02x15 - The X-Ray Story

[bunniefuu]

Okay, Fred. All together now. Upsy-daisy.

[thuds]

He's down again. Try again, Barney.

Hey, you ought to go on a diet, Fred. Barney, you got this coming to you.

Barney's doing a good job of keeping Fred active.

I'll say. Look at him now.

I'll get you, you little pip-squeak.

Fred, you're skating. You're skating.

I'm skating? [Barney] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wilma. I know, Betty. He's down again.

Fred, watch out. Fred, watch out.

You had to open your big mouth.

[horn honks]

[theme music playing]

[whistle chirps]

[siren wailing]

[whistle chirps]

[humming]

Wilma. Oh, Wilma.

[Wilma] Come on in, Betty. What are you doing, Wilma?

Oh, Dino's been off his feed for some reason.

So I'm trying to stimulate his appetite by reading the can label to him.

Oh? Oh.

Yeah.

[Wilma] Now listen to all the goodies in here, Dino.

"Shlump is the best food for your pet dinosaur because it contains chopped pterodactyl livers, tenderized crocodile ribs, saber-tooth tiger giblets, dried turtle egg yolks, "and sea serpent fillets."

Mm. Yummy, yum-yum!

Who could ask for anything more?

Dino's been raised on Shlump.

He's never turned it down before. Contains everything he needs.

We... We ought to fix a dinner of Shlump some night for Fred and Barney.

[giggling]

Dinosaurs and humans are different, Betty.

What's good for one isn't good for the other.

They're just different.

And I'm for keeping it that way. I'll make a deal with Dino.

He doesn't eat my New York cut steaks, and I'll leave his Shlump alone.

Don't joke, Betty. I'm worried.

[Betty] Oh, I'm sorry, Wilma.

[Wilma] Well, I'll open the can. He's just got to eat something.

Now, where did that can opener get to?

Oh, there it is.

You come down here.

Me and my big mouth. [squawking]

[snoring]

Here you are, Dino.

Now I want you to eat up all your Shlump, or I'll give it to the cat.

[screeches]

Please, Dino.

[groans]

There he goes into his bed again.

He hasn't eaten for two days. All he wants to do is sleep.

Well, you better get Dino to the vet's, Wilma.

Yeah. I'll call Fred. He'll take him over.

Attaboy. Up, up, up.

That's it. Up to the top.

Easy does it.

Good, good.

Oh, no. Hold it.

Hold it!

[Fred yells]

[man] Hey, Flintstone.

Yeah?

Your wife wants you on the phone.

That figures.

Here you are, Fred. Yeah, Wilma.

[Wilma speaking indistinctly] Oh, no. You're not interrupting a thing.

I'm just laying around doing nothing. [Wilma speaking indistinctly]

Dino? Yeah?

Won't eat his Shlump?

That does sound serious. Dino loves that stuff.

I wish you'd take him to the vet's, Fred, if you can drop what you're doing.

I've already dropped what I'm doing.

Okay. I'll be right home.

It was sure nice of my boss to lend me his brand-new car.

I'd never get home with that old clunker of mine.

Poor Dino. I wonder what's wrong with him.

Boy, what a hot rod this is. I'm practically home already.

I better remember to tell the boss his brakes grab a bit.

Oh, I'm so glad you're home, Fred. I can't figure out what's wrong with Dino.

Poor guy. Doesn't want to eat, huh?

I figured you'd be sympathetic with that, Fred.

Hello there, Dino boy.

Fred, pick him up. He'll knock everything off the shelves.

He hasn't lost any weight yet. That's a cinch.

Okay, Wilma. I'll take him over to the V-E-T.

[yapping]

Fred, you shouldn't have told him. You know he hates to go to the vet.

Well, I didn't think he could spell.

Come on, Dino. We go for a nice ride in the car.

Here's a seat, Dino. Just be patient until the doctor calls us.

You'll be okay.

I'm sorry. I didn't know I was sitting on your tail.

Mr. Flintstone. Yes, ma'am?

The doctor will see you now.

Well, well, well, he's a healthy-looking one.

Now, what seems to be wrong with him? He just won't eat.

Oh! Tsk, tsk. That's no good. And he's sleeping all the time.

Well, the poor animal might be tired.

Sometimes, you know, that makes them sleepy.

But I will examine him in the examination room.

Follow me, please.

First, we will take the photograph.

Say, that's quite a machine, doc. What is it?

That's our new Polarock x-ray camera machine.

It takes instant photographs.

Okay. Hold him steady, Mr. Flintstone.

So we get a good picture.

Und now, a simple turn of the dial.

Und here's the picture.

Ooh. Aah.

No wonder he's sleepy. Look.

He's got a dinopeptic germ.

