PART SEVEN (MINDWARP)
Written by Philip Martin
Original air date: 18th October, 1986
Run time: 24:33
Tunnel
Dorf: The Doctor. Do we att*ck?
Yrcanos: Of course. That dreg helping the Mentor's warriors is my enemy.
Corridor
Peri: What's happened to you, Doctor? Why do you hate me so?
The Doctor: I must do what I think is best.
Peri: I used to think that you were different, that you cared for justice and truth and good. I can't bear to look at what you are now.
Yrcanos: Now, Doctor, it is your turn to die.
Peri: No!
Yrcanos: My lady, what have you done? Because of you that vermin still lives.
Peri: I couldn't help it. The Doctor, he wasn't always like that.
Valeyard (O.C.): I suggest you always were...
Trial room
Valeyard: Just like that, my dear Doctor. A toady, a coward, a turncoat. You were afraid that Crozier wanted to transplant the brain of the alien Kiv into your head. You said as much yourself. The thought of that made you panic.
The Doctor: I've told you, it was a ploy. I would never want to harm Peri.
Valeyard: But you've also admitted that you have no clear memory of the event.
The Doctor: Well, I can recall some of it. Bits of it are beginning to bob back into my mind.
Valeyard: Oh, really? And does any of your sudden and convenient recall agree with anything that the court has already seen?
The Doctor: No! I mean yes, but, but the emphasis is all wrong.
Valeyard: And what does that mean?
The Doctor: The events took place but not quite as we've seen them.
Inquisitor: It occurs to me, Doctor, that your current mental condition makes it very difficult for you to defend yourself. I would therefore suggest that this court be adjourned.
The Doctor: No. And I refute any implication that I'm barmy.
Inquisitor: Barmy?
Valeyard: A rather imprecise Earth slang word, Sagacity, implying psychiatric instability.
Inquisitor: Thank you, Valeyard. No one is impugning your sanity, Doctor, merely suggesting your memory is a little faulty.
The Doctor: Nevertheless, I would like this trial to continue.
Inquisitor: I was also about to suggest that you might change your mind and consider availing yourself of a court defender. A trained legal mind would offer a more constructive and certainly less emotional presentation of your case.
The Doctor: If the Time Lords of Gallifrey want my life, you don't think I'd entrust my defence to one of their august number, do you?
Inquisitor: Very well. Let us continue.
Corridor
The Doctor: Ah, I appear to have lost my way. I was looking for Crozier's operating room.
The Doctor: Thank you. Most kind.
Operating room
Kiv: That is to become my new body?
Crozier: The coastguards found him adrift off the Islets of Brak. He is of the same branch of mutation and almost certainly from your home mire, my lord.
Kiv: He looks like a younger me.
Sil: Not quite so handsome, Magnificence.
Kiv: Be quiet, Sil.
Crozier: The features are similar. There is, however, one small addition. He has retained his primeval sting. His tail contains venom enough to k*ll.
Kiv: Fascinating. I could perhaps sting all my assistants to death.
Sil: More importantly, are you sure the new skull will be big enough?
Crozier: The capacity is only a little larger in volume than that of Lord Kiv. The operation will give us a little time to seek a more permanent host.
Sil: We must make every effort to find the right head on the correct body.
Crozier: I have someone in mind. Ah, Doctor. You've come to lend a hand.
The Doctor: Yes, thought I'd strop the odd scalpel, mop a brow or two.
Crozier: That won't be necessary, but you can monitor the BTU.
The Doctor: The BTU? Oh, bliss. Thank you.
Kiv: Then let us begin. Should the transfer not work, and brain death occur, my bearers have orders to liquefy all who fail to save my life.
Crozier: Check lymphocyte serum drip.
Matrona: Active.
Crozier: Laser scalpel.
Tunnel
Peri: These tunnels look the same to me. Where precisely are we going?
Yrcanos: As with all corrupt dictatorships, there are pockets of resistance planning and working to overthrow the evil of Kiv and the other Mentors.
