06x01 - Sue Ellen Gets Her Goose Cooked/Best of the Nest

[bunniefuu]

# Every day you walk down the street Everybody that you meet

# Has an original point of view

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day We can learn to work and play

# And get along with each other

# You gotta listen to your heart Listen to the beat

# Listen to the rhythm of the street

# Get together and make things better By working together

# It's a simple message And it comes from the heart

# Believe in yourself For that's the place to start

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!
- What a wonderful kind of day

# We can learn to work and play And get along with each other

# What a wonderful kind of day! Hey! What a wonderful kind of day! HEY! #

- Hey, DW!
- Hey...

Sue Ellen is playing this totally amazing game we found on the Web.

It's called Virtual Goose.

There's a giant goose in the centre of the screen,

and it spins really fast.

Then it stops at one of the coloured circles.

You have to sh**t balls into the goose's mouth.

The more balls you get in, the more points you get. Blackbelt -

that's Sue Ellen's game name.

She's against Suntzu , who could be anywhere in the world,

even China.

MUTTERS IN CHINESE

Well, looks like Blackbelt has done it again.

Huh?!

- THEY CHEER
- Yes! I am unbeatable! I am queen of the virtual world!

PHONE RINGS 'Hello, you have reached Emily...'

FRENCH ACCENT: 'We cannot take your call because...

'because we are on a tri-i-ip, a big, long tri-i-ip.

'Leave your message at the sound of the beep.'

- BEEP!
- Hi, Emily, it's DW. I have a new game! Call me!

And what's a treep?

Mitts to protect my fingers, goggles to cut down glare from the screen,

my lucky pencil...

Pick a number between one and ten.

- Seven?
- Seven! That's right! You win!

You get to choose what we'll play.

Will it be Tower Of Cows or this exciting new game, Rocks In A Box?

- Nice try.
- Oh, come on! You'll love this one!

It's got REAL rocks in a REAL box!

I can't. It's the Virtual Goose championship at Muffy's.

I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but you leave me no choice.

Recognise this?

- No.
- Well, you should. It's YOUR name written on YOUR napkin.

Remember last week, when I gave you my TV time?

'You wanted to watch some dopey show about a man who made Bionic Bunny.'

..Studying children and the effects of super-heroes on their lives...

# We like soup! Soup is great! You eat it from a bowl... #

Please, just let me finish this show!

I'll do whatever you want for an hour later.

- You're playing with your glasses - that means you're fibbing!
- I'm not!

I have to be sure you're not lying. Sign this napkin.

It's "later" now, and it's time to pay up! Pay up!

What if I promise to play with you for two whole hours next weekend?

Make it three, and you've got a deal!

THEY CHEER ARTHUR ON

- Boy, this Fourhand is really good.
- He sure is!

My fingers hurt from trying to beat him.

Maybe he's called Fourhand because he's a four-handed mutant sheep,

created by an evil scientist!

BLEATS

Excellent!

ONE thing's for sure - Fourhand is going to clobber Sue Ellen.

We'll see about that! Out of my way!

It's not possible!

Cheer up, Sue Ellen. Fourhand is a genetically enhanced sheep.

- You're just a kid.
- He was just lucky, that's all.

He's been lucky for the last eight games.

I think the championship is over.

Just one more game.

Must practise...

Must practise...

- It's late! Aren't you finished with your homework yet?
- Er, almost!

Yeah, I'm finished.

Goodnight, Sue Ellen.

Goodnight, Mom.

Must practise... Must practise.

Must practise...

Shall I repeat the question?

- SHE SNORES
- Red! The answer is red!

No, Sue Ellen, times is NOT red,

it's .

But if I'd asked what colour your cheeks are turning, "red" is correct!

Let's try to stay awake.

Francine, check out my new form of exercise - it's called Ear-obics!

One and two, one and two...

HONK! HONK! HONK!

I'm sorry, Francine, I'm just SO tired.

I was up all night, practising Goose.

It's all because of that Fourhand !

If I had him right here, I'd...

Maybe you should take a break.

Virtual Goose is affecting your brain!

You're right.

OK, that's it!

I'm not going to touch a computer game for one whole week!

- Thanks, Francine!
- Don't mention it.

'Hello, you have reached Emily.

'We are still on our tri-i-ip...

'And a "treep" is a trip with a French accent!'

Oh.

Not so fast!

- I want my four hours NOW!
- Four?! I only owe you THREE hours!

