02x10 - This Land Is Your Land

[bunniefuu]

Previously, on "Good Girls."

He left me, and he took my kids.

- What do you want?
- I want you done.

I want my family safe.

How's it going with the sister?

- I'm out of the friend zone.
- Already?

Do you, like, live here now?

Because you're here,
like, a lot.

I'm a D-bag, so I know
when I see one.

Well, I stole from my last job.

- What did you steal?
- Money. Lots of it.

We are so much more alike
that you could ever know.

Feds, they opened up an IA
deal or whatever.

I literally have no idea
what you're saying.

- Internal Affairs, okay?
- They investigate dirty cops.

Did you remove a pen cap
from the evidence locker?

- I failed.
- Like, inconclusive?

Capital F, failed.

Did he do what they said he did?

- Yes.
- Then he should stay in jail.

- It's over. They got me.
- I'm out on leave.

- I'm done.
- Is that right?

- No more cash. No more pills.
- It's over.

- Which part?
- All of it.

Bring the children home, okay?

It's cost me everything
at this point.

But my...

rock bottom or whatever, um...

was when I lost my family.

♪

♪

The thing is, you have
no idea how far you've fallen

until you get some distance.

♪

I've had cops in my kitchen.

I've...

♪

Taken my kids to a cr*ck house.

♪

I've lied. I've cheated.
I've stolen.

I've had a g*n to my head
so many times

that it doesn't even
scare me anymore.

A full clip adds a pound.

It's like...

why do I know that?

I shouldn't know that.

♪

♪

♪ Oh, Lord, I've lost it now

♪

♪

I just have to stop.

I want to be normal.

♪

And I can't lose my kids again.

My name is Beth.

And I am an addict.

All: Hi, Beth.

I'm going to need one of
you here and one of you here,

and I'll hold down the middle
over here with the goodies.

Who's on masks?

Uh, how about a big leaf?

- Or a fluffy turkey?
- Ooh, Indian headdress.

- Not cool,
- Why not?

It's cultural appropriation.

Both: Oh.
- Mm-hmm.

Why don't we
avoid any land mines

and just keep this fall themed?

- Oh, thank God you're back.
- Right?

Where's our homegirl been?

Life got a little crazy
for a second.

All I got to say
is Carol filled in for you.

- Oh, do not.
- She didn't want to do themes.

- For the parties?
- It was nuts.

Oh, speaking of which.

Okay, so we have
acorn thumbprints,

and see, the Hershey kiss
is the little acorn.

Oh, that's so cute.

And we got turkey cake pops.

We've got little squirrely
sweet treats,

and I cannot with
this pretzel tail.

- Stop!
- Beth!

Can you even?

And then, we've got

Gobble Gobble Maple Crumble.

- Oh, wait.
- Uh...

- What?
- Um, those look like

- walnuts on top.
- So?

- Oh, walnuts are nuts.
- Well, they're not peanuts.

- Nut family.
- Well, who in

our class is allergic?

- Uh, Cooper doesn't like them.
- Right.

- Well, that's not an allergy.
- And you know what else?

All of this...

- filled with gluten.
- Oh, my God.

I mean, where are the
gluten issues in Africa?

Or Brazil?
Or anywhere except for here?

- Right?
- Oh, you're bad.

What happened to you?

I like it.

- Let's live a little.
- Okay!

Annie Marks,
please report to produce.

We can never sell this lettuce.

Hey, question.

- What do you think is worse?
- The sex or the pesticides?

Um, does our insurance
cover puberty blockers?

- I think that ship has sailed.
- Has it?

Yeah, honey, you're a woman now.

Mm, it's for my kid.

It's kind of, like the next
step, and he's really stoked.

- Uh-huh.
- So, you know.

Look, well, I'll check,
but we are Fine and Frugal.

- Mm-hmm.
- Emphasis on the "frugal."

- Mm, right.
- Yeah.

But you know,
I could pick up extra shifts

or I could... you know,
I'd mop the butcher floor

or unclog toilets, or...
You know, whatever.

I'm just saying,
something to think about.

Mm-hmm.

Well, come on, I'm still down.

Yeah, blood, bathrooms,
your child's trans journey...

- It's, uh...
- It's a lot of imagery.

Yeah.

I can... I can look
at the schedule.

- Thanks, boss.
- Okay?

Uh...

Hey, uh...

what about your
extracurriculars?

- Oh.
- Those are over.

Huh. Why?

