Are ya ready, kids?
Kids: aye, aye, captain.
I can't hear you.
Kids: [shouting]
Aye, aye, captain.
♪ Ohh... ♪
♪ Who lives in a pineapple
Under the sea? ♪
Kids: ♪ spongebob squarepants ♪
Captain: ♪ absorbent and yellow
And porous is he ♪
Kids: ♪ spongebob squarepants ♪
Captain: ♪ if nautical nonsense
Be somethin' you wish ♪
Kids: ♪ spongebob squarepants ♪
Captain: ♪ then drop on the deck
And flop like a fish ♪
Kids: ♪ spongebob squarepants ♪
Captain: ♪ ready? ♪
All: ♪ spongebob squarepants ♪
♪ Spongebob squarepants ♪
♪ Spongebob squarepants ♪
Captain: ♪ spongebob
Squarepants ♪
[Captain laughing]
[Whistling]
[Waves crashing...
Seagulls squawking]
♪
You wanted to see me, sir?
Pull up a seat, boy.
Mr. Krabs,
There aren't any chairs.
Sit down.
Now, you've worked here
For quite some time, boy.
Oh, yes, sir, and they've been
The best years of my life, sir.
That sad fact aside, midway
Through today's lunch rush
We ran out of
The secret ingredient
To the secret formula.
[Gasping]
No!
Listen up, boy.
Any minute now, a truck driver
Is going to arrive
And I'm entrusting you to
Retrieve the secret ingredient.
And I need you to do this
Without any foul-ups.
Understand?
Could you repeat that?
It's time!
[Siren blaring...]
Now go!
And make sure to guard it
With your life!
I won't let you down.
Wait!
Yes?
If something happens
To that secret ingredient
Don't bother coming
Back to work.
[Whimpering]
You bob pants?
Uh, spongebob.
Close enough.
Now get out of here, kid.
Plenty of folks
Would love to get a hold
Of that ingredient.
Yes, sir.
And now, let's get you
Into the krabby patties,
Secret "ingredienty."
[Gasping]
Where is it?
Where is it, where is it?
No!
What's gonna happen to
The krabby patty secret recipe?
What's this?
A hole?
How did that happen?
A clean incision.
Almost as if someone,
Or something,
Did this on purpose.
That's it!
A thief must've cut
A hole and swiped
The secret ingredient.
But who?
Mr. Krabs: spongebob!
What are you doing,
Lollygagging about?
Get back to work.
[Stammering], right away, sir.
Hop to it.
There's lots of hungry
Customers out there.
[Groaning]
Mr. Krabs trusted me,
And I let him down.
Patrick: hi, spongebob.
Hi, patrick.
Maybe you can help me.
-With what?
-With this.
Here you go, buddy.
Not that kind of help.
This used to have
The krabby patty
Secret ingredient inside.
But now, it's missing.
What?
Someone stole it, patrick.
And we need to find out who.
Find out!
You and I are gonna have to do
A little detective work.
What are we eating
This time, karen?
Computer voice: something new.
Oh, you mean the secret recipe
I came up with?
Spongebob: ah-ha!
I knew it was you!
What was me?
Oh, come on, plankton.
Don't play dumb.
You know you stole the secret
Krabby patty ingredient.
Psh.
Is this a joke?
Why don't you tell me?
Is it?
Uh... No?
[Laughing]
Good one.
[Laughing]
All right, no more jokes.
Either you tell me where
The secret ingredient is
Or we'll be forced to use
Other means of making you talk.
Sorry, I really
Have nothing for you.
Then how do you explain this?
[Groaning]
Ok, you've caught me.
And so, the truth floweth forth.
Yes, it is a krabby patty.
Mm-hm.
But it's my version
Of a krabby patty.
[Stammering]
After thousands of failed
Attempts to steal the recipe
I learned all but one ingredient
Needed to make krabby patties.
The most important ingredient.
The secret ingredient.
Over the years,
I've methodically gone through
Almost every letter
In the alphabet.
Right now, I'm on the "r"s, and
I've gotten up to raw sewage.
Yuck!
Try it.
Tell me what you think.
Well, he's clean.
But if plankton didn't steal
The ingredient, who did?
Good question.
Only someone who specializes
In science could
Reverse engineer the recipe
Based on the secret ingredient.
Hm, a scientist.
