05x05 - Child's Play

[bunniefuu]

Yami-yugi:
previously on "yu-gi-oh"...

[Screaming]

Nooooooo!

I lost.

Roland: and the winner
is leon wilson!!

A'right, gilford...
att*ck!

Slice and dice
his ancient dragon!

I'm wide open!

Dat's riiiii-ight!

Any last requests!?

Aah!

[Groaning]

Nice duel, stranger.

I just wish I knew
who you were.

Actually you already do.
Heh heh!

Peek-a-boo.

No way!

Way!

Pretty good
disguise, huh?

That could be
my new look!

♪ Your move, your move,
your move, your move ♪

♪ Your move,
your move! ♪

♪ Yu-gi-oh!

♪ Your move

♪ Yu-gi-oh!

It's time to d-d-d-duel!

♪ Yu-gi-oh!

Tristan: nice win, joey.

You made it
to round two.

And I owe duke a steak.

Oh, well.

Roland: attention!
The next two bouts
will now begin!

Hurry up, guys!

Or we're gonna miss
the next duel!

All: huh?

Roland: in block b,
we have regional champ

And self-proclaimed
child-genius, rebecca hawkins!

Check it out!

She'll face
the model turned actress

Turned kung-fu master
turned duelist...vivian wong!

Not her!
I'm telling you

That diva is nothing
but bad news!

Grandpa: ha ha!
Yes! It's another duel!

I can't get enough!

Let's go!

I guess someone's
excited ta be here.

I know you like dueling,
but if you don't calm down

You're gonna
hurt yourself.

It's been so long
since I've been
near the action!

I just gotta--ohh!

Grandpa!!

Tristan: told ya.

Grandpa!
Are you okay!?

Ahhh...it appears he's
thrown his back out!

Aw, poor guy.

I'll radio
for a doctor!

Just relax, grandpa.

Yugi...don't worry
about me.

You just go with your
friends and enjoy

The rest of the tournament.

But I can't leave
you like this.

Go on. I shall look after
your grandfather.

You go and root
for rebecca.

But are you sure,
professor?

My granddaughter
would never admit it,

But she could really use
some support out there.

Fortune salim: ohh!
That's the last time

I eat bean burritos
before a duel.

He's our ticket in!

Are you sure this
is gonna work?

Stop being so
negative, rex!

Name the last time
one of my ideas
didn't work!

Every time!

Just once I'd like
to get my revenge...

Without looking like
a doofis!

Ohh. Stadium food.

Fortune salim: what are
you...hey...that's mine!

Rex: so much for not
looking like a fool.

Weevil: shut up
and keep your
balance!

Oh, ohh, whoa!

I still hafta go
to the bathroom!

Vivian: this duel's
gonna be really short
and really lame...

Kinda like you.

I was hoping
for a real opponent.

Not someone who needs
mommy's permission to duel.

Someone strong
like yugi!

He's so commanding yet
sweet n' gentile

All at the same time!

Look, viv...

You won't be
stepping within
fifty feet

Of my yugi,
so give it up.

Oh, is that so?

Trust me...when I ace
this tournament

And become a celebrity,
yugi'll forget
all about you.

I bet he already has.

Err.

Aw, you gonna tell
teacher I'm picking on you?

Hyah! Hyah!

Alright...
Let's go, half pint!

Bring it on!

Both: time to duel!

I'll go first!

You'll need
a head start!

Ha!

I summon kung fu
nyan nyan in att*ck mode!

Top that, shrimp!

No problem.
Look out!

Time to activate
a little magic card!

Graceful charity.

Now I get to draw
three new cards,

As long as I discard
two from my hand.

Next I think
I'll summon
my fire princess

In att*ck mode!

Then I'll place
two cards facedown.

That'll do for now.

Check it out, guys!

I found her!

Yo! Bec!
How's it goin!?

Yugi--aah!

Hi, yugi-poo!

I knew you'd be here
to cheer me on,

My little dumpling!

Whaaa?

Not quite!
Yugi's here for me!

Don't worry, pumpkin!

As soon as I trounce
this little twerp,

It's all
about you and me!

Ohh.

Oh, man!
You're my hero, yuge!

So what's
your secret?

Uh, natural charm?

This is why I need
more female friends!

Show no mercy, rebecca!

That glamazon
has gotta go!

So...you ready
to dance!?

Ah, I don't dance
with preschoolers.

Now where was i?!

Oh, yeah!
I remember!

I was about to kick
your puny butt

Back to the playpen
with my kung fu nyan!

Who, by the way, gets
extra points

Thanks to her
special ability!

But first I summon
my master kyonshee
in att*ck mode!

And now...it's time
to extinguish
your fire princess!

In your dreams, viv!

I reveal
my trap card!

It's a little
something I like to
call gravity bind!

As long as it's
on the field,

You can't att*ck me
with any monster

That has more
than three stars!

