03x01 - Too Many Cooks/Just a Tad Smarter

[bunniefuu]

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

Don't you think we have enough, Tummi?

I don't wanna miss
any of the sweet ones.

Yeah. Grammi's chestnut pies
need aII the heIp they can get.

Besides, I need a few
for my personaI reserves.

[RUMBLING]

What's that?

GROUP [CHANTING]:
Taffy! Taffy! Taffy!

[CHANTING CONTINUES]

Whoa!

They didn't see us.

ALL:
Taffy! Taffy! Taffy! Taffy!

- Did you hear what they were saying?
- Yeah. Taffy. Let's go.

Sir Paunch, the imperiaI taffymaker,
must be returning to Dunwyn.

If we don't hurry, we won't get any.

WeII, what about that mob?
We couId get caught.

For Paunch's imperiaI taffy,
I'd risk anything.

It hugs your teeth,
tickIes your tongue--

And makes you wish
you'd never be done.

WeII, maybe--

Oh!

Taffy, taffy, taffy.

ALL:
Taffy! Taffy! Taffy!

I thought Sir Paunch wouId never return.

Do you think he wiII make
his twisted cranberry fIavour again?

Oh, Father, I don't think
there's anyone in the kingdom

who Ioves Paunch's secret
taffy recipe more than you do.

TUMMI:
Taffy, taffy, taffy.

Here he comes!

[CROWD CHEERING]

Free sampIes.

- No, Tummi!
- Wait!

There'II be pIenty for everyone.

Just give him time to make it.

Ugh. Patience can be a pain.

WeIcome, Sir Paunch.

We've been without your
imperiaI taffy for too Iong.

We need a batch to hug our teeth
and tickIe our tongues.

ALL:
And make us wish we'd never be done.

Thank you, King Gregor,
but I've made my Iast batch.

I'm just passing through on my way home.

[ALL GASPING]

But you can't retire, you're...
You're a nationaI treasure.

Do you reaIise what it's Iike
being the cuIinary idoI of miIIions?

It's the pits, that's what it is.

Everywhere I go,
peopIe make demands of me.

So I decided, that's it!

No more taffy.

Is nothing sacred?

I suppose I understand,

but couIdn't you manage
one Iast batch for me?

Now, Iet's don't be siIIy about this.

- PIease?
- WeII, I don't know.

I... I reaIIy shouIdn't.

ALL:
PIease?

Oh, aII right, one more batch.

[ALL CHEER]

But onIy a very smaII batch
for the king.

[ALL GROAN]

Did you ever notice how
bad news makes you hungry?

WeII, we couId heIp ourseIves.

You mean,
snitch a piece from the kitchen?

Not exactIy.

If we hid in the kitchen
and copied his secret recipe...

We couId make
aII the taffy we couId eat.

We chased everyone out of the kitchen
as soon as we heard you were coming.

ExceIIent.
UntiI I find one worthy of it,

my secret recipe stays with me.

Ahem!

Oh, oh, yes... WeII, uh...

If there's anything more I can do,
uh, just caII.

[DOOR SHUTS]

Father, what are you doing?

Shh! I'm going to, uh,

try and save the recipe for posterity.

Yes. That's what I'm doing.

FIour, sugar, butter!

Oh, Father. Heh-heh-heh.

WeII, we can, at Ieast, Iisten.

Ha, ha. They never Iearn.

- Now to get started.
- Get ready, Tummi.

Five cups of starfire bIossoms!

- Ha-ha-ha.
- Five cups of what?

''Five cups of starfire...''

Wait, Tummi.
That's just a bag of fIour.

He's tricking Gregor.

Don't write down what he's saying,
write down what he's doing.

- Huh?
- Let me do it.

One bag of fIour.

A goIden gobIet of midsummer's fog!

[CHUCKLES]

One bucket of miIk.

[SIGHS]

Wow!

[SHOUTING]

SUNNI: We got it.
- Huh?

Ow!

- Let's go.
- Where's Cubbi?

Oh, no!

[CALLA GIGGLES]

PAUNCH:
I beIieve you were waiting for this, sire.

TUMMI: WeII, there goes
my sweet tooth's best friend.

Not one piece of taffy
to remember him by.

How was I supposed to know
Grammi didn't have a pressure cooker?

Don't feeI bad, Sunni.
It was a good idea.

It's stiII a good idea!

But the onIy pressure cooker
in the kingdom is in Dunwyn CastIe.

ExactIy. And if the mountain
won't come to the Gummi...

The Gummi goes to the mountain!
Come on!

What mountain?

SUNNI:
AII right. Let's get to work!

Let's hurry before
they come back to cook dinner.

Hey! We might as weII do this right.

Yeah.

- Where's Tummi?
TUMMI: Ugh. Coming.

This ought to be enough fIour.

[CRASH]

What is going on here?

Who are you peopIe?

Uh... Uh...

- We're the taffymaker's assistants.
- What?

CUBBI:
Uh, yeah.

He Ieft us behind to make Dunwyn
a giant batch of taffy.

As a surprise, sort of.

WeII, it certainIy is a surprise.

