01x29 - Trapped

[bunniefuu]

Ralph, if you sink this one,
you tie the house record,

17 balls in a row.

Well, as the bride
said to the groom

when they took the burnt steak
out of the oven,

it's as good as done.

Well, here it goes, for the run.

Seventeen.

You did it, Kramden.

You tied the house
record, 17 in a row.

And now I'm going
to hit in the 18th ball

and break the house record.

You know something?

There's something I can't
figure out about your game.

Any time you come in here
on a Saturday afternoon,

you sh**t like a champ.

But when you play at night,

you're a sucker for every guy
that comes into the place.

What have you got on
Saturday afternoon

that you haven't
got at night?

It isn't what I haven't got
on Saturday afternoon,

it's what I have got: Norton.

That guy'll drive you nuts.

Now, don't rush it,
Ralph.
Don't worry, pal.

This is the one
that counts.

It's going to go in
like it had eyes.

Say there, Ralphie boy.

I have just knocked in
17 balls, Norton,

to tie the house record.

I am now going
to knock the 18th ball in

to break the house record,

and I don't want to hear
one sound out of you.

You won't even
know I'm here.

I'll be right with you.

I'll show you
how to play the game.

Just let him come out.

Just let him out, Harry!

Take it easy,
Kramden.

Take it easy.

That guy's enough
to drive you nuts.

He hasn't got
any consideration for anybody.

I'm telling you,
if he wasn't my best friend,

I'd have nothing
to do with him.

Look...

Look, Ralph, I've been
watching pool players

for a long time.

You're a much better
player than he is.

You know something?

Norton doesn't b*at you,
you b*at yourself.

Now, look, pay no
attention to him,

and I guarantee
you can b*at him.

You know,
you're right, Harry.

I don't care what he does,
he's not going to get me upset.

I'll have 50 balls
before he can chalk up.

Now you're talking.

I'll rack 'em up
for you.
Go ahead and rack 'em up.

I'm ready for him.

Hey there.
( chuckles )

Well, it's just 5:00.

Got time to show you how
to play a game or two.

All right, get your cue.

Sorry I can't offer
you one of these,

but a fellow I work
with down the sewer
there, Hagerty,

had a blessed event.

Oh. Had a baby?

No, his mother-in-law
moved back to Schenectady.

Well, what do you do
with the break there?

Toss 'em up in there?

Well, how much
you want to play for?

Well, uh, let's raise
the ante up there.

Let's make it a
nickel a ball there

and a cr*ck over
the knuckles

for every scratch.

If you don't mind,
we'll stick to the same odds

we always play.
That's a penny a ball.

Okay.

Heads or tails?

Heads.

Tails. I... break.

Wait a minute!

Don't you think
I should see that coin?

Yeah, sure.

Look at it.

Go ahead and break.

Wait a minute.

What's the idea
of all that powder?
Huh?

I said, what's the idea
of all the powder?

Well, it makes
the skin smooth,

the cue don't stick to
your skin there, you know.

Yeah, I learned it
from the pros.

It flies easier there.

All right!

Come on!

Just don't shout when
I'm about to break...

Go ahead and sh**t!

Hey!

That's the way
I played it.

Not a bad break.

Well, like I say,
with plenty of talcum powder,

the cue don't stick
to your skin there.

You and your talcum powder!

Wait a minute.

What do you think
you're doing?

You had your sh*t.
Now it's my turn.

Move away from that table
before you're not able to move.

Boy, what a grouch.

Three ball. Look out.

Will you stop blowing
smoke in my face?

Put the cigar down.

( screams ):
Ow!

What's the matter
with you?!

Look what you did
to my hand!

Look what you did
to my cigar!

That settles it.

I'm quitting,
I'm going home

and I never want
to see you again.

You are the only man

that can turn my stomach
upside down.

Go ahead. There ain't
a man in New York City

that's strong enough to turn
your stomach upside down!

( alarm bell ringing )

( g*nshots, whistle blowing )

( engine accelerating )

What was that?!
I heard a sh*t!

