05x43 - Check It Out!!

[bunniefuu]

From Thorny

Toshi Sasaki Tetsunosuke?

Kondo Yeah, he's a member of the famous Sasaki family

Kondo that produces all those elite members of society.

Kondo But for some reason,

he's the only failure who screws around

and doesn't have a job.

Kondo He was becoming a problem, so we took him in.

Okita So basically,

he's a spoiled brat who was forsaken by his parents

Okita because they didn't want to look bad.

Toshi Kondo-san, this isn't a juvie.

Toshi You should turn him over to those other cops, the Mimawarigumi.

Tetsu Yeah, it's me.

Toshi They're a bunch of elite cops from famous families.

Tetsu I'm in a dojo or something right now.

Tetsu This is lame.

Toshi Isn't their leader a Sasaki?

Tetsu Can I go home?

Okita They probably kept shuffling him

around until he ended up here.

Okita Fine, let him in my first squad.

Okita I'll send him straight into a battle and straight to his grave.

Kondo No, the higher-ups won't be happy if something happens to him.

Toshi Then we can give him some menial tasks to do.

Kondo No, he'll start whining.

Kondo Right, Toshi!

Kondo You mentioned that you had a bunch of busy work

Kondo that you wanted to delegate to an assistant.

Check It Out!!

Tetsu Yo, I'm Tetsu.

Tetsu Uh, your name is Toshikata?

Tetsu No idea what an assistant does,

Tetsu but I guess I just have to lay the smackdown on that Joi g*ng?

Tetsu Nobody beats me in a fight, fo' shizzle.

Tetsu It's not my policy to listen to anyone weaker than me.

Tetsu I don't follow anyone else's rules.

Tetsu We're all born equal and free.

Tetsu Then you got your friends and your enemies.

Tetsu So if you try to boss me around, I'll go beast on your ass.

Tetsu Watch yourself, 'kay?

Tetsu I might lose control.

Tetsu Be fair, be square.

Tetsu We cool, Toshi?

Tetsu Yeah!

Toshi Hey, you little prick.

Toshi Don't chew when you're introducing yourself.

Toshi I got enough of your type in the th volume of Oishinbo!

Toshi And why is one pant leg rolled up?

Toshi I think one leg is shorter than the other?

Toshi There, now they're the same length! Oh, boy.

Toshi Listen up.

Toshi You're on our turf, so you follow our rules.

Toshi For dumb boys like you,one slip and it's seppuku time!

Toshi Doesn't matter who your dad is!

Toshi I'll send your head flying all the way to your dad!

Toshi Yeah! We cool, Tetsu.

Tetsu We BFFs now, yeah!

Toshi Yeah.

Tetsu Well, let me know when there's a fight going down.

Tetsu I'll bring all my buddies.

Toshi Appreciate it.

Kondo If we kick him out, he won't have anywhere to go.

Kondo Just go easy on him.

Kondo It'll take time to work him in.

Toshi It'll take time? How much time?

Toshi How am I supposed to stop myself from k*lling him before then?

Yama Vice chief, I heard you got an assistant?

Toshi Y-Yeah...

Yama That's great.

Yama You've mentioned how busy you always are.

Yama So where is he?

Toshi I have him running errands.

A Sweet curry?

A Spicy curry?

Tetsu Yeah!

Yama Uh, that corner of the room is oozing New York.

Tetsu I'll do sweet curry. You do spicy curry.

Tetsu Good stuff.

Yama Excuse me.

Yama Could you give me my curry?

Yama Uh, what? What are you doing?

A Hey, hey, hey!!

Yama What?!

Yama I don't have any money on me!

Yama All I have is a plate of rice!

A Hey!

Yama Why are they acting like this is some kind of drug deal?!

Tetsu Cherry boy!

Yama Don't call me a cherry boy!

Yama How can you even tell?!

Mayonnaise five days a week! -Hijikata

Yama Hey! What did you slip in my pocket?!

Yama No, thanks!

Yama I don't need your goods!

Yama Hey! Stop it!

Yama Wait! It's curry?!

Yama Effin'!

Kondo No, no, no, no!

Kondo You're not supposed to swing with your wrist!

Kondo Use your entire body to swing!

Kondo The sword requires concentration!

Kondo Hold your breath!

Kondo Then swing for everything you're worth!

Kondo This isn't some wimpy sport!

Kondo Fancy tricks won't get you anywhere!

A Hey, hey! Pass!

B Gorilla, come on!

