02x08 - Labor Pains

[bunniefuu]

In 1972, a cr*ck commando unit
was sent to prison by a m*llitary court...

for a crime they didn't commit.

These men promptly escaped
from a maximum-security stockade...

to the Los Angeles underground.

Today, still wanted by the government,
they survive as soldiers of fortune.

If you have a problem,
if no one else can help...

and if you can find them,
maybe you can hire the A-Team.

Beautiful, B.A.

Guard us, mighty Ouija.
Are we still being pursued?

Man, shut up and put that board up.

Ouija confirms we're still being pursued.

When you've got an inside track,
why leave things to chance?

I'm gonna leave that sucker for dead.

B.A., turn left here.

- We got them now, sir.
- We've had them before.

- Hannibal, didn't you see that sign?
- Of course he did.

- The bridge is out. What are we gonna do?
- Cross it.

Better put the hammer down.
Unless you want me to drive.

The bridge is just up ahead.

Where the A-Team becomes the B-Team.

They're crazy.

What's the matter, Decker? No guts?

Enjoy it now, Smith!

Enjoy it? I love it.

I'll radio for help.

Fairvale. This looks
like a good little town to hang out in.

It's not gonna take Decker long
to get himself pulled off the bridge.

We should keep moving,
not hang around town.

Yeah, Hannibal. Come on.

The last few times Decker got really close,
you pulled the same trick:

hiding right under his nose,
making him think we're halfway out of state.

He's gonna figure that game out.

Yeah, but he'll figure I figured that...

so he'll figure that I figured the other way.

- Which is why we're staying right here.
- That makes no sense.

Decker will understand it.

B.A., what do you think about that hotel?

The Padded Pillow?

Nice. Wonder if it has
indoor plumbing.

Is it a good hotel?

Three stars, reasonable rates,
king-size beds...

Magic Fingers in the mattresses...

for 25 cents.

It said all that?

You get used to it.

Come on, Face.

Murdock, you and Amy
check us in to the motel.

We're gonna cross to that store
and pick up some grub.

How does bologna and whole-wheat sound?

Actually, Colonel,
it makes almost no sound at all.

Mr. Cross? There's a couple of those pickers
in the store now.

Yeah, the brother and the sister.

Well, I did tell them,
but they don't seem to care none.

Yes, sir. No problem at all.

Look, I told you
that you aren't shopping here.

Hold on, Danton.

We got money, we agreed
to pay your prices, now leave us alone.

I don't care what you got.

Just get on out of here before
you find yourselves looking for a new head.

You just do what a slime bag
like Cross says, no matter who's hurting?

Don't you understand? Those people will
die if they don't have anything to eat.

This is my market,
and I say who does and doesn't shop here.

Excuse me.

If you're gonna stay in business...

you're gonna need
a better customer-relations policy...

and some more stock.

Does the whole town run on beans?

We're a little low on stock right now
because of Mr. Jarrett's barbecue tomorrow.

Mr. Jarrett's barbecue.

So while Jarrett and the others
stuff themselves...

the people who work their butts off
in his fields starve?

We also have children out there.

Hey, man, I don't like to hear about
people starving. Especially little children.

All right. Go ahead.
But don't say I didn't warn you.

You folks go ahead
and get your shopping done now.

I guess that does it. What's wrong?

I told you people
you couldn't use this store.

What's the matter, you hard of hearing?

Cross, you people might control our wages,
but that's as far as it goes.

The man's right.

I see you've been down to the train yard
and got yourself some Camp Fire Boys.

You know, your first impression, mister,
is just like a lizard's breath.

I haven't started to make
a first impression yet.

- Get out of here.
- You heard him. Now!

Can't. We're market marshals...

bringing justice to the produce aisles
and freezer sections of America.

You better listen to him.

- I'm gonna give you a lot of pain.
- I'm gonna say this one time.

Threats appeal a whole lot more to us
than they do to ordinary people.

