.
I see your point,
mr. Baldwin
And I have to say...
Miles, please, I may be
a network v.p.
But we can drop
this "mr. Baldwin" business.
Let's do this
on a first-name basis.
Well, thank you.
It means a lot to know
You think of me
as an equal... Mitch.
It's mitchell.
Of course.
Mitchell.
What was I thinking?
You're not a mitch.
I went to school
with a mitch.
He was a short, fat, jewish kid.
You're tall
and thin, and...
Probably not jewish.
Everybody listen up.
When I left last night
Babar was holding a big,
fuzzy peanut in his trunk.
It was a gift
from rosalynn carter
To my son franklin delano brown.
I'm going to put him
on this desk.
If babar isn't sucking
on that shell by : tonight
Somebody better be prepared
to kiss their goobers good-bye.
Murphy, if I can tear you away
from this major investigation.
Sure, mitchell, what's up?
You call him mitchell?
Yeah, what else am I going
To call him? Mitch?
Morning, guys.
Hi, mitchell.
You too?
Morning, mitchell.
Um, frank,
you should
hear this too.
As you may know
I'm overseeing the network's
new overnight news show.
We are very excited.
We want to get
the public excited
I want your help.
Miles, I could use your input here.
Really?
My input?
Of course.
Starting at : a.m.
We'll have hours
of features, weather, sports
And a viewer call-in segment.
How do we get our show
To stand out
from the competition?
Got it.
We push the fact
That the show originates
in washington.
News from the news capital.
It's an interesting thought, miles,
but I don't think so.
Anyway...
How about
we go casual--
Really hit
that late-night feeling?
Loose tie,
rolled-up sleeves.
Intriguing, but no.
What I've been considering
is using star power
To kick off the
first week--
A different team
of well-known
anchors each night.
Mitchell,
that's one way of going.
Actually, that is
the way we're going.
But I like the fact
that you kept swinging.
Remember, it only takes one hit
Every three at bats
to make it to the hall of fame.
And as of now, you're for .
There's talk of
trading you to the cubs
For a producer
to be named later.
Can we move things along here?
Absolutely. We've lined up some
of our best people.
For our first show,
I want our a-team--
Murphy brown,
frank fontana...
Us?
Me?
You want me to be an anchor?
I'm play catch up
from my maternity leave.
So I'll have to pass.
He wants me
to be an anchor.
And there's nothing
I can do to change your mind?
Change my mind?
You know, that's a concept
I never really grasped.
Now, if you'll
excuse me
Babar and I
have work to do.
Well, this is
a disappointment.
Yeah, it won't be
The same without her.
Do I get my own desk?
Actually, frank
I'm afraid the concept
was for a team.
I can work with anyone.
Well, not anyone.
I draw the line
at gene shalit.
I hear he clips his nails
during commercial breaks.
Katie couric told me
she almost lost an eye.
I'm sorry, frank.
I have to do
a major rethink.
Miles, I'm going t o need your
input on this one.
Oh, god.
Hey, murph.
Do you believe baldwin?
Trying to make us
his opening-night shills?
I'm not doing it.
Murph, I need this.
It's my chance
to show the network
I have what it
takes to carry a show.
Besides, you and me together?
It will be fun.
You want fun?
Send dan quayle
a where's waldo book
Then stand back
And watch
his head explode.
Murph...
Murph, it's just one night.
Is that so much to ask?
After incredibly close
years of friendship?
We're almost the same size.
If you ever need
a lung or a kidneys
I'll sign something
for you right now.
A little more snow in here
We could go tobogganing.
I understand.
I don't want to ask you
to do something
You're not up to anymore.
What does that mean?
It's okay, murph. Motherhood can
take a lot out of a person.
So you've lost
a step or two.
That is nothing for you
to be ashamed of.
Don't do this to me.
And I want you to know that
I don't think any less of you
Just because the old murph
would have done it...
I hate you!
So you'll do it?
Yes. But you owe me.
You owe me big.
Sure. Listen, I got
to get to baldwin
Before he finds
somebody else.