Kondo I'll repeat myself!

Kondo Fancy tricks...

A Hey, hey! Gorilla!

B Gorilla, pass!

Kondo Listen up!

Kondo I'll repeat myself one last time!

Kondo Your left hand is only there for support!

All Nice shot!

Toshi Hey, Tetsu.

Toshi Can you turn it down a bit?

Tetsu What? I can't hear you.

Toshi Can you turn it down?!

Tetsu Okay, okay!

Tetsu So you're also a fan of these crazy lyrics.

Toshi No, Toshi hates hip-hop.

Tetsu Shit! What are you doing, Toshi?

Toshi Hey, Tetsu.

Toshi You can't keep doing this forever.

Toshi This is your last chance.

Toshi I'm sure you've realized that you'll never get

anywhere in society like this.

Tetsu Shit, I don't need another lecture.

Tetsu You can't boss me around.

Tetsu This is how I choose to live.

Toshi If you run into a wall and pretend

it doesn't exist, you'll never make any progress.

Toshi The wall will never change.

Toshi So you're the one who has to change.

Toshi Right now, you're just rattling off excuses at the wall.

Toshi You're nothing more than a kid.

Toshi Before, you might have gotten away with that.

Toshi But in our line of work, one wrong move and you die.

Toshi If you're going to drag down the Shinsengumi,

I'll have to cut you down.

Toshi When a warrior fails his duty, he commits seppuku.

Toshi We used to be as dumb as you,

Toshi but we were able to make it this far.

Tetsu Then cut me down.

Tetsu I can never be like my brother.

Tetsu I don't belong with the Sasaki family,

and I don't belong here.

Tetsu I was born a failure.

Tetsu So I'll live as I please and die as I please!

Tetsu Nobody can stop me! Yeah!

Toshi Cut it out!

Toshi Stop! Stop the car!

Tetsu Yo, big guy!

Tetsu Whatcha looking at?!

Tetsu Got a problem?!

Toshi Hey, stop it!

Tetsu I got news for you!

Tetsu Imma cop! You'a flop!

Tetsu Into the slammer you drop!

Tetsu Yeah!

Gin Huh? What?

Gin What was that?

Toshi Bad idea, Tetsu!

Toshi You don't want to mess with him!

Toshi He ain't nothing like the flimsy walls you've been running into to!

Toshi He's rotten to the core!

Tetsu Listen up, yo!

Tetsu Imma cop! You'a flop!

Tetsu Into the slammer you drop!

Gin No, I heard that part.

Gin What did you say after that?

Tetsu Yeah!

Gin Huh? Yes?

Tetsu I said yeah!

Toshi Uh, that was the least important part!

Gin I can't hear a thing over this racket.

Tetsu No!

Tetsu f*ck!

Gin Eh? Did you say f*ck?!

Gin Did you just call me a f*ck, bitch?!

A f*cking jump!

B f*cking crazy monkey!

Gin Don't call me a Fashion Leader!

Gin I know what you're trying to pull, frickin' Dankan!

Toshi Nobody has any idea what you're talking about!

Toshi Nobody said anything about fashion!

Toshi Hey! Stop messing around in the middle of the street!

Tetsu Shut up!

Tetsu I'm gonna make f*ckin' Curly here pay!

Gin Don't make fun of my curls!

Gin Though I can understand why you're jealous.

Tetsu I challenge you to a dissin' rap battle.

Tetsu I'll embarrass you so you can never show your face in this town again!

Toshi Hey, they're doing something over there!

Toshi Why are they dancing in the middle of the street?

Tetsu Yo, yo. Tell me where your momma's from.

Tetsu Shimane? Akabane? Shirogane? Kingdom come?

Tetsu Wait, have you seen my underwear, bum?

Toshi Why are you joining in?!

Toshi You're gonna punch him?!

Toshi Is that how this battle works?!

Gin Yo, yo. You tell me where your momma's from?

Gin Chris? Fifi? Mori? Kawai?

Toshi Who are you trying to diss?!

Toshi Is this a not-so-subtle jab at their horsey faces?!

Gin Wait, your underwear was in the pool, Fakina!

Toshi You had his underwear?!

Tetsu Effin'!

Man What was that for?!

Toshi Why are you celebrating?!

Toshi Aren't you supposed to be friends?!

Toshi A total stranger has joined in!

Tetsu I lose, bro.

Toshi To who? You're all losers in my mind.

Tetsu Will you do another collaboration with me one day?

Gin Huh? What? What was that?