It would be in your interest
to keep that in mind...

and let these people take their food
and get out of here.

Let's get out of here.

Let's go, come on!

I really wanna thank you for your help.
I wish we could do something to repay you.

- Forget it.
- It was our pleasure.

At least I got my appetite back.

Cross isn't gonna let something like this go.
You'd be a lot safer if you left town.

We'd be a lot safer
if we were somebody else altogether.

As it is, we'll just go back to the motel
and get some sleep.

- Nice to meet you folks.
- Well, we...

Thanks a lot.

Jarrett's gonna have our guts
for what happened back there.

You think maybe those guys
are outside agitators?

I don't care who they are.

I want you to find them, pull them out
of the ground, and saw them up.

You guys watch too many old movies.

We had to see you.

- You could have knocked.
- Or called.

Who are these guys?

Those are the two
we got the food for this afternoon.

B.A., watch the hall.

Look, we couldn't let you pull out
without a word.

After we saw how you handled those men...

we knew you were our only chance
to stand up for what we got coming.

They wouldn't even let you shop for food.
What'd you do?

Why are they putting pressure on you?

The guy doing it to us is Ted Jarrett.

He's the biggest grower in the valley. That
ain't the only biggest thing he is, either.

The man is slowly k*lling us.

He pays sl*ve wages
and he grinds the pickers into the ground.

Why don't you just tell this Jarrett
you're not working for him anymore?

Then what?

My sister and I,
we're from all the way down near Red Rock.

The others who were picked up there
drifted in from who knows where.

Jarrett brought us down here in these
special buses with all kinds of promises...

of good pay, housing, schools for our kids.

- Heck, we're living in tents.
- No schools, no inside plumbing.

They treat us like animals,
and we can't afford to leave.

But we can't work all day
for a couple of dollars...

that barely buys us a can of beans.

Jarrett gets the local storekeepers
to hit us with higher prices...

so our money keeps us right where we are
but won't let us get ahead.

- Instant sl*ve labor.
- It's a nice little touch of the Third Reich.

Have you tried standing up to this guy?

That's what we were doing
when you guys helped us out.

I managed to get most of the workers
to pull together...

and refuse to pick Jarrett's crops.

So Jarrett has the whole town
shut down to us.

Even though he can't get his crops picked,
we can't get any food.

There's a lot of people here
with their families with them.

With older parents and children.
They're just about ready to give in.

They won't sit back and watch them starve.

My brother convinced them
we could go into town...

to get some stuff to put together
a stew or something.

Everyone chipped in whatever dollars
they had around...

but even with your help it wasn't enough
to feed the ones who were really hurting.

- How many people you got living out there?
- We got 45 workers. Nine are children.

How badly does Jarrett have
to get that crop out of the ground?

There's been storm clouds threatening
for the last couple of days...

and he knows that one good heavy rain,
and it'll wipe him completely out.

Right down to the wire.

Just the way we like it.

- Here they come.
- Just like they promised.

- Hello.
- Hi.

Hi, thanks for coming.

The others are waiting.
I'll go round them up.

- Do they know why we're here?
- Yeah. I just hope they'll go along with us.

No. We can't keep standing around here
like this.

We gotta get out there at them fields.

We got children, mister.
Sick folk need our help.

We need food, you hear me?
And plenty of it.

And what makes you think
Jarrett's gonna give it to you now?

He never did before!

All he ever gave us was promises,
and you can't eat those.

Gary's right.
If we can just hold out that much longer!

We can't, girl. Take a look around.

Jarrett's got as much trouble as you do.

If he doesn't get that crop picked,
he goes belly up.

- You all know that, don't you?
- Yeah.

You've got to make that work for you.

You use that, you gain strength.

Strength? We have no strength.

Strength comes in numbers, and in unity.

If you look around,
you got all the strength you need here.

I'll tell you this, it ain't gonna be pretty.
It's gonna be a fight.