[Fred] A dinopeptic germ?

Is that dangerous? No, no. All dinosaurs get it sometimes.

A few days' rest, und he'll be okay.

[Fred] Then he'll be all right.

Yeah, sure. Sure.

A dinopeptic germ is nothing to a dinosaur.

But if a human ever got it, then...

I'd rather not talk about it. It makes even the doctor squeamish.

Okay, Dino boy, let's go.

You were smarter than all of us, Dino. You were doing the right thing all the time.

Here, Miss Schultz. File the Flintstone x-ray away.

Yes, doctor.

Fred. F-L-I-N-T-S-T-O-N-E. Flintstone.

35 Cobblestone Road.

[doctor] Miss Schultz. Coming, Doctor.

Uh-oh. What's this? Somebody's x-ray.

Hey, I'd better take this down to the police laboratory.

I found it out on the street. Does it mean anything, doc?

Oh, yes. Yes. It means that this man, Fred Flintstone, has a dinopeptic germ in him.

A dinopeptic germ? Is that bad?

Well, well, it's something that dinosaurs get, and it's harmless to them.

But if a human gets one...

Oh, my, my, my. Well, I'd rather not talk about it.

It even makes us doctors squeamish. Oh!

Isn't there any cure, doc? Oh, yes, yes. Yes, indeed.

If the patient is kept awake and active for 72 hours, the dinopeptic germ conks out from frustration.

They can attack only when the patient is asleep.

Asleep?

Gee, I better call him right away. He might decide to take a nap.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh, my. No, no. He must not know.

The shock will be harmful. What should we do?

Well, I'll go myself and explain it to his wife.

It's the only way to save him. The only way. The only way.

Yeah, Dino's okay. The vet said he'd sleep it off, whatever it is.

[snoring]

[Wilma] Well, he's doing a good job of that.

Yeah, I think I'll go over and see if Barney's home yet.

Okay, Fred.

[door opens, then closes]

I better get dinner started.

[knocking on door]

That's someone at the back door. I wonder who that could be.

Mrs. Fred Flintstone?

Yes. I'm Dr. Sandstone. How are you?

Uh, before I answer that, am I being charged for this visit?

No, no. Oh, no, no.

Mrs. Flintstone, it's about your husband. Your husband.

I waited until you were alone to tell you.

Tell me. Tell me what?

What you must do to shake off dinopeptitis.

Dinopeptitis? What is that?

What is it? What is it? It's something that dinosaurs get, dinosaurs.

But this x-ray shows that your husband has it, but he can be saved, saved.

Saved? How?

You must see that he doesn't fall asleep for 72 hours.

Seventy-two hours!

And keep him active all the time. Then, he'll be okay.

Oh, I will. I will. Good, good, good.

Call me if you need me, and remember, you must keep him awake.

Oh, thank you, doctor. Oh, my goodness.

[Wilma] Oh, Betty! Yes, Wilma?

Can you come over a minute, Betty? Oh, sure. Be right there.

Dinopeptitis! Yes.

And to save Fred, I have to keep him active and awake for 72 hours.

And he doesn't know he's in danger? No. We don't dare tell him.

The doctor said the shock would be harmful.

Oh, well.

After dinner, Barney and I will be over, and we'll go out some place and we'll all help keep Fred awake for 72 hours.

Oh, thanks, Betty. You're both wonderful neighbors.

Betty, that was the best brontosaurus ribs I ever tasted.

Thank you, Barney.

Yeah, after a meal like that, a nap will be just the thing.

Get up from there, Barney. Why, Betty?

We're going out on the town tonight. You're kidding, Betty.

No. We're going out and whoop it up tonight with Wilma and Fred.

It's a gag, Betty. You can't mean it.

It's no gag. We have to do it for Fred. For Fred?

He's got a dinopeptic germ, and he must stay awake for 72 hours to get rid of it.

A dinopeptic germ? Hey, uh, what is it?

Well, it's... It's a... Well, it's dangerous. And Fred doesn't know he has it.

You mean you can have a dinopeptic germ and not know it?

Yes. Now, you sit down, and I'll explain it to you, Barney.

I get it. We've got to help Fred stay awake for 72 hours.

We have to help save him. Yeah.

Because Fred is a wonderful friend and neighbor.

Oh, he sure is.

And besides, he owes me 12 bucks.

Boy, what a day.

A boulder falls on me, Dino gives me a scare.

I'm glad it's over.

A hot shower... sure relaxes a guy.

I'll sure sleep tonight.

Now, into my pajamas, quick glance at the headlines, and then I will hit the sack.

Boy, this paper's heavy.

I'll just look at the sports page.

Fred should have been through by this time. I wonder what he's doing.

[yawns] Am I tired. I've never been so sleepy.