Hey, what's
it all about?
I don't know.

It sounded like
a burglar alarm or something.

A burglar alarm?
Yeah.

I'll be back
in a minute.

Watch the place,
will you, Norton?

Hey, Ralph,
were you out there when...?

What happened to you?
( stammering )

What do you mean,
"ba-ba"?

What happened?

Right through the hat.

Right through the hat!
Hey, Ralph.

I'm standing on the corner,

I'm waiting for a
red light to change.
Yeah.

All of a sudden, two guys
come running out of the bank,

they see me and they
take a sh*t at me.

My hat flies off.

Right through the hat, Norton.

Ralphie boy,
that could have k*lled you!

Did you see the guys?

I got a little glimpse of them.

Yeah, I know what they
look like all right.

Look, why don't you tell
the cops?

You're right. I gotta
tell the cops right away.

Wait a minute.
What?

I can't tell the cops.
Why not?

If I tell the cops,

my picture will
appear in the paper,

with my address
and everything.

Oh, hey, hey,
that's right.
That's right.

They're K*llers, Norton.

They'll do me in.

Don't tell the cops nothing,

because if the cops
didn't know you were there,

then the K*llers
don't know you were there

and nobody saw you
and nothing happens.

I'm not saying a word.

I didn't see anybody.
That's good.

I know they're going
to get me, Norton.

I'm a-scared.
I'm a-scared!

Just calm down. Relax.

Look, it's getting dark out.

It's 5:00, 5:30, you know,
nobody's seen you.

All they seen
is the dark outline, you know?

Maybe there's
a thousand people there

built like you
in New York City.

You really think so?

Maybe a hundred.

A couple, anyway.

Boy, oh, boy,
what excitement!

What?
The guys knocked off
the watchman

and made a clean getaway.

The cops can't find
an eyewitness.
No kidding?

Hey, Ralph, weren't you outside
when it happened?

( stammering )

You know, if you saw anything,
you better tell the police.

I-I didn't
see anything.

What did I see?
No, you haven't seen
a thing.

Look, uh, just relax.

Uh, you come home
with me, you know,

you haven't seen nothing,
and, uh, Trixie

is spending the night
with her sister, there,

you come home with me,
we have some supper,

we play a couple
of games of pinochle

and then we look
at a very good movie

on the late, late show.

Maybe you're right, Norton.

Maybe that'll calm me down.

What's playing tonight
on the late, late show?

Humphrey Bogart
in Dead Men Tell No Tales.

( knocking on door )

Coming!

Hiya, Tommy.

Hello, Mrs. Kramden.

My mother sent me down here
to find out

if there was any water
running in your sink.

Ours is busted.

Well, I'll see.

( hissing, loud popping )

( groans )

Sounds like a cannon.

Just like ours.

Tommy, would you
do me a favor?

See if you can turn
that valve under there.

That might do something.

Sure.

Attaboy.

Try it now, Mrs. Kramden.

( hissing, loud popping )

( groans )

Same old story--
Plenty of pressure,
but no water.

I guess you'd better
tell your mother

that it's the same thing
all over the house.

What a break!

That means I won't have
to take a bath tonight.

( chuckles )

Oh, hiya, Tommy.

Hi, Alice.
Hi.

Boy, I sure am glad
you stopped in, Trix.
Huh?

Our sink's on
the blink again.

Oh, I know.
I left a note for Ed

and I put it
where he'd be sure to find it.

In the icebox?
Yeah.

I just hope he's able
to fix it, though.

Boy, me, too.
I'm telling you,

this house is just
falling apart.

Why not?

It's so old, I'll bet
George Washington slept here.

He couldn't have.

This place was condemned

before George Washington
got here.

I've got to be going, Alice.

Hey, Alice,
what's this doing here?

Oh... that's
Tommy Manicotti's
water p*stol.

He just left it here.
Oh.

I guess
he'll pick it up later.
Yeah.