Tetsu B–

Tetsu Bro!

A Suspect arrested at PM

A for interfering with an investigation.

Toshi What?

Toshi You guys are...

Isabu Were we not needed?

Isabu Forgive me.

Isabu I didn't mean to trespass on the Shinsengumi's territory,

Isabu but I couldn't allow that villain to sully your name,

Isabu for I am a fan of the Shinsengumi.

Toshi That uniform...

Toshi You guys are...

Isabu I am honored, as a fellow defender of Edo,

that the infamous vice chief recognizes us.

Isabu I am the chief of the Mimawarigumi, Isaburo Sasaki.

Toshi The Mimawarigumi...

Isabu Our uniform was based off of yours.

Isabu You can see that I am a rabid fan.

Isabu I've added my number to your address book under Sabu-chan.

Isabu Feel free to message me when you want.

Toshi My phone!

Isabu I'll add you as Toshi-chan.

Toshi B-Bastard!

Isabu Oh, forgive me.

Isabu I don't have many friends, so I lost myself for a moment.

Isabu Please don't get the wrong idea.

Isabu Like I've been saying, I am a fan of the Shinsengumi.

Isabu Your organization is a miracle in itself.

Isabu Penniless beggars with no pedigree or training to speak of

Isabu banded together to keep Edo safe. A touching tale.

Isabu I thought you might be able to

do something with the Sasaki family's failure,

Isabu but it appears that he didn't belong with you either.

Isabu I believe that the Shinsengumi require

Isabu any member who breaks their code to commit seppuku.

Isabu You don't need to fear the Sasaki family.

Isabu Feel free to cut him down whenever you want.

Isabu We don't need this stain on the Sasaki family's honor.

Isabu Worry not.

Isabu I've already deleted the mistress's son

from my address book.

Toshi Sorry.

Toshi I deleted my address too.

Toshi Along with the address of my excellent pupil here.

Tetsu Toshi...

Toshi You see, I only have room in my address book

for Thorny boys.

A Hey, have you heard?

A The vice chief had a run-in with the Mimawarigumi.

B I've been hearing a lot about them recently.

A Yeah, they're a new force,

A but they've already accomplished more

A than a lot of other police organizations.

A And I've heard that their chief, Isaburo Sasaki, is incredible.

A He's the heir to the Sasaki family.

A He can fight with two swords.

A And his skill with the pen is no less.

A A master of three weapons.

A They say the Bakufu relies heavily on him.

B Speaking of which, the vice chief's new assistant is a Sasaki.

A Yeah, they're half brothers.

A I heard that the vice chief was defending him.

B Seriously?

B I figured the vice chief would have gutted him

already for his behavior.

A Got that right.

Tetsu Excuse me, senpai!

Tetsu If it wouldn't trouble you too much,

Tetsu could you allow me to use

the vending machine behind you?!

Both Huh?

Tetsu My apologies.

Tetsu I've been entrusted by the vice chief with an urgent mission.

Tetsu Uh, I think he wanted Mayoston Lights.

Tetsu Huh? Did he want menthols?

Tetsu No, wait. There's an urban myth

that menthols can cause impotence.

Tetsu I can't let the vice chief become impotent!

Tetsu No, wait!

Tetsu Smoking is bad for the lungs,

Tetsu and the smoke is harmful to other people,

especially infants, children, and the elderly.

Tetsu I can't let the vice chief become an impotent cancer-ridden m*rder*r!

Tetsu Damn! What do I do?!

Tetsu I know!

Tetsu If I buy him one of those instead,

he won't become impotent! He'll become happy!

Tetsu But wait! This is bad for kids!

Toshi Just buy my damn cigarettes!

Toshi And I didn't ask for Mayoston or menthols.

Toshi I wanted Mayoboros, got it?

Tetsu Yes, vice chief sir!

B Uh, Vice Chief?

Toshi Why are you standing around? I'll make you commit seppuku.

A Yeah, we can do that later,

A but who is that?

Toshi Are you asleep?

I already introduced him.

Toshi He's my new assistant.

Tetsu Tetsunosuke Sasaki!

B Wait, I've never met this guy before!

Tetsu I apologize.

Tetsu I was embarrassed by my baby face, so I wore sunglasses.

A Wait, sunglasses have nothing to do with facial hair!

Tetsu After doing some thinking,

Tetsu I've said goodbye to my old self and started anew!

Tetsu I've given up on being a bad boy.

Tetsu I'm moving forward from B to C.