I better go see what's keeping him.

[snoring]

[Wilma] Fred!

[stammering] What happened? What happened?

Fred, you were closing your eyes.

Yeah. Yeah, that's right. I was closing my eyes. Right.

Have they passed a law against it?

Well, you can't.

Betty and Barney will be over any minute, and you're not dressed.

I'm dressed for where I'm going, bed.

You can't go to bed. We have a date. A date?

Yes. I told Betty that we'd go out with them tonight.

That's a laugh.

When I left Barney, he said he was hitting the sack early tonight.

[Barney] Yahoo! Aren't you ready yet, Fred?

We'll have a ball tonight, Freddie boy.

♪ Razzmatazz, rick y-tick y-tick y Sh-boom sh-boom sh-boom ♪ Barney, are you out of your peanut-size mind?

Stop, Fred.

You're wrinkling Barney's jacket.

You were too tired to go bowling tonight.

What happened?

Oh, well, I got my second wind, Fred.

Well, I can knock that out of you.

Stop it, Fred. And get dressed.

We haven't been out for ages and we're going out tonight.

I am tired, and I say we are staying home tonight!

Home. H-0-0-M-E.

[dance music playing]

Isn't this fun, Fred? Fun...

Fred, open your eyes. Fred.

Uh, yeah, yeah. Great, great, great. Great band. Great, great.

[snoring]

Well, Fred seems to be doing okay so far, Barney.

Barney!

Oh, yeah. Oh. Oh. Yeah, yeah, Betty.

Oh, I'm bushed, too.

Well, it's up to us to keep Fred awake, so snap out of it.

Okay, okay. I'm sorry.

[scat singing]

Fred, keep your eyes open. Everybody's looking.

He'll be okay for a while. [crashing]

[in unison] Fred!

[snoring]

Hey, come on, Fred. Drink another cup of coffee.

[mumbling incoherently]

Coffee keeps me awake. [gurgling]

Oh, we got a lot more stops to make.

[gulping]

[Betty] Come on, boys. Let's go.

♪ A rooty-toot-tooty and a skiddly-doo-doo ♪

♪ And a razzmatazz and a rooty-rooty-rooty Boom, boom, boom, sh-boom ♪

[groans] What is with you guys? Let's go home.

[lively music playing]

Come on, Fred. Come on, keep dancing.

This is the nuttiest thing I ever heard of.

Uh-oh. Hold it, Betty. Fred's down again. Hurry, Barney.

Black coffee coming up.

Quick, Barney. He's falling asleep.

[gulping and sputtering]

I... I... I don't want any coffee.

Come on, Fred. Just three more cups.

Remember, the night's still young.

[gulping]

Come on, Barney. Make him get out of the car.

He won't let go of the steering wheel.

Pull harder. We've got to keep him active.

[wood straining then cracking]

They're coming now.

That's a boy, Fred. We got some rocking and rolling to do.

What's with you guys? Have you all flipped?

I got to go to work tomorrow.

[lively music playing]

Come on, Fred. Just move your feet. Keep dancing.

Fred?

Fred.

Fred!

Hot stuff coming up, Fred.

Hurry, Barney.

Down the old hatch, Freddie pal.

Nice, hot coffee.

[groans] Oh, no, no, no. No more coffee.

That's it. Get him on his feet, Barney.

Yeah. Keep him active.

Come on, Fred. On your feet.

We're getting out of here.

All that coffee will keep you going now, Fred.

[coffee sloshing]

Put him in the car, Barney. The fresh air will do him good.

Uh, yeah. Come on, Fred. Okay. In you go. [thuds]

Oh, dear. He drank too much coffee.

It looks like one of them new Rockstone missiles.

How's about going home?

What are we trying to prove?

Just keep your eyes open. Please, Fred.

[Barney] Well, here we are, Fred.

[sighs] Home at last.

Barney, help Fred in, please.

Yeah. We'll see you inside, boys.

[yawns] Barney, Barney, Barney, I've never been so tired.

Just keep going, Fred. We'll be inside in a minute.

Boy, am I glad to be home.

Hold your foot up, Fred.

Oh, thank you. Thank you for putting my slippers on, Barney boy.

Fred's so groggy he doesn't even know Barney's putting skates on him.

I'm getting dead tired myself, Betty.

Me too, Wilma.

We'll sit this one out, huh?

Yeah. Barney can take care of Fred for a while.

Come on, Fred. Let's go.

Go, go? We just got here. Where are we going?

We're going skating, Fred.

Skating? I don't know how to skate.

Why didn't you say so, Fred? Well, you didn't ask me, you numbskull.

Fred's down again. Help him up, Barney.

I'm... I'm trying. I'm trying.

Okay, Fred. All together now. Upsy-daisy.