I mean it, frank.
I'm not waiting
until I get sick.
I want that kidney
in my fridge tonight.
Three minutes to air.
Buzz ramsey, the director.
Frank fontana, the anchor.
This is pretty exciting,
isn't it?
The kickoff episode
Of what could become
television history.
I'm here, I'm awake.
Don't push it.
And don't talk to me
about television history.
I used to be at
the top of this business.
Chet huntley's golden boy, they called me.
Remember
"good night, david"?
That was mine.
Now look at me.
I'm on opposite
talmud talk with rabbi dave
On public access.
This could be the start
Of something big for you.
Look at nightline.
You're a very chipper young man.
Give it a rest.
All right, let's get this over with.
We got three hours to k*ll.
Breaking stories
at the top of the hour.
Yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Features, yadda, yadda, yadda.
You take some phone calls.
Who's doing the
weather report? You?
Yeah, right, and then
I'm going to demonstrate
How to make wreaths
out of common garden succulents.
No, no problem.
I'll do the weather.
Well, I'm gratified.
Sports updates
once an hour.
I can do that.
Local station breaks
every minutes.
I'll introduce them.
Aren't you the busy beaver!
If that's all settled...
I have two tapes on
the "freedom of speech" piece.
The longer one runs
in the first hour.
Will you remember that?
Gee, after years in this business,
I hope I don't get mixed up.
I'm going to walk to
the booth now, okay?
Left foot, right foot,
left foot.
How am I doing?
Hey. Either of you two
want to get in the pool?
What pool?
We're betting on how many
eggs larry over there
Can stuff in his mouth during
the first commercial break.
Okay, everybody.
I know some of you
may not exactly be overjoyed
To be working at this hour
But we're all professionals here.
If I can show up
And do what I'm being
paid to do, so can you.
Yeah. How much
are you making tonight?
That's not really
the point, is it?
I was thinking more
of the satisfaction gained
From a job well done.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ramsey:
seconds to air.
And put me down for eggs.
That was real smooth, murph.
Bring up the pay issue.
Probably going to sh**t me
so close
I'll look like
a blowfish on camera.
Cue music.
In five, four, three, two...
Good morning,
I'm murphy brown.
And I'm frank fontana.
Welcome to the first edition of
overnight news.
...so, the question remains:
At what point does free expression
Collide with one's obligation
to be socially responsible?
Frank?
Thanks, murphy.
And in our next hour
we'll be taking your calls
To discuss
the issue of free speech
As well as recapping
the top stories.
Stay with us.
We're clear.
This is really going well,
don't you think, murph?
It's a whole new world for me.
Begin out in front, running things.
I really, really love it.
Geez, frank, pace yourself.
We've got two hours to go, and
you're pumping enough adrenalin
To give a gazelle
cardiac arrest.
Stage manager:
coming back. In five,
Four, three...
(Yawning:)
welcome back.
We're about to take calls
On the issue
of freedom of speech.
How far is too far?
And our first call
is from dayton, ohio.
You're on the air.
Woman:
yes, I believe that
Free speech is being hurt
by an unfair judicial system.
I myself get called
for jury duty
At least once every six months
And then, they never pick me.
On top of which
the parking is just terrible.
Excuse me.
While that's
very thought-provoking
Tonight we're discussing
freedom of speech.
I know.
I'm using my freedom of speech
to talk about jury duty.
And you just did.
Let's go now
to lowell, massachusetts.
You're on the air.
Man:
yeah, I'd like to comment
on the proposed
Seven-day waiting period
to buy a handgun.
What's the point?
After seven days,
I'm not mad anymore.
Look, maybe I didn't
make myself clear.
The topic tonight
is freedom of speech.
Not jury duty.
Not g*n control.
Freedom of speech.
I don't want to have
to say this again.
I don't mean
to push you, sir,
But would you mind
getting to your question?
Yes, of course, I'm sorry.
Anyway, what would happen
if you were on a plane
That was about to crash
And just before
it hit the ground
You jumped up as hard
as you could?
