09x21 - On the Edge

[bunniefuu]

♪ You take the good
you take the bad ♪

♪ You take 'em both
and there you have ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ There's a time you
gotta go and show ♪

♪ You're growin'
now you know about ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ When the world never seems ♪

♪ To be livin' up
to your dreams ♪

♪ And suddenly
you're findin' out ♪

♪ The facts of life
are all about you ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ It takes a lot
to get 'em right ♪

♪ When you're learnin'
the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

Morning. Good morning.

What's that smell?

Breakfast.

What are you doing
up early on a saturday?

I wanted to get up and at 'em.

Did you know that people spend
one-third of their lives in bed,

A little less if
they're married.

What's that smell?

Breakfast. I was afraid of that.

Sit down, it's all ready.

Don't have time.

I'm working the classifieds
section of the newspaper today.

Oh! What will you be doing?

I can't tell you...
It's classified.

Oh, just a little
newspaper humor.

The smallest amount
allowed by law.

Look at this, she gets married,
all of a sudden she's a grump.

Yeah, well I've got
to get going too,

Sandy's wants
me to sit in on her

Neighborhood
counseling group today.

That's nice, you always
learn a lot from sandy.

Would you like to take
her some breakfast?

I can't beverly
ann. She's my friend.

Ooh, what's that smell?

Breakfast.

Here. Sit. Eat.

Can't. Rehearsal. Bye.

I made a lot of food here.

Couldn't you just eat and run?

Beverly ann if I ate that,

I wouldn't be able to run.

Ooh, what smells so good?

Breakfast.

I'm so hungry, I could
eat every last morsel

All by my little lonesome.

Beverly ann made it.

Ooh! Is that the right time?

Pooh, I'm late.

Tootie, I'll sneak out...
Walk out with you.

What will I do
with all this food?

Oh, ready for breakfast?

It's your lucky day, I
saved some oatmeal for you.

Sorry, but we're on
our way to the mall.

I saw these unreal
pair of boots.

And I'm psyched up
enough to get 'em.

And I'm getting my
ear pierced. Bye.

Freeze!

What did you say?

I said I saw these
unreal pair of boots...

Not you. The american.

Mom, before telling me I
can't get my ear pierced,

I think it only fair

That you listen to my
side of the argument.

Alright, go ahead.

Please, please, please, please.

Out of the question.

But bev, the place at
the mall has a special...

Ears pierced while you wait.

All the guys are
getting it done.

I don't want to be
the only guy who isn't.

Andy, I adopted you

Because I want to
share my life with you,

Not my earrings.

Come on, mom.

I forbid you from
having your ear pierced

At the mall, you understand?

Yes, ma'am.

Do you still want to come
with me to get my boots?

Would you want to be seen on
the streets with a social outcast?

Sure. I never minded before.

Ok, sandy, I'll try it again.

Good. Does anybody
else have a problem?

You want to talk about.

Again? What is it this time?

Mrs. Beanes, what's
your problem?

I'm trying to find somebody
for roger to go out with.

Roger? Your son?

My schnauzer.

I'd take him out myself,

But he walks better than I do.

Ok, who can help mrs.
Beanes? Who lives near you?

Melissa, you don't
live far, do you?

Earth to melissa.
Earth to melissa.

There is contact. Go
ahead, mission control.

Melissa, would you mind

Walking mrs. Beanes'
dog once in a while?

Is that a yes?

Is this a no?

Is this a new kind of dance?

What?

What about you, annie?

Well, if I really wanted to,

I could probably make a
little time before school.

You offering?

You asking?

You're offering,
and you're accepting.

That's it for today.

Lets see everybody
back next week.

Well, another
great session, sandy.

Then how come I got a problem?

You? I thought social
workers solved problems.

Not this time. I need
a hand with melissa.

And do what?

She's either depressed or angry,

Or she just sits
there like a zombie.

She's had some
emotional problems.

Every time I think I'm
getting closer to her,

She just pulls farther away.

I think maybe spending some time

With somebody closer
to her age would help.

I'll do my best.

Thanks.

Hi.

Uh... Listen,

Are you doing anything tonight?

I was just thinking of you
know, going to funland,

Acting like a kid again...

Riding the roller coaster,

Spending 10 bucks
to win a $2 doll,

That sort of thing.

You want to come?

Why me?

I thought, well, you
look like someone

Who knows her way
around cotton candy.

