04x19 - B.M.O.C.

[bunniefuu]

♪ Now, the world don't move ♪

♪ To the b*at of just one drum ♪

♪ What might be right for you ♪

♪ May not be right for some ♪

♪ A man is born ♪

♪ He's a man of means ♪

♪ Then along come two ♪

♪ They got nothin'
but their jeans ♪

♪ But they got
diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ To move the world ♪

♪ Everybody's got ♪

♪ A special kind of story ♪

♪ Everybody finds
a way to shine ♪

♪ It don't matter that you got ♪

♪ Not a lot, so what? ♪

♪ They'll have theirs,
and you'll have yours ♪

♪ And I'll have mine ♪

♪ And together we'll be fine ♪

♪ 'Cause it takes
diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ To move the
world, yes, it does ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent
strokes to move the world ♪

I tell you, coach,

I really earned
this ice cream today.

Did you see the
way I stopped robbie

From stealing third base?

Arnold, that's ok
for a practice game,

But in a real ball game,

You're not allowed to
bite the base runner's ankle.

You are if he puts his
ankle in your mouth.

So how about it?

Do I get to play
second base or not?

Come on, coach.
There are four bases.

I'm only asking for one.

Hey, billy.

Willis.

Arnold, I told you

I haven't picked the
starting lineup yet.

Our first game is saturday.

Now, if I'm going to play,
I got to know right now.

Come on, yes or no.

Ok.

No.

Let me put it another way.

Please let me play.

Please, willis, please. Please.

Arnold, will you get up?
Somebody might step on you.

Man, I'd make a great shortstop.

Who else is shorter than me?

I'll think about it, arnold.

I got other things on my mind.

I'm in that letterman's club.

What's that?

The biggest jocks in school.

Most are juniors and seniors.

I'm getting into their
club as a freshman.

I'm gonna be a bmoc.

Bmoc?

The biggest mouth on campus?

Big man on campus, wise guy.

I know.

That's great.

You never told us
you got in that club.

Oh, yeah. I'm in, all right.

Except for one
little technicality.

They haven't asked
me to join yet.

Oh, is that all?

They'll be voting me in at
the party saturday night.

Let's face it. I'm the hottest
new freshman around.

In junior high, I set
all those records...

In track, baseball, basketball.

Yeah, and you're too
modest to talk about it.

So can I play or not?

All right.

I'll let you in the game.

Good!

Wait.

Are you letting me
play because I'm good,

Or 'cause I'm your brother?

'Cause you're my brother.

I can live with that.

Hey, arnold.

Here's some of the
guys from the club.

- Hey, guys!
- Hey.

- Join me.
- Be right there.

Don't do anything stupid.

Like what?

Like open your mouth.

How am I supposed to eat?

You know what I mean.

And don't say anything about
me coaching your sandlot team.

Why not?

I'm in high school.

They'll think I hang out
with a bunch of little kids.

Watch what you say or else.

Understand?

I got it.

Thanks for helping me, sweetie.

You know, adelaide, it
was very nice for you

To make a special
baseball dinner for arnold.

Well, he was so excited
about his first game.

I just hope it's
a victory dinner.

Gee, I didn't realize
you were into baseball.

Well, I haven't always been.

You know, I was
raised on a farm,

And when I was a kid,

I thought a
one-bagger was a cow.

Mmm. Something
smells good. [Sniffs]

Makes you appreciate
having a big nose.

It's frankfurters.

I made 'em just like they
do at the baseball park.

You mean cold and undercooked?

Don't forget the soggy buns.

Kimberly: hi, arnold.

Adelaide: hi, honey.

Well, how'd the game go, son?

To nothin'.

Guess who got the nothin'.

Well, at least you didn't
bruise your new bats.

Aw, arnold, that's too
bad. And your first game.

Honey, look on the bright side.

So far, this season, that's
the only game you've lost.

I wouldn't have
bought it, either.

Well, willis must be terribly
disappointed, too, huh?

He doesn't know about it.

Your coach doesn't
know you lost?

Our coach never showed up.

What?

That's why we did so bad.

There was nobody in charge.

Our pitcher walked
in the first runs.

Well, why didn't
they replace him?

Because he's the
biggest guy on the team,

And we didn't want to lose
the game and our teeth.

I wonder why
willis wasn't there.

Gee, I hope nothing
happened to him.

Well, if it didn't,
it's going to.

Easy, arnold, easy.

I'm sure he had a
very good reason.

Oh, here you guys are.

Well, see ya later.

Wait a minute. Willis...

Where were you this afternoon?

I was out gettin' this jacket.

A jacket?

Yeah, you know...

Sleeves, pockets,
buttons down the front.

I'd like to button
down your front.

Hey, what's going on?
Did I miss something?