Well, roy from pittsburgh
Your head would probably
rip through the roof
With such force
That whatever
brain cells you may have had
Murphy brown
would be picked up
with the stray luggage.
But I see it's time
for both our next commercial
And your medication.
We'll be back after this.
Stage manager:
clear.
Murph, what are you doing?
You can't talk
like that on the air
Why not?
Face it, frank,
it's : a.m.
The only people watching us
are just k*lling time
Till the next commercial
Where that guy cuts his kid's hair
with a vacuum cleaner.
Okay, we've had a few crackpots.
It's not like all the calls
were that weird.
You really think we had a conversation
with the queen of england?
Well, you've got to admit
Was pretty convincing.
Oh, man, listen to me.
You were right, murph.
This is a nightmare.
My big chance to be an anchor.
What the hell was I thinking?
I'm sorry I dragged you into this.
Oh, frank.
It's not that bad.
It's not every day
we get to talk to a man
Who claims to have the only
baskin-robbins franchise
On the lost
continent of atlantis.
Cut it out, murph.
Don't get me started.
I'm punchy enough already.
Coming back with weather
in seconds.
Let's just get through the rest
of the show and try to escape
with as much dignity as we can.
Oh, whoa.
Look how big I am.
Puny earthlings, bow to me.
I am fontana.
Hey, frank.
I got a weather
bulletin for you--
Hail.
Cut it out!
In five, four, three...
Welcome back.
Thank you for staying up with us
on the overnight news.
I'm frank fontana.
It is : a.m.
And if you're just joining us,
what the heck
are you doing up at this hour?
Anyway, let's
have another look at the weather.
The midwest is still...
There it is...
Feeling the effect
of a record cold front.
Fergus falls, minnesota
Had a record low
of five degrees.
And I'll
bet in that kind of cold
When fergus falls,
he has a hard time getting up.
Look at this,
I woke up the crew.
Anyway, let's get back
to the weather here.
Murphy, could you
come help me out?
What?
Just come on
over here.
Just stand here
like this.
Ladies and gentlemen,
hands across america.
Hi, frank.
I just watched
a tape of last night's show.
And I think we might have gone
a little bit to far.
I can't believe
we actually called the white house
At : in the morning
And told them we were
the clintons' decorators
And could we come over
And take
some measurements.
Hey, I wasn't the one using
the cheesy italian accent
Mr. Fabrizzio of georgetown.
Man, this was my one chance
to show the network
I had what it takes
to be an anchor.
Baldwin gave me a sh*t.
I made a fool of myself.
Come on, frank.
You don't have anything
to prove to the network.
They know you're
an important part of f.y.i.
"Part of the team."
It's just like in high school,
when I went out for track.
I wanted to be a sprinter
in the -yard dash.
Everybody always watched
the sprinters
But coach jawarski put me in
the two-mile relay.
I was the second man
in a four-man race.
I didn't start.
I didn't finish.
I handed the baton to the guy
Who handed the baton
to the guy who finished.
While I was running
most people
went off to the snack bar.
I always thought
Just once, I would like
to be the guy in front--
The one that everybody watches.
You probably think
this is really silly, don't you?
I don't think it's silly, frank.
I think it's pathetic!
You have an exciting job you love
You won a humboldt award.
You earn a ton of money.
But you can't get past
being the human tortoise
Years ago?
Okay, fine. Let's drop the whole thing.
No, no, no, no.
I want to understand this.
So, because
you weren't a sprinter
You want to be an anchor now.
You want to stop the
brilliant field reporting you love
And spend the rest
of your career behind a desk
"Thanks for that report, bob."
No, that's what
you're saying.
What I'm saying is...
Oh, look, nevermind.
It doesn't matter.
After what happened last night
They'll never going to give me
another chance to anchor anyway.
Stop wallowing, frank.
It wasn't that bad.
Maybe you didn't notice,
but at about a quarter to :
When you were
doing your report
On the prime minister
of australia
I hopped across the set
Holding your purse
in front of me like a pouch.
Yeah, right.
Really?