It's... it's, like,
a whole thing with my sister.

That sucks.

How bad do you need the money?

Kale.

Hmm.

- Guilty?
- That's what he wants.

Why?

I'm... I'm just another file
in his stack, Ruby.

I mean, you should see this guy.

He'd rather go play
racquetball or golf.

The court-appointed ones
can't afford golf.

Well, that's what it is.

Then we'll get you
a real lawyer.

You know how much that costs?

Stan, you're not
pleading guilty.

Babe, do you want to eat
or keep the lights on?

Because that's where
we are this month.

Okay, I got no paycheck
coming in.

I can't even get my old job
back at the mall

because they think I'm a fel...

That better not be a phone.

Hey, you got your ears on,
Journey Scout?

Excuse you, miss.

Your father is speaking to you.

Hey.

No phones during homework, baby.

- And no pop after dinner.
- Oh, my bad.

I didn't think we still
followed rules around here.

Oh, you're gonna have
your hands full.

What are you talking about?

When I go away.

♪

- It's cheating.
- It's fine.

- It's an affair.
- Oh, come on.

What do you call it?

It's maybe an emotional affair,

which is, like,
barely even a thing.

- Hoda says that's worse.
- Oh.

You know, we're doing Beth
a favor.

How's that?

You don't take
an alcoholic to a bar.

How's this even going to work?

We just keep the trains running.

Without the dealership?

Well, I'm kicking around
some ideas.

♪

- You are?
- I am.

Well, as long
as it doesn't involve

- shoving anything up our...
- Sara needs her badges, right?

- Oh, hell, no!
- Okay, will you just chill?

I'm not going to let you
shove things up my child's...

- Bus!
- What?

Customs is never going to search

a bus full of Journey Scouts.

I mean, they're
practically nuns.

Jesus.

Oh, I'm sorry,
what was your idea again?

- Because I'm open.
- I don't know.

Mm, shocking.

That was Beth's thing.

Or...

Or?

Or we locate a travelling circus

and we find the elephants
or whatever

the largest mammals are
we can find

and we cram the pills
up one of their...

Hey, ladies.

♪

So how are we going to do this?

So it's about a dead girl?

No, she gets in an accident,
and when she wakes up,

she has no memory and she has
to sort of start her life over.

So it's a medical mystery thing?

More like she has to sort of
figure out who she wants to be.

Do you actually
see the accident?

Because I am not
good with blood.

Mm, probably can't see anything

because it's a book.

Oh, thank you, professor.

Hey, is it on Netflix?

- Hey, you guys wash up.
- We're going to eat.

So you're totally okay
with all this?

What?

You know... actual book club?

I mean...

what about you guys?

- Well, kind of miss the money.
- Not going to lie.

- Yeah, how's Stan's lawyer?
- Super. Real shark.

Well, maybe when the dealership

gets back on its feet,
I could pitch in and...

Hey, we'll get by.

How do you think
he's going to do it?

- Without us?
- Oh, I don't know.

There's always some idiot

willing to do
something stupid for money.

So, do you guys want to
come to book club or not?

Ooh, gee, we would but...

- we kind of have, like, a thing.
- Oh.

Otherwise, I would totally love

to pretend to have read it.

- All right, you guys.
- Come and get it.

You want your service badge
or not?

Why do we have to go to Canada?

Because that's where
the nursing home is.

Can't we visit one here?

Old people are lonelier there.

Because of socialized medicine?

- Yeah.
- Wait, that makes no sense.

- Okay, you know what?
- Bed time.

- Daddy will be in for prayers.
- No thanks.

To Daddy or prayers?

- Both.
- Excuse you.

We're just going to act
like we're good people now?

We are good people.

He stole, you lied,

and I still can't borrow
the neighbor's Internet.

- Sara Louise Hill...
- It makes about as much sense

as going to Canada
to get my service badge.

♪

Green for grass or blue for sky?

What about red?

- For what?
- Like a sunset?

I mean, it's a balloon.

We don't have to
be literal, right?

- Let's do green.
- For grass.

Leaves or pumpkins?

Leaves.

Maple or oak?

Oak.

Brown or tan?

Turkeys or corn st*lks?

♪ I know you think
I'm a psychopath ♪

Beth?

♪ A Democrat lurking
in the dark ♪

- What?
- Turkeys or corn st*lks?

♪ Cirque du trash,
I kept the stash ♪

- Turkey.
- Mm.