It's gonna be a knock-down, drag-out,
go-for-the-throat kind of fight.

You'll have to come down
off your high chairs and go with this thing.

You've got to be willing
to back each other up.

- What you need is a union.
- A union?

A union? Jarrett will
never go for that.

I don't think we planned on asking him.

We don't have enough food
to last us another day.

The last thing we want
is to see your families suffer.

But if we get you food for two days...

long enough for us to get around the valley,
get to the other pickers, get them together...

will you stick with it?

- What say?
- Don't know.

Come on, people. What do we got to lose?

Yeah, Gary's right.
We got nothing to lose!

He's gonna feed us.

Okay, mister, you got 24 hours.

You'll have something to eat
before sundown.

Where are you gonna get enough food
to feed all these people?

Watch.

- How are you, Mrs. Jarrett?
- Fine.

- Can I talk to you a second?
- Yeah, Bert. Excuse me, honey.

You better have some good news
for me, boy.

I got McCullen and Bailey
breathing down my spine...

'cause no workers showed up again
this morning.

They're hanging in there.
Don't know how, but they are.

Then break them.

You told me nobody got enough
food out of that market to feed a gnat.

I swear to you,
if they got a mouthful, it would be a lot.

- They gotta cave in pretty soon.
- They better.

'Cause that crop ain't gonna last any more
than a couple of days.

These skies open up, and we're awash.

And you told me that wouldn't happen.

- Don't worry.
- I am worried!

That means
you better worry, too.

Okay. I'll get Giddings
and we'll get them out of there tomorrow.

Those bulldogs we had the fight with
at the market...

had checked out of the hotel
when we got there this morning.

I'm damn sure
they weren't union reps.

That's all we need,
a couple of Robin Hood types.

Well, they're probably just passing through.
Long gone by now.

What are you doing with them beans?

I spent seven hours on every bean
in that stinking pot.

I don't want them bashed around
like a bucket of bolts.

When it says stir them beans, stir them.

It's not a bludgeon m*rder.

Looks like it's about time
for the main course.

Down here, you two.

Ladies and gentlemen...

we apologise for interrupting your party
with g*nf*re.

But it was the only way...

that we could collect
Mr. Jarrett's generous food donation...

without getting blown out of our socks
by his bodyguards.

Now, Miss Allen here will supervise
the loading of the truck...

and I'm sure you four gentlemen
will be happy to assist the lady.

You four, now!

Let's go. You boys wanna move this pig?
Be careful not to drop the apple, please.

I don't know what you think you're doing,
but you're never going to get away with this.

You've shorted your workers' pay
to the degree they can't feed their families.

There's hungry women and children
out there.

Hungry children?

If they don't wanna work here,
they can get another job!

No, they can't!
They've already been here 10 weeks.

It's too late in the season
to go anywhere else.

It's 50 miles to the nearest bus station,
and they have no means of transportation.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself,
Jarrett.

So, to make things right...

I think you ought to cough up
what you owe them. Right now.

Unless you want us to take you back
and you can explain it to the workers.

- Without your guards.
- Read him the score, Face.

You got 45 workers you shorted $20 a week.

That's $900 for 10 weeks,
or $9,000 you owe us.

Not counting what you cheated them
for at the market...

which is what put them in this situation
in the first place.

Of course, we would look kindly
on any donations.

That diamond ring you're wearing there,
for instance.

Nice.

About $8,500?

- How'd you know that?
- Hobby of mine.

That leaves us $1,000 you owe us...

plus 9.9%% interest of $891.25.

Ante up, Jarrett.

$1,500. Very good.

Well, that still leaves us $391.25.

Don't you wanna help out your boss, pal?

There's $400.

$400. Here's your change.

Let's see, that's $8...

and 75 cents.

Your heart's in the right place.

I thank you.

The A-Team thanks you.

The newly founded Workers' Cooperative
thanks you.

You're never gonna get away with this!