There she is.
You hang back.
I'm going in for a closer look.
[Gasping]
Oh my gosh.
It is sandy.
[Grunting]
Spongebob: enjoying them
Krabby patties, lady?
Spongebob.
How long you been
Standing there, buddy?
Oh, long enough, buddy.
I was just storing food
For the impending winter.
Want one?
I'm on to you, squirrel.
[Sniffing]
You thought no one
Could figure it out,
But I pieced it together.
I know exactly how you got
All those patties.
What exactly are you
Getting at, spongebob?
What I am getting at
Is that you cloaked yourself
In an invisibility potion...
Snuck through
The security perimeter...
What was that?
Here's the secret
Krabby patty ingredient.
Spongebob: then used
A time-freezing device
To freeze time...
Used a laser beam
To cut open the case
Stole the krabby patty
Secret ingredient,
Reverse engineered it
And made your own patties,
So you wouldn't have to pay.
Or perhaps, I walked into
The krusty krab, purchased them
And received a receipt for
These legally obtained patties.
Krabby patties.
[Laughing]
That's right.
I cooked this order.
I guess this means
You didn't use a laser beam
Or invisibility.
Spongebob, next time,
Before you run around
Accusing people of things
Make sure your own house
Is in order first.
My own house, huh?
Why'd you do it, gary?
[Squeaking]
You've told us that story
Times now, gary.
Unfortunately, my partner and I
Don't want to hear stories.
We want to hear the truth.
Look, we know you stole
The secret ingredient,
And it's obvious how you did it.
First, you hitched a ride
On a security chopper.
Then, jumped into the drop zone.
And then, when I stopped
To pull up my sock
You snuck up behind me and did
What any snail could do.
You shot corrosive acid
From your tear ducts,
Which melted the case
Allowing you to steal
The secret ingredient.
[Squeaking]
Yeah, you're right, gary.
That is impossible.
I never would have stopped
To pull up my sock
During a pickup.
[Squeaking]
What's that, gary?
[Squeaking]
You did see someone
Leaving the krusty krab
With a mysterious
Black case that night?
Mr. Snail, could you please
Describe this, this marauder
To the sketch artist.
[Squeaking]
[Patrick grunting...]
[Gary squeaking...]
[Gasping]
I can't believe it!
It was squidward.
Open up in there, tentacles.
We know you're in there.
We just want to ask you a few...
He's not cooperating.
You know what to do.
And one, and...
[Screaming]
We got you!
You thought you could
Hide your crimes.
But we "hear-ed"
What you've done.
If I cared,
I'd ask what this is about.
Well, I'm glad you asked
Because this is about
You stealing the krabby patty
Secret ingredient.
And we have an eyewitness
Who saw you leaving
The scene of the crime
With a mysterious black case.
A case like this?
Yes.
Because you can't
Make krabby patties without...
[Gasping]
Tap dancing shoes?
That's right.
I was in a tap contest
On the night in question
As you can see from
My third place medallion.
I guess this means you didn't
Steal the secret ingredient.
Get out of my house!
Spongebob: mr. Krabs!
I don't know how, sir, but...
But somebody stole the
Krabby patty secret ingredient!
Spongebob!
You were in charge of guarding
That secret ingredient
With your life.
I know, mr. Krabs.
It just slipped away
From me somehow.
Well, do you have
Any leads or clues?
All I know is that
It had to be someone
Who knew about the delivery
And was at the krusty krab
During the delivery.
And this person
Would have to know
What to do with the secret
Ingredient when he got it.
That would be you, spongebob.
You stole me secret ingredient.
Me?
That's right.
And I know exactly
How you carried out
This little caper.
You obviously set up a decoy
To take the delivery.
Then when no one was looking,
You swooped in,
Stole the secret ingredient
And spirited it away
To the chum bucket
Where you sold it to plankton
To make a quick buck.
Don't talk.
You can tell it to the cops,
'Cause I'm calling 'em
Right now.
No need.
We heard it all
From this barrel.
Then arrest this thief, officer.
Mr. Krabs, isn't that
The stolen secret ingredient?
[Gasping]
What are you talking
About, spongebob?
I'm not holding
Any secret ingredient.
Am I to understand that you
Stole the item in question?
Well, I wouldn't
Call it stealing.
