05x17 - A Tale of Two Cities: Part 1

[bunniefuu]

Johnny mathis: ♪ I bet
we've been together ♪

♪ For a million years ♪

Deniece williams: ♪ and I
bet we'll be together ♪

♪ For a million more ♪

♪ Oh, it's like I
started breathing ♪

♪ On the night we kissed ♪

Both: ♪ and I can't remember ♪

♪ What I ever did before ♪

♪ What would we do, baby ♪

♪ Without us? ♪

♪ What would we do, baby ♪

♪ Without us? ♪

♪ And there ain't no nothing ♪

♪ We can't love
each other through ♪

♪ What would we do, baby ♪

♪ Without us? ♪

♪ Sha la la la ♪

Hey! How was the
home design show?

You should have come with
us, alex. It was fabulous.

Alex, miles and miles
of new appliances,

Wall coverings,
bathroom fixtures.

If only I could live
this day over again

And have gone with you.

We're going again tomorrow.

Yeah. We're trying to decide

Whether or not to
remodel the kitchen.

What... No way!

You'll have to remodel me first.

Sounds like another
argument in favor.

Listen, you guys mind removing
all this home show stuff?

I mean, I've got a lot of
important banking papers here.

These are just travel
brochures of chicago, alex.

Alex, if you're leaving home,

Please go further than chicago.

For your information, mal,
chicago happens to be the host city

For the th annual
midwest banking seminar,

Which I will be attending.

Jealous, huh?

Just have to watch
it on television

Like everybody else.

I didn't know you
were going, alex.

Yeah. I'm going to be representing
harding trust, my bank.

They asked you to go?

We should take our money
out of there immediately.

Well, we already did
when alex got the job.

I'm telling you, mommy.

This banking conference
is going to be great.

All of the best banking
minds in the midwest

Are going to be there.

Well, it was quite an honor
for them to choose you.

Yeah, well, they haven't...

Officially chosen me yet,

But rebecca's on
her way over here

And said she wanted to
talk to me about something,

So, you know, what
else could it be?

I'm the obvious choice.

Well, good. You and rebecca
are getting along better now?

Oh, yeah. We're
getting along fine now.

In fact, yesterday,

She only threatened
to fire me twice.

You're a shoo-in.

[Knock on door]

Oh, come in. Come
in. Come in. Come in.

Hi. Alex, I hope I'm
not disturbing you.

Oh, rebecca, no.
I mean, obviously,

You wouldn't come
over here and talk to me

Unless you had something
important to say.

Well, I have a few things
I'd like to discuss with you.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Alex, what are you doing
with a map of chicago?

Well, you know, I have
to tell you, rebecca,

Chicago has always been
a favorite city of mine.

Yeah, I've often dreamed

Of walking the windy streets,

Playing hog butcher
to the world.

I'm sorry. It's a
poor boy's dream.

I didn't mean to
burden you with it.

Good.

♪ My kind of town ♪

♪ Chicago is ♪

♪ My kind of town ♪

Alex, I think a theme is
starting to emerge here.

You want to go to the
conference in chicago, don't you?

You got to take me, rebecca.

Look, I already got
a new travel alarm.

It's already set
for chicago time.

Alex, let me be frank with you.

I have thought long and hard

About taking you
to this conference.

You are the sharpest, most
knowledgeable employee I have.

You are also the most
volatile, unpredictable,

Potentially lethal
employee I have.

Well, I know. That's
the fun side of me.

Not at a banking
conference, it's not.

Rebecca, look. You got to
take me to this conference.

It really means a lot to me.

I promise you... I promise you,

I will be professional
and business-like

The entire trip.

Well, remember that,

Because you're going.
Here's the ticket.

Yow!

♪ My kind of town ♪

Look at this, jen.

This is a beautiful
kitchen here.

We could do something like
that in here, don't you think?

Wouldn't it be great to
have everything brand-new?

Oh, yeah.

We've been talking
about it for so long.

This kitchen has been exactly
the same since I was born.

It's been the same
since i was born.

It's been the same
since i was born.

Well, your father doesn't
feel the same way about this.

He doesn't like
change of any kind.

I once bought a
different brand of napkins.

He developed a rash.