- Corn st*lks.
- ♪ Cocoa candy

♪ Straight from Japan

Are they too sexual?

Oh, yeah, that's, uh...

♪ I know you know
what I need to get by ♪

You know what
the sixth grade started?

- What?
- Mom's night out.

- ♪ Mind
- ♪ Mind

- They watched "Magic Mike."
- No!

- ♪ Something for your
- What, with the kids there?

- ♪ Mind
- No, they were at Brooke's.

- We have to do that.
- Throw in some margaritas.

- Let's get loose!
- ♪ Mind

♪ Something
for your mind ♪

♪ Mind

♪ Mind, mind

♪ Something for your

♪ Mind

♪ Mind, mind

♪ Something for your,
for your ♪

♪ M-I, M-I,
M-I ♪

♪ M-I-N-D

♪ For us, the bourgeoisie

♪ So carefree

♪ Remember when we?

♪ I don't know what
you need to get by ♪

♪ Something for your mind
♪ Mind

- ♪ Mind
- ♪ Mind

- ♪ Mind
- ♪ Mind

♪ Something for your

♪ Mind, mind, mind

♪

Beth?

Are you coming?

- ♪ Mind
- ♪ Mind

- ♪ Mind
- ♪ I-N-D

Boy, once again,
I am really sorry.

I... you know, we don't have
a lot of control

over what happens
to these things

once they're put on the shelves,

but if you head over
to customer service,

they'll give you a full refund.

And you have
a fine and frugal day.

You know, these people
need to lighten up.

She just got a half
a cigarette for free.

- That's actionable.
- Mm.

Hey, um...

is there any way I can have
the day off tomorrow?

- Everything okay?
- Yeah, I, uh...

Took your advice,
and I have an extracurricular.

- Model UN?
- Something like that.

Yeah, you go, Kofi.

Did you just make
a Kofi Annan reference?

- I did.
- I love you.

When you make...

references to former
world leaders.

- Mm-hmm.
- Also, he's dead.

I'm gonna dip.

Hey.

I love...

I love that you
said his name right.

There's just so much
to love about Kofi.

Well, he redefined the UN.

- I'm going to go.
- Go.

The pills come across the
border right here in Detroit.

There is a wide range,

some of them controlled,
all of them prescription-grade.

They distro through a
sophisticated street network.

- How you want to play it?
- I think it's go time.

We hit them fast, hit them hard.

Ladies and gentlemen,
you heard the man.

Let's get this party started.

- You hanging in?
- Yeah, I just want it over.

Burritos on you tomorrow night.

Great.

♪ This
is the song that never ends ♪

♪ It will go on and on,
my friend ♪

♪ Some people started singing
it ♪

♪ Not knowing what it was

♪ And they'll continue singing
it forever just because... ♪

- Who is that?
- One of my mom's friends.

- Come on!
- ♪ It will go on and on...

And we can do it in a round,
so you go...

♪ It will go on and on my...

And then, you go
♪ It will go on and on

♪ My friends

♪ Started singing it

♪ Not knowing what it was

♪ And they'll continue
singing it forever, just... ♪

How about you stop now?

How about you chill out?

We're not at camp.

Doesn't mean we can't have fun.

Let's just do this
without getting...

arrested.

Okay.

Can I get a juice box?

Well, I don't know, can you?

Yes, you may.

Have a juice box.
Enjoy.

- So why are you here?
- Are you kidding me?

- I was big in all that.
- What badges did you get?

Like, almost every single one.

I only had to drop out
because I got knocked up.

Seriously?

Well, actually, I only
made it to Brown Birds.

But Beth, she went all the way.

♪ Song that never...

You, uh... you okay?

Fall festival and book club.

- Book-club book club.
- Yes, got it.

Careful, they're hot.

So you want to
stop by work tomorrow

and check out the new promo?

- Can you take Kenny to swim?
- Sure.

Yeah, you can tell Linda
that I'll stop by.

I will.

So, do you miss it?

I don't need
to be there every day.

I'm not talking about
the dealership.

Would it matter if I did?

This is delicious.

♪

♪ This land
is your land ♪

♪ This land is my land

♪ From California

♪ To the New York island

♪ From the Redwood Forest

♪ To the Gulf Stream waters

♪ This land was made
for you and me ♪

♪

I'm looking for a Beth Boland.

♪

You found her.

