies.
She makes me laugh.

She gets me. She's really an amazing girl.

I think I found your good side!

Smile, gnocchi.

She's disturbed.

Okay. All right. She's a little eccentric,

but you know what? I love her.

Andrew Van de Kamp,
you love italian shoes.

You love mid-century modern furniture.

And according to
your internet history, you love...

army doctors giving elaborate
physicals to young recruits.

But you do not love girls.

Why can't you accept that I've changed?

Because h*m* is not a choice.

You were born this way.

I'm the one who told you that.

And it took me a long time,

but I was finally able to
wrap my head around it.

Honey, you're here, you're q*eer,
and I'm used to it.

You know what, mom?
I'm not here anymore, all right?

Mary Beth, let's go.

Hey.

How was your dad's?

Fine.

Aw!

She was in a bit of a mood,

but I still love you unconditionally.

Let me guess... did it have something to do

with a certain Taylor Swift
concert this Thursday night?

I'm just saying,

all my friends' moms are taking them.

And all your friends' moms are
gonna be deaf for two weeks,

like I was the last time
I went to a concert.

I'm not doing it.

It's not fair.

I am gonna go give Paige a bath.

Thank you for bringing her home.

I'm gonna go grab your suitcase.

Mom! Please!

It'd make you the bestest
mom in the whole wide world!

Nope. The matter is closed.

This sucks.

Hey.

You know who else likes Taylor Swift?

Me.

I mean, if your parents are okay
with it, I'll take you.

Oh, my god!

Oh!

You're the best! I'll check
with my mom and call you?

Can't wait.

Okay!

So?

Totally worked.

You'll have dad all to yourself
Thursday night.

You are the bestest girl
in the whole wide world.

Gaby!

Hi, babe.

What is that?

This?

It's a boot.

I bought a boot.

You bought... one boot?

Yep. 'Cause I'm frugal.

One day I'll buy the other one.

That's all you bought?

Because I got a call from the bank.

Seems somebody was going crazy
with your credit card.

Huh. Maybe it was stolen.

Yeah.

By a size with
incredibly expensive taste.

What is this shopping bag
doing under the bed?

I bought a gift for a woman

whose husband is in Iraq,
fighting for our freedom.

Gaby! You're taking it all back.

I can't.

Not if I've worn it.

Can't take it back.
Can't take it back now.

See? It's all...

Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop!

Our lives have changed.
We can't afford this anymore.

Not unless you got some big
job you haven't told me about.

What's wrong?

I met with that job lady.

But she basically said
I'm not qualified to do anything.

I didn't finish school.
I've never had a real job.

The only thing I've ever gotten
paid for is being pretty.

I just feel like my life

has been one bad decision after another.

Uh... what about the girls?

What about marrying me?

That's the part that hurts the most.

You guys are the only good thing
I've ever done,

and I feel like I'm letting you down.

Gaby...

you are smart.

You'll figure something out,

something great.

But in the meantime,

all these clothes

have to go back.

I know.

Could you just give us a moment alone?

Hello?

Yes, this is his mother.

He did what?

He threw a stapler at you?

Yes, right at my head.

Are you sure it wasn't an accident?

He couldn't have been aiming at your head.

What he said was...

and I wrote this down
because I wanted to be exact...

"Leave me alone,"

"or I'm going to throw
this stapler at your head."

I-I'm so sorry.

You do know that M.J.
just lost his father, right?

I do. My heart goes out to both of you.

But there is no place for
v*olence in my classroom,

no matter what
the circumstances are at home.

"Circumstances"?

Um...

I mean, it's not like
he just lost his favorite toy

or a pet turtle.

He... lost his dad.

Yes, but if M.J. had thrown
that stapler a little harder,

my grandkids might have lost
their grandmother.

Well, I'm sure that he is sorry.

He isn't. In fact, he said... and I quote...

"Bull's-eye."

I'm considering having him
removed from my class.

Okay. Uh...

What M.J. did was wrong,

but... I'm finding it hard to believe

that a person that spends
so much time with children

could be so oblivious to a child's pain.

I have other children
I need to protect.

And M.J. is a very angry little boy.

Well, of course he's angry.

He's ,

and one of the most important
and loving people

in his life has just been
ripped away from him,

and now he has to live with the fact

that his father is never coming back.

Inside voices, please.

Oh, to hell with your "Inside voices."

His father is dead.

My husband is dead!

Oh! My foot.

It's her.

Why is everyone looking at me?
Did I do something wrong?

No. No, in fact, we have done nothing

but talk about your shopping skills
for the last hours.

Really?

Yes. We even went back

and watched the security tape
to see it again.

Well, keep the tape. It was my last show.

- What?
- Uh, circumstances have changed.

My shopping days are over.
So just do me a favor.

Wait till I'm gone to restock the boots.

I can't cry again today.

Uh, wait. Wait.

Take care of these for Mrs. Solis

and bring her a glass of champagne.

- Champagne?
- Mm-hmm.

Did you not hear me? I'm broke.

You have no reason to
suck up to me anymore.