Well, for openers, what
about arnold's baseball game?

Oh, no, your game.

Hey, arnold, I'm sorry.
I forgot all about it.

Well, how'd we do?

We lost by runs.

I think it was more, but the
scorekeeper ran out of chalk.

Willis, how could you
forget? You're the coach!

And you know how much
that game meant to arnold.

I didn't do it on purpose, dad.

I just had other
things on my mind.

What mind?

That was really pretty
thoughtless of you, willis.

Ok. I said I'm sorry.

What more do you want me to do?

Why don't you try
hang-gliding without a glider?

Look, I was getting ready

For the lettermen's club party.

I mean, it's important to me.

That's why I was out
buying this jacket.

They've voting me in tonight.

Now, dad, I've gotta look good.

By the way, where did you get
the money to buy the jacket?

Oh, it didn't cost me anything.

I charged it to you.

I see. You buy now, I pay later.

Oh, gee! How thoughtful of
you to think of daddy, willis.

He's just paying dad
back. Dad adopted him,

And he adopted
dad's charge account.

Willis, I didn't give you
permission to do that.

Oh, but you would've said
yes if I asked you first anyway.

Well, I gotta get changed.

Well, don't take too long.
Adelaide made a special dinner.

Oh, listen, I won't be
eating home tonight.

Some of the seniors
from the lettermen's club

Are gonna catch a
burger before the party,

So I thought I'd join 'em.

Wait a minute.

You might've let us know.
Why didn't you call and tell us?

Dad, there you go again,
treating me like I'm a kid.

Willis, that has
nothing to do with it.

Dad calls when he's not
coming home for dinner,

And he's not a kid.

Dad hasn't been a kid
for a long, long time.

Look, dad, I'm not gonna check
in every time I make a move.

I'm not on parole.

Look at him. He
thinks he's a big sh*t

'Cause he's in high school now.

I'm afraid willis is
having growing pains.

Yeah, and he's growing
into a bigger pain every day.

Hey, arnold, give me
a hand. Why should i?

Because they're your toys,
and I'm getting rid of them.

Getting rid of 'em?! Why?!

Arnold, you can't
keep them here.

You know, I was thinking of
inviting some of the guys over

After the lettermen's
club meeting.

What are they gonna
do, sit on the shelves?

Arnold, will you take a
look around this room?

Now, what do you see?

Is this one of those
trick questions?

Look, this is a
little kid's room.

Man, it's embarrassing with
all your baby stuff around.

Baby stuff?! This
ain't baby stuff!

Get your hands off
fuzzy-wuzzy moo-moo!

Now, these are my toys. Don't I
have anything to say about 'em?

Sure. You can say which part
of the basement I put them in.

Well, if that's
the way you feel,

Then I'm going, too.

Me and fuzzy-wuzzy know
when we're not wanted.

Don't we, fuzzy?

Arnold, what are you doing?

Willis is kicking me out!
I'm being repossessed.

Hey, willis, what's going on?

Dad, I need my own space.

Arnold's stuff is everywhere.

My stuff?!

Dad, you should see our closet.

He's got more clothes
than the jackson .

Well, I need a lot of
clothes. I'm in high school now.

Where are you going,
calvin klein high?

Look, willis, we've been
through this before.

I know you'd like to
have a room of your own,

But we just don't
have the space.

You may be growing bigger,
but the apartment isn't,

And we're not about to move.

Well, why can't I
take adelaide's room?

She can move up
here with arnold.

No way! She'd see
me in my underwear.

Or worse, I'd see her in hers!

Dad, take a look
around this room.

This doesn't look like a
room a teenager lives in.

Well, throw some of
your clothes on the floor

And spread a little food around.

Next thing you know, he'll be
asking me to move my goldfish.

Now why would
he want to do that?

Because abraham's
only a year old.

He's a kid fish.

Arnold, that's dumb.

Admit it. You never
liked abraham.

And I'll tell you something.
He never liked you!

Arnold, how can you tell
whether a fish likes someone or not?

I can tell. Every time you walk
into the room, he blows bubbles.

That's the way a
fish says, "phhht!"

Now, willis, you're
going to stay in this room.

Nobody's gonna move anywhere,

And you're gonna have to be

A little more tolerant
of your brother.

And you better show up

When you have to
coach us from now on.

Oh, that won't be
a problem anymore.

Ah, good.

As of right now, I'm not
your coach anymore.

I quit!

What you talking about, willis?

When you agreed
to coach that team,

You made a commitment.

Yeah, well, now I'm unmaking it.

You know, dad, I'm sick and
tired of being his baby-sitter.

Sometimes I wish I
didn't have a brother.

Arnold, he didn't
mean that, really.

Yes, he did.

Oh, come on, arnold.

It's not that bad.

Yes, it is.