How about it?

Are you going, too?

Uh, sure. I wouldn't
mind being a kid again.

How about it?

Why not? Nothing better to do.

You did it. You did it.
You broke through.

So we're going to
an amusement park?

Yeah, and a good time
will be had by none.

Hi. Hi.

What are you doing?

Piercing my ear.

Oh... But bev said
you couldn't do it.

No, no, no. She
said, and I quote,

"I forbid you from
having your ear pierced

At the mall."

Why, you sneaky little yank.

Thank you.

Well, here goes.

Hi, guys.

What are you doing?

Brain surgery.

Andy, you can get
your ear infected.

Don't worry. He's got two.

You should have
done that at the mall.

That's what I keep
telling beverly ann,

But she won't listen to reason.

Hi, there.

Hi, bev.

Come on, pippa. Let's go.

He's mad at me, coz I
won't let him pierce his ear.

Why won't you?

I'll not have someone his age

Turn himself into
a human pin cushion.

We all do some things

That others might
think a bit strange,

Don't we, beverly ann?

Why do I have a feeling

You want to tell me
something I don't want to hear?

Remember last summer when
we went to that pool party,

We put on our bathing
suits and our cabana?

I'll never forget that.

That was the day
blair got her hair wet.

Well, while we were changing

I noticed you had a
strange little mark

Near the top of your, um...

On the back of your front.

But it wasn't just a mark.

It was a name.

A name?

Mo.

M-0. Admit it, beverly ann,

You have a tattoo
on your... Back there.

Natalie...

I wasn't always

The person you
see before you now.

There was a time in my youth

When I was a little flaky.

Really?

Mary jane roslavsky and I
went to the tattoo parlor

On a dare with some boys.

One of whom was named mo.

Uh-uh.

One was named gunther, though.

I remember saying to myself,

"Who'd want to
name a kid gunther?"

Then who is mo?

There was no mo.

The tattoo was
supposed to say "mom."

That was all I could think of.

The first two
letters hurt so much,

I ran out before
it was finished.

But it didn't k*ll you. Did it?

No. I guess it was just
part of being young.

That's your point
about andy isn't it?

Pretty much, although you
took longer to get there

Than I would have.

It could have been worse.

Somewhere in the world,

Mary jane roslavsky's
walking around

With a great, big
"gunther" on her butt.

Come on in. Thanks.

This is so great.

I never won anything
before in my life.

I can't believe you knocked
down all those milk bottles

With one throw.

I tried to hit him with
a bowling ball one time

And they didn't go down.

Just close my eyes, wound up

And threw as hard as I could.

Well, whatever you did,
it was pretty impressive,

Don't you think?

Yeah, it was great.

Neat house!

Where can I get
a drink of water?

Right through there.

You know, I had fun tonight.

I was trying to remember
the last time I had fun,

And, um... Well, thanks a lot.

She's a different person.

She hasn't stopped
talking all night.

I guess, she just needed someone

To include her in stuff.

I don't like it one bit.

Sandy, I don't get you.

You want melissa to be happy.

Now she is, and you're not.

I don't understand.

I just have this awful feeling

That melissa's elation

Is a symptom of the
manic depressive...

Wild mood swings
that go back and forth

Back and forth,
until it... Until what?

Any number of things,
none of them good.

I just met a strange lady

Who offered to
defrost me some oatmeal.

That's beverly
ann. She's harmless

As long as we pretend
nothing's wrong with her.

Oh.

Just like me, right?

No, I wasn't talking about you.

I was just making a joke.

I know you talk about me
when I'm not in the room.

What's the problem?
Everything's fine.

Oh sure. That's what
they tell laboratory mice

When they prod
them and poke them

And watch to see
what they'll do next.

Alright, melissa, calm down.

I don't want to calm down!

I hate being treated like that,

And I hate you
for doing it to me.

Thanks for nothing.

Wait a minute.
Where are you going?

What do you care, really?

We should go after her.

No! Jo! When they're like this,

The more you chase
them, the greater the risk.

What does that mean?

Is she dangerous or something?

Only to herself.

Yeah, I'll accept
a collect call.

Rick!

You gonna have to speak up.

This connection's terrible.

I miss you, too.

Rick, I'm at work.

All right.

My blue sweater, my black jeans.

Rick, my doctor
doesn't even know that.

Help! Somebody, help!

Ah look, I've got an emergency.