[thuds]

He's down again. Try again, Barney.

Hey, you ought to go on a diet, Fred. Barney, you got this coming to you.

Barney's doing a good job of keeping Fred active.

I'll say. Look at him now.

I'll get you, you little pip-squeak.

Fred, you're skating. You're skating.

I'm skating? [Barney] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wilma. I know, Betty. He's down again.

Fred, watch out. Fred, watch out.

[crashes]

You had to open your big mouth.

Get up, Fred, before you fall asleep.

And what's wrong with falling asleep?

I can't figure out what you all are up to.

But it's all over. I'm going home and go to bed.

And from the looks of you hotshots, you could use some rest too.

Any of you middle-aged teenagers want a ride, come along.

He won't get far. I siphoned the gas out of his car.

Oh, boy. Out of gas. I'll never get any sleep.

[Barney] So what, Fred?

We're walking home just for the exercise, anyhoo.

[Barney] Yep. Walking can be fun. Right, Fred?

[Fred mumbling incoherently]

How are you going to keep Fred awake for 72 hours, Wilma?

I don't know, but we just have to or else, the doctor said.

That's it, Fred. Keep walking and don't close your eyes.

Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure, sure, Barney.

Oh, Thank goodness we're home, Wilma. My feet are k*lling me.

Home? Oh, boy. My bed.

Wait, Fred. Wait!

Beddy-bye, here I come. Wilma, he's going to bed.

Come on, Betty. [Betty] Come on, Barney.

No, no, no, let me sleep.

Come on, Fred. On your feet.

It's for your own good, Fred. You've got to stay awake.

Let's give him a cold shower. Maybe that will snap him out of it.

Hey, that's a good idea, Wilma.

All set over here. Holler when you're ready.

[Wilma] Okay. He's in the shower. One cold shower coming up.

Let him have it.

[Fred yells]

What's the big idea? You trying to freeze me to death?

I just thought you might like a shower before going to bed, dear.

You thought I might like a shower before going to bed, dear.

Well, If I wanted one, I would...

[Barney] Uh-oh. There he goes again. [Wilma] Catch him, Barney, quick.

I got him. I got him.

Bring me some toothpicks, Wilma. I got an idea.

Are you sure it will work, Barney? [Barney] Positive. Watch.

Hello, Fred.

Oh, hi, Barney.

See, the toothpicks keep his eyes open. Pretty neat, huh?

Uh-oh. His eyelids are too heavy.

We got to keep him awake. Barney, he mustn't fall asleep.

How about making some noise?

I have an old horn from last New Year's Eve.

Oh, sure. Sure. That's it. I should have thought of that in the first place.

Happy New Year, Fred.

[horn blasting]

It's no use, girls. I can't keep him awake.

[Wilma] Don't go to sleep, Fred! His eyes are closing fast.

You'll have to tell him what the trouble is, Wilma.

It's the only thing to do. It will give him a fighting chance.

You're right. Fred, can you hear me?

Oh, yes, yes, I hear you.

The doctor. Got that, Fred?

Doctor showed me your x-ray.

[mumbling] Understand?

Doctor, doctor, x-ray. I understand, yeah.

Hey, I saw a movie like this, once.

Oh, this girl took sleeping pills and... Oh, quiet, Barney.

The doctor says if you fall asleep...

The doctor says if I fall asleep...

You're a goner. I'm... I'm... I'm a goner.

You get it? You're a goner.

I... I get it. I'm... I'm... I'm a goner.

Good night.

I'm a goner! Did you hear that?

I'm... I'm a goner.

Don't just stand there. Help me. Do something.

Keep me awake, Barney. Get me some coffee. Lots of coffee.

Coming, Fred. Coming. Coffee coming up.

Oh, thanks, Barney. Thank you.

That's what the doctor said. I got to stay awake.

Or I'm a goner. The doctor said that.

The doctor?

What doctor?

Hold it. Hold it!

What's the matter, Fred?

Wilma, what doctor told you that I had to stay awake?

The doctor who had your x-ray, Fred.

My x-ray? I never had an x-ray.

Yes, you did. Here, it's got your name on it.

That's why we had to keep you awake.

You had a dinopeptic germ.

[Fred] A dinopeptic germ?

Oh, no, no, no!

What's the matter, Fred? This is Dino's x-ray.

Dino's? [Fred] Yes, Dino's.

You mean we kept you awake all night for nothing?

Oh, Fred, we're sorry.

Hold it. Hold it. Hold it. We can all save our apologies for the morning.

I wouldn't want to wake him up for that.

[snoring]

[Wilma and Betty] Isn't that cute?

[theme music playing]

[yawns]

Wilma!

Wilma!

Come on, Wilma, open this door!

Wilma!