Tetsu I have matured into a cherry boy!

B Uh, you're going backwards?!

Tetsu From now on, I will serve the vice chief

and help the Shinsengumi protect Edo!

Tetsu Hey, show your manners.

A Hey, his buddies went in the other direction, from B to A!

A They're Akiba boys now!

A You're all regressing!

Cat Wait, Tetsu. Why do you keep bowing?

Tetsu What? I'm trying to be sincere here.

Band Are you hard?

Tetsu I'm not hard!

Tetsu Are you hard?!

B They sound so cherry! Those were the days!

Cat Then stand up straight.

Tetsu You go first!

Band Stop trying to buy time.

Toshi Out of the way.

Tetsu Please wait, Vice Chief!

Tetsu I'm not hard!

Kondo I see. Toshi did it again.

Kondo Well, I could never tell if he was doing his job or just picking fights.

Kondo He's a real troublemaker.

Kondo Hey! What are you doing?!

Kondo Run!

Kondo If you give up, the game's over!

Tetsu You don't understand.

Tetsu If you and Toshi make an enemy of my brother,

Tetsu he'll crush me and all of you in the process.

Tetsu You should have listened to him

and tossed my useless ass out on the street.

Tetsu I'm sure you're all sick of me.

Tetsu You wish I would go away.

Tetsu I know how you feel.

Tetsu That's how I've always been treated,

Tetsu ever since my mother died and

I was brought to the Sasaki home.

Tetsu I've gotten used to it.

Kondo You ever heard the name Thorny?

Kondo It's for nasty kids that prick you if you get too close.

Kondo That's what we called the bad boys where I come from.

Kondo Including him.

Thorny Toshi.

Kondo He was bad enough to make you guys look like babies.

Kondo He spent every day fighting thugs from the local dojos.

Kondo A foolish boy who chose to live inside the thorny thicket.

Kondo That Thorny boy must be possessed by a devil.

Kondo That's what they all used to say.

Kondo But it wasn't like that.

Kondo He was no different from you.

Kondo That was the only place he had to belong.

Kondo Toshi was also the son of a mistress.

Kondo His father was a rich farmer where we came from.

Kondo Toshi was the secret son who didn't pop until his father died.

Kondo But the oldest son, Tamegoro, was a good man.

Kondo After Toshi lost his mother and his home,

Kondo Tamegoro took him in and looked after him.

Kondo Toshi was very fond of him.

Kondo But it didn't end well.

Kondo When he was eleven, there was a large fire in the village.

Kondo Some brigands used this chance to break

into their home and attack Toshi,

Kondo but Tamegoro protected him and lost his eyes.

Kondo The next thing he knew,

the brigands were strewn across the floor.

Kondo His siblings stared at him with fear,

Kondo and the dried eyeballs on the floor stared at him in silence.

Kondo That was when they started calling him Thorny.

Kondo And he could no longer be with his beloved brother.

Kondo He defended you because he knows how you feel.

Kondo Having to endure the hate of your family.

Kondo Being indebted to your brother.

Kondo Not having a place to belong.

Kondo Being an outsider.

Kondo But Tetsu, even after he went astray,

Kondo after he threw himself into the thorny bramble,

Kondo he never stopped moving forward.

Toshi Stronger! Become stronger!

Toshi Stronger than everyone else!

Kondo He couldn't get over the fact that

he wasn't able to protect the people he loved.

Yama Hey, hey, hey!

Yama Hey, pass!

Kondo We're all the same, Tetsu.

Kondo We're all outsiders and failures here.

Yama Hey, pass!

Kondo But we never gave up on becoming respectable men

Kondo and eventually, we made it here.

Kondo That's how men find a place to belong.

Yama Stop hogging the ball!

Kondo You keep advancing,

cutting your way through the thorny brambles,

Kondo leaving a trail.

Yama I'm here.

Kondo Eventually, you're joined by others and the

trail becomes a wide path.

Kondo I can't tell you what to do now that your family doesn't want you.

Kondo You have to choose your own path.

Kondo But if you want a place to belong,

if you want respect,

Kondo you can never stop moving.

Kondo Never stop walking through the thorns.

To Be Continued

{\fad(, )}The situation

{\fad(, )}suddenly gets worse!

Thorny and Rosy

Tetsunosuke has had a change of heart, but a g*ng of bad boys is looking for trouble...

Meanwhile, Gintoki has been taken by the Mimawarigumi, where Isaburo asks him to go on a mission.