You're forgetting the first hour you still owe me.

I have it all here on napkins! See?

- It's the Virtual Goose championship today.
- That was LAST weekend.

That was just the final play-offs. This is the REAL championship!

Sorry, Arthur, a contract is a contract.

Cows or Rocks?

Muffy's going to k*ll me for this!

Does she have an ice-cream machine?

If she does, I'll have vanilla! Does she have a petting zoo?

I'll pet the whale first, then I'll have vanilla with vanilla sprinkles.

If I pet the whale first, my hands might smell fishy,

so FIRST, I'll have the vanilla...

Whales are mammals, right? I wonder if my hands'll smell mammal-y.

Press green! Now red! I said red, not yellow!

No back-seat Goosing! I can't concentrate!

Six days with no Goose, and now it's the championship!

- You don't even seem tempted.
- It was hard at first, but now I'm OK.

You have to take it one day at a time.

Oh...

Take that, you mutant!

I am in control... I am in control...

I'm here! Is it my turn yet?

Excuse me, where's the petting zoo?

Hello! I'm talking here! Is anyone home?!

They can't hear you. They'll be like that for a couple of hours.

- What are we supposed to do?
- Go exploring!

WHEE-EEE-EEE!

Top floor, please.

That's not good.

Vanilla ice cream with vanilla sauce! Heavy on the sauce.

- Wow!
- It must be Muffy's OLD game room!

I guess this'll have to do. ..Nice whale!

Confuse The Goose. I bet Virtual Goose is based on this dumb game.

I beg your pardon?! This is the REAL thing!

It takes guts and fast little hands, it's not just pushing buttons.

- Are you good?
- Good?! I've had that goose so confused it was quacking!

I'll show you a few tricks...

games in a row. That must be a new world record in losing!

And we were ALL playing! It's our six hands against his four!

- EIGHT hands, Buster!
- He's even better than I thought!

- Step aside! Let me at the computer!
- But what about your promise?

That was before, but now I know how to beat Fourhand .

Now I know the way of the goose!

Remember, you don't play with THESE, play with THIS!

- I can't!
- WHAT?!

A promise is a promise, even if it's just to myself.

Way to go! But mutant sheep are gonna take over the world!

I guess no-one will beat Fourhand now.

Well, there might be someone...

You want a little white ice cream, Mr White Whale?

You can't be serious!

Eat those dots, Goose!

We're saved! Long live two-handed mammals!

Goodbye, Fourhand !

Who is this Disaster Warning ?

I don't know, but she's good... real good.

A-a-ah! This is the life.

A warm fire, good friends,

and three pounds of Beef Jerky...

- RUSTLING
- What was that?!
- M-M-Maybe it was a lion!

There are no lions in North America. RUSTLING

Except for, of course, mountain lions!

- Stay calm! - I wanna quit the game!

This isn't a game! This is real!

Who ordered the dolce di pescares? Oh, I did!

- What's that?
- French vanilla and fresh fish!

Mmm! You can really taste the cod!

- Thanks.
- Hi, guys! Shouldn't you be playing Virtual Goose?

I thought the final match of the play-offs was today.

It is, but since DW started playing, Goose has got boring.

- She always wins.
- Besides, who wants to play computer games anyway?

Guess what! I just downloaded Virtual Goose, version . ! It's SO cool!

- . , wow!
- It must be so good, they skipped versions through !

- I wanna play!
- Me too!
- Let's go!

Sorry, Sue Ellen, we're closed!

Tut! Addicts!

'..The Virtual Goose laid six eggs.

They were Sporty Goose, Stylish Goose, Strong Goose,

Silly Goose,

Smart Goose...

..and finally, Just Plain Goose.

Because of hard times,

the Virtual Goose had to leave her six gifted children

and pursue a career in online gaming.

She vowed to return with fame and fortune

but before she could, an evil wind blew the nest out of the tree.

These geese must fend for themselves, alone in the deep, dark woods.

Only ONE will survive.

Choose a goose, pass the trials,

and see if YOU can be...

ALL CHOOSE A GOOSE

Aw, I guess I have to be Just Plain Goose.

Level one.

Hmm... A!

What?!

Haven't you finished your research yet? I've got a game to play!

See? My goose should've been able to fly!

Why aren't you still in the game? Because it's a dumb game!

- I mean, a shark in a RIVER?
- Don't listen to him, Binky.

He couldn't last a DAY in the wild!

- I could, too.
- Well, I guess we'll never know...