Peri: Great, but how does that help us?
Yrcanos: My belief is that they await a great leader. I am he.
Peri: Do these resistance fighters know that?
Yrcanos: They will soon learn.
Dorf: My great king is right.
Peri: But how will we find these people?
Yrcanos: They will find us. Yes. Yes.
Yrcanos: Ssssss. Crombrom savalula. (whistles) Yes. Yes. Their footsteps are guided towards me. That is their destiny and mine.
Peri: Destiny. Isn't that just a fancy name for blind chance?
Yrcanos: Blind chance? Destiny? If that were true, our lives, my majesty, would be meaningless.
Peri: It's merely a point of view.
Yrcanos: A pompous and empty one, my lady. We all live for a purpose, and for me, that is to die a hero.
Peri: I do wish you wouldn't keep going on like that. I'm starting to believe you mean it.
Yrcanos: I do!
Peri: All right, all right. Let's rest first and then march. There's a good w*rlord, huh?
Yrcanos: Agreed. But only for a moment.
Peri: He sounds hungry. Don't blame him. So am I. I'm famished.
Yrcanos: Here. Here.
Peri: What is it?
Yrcanos: It's flayfish. Sustains the body, fuels the fighting spirit.
Peri: It doesn't do much for your taste buds, huh?
Peri: That's all right. Don't cry.
Yrcanos: No, stop that. Dorf is, or was, a great warrior.
Dorf: Jealous. He jealous.
Yrcanos: Jealous? I'm jealous? Me, a king? Jealous, you say I'm jealous?
Peri: The pair of you, just stop it!
Yrcanos: I'll tear your head off! You're nothing but a mongrel! He's a dog. He's a dog!
Peri: Stop it! Look, it's bad enough we've got this whole planet against us without you two trying to bite lumps out of each other.
Yrcanos: You're right. It's the flayfish. My fault. I should have saved it for our next battle. We must go, locate our allies, and then prepare to battle unto death.
Peri: Look, one thing at a time, huh? Let's find this Alphan resistance and convince them we're on their side. And then, on to our destiny, huh?
Yrcanos: You're right.
Operating room
Crozier: Donor brain in position.
The Doctor: EEG reading in recipient now level.
Crozier: Thank you, Doctor.
Sil: Why is this taking so long?
The Doctor: Why don't you go for a walk or something, Sil? You're like an anxious parent.
Sil: The wealth of the whole planet depends on that lump of mud-coloured tissue there. I haven't learnt all his secrets yet.
Crozier: Sil, stop gyrating your throat. I'm ready to attempt transference of brain tissue.
Sil: Please, Morgo, let them succeed.
Crozier: Prepare for independent support mode. The reading should reach twenty one point five six.
The Doctor: Twenty one point five six, uh huh.
Matrona: Approaching twenty dead.
The Doctor: Dead? Don't say that.
Matrona: Twenty fifty. Twenty seventy five.
The Doctor: Twenty one twenty, forty. Twenty one fifty six now!
Crozier: There's nothing. No heart, no brain readings, nothing. We've failed.
Sil: No, this is a joke! Admittedly in bad taste, but it is a profitless, humourless quip. Tell them! Half my fortune if you give me a five minute start. All right, you profitless knaves, all my money.
The Doctor: I think his chest gills moved. Did the lexifier unit register its input? The link was difficult to test.
Matrona: Nothing.
The Doctor: Reserve, quickly. Try the endrodiotone now.
Crozier: One last chance.
The Doctor: He's breathing.
Sil: You see? As I said, strange, witless humour.
Crozier: Thanks for the moral support, Sil.
The Doctor: Yes, nice to know that you can be relied upon to be your usual treacherous self.
Sil: I endeavour to maintain a certain continuity.
Tunnel
Peri: Hi.
Yrcanos: I told you they would find us. I have come to lead you to freedom.
Tuza: Hold your tongue. This way, unless you wish to die here.