You'll have a union in this valley
over my dead body!

That's exactly what I was telling
our union members this morning.

We're working on a theme song
and uniforms...

and I'm pushing for matching bow ties.

And not that clip-on junk.
Those are for geeks.

And geeks are a whole other union.

You're nuts!

No, I'm not, I'm condiments.
I've been promoted.

Go, B.A.

Giddings, close the gate.

Things are coming together nicely.

You've got a funny idea of how things
come together. Look at the gate.

Watch how I make things come apart.

See?

This is one of Jarrett's fields.
Pull over, B.A.

Oh, man, there's nothing like the smell
of fresh vegetables in the earth...

to make a man's heart sing.

Especially cabbages, don't you think?

I hate cabbages.
Don't be talking about them.

That is because you don't know anything
about them.

For instance,
here is a little bit of trivia for you:

Did you know that if you take a cabbage
from the field where it grew up...

and sell it to somebody 100 miles away,
often it will escape and find its way home?

That particular strain of cabbage
is called a homing cabbage...

or in Latin, Headius homus.

- Now, shall we say it together?
- No.

What do you mean, "no"?
I'm telling you, it's a great vegetable.

Nice catch. Next time, try tomatoes.
I hear he loves tomatoes.

I like cabbages.

Excuse me, ma'am. I've got something
I would like you to read after work.

It might be helpful for you and the little girl.

Thank you.

Hi.

Excuse me, senor.

We'd like for you to read this
when you get off work.

Hiya, fellows. How you doing?
I got something for you to read here.

On your break, of course.
I wouldn't want you to read it until then.

There you go. Then, take a look at it...

talk it over, and if you have any questions,
I'll be around to answer them. There you go.

No, I guess not.

Remember, fellows, there's no legal way
your employer can stop you...

from reading this material on your own time.

All right, that's enough.

You're getting these people's mind
off their work. Move it.

You heard me. I told them not to read it
unless it was on one of their breaks.

- It's perfectly legal, pal. Ask any lawyer.
- Move, or I drop you.

You don't believe me.

Perhaps you would care
to check with our union representative.

- Union rep? What are you talking about?
- Right there.

He's talking about me hurting you.

I had a feeling he could explain it to you
better than I.

Thanks for your support.

While you're standing around
looking tough, why not take a look?

Or get somebody to read it to you.

What is this garbage?
Who do they think they're kidding?

They're not kidding. They're dead serious.

They've opened up a union hall
here in town and everything.

Then what I heard is true.

They're supposed to be having
a secret meeting someplace.

If they vote that union in,
they could make it stick.

That means none of the crops here
will get picked for a decent profit...

and that means a lot of money lost, Cross.

That's not gonna happen.

We're gonna find out
where that meeting is, and when.

You just make sure you stop them
before they ever get to vote.

And I don't care how.

Yes, sir. Get right on it.

That'll give us plenty of room
for the square dance.

Darling, don't worry about the Guernseys.
We'll move them.

Do we have enough paper?

Do we have enough staples?

Is he okay?

- Actually, I think it's a quiet day.
- Yes, absolutely. Ciao.

That does it. I just got us a meeting place.

It's a barn over on old Peach Tree Road.

Yeah. I can't believe you got someone
to lend their private property around here.

When you have a good cause,
things are bound to come your way.

- What was her name?
- Inga.

- Very Continental.
- Yeah, she certainly is.

Gary, are those banners ready?

Not yet, but they'll be ready
by meeting time.

Do we have enough staples?

Please answer, big one,
for we sense great danger.

There you have it, guys.

We can rest easy on the staple front.
We got plenty.

Staples isn't what I'm worried about. Does it
say anything about Cross and Jarrett?

You know they're not gonna sit back and
let us establish this union without a fight.

This thing ain't got nothing to say
about nothing.

It's this fool moving it all the time.

B.A., you've got to expand your mind...

beyond rational, intelligent,
justifiable explanations.