♪ I saw below me

♪ That golden valley

♪ This land was made
for you and me ♪

♪ When the sun came shining

♪ And I was strolling

♪ And the wheat fields waving
and the dust clouds rolling ♪

♪ And the fog was lifting

♪ A voice was chanting

♪ This land was made
for you and me ♪

♪ As I went walking

♪ I saw a sign there

♪ And on the sign it
said "no trespassing" ♪

♪ But on the other side

♪ It didn't say nothing

♪ That side was made
for you and me ♪

♪ In the shadow
of the steeple ♪

♪ I saw my people

♪ By the relief office,
I've seen my people ♪

♪ As they stood there hungry

♪ I stood there asking

♪ Is this land made
for you and me? ♪

♪ Nobody living

♪ Can ever stop me

♪ As I go walking

♪ That freedom highway

♪ Nobody living

♪ Can ever
make me turn back ♪

♪ This land was made
for you and me ♪

And I'm thankful for waffles
and Missy, my doll.

And that my mom doesn't
go to work as much

so she can play with me.

These are the moments
you just can't miss, right?

Right.

- Oh, I didn't even go there.
- Oh, God.

But you know what?
She is so great.

- Sorry to interrupt.
- Oh, my God.

Jane was the most adorable
thing I've ever seen.

Yeah, she's hilarious.

What happened to
all the stuff I made?

The cupcakes and the crumble?

- Oh, um...
- Oh.

- Right.
- Beth, we just got

a little nervous
about the nut thing.

Yeah, and not to mention
all that gluten.

Yeah, so we had Trish
run out to Kroger

- just to be safe.
- They were gorgeous, though.

And we had them all wrapped up
so you can take them home.

So, um, I was thinking.

How about a mom night
in early January?

Well, actually,
February might be better

- because of the winter carnival.
- That work for you, Beth?

Beth?

♪

♪

♪

♪

- We're good?
- Locked and loaded.

Uh, hey, guys.

Here, pass these out
for me, would you?

Thank you.

All right, I think I'm
going to pee again.

I really like the toilets here.
They're so high up.

What's your secret?

Sorry?

When mine was their age,

she was already smoking dope
and stealing cars.

Well, give her a minute.

- Mm-mm, I don't think so.
- Not that one.

She taught me Snapchat.

- I am so sorry.
- She's patient.

Well, she just
came out like that.

That's not how it works, honey.

I had eight.

No wonder you're in a chair.

Well, whatever you're doing,
it's working.

Bye.

Passports.

Here you go.

- Quick trip today?
- Oh, yeah.

You know, just keeping up
international relations.

They just earned
their service badge

at Mallard Pond Senior Center.

Would you like some water?

Thanks for your service, girls.

- See?
- Piece of cake.

I took it all out.

- Back on the bus in ten.
- Stick with your buddies.

That goes for you, too, Karen.

- I panicked, okay?
- No.

- I couldn't do it.
- No, no, no, no, no!

We're supposed to be making
them better people, not this.

- What did you do with them?
- In the garbage at the place.

Oh, my God, you left
our payday in a trash can?

- We could have gotten caught.
- But we didn't.

With a bunch of dr*gs
in front of Sara.

It was the perfect plan.

You know if Beth
had suggested this,

you would have been all in.

Like I'm some kind of yes-man?

"Hey, Ruby, want to rob
a grocery store?"

"Sure, Beth."
"Hey, Ruby.

Want to drink some gasoline?"
"Yeah, sounds yum, Beth.

- Pour it in my mouth."
- Okay, you know what...

But of course, when I come up
with a sound solution...

Oh, you mean this
or up an elephant ass?

Yes, I put two viable options
on the table,

and all you had to do
was choose one.

- You know what?
- You're right.

You're not Beth.
You never will be.

- You know what you are?
- Please.

- You're a child.
- You do whatever you want

- whenever you want.
- I take risks, Ruby.

Without thinking about
anyone else but yourself.

Just because I didn't choose
some safe-ass,

boring-ass life like my sister...

- You know why she did that?
- Because she had to.

She didn't have anyone to
clean up after her like you do.

- That's not true.
- She has been

mopping up your messes
since the day I met you.

I'm really glad that I can be

such a convenient excuse
for everyone.

What does that even mean?

Well, now when Stan
goes to jail,

you'll have someone else
to blame.

Anyone want dibs on a Slim Jim?

The machine gave me two.

You sang songs and braided hair?

Ugh, it's, like, a troop thing.

That's terrifying.