Operating room
Crozier: Success, Doctor. After a decade of hard work, I can transform the evolutionary process and conquer death. The possibilities are endless.
The Doctor: You sure? Aren't you worried about tissue rejection?
Crozier: Ah, I've perfected a serum for just that. As from today, Doctor, I can put any brain in any body anywhere.
Sil: Now that you've assisted in a miracle of science, Doctor, perhaps you would like to witness a similar feat of commerce?
The Doctor: From you, Sil, why not? I could do with a laugh.
Rebel cave
Peri: So much for your foresight, huh? Tell them again we're on the same side, Yrcanos, please.
Yrcanos: Me, a king, beg to that rabble?
Tuza: You must understand we can't allow your bodies and skulls to be retrieved undamaged, otherwise the Mentors will use brain surgery to create creatures like this.
Peri: No, wait! Look, look, we're on the same side. Nobody likes brain alteration. Do you think Dorf wants to be the way he is? He was used by the Mentors. King Yrcanos was held hostage so they could exploit him as well as his people. And even I was held c*ptive. You k*ll us and you do nothing but please the Mentors.
Tuza: The Mentors?
Yrcanos: She speaks truth. I do not beg. Pulverise my skull and you slay an ally, but supply me with weapons and a good band of fighting men and I'll bring triumph against our enemies.
Tuza: I have heard of Yrcanos, King of the Krontep. If you are he, then you will have a plan.
Yrcanos: Untie us and you will hear.
Operating room
Matrona: Crozier, something's wrong.
Crozier: What? He was fine a moment ago. Cardiac arrest. His body's reacting to the dr*gs.
Crozier: You'll not die on me, you fish-faced monster.
Rebel cave
Tuza: Your plan is a sound one, but our men are untrained.
Yrcanos: Ha. Under my leadership, oh ho, they will fight like demons.
Peri: Come on now, boys. Let's not get carried away.
Dorf: I have seen him inspire disheartened rabble into acts of heroism.
Peri: But how many of them survived, huh?
Yrcanos: Bah, that's a minor consideration when there is glory to be had.
Tuza: In his way he's right. We have nothing to lose. At the moment, all we do is hide like vermin. All right, King Yrcanos of the Krontep, we'll fight.
Yrcanos: My hand hasn't touched honourable steel for what seems like an eternity.
Tuza: Find Verne and his men. He'll know where to meet us. Tell him the day of reckoning has come. Now hurry!
Commerce room
Sil: Interested, Doctor? Money, money, money, money, money, money, money. All the stock and commodity markets of the universe are available to us via the warpfold relay. See there? An application for credit.
The Doctor: Search Conv Corp. Who are they?
Sil: Nothing much. Just a bunch of burnt out space rangers who search for wrecked spaceships. They request funding to purchase another retrieval craft, which we will deny.
The Doctor: Wait. Planet of Tolk, twenty fourth century. I seem to recall there were a great many wars around the rim worlds at that time. There should be a large amount of battle cruiser debris floating round there soon.
Sil: For this company to retrieve?
The Doctor: If they have the equipment.
Sil: How useful to have a Time Lord in one's employ. Yes, I will allow their application for credit. Marsh minnow, Doctor?
Sil: The Lord Kiv will be most pleased with me for my great foresight. I must be sure that I am the first familiar face he sees with his new eyes.
The Doctor: That should be comforting for him. I, I think I'd better see how the patient's getting on.
Trial room
Valeyard: Sagacity, I wish to ask the accused why a Time Lord with all his privileges should meddle in a swamp world like Thoros Beta.
The Doctor: My actions can't be what they seem. There is an explanation. There must be. I can't recall it.
Inquisitor: Are you unwell, Doctor? Perhaps you'd like me to call for a recess?
Valeyard: Or perhaps a glass of water?
The Doctor: No. What? Now, let's get on. I've had enough of wondering why I acted as I did on Thoros Beta. Let's get to it. Let's find out! Play the Matrix, and play it loud and clear.