I have to go. I love you. Bye.

Somebody's on top of
the building next door!

She's going to jump!

Alright, take it
easy, mr. White.

The office building?

Yes. She's standing
on the ledge.

I've seen her here before.

Melissa.

Oh, god.

Have you seen melissa?

She's probably off daydreaming.

Will you shut up.
Have you seen her?

No! She never came
to school today.

Oh god! Mr. White,
call the police.

Melissa! Melissa!

Excuse me, let me through.

Sandy?

Stay away from
me, jo, or I'm gone.

I don't understand this.

I expected to find
melissa out here.

Oh, melissa... Melissa's gone.

Her stepmother
called me this morning.

Melissa ran away in
the middle of the night.

She won't be back.

You don't know that.

She took some food
and all her clothes.

Oh. Well, uh...

Ok, well maybe she was, um...

Going on a moonlight picnic,

And on the way back

She wanted to be
the first one in line

At the dry cleaners.

I sometimes do that myself.

Don't play with me,
jo, this isn't a game.

Alright, don't come
in, I'll come out.

Fine. Fine? Uh... Ok, fine.

Um, you know...

I didn't bring a
sweater with me.

It's chilly out there.

It's cold and flu
season, you know.

Why don't you come in?

Look, maybe melissa is gone,

But is that any reason for
you to be out here on a ledge?

I mean, this is not something

You should just jump into.

Forget that part.

This isn't just
about melissa, jo.

This is about 10 years
worth of melissas.

They run away from home,
and we find them dead...

If we find them at all.

I just can't take
losing another one.

I just can't take it.

So find another job.

Too late, jo.

No, it's not too late,

If you just stop being
stupid and get in here.

When you're counseling
suicidal people,

Never be hostile.

That's beginner
lesson number two.

I'm sorry.

What's lesson number one?

Make them pay in advance.

Sandy, come on.

You've been out
there long enough.

You're right. I have.

Ok, everybody out.

Everybody out.
Come on. Move. Move.

Officer, thank god you're here.

Tell me you have somebody
who talks people down,

In situations like this.

We do... Sandy.

She is the head of our
su1c1de prevention team.

Hi, bill.

Why don't you let me
handle it from here.

No.

She stays, you go.

Nothing personal, bill.

Sandy, you know I'm not
leaving you out here like this.

Oh, yes, you are.

Because the jumper's
in charge, right?

That's what you always told me.

Sandy's the best.

Bye.

Bye? Uh...

I'm gonna be right
back. Don't go anywhere.

Aren't you gonna do anything?

Like what?

I don't know... Police stuff.

Well, I could sh**t her.

Look, miss, I got
to find somebody

Who knows how to
talk her back inside.

That may take some time.

So you got to keep her
up here any way you can.

Any suggestions?

Yeah.

Convince her that
things will get better.

How?

That's the hard part.

That's always the hard part.

What are you doing?

I have to be able to jump out

So I don't hit the
building, on the way down.

That would hurt.

What are you doing?

Showing you that
I care about you

In the stupidest way possible.

Ok.

Well, now.

It's not so bad now, is it?

A little high.

Do you realize that

You really can't
see life objectively

Until you confront death?

You know, I was watching a rerun

Of the three
stooges the other day

The one where shemp and larry
are in the fireworks factory.

I'm talking eternity,
and you're talking shemp?

I'm sorry. I've never
done this before.

Oh, in this line of work,

You have to be
perfect the first time.

Then you improve after that.

Jo.

Nat! What are you doing here?

I'm covering this for the paper.

Get out of here.

Come on, you're gonna
make sandy nervous.

Can I quote you on that?

No, you can't quote me on that.

Can I ask her a few questions?

Or maybe now's not
a really good time.

Would you haul
your pad out of here.

Is there anything
I can do to help?

That depends.

Can you fly?

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Look.

Melissa is the one
that started all this.

Maybe if she were
here, she could finish it.

Well, then I'll go get melissa.

Where is melissa?
Who is melissa?

What am I talking about here?

Brown hair, 17.

And she's right here in
the state of new york.

That oughta narrow it down.

Look, she has this
jacket she wears

With a lightning
bolt on the back.

I've got an idea, try funland.

She seemed to like
the roller coaster.

I like the bumper cars.

Could I try finding her there?

Just go!

Ok.

Stop! You'll hurt yourself!

Hello miss warner.