Well, I do if I want you to work here.

Huh?

You see, you're like a...
a shopping savant,

and every day, women come in here
with all the money in the world

and no clue what to spend it on.

You could help them.

You mean like a personal shopper job?

No, do not think of it as a job.

For you, my dear, it is a calling.

I don't know.

Employees get a % discount.

Hi. Welcome to Cumberly's.

My name's Gabrielle. Can I help you?

I want to thank you
for accepting my apology

and coming over before you left town.

I feel like I haven't had
the appropriate reaction

to this wedding.

No. No, no, you've been wonderful.

Well,

to show you how excited I am that
my little boy is getting married,

I've thrown you
a surprise engagement party.

Mom, what the hell is this?

Oh, I just invited some
of your old friends over

to congratulate you.

Hey, girl. I haven't seen you in ages.

Those shoes are ferosh.

Who's this hag?

This is Andrew's fiancee Mary Beth.

Hi, Mary Beth. I'm Brian with an "I."

This is Bryan with a "Y."

What is this about you getting
married? We need to dish.

Um, uh, sweetie, why don't...

why don't you go in
the kitchen and grab a drink?

I just love those boys.

They used to be here all the time.

So what did you think of Andrew's friends?

They seem sweet and very well-groomed.

Well, yeah, but don't they seem,

I don't know, a little... disco-y?

Mrs. Van de Kamp, I know Andrew's gay.

You do?

We've never actually made love,

and he has a picture of
Michael Phelps next to his bed.

Says it's patriotic, but...

I don't understand.
If you know about him...

You have to understand,

I grew up fat and lonely.

When I lost all the weight,

I thought men would look at me
differently, but they didn't.

I just kind of gave up.

Oh, Mary Beth.

But then I met Andrew. He's sweet, fun,

and I just thought...

I could do a lot worse.

No. No. No. Now you listen to me.

You deserve real romance
and passion in your life.

I know all about this.

I have been with plenty
of men for companionship

when it should've been for love.

The right man for you
is out there somewhere.

You just can't settle.

It's not fair to you or to Andrew.

I think we need to talk.

All right.

Coming! Coming! Coming!

Okay.

Oh, no.

Hey.

Hey. I-I came as soon
as I got your message.

So power's out, huh?

I know. This is so embarrassing.

I just got off the phone
with the electric company,

and it turns out it's a faulty line,

so they're gonna fix it first
thing tomorrow morning.

So you don't need me to
look at anything or...

I'm sorry. I feel terrible dragging you

all the way over here,

so you want something for
your trouble? A drink or...

Nah. No. No. I don't...
I don't want to be in your hair.

No, no. You're not.

Honestly, it's a little scary

being all alone in a dark house.

Hence the hundreds of candles.

Yeah, I did go a little overboard, huh?

What are you cooking?

It smells amazing in here.

Yeah? I'm trying out
a new recipe for the kids.

Beef bourguignon.

But Penny's with Jane

and Parker's having pizza
with the Martindales.

I love beef bourguignon.

Oh, that's right. I totally forgot.

Y-you remember the first time we tried it?

New York. Our second anniversary.

Oh, that must be where I got the idea.

I was just looking at
pictures from that trip.

Oh, yeah? You-you got
out the old photo album?

Yeah.

Oh, ho ho. Man!

Look at us.

Hey.

Why don't you stay for dinner?
I'll make you a plate.

Yeah, I don't know.

Come on. Jane's at the concert.

What would you rather do...

eat a microwave dinner all
alone in your apartment or...

beef bourguignon?

Well...

I hate for it to go to waste.

Well, I hope you're happy.

Mary Beth is on her way back to Wisconsin.

I'm sorry.

Why are you so concerned about her life?

What about me?! I'm your son.

I did this for you.
Can you look me in the eye

and tell me you would've been happy

spending the rest of
your life with that woman?

That marriage really
could have helped me out,

and you have no idea how much help I need.

Why? What is going on?

Where do I start? Um...

Well, I took a loss on
the house that you got me,

I, uh, I lost my job,

can't find a new one.

I have a ton of credit card debt,

and Mary Beth was willing to
help me out with all of that.

Well, so would I. Why didn't
you come to me for help?

Do you know what it feels like
to have to keep running back

to your mother to fix your problems?

My whole life,
you've been propping me up...

when I needed a job, when I was dumped,
when I was drinking.

I'm just... I'm so tired

of you seeing me as a failure.

Andrew, if you would
go through all of this

rather than come to me for help,

then I am the one who's failed.

How about we just agree
that we both failed?

So what are you gonna do now?

I don't know. I had a
pretty good setup there...

a place to live, somebody who needed me,

all the frozen custard I could eat.

Well, I don't have any custard,

but I can offer you a place to stay,

and... someone else who needs you.

All right.

But just until I get
back on my feet again.

Now let's talk about that party.

I could swear I saw Bryan with
a "Y" checking you out.

Ah, well, actually,

I am more into Geoffrey with a "G."

Now that's my gay son.

God, look at all the stuff we're doing.