Listen, Alice, I'll be
down to see you tomorrow

just as soon
as I get back.
All right, Trix.

Say hello to your sister
for me.
I sure will.

Bye, honey.
Bye-bye.

( tapping lightly )

I just want to let you know
in case you see me out here,

I'm putting up a television
aerial for Mrs. Halperin.

Oh, thanks.

You're working kind
of late, aren't you?

You know how
some people are.

She's got to have
the set tonight.

Yeah, I know.

Oh, Ralph!

( screams )

What's the matter
with you, Ralph?

Nothing, you just
surprised me, that's all.

Oh. Well,
I just want to tell you

I'll have your supper
ready for you in a minute,

but I'm just finishing
a hem

on a dress in here.
I'll be right out.

How are you?

( yells )

I'm sorry I scared
you, mister.

I'm just putting up
a television aerial.

( hissing, loud popping )

( cries out in pain )

( groaning )

They got me, Alice!

They got me!
They got me, Alice!

Ralph,
what's the matter?

They got me, Alice!

Ralph, Ralph,
nobody got you.

It's the sink, Ralph.

I forgot
to tell you about it.

Sink?
Yeah.
The noise that it makes.

I hope it didn't scare you.

What are you
talking about?

Why would I get scared?

We're going to really
have to do something
about this, Ralph.

Now will you help me
slice the bread, please?

I've got to set the table.

Oh, the big Kn*fe is
in the bureau drawer.

Hey.

What is this thing
doing in there?

Oh, that's little
Tommy's water p*stol.

He was up here a while
ago and left it here.

You want to take it down
to him after supper for me?

All right.

All right, Ralph.

Tell me.

Tell you what?

Ever since you came
home tonight

I knew you were upset
about something.

Now look how your
hand is shaking.

Who's shaking?

Well, all right,
then, cut the bread.

I'll cut it.

There's no sense
in me lying to you, Alice.

I've got to tell you.

Now, look, when I tell you,
I don't want you to get nervous,

'cause there's nothing
to get nervous about.

There's a couple of guys
out after me,

they're going to k*ll me.
What?!

I was coming out
of the poolroom,

I was on my way home,
and I stopped for a red light.

And the two guys
come running out of the bank

and they saw me
and I saw them

and they took a sh*t at me
and the hat flew off

and I got a hole in my hat.

Oh, Ralph, this
is terrible!

Why didn't you
tell me before?
Well...

What did the police say?

I didn't tell the police.

You didn't tell them?

I can't tell the police,
Alice.

If I tell the police,
my picture will be in the paper

with my address
and everything else.

Those guys will know
right where we are.

They'll come up here
and get me.

They're K*llers, Alice.
It's better off this way.

Nobody knows that I saw them
and it's all right.

What do you mean,
"better this way"?

Why, you're shaking
so you can't even cut
a slice of bread, Ralph.

And you jump at
the slightest noise.

I'll be all right tomorrow.

I'll calm down
and everything will be fine.

Ralph, you've got
to go to the police

or it'll just get worse.
Don't you understand?

You won't be able to
walk down a dark street,

you'll be afraid
of every shadow.

And if a car backfires,

you'll think somebody
took a sh*t at you.

Why, it'll get so
you get on the bus,

you'll think every
passenger that's on there

is going to try
and k*ll you.

You can't live the rest of
your life in fear, Ralph.

You're right.

I'll go down
to the police now.

I knew you would, Ralph,
and I'll go with you.

Oh, wait a minute.
You're not going
anywhere with me.

I don't want you
to get mixed up in this.

Oh, but Ralph.
This is my responsibility.

Don't "But Ralphie" me now.

Sweetheart, I don't want
anything in the world

to happen to you.
I'm in love with you.

Now let me
take this thing alone.

Ralph, anything that's
going to happen to you

is going to
happen to me, too.

Now I'm going to go
and get my coat.

Now, look...

MAN:
That's him.

That's the guy.

( pounding on door )
ALICE:
Ralph!

Ralph, open this door!