And you were gonna
Let someone else take the fall
For this little caper.
I can explain.
Please do.
It's simple.
$ . Is a lot to pay
For the secret ingredient
Every time I get a delivery
So i... Took it,
To avoid paying, you know.
I think judge trout
Will be very interested
To hear this little story.
What?
What'd I do?
All rise.
Eugene krabs.
Your honor.
As punishment for committing
The crime of grand theft
I sentence you to give away
Krabby patties for free
All day tomorrow.
Give away me patties for free?
Oh, no.
I couldn't bear
The sight of that.
[Sobbing]
[Mr. Krabs screaming...]
Step right up and get
Your free krabby patties.
[Mr. Krabs screaming...]
[Laughing]
♪
[Plankton grumbling]
What is going on here?
[Screaming]
Computer voice:
What's wrong now?
Same as always.
Look.
Empty again.
So what are you gonna
Do about it?
I don't know anymore!
[Sobbing]
[Computer imitating crying]
Why don't you just work
On a new recipe?
What's the point?
I haven't had
A customer in years.
Male voice: hello?
Away with you!
Can't you see that
I'm self-loathing here?
Sorry.
I just wanted a chum stick.
What?
Yes, I'd like one
Of your chum sticks.
You're kidding, right?
No, I'm serious.
I want a chum stick.
Uh, ok.
If you insist.
Oh no, please don't sue me.
Creature: mm-mm.
[Slurping]
I can't believe someone
Actually enjoys my chum.
[Laughing]
Now, this was so good, I'm gonna
Have to come back tomorrow.
Here you go.
See you in the morning.
Did you see that?
I didn't even have to
thr*aten his life.
He loved it!
How'd you pull that off?
Well, it's simple.
Finally, someone came in
Who has good taste.
And he's coming back tomorrow.
Excuse me, karen,
But I got to whip up some more.
Now, I wait.
I wait until he returns.
I wait.
I wait.
I wait.
I wait.
French narrator:
Eight hours later.
[Snoring]
[Chiming...]
Huh, nat, hello?
Huh?
What?
Ugh, it's closing time.
I should've known it was
Too good to be true.
Hey.
Well, hello, nat.
I came back like
I said yesterday.
You certainly did, didn't you?
[Chuckling]
I'd like another
Chum stick, please.
Well, it's your lucky day, nat.
I happen to have a quite
Delectable one right here.
Oh, boy.
Is it ok?
Ok?
It's perfection!
[Laughing]
Hey, how about I have another?
You bet you.
Ooh, boy.
I cannot believe how good
These things are.
Ah, well, you know.
All right, see you tomorrow.
What?
You're coming back again?
Oh, you know it.
And the day after that,
And the next week after that.
You've got a regular customer
On your hands.
Oh, my.
This is amazing.
At last, I've got my revenge.
[Laughing]
[Laughing]
♪ Rolling, rolling, rolling ♪
♪ Money keeps on rolling along ♪
[Laughing]
One more time.
Whoa!
No way, plankton.
You're not getting me formula
This time or any time.
Don't bother.
There's no need.
What're you talking about?
I'm just saying, I no longer
Need to copy you, krabs.
I've got my own
Winning recipe now.
[Laughing]
You're really funny, man.
You think you can
Compete with me?
Look, plankton.
Look at all these
Loyal customers.
Loyal to me, plankton,
Not to you.
Nat: hey, plankton!
Can I get another one
Of your delicious chum sticks?
But of course, loyal customer.
[Grunting]
I'll see you later, loser.
Much later.
[Laughing]
Oh no.
How can this be?
Boy, front and center.
Yes, sir.
Plankton's trying
To overthrow me business.
He's got a customer
That actually likes his food.
You got to get that guy
Back on our side with
A couple of krabby patties.
Oh, you can count on me, sir.
Pardon me, you smart fellow.
Down here.
[Laughing]
Why settle for plankton's lumpy
Chum when you can enjoy a
Steaming krabby patty for free?
[Groaning]
No, thanks.
Barnacles.
There he is.
Just in time for breakfast.
Oh.
I am such a clumsy oaf.
I sure hope nothing happens
To this krabby patty
While I step carefully
Over this rock here.
Oh, no.
Too late.
No, no!
Oops.
Oops.
Oops.
Oops! Oops! Oops!
Oh, come on, nat.