Tunnel
Yrcanos: Down.
Peri: What's happened?
Yrcanos: Old age.
Tuza: Linna?
Linna: Help me.
Tuza: It can't be. Linna? What is it?
Yrcanos: You knew him?
Tuza: He was a spice trader back home on Thoros Alpha. I can't believe what I see.
Yrcanos: Death comes to us all. He has lived a long life.
Tuza: Linna was no older than I am! He was twenty years old, not a hundred as he looks now. How has he been turned into an old man?
Peri: Look. No, don't touch it. It might be responsible for his premature aging.
Tuza: This is the work of the Mentors.
Yrcanos: What was this man's function?
Tuza: He was one of the guards at our weapons dump.
Peri: Oh, no.
Yrcanos: I smell treason, treachery, betrayal.
Tuza: I'll scout ahead.
Yrcanos: We'll all scout ahead.
Tuza: No, there could be danger.
Peri: No, let Tuza find out what's going on first, huh?
Yrcanos: Spying is not the way of the warrior. If one goes, we all go. Come.
Operating room
The Doctor: See what happens when I leave the room?
Sil: He must live!
Crozier: Increase the sevrin drip.
Crozier: Enough.
Sil: Not a flicker. Why has the Lord Kiv not yet returned to life?
The Doctor: It takes time. They're trying their best.
Matrona: No response. Brain pulse still dormant.
Sil: You are conspiring against my wealth. You are allowing the Lord Kiv to die.
Crozier: Wait.
The Doctor: A movement!
Matrona: A reaction here.
Crozier: To what degree?
Matrona: Almost a complete wave.
Crozier: It's going to work.
Sil: Lift me. Take me nearer. My face has got to be the first civilised thing he sees.
Sil: My lord.
Kiv: Have I d*ed and gone to the great Plague Halls of Mogdana?
Sil: Magnificence, it's me, Sil.
Tunnel
Peri: How much further?
Tuza: I only hope we're not too late.
Yrcanos: Hey, keep together. This is a great day for battle. A great day to die!
Tuza: Does he always go on like that?
Peri: Afraid so.
Operating room
Crozier: He's totally stable.
Sil: You said that last time.
The Doctor: Well, as long as you stay away from him, he should be all right.
Sil: The Great Morgo be praised. You have been restored to us, O great Kiv, safe and well.
Kiv: I dreamed I was lost in the Sea of Despair and Longing.
Crozier: Dreams were to be expected side-effects of sedation. Nothing to worry about.
Kiv: I feel hardly different. An ache in my, I suppose I can say my skull?
Crozier: Yes, that will be your skull until we can find one more suitable.
Kiv: I must to work. There is a futures commodity deadline for the Sondlex crop on Wilson One.
Sil: It will be attended to. The Doctor and I have struck up a profitable partnership.
Kiv: Oh? Not speculation, I trust?
The Doctor: Merely conserving resources, O ineffable one, until you return to your rightful place as master of us all.
Outside the weapons dump
Tuza: Verne and the others haven't arrived yet.
Yrcanos: No matter. Where are the weapons?
Tuza: No!
Peri: What's the matter?
Tuza: The rockfall, it's new.
Peri: Seismic activity?
Tuza: Well, if so, it's a very convenient one. It's covered up the entrance to our weapons dump.
Yrcanos: Ambush. A woman's way for fighting.
Peri: Thanks a lot.
Yrcanos: If these guards of the Mentors were real men, they would show their banners and fight in the open!
Peri: Let's get away from here and find the others, huh?
Tuza: She has a point.
Yrcanos: Retreat? I am King Yrcanos!
Peri: Yes, I know. Whereas it terrifies me, I'm just not so sure it's going to have the same effect on whoever caused that rockfall.
Dorf: If there is victory to be had, great king, it would be imprudent to say.
Yrcanos: You are a great dog of w*r. I mean, a great warrior, whose advice I trust and value. Oh, very well. Today prudence shall be our watchword. Tomorrow I shall soak the land in blood. Come with me!