We could get him to do it, mom.

If we g*ng up on him,

He'll fold like a
house of cards.

Mallory and I can do
the loving daughter bit.

He loves that.

I don't want to trick your dad

Into doing something
he doesn't want to do.

Oh, mom, that's
the beauty of it.

You're going to
take middle ground.

You can pretend you're
reasonable about this.

You could say things like,

"Steven, we should
seriously consider

"Remodeling this kitchen.

But let's not be hasty."

And then kiss him quick.

And the final touch is when
we get alex to take dad's side.

Alex will say,
"remodel the kitchen?

"That's the worst
idea I ever heard.

Don't touch a thing."

Dad will be
remodeling in a second.

Oh, that's really appealing.

But even if your dad agreed
to remodel the kitchen,

We don't have the
money. It's that simple.

Hey, everybody, guess what?

I got a raise!

A raise! That's terrific!

Oh, man. Oh!

What do you think we
should do with the money?

Ohh! Ohh!

You're excited, huh?

What do you think we
should do with the money?

Well, I've thought about it.

And I think we should
put it right in the bank

And watch it grow.

I think that's a great idea.

I mean, what other
options do we have

With all that new money?

And either we
put it in the bank,

And we watch it grow,

Or we remodel the kitchen.

What? Remodel the kitchen?

Yeah! Yeah!

Never! I love this kitchen!

There's a lot of history here.

Daddy, we're so
glad you're home!

We love you!

And we're so proud of you.

So proud!

You're probably
the only daddy on

The whole block
who got a raise today.

I will never
remodel this kitchen.

Steven, maybe we should
seriously consider

Remodeling the kitchen.

But let's not be too hasty.

I will never
remodel this kitchen.

Ok. Well. Here I go.

Alex, what do you think
about remodeling the kitchen?

Remodel the kitchen?

That's the worst
idea I ever heard.

Don't touch a thing.

All right. I'll think about it.

Ok. Ok.

So, what time does
your flight leave, alex?

In about one hour, dad.

Rebecca's coming by
to pick me up any minute.

Well, I'm very
proud of you, alex.

Things really seem
to be going your way.

Especially, you know,
considering that rocky start

I had with rebecca.

You know, that little
error in judgment I made.

Little error?

Alex, you kissed your boss.

Yeah, I know. I know.

But it was late at night...

We were alone in the bank.

We each had a little
too much money to count.

Anyway, that's history, dad.

That's in the past.
That's forgotten.

Well, that's great. It's a
real sign of growth to see

How you've accepted
having a woman as boss.

Yeah. Thanks, dad. And,
you know, I like to think

That I have had some
effect on rebecca, too.

I'm sorry to hear that.

You know that kind of girl...

Wealthy, new england,
private school type.

You know, snobbish, aloof, cold.

Yeah. I guess she could
use some changing.

I'm trying to turn
her into that.

I mean, that's her background,

But besides all that
stuff, which I love,

You know, she's
a little uptight.

Got to loosen her up a little.

[Knock on door] ah,
well, there she is.

Hi, alex. Are you ready?
Plane leaves in an hour.

Ready as can be.

Well, we really appreciate

Your taking alex
along with you, rebecca.

We can really use the rest.

I'm glad to help, but I'm
really taking alex along

Because he's very
sharp and very eager,

And I'm afraid to leave
him alone at the bank.

Alex, I knew it was going
to be a mistake to take you.

Aw, come on. What mistake?

I thought it was a great flight.

What about that little scene
you caused with the stewardess?

What, are you trying
to tell me I wasn't right?

Alex, after a certain age,

They don't give you those
little wings anymore.

All right. Ok. It was a
little bit of a rough start.

You know, I was a
little bit excited,

But I know what's called
for here, rebecca...

Professionalism,
decorum, reserve.

Hey. Alex keaton, harding trust.

[Beep beep] where
you from, buddy?

Is that your wife? Whoo!

What?

Good afternoon.
How may I help you?

You have a reservation
for ryan, rebecca ryan.

That will be suite
in the west tower.

A porter will be along
shortly to take your bags.

Thank you.

[Rings]

[Rings]

[Honks]

Hey.

Good afternoon, sir.