Stay in there, Alice!

Don't come out.
Don't get in this.

Come on, Danny,
let's grab him and blow, huh.

Are you crazy?
A minute after we left,

the dame would
spread the alarm.

Come on, get
out of the way.

Oh, wait a minute, now, pal.
Now, wait a second.

She doesn't know anything!
You heard me.

Get out of the way!

She doesn't know anything
about this, pal.

Okay, lady, out.

Look...
Oh, Ralph!

Look, look, I won't
tell anybody, honest.

Shut up!
I swear I won't tell.

Shut up!

Bibbo, you go and see
if it's clear.

Find out
if everything's all set.

( distant sirens wailing )

Now, I don't want a word
out of either of you two.

Hey, you hear something?

( sirens continue )
( engine accelerating )

DANNY:
Is that Marty
pulling away?

He's pulling away with the car.

Hey, there's something wrong.

Hey, Danny, it's the cops!

Cops?
Yeah, a patrol car
just pulled up.

Did you talk
to the cops?

( stammering )

The truth!
( stammers )

Hey, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
I wouldn't say anything.

One of those cops
is coming up this way now.

Hey, look, we've got
to blow this joint.

The roof. We can b*at it
across the roof, huh?

Now, wait a minute,
wait a minute, Monty.

Just get a hold
of yourself.

They found out
about this guy
down at the poolroom.

Those cops
don't know nothing.

They're coming here
for information.

And you ain't giving it
to 'em, mister.

If they come in here,
you know nothing.

You don't say
one single word

or else... she gets it.

Okay, Bibbo,
take her inside.

( stammering )
Now, just remember
what I said.

( knocking on door )
One word!

Kramden?
I don't know anything.

Police Department,
Mr. Kramden.

I don't know nothing.

Now, look, you're
in a bad spot, you know that?

I'm going to tell you
just what I told your pal

down at the poolroom.

Your safety and your life
is in danger

if you don't give us
a description.

I didn't see anything.

These fellas are K*llers.

They sh*t
the night watchman.

I don't know anything.

You don't
know anything, huh?

All right,
I'm going to give you a break.

I'm leaving
a policeman downstairs

to look after you
overnight.

But if you don't tell us
what you know by morning,

you're on your own.

If you're not a witness,

you're not entitled
to police protection.

And thanks... for nothing!

Welcome.

I didn't tell
him anything.

Alice?

He's gone.

Sure, sure, he's gone,
but what about the other copper

that's waiting downstairs?
What about him, huh?

Nothing.
He'll be gone in the morning.

But we can't stay here
all night!

Why not?
We got the police protecting us.

Please, please, go away.
We won't say anything.

Look, I just
proved to you

I wasn't going
to say anything.
Shut up!

Look, Danny, Danny,
what about Marty in the car?

Don't worry about Marty.

He was smart enough to duck
when the cops showed.

He'll come back
when they're gone.

Don't you...?
I-I don't like this.

I don't like the idea
of staying here all night.

I didn't ask you
what you liked.

Please, please,
will you go away?

All right,
stick 'em up!

Get 'em up!

( knocking on door )

Who is it?

TOMMY:
It's me, Tommy.

Have you got my water p*stol
in there?

Here you are, Tommy.

TOMMY:
Thanks, Mr. Kramden.

You're very welcome.

Hey, look, Danny,

let me give him
a working-over, huh?
No, no!

Another stupid move
like that, Kramden,

you'll get the worst b*ating
anybody ever got in their life.

Just let me give him
a sample, huh, Danny?

A little sample, huh?
Ralph, please.

Tell them that you'll
do anything they say.

Now, look,
you two are sitting down.

You're not making a sound
or a move from here in.

If you try anything,
I ain't stopping Bibbo.

Now sit!

( knocking on door )

Answer that.

Who is it?

ED:
Uh, it's me, Ralph, Norton.

What you got
the door locked for?

It's my friend
from upstairs.

You get rid of him
the same way you did the copper.

Coming, Norton.