Peri: What's happening?
Dorf: Wait, there could be danger.
Tuza: It's Verne!
Tuza: No!
Frax: Give up, and you live. Resist, and you die where you stand.
Trial room
The Doctor: That isn't my fault. You can't blame me for that. I wasn't even there.
Valeyard: All that has taken place, you are indirectly responsible for.
The Doctor: Please, madam. The death of Verne and the other resistance fighters was not my fault.
Inquisitor: Your presence did influence events. There's no way that can be denied.
Valeyard: Watch, Doctor. See your folly.
Outside the weapons dump
Yrcanos: Are we to die withered and aged, or like true soldiers?
Frax: You're obsessed with dying, Yrcanos. I don't know what's the matter with you.
Peri: And you rather we beg to live?
Frax: To be honest, I'd prefer it if you all kept quiet.
Yrcanos: You are nothing more than trash from the sewers of Skulnesh.
Frax: Shut up.
Yrcanos: You've been to the field of battle, that which robs great warriors of their youth and virility, and that is a crime against honour.
Frax: It was an experiment for Crozier and the Mentors.
Yrcanos: It was an experiment conceived in the Plague Halls of Mogdana, you scum!
Trial room
The Doctor: No! No, no, no, I won't believe it.
Valeyard: You still continue to ignore the truth.
The Doctor: I am not responsible for that.
Valeyard: In your mind, perhaps not. But in reality it is somewhat different, Doctor.
`
The Doctor
COLIN BAKER
Peri
NICOLA BRYANT
The Valeyard
MICHAEL JAYSTON
The Inquisitor
LYNDA BELLINGHAM
King Yrcanos
BRIAN BLESSED
Sil
NABIL SHABAN
Kiv
CHRISTOPHER RYAN
Crozier
PATRICK RYECART
Matrona Kani
ALIBE PARSONS
Frax
TREVOR LAIRD
The Lukoser
THOMAS BRANCH
Tuza
GORDON WARNECKE
Mentor
RICHARD HENRY
Assistant Floor Manager
ANNA PRICE
Costumes
JOHN HEARNE
Designer
ANDREW HOWE-DAVIES
Incidental Music
RICHARD HARTLEY
Make-Up
DORKA NIERADZIK
Producer
JOHN NATHAN-TURNER
Production Assistant
KAREN JONES
Production Associate
ANGELA SMITH
JUNE COLLINS
Script Editor
ERIC SAWARD
Special Sounds
d*ck MILLS
Studio Lighting
DON BABBAGE
Studio Sound
BRIAN CLARK
Theme Arrangement
DOMINIC GLYNN
Title Music
RON GRAINER
Visual Effects
PETER WRAGG
COLIN BAKER
Peri
NICOLA BRYANT
The Valeyard
MICHAEL JAYSTON
The Inquisitor
LYNDA BELLINGHAM
King Yrcanos
BRIAN BLESSED
Sil
NABIL SHABAN
Kiv
CHRISTOPHER RYAN
Crozier
PATRICK RYECART
Matrona Kani
ALIBE PARSONS
Frax
TREVOR LAIRD
The Lukoser
THOMAS BRANCH
Tuza
GORDON WARNECKE
Mentor
RICHARD HENRY
Assistant Floor Manager
ANNA PRICE
Costumes
JOHN HEARNE
Designer
ANDREW HOWE-DAVIES
Incidental Music
RICHARD HARTLEY
Make-Up
DORKA NIERADZIK
Producer
JOHN NATHAN-TURNER
Production Assistant
KAREN JONES
Production Associate
ANGELA SMITH
JUNE COLLINS
Script Editor
ERIC SAWARD
Special Sounds
d*ck MILLS
Studio Lighting
DON BABBAGE
Studio Sound
BRIAN CLARK
Theme Arrangement
DOMINIC GLYNN
Title Music
RON GRAINER
Visual Effects
PETER WRAGG