They ought to open up your head
and give you a new brain.

That will help us all.

Please tell me, great spirit...

is it getting ready to hit the fan?

Let's give them our vote.

Let's go.

Now, isn't that just our luck.

That nice sign that Amy painted for us
got all blown up.

Face, didn't I tell you to move it over there?

I'm sorry, Hannibal. That's right, you did.

I told you we couldn't put it there.
That's Mr. Jarrett's property.

I'm sorry.

I wish I could be with you
when you tell him. Don't you?

Not really.

They seem disappointed.

Let's go.

Jarrett's gonna plant us
with his next crop, man.

No, he's not, 'cause we're gonna have
some good news for him.

When you find out where that meeting is...

I want you to round up
every piece of muscle in this valley...

and have them there.

We're gonna bust some heads.

You think we'll find out where that
secret meeting place is by tomorrow?

Watch me.

Jimmy, honey, come on in now.
It's getting dark.

What do you want?

- You leave him alone!
- Hold it. Talk to me first.

Where and when
is that union meeting taking place?

You give me back my boy!

- Where and when?
- Please, I can't.

No, wait!

Tomorrow, at 5:00.

At the barn on old Peach Road.
Now, please, let him go.

If you're lying to me,
my friend's gonna take that boy...

- on a long walk and he's not coming back.
- I've told you the truth.

- Please, let him go.
- I'm gonna hold you to it.

Jimmy! Honey, are you okay?

- Did he hurt you?
- No.

God, I'm sorry.

You people are awfully good
at putting things together.

- You got some kind of special trick?
- The trick is whatever we want, we get.

- It's just the jazz.
- The jazz?

Yeah, the jazz is
all the Twinkies you can eat...

and Woody Woodpecker cartoons
24 hours a day.

Face, she wants to know
what the jazz is.

Well, Laura, you see,
it's sort of nature's way...

of putting your fingers in a light socket.

Our problem is he likes it.

- Say, Face.
- What?

You got a great barn here.

You asked for a meeting hall, Hannibal.
I got you a meeting hall.

Yeah, but we need a little window dressing.

Window dressing.

Can you believe that
"window dressing" cr*ck Hannibal made?

He doesn't realise what it takes
to procure something from nothing.

- The training and experience.
- Man, who you trying to kid?

You probably conned all the babies
at the maternity ward in the hospital...

- where you was born.
- I know I have a certain flair for persuasion.

But Hannibal, he overlooks the fact
that it takes a real talent.

Like any other fine art.

Let me roll the window down.
Getting smoky in here.

And there's a lot that goes into it.

It's a very delicate balance. It's not easy.

And, if I do say so myself,
I am rather gifted at it.

Man, if Hannibal didn't put you
on the team...

- you'd probably be in jail right now.
- True.

- Pull up there, just ahead of that flatbed.
- Right.

Hi, there.

- Arturo Wainright. I'm with G.V.F.T.M.B.
- Say what?

Greater Valley
Farm Truck Maintenance Bureau.

Newsweek did a rather flattering article
on us.

- Good reading, if I do say so myself.
- Greater Valley?

Ain't never heard of that one.

Well, you see,
we're sort of a new consumer organization.

Ralph Nader has approved us.

What we do is run random checks
of agro-vehicles.

Make sure they are all operating
up to U.S. Department standards.

Your vehicle's lucky enough
to have been chosen.

Congratulations. It's kind of a privilege.

- By the way, I didn't catch the name.
- Didn't throw it.

Anyway, see, we give you
a few legal papers...

guaranteeing that we'll bring
your truck back exactly like we found it.

And we do some
actual documented farm work.

Real hauling on a pre-arranged test farm...

right here in this very area.

- So you wanna take the truck?
- There you go.

And at absolutely no cost or obligation
to you whatsoever.

Darn good deal,
if you want a little off-the-record opinion.

Now, you check these legal papers here.