♪ This is the song
that never ends ♪

- Stop.
- ♪ It will go on and on

♪ My friend
Oh, my God.

- Go on, open the drawer.
- Come on.

Okay, okay.

- You like-y?
- Why?

Well, I mean, you needed
new ones anyway.

They look expensive.

Nah, they came in a three-pack.

They're dope.

The, um...

The medicine might have to wait.

It's just...
It costs so much more

than I have right now, you know?

Okay.

I'm sorry.

I'm going to get something
to drink.

Hey, um...

am I a mess?

I just mean, like,
relative to the other moms.

Medium.

Seriously?

Here's the thing:
most private school kids

think their parents are perfect.

They're going to be
majorly freaked out

when they realize they're not.

Hm.

But with you, I already
know what I'm dealing with.

So I'm, like, not that damaged.

Thanks.

- Want anything to drink?
- I'm okay.

♪

That bad, huh?

So they suck your soul out yet
or what?

What are you doing here?

- I tried calling.
- I blocked your number.

Damn, that's cold.

I'm sure you'll get over it.

I just wanted to make sure

you were in the loop
about stuff.

Well don't, okay?

Okay.

So you're all good, then?

I'm good.

I'm great.

All right, then, yeah.

You don't... you don't got
to know about this, then.

Know what?

What?

- Where are they?
- What?

- The books, Dean.
- They're not in the cabinet.

- What's going on?
- Where are the books?

- Uh, they're...
- They're in accounting.

- Not those books.
- The book club books.

Why?

♪ The night
would never end ♪

♪ In your sleep,
you called me Natalie ♪

♪ It was the nicest
thing you said ♪

Everybody down on the ground.

FBI!

♪

Don't move!

- Where is she?
- Who?

Sir!

♪ You said I live
for tragedy ♪

Don't hurt her!

♪ So I threw the keys
at your head ♪

Mrs. Boland, are you decent?

Mrs. Boland, we're gonna
need you to come out now.

♪

You have to open
the door, Mrs. Boland.

Or we'll open it for you.

I'm going to come out.

I need to know that
I'm not going to be hurt.

- No one's going to hurt you.
- Or my staff.

- Nate has a heart condition.
- Nate's fine.

♪

All right, Mrs. Boland.

Time's up.

♪

Hello, James.

Wow, you brought the whole team.

Oh, if any of you
are in the market,

we do give special discounts
to government employees.

I think you'll be
shut down for a while.

Take all the time you need.

- What's this?
- Shirt, pants, underwear.

- I'm good.
- No, you're not.

You're going to get up,

you're going to hose off
that self-pity and depression,

because I'm tired
of looking at it.

- Oh, is that so?
- It is.

And once it starts
swirling down the drain,

you're going to get dressed.

You're going to shave off
that nasty-ass face fungus,

and we're going to go out
and celebrate, do it up right.

What's there to celebrate, Ruby?

- You getting a proper lawyer.
- What are you talking about?

You're not going away for this.

- What are you talking about?
- I'm going to take care of it.

- How?
- I got you, boo.

Now please, wash your ass.

- Drink up, baby.
- Oh, thanks for mine.

- She's had a day.
- Haven't we all?

- God, it was really...
- Terrifying, I'm sure.

You would have had to
change my diaper.

- But it was almost...
- I bet Deansie lost it.

Fun.

It was fun.

- Here's a question.
- Yeah?

How did they even know
about the pills?

Or exactly
where to look for them.

- And just for the record...
- You don't have to go there.

- I didn't say a word.
- No one's accusing you.

But I mean,
someone said something.

Hey, have you seen Noah?

He didn't come in yesterday.

Why not?

Oh, nasty stuff's going around.

You know, last week,
I had conjunctivitis.

You probably know it
as pink eye.

It's super contagious.

I didn't want to
miss work, though.

You probably didn't notice,
but that's why

I was wearing those shades.
They're new.

I found them in the parking lot.

Don't tell Noah, though.
Because, um...

♪

♪ There must be something
else to do ♪

I didn't want to show anybody,
because it's real nasty.

You ever had it?

♪

- Hey, take a look at this.
- What do you think?

I'll be done in
about five minutes.

♪

Sometimes I think maybe
I don't want to get better.

Because at least if I use,
I know who I am.

♪

I feel like myself.

Anyone else want to share?

♪

♪ There must be something
else to do ♪

♪ There must be something
we can do ♪

♪

Lot's clean.

They knew we were coming.