What's going on? This
place is a madhouse.

I know.

I'm trying to teach
the younger children

How to play checkers
to keep them quiet.

That's nice. How's it going?

Great. I'm ahead 12 bucks.

Where is jo?

On the ledge next door.

A su1c1de attempt,
the police said.

What? Are you sure?

Well, the word is,

That she and sandy
have been up there

Talking for an awful long time.

I've got to get right up there.

Mrs. Beans, you're in
charge until I get back.

Ha ha ha! Oh...

And then in sixth grade,
I had mrs. Wilkenson.

She wore a wig.

She didn't think
anybody knew it.

But we did.

Everybody knew. Dogs knew it.

You're stalling, jo.

Good technique.

Jo, don't do it!

Jo, I know we kid around a lot,

And maybe sometimes
it's been too much,

But I want you to know

That whatever it is
that's got you down,

I will do everything within my
power to help you through it.

Jo, a lot of people love you,

And I'm one of them.

Blair, the only way
I'm going off this ledge

Is if your hot air
causes a wind shear

And knocks me off.

I'm not going to jump.

It worked! I did it!

Sandy is the one
who wants to jump.

I'm trying to stop her.

Oh.

Look, would you just
get back to the center

Before the kids
have a garage sale

And sell all the furniture.

All right.

Sandy, listen to jo.

And remember, dead
people can't shop.

Ok, let's see. Where was i?

Oh, seventh grade.

What are you thinkin' about?

Kenny sweeney.

Kid I counseled for a while.

Smart, funny.

Run away?

No. Just a regular kid

With a lot on his mind.

One day he told me,
he wanted to be a pilot

So he could fly big jets

And look down on
top of everything.

He went home and got his
father's p*stol, and blew...

I heard later that he
had taken off his shirt

And put it in the closet,

So it wouldn't get...

Sandy, don't do
this to yourself.

There must be some other
way you can deal with this.

Oh, listen to you.
What do you know?

You organize
ping-pong tournaments

In a day care center!

Who the hell are you to tell me
what I can and cannot deal with?

No one should have to live with
something like kenny sweeney!

And I have done long enough.

Jo, I found melissa!

She didn't want to come with me.

I promised a ride
in blair's lear jet.

Blair doesn't have a lear jet.

I know,

But her birthday's
coming up, so...

Melissa, are you all right?

Sure. I'm ok.

I'm so glad they found you.

Now please get away from here.

This is no place for you to be.

Sandy, she needs you.

Tell her.

Hey if she wants
to jump, let her.

Life stinks, anyway.

Get her out of here!

She's got a lot of problems.

Why don't you just
get out of here

And let me do what I have to do.

All right.

And what happens to me?

You go on with your life.

Oh, what, that old thing?

Oh, jo, I'm sorry about
the daycare cr*ck.

None of this is directed at you.

See, the thing is, you're right.

I'm not trained to run a center.

That's why I was going
to go back to school

And become a
licensed social worker.

Oh, and you should. Do it.

Nah, I don't think so.

Not if listening to
people's problems

Is going to make
me want to do this.

Oh jo, don't let me change
your mind about social work.

For every one you don't reach,

There are 10, 20 or
a 100 that you do.

You just can't give up.

You mean, like you're doing.

I know I'm supposed to
separate myself from my work,

But I just can't do it.

I don't want to
lose any of them, jo.

Why does it have to happen?

I don't know.

I guess, all you can do
is save the ones you can.

People have to
save themselves, jo.

That's right. They do.

Hey!

Don't leave me out here.

It's cold and flu season.

And then, paying absolutely
no attention to my own safety,

I talked sandy in.

It was the "dead people
can't shop" that did it.

Hey, guys, check it out.

Hey, andy, you've
got an earring.

Yeah, I know.

You approved of this?

Approved of it,
chauffeured him to it,

And paid for it.

Why do all this?

Does he have certain
pictures of you or something?

Don't be ridiculous.

Those pictures are locked away.

I just figured,
hey, it's his life.

It's his ear.

Good thinking... Mo.

Jo, you're quite a hero.

Everybody down at the
mall was talking about it.

We should do
something to celebrate.

Oh, good idea.
We'll have a party.

Of course, we'll keep it small.

We'll invite all your friends.

What happened to
all that love stuff.

You sure seemed
worried when you thought

It was me going off that ledge.

Of course I was worried.

I gave you an advance
on your salary.