They promise you
that we'll bring the truck back.

If not, you can call
the U.S. Department of Agriculture yourself.

You sure do dress up for a government man.

Those a pair of them hoochie shoes?

That's Gucci.

- No, these are just a regular kind of brown...
- What size you say them slippers was?

I didn't.

Looks like about a 10.

Same as mine.

Great work, Face.
Priceless creativity.

That's a wonderful pair of boots.

The farmer I negotiated with wanted
a little rental fee for the use of his truck.

So, my priceless creativity
is gonna cost you.

What do you think, B.A.?
Can you convert it?

Of course. I just have to change
the feed system.

Go to it, Sergeant.

Get down from there, sucker,
we got work to do.

Get down from there, sucker,
we got work to do.

- Are you sure nobody knows we're coming?
- My contact says they don't know a thing.

I don't want anybody
running out of that barn.

Not until they realise
what happens to people...

who come into this valley to try to shove
a union down my throat.

Don't worry, boss.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I wanna thank you for showing up today.

I wanna thank you,
because when you leave...

there's gonna be a union in this valley
that the growers cannot stop.

That's right.

No longer are they gonna be able
to pay you less than you deserve...

for the kind of work you're doing.

Time now.

And another thing, you're never gonna get
ripped off again!

What do you think? Pretty good turnout.

I got to be honest.
I never thought we'd get this far.

I thought Jarrett would stop us, for sure.

All right, folks, listen.

We're gonna hand out some ballots
for you to vote on.

Now, all you do is check "yes"
for "I want a union"...

or "no" for "I don't."

Then we'll gather them, count them,
and see where we stand.

But I wanna urge you to vote "yes."

That's the only choice
that makes any sense here.

Murdock, you copy?

Murdock, wake up.

Do you copy?

Of course I copy. Four cents a copy.
Do you copy?

Are you watching the road?

Sure. It's just laying there
like a big old tongue, going...

Can I come down now?

There ain't nobody come or gone
in an hour. I'm lonely up here.

Besides, you luck-outs have gotten
all the punch and cookies.

We'll save you some. Just hang in there.

Jarrett's gonna crash this place
sooner or later.

Okay. 10-4, from a listless guy.

What are you looking at, pal?

As you cast your vote, remember,
this is a message that will tell Jarrett...

you're not
a bunch of scared people anymore.

You're a union, and as a union,
you cannot be pushed around.

Not now, not ever.

He sure is talking up a storm.
Is that the jazz?

More like a tap dance.

But we think you might get to see
the real thing very soon.

Hannibal.

Hannibal, are you there?

- What's happening, Murdock?
- They're here.

- You know what to do.
- 10-4.

- Looks like we scared them off.
- Looks that way, doesn't it?

Hey, Jarrett!

Glad you came to the party.

All right, you can be the first
to congratulate the workers.

- I'll believe that when I see it.
- Take a look.

We just counted the last vote.
It's unanimous, Mr. Jarrett.

- This union's approved.
- Congratulations.

Great family feeling.

- You all set to roll out of here?
- Yeah. We got to get going.

I guess you'll be okay.

The NLRB rep is coming
in a couple days to stamp everything.

Jarrett and Cross
won't have a leg to stand on.

Well, good. Good luck to you.

Thank you.
If you guys are ever around here...

- We'll definitely stop by and say hello.
- You're all welcome here anytime.

I fixed the cooler.
You should have some fresh air pretty soon.

Will Local One prosper?

There you have it.

An utterly unimpeachable
prognosis for success.

Murdock, what would we do without you?

Don't worry, Colonel.
I'm sure you could find 10 or 15 good...

Wait a minute.

Decker is coming.

I'm tired of all this nonsense.

No, it...

Yeah.

Great, Hannibal.

You figured that Decker figured
that you figured it the other way, right?

- Decker didn't figure it that way, did he?
- Sure, he did.

Do we have enough gas?