01x23 - The Float

[bunniefuu]

[instrumental music]

Am I good? Is it clear?

I can't tell.

I'm clear.

[cars honking]

Not clear.

What's that idiot doing

in my blind spot?

Everyone's in your blind spot.

This car is nothing
but blind spots.

It's not a car,
it's a parade float.

Now, am I clear?

I don't know. All I see
is a giant foot.

It's not a giant foot

it's a giant flipper.

That's it. I'm going for it!

[tires screeching]

[screaming]

Great. Now we have to go
to the car wash.

Oh, no. I'm getting out here.

What are you crazy?

You're on the side of a freeway!

It's dangerous!

Not as dangerous as riding
in that thing.

Suit yourself.

[engine revving]

Am I clear?

I'm going for it!

[cars honking]

[theme music]

Look! There goes our car.

Is that a parade float?

It's not a parade float.

It's myparade float. Tsk.

Is it made out of paper mache?

Papier-mache,yes.

What will happen
when it gets wet?

It's gonna get wet?

[instrumental music]

[alarm blaring]

Turn off the water!
Turn off the water!

Turn off the water!

[music continues]

[whirring]

[screaming]
Stop!

Turn off the water!
Turn off the water!

[alarm blaring]

[music continues]

[grunting]

[whirring]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[music continues]

[grunting]

[whirring]

[music continues]

[whimpering]

[instrumental music]

(Daffy)
'My eye! My eye!'

- 'Oh, my eye!'
- Daffy? D-don't move!

- I'm getting the first aid kit.
- 'No! No!'

[whimpering]

Let me see your eye!

It's all that's left.

M-my beautiful parade float
is gone!

We-we never
even got to be in a parade.

[dramatic music]

You gonna be okay?

[door shuts]

He'll be okay.

Probably just needs
a little time.

[Daffy sobbing]

[sobbing continues]

[sobbing continues]

[sobbing continues]

[sobbing continues]

[Daffy sobbing]

Maybe that's enough time.

- Daffy?
- Huh! Bugs!

I knew it!

I knew you'd come through
for me!

I knew if I stayed in here
long enough

and sobbed loud enough

you'd make me
another parade float!

It wasn't easy. There were days
when I wanted to give up.

When I wanted to come
out of my room

maybe take a shower

but I persevered.

I stayed in my room

and I sobbed even louder

because I knew that you needed

that time and that motivation.

And I was right.

Thank you, brother!

So where is it? Where's my new
beautiful parade float?

I didn't make you
a parade float.

[thudding]

I'm fine.

I'm disappointed, but I'm fine.

Why can't you just
drive a normal car?

Normal cars
are for normal people.

I'm not normal!

I'll give you that.

You're my best friend.

You know me better than anyone.

You see
what a horrible person I am.

That's why I have to drive
a parade float.

To distract the rest
of the world from seeing it!

You're gonna need something
better than a parade float.

Better than a parade float?

Betterthan a parade float.

[instrumental music]

I'll take it.

(Daffy)
'Not since my parade float'

have I felt that a vehicle

so expressed my essence.

How much?

Three hundred
and seventy five thousand.

- Dollars?
- Yes.

American dollars?

I'm not giving you
$375,000 for a yacht.

But you're my best friend.

That's what best friends do.

No, they don't.

Fair enough.

Will you give me $375,000

which I will donate

to the charity of my choice?

Daffy, no one's
gonna give you $375,000.

O-of course,
I'll give you $375,000.

I knew I could count on you,
Porky.

Y-you poor thing.

I d-didn't even know
you were sick.

B-but when's the operation?

Tonight, so, uh,
let's wrap this up.

Can I ask why you d-didn't
go to Bugs for the money?

Because you're my best friend.

I know that I can ask you
for anything.

Just as you know that
you can ask me for anything.

Could you turn on
that lamp for me?

I-I can't see the combination.

Do it yourself.

[safe unlocks]

'Here you go.'

[sniffing]

This is only $350,000.

B-but it's all I have.

Porky, you are making
this very hard for me.

Do you think I like
having to come

to my best friend for money?

Can you imagine
what this is like for me?

How awkward this is?

What's that?
In the back of the safe?

A gold watch?

But that was my
g-great grandfather's.

"Randall Pig?"
It's engraved?

That's gonna k*ll
its resale value!

I'm gonna need more than this.

Give me your debit card.

B-but that's the money
I live on.

Porky, I can't sit here
and argue with you.