The guys on the team
are gonna k*ll me,

My brother hates me,

And I've lost the will to live.

Other than that,
everything's fine.

Look, willis is just
going through a phase

That teenagers go through.

Why can't he be like
every other teenager

And just get pimples?

Hey, I know what'll
make you feel great.

Why don't we go and see a
good horror movie tonight?

You know that new one,

About an alien that
comes from another galaxy

And buys a shopping mall.

I saw that twice.

Well, maybe we could find

A good old-fashioned
cowboy picture.

You know, where the
good guy wears a white hat,

The bad guy wears a black hat,

And at the end, the
hero kisses his horse.

And then goes to washington
and becomes president.

Thanks, but I'm not in
the mood for a movie.

Well, what are you gonna
do? Sit here and sulk all night?

No. Just till I cry
myself to sleep.

Boy, the club's really
gonna be fat this year.

Right. We got a lot of
good guys to choose from.

Hey, brothers, what's happening?

Hey, I heard you guys
say you were gonna

Come down here and
eat before the party,

So I thought I'd join you.

Why don't you sit down?

Hey, say, is this all
you fellas are eating?

Well, order something
else. It's on me.

Hey, man, my old man's loaded.

Check out these new threads he
bought me for the party tonight.

What are you guys gonna wear?

What do you mean?

I mean aren't you
gonna get dressed up?

We are dressed up.

Oh.

Well, I just meant
aren't you gonna

Put on something a little nicer.

Like what you're wearing?

Right.

Look, we were just
talking about which guys

To vote into the club,
so if you don't mind...

Oh, I don't mind.

Am I the only letterman
coming in from junior high?

Hey, hear that?
He's a letterman.

Yeah, and the
letters are j-e-r-k.

Don't say that.

We've got a real celebrity here.

Maybe he'll invite us over
sometime to see his trophies.

I guess I have been
talking a lot about myself.

Well, what about you guys?

Hey, you like my new jacket?

It's nice. It's not
as loud as you are.

Come on, guys.
Let's get out of here.

Hey, fellas, you guys are not
mad at me or anything, are you?

We have a party to go to.

Oh, so do i. We're
all in the same club.

Jackson, do you know what
happens if a guy gets no votes?

Oh, yeah. He can't get
into the lettermen's club,

But that's not gonna
happen to me, right?

Right. You're
getting no votes.

?

, , .

Ha ha ha! Ha ha
ha. You're kidding.

Jackson, you're
just a little too big

For our little club.

You better make other
plans for tonight.

Go to a movie with
someone you love.

Go alone.

Oh, come on, guys.
Give me another chance.

I know I may have
sounded kind of conceited,

But I'm really not like that.

I'm really a great guy!

Here's your check.

Give it to him. He's
really a great guy.

I hope you're a big tipper.

[Slurping]

Hey, waiter, bring
me another one,

And make it a double.

Don't you think
is enough, kid?

Ah, come on. One
more for the road.

Ok, but all that sugar's
gonna rot your teeth.

Oh, who needs teeth?

I'm never gonna smile again.

Oh, come on. Snap out of it.

So what if some guys
don't want you in their club?

There's worse things than that.

Like what?

Like being a waiter.

I'm never gonna get in
that letterman's club now.

Boy, I really blew it.

Ah, don't be so
hard on yourself.

It could happen to
anybody with a big mouth.

Thanks.

Uh, well, you know what I mean.

Look, why don't you just
go home and sleep it off?

I can't go home yet.

My family thinks I'm at
the letterman's party

Getting voted in.

I'll be right back.

I just got to go
to the rest room.

I'm not surprised.

Now aren't you glad we
talked you into going, arnold?

Wasn't that a good movie?

Yeah, I guess so.

Oh, come on, cheer
up. Before you know it,

You and your brother'll
be best friends again,

And he'll be back
coaching the team.

Yeah, by that
time, I'll be so old

I'll have to use
my cane for a bat.

Hi, folks. What would you like?

Well, I'd like a
king-size banana split,

But I'm watching my figure,

So I'll just have a
scoop of vanilla, please.

Same for me. Arnold,
how about you?

I'm really not very hungry,

So give me a scoop of vanilla

Surrounded by other scoops

And drown it in chocolate
syrup and whipped cream,

And if you happen
to see a banana

Just split it and
slam-dunk it in the middle.

What would you like for dessert?

Ok, got it. Thank you.

Hey, wasn't that a
great movie, arnold?

That was really a good comedy,

One of the funniest
I've ever seen.

That wasn't a comedy.

Oh. Then, it was
a lousy picture.

Well, it was a funny cartoon.

[Chuckles] yeah.

No, it wasn't.

Now, arnold, don't
tell me you didn't laugh

When the woodpecker
carved his initials

On the baboon's behind?