Corky:
good morning, sleepyheads.
How did the show go last night?
You mean you didn't watch it?
Heavens no.
I can't stay up that late.
You think
I'm going to come to work
With my face all puffy
and bags under my eyes
Looking like something
the cat dragged in?
Sorry, murphy.
I tried to tape it.
But doris got me one of those
a*t*matic vcr programmers
for our anniversary.
I must have pushed
the wrong button
Because I ended up
with some show about impotence
Hosted by lyle waggoner.
See, frank?
I told you nobody watched it.
Lend me your tape, frank.
I'll view it tonight.
What? Oh, I'm sorry, jim.
I didn't get a chance
to tape it.
Oh, sure, frank.
If he doesn't
want us to see it
It probably means something
really bad happened.
Tim, go get a copy of
the overnight news from video.
Everyone, screening
in my office in ten minutes.
I'm doomed.
I see.
That's an interesting
concept, miles, but no.
Hi, mitchell.
Murphy, frank,
I thought
You'd be catching up
on your sleep after last night.
Well, you know us.
Always on the job.
I guess you didn't see
The show last night.
I saw it... All three hours
from beginning to end.
Start to finish.
Did you see it, miles?
As a matter of fact,
I did catch the first hour.
Good.
What did you think?
I'd like your input.
My input?
Well, I could try to guess
what you want to hear.
That way, at least, I'd have
a - chance of being right
But I'm not going to do that.
I'm going to tell you
what I actually thought.
No matter what.
I thought it was good.
I agree.
You do?
The first hour was very good.
I wish
you had seen the rest.
I didn't, which means
I couldn't possibly have an opinion on it.
Which means
I'm walking away a winner!
He's a good man
but high-strung.
He's like a dog that's been
beaten by a previous owner.
Now, about
those last two hours.
Uh, mitchell, what happened
on the air last night
Was mostly my fault.
It was late.
I got punchy.
So if there are any repercussions
I should be the one to deal with them.
No, wait, murph.
I can't let you take
all the blame.
I probably should have
tried harder to stop her.
As I was saying,
the first hour was very good
And the rest of it...
Got a terrific
audience response.
You're kidding.
What?
We made a mistake.
We went in with a show
that was too serious
for that time slot.
You showed us that people want
irreverence and unpredictability
At that time of night.
So you liked it?
Me? No.
I've never been a big fan
Of kangaroo
imitations, frank.
But you can't argue
with ratings.
We'll revamp the format
To incorporate
that free-wheeling spirit
You so deftly
brought to the screen.
Oh great.
Just what this country needs,
more wacky news.
You're interrupting, murph.
You were talking about
my free-wheeling spirit.
Well, simply put,
you have exactly the quality
We want in an anchor
for the new overnight news.
Oh, wow.
Did you hear that, murph?
"Exactly the quality."
All my life, i... I've waited
to hear something like that.
I always thought I'd
know exactly how to respond.
But, uh, now...
I love my work
and I'm proud of it.
And I don't think
I'd ever really be happy
doing anything else.
I guess the important thing
was having it offered to me.
But I'm afraid
I'm going to have to say no.
That's a courageous
decision, frank.
And you can't imagine
how disappointed I would be
If I were actual
offering you the job.
What?
I wasn't offering you
the job, frank.
You weren't offering me the job?
You already have a job on f.y.i.
I just have to find
a frank fontana type.
Someone a little cheaper...
And probably a little younger.
Well... How about that, murph?
I just turned down a job
I wasn't even offered.
The final "kick me" sign
on the butt that is my life.
The point is
you turned it down.
The old frank would have
jumped at that job.
You turned it down because
you're happy with who you are.
That's a real
sign of growth, frank.
You're right.
Maybe I've got more
self-esteem than I thought.
Maybe I don't need...
Constant validation
To feel good
about myself anymore.
Maybe I am finally at
the point in my life
Where I don't care
what other people think.
Hey everybody, I've got the tape.
Oh, my god.
Tim!
Tim, give me the tape.
I'll give you bucks! Tim!