We used to be interesting.

I know. We-we hiked.
We went to the theater.

We-we took salsa lessons.

And then came the kids.

Ah, fun K*llers. Huh.

Mmm. This is amazing.

It's even better than that
restaurant in New York.

I don't know. That place was pretty good.

How did we even find it?

- You don't remember?
- Mnh-mnh.

We got caught in that torrential downpour.

We ducked in there to dry off.

Right. And then the owner insisted
on making us a special meal

because we had that newlywed look.

A lot of water under that bridge, huh?

Yeah, but it was a pretty strong bridge.

Look how young we were.

Yeah.

Back then I could actually see
without my reading glasses.

Here you go. Best I can do for light.

Thank you.

Ha ha ha.

I'm glad you kept these.

Good memories, huh?

Yeah.

You know, sometimes you just get...

overwhelmed by work and...

kids and life, and it's just...

so easy to...

forget.

Yeah.

Yeah, it is.

I'm on fire.

Oh, my god. Oh, my god! I'on fire!

Oh! Oh, my god! Oh!

Are you okay?

I think I burnt the skin.

Oh, jeez. Let me see.

Oh, it doesn't look so bad.

I thought the power was out.

They must have... fixed it.

You set this up.

You know, in-in my defense, I...

What the hell is going on?

I just wanted to see where we stood,

if there was still anything between us,

if we could find our way back
to those people in the pictures.

By tricking me?

I'm-I'm sorry about how I did it,

but you can't deny what just happened.

You still feel something.

Jane just moved in with me,

and you do this now?

Hey mom.

Hey. How was the concert?

Awesome.

How'd it go with dad?

Not so awesome.

Yeah, I kinda got that
from the sweatpants.

Mm. Come here, you.

- Hi.
- Mm. Hi.

So now what?

I... don't know.

Well, I'll tell you what you can't do.

Give up.

Taylor Swift has this song...

"You belong with me." It's...

about how she won't stop loving this guy

even though he's with the wrong girl.

And when she sang it tonight,

all I could think about was you and dad.

And this guy she loves...

does he eventually come to his senses?

It wouldn't be a very
good video if he didn't.

And don't worry.

Dad will, too.

You think?

Mom, you're fighting for him.

What guy doesn't like that?

You know...

when you say something
really smart like that,

it makes me think I did a really good job.

You think it's gonna blister?

It's a first-degree burn.

Tom, you'll be fine.

But as your physician,

let me recommend...
no more candlelit baths alone.

Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking.

Well, the good news is I can
declare you healthy enough

for any and all sexual activity.

Actually...

I need to get some work done.

Okay.

Well, the nice thing about
us living together...

if you change your mind,
you know where to find me.

Okay.

That's the last of them.

Okay.

Actually, we're not done here.

I want to talk to you.

Is this about what happened at school?

Yes.

You need to know that it is never okay

to throw a stapler at someone.

I know.

It's also never okay

to sweep a bunch of
stuff off someone's desk

because you don't like what
they're saying about your son.

Particularly if they've
just had bunion surgery.

You did that to Mrs. Butters?

I'm not proud of it, but yeah.

I was really mad.

Just like you.

M.J., something horrible happened to you,

and every time you started
to get angry about it,

I wanted to cover it up with
ice cream or video games,

but the truth is,
we shouldn't cover it up.

We should let it out.

Now we can't hurt people...

but we can...

hurt jam.

Mom!

People sent us this to
help us feel better,

and it's going to,

just not in the way they thought.

Come on, buddy.

You got a lot to be angry about.

What happened... sucks.

Oh, sweetie.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you so much.

That's a cake I made for a
wedding a few years ago.

I know what you're gonna say.

- It's too extravagant.
- It's not big enough.

Oh. Well, I suppose
we could add another tier.

Make it two.

I really appreciate this, Bree.

Ben is such a guy.

He's not gonna be any help
planning this wedding.

Yes, especially since he's dealing

with the nasty business of the body.

Oh, that? No, Ben's in the clear.

Really?

Yeah, the cops called this morning.

Uh, they figured out the guy they found

d*ed eight months ago.

That was way before Ben
started construction.

Yeah, the cops think the guy
was just some poor drifter.

Anyway, it's over.

Oh, good.

Well, now we can focus all our energy

on giving you the best
wedding in the world.

Tomorrow we'll start our planning.

Yes, in life,

when we see an opportunity,
we have to take it,

whether it's the hope

of winning back the love of our life...

a sh*t at proving our worth...

or the chance to show a
child the right path.

But sometimes when we answer the call...

Hello?

Hi. It's Bree.

We have no idea what
opportunity awaits us.

Renee just told me the good news,

and I wanted to thank you
for keeping my secret.

Ah, no worries. I told you I would.

I know but even when suspicion
moved on to you,

you still protected me,
and that's very honorable.

Really, it was no big deal.

Maybe not to you.

You're not the one who
put a body in the ground.

You have to understand,
a day doesn't go by

when that does not weigh
heavily on my conscience.

Gotcha.