Now, that was high comedy.

I may have been
laughing on the outside,

But on the inside, my
little heart was breaking.

Oh, arnold. Come
on now. Stop that.

You know in no time at all,

You and willis are
gonna be friends again.

No, we won't.

It's a terrible thing when
your brother hates you.

I'm never gonna say
willis' name again.

Hey, look. There he is.

Who?

What's his name.

I thought willis was
supposed to be at that party.

Why don't we go say hi?

Wait a minute. Uh...

Maybe we'd better not.

Waiter? Yes, sir?

Could you tell us how long
that young fellow over there

Has been here?

A couple of hours.

He's already had malts,

And he just ordered another one.

What's his problem?

Oh, he didn't seem to
make it into some club,

And he's too ashamed to go home,

So he's been sitting here
drowning his sorrows in malts.

Oh. Well, thanks.

Aw, poor willis.

How could they turn down a guy

As great as willis thinks he is?

Well, what are we gonna do, dad?

Well, we don't want to
embarrass him, do we?

I think maybe we should
just get out of here

Before he sees us.

You mean before we...

[Muffled] eat?

Your order will be right up.

Listen, I'm sorry,
but I'm afraid

We're gonna have
to cancel that order.

Here, thanks very
much for your trouble.

Thank you!

I hope I get the chance
not to serve you again.

Ok, troops, let's move it out.

[Clanks]

Coast is clear.

Ok, let's get out of here.

Poor willis, I know
just how he feels.

I remember when I
was a young girl.

Boy, what a memory.

I remember how disappointed
I was when I got turned down

By a group I was trying
so hard to get into,

The y.m.c.a.

Adelaide, that's just for men.

I know. That's
why I kept trying.

Well, if there's nothing more,

I guess I'll go to bed.

Just leave the dishes.
I'll do 'em in my dreams.

Good night, adelaide.

Good night!

Now, listen, you two.

When willis does come
home, let's not let on

That we saw him at all, ok?

Philip: ok?

Gee, I wonder why he
didn't get into that club?

They probably
couldn't get his head

Through the front door.

Hey, I think I just
heard him come in.

Willis?!

Willis: yeah, dad.

We're in here!

Oh, hi, everybody.

Arnold: hey, willis.

Man, what a night.

Those guys really know
how to throw a party.

Oh, super. Great.

It was a night
I'll never forget.

I'll bet.

I'm home a little early
because of the b*mb scare.

b*mb scare?

Yeah, a couple of
the guys got bombed,

And somebody got
scared and called the cops.

[Laughing together]

Well, I'm glad you
had a good time, son.

Join us.

No, thanks, dad.

I'm too tired from
having so much fun.

Well, good night.

Good night,
willis. Night, willis.

Hey, arnold...

Mm-hmm?

If you want me to still
coach your baseball team,

I'll be glad to.

We sure do.

We'll tell billy
martin to forget it.

Well, good night, you guys.

Good night. Good night, willis.

There's something
else I have to tell you.

I didn't go to that
party tonight,

And I didn't get in
that club, either.

I don't know if you
guys have noticed,

But lately I've been
acting like a big sh*t.

Oh, no! I didn't notice.

I did.

They turned me down because
I was sh**ting off my mouth

Like a total fool.

You know, I sat in
hamburger heaven all night.

I must have had or malts.

.

Yeah, . And i...

Hey, arnold, how'd
you know it was ?

Um... I can see the future.

I'm one of those seer suckers.

Were you guys at
hamburger heaven tonight?

As a matter of
fact, willis, we were.

We stopped in after the movie.

But how come I didn't see you?

Well, we were wearing menus.

We talked to the waiter,

And he told us what happened.

We didn't want to embarrass
you, so we snuck out.

You guys did that for me?

And I sat there all night

Thinking you guys
wouldn't understand,

Thinking you wouldn't
want to talk to me

For the way I acted.

Listen, son,

When you love somebody,
you forgive a lot of things.

Right, arnold? Right.

But don't press your luck.

Listen, I apologize for the way

I treated all you guys.

And don't worry
about this jacket, dad.

I'm gonna take it back

And charge a cheaper one to you.

Ha!

Hey, arnold, why don't
we go to our room,

And I'll help you put the
toys back on our shelf?

Sorry, willis. I
can't let you do that.

Why not?

'Cause I already did it myself.

♪ Now, the world don't move ♪

♪ To the b*at of just one drum ♪

♪ What might be right for you ♪

♪ May not be right for some ♪

♪ A man is born ♪

♪ He's a man of means ♪

♪ Then along come two ♪

♪ They got nothin'
but their jeans ♪

♪ But they got
diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent strokes ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent
strokes to move the world ♪

♪ Yes, it does ♪

♪ It takes diff'rent
strokes to move the world ♪