The surgery's, like,
in ten minutes.

You're right.
T-take the debit card.

Take the debit card, what?

Uh, t-take the debit card,
please?

Fine. As a favor to you,
I'll take the debit card.

What is this, wool? Alright,
I guess I'll take the coat, too.

Maybe I can get a couple
of bits for this.

Uh, f-f-feel better!

W-wait a second.

N-now, how am I gonna live?

[instrumental music]

Whoo-hoo!

I'm free!

I've never felt so alive!

The high seas!
The wind in my hair!

The salt on my skin!

I am a sailor!

I am sailing!

What an unbelievable rush!

Whoo-hoo!

[instrumental music]

[Porky whimpering]

Porky? What are you doing?

E-eating garbage.

Is, uh, that something
you've always done

or is that a new thing?

A-are you gonna finish that?

I tried calling you, but
your
phone's been disconnected.

Why is it so dark
in here, and cold?

- I-I couldn't pay my bills.
- Why not?

I-I gave all my money to Daffy.

Why would you give
all your money to Daffy?

Uh, f-for his kidney transplant.

D-do you know how he's doing?

Let's go find out.

[instrumental music]

Aahh.

I should have bought a yacht
with Porky's money years ago.

[dramatic music]

Nice boat.

She's a real beauty, isn't she?

"The Queen of the Ocean."
That's why I named her that.

'A fitting name
for the successor'

'to my parade float.'

Which by the way was also named

"Queen of the Ocean."

- How's the kidney?
- Kidney?

[laughing]
Oh, I just told Porky that

so he'd give me the money
for the yacht.

[Porky screaming]

[both grunting]

Mm. Good shrimp.

[instrumental music]

♪ You like antiques
I like flee markets ♪

♪ You like cheese
but I like chocolates ♪

♪ I know one way
we can solve this ♪

♪ It's called fondue
it has both ♪

♪ I like ficus
you like ferns ♪

♪ We put them in matching urns ♪

♪ And the silly thing
we learned ♪

♪ Is now they're friends ♪

♪ Those plants are friends ♪

♪ You like red and I like blue ♪

♪ You like me and I like you ♪

♪ There's nothing else to do
but be best friends ♪

♪ We're best friends we're best
friends we're best friends ♪

♪ Our friendship
will never end ♪

♪ If we were divers
we'd get the bends ♪

♪ We're such deep friends ♪

♪ Sometimes we disagree ♪

♪ We must monitor our chi
and realign our energy ♪

♪ We are best friends ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ Lee lee lee ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ Le le le ♪

- Dance break!
- Splendid! After you!

Oh, no, I insist,
you're a much better dancer.

- Oh, you flatter me.
- Not at all.

- Okay, dance break's over.
- Never mind.

♪ You like toning up
your lats ♪

♪ I like wearing
my new spats ♪

♪ It don't get no
better than that ♪

♪ When you're best friends
you're best friends ♪

♪ You like gray
and I like beige ♪

♪ Luckily for us
there's greige ♪

♪ Which is a lovely
combination ♪

♪ Of gray and beige ♪

♪ You like designer boots ♪

♪ I like velvet
warm-up suits ♪

♪ In that way
we're in cahoots ♪

♪ We're best friends
we're best friends ♪

♪ You like red and I like blue ♪

♪ You like me and I like you ♪

♪ There's nothing else to do ♪

♪ But be best friends ♪

♪ Be best friends ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la la ♪

♪ We are best friends ♪

[Daffy grunting]

[instrumental music]

[screaming]

[glass shatters]

Ooh!

Wait!

That's a Tiffany lamp.

T-that you bought with my money!

[grunts]

H-how could you l-l-lie to me?

I'm sorry, I thought if I
told
you what the money was for

you wouldn't give it to me.

I w-w-wouldn't have!

You just proved my point!

How am I the bad guy here?

[grunting]

[grunting]

Okay, I've had enough.

[Daffy screaming]

Well, maybe just one more.

[instrumental music]

Alright, break it up.

Here's what we're gonna do.

Daffy, you're gonna
sell this thing

and give Porky his money back.

Are you crazy?

I already lost my parade float!

I'm not about to lose my yacht.

[sighs]

[instrumental music]

Well, you're about to lose
a friend.

Yeah, but those are easy to get
when you have a yacht.

'Uh, guys?'

(Daffy)
'Where's the dock?'

But that's impossible.