Hy--ohh!

No!

[Thinking]
that little
brat's gonna pay!

No one makes a fool
outta me!

This duel's
far from done!

Well, so far
so good.

I guess, but rebecca's
trap card

Affects
her own monsters too.

If they have
more than three stars,

She can't use them.

Tea:
that's not good!

I'm sure that this is
all part of her plan.

She'll be just fine.

Get a load 'a this!

First...i'm
activating

Marie the fallen
one's

Special ability from
the card graveyard!

Now I automatically
receive
extra life points

For every turn
that marie remains
in the graveyard!

And to finish
things off,

I'll activate
the special ability
of my fire princess!

So every time
my life points
increase,

Yours decrease
by !

[Gasps]

I knew it.

Awesome! Rebecca's
three-card combo

Allows her to
automatically lower

Vivian's life
points every turn!

I'll place one card
facedown...

And that'll do it.

So, viv...tell
me how it feels,

You know, to lose
to a "preschooler"?

[Thinking]
everything seems to
be running smoothly.

But that's what worries me.

I would've expected
my little hacker friend
to strike again by now.

Unless...he's already
in kaibaland!

Roland, run a background check
of every competitor...

Is that understood?

Roland: yes, sir!

Until then, everyone
is a suspect.

Alright...i'm through
goin' easy on you!

It's "go time" now!

So wipe that smile
off your face!

Or else I will!

Look out!

There appears to be
some nasty weather
up ahead.

You're not scared
of a little rain...
Are you, kid?

'Cause I activate
the magic card
mystical space typhoon!

Tough break.

Now your trap
goes bye bye.

Later, gravity bind!

Oh, no! Now vivian
can att*ck

With all her
powerful monsters!

Activate
facedown card!

Imperial order!

As long as this trap
remains on my side
of the field,

Your magic cards
are useless!

That brat did it again!

Now I play
the magic card
scapegoat!

Oh, well.
I guess your
storm blew over.

Hold on...why didn't
scapegoat disappear?

Dat's because she
drew scapegoat first

But played it last
and then...no clue.

Yugi: it's simple guys...
The last card played

In a turn always
activates first,

So the first card
has no effect

On the last, even though
it was played first!

Wait so last
is first?

Right, and since rebecca
used scapegoat last,

It was unaffected
by imperial order.

Come on, man.
It's simple.

Then perhaps you'd
like to explain
it to me again.

Okay, twerp!
Playtime's over!

Sure you may've stopped
me from playing any

Of my magic cards...
Or any monster

That has more
than three stars...

But...watch this!

You can't stop me from
playing gyaku-gire panda!

[Growls]

And now to activate
his special power.

For every monster
you have on the field,

My cuddly panda gains
extra points!

[Growls]

Whoa! Now it's got over
, att*ck points!

Err.

What's wrong,
you don't have

Any hidden trap cards
to stop me?

Now, my panda!

att*ck her scapegoat
with kung pow paw!

[Growling]

And since my panda's
att*ck points

Are greater than your
scapegoat's defense points,

The difference comes out
of your life points!

One more att*ck,
and you're bear bait!

What's wrong, bec?

You got the sniffles
'cause my panda

Scratched out most
of your life points

With one swipe
of his paw?

Aw, how sad.

Please.
Ya think I care? No!

[Sighs]

It's not like you
can do anything.

Guess again!

First I'll free up
my magic cards!

Huh?

You know what
happens next, right?

I collect my
life points!

Oh, yeah.
Don't forget

About the points
you lose thanks

To my fire princess!

Ohh!

Err!

You're really starting
to bug me, you little runt!

How sad.

If you don't
like that...

Well...then you're
gonna hate this!

Token thanksgiving!

Sure it destroys
my three remaining
scapegoats,

But it gives me
an extra points
for each one!

[Growls]

Oh, and since I just
got stronger,

My fire princess
takes a few more
points from you.

Hold on...
I've got one more
little surprise

For you, viv!

Injection
fairy lily!

Ha ha ha!

Now I sacrifice
, of my
life points

To make
lily stronger!

att*ck her
overstuffed teddy bear!

[Growling]

Err! Err!

Oh, yeah!
The bec is back!

So the first card's
last?

Then the last card
goes first?

I'm still lost!

I end my turn!

Ok...last chance.

I'll start off...
With this!

It's a handy little
magic card...

Called luminous clouds!

This gives me
the power to sacrifice

My kung fu nyan nyan!

Along with
my master kyonshee

In order to
summon dragon lady!

She can't att*ck
with that thing!

Dragon lady's
a seven-star monster!

That's strange.

I know.
What's she up to?!

Bad news, junior.

Every turn that my dragon
lady doesn't att*ck,

She automatically destroys
one of your magic
or trap cards!

Next I'll activate...
My mystic eruption card!

Now any player who lost
a magic or trap card
this turn

Also loses
a thousand life points!