Just one accidental bite.
[Panting]
I see you're not
Hungry right now.
But I'm telling you,
That krabby patty is gonna make
A great snack later.
Yeah, do me a favor.
From now on, keep those
Shabby patties to yourself.
Oh, fish paste.
Plankton: nat.
Back already?
That's the fifth time today.
Not that I'm surprised.
Karen, babe, fetch nat another
Plate of that sweet chum.
Yes, your diminutiveness.
Say, nat, do you
Have any friends?
No.
♪ Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪
[Laughing]
Would you hurry up
With that chum, karen?
Spongebob: yeah, yeah, yeah.
Keep your tiny
Pants on, plankton.
Bleep bloop.
There's your chum.
Bleep blap blop.
Hey, this doesn't
Look like chum.
And that doesn't
Look like karen.
Why, don't be ridiculous,
My husband.
Bleep blap.
Of course it's me.
What have you done
With karen, you brute?
[Mumbling and beeping]
How many times do I
Have to tell you?
I don't want to eat your trash!
Plankton's chum is my favorite
Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
I love chum!
So forget it.
I don't want
To eat anything else.
So you're saying
That you love chum?
And all that you ever
Eat is chum?
Yeah, that's right.
Interesting.
[Toilet flushing]
A shortcut to the chum bucket.
Hm, that must be for me.
[Whistling...]
Welcome, valued customer.
This isn't the chum bucket.
[Laughing]
Why go to the chum bucket
When the krusty krab has added
Tasty chum to our menu?
That's ok.
I only eat
Chum bucket brand chum.
But we've developed
A special recipe for the most
Discerning chum lovers.
Besides, I've locked
All the exits until
You give it a try.
So what do you say?
[Gagging]
You like it?
[Gagging]
It's...
Yeah?
It's...
[Gagging]
Well, what do you think?
It's the second foulest thing
I've ever tasted.
[Coughing]
I'm going back
To plankton's chum.
What am I gonna do?
I can't let plankton have
So much as one single customer.
[Sobbing]: I just
Can't afford it.
[Crying]
I guess you'll have to make chum
That's as good as plankton's.
But to do that, I'd need to know
How plankton makes his chum.
Hm.
That's it, boy-o.
Where could it be?
There.
Plankton's secret formula.
It's got to be in here.
[Siren blaring...]
[Gasping]
[Grunting]
[Laughing]
What do you think, krabs, baby?
This time, I caught you trying
To steal my secret formula.
Ironic, isn't it?
Unfortunately, I have
No way of knowing.
You see, crabs are not born with
An innate inkling of irony.
Ouch.
Double irony.
Spongebob: triple
Irony, plankton.
Though you nabbed krabs
Trying to steal your formula
I'm still here to foil
Your evil plans.
So it's like a dollop of irony
On top of an ironic twist.
[Groaning]
Spongebob: I mean,
Just think about that.
You know, in a weird way,
It's like we never left the...
Good thing I sprang for
The dual spoon installation.
Karen: call it
A computer's intuition
But I sense your regular
Approaching with an unusually
Large wad of cash.
Look at all that loot.
Plankton: that's right, krabs.
And you're gonna have to
Keep looking when my customer
Comes in and pays me
For my chum.
Oh, just put me
Out of me misery.
Back for more of
My delicious chum, I see.
Not this time.
Huh?
Not ever again.
The deal's off, computer.
I can't eat another bite
Of that slop, no matter
How much you pay me.
[Stammering]
Huh?
I have eaten of those things,
And I've already had to go
To the doctor, twice.
[Groaning...]
If you need me, I'll be getting
My stomach pumped... Again.
[Groaning]
What's the deal, karen?
The deal was that I paid nat
To eat your chum so you'd quit
Your constant complaining.
All this time, I never
Had one regular customer?
Karen: duh.
I should have known.
Why would anyone
Ever eat my slop?
Ugh, there he goes again.
Cut it out, plankton.
What?
It's just obvious that I'm
A complete failure and a waste
Of a lower life form.
Oh, woe is me.
[Sobbing]
Quickly.
Now is the time
To beat a hasty retreat.
What?
And miss this?
I've never enjoyed meself more.
This irony's pretty good stuff.
[Laughing]
♪
[Children laughing]
06x08 - Patty Caper/Plankton's Regular
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.