Good afternoon. Good afternoon.

There should be a
suite waiting for me.

The name is keaton,
alex p. Keaton.

I'm with the banking conference.

Uh...

I'm afraid I have no
reservation for keaton.

Well, there must
be some mistake.

Just try again.

I'm sorry. We're
all booked up, sir.

There are no rooms available.

[Honks] next, please.

Look, could you at least

Recommend me to another hotel?

Every hotel in chicago is full.

Sir, there's a blizzard
starting up out there.

People aren't even
able to leave the city.

Excuse me.

Do you believe this?

They don't have my
reservation. I don't have a room.

Alex, I'm really sorry.

I got to go upstairs and shower.

Good luck.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

I don't need luck,

I need towels.

I need a soapdish.

I need mints on my pillow.

Look, alex, I'm
really very sorry.

I would love to help
you, but what can I do?

Well...

Don't even think about it!

Come on. You've got a suite!

You've got plenty of room.

Absolutely not. I cannot
have you sleeping in my r...

All right.

I'm an officer of the bank.

I have a reputation to uphold.

All right. Ok. Now, wait
a minute. Wait a minute.

What are you afraid of?

What, are you afraid
I'm going to peek?

What, are you afraid I'm
going to try something?

Come on, rebecca,
look. This is business.

Pure and simple.

I'm here representing
harding bank...

Your bank.

I got to be alert. I
got to get some rest.

There's nothing
personal about this.

Ok, alex. You win.

What other choice do I have?

You can share my suite with me.

Ok. Great.

We're going to
be living together.

[Horn blows]

It's going to be
great being roomies.

You'll see.

If you refer to us as
roomies one more time,

I'm going to fire you.

And then, I'm going
to b*at you up.

Come on. Look, rebecca.

I'm going to make this as
easy on you as possible.

I'm going to be
quiet as a mouse.

You'll hardly even
know I'm around.

If you want to have guys over,

You know, hang a
sock on the door.

Ok. This is you. Suite .

Corner suite. [Beeps]

I love it.

This is a suite?

This must be a sitting room.

This is just a
sitting room, right?

Oh, sure. You can sit in here.

But if you'll allow me
to squeeze through here,

I'll show you some
of the features

Of this room.

There are no
features in this room.

Thanks for pointing that out.

No problem.

I'll get the rest
of the luggage.

Alex.

Excuse me.

Need anything else?

Some, uh...

Some ice, perhaps?

Where would we put it?

Thanks.

All right. Ok.

We're in a bit of a
rough spot here.

It's a little awkward.

Could be worse.

We might not be in a suite.

Dad, what are you doing?

Just sitting here...

Thinking.

We've had some wonderful
times in this kitchen, haven't we?

Take it easy, honey.

We'll have some good
times in the new kitchen, too.

How can you be
sure of that, elyse?

What if this kitchen
is the reason

We've been so happy
for all these years?

Let's not forget
the other rooms, dad.

They've had
something to do with it.

Yeah. I've had some great
times in the living room.

Maybe the reason you had

Such great times
in the living room

Is because it's so
close to the kitchen.

Honey, honey. I know
this is difficult for you.

I know you have
ambivalent feelings

About changes in the kitchen,

But that's why I went out,

And I hired george bellack.

He's an excellent
interior designer.

He's going to come in,

He's going to consult,

And he's going to
go very, very slowly.

All right. All right, elyse.

I'm approaching this
with an open mind.

What are you doing?

I just want a little something

To remember the
kitchen by, that's all.

Mal, jen, can I have a sh*t of
you over by the refrigerator?

Mom, stop him.

What's the big deal?

Just a couple of sh*ts
for the ol' wallet.

Mal, take some ice cubes
out, honey. Come on... Action.

Good! Come on. Come on.

Oh! Oh! It's george bellack.

George, come in. Come in.

This is my husband steven.

Nice to meet you.

Our daughters
jennifer and mallory.

Girls.

We are thrilled that you're
going to be handling this, george.

Anything for you, elyse.

Well, take a look around.

Come on. Don't hold back.
Just what do you think?

Let's start with
the small things.

This wall must go.

What? I love this wall.

This is a historical wall.

We measured the kids'
growth on this wall.

Look, uh...

Mallory at ,

Jennifer at ...

Alex at .

Mr. Keaton, this wall is
what's preventing this kitchen

From springing to life,

From reaching its full
potential as a family center.

This wall is what's preventing
the house from falling down.

Steven, would you just
let george do his work?

Certainly, certainly.

If I may proceed.

I see a huge bay window!

With shelves

And greenery cascading down

And lace curtains

Framing a wonderful
panoramic view.

Oh, that sounds fabulous.

I've always wanted

A bay window in my kitchen.

That sounds great,
doesn't it, dad?

To accommodate this
bay window, of course,

We'll have to lose a good
portion of this wall also.

Another wall? Why don't
you just dynamite the room?

Steven, would you hear him out?

Look, I'm sorry.

This is... This is just
all happening too fast.

I think we need a little
more time to decide

Exactly what we
want to do in here,

To mull over george's
wonderfully innovative

And insane ideas.

We'll call you in
a couple of days.

Do you have a card?

Call me.

We'll talk.

Dad, how could you
let george go like that?

He was our only hope.

The kitchen of tomorrow
was almost in our grasp.

Believe me, we
don't need george.

His ideas aren't right
for our lifestyle.

We need somebody who
understands our house,

Who knows it,
who cares about it.

Who might that be?

You're looking at him.

[All groan]

All right. Let's just try
to make the best of it.

I guess we should unpack first.

Who gets the hanger?

It's my room. I
think I should get it.

Rebecca, what am I going
to do with all of my clothes?

Why don't you wear them?

I got suits.

I'll look like a tweedy
version of the michelin man.

Alex, I just don't think
this is going to work out.

Come on, it's an adventure.

Didn't you ever have a roommate?

Didn't you ever go camping?

Get trapped in a mine?

Alex, I have a
confession to make.

All right. Don't
make it a big one, ok?

We don't have the room.

I was an only child.

I always had a room of my own.

And I went away to a very
exclusive boarding school.

And everyone
had a private suite.

Do you have the
address of that place?

The point is, I've never
lived with anyone,

And I'd rather
not start with you.

All right. All right. Ok. Ok.

You think this is
a picnic for me?

You think this is
my idea of paradise?

Do you think I planned this?

I'm not so sure.

This is all beginning
to make sense

To me now, alex.

It's all becoming very clear.

First, you beg for
me to take you along.

I agree, out of the
kindness of my heart.

Then your reservation
mysteriously disappears,

So I have no choice
but to take you in.

Coincidence? I think not.

You got me, rebecca!

You got me.

This has all just been a ploy

To spend a night in
this room with you.

The plane trip,

The blizzard...

Every hotel in
chicago booked solid.

I arranged that.

Sure, it cost me some bucks...

But it's all part
of my master plan.

The banking
convention... A ruse.

None of these
people are bankers.

They all work for me.

Hey, bill, harry, larry!

Yeah, go home!

No, she's on to it.

No, we'll try again next
year with another girl.

Fine! Great!

As a matter of fact, rebecca,

The whole damn city of
chicago does not exist!

This is my basement!

Ok, alex. I think
you've made your point.

I apologize.

My accusation was uncalled-for.

I accept your apology.

I think we need a
little air in here.

I'm beginning to
feel claustrophobic.

We could open a
window or something.

Good idea.

Look at the bright side.

At least we can't
push each other out.

This is crazy.

I'm exhausted.

All I need is
just a little rest.

Good. Good. Good idea.

Just go ahead.

Are you going to breathe
that loudly the whole weekend?

Why don't you just k*ll me now?

Ok? Throw my body into the hall.

We'd have more room.

Look, we have a
meeting in two hours.

Could we have
some quiet, please?

Ok. Fine. I'll try
not to breathe.

Are you going to hover over
me like that the whole time?

I plan to.

I'm having such a good time.

Look, alex, why don't
you just get a rest, too?

Fine. Ok. Sure.

Tell you what... I'll
sleep in the bathtub.

It's a standup shower.

All right. You can lie here.

Thank you.

Great.

Ok, this is great.

Yep...

This is cozy.

Man: sit, ubu, sit.

Good dog. [Barks]