[Gasps]

Rebecca! No!

Aw, man!
Her life points

Are back
in the gutter again!

So, short stuff...
See what happens

When you party
with the big girls?

Maybe you'd have
better luck

Playing a game
of "go fish!"

But I think
the funniest part
of this whole duel

Is that you actually thought
yugi came here to see you!

Ha ha ha!

Oh, like he came
here to see you!?

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!

If I were about to
lose this duel,

I wouldn't be
laughing.

Huh?

This is where it all
ends, viv.

For you that is.
My move!

The first thing
I'll do is collect

My points from
my good friend marie.

And let's not forget
the points
you lose

Thanks to my
fire princess!

You're still no match
for my dragon lady, shrimp.

Then I guess
I'll just hafta
sacrifice

My two monsters
to play this card!

It's my guardian
angel joan
in att*ck mode!

And since you
already got rid

Of my
gravity bind...

Guardian angel's
able to att*ck!

Hold on!!

Even if you destroy
my dragon lady,

I'll still have
some points left!

Trust me,
I've done the math.

That's why I'm
activating my
silent doom card!

This magic card
lets me bring
one monster back

From the graveyard
in defense mode!

And I choose
fire princess!

Not her again!

Yup, I'm afraid so!

Now guardian angel,
att*ck her dragon lady!

Ohh!

There's only one
thing left to do.

And that's activate
joan's power.

Giving my
life points a boost.

Of course, that in
turn activates

The power
of my fire princess,

Causing you to
lose the rest
of your points!

Great.

Way ta go, rebecca!

That was awesome!

Rebecca:
thanks, tea!

We knew you'd
pull through!

Schmoopie!

I won!

No one comes
between us, viv!

Err! We'll just see!

Joey: hey check it out...

The other match just
ended, too!

And according
to kaiba's chart,

Joey's gonna duel
against whoever
wins this match.

Look. It's dat
pink-haired freak.

Roland: zigfried lloyd will
now face fortune salim!

Oh, ohh, whoa.

You know, weevil.

I'm the one who should
be dueling

In this match, not you!

What!? My
insect deck
is way better!

Hey! Quit stepping
on my ear!

Whoa, whoa, aah!

[Groaning]

Huh? Those two!?

What're they
doin' here!?

Acting like complete
numskulls what else?

Hey! Nice job, spaz!

You're the spaz!

You are!

Hey!

What'd you guys do

With the real
fortune salim?!

Uh, well...you might say
he's tied up right now.

So he asked me
and rex to fill in.

Right, rex?

Uh, that's right!

He thought we would
best fill his shoes.

Yeah, right!
Nice try!

But no one can duel
unless they're
registered!

No fair!!no fair!!

Ziegfried:
just let the boys duel.

After all, I did wear
my favorite suit.

Und I look too good
just to win by forfeit.

I can't.

Think of your
business, herr mokuba.

You wouldn't want to
disappoint your public,

Now would you?

So let me duel
these two fools.

Who you
callin' a fool!?

Yeah! We're not the ones
with the pink hair

And outdated leisure suit!

So watch who you're
callin' a fool, fool!

[Thinking]
I hope you're
watching, herr kaiba.

Because I have a special show
in store just for you.

[Thinking]
I don't trust this guy.

It's time...
To duel!

Heh heh heh.

Alright, punk!
My move!

And I'll start
by summoning

My pinch hopper
in att*ck mode!

Then I'll activate this!

My aerosol!

It exterminates my insect!

And now the real fun
can begin...

Once my pinch hopper's
in the graveyard...

Its special ability
lets me summon

Any insect
monster I want!

And I choose the mightiest
of them all, insect queen!

Alright. Now my partner's
gonna get prehistoric on you!

Well put!
And now...i summon

Balloon lizard
in att*ck mode!

Then I'll use
this card!

Ultra evolution!

Now all I hafta do
is sacrifice
my lizard friend!

That allows me
to summon

Any dinosaur card
that I want!

Meet...
Black tyranno!

[Roaring]

I'd like to see
you get past
my jurassic giant!

And even if you do,
you won't stand a chance

Against
my incredible insect!

We'll see about that, boys.

Ahhh.

What're you
smiling at!?

He's gotta be
bluffing, weevil!

It's time.

My conquest has already
begun to blossom.

Now I shall harvest
my victory...with this.

Ride of the valkyries!

Behold! The most dazzling
creatures in duel monsters!

And also the most dangerous!

[Horses neighing]

Hey...
What's going on?!

Where's
my insect queen!?

And my tyranno!?

Uh...weevil?

Tell me that
didn't just happen.

That didn't just happen.

[Horses neighing]

Heh heh heh.

Roland: the winner
of this bout--

After only one turn--

Is zigfried lloyd!

♪ Your move

♪ Yu-gi-oh!

♪ Yu-gi-oh!