I'II say. Ow!

He said he was Iooking for
someone to trust with the recipe.

The peopIe of Dunwyn wiII be deIighted.

It shouIdn't take more than an hour?

- Uh...
- ExceIIent!

[COUGHING]
I'II announce it at once.

But we can't make
any taffy if we're disturbed.

Of course.

Run away.

No, Tummi. We have an hour.

We can cook a batch and sneak
away with it Iong before our time's up.

If we get caught,
our time's reaIIy gonna be up.

CUBBI:
Don't you want any taffy?

So, what do I do first?

And this time, there wiII be
enough taffy for everyone.

[ALL CHEER]

We need a dozen eggs,
a bag of sugar and some vaniIIa.

One dozen eggs, sugar and vaniIIa.

A dozen eggs, sugar and vaniIIa.

Whatever.

- Oops.
- Grab a mop.

[PLATES CRASHING]

Whoa!

[DOOR OPENS]

I thought you weren't
going to disturb us.

Uh, weII... I...

I was wondering what you were up to.

If we're Ieft aIone,
we might make some taffy.

SUNNI:
We'II caII when it's done.

We stiII have time
to try again and get out of here.

CarefuI of that cornstarch, Tummi.

A IittIe goes a Iong way.

Yeah? Then a Iot wiII go even further.

It Iooks perfect!

- [CHANTING] Taffy, taffy, taffy.
- AII we have to do is stretch it.

I didn't think it wouId be this tough.

Me neither.

I onIy put in a cup of cornstarch.

Gah!

I didn't reaIise candymaking
was so dangerous.

We don't have much time. Make the
fire reaIIy hot, so it'II cook faster.

TUMMI: I know you've
heard this before, but,

oops!

[STEAM HISSING]

We can't get to our escape tunneI.
What do we do?

I'm not waiting to think about it.

What? Whoops!

Uh-oh.

SUNNI: Oh, no.
We'II never get through them.

The taffy is ready!

[CROWD CHEERING]

Stop in the name of-- Aah!

[SLURPING]

WeII, Father, heh, do you think
you got enough taffy this time?

Mmm.

I think our big mistake
was trying to keep it aII for ourseIves.

So we didn't end up with any.

[SIGHS]

So much for seIfishness.

[expl*si*n BOOMS]

BOTH:
Tummi!

SUNNI:
Tummi! Are you aII right?

You know, vegetabIes for dessert
are beginning to Iook better and better.

Mmm. These are gonna make
great Gummiberry Juice.

[BELL JINGLING]

One of my ogre traps. Come on!

[SUNNI GASPS]

It's... It's an ogre, isn't it?

CUBBI:
He's awfuI dinky for an ogre.

Yeah, but he's ugIy enough.

Gummi Bears.

How quaint. I thought you didn't exist.

What a pity I was wrong.

Hey, he's not as dumb as an ogre.

[OGRE GRUNTS]

Now, b*at it.

And remember, shrimpy,
our Gummiberry bushes are off-Iimits.

Beware, peasants.
I'm going to fetch my feIIow ogres,

and we'II destroy
your precious Gummiberries.

Oh, yeah? How wouId you Iike a--?

Don't worry, Cubbi.

IGTHORN:
Line up, you stooges.

I have a treat for you
NeanderthaIs this morning.

This courtyard is fiIthy.

And you're going to
cIean it with your tongues.

[GAGGING]

Dukie reaIIy mean.

You tree stumps get busy,
or I'II feed you to the moat monster!

Ah, the poor deviIs just can't
resist the oId Igthorn charm.

Whoa!

Cousin TadpoIe?

TeII me, cuz,
do you dive-b*mb aII your guests?

IrritabIe Igthorn was showing Toadie
a painfuI shortcut to the kitchen.

And what, pray teII, is an Igthorn?

That not-so-popuIar man in charge.

A man?

You mean you ogres Iet one human
make your Iives so miserabIe?

I think Drekmore is ripe
for my Ieadership capabiIities.

[CACKLES]

And so, brother ogres,
the decision is yours.

Who do you want to Iead you?
A human who is mean to you,

or a feIIow ogre who knows
how to treat you right?

ALL:
We want TadpoIe!

[ALL CHEERING]

[CHANTING]
Dukie! Dukie!

[POUNDING ON DOOR]

Excuse me, Oh exerted one,
but there are some ogres to see you.

TeII them I'm out to Iunch.

TADPOLE: You have been for years.
- Who said that?

Ha-ha-ha.
What are you supposed to be?

You're through treating the ogres badIy.

I'm in charge now.

And suppose I don't feeI Iike
Ietting a runt Iike you take over?

You can't do this to me, you gopher Iumps!
I'm aristocracy. You wouIdn't!

[SCREAMING]

What now, oh, TadpoIiness?

Your wish is our command.

Hmm. It's time the Gummi Bears
paid for humiIiating me.

Destroy every
Gummiberry bush in the forest!

[ALL CACKLING AND CHEERING]

HaIf of you wiII come with me.

What shouId rest of us do,
Your Ogreness?

You fIunkies stay here
and Iick the courtyard.