I tied a shank knot
to this cleat

'tied a sheepshead knot here'

'a double rolling hitch here'

a simple yet elegant bow here
and a square knot here.

Uh-huh. And what kind of knot
did you tie to the dock?

[instrumental music]

[crying]
W-what are we gonna do?

We-we're stranded in the
mi-mi-middle of the ocean!

[crying]
I always knew
I'd di-die this way!

Alright. Let's not panic.

We'll just put up the sail
and sail back.

[squawking]

- Where's the sail?
- I didn't get one.

- W-wh-what?
- I didn't have enough money.

I was forced to choose
between a sail

and this Jacuzzi.

So if anyone's to blame,
it's Porky.

I gave you everything I had.
I'm c-completely broke!

The fact that you're not
more financially successful

is not my fault.

Ugh!

What? Is it me?
It's him, right?

We'll just radio
the coast guard for help.

- Nope. No radio.
- What?

There wasn't enough money.

Not after I got
the second Jacuzzi.

I have an idea. Let's all take
a long hot soak in the Jacuzzi.

It will relax us,
which will allow us

to think of a way
out of our predicament.

I'll take the master Jacuzzi.
You two take that one.

'Ha. Ah! Ooh! Ah. Ohh!'

'Ahh. Ahh. Ahh.'

I think I have our answer.

Porky should swim back
and get help.

- Off you go, Porky.
- H-hey, what are you doing?

S-stop! What-what do you think
you're doing?

No one's swimming anywhere.

We're sailing back.

[instrumental music]

Where'd you get a sail?

- It's your bed sheets.
- What?

Those are 1,500 thread count
Egyptian cotton!

Do you know how much
these sheets cost?

More than lifejackets!

That's why there are
no lifejackets on board!

Well, that
and they make you look
stupid.

[instrumental music]

[screaming]

He's unconscious!
W-what should we do?

[instrumental music]

[whispering]
Psst, Porky, untie me.

I-I can't. I'm under
d-direct orders not to.

You know, Porky, being out here
in the middle of the ocean

has really made me
revaluate some things.

I see now, that it's not money
or things that matter.

It's friends, best friends.

And you, Porky Pig

you are my best friend.

Do you r-really mean it?

Have you ever known me to lie?

Y-yes. You lied about n-needing
a kidney transplant.

That's in the past.

Now, please, untie me.

So I can give my best friend

a great big hug.

You won't regret this.

Now, go swim and get help.

[screaming]

Porky!

[instrumental music]

Well, I guess it's just me now.

All alone on a yacht.

Stranded in the middle
of the ocean

with no lifejackets
and no idea how to sail.

Bugs! Porky!
Wait for me!

[gasps]

Hmm.

These are coming with me.

Mm. It's like being
caressed by an angel.

[instrumental music]

I regret nothing!

Except not buying
those lifejackets!

[gasps]

It was a dream.

It was all a dream.

That explains why I was such
a horrible person

and did all those
horrible things.

(Bugs)
'Ehh..'

...not a dream.

You are a horrible person

and you did do those
horrible things.

Then what happened?

We were picked up
by a passing ship.

You nearly drowned
in your stupid bed sheets.

What about "The Queen
of the Ocean?" Did she survive?

Yeah. It was towed
back to shore.

Ah. Oh, thank goodness!

It is things that matter!
This proves it!

We sold it
and got Porky's money back.

Ohh-ho-ho!

I've good news and bad news.

The good news is
there's no complications

from the near drowning.

The bad news is,
we ran some tests

and it looks like
you're gonna need..

...a kidney transplant.

Huh! Ironic. How much
does one of those cost?

I don't know, about $375,000.

but I'm sure you have insurance.

Shhhh..

Well, I may not have insurance

but at least
I have a best friend.

Right, Bugs and/or Porky?

[instrumental music]

I see you decided to rebuild
your parade float.

Well, I couldn't ask
my best friend to do it

not after you paid
for my kidney transplant.

Don't mention it.

Shame they couldn't also
throw in a brain transplant.

I won't forget this!

It was a tremendous act
of generosity!

And I shall forever be
in your debt!

Uh, Daffy, uh,
can I take a break?

I-I'm still not feeling
a hundred since the-the surgery.

Oh, here we go.

How many times are you
gonna throw it in my face

that you gave me your kidney?

You still have the other one!

I-I gotta get a new best friend.

[instrumental music]

[theme music]

Psst.
Hey, you wanna buy a watch?