Hey there, Ralphie boy.

You got the door locked,
you're pale, you're shaking.

Those bums are
a thousand miles away from here.

Uh, why don't you
go home now?

What do you mean,
"Why don't I go home"?

Those guys ain't
got any courage.

They're not going
to stick around here.

They'll run like rats.

Go head out now.
Huh?

I say, get out.

What's the matter, Ralph,
you got a twitch?

Just get out.

You act like a guy
that's got a g*n in his back.

Will you get out of here!

Look, I come down here
in good faith to fix the pipes

and that's just
what I'm going to do.

We don't want any
pipes fixed now.

You can come on
down tomorrow

and fix all the pipes.

All?
All the pipes.

The pipes out here
and the two pipes

that need fixing
inside the bedroom.

I'll take a look-see.

You can't go
in there now.

Alice is in there.

She's getting dressed.

You can come down and fix
those two pipes tomorrow.

Oh...
( chuckles )

Well, okay, like you say,
if there's a better time,

I'll come down
and fix the pipes tomorrow.

Bye. So long, Norton.

Bye, Ralph.

Okay, pal.
Okay.

Hey, uh, I got
rid of him.

Okay, now lock the door.

Yes, sir.

Hey.
Oh.

I was just thinking...

there's only one pipe
there that needs fixing.

( laughing )

You're making
a big mistake, you know.

What are you going
to do, untie us

every time somebody
knocks at the door?

Now, listen, redhead,
don't strain your brain.

It's after 11:00.
Visiting hours are over.
Ow!

Hey, you, take it easy.

That's my wife.

What are you going
to do about it, fatso, huh?

Now, look, pudgy,
put your hands behind your back.

I'm not going
to do it.

I said, put your hands
behind your back!

I don't care what you said,
I'm not going to do it.

Look, pal...
You look.
And you look.

Go ahead
and wave that g*n.

I must have been
a dope.

You guys are in
just as much trouble as we are.

We can't leave here
and neither can you.

Those cops are downstairs,
you know.

And if you sh**t that g*n off,
you know what'll happen?

Every cop
in the neighborhood

will be up here
in five seconds.

So just go ahead.

And look, I don't know when
I'm going to run into you,

but someday
I'm going to run into you

when you haven't got
this guy with the g*n.

And brother,
are you going to get yours.

Look, by the time
we get finished with you,

you won't be
in no condition to get ours.

Okay, Bibbo,
take him inside
and work him over.

Come on.
No, no, please!
He didn't mean it!

He didn't mean it!
Just tie him up!

Don't take him in there!

You ain't married
to a very smart guy, lady.

( thudding )
He sure asked for it.

( crying ):
Stop it! Stop it!

They're k*lling him!

Stop it!
If you want to be next,
I can arrange it.

Yeah?
Yeah.

All right, you!
Get 'em up!

Get 'em up.
Go over there
and untie them.

Ralph.

I-I... I thought
it was you

that was getting k*lled.

Just get over there.

Wait a minute, here.
Just a minute.

Look out.

Nobody's k*lling me.

Watch out for
the other one.

I got him covered.
Get up.

That'll be the day
when a bum like you

can take care of me.

I suppose this is the first time

you ever run into a bus driver,
isn't it?

All right.

I'm going to take
you guys downstairs.

No, no, no, no, Ralph,
you done enough already.

Let me take them down there,
will ya?

All right,
be my guest.

All right, you crummy thugs.

Get on out of here.

All right, get a moving there...

( sighs )

Ralph, I never thought
we'd get out of this alive.

( snaps fingers )
Sweetheart, how
did you manage it?

A mere bag of shells.

You see, Alice, there's a lot
you don't know about me.

My fighting,
for instance.

I go pretty good
when I get going.

See, the reason you don't know
about it is because I'm modest.

I never tell you anything
about my prowess, you know.

I just happen
to be a modest guy.

Hey...
I got to get downstairs.

Why? Where
are you going?

I got to get down there

before Norton takes credit
for this whole thing.