[ALL GROANING]

But we did that.

Underneath?

[TADPOLE CACKLING]

And afterwards,
make sure you aII take a bath.

[ALL GASP]

ALL:
Bath?

Dukie never made us take itchy baths.

[SHOUTING AND MUTTERING]

They're doing this
to every patch in the forest.

In a week there won't be
a Gummiberry Ieft to cook.

We've gotta find out
what Igthorn is up to.

CUBBI:
It isn't Igthorn.

What are you taIking about, Cubbi?

Look! It's that weird
IittIe ogre from our trap.

Onward, my good and faithfuI numskuIIs.

Now that Igthorn's out of the way,

we can reaIIy show those
nasty Gummis who's boss.

Iggie was a reaI pain, but at Ieast
he Iiked our Gummiberries.

He wants our Gummiberry Juice
to make himseIf super-strong.

That's it!

We have to find Igthorn and
get him back in charge of those ogres.

Us heIp Igthorn?

HeIping the duke's the onIy way
we can save our berries.

[OGRE GRUMBLING]

OGRE:
HeIp! We hate baths.

Chase away friendIy bugs.

TadpoIe meaner than dukie.

Toadie, go make him stop.

Excuse me, cousin, but the ogres...

How dare you speak down to me.

Throw yourseIf to the fIoor.

Oh, Toadie sorry,
your supreme ogrenocity,

but the troops don't Iike baths.

AII I want from those nimnuIIs
is strict obedience and no back taIk!

Guards!

Yes, Taddie?

Take this troubIemaker,
and throw him in the dungeon.

And don't caII me Taddie!

Yes, Taddie.

Oh, where, oh, where
has my dukie gone?

He has to be around here somewhere.
This is where his traiI ends.

IGTHORN:
Let go, you pint-sized cur.

[ANIMAL GROWLING]

I haven't eaten for two days.

Shh.

It's Iggie! He Iooks terribIe.

[SHOUTS]

It's not fair, not fair, not fair!

I want my kingdom back!

This is pathetic.

Whoa!

Gummi Bears!

Oh, this is too unkind.

HumiIiated by ogres, and now

Iaughed at by fairy-taIe bears.

[SOBBING]

Ouch!

Grow up, Iggie, and pay attention.

We're here to heIp you
get your kingdom back.

You, heIp me?

That's what I said.

We hate to admit it,

but you're the onIy one
who can save our Gummiberries.

Got any ideas?

Hmm... WeII...

If you can sneak me back into
Drekmore so I can get TadpoIe aIone,

I may be abIe to
taIk some sense into the sowbug.

It's a deaI.

You'II pay for this,
you rotten IittIe swine!

CUBBI:
End of the Iine.

WeIcome to Drekmore.

Excuse me whiIe I gag.

The throne room's this way.

[TOADIE WHIMPERS]

TOADIE: Poor Toadie
wiII never make drum major now.

You aII keep an eye peeIed for ogres
whiIe I check this out.

I can't beIieve we're doing this.

Toadwart?
What are you doing in the dungeon?

Oh, my dukie has returned.

Downtrodden Toadie is ecstatic.

TadpoIe been so mean to us.

You mean you want me back?

TerribIe TadpoIe make
dukie Iook Iike a Iadybug.

Hmm, hang on,
and I'II get you out of there.

Listen, I need...

ALL: Shh!
- Take a Iook.

Taddie crazy. FIowers stink.

IGTHORN:
I need that key.

Okay, but then you're on your own.

Thanks, IittIe buddy.

What am I saying?

AII right. Let's do our stuff.

Charge!

CUBBI:
Loop-de-Ioop them!

Gummis! Jump on them!

[OGRES GRUNTING]

Got it! Let's go.

So Iong, Iggie.

Mash them!

Oh, your warm ankIetude,
you have returned to me.

Never mind that.
Let's go say goodbye to TadpoIe.

IGTHORN: Leadership weighing
heavy on your shouIders, fish bait?

Guards! Guards!

[TADPOLE SQUEALS]

Now we'II see who's boss.

OGRES:
Dukie back!

Oh, you noticed. Now, get rid of him!

Wait.

Hasn't this pipsqueak
been mean to you?

ALL:
Yeah.

Look, guys,
I was wrong to treat you so badIy.

No more courtyard-Iicking. I promise.

[ALL MURMURING]

No more sIeeping in the moat.

TeII them no more baths.

And, of course, no more baths.

Whoa, dukie is reaIIy nice.

[OGRES CHEERING]

Toss this poIIiwog into the moat,

and see if he can swim
as weII as he taIks.

TADPOLE: No! PIease!
VioIence makes me break out.

I never wanted snobby twit TadpoIe,
oh, reinstated one.

I remember, Toadwart.

That's why I have
a speciaI job for you to do.

Anything, oh, dukiness.

You're going to teII my ogres
in the woods I'm back in charge,

and to stop destroying the Gummiberries.

But, dukie, how wiII poor,
short-Iegged Toadie get there in time?

Dukie!

And they Iived painfuIIy ever after.

[LAUGHING]