Oh, it's the third trial!

Eat the mushrooms!

'Congratulations. You have passed on to level four.'

- But that's ridiculous! They could've been poisonous!
- Spoilsport!

A real weekend camping in the real woods. Are you up to the challenge?

Don't know. Will there be REAL food?

- - My dad makes amazing s'mores. - Where do I sign?
- Camping? Ugh!

No showers, no beds, no TV? No, thanks!

Er, I mean, I'd LOVE to go, but I can't...

- because of my fragile health.
- FEEBLE COUGH

You four have a good time.

I get it! Muffy wants to get rid of us

so she can be the Best of the Nest.

Imagine how she'll be if she wins...

First there were six, then there was one. Muffy Crosswire - top bird!

Pass the salt, please.

Sporty Goose wants the salt. Can she have it?

Negativo! Salt is only for the best.

- Head honcho of the honkers, commander of the gander...
- ARGH!

- Sorry.
- Yeah, we'd LOVE to go,

but it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the class.

Sorry, I've got a karate tournament.

YA-AH!

Make...that a...trip to the doctor's!

Camping, huh?

Sorry, Brain, it says no travelling on days with the letter Y in them.

Friday already, and still no takers.

- This camping trip's a complete dud. - A camping trip?!

I SO enjoyed camping when I was a boy.

In the woods, with the awesome beauty of nature... That's acer rubrum.

That's ulmus americana.

Oh, what's that?!

Moth pupae!

I'd LOVE to go! Great...

BELL RINGS

Have a good weekend, class! Work on those diaramas.

Oh, Alan, I have some wonderful books that we can take with us.

"A History Of Elwood City's Environs From The Pleistocene To The Present"

and "Trail Maps Of The West".

Very handy if we get lost. And this little morsel...

" , Low-fat Recipes For Bark".

Um...I think we could print that information off the Internet.

It'd be easier to carry. The...Internet?

Well, you see... I've never actually...

SKIIED the webbing... of the information freeway.

It's as easy as tying your shoes.

Ooh!

Welcome.OK, we're finally on the Internet. For trail maps,

we can go to... Oh, chat rooms!

Oh, the No-strings-attached Bunracu Puppetry Discussion Group!

It's late. Maybe we should look for stuff on camping.

Philistine! The shamisen is NOT a four-stringed Japanese lute.

That's the biwa. This is amazing, Alan.

Why, I could surf the web all weekend!

Alan, it's not too late. WE can still go on the trip.

I wanted to go with my friends, but everyone's busy with their computers.

Oh, that reminds me - I've got to update the ice-cream shop's website.

DING-DONG! Look what I bought online!

Before we set out on our adventure, I have to make a few brief stops.

Arthur, you're coming! I thought you were playing Best Of The Nest!

On level ten, my goose was destroyed by a cruel force of nature.

- Hmm... It must be A!
- PHONE RINGS

- COMPUTER BLEEPS AND BURBLES
- NO!

That little goose never had a chance against DW.

My mom made me stop playing.

She said staring at the computer for so long was bad for my eyes.

Hey, Prunella, when did YOU learn to drive?

Miss Turner said I was hogging the library's computer.

Brain, will it be cold this summer? Probably not. Why do you ask?

Dad'll buy me a computer when it snows in July.

OK, that's the last of us. Off to the mountains!

BRAIN: What about Francine and Muffy?

Must...survive...

- PHONE RINGS
- Hello.
- You know I'm gonna win.

My...fingers...are...faster.

Well...my COMPUTER is faster.

- Give up!
- Never!

Congratulations!

You have passed on to level !

Ohh...

This is the life - a warm fire, good friends,

and three pounds of beef jerky!

- RUSTLING
- What was that?
- M-Maybe a lion!

There are no lions in North America!

Except for, of course, MOUNTAIN lions!

- Stay calm! - Where's the escape button?!

Binky, it isn't a game. This is REAL.

Mr...Ratburn...

I presume. U-u-ugh!

We made it, Daddy, we made it, and the reception is fantastic!

MR RATBURN: Elm bark with lichen tapenade?

Who wound up being Best Of The Nest?

- Neither of us.
- Who'd know that you scare a bear with the hokey-pokey?

The hokey-pokey? That's just stupid! FEROCIOUS GROWLS ]

# You put your left foot in You put your left foot out

# You put your left foot in And you shake it all about

# You do the hokey